Lunch Time
"Whatcha doing, sis?" Big Macintosh asked Applejack one day, trotting up to her.
"Gonna prank Rainbow Dash."
"What'd she do this time?"
"Put a bucket of honey over the door, so when I went through it, it fell on me. She said honey went good with apples. Took three hours of Rarity scrubbing to get my fur clean. And the whole time Rarity was going on and on and on, asking when my last bath was, if I wanted to use some of her new conditioner. Uck, I should have just shaven my coat."
Big Macintosh sighed and shook his head. "Sis, we gotta get this harvest moved. Apples gonna fall and get bruised if we don't get 'em first."
"I don't think you understand, Big Mac. I had to listen to Rarity for three hours! Only reason I went to her was because she has the best shampoos."
"Coat does look good, sis."
"Thanks."
"But I need your help with this harvest. One pony just can't do it alone. You know that. And Apple Bloom is takin' care ah Granny after she tried ta go swimmin' in the piranha pool again."
"Three hours, Big Macintosh! All I wanted was some help getting the honey out, but then she was insisting that I needed a full treatment. And once she's got you, there ain't no getting out of there easy."
Big Macintosh sighed, and shook his head. No use in arguing with his sister when she was like this, and the more time he spent arguing, the less time he would have to harvest. Sighing, he trotted off, prepared that he would have to do everything himself, as usual.
"Gonna prank me, RD," Applejack said, grinning wide. "I'm gonna show you what's what. You like hot sauce, right RD?" Applejack selected a bottle she had bought from Hot Tamales in Ponyville, something he simply referred to as, "Rated X." She gently doused a plate of hay with it, though grew slightly worried when the hay took on a distinctly crimson hue. She shrugged. Rainbow Dash was such a pig, she probably wouldn't even look at her food before she scarfed it down.
"Awe, too hot for ya, RD? Here, why don't you wash it down with some lemonade? Oh, wow, what's wrong with ya face? Sorry RD. I guess that was just lemon juice and I guess I put in salt instead ah sugar." Applejack snickered as she set the mug of tart yellow fluids on the table, beside the red hay. And yet, it didn't seem like enough. She really wanted to break Rainbow Dash, make her lie on the ground and beg for mercy. And looking about the barn, Applejack's eyes finally settled onto a jar of blue herbs. She snickered, smile spreading ear to ear. "You know, RD, I think it's been too long since we've had a visit from Rainbow Crash."
Even Rainbow Dash wasn't so much of a glutton she wouldn't notice that she was eating Poison Joke though. So Applejack had to be clever...
Taking a knife into her mouth, she very carefully set about chopping the Poison Joke up, mincing it into a fine garnish. Not eager to shrink back down to Appletini size, she was very careful in scooping the garnish up, and lifted it over the plate of hay. She carefully sprinkled the herbs over the red colored hay, sprinkling it as careful as she could. It wasn't the blue herbs that caused her troubles in the end, but rather the Rated X hot sauce that tickled her nose, and she suddenly felt a sneeze coming on. She tried to drop the knife from her mouth, but when she sneezed, the finely minced herbs flew into the air. Applejack gasped, taking a deep breath, and then sneezed again. A third sneeze rippled through her, and she looked around the barn, looking out at the open door and the fresh air, and took a step, only for still another sneeze to ripple through her.
It must have been a hell of a sneeze, too, because she actually felt herself lift off the ground. In fact, before she could land, she had sneezed again, and again, each time lifting higher and higher, until at last she pinched her nose shut with both hooves to stop herself. She looked down, to see she was several feet in the air, hovering over the table and the plate of hay, but oddly, the table seemed much bigger than it should have. Of course, she didn't have time to linger on this oddity. After a moment, she was falling, speeding through the air, finally landing hard... on top of the pile of hay. It took her a moment to get her bearings, to realize what had happened and where she was, but the moment she did realize, she gave a frustrated scream. "Not again!"
She wasn't even Appletini size, as a matter a fact. Looking herself over, looking at the plate and how large the strands of hay were, she was even smaller than she had been the first time she been exposed to that cursed plant. Was it because of continued exposure, she would be getting smaller each time? Or was it that she had gotten the wrong plant in the first place. There were all sorts of weird stuff in that damn forest. She simply selected the first blue plant she saw, figuring it had to be Poison Joke, but what if it was something else? What if it was some sort of shrinking plant? Most of all, what if there was no cure?!
"AJ?"
"Rainbow Dash!" Applejack shouted. She looked in the direction she assumed was forward, and as quick as she could, attempted to push her way through the forest of hay.
"AJ, you in here?"
"Rainbow Dash!" Applejack shouted, struggling and fighting with the long strips of hay. The slick hot sauce that doused the strips made it nearly impossible to push them aside, not to mention she had packed the hay so densely on the plate. She squirmed and kicked, or on her belly wiggled forward and squirmed beneath the thickest bushels. "Rainbow Dash! By Celestia, I'm on the plate!"
