Lost Paradise

Story by Kazy0008 on SoFurry

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#4 of joke for furry campfire or relax in good mood

Kazy continues are journey in the afterlife


The four jokes to be read are independent;

-Scam in Hell -Lost Paradise -The Gold of Paradise -Crossed the desert

Reading in the timeline give the thread of a small.. Little story.


--- LOST PARADISE ---

"My dear Kazy! my sweet drake! do not confuse tourism and IMMIGRATION


A cell phone rang, the goat answered, his phone was red (I later understood that it was called "the red telephone" for direct and instant communication with the high authorities of paradise).

The goat was angry, I understood that there was a procedural flaw for my admission to hell; he led me straight to the entrance of his estate, with a last hug, burning like hell! yeah! not surprising!

Here I am again on the way (trips form youth)

Arrived again in paradise, the archangel was on vacation, I was greeted by a deer-angel, always immaculate white with beautiful feathery wings as we can imagine.

He was in his simplest apparatus, admiring for his beauty, my eyes could not resist looking at him and ... and down lower ... a little lower down the groin, where floated a little cloud.

I shook my head, ho! the eternal question! "What sex are the angels?"

With its beautiful antlers, I wondered especially if there was something in this tiny cloud.

Me who introduced me to him in a hermaphrodite form, I was red with confusion by looking him in the eyes again!

  • "Well, my dear Kazy, we have a big project for you!

And here we go among the corridors and corridors, with multiple endless closed doors.

  • (Kazy) "Where are we going?"

  • "You are here in the sanctuary of the angels of which you will soon be part"

  • (Kazy) "Me, a ... angel"

From there a cry of unbearable agony sounded behind a door, I looked at the angel, ?? .

  • "Ho! It's nothing, here we make holes in the skull to wear the halo!"

After a few minutes, after corridors and doors closed , again screams even more horrible to freeze the blood of a fire dragon ...

Trembling, I was watching my angel again, ??? .

  • "Here we make holes in the back to fix the wings of the angels, do not worry, we'll just tear off your wings, dig two holes and you have a nice pair of feathery wings like me"

  • (Kazy) "wings, but I love my wings"

  • (Kazy) "NO! NO! I'm going back to hell"

  • "But think, there you will be abused, raped, taken by three demons at the same time"

  • (Kazy) "Uh ... YES, BUT HOLES ARE ALREADY DONE !!!"


EPILOGUE

YES!, I understand your worries, you think it's the end, Kazy is screwed up ... is no, my friends from the NDE (near-death experience) had all planned, they had hacked the systems from the afterlife and sent viruses - result - All the dragons from all universes and parallel worlds were summoned to paradise.

You imagine, an ocean of dragons as far as the eyes can reach.. NO! you can not imagine it, only I really saw that!

By the way, I saw you there! YOU !! Dragon who reads me, intimidated, frightened. Do not worry! I will not tell anyone, it's our secret;)

In the end everyone was dismissed, and so did I.

When I finally woke up in the world of the living, all my friends were around me (...) happy and bursting with laughter.

I learned that I was the winner of the game, I had gone to the afterlife for many weeks and yet I had left my friends for only 90 seconds.

That was the longest seconds of my existence and they certainly changed me forever ...

see you soon! readers