FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

XXXIX

Confession Time

The ferret exhaled as he grabbed another bottle of rum and started to drink. Traegar snorted as he paced back and forth, staring at Glud as he grasped his dirk with one paw. Kurwin removed the bottle from his lips and exhaled after downing a good portion of the rum. He smacked his lips a few times before he looked at Glud and smirked.

"You want some?"

"I'm-I'm...I'm good, C-Cap'n," Glud replied.

Kurwin shook the bottle. "Ya sure about that?"

"I ain't thirsty, sah."

Kurwin sniffed. "Right. Sure. Or maybe you poisoned this bottle too."

"I-I'd never do that, Cap'n!"

"Then drink the rum."

Glud shook his head. Kurwin scowled and stood up. He removed his knife from his waistsash, prompting the aging ferret to back away. Before Glud had the time to blink, Kurwin slashed him across his cheek, drawing blood. Glud shouted, and then started to choke when Kurwin shoved the top of the bottle far into Glud's mouth. The ferret spluttered and coughed as Kurwin tilted the bottle backwards and emptied the contents of the glass bottle down Glud's gullet. Kurwin tossed the bottle aside and backed away from Glud as he started to cough repeatedly.

"Guess we're both fucked now, eh?"

"I...I didn't poison the rum!"

Glud wiped the fluids from his mouth and backed up again when Traegar and Kurwin stepped towards him, their weapons drawn.

"Start talkin'," Traegar growled.

Glud huffed. "Wot's there to say? You can already guess why they're doin' this."

"Dirtfoot an' I have had our differences before. He never resorted to plannin' a mutiny. Why's he so adamant now?" Kurwin asked.

"I dunno, 'cos we lost all our ships? 'Cos o'er these past several years, we've lost too many pirates to count? 'Cos he doesn't agree with yer plan to take o'er Mossflower? I could go on, Cap'n!"

Kurwin nodded. "Then continue. Explain everything."

Glud rubbed his head. "We...we had a talk some nights ago, shortly after we assaulted that MSB camp. He told me somethin' 'immediate' had to be done 'bout you, 'bout all this nonsense! So me, him and Muslar talked. They wanted to know if I was with 'em or not. So...so I played along. I-I told 'em I'd help 'em."

Traegar growled. "So you're admitting yer treachery?!"

"NO! Jus' lissen to me!" Glud stammered. "I didn't know how far they were gonna go, okay?! I thought they were jus' runnin' their mouths! It wouldn't be the first time!"

Kurwin stared at Glud and snorted. "You bumped into me on purpose. That day Ishlin died."

"I...I-I had a feeling...so-so I figured, it'd be better to play--"

Kurwin stomped towards Glud and kneed him in the groin. The ferret shouted and fell to his knees, his head in front of Kurwin's crotch. Then Glud gasped when Kurwin tilted his head upwards and planted his knife against his neck. Glud whimpered as the captain panted in his face, his breath reeking of rum and grog.

"You knew Dirtfoot was gonna kill me an' you stood there and didn't warn me?!"

"NO! I-I swear! I didn't know how far Dirtfoot was gonna take this; I didn't know he'd try to kill you so soon! So I made you drop that wine bottle 'cos my gut told me Dirtfoot might try somethin'! D'you really think I'd let Dirtfoot kill you?!"

"You let him kill Ishlin. All you had to do was open yer fuckin' mouth an' he'd still be alive," Kurwin snarled.

"Don't you think I know that?!"

Kurwin noticed that Glud was whimpering and tearing up. The captain growled and took his knife away from the ferret's throat. He let Glud stand back up, and he sniffled and wiped a tear away.

"Why d'you think I'm here, Cap'n? Why d'you think I told you all this?! We already lost one captain 'cos I didn't speak up. I can't...I'm tired, Kurwin. After the shit Tilhym put this crew through, I can't go through another mutiny, Cap'n. I won't. You--we...we have to stop Dirtfoot an' Muslar."

"How do I know this ain't all bullshit? How do I know you ain't the one who poisoned Ishlin an' yer usin' Dirtfoot and Muslar as scapegoats?"