As if the density of the hay and the slippery coating wasn't bad enough for little Appletini, the ground beneath her suddenly shook, as if in an earthquake. Applejack braced herself, but then resumed wiggling and squirming, inching along, struggling, until she finally pushed aside one long strip of hay and was able to look forward, only to see Rainbow Dash's wide open maw. Applejack froze where she was and stared forward, shocked and terrified by what was now before her. Rainbow Dash must have picked up the plate, and was now preparing to swallow all the hay down in one massive gulp. The plate lifted higher, and then began to tip. Applejack watched as Rainbow Dash's massive tongue rolled out, resting over the dull, boxy teeth of her lower jaw. Strands of drool dripped off the top row of her jaws, strings of it connecting to the bottom. "Rainbow!" Applejack finally screamed, before gravity pulled the hay forward, and brought it and her into the awaiting maw.
Applejack hit the moist surface of Rainbow Dash's tongue first, and had just enough time to push herself up before the tons and tons of hay suddenly came down upon her back. The world went dark as Rainbow Dash closed her mouth, took a moment to brace herself, and then gulped the large mouthful down. She quickly opened her mouth wide open once more, and allowed the second half of the plate of hay to slide down and into her massive mouth, gulping that down so it would join the rest in her plumped belly.
"Ah..." Rainbow Dash sighed, fluttering into the air so she could rub her tummy with both her forehooves. "Could use some hotter hot sauce, but not bad. Gotta thank AJ when I see her. I wonder where she is any-hic."
The hiccup caused Rainbow Dash's flutter to break, and only by quickly beating her wings did she manage to stay airborne. "Mmm, maybe I ate a bit too fast. Feels like the hay is trying to escape." She looked down at her gut, slightly plumped from just how much she had devoured. If she looked closely, she almost thought she could see tiny ripples over the blue of her belly. She passed it off as gas, and gave her belly several soft rubs, eventually coaxing out a large belch. The belch was so large, in fact, that she was pushed back in the air. Attempting to remain airborne, she quickly resumed flapping her wings, but found she was still falling. Confused, she flapped her wings harder, and harder, soon reaching a hummingbird's speed just to keep herself propelled. Quickly feeling fatigue bite at her, she looked down at the ground, only to see it spiraling seemingly a thousand feet down. Frightened, confused, she looked about, seeing that everything was farther away, save the table, which seemed infinitely larger than it had been before.
"Awe, damn. Applejack, what did you do?!"
Rainbow Dash carefully fluttered to the table. When firmly planted, she stretched her wings out carefully, working out a couple cramps and kinks that had quickly formed from how hard she was working to stay in the air. She belched loudly, and rubbed her stomach tenderly, groaning at the feel of something kicking and squirming inside her, and sat down, trying to think. If this was Applejack's doing, then where was she now? Why hadn't she burst into the barn after Rainbow Dash shrank, ready to gloat and brag about what she had done? In fact, when the barn door swung open, Rainbow Dash was fully expecting to see her friend trotting inside, a wide grin on her face.
Instead, Big Macintosh came trotting in, green eyes swaying side to side. "Sis?" he asked. He sighed. "Sis, I'm not one to complain, but come on. I really need your help with this harvest. I can't do it alone!"
Rainbow Dash looked back at her wings, stretching them gently, delicately. She beat her wings several times, and then managed to work them into a furious flutter that lifted her small body off the ground. She looked forward, relieved to see that Big Macintosh was trotting towards her, which meant less distance she would have to cover to reach him.
Big Macintosh sighed as he stared at the dirty dishes that his sister had left behind. He was going to carry it back into the house and wash them himself, but thought better of it. Applejack would never learn if he kept cleaning up after her, and that's not why he had come in here in the first place. His belly was rumbling. Big Macintosh was a big horse, of course, so he needed to eat quite frequently, and sat down before the table. He put the soiled dish to the side, and placed a piece of bread on a plate. Then, reaching for a bundle of hay, he cut it open with his teeth and began delicately placing the straws of hay onto the bread, fixing himself a nice sandwich.
"Big Mac!" Rainbow Dash shouted, beating her wings furiously to stay afloat. She couldn't even reach eye level with the massive pony; all she could hope for was fluttering near his mouth. Several times, strong gusts of his breath blew out of his massive nostrils, pushing her through the air. She managed to resume her furious flutter, and return to his mouth, shouting and screaming at him, only for him to blow her away again, this time with a snort.
"Damn flies," Big Macintosh muttered, and one of his massive hooves lifted into the air. He swatted carelessly at the humming bug, missing it by a few inches, though that was on purpose. Big Macintosh understood that the flies that frequently buzzed around the farm were simply hungry, and sometimes swatting at them was deterrent enough that they would go find someone else to pester. He didn't really want to hurt it, any more than he would want a giant pony to come along and swat him when he was trying to eat a sandwich. But this fly was persistent. He snorted loudly, blowing a gust of hot air out of his snout, and seemed to have dealt the final blow to it. But then the annoying squeaks and buzzes of the fly resumed, and Big Macintosh sat back carefully on his large rump, lifting both his hands.
"Big Mac!" Rainbow Dash kept hissing, screaming, waving her arms in the air in a vain attempt at gaining the giant pony's attention. She was staring at his lips when she noticed his tongue slipped out and to the corner, as if he were concentrating on something. She panted and fluttered a few more inches up, trying to reach his face, and not noticing that his two forehooves were now lifted at either side of her. Before she could reach his line of sight, he had swung his arms together, and crushed her between the two barn sized hooves. When Big Macintosh pulled his hooves apart, Rainbow Dash found herself falling. Squished and crippled by the two hooves, Rainbow Dash found she did not have the strength to flutter, and simply fell, a little blue spec plummeting through the air and landing with a muffled plop onto the piles of hay that already lay upon the bread.
Big Macintosh shook his head sadly. He didn't enjoy hurting things smaller than him. A veritable giant among ponies, he had learned early that his raw power could cause a lot of pain, and a gentle soul at heart, he rarely used even a tenth of his brute strength. Usually his immense size was enough to curb the anger of any hooligans he came across. He didn't even enjoy crushing flies, but he was hungry and annoyed at his sister's disappearance, and just wanted to eat and resume the work that would keep his family afloat for another season. Someone had to be the responsible one, after all.
Rainbow Dash had just enough time to look up before a mountain of hay was dropped upon the bread, smothering her completely beneath it. She hissed and she fought and she pressed against it, but there was simply too much upon her back for her to budge it. After another mountain of hay was dropped upon her, she was utterly crushed and simply lay there, unmoving.
Big Macintosh piled the hay high, licking his lips eagerly. He was s big pony, with an understandably massive hunger. When the hay was stacked a few feet high, he took a slice of bread and pressed it down, squishing the hay (and a certain blue Pegasus) as flat as he could. Salivating, he lifted the sandwich up to his lips, opened his mouth wide, and then closed his teeth on it, taking a massive bite.
With what little room she had, Rainbow Dash had been struggling and crawling in whatever direction she thought was forward. As far as she could see, there was only the yellow of the hay, but suddenly that yielded to pearly white teeth, just inches away from her nose. She was so close, in fact, that a strand of saliva that ran down the massive tooth actually rolled forward and onto her face. She coughed and spat at it, and then crawled those precious inches forward, and looked to see Big Macintosh, chewing his mouthful happily.
"Mac!" she shouted, but the squeeze of the hay compressed her chest, and kept her lungs from properly inflating. "Macintosh! You dumb brute, look at your food! By Celestia, and they say I'm a pig."
Macintosh savored the mouthful of hay. It was a small luxury in a long work day, and he just wanted a moment to enjoy it. Off in the distance, he thought he heard Rainbow Dash calling his name, and looked out the window to see if she were coming in. When he didn't see her, he assumed she might be outside waiting for him; he opened his mouth wide, prepared to swallow the rest of the sandwich in one gulp.
Rainbow Dash watched with horror and awe as the mouth opened wide. Big Macintosh's pearly white teeth lined the massive maw, and just past that was the huge red tongue, and past that the black abyss of the colt's throat. She stared in utter horror as she was lifted higher and closer, the warmth of Big Macintosh's breath blowing over her and making her cringe. His breath smelled of hay and saliva and sickening warmth. Rainbow Dash started squirming a little harder, but just could not escape the hay and bread's smothering embrace. Once more she attempted to scream out for him, but all that emerged was a comically high pitched squeal. If Big Macintosh heard it, he didn't stop, and after a moment, he had tossed the rest of the sandwich into his mouth. He chewed quickly, mashing up the hay and bread between dull teeth, and then tilted his head back to swallow hard. Finding a little bit of difficulty in the act, he braced himself, and swallowed again, gulping it all down and allowing it to settle in his belly. That felt rather nice, actually. He enjoyed having a nice large bundle of hay in his gut, making him feel pleasantly full, and giving him the strength to continue with his work for the day. He belched suddenly, and embarrassed, looked about, concerned someone might have seen. He lifted one of his fore hooves and gently rubbed his swollen tummy, trying ease himself, but burped again. It felt like the hay was beating against his stomach walls, trying to get out. Impatient hay, he mused. It would get, probably tomorrow morning or so.
He trotted outside and looked about, expecting to see Rainbow Dash waiting for him, but she was nowhere to be found. How strange. He must have just been hearing things, or she had been zipping about the clouds so quickly, her voiced echoed over the horizon, or something like that. Whatever it was, there was no time to think about it now. Apples needed his help in falling, and with a content sigh, he trotted off to the southern area of the orchard, the trees of which remained virtually untouched.