Into the Depths Part 7
Older Writing from the Past. This is the final part of a story that I wrote to someone I was dating at the time to let her know how I was through writing.
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Into the Depths Part 7
"I don't expect many people to get this far. So, I am going to take out all the barriers. I hope this next section doesn't bog you down too much," I told Kalae. She had an arm around my back and I hers as she laid her head on the side of my right arm, "I'll finish this with you. You've told me a lot about you now." "There is one part let that is a newer part of me but that I've touched on since I was a kid. I will be giving you the short short version and it will likely be a bunch of narration," I told her. She nodded, "Bring it on!" I laughed and moved down the narrow corridor to a white stone ornamentally etched door. The etchings were of different streaks and curves in one corners and a contrast of square patterns in another corner. In the center, small quick etchings for stars streaked up to the stone white door handle. I placed my paw on it and turned around, "Are you ready?" She nodded and I opened the door and passed inside with her. We stood there observing the room. I had designed it but I still took in it's features. It went up into a big round circle into darkness. The pathway we stood on stayed narrow and rung around the circular room providing a walkway that bordered on a pit into darkness. Then, at four points was a sculpture of a disk in a sideways oval that had another thin line driven through it. The design was set into the wall and jutted out into each of the four points. A walkway went out into the darkness, with a sheer drop off to each side into the darkness to meet in the center and a center that was a brazier with red and golden etched light in the center of it that rose up in a ball, the red light inside of the gold light in a semi orb. The light illuminated the walls which had so many designs and shapes etched into it, from Dragon to depicting scenes. They were all of an intrigacy I continued walking down a few steps and along the pathway and out onto the walkway with sheer drops to either side. Kalae followed close behind sometimes putting a paw to my back. We continue, though, until I was right before the large round brazier and turned around. "The thing is. I don't know what i want in a relationship with a girl of your level. I haven't had many g/f's or went out with many people, so am very inexperienced in the dating scene and with gurls. That I want to go out with girl, said person may have to accept the stuff about me in the depths. I believe in God. I believe in Jesus as it is on Earth. "How open of a christian and where on the faith are you? I consider myself a christian to the end that God exists and did a bunch of stuff and sent his son Jesus, whoever believes in him with their heart and express it through their mouth are saved. "Most christians who are full of themselves on being bible thumping probably wouldn't approve of things I have done and still do and like to do. I think they are reading into the meanings of the bible too much. "I do believe he can most certainly do anything he wants, en infinitum in all the universe as well know it, but I believe we were more than created in his image. Are we not his children, didn't he create us, do our Dad's create us? Dad has his house and his land, would you go take your Dad's house away from him if he was God? Why do you defile his house, his land, why do you spit in his face? I just think people look at God and this life too narrowly. I agree, we should be focusing on here now, but God is both here and now and the hereafter. It all cascades. Either way, the most important question is, how far will you go? I mean, we are with God, no doubt, we will be with God in Heaven, to be sure. "I just refuse to believe we are done then. I can't sit around forever doing nothing in heaven meeting with family and friends but I'm likely to be out of sense. I love my family, I love God, but I like to go explore new horizons. I challenge everyone to consider, for the longest time, we were told it would be good, it would be great, nothing to worry about. "I don't care if I am overstepping my boundaries. I don't want to take God's place, I don't want this universe. This is God's universe. But, like a son who must eventually leave the house of his father to seek out what is in this world, it must come to pass that we will seek out our own when we are ready to leave God's house. "I could settle this now, and forever, should you be right for me. It is all I require, for I have a place for a Key to the Lock that is me, only one person in this life can be the key and can have that key. A few have attempted it but have not connected with it, in some I'm glad because they are my family members. If they would connect in that level, then wow, I would be fully in love, respect, and committment." Kalae blinked and stared at me. I sighed and continued on, "You should brace yourself, I have been considering this for some time. I know a fool sometimes uses so many words so I will sum it to one sentence: 'We will be Gods after we die and we are being trained for it in the here and now.' Here's the details and a bunch of strict preaching: "This is not meant to be anything. This was already dumped to paper in another way. This is a re-stock of principles. "This should be taken with a glass of salt. This is in no way a statement or maxim, this means nothing to the next person and only their own self can determine truth for themselves. This is very difficult to put together as it can mean anything when all forces and stakeholders are taken into consideration. "We are inevolutes Children of God caterpillars in a cocoon to the next evolution. We can only pass through the evolution to the next form when we die. The next form is that we are gods of our own limitless expanse of parallell universe. The bible is quite right. God does not want us to obtain this immortality, he is afraid of us in a way, We are never able to take over his position in this universe and he is incapable of giving us anything the same level as him. He can keep us here for an eternity but he can also release us to finally evolve into the next stage of evolution and to take over our own universe. The devil/satan is controlled by god, used to test us and to determine our obedience and to act as an attack power against those he does not like. "If I were taken into heaven right now, I would expect God to release me to obtain the next level of evolution. "I will willingly go to hell for God if this is warranted. I will let myself be broken until there is no hope left, like the pit I am in already, this is fine. I would rather opt for a servant of hell than to be put into heaven. I don't think I could stand to be all good, and such light fluffy flowery seems like brainwashing from my standpoint here where good is no good. From this perspective at least. It may change when I am in that reality. The difference between good and evil would be as clear as in drawing breath. "Until that day, I have what I have here. I don't see God as so harsh, more of a being having seen many unfathomable things. This is just Gods way of a parent to a child saying, you are going to die, this is bad, don't do it. The punishments are just too harsh for a parent. "You just don't come out even doing it. The way you preach, the way you are trying to win people by force, just don't do it by force. The church teaches you to do it by force, do it by suggestion. Do it by sublimination of that sort you learn about it. The people can tell you of it all they want, and they say this even to themselves, but the will must be willing or there is no point. "These things you live by everyday and what they represent to you cannot make you happy unless you make them so. Even the religion of christianity doesn't say you will be happy everyday. The way christianity really works is it has a set of principles and means by which it tells you to go about everyday life. A lifestyle. Strictly speaking, from the bible to the words of the mouth of those that practices it leaves a wonder to what is the proper interpretation. There is an explaination to everything, even when the principles and means fail which it does teach. What of one thing to one religion takes its way to the other religion, is christianity the sole pioneer in these old principles. "What if these are our ancestors out of the sands of the earth are telling us of how to live our lives joyfully? "I don't know. I only care when things around me and things in me break down. The lesson I can learn is the one I should have listened to from myself from the first suggestion of it when I started writing it. This is, why do others need to know it? This stuff is sacred only to me, it can mean anything to me. "Anyways, I have an entire document where I go on even further. I could let you read that next. What do you think?" Kalae turned around and ran back toward the door, throwing it open and ran out through it. I turned around and mounted the brazier and jumped into the light orb at the center of it and sat down inside of it.
And finally the last quote from Casablanca: "And you never will. But I've got a job to do, too. Where I'm going, you can't follow. What I've got to do, you can't be any part of. [Kalae], I'm no good at being noble, but it doesn't take much to see that the problems of three little people don't amount to a hill of beans in this crazy world. Someday you'll understand that. Now, now... Here's looking at you kid."
Thusly you, if you are the real person behind Kalae or whoever the reader might be, have successfully completed the Seven Circles of me, the author. Rejoice, for now you know parts that make up a good deal of what I am and have been.
Now, will you accept me as I am to my past experiences and what I am now or will you go. How accepting are you really? It's your choice. Yes or No.