"'Cos they told me to kill you! Tonight! 'Cos they said if I don't kill you by tomorrow mornin', they're gonna kill me!"

Traegar smiled sinisterly. "Sounds like a plan to me! Let's wait it out 'til morning, Cap'n! If Glud's dead, we'll know he was tellin' the truth!"

Kurwin scoffed. "I'm tempted to go with that idea."

"I..." Glud shut his eyes and rubbed his head with one paw. He sighed deeply as he shook his head and sniffled. "I'm not...I'm not gonna stand here an' waste my breath, Cap'n. I made a mistake. I-I know that now. An' I'm-I'm tryin' to make up for that. I'm tired of us killin' each other; I'm tired of us bickerin' like savages; I'm tired of beasts like Dirtfoot doin' shit like this to beasts like you! ...I told you wot I know. I told you wot Dirtfoot an' Muslar plan on doin'. It's up to you t'choose ta believe me or not."

Kurwin leaned against one of the posts inside the tent and exhaled. "It ain't necessarily we don't believe ya. But we jus' lost Ishlin. Wot yer sayin' is that Dirtfoot an' Muslar are committing treason."

"I know."

"Then you know wot I must do t'both of 'em."

Glud nodded. "I know."

"Hmph."

"I...I understand if...if you don't plan on--"

"Get out."

The ferret blinked. "Wot?"

"Go sleep with the others, preferably away from either of those two rats; I doubt they'd be dumb enough to risk killin' you in a crowd. I'll try to stay out of sight tonight."

"W-wot about you? Wotcha--"

"We'll handle Muslar and Dirtfoot. Don't worry about it."

Glud exhaled hard and slowly backed away from the weasel and ferret. He nodded again slowly and wiped his eyes again. "Thank you...I'm s--"

"I said get out," Kurwin snarled.

Glud gasped softly before he backed away. Then he turned tail and ran outside the tent, leaving Kurwin and Traegar alone to contemplate. The captain huffed deeply as he sat back down on his cot and rubbed his forehead, sighing. Traegar stared at his tired captain as he reached over and grabbed another bottle of grog. The ferret grunted as he removed the cork from the bottle and quickly took a long drink from it. After the fiery fluids rushed down his throat, Kurwin lowered the bottle and coughed and sniffed. Traegar moved closer to him, but the ferret held up his paw and grumbled.

"I'm fine," he growled.

Traegar glared at Kurwin's eyes and how the beast was sitting. It was all he had to do before he shook his head.

"No, you're not."

Kurwin looked up at the weasel and leaned back on his cot. He chuckled wryly and spat on the ground. Then the ferret shook his bottle for a moment and blinked.

"S'just...it's so much easier, y'know? I c'n jus'...all I gotta do tomorrow is wake up, an' tell everybeast, 'Fuck it. Let's steal a ship. Sail far away from this stinkin' shit-hole.' An' everybeast would nod and agree with me. 'Cos secretly, that's wot they want. We...we could sail again. We could find an' island, rule it as our own. You could...you could feel them wooden planks beneath yer footpaws again. I could walk around me own ship again, yell at you lot fer pissin' on the floor when ya know you shouldn't. We could make more friends on the sea...find more pirates. Establish connections and a-a tradin' route, perhaps. Our own li'l network...empire even. Yes...our own li'l empire on the seas. I miss that...that salty sea air, that crisp wind blowin' on me face. Just...just once, y'know? Wouldn't mind smellin' that again."

Kurwin stared at Traegar again and snorted. "That's the easy way. That's the way I want t'do it. It'd be so much simpler, an' everybeast would be happy with my decision. An' then these goodbeasts would come along, fuck it all up fer us. Wotever empire I build on the sea--they'd just ruin it, burn it all down, kill us all. S'wot they do."

"Cap'n, I-I'm not--"

"But the right way," Kurwin continued, interrupting Traegar, "is to keep doin' wot we're doin'. It's to take the fight to them, to band all us vermin together an'-an' to flush everybeast who opposes us out of the way. An' then we won't have to worry about anybeast else ruinin' our empire--on land or on sea. That's wot beasts like Dirtfoot don't understand."

Kurwin took another long drink of grog before he smacked his lips and wiped his mouth off. "They're babes, Dirtfoot an' Muslar. I told 'em, 'No, you can't eat dessert first. You gotta eat all them green vittles so ya grow big an' strong.' But they wouldn't have that. They whined, they complained, an' then they decided to physically hurt me. But instead of hurtin' me, they hurt Ishlin. An' they ain't sorry about it either. Maybe Glud is--he came clean. He confessed. But these other two...hmph. Can't let this go on. Can't let it happen again. So now we just gotta punish these two babes."

Traegar exhaled and sat down beside his captain. "I understand--"

"No, you don't. Until you rule over yer own crew, you'll never understand. Heh, jus' 'cos I make it look easy don't make it so. You think any ol' beast can pick up a bow an' arrow an' become a master archer?"

The weasel shook his head. "I get it, I gotcha. ...But you are our captain, Kurwin. Don't matter if you like it or not. You own this crew now; you've led it for many seasons, through all the good an' bad. You can't break down now all 'cos you're getting 'tired.' You think it's easy for me? I always have to back up your decisions. I always have to guard you, at all times. I coulda easily betrayed you too, y'know."

"And I coulda easily left this crew to rot, an' venture out on my own."

Traegar snorted. "But I didn't," he said in unison with Kurwin.

Kurwin smiled as he turned and faced Traegar. "And we never will."

The two beasts kept staring at each other's smiles for a moment. All they could hear in the distance was the wind occasionally blowing and some of the insects chirping and making noises around the woods. Kurwin looked away and grunted as he stood up from the cot and stretched.

"Right then, 'nuff o' this sentimental shit. Glud said they want me dead by morning. So we gotta handle this tonight."

"Got it. We'll catch 'em separately; if we're lucky, they're prob'ly sleepin' or drunk."

"Good."

"Jus' to be clear, when you say punish..."

"Muslar an' Dirtfoot can never do this again. Understand?"

Traegar paused for a moment before he nodded. "Okay. I'll get Dirtfoot--"

"I'll get Dirtfoot. You find Muslar. He's jus' Dirtfoot's bitch; Dirtfoot's the only one dumb enough to be the leader of this mutiny. I'll handle him myself."

"Fair enough. I am curious though. How d'you know nobeast else is with Dirtfoot?"

"Relax," Kurwin said with a smirk. "I got somebeast on it."

---

The brown weasel was still sleeping, even with all the other beasts around him still wide awake. Gyges snorted and snored, his right leg hanging down the tree branch and his mouth wide open. Sharkbait looked up at the snorting weasel and giggled.

"Sleepy Gyges sounds like a stripedog, don't he?"

Turvin rubbed her temples as she tried to drown out the weasel's snores. "Aye. Fuckin' horde could be right under his nose an' he still be sleepin'."

A fox looked up at Gyges as well and spat on the ground. He folded his arms and looked around the section of the forest, still curious as to why he was in the middle of a group discussion this late at night. The campfire beside them was large, giving off enough light to illuminate all the beasts in the area. The fox could see Turvin, Slipfoot and Sharkbait. Gyges was in the trees snoozing away. Razzik and Blowhorn were sitting together, with a majority of the beasts in the group sitting away from the latter. The fox turned around after hearing some leaves rustling and saw a gray rat stomping towards the campfire and wiping his left paw clean.

"The fuck you been, Tugger?! Feels like it's been seasons since we last saw ya!"

The rat looked down at the fox and sniffed. "Ah been 'ere this 'ole fuckin' time, Bloodeye!"

"So...wot, while all this other shit's been goin' on, you been chokin' yer cock in private all this time?"

"Oh, fuck off," the rat said in a huff.

Tugger sat down beside the fox and folded his arms. He spat on the ground and snorted as he looked at everybeast.

"OI! Fuck we all doin' 'ere?! 'Bout time fer me t'get more sleep in 'fore Hellgates bursts open!"

"You all know why we're here," said another fox.

Everybeast got quiet as a tall reddish-brown fox stood up and stepped close to the fire, revealing himself. Bloodeye glared at the vulpine and chuckled.

"Hey, Slivik! Ain't seen yer arse in a while either! You been busy strokin' with Tugger too?"

Slivik ignored him and looked at all the beasts around the campfire. "I gathered you all 'round here so we can discuss everythin' that's happened."

Turvin shrugged. "Beasts died. We're still tryin' ta take over this cesspool of a forest."

"I'm aware of that. But I'm not stupid either. I've heard some chatter here an' there. Some of you have, err...'issues' with the captain and his recent ways."

"Wot, like how his plan to instigate this Badger Lord is backfiring?"

"I wouldn't say backfiring, but after what happened to Ishlin, some beasts in this crew are upset with the way Kurwin is doin' things, an' some beasts wanna hurt him anyway they can."

"Are ya that fuckin' surprised mate? Lookit alla shite's been goin' on since 'e's been runnin' this fuckin' crew!" Tugger blurted out.

"Tug--"

"No, Turvin, no! That cocksucker is the reason why alla this shite's been 'appenin' ta us! We were o'er a thousand strong at one point! Alla vermin 'round us; alla beasts 'round the seas; alla allies ta 'elp us when we were in trouble! The fuck 'appened?! Mutiny affer mutiny affer, fuckers double-crossin' us, Kurwin burnin' bridges, Kurwin refusin' 'elp when we needed it most--all 'is fuckin' plans led us ta where we are now! We ain't even got a single ship wif' us now, an' o'er two-thirds o' this crew is dead! Why the fuck we still followin' 'im?!"

There was a long silence after the gray rat's rant. Some beasts began to murmur, while Slivik just looked at the rodent and shrugged.

"Yer absolutely right. Kurwin has made several mistakes in the past. Some were his fault; some weren't. It's a travesty to be a part of this crew. You should get up and leave at once."

"Pfft! Fuck off wif' that bollocks!"

"I'm serious," Slivik snarled. He pointed into the dark forest and nodded. "Door's that way. Get yer arse out. Go back to bein' Jeslin the Jester. That was your stage name, right?"

Tugger stared at the fox and gritted his teeth. "Yew shut yore fuckin' mouth."

"No. You say Kurwin is fuckin' everythin' up? Leave. Go back to livin' out yer comfy life on some posh island. Go back to havin' everybeast laugh at you as you make a fool out of yourself fer entertainment. Go back to humiliating yourself for a livin' as you slowly grow old and die a lonely death, where everybeast will only remember you for all the times you did somethin' stupid to get some beasts to chuckle. But hey. Least you'll still be alive, right? Least you won't be 'round Kurwin, right?"

Tugger and Slivik glared at each other briefly. The rat blinked as he remained seated. He spat near the fox's footpaws and swore at him, but he didn't get up and leave. The fox nodded gently before he started to walk around the fire.

"So who else? Who else shares Tugger's 'pain'? I'm sure there's quite a few of you who aren't so tolerant to what Kurwin is doin'."

A majority of the vermin around the campfire kept their mouths shut since they knew Slivik would tell any of them what he just told Tugger. Everybeast held their tongues, up until a slender dark brown weasel looked up at the fox and flared her nostrils.

"If anything, I thought you'd be with Tugger on this one. I know ye don't hate Kurwin, but that don't mean being part of this crew is all fun and games."

"Who said it would be, Olfyn?"

Olfyn rubbed her muzzle and shrugged. "Don't you think you've reached a point where you want to leave? To go out and find somethin' better?"

Razzik turned and faced the weasel. "Wot else is better fer-fer beasts like...like us?"

Olfyn shrugged again. "Anything. Never killed anybeast before I joined this crew. Never tortured anybeast either. Now I lost track of how many beasts I've slain. And the sad thing is that I've grown to like it, even though I know it's wrong. S'no different from drinkin' grog; we all know damn well it ain't healthy for us, but we drink it anyways. I keep asking myself why some of us are still here, why we're still goin' around killing and raping indiscriminately."

"Same reason why I'm still here. Same reason why Slivik hasn't disowned Kurwin even though his brother pe-perished during a--one of the battles Kurwin instigated. We've no place else to go. We've all l-lost something, Olfyn. I lost my family; Slivik lost his brother; you lost--"

"I know what I lost," Olfyn snarled.

Razzik quickly shut his mouth when he noticed Olfyn was barring her teeth. She quickly calmed down and resumed talking.

"I just feel like we've reached the point where we should be telling ourselves we c'n do better, that there's more to this life than this."

Bloodeye snorted and butted in. "Sounds to me like yer sayin' you're better'n us."

"I'm not saying that at all. I'm merely saying I'm self-aware of what I'm doing, and that's what's eating at me. Is it better for us to go out there and risk running into monsters, or is it better for us to stay here and become monsters just so we don't have to run into other monsters?"

Razzik sighed and shook his head. "Look, we-we all knew wot Kurwin was the day we saw him skin a beast alive. We, um, we all know wot he's capable of, and we're-we're all still here by his side. I don't...this ain't about right or wrong, Olfyn. It's about friendship, and family, and all that other sappy bullshit. That's why we're all still here, and you know...not leavin'. We're all too attached to this crew now, whether we like it or not. It don't matter wot any of us does; we still care about each other...and we still love each other. Don't you...don't you, u-um, think it's sayin' something that you're still with us, even after everything you've seen and done?"

Olfyn didn't respond. She just shrugged as she gripped her spear and drew lines and figures in the soil. Slivik was about to resume talking when he looked up at Gyges still snoring on the tree branch with drool running down both sides of his mouth. He grumbled just as Slipfoot hopped up and stood by him with a smug grin on his face.

"C'mon now, wotcha gotta complain about?! We go 'round sailing the seas, travelin' to new places, findin' treasures--"

"That was before we lost all our ships," Bloodeye pointed out.

"Tch! Big fuckin' difference--we got footpaws, don't we? We can walk, can't we? Wot's stoppin' us from doin' the same shit on land that we did out on the sea?"

"Ooh! OOH! Sharkbait knows! Sharkbait knows this one!"

Slipfoot sighed and rolled his eyes as he looked at the energetic stoat thumping his tail on the ground. "Yes, Sharkbait?"

"SQUIRRELS! Like-like the ones from MSB! And-and the longee-ear beasts from the Stomp Patrol!"

"Long Patrol," Slipfoot corrected.

"And riverdogs from holts! And-and big stripee-dogs! And giant birds with massive talons that rip through flesh! And, uh--and the mice and hedgehogs and other warriors from Redwall! And uhhhh...MERCENARIES! And assassins! And other vermin--"

"OKAY, SHARKBAIT!" Slipfoot shouted, as he smacked his paw against his forehead. "Look, the point is, it's dangerous here--we all know that. Was it any better out there? We had to worry about a mutiny, rival pirates, thieves and rogues from small communities located at ports. There were whirlwinds, whirlpools, the Whirly Bird an' her dreaded crew. Crocodiles, giant birds, sharks, giant fish, icebergs, thunderstorms, hurricanes, rogue waves--I can go on and on! Don't matter if it's land or sea or sky--wherever we go, we're in danger all the time. So I don't understand why some of us are whinin' an' bitchin' about bein' on land, about how 'deadly' Mossflower is when bein' out in the sea is just as bad, if not worse."

"Maybe 'cos we know wot's out there? Maybe 'cos we're much more comfortable out there? Maybe 'cos this is foreign soil to us, 'cos we know how to deal with all the shit you just said?" Bloodeye said.

"And yet, despite all that, Tugger here was whinin' about how the Cap'n is responsible fer losin' so much of our crew! Seems to me that the sea was wot claimed all those lives, Jeslin."

"Yah clearly weren't listening to me! Bein' on the sea o' on land ain't the problem! The fuckin' problem is Kurwin; it don't matter where we're at! If Kurwin's leadin' this crew, we're all endin' up in Hellgates!"

Sharkbait blinked. "Aren't we all headin' there anyways?"

Razzik cleared his throat briefly. "I-I think--"

"Shut yore fuckin' mouth, Sharkbait! If any a' yew twats 'ad a fuckin' brain yew would know automatically that wot Kurwin's doin' won't lead to anythin' good!"

"Um...I think--"

Turvin interrupted Razzik. "For me personally, I still trust Kurwin; I always will. But some of you gotta understand that us losin' all our ships and this nonsense with the MSB was really testin' us. Ishlin dyin' may have been the straw that broke the camel's back. There's only so much we can take before some of us throw up our paws and jump ship."

"THANK YEW, TURVIN!"

Turvin looked at Tugger and scoffed. "I still think yer bein' a twat; I'm just pointin' out why somebeasts' faith in Kurwin is waning."

"Hello?" Razzik shouted.

Slivik ignored the black rat and exhaled. "But isn't that exactly why all of us should be closer than ever? It's all some-some fuckin' test or whatever--that's all it is. That's why my brother and Longfang and all the others were taken from us; that's why we just lost Ishlin. If we see a giant mountain blocking our path, we don't just shrug and turn around! We climb that sonuvabitch until we get to the other side!"

Razzik scowled. "Fucking shut up!"

Razzik gritted his teeth as he listened to more beasts shouting and arguing with each other, refusing to give him time to speak. The rat was about to stand up when Blowhorn, who had been silent for most of the conversation, smirked and grabbed the rodent's shoulder.

"Relax mate. Let me show you how it's done."

Razzik stared at the dirty rat as he stood up and walked beside Slivik. He covered his nose in advance, already aware of what the smelly rat intended on doing. Without any form of warning, Blowhorn leaned over as he took his right footpaw off the ground. Everybeast shut their mouths once their ears were flooded with a cacophonous trumpeting noise. At first a few vermin thought somebeast was blowing a horn, but when they saw what position Blowhorn was in, several of them immediately plugged their noses or groaned. After the din died down, everybeast dropped their debate altogether and started scowling at Blowhorn.

"Again with this bollocks?!" shouted Tugger.

"Thanks. Always wanted to taste one of yer deadly gas bubbles," Bloodeye sneered.

"Now's not the time, mate," Razzik whispered.

"Seriously, Blowhorn? Yer gonna do this shit now?" Slivik asked.

Blowhorn spat. "Yeah, yeah, I am gonna do this shit now! Lookit all of us, sittin' here bickering about all this pointless bullshit! 'Oh, Kurwin did this; Kurwin did that; Kurwin didn't do this; Kurwin didn't do that! These beasts died; those beasts died; a mutiny happened; some vermin went rogue; some bridges got burned! Drama, drama, drama, drama, drama, drama!' Just. Fucking. Shut up. It doesn't matter. It happened already. Happen_ed_. With an 'ed' on the end of that bitch! We can't change wot did or didn't happen, so why are we sittin' here complaining about it? Things went wrong. Beasts died. We lost our ships. We're stuck in Mossflower until further notice. End of story!"

Turvin waved a paw in front of her nose. "So wot was the point in you blowin' ass at us?!"

"Just provin' a point. Y'all notice how the stench is already starting to die down?"

"Yeah, so? Wot of it?"

"That's the point! Wot of it?! All of ya were disgusted for a brief moment, but now it's just 'Eh, wotever. Smell's gone now.' That is exactly what we're goin' through now. Ishlin's death, losin' our ships, runnin' low on beasts and supplies--it's all just a temporary setback. Somebeast blasted some gas at us and we're still reeling from the odour! But after some time, the wind will kick in an' blow the 'stench' away! Heh, now if we all decided to rebel against Kurwin, or broke away from this crew..."

Razzik frowned when he saw Blowhorn squatting. "Wot--NO!"

"DON'T YOU FUCKIN' DARE!"

But Blowhorn didn't care what anybeast else thought about him or his repugnant behind. A majority of the beasts either turned away or groaned when Blowhorn started grunting and passing more gas. But it wasn't until the trumpeting noises turned into crackling squelches that all the beasts started shouting at the rat over how vile he was. Blowhorn sighed with a content smile on his face as he voided himself and slowly lowered his tail. Then he stood up and grinned with his arms folded, acting nonchalant.

"FOR FUCK'S SAKE, BLOWHORN! Could you really not wait?!" Turvin asked.

Slivik plugged his nose as he backed away from the brown rat. "We're tryin' to discuss all the shit that's been goin' on and you think it's appropriate to present us with actual shit?"

Blowhorn nodded. "Yeah. Yeah, I do actually. You wanna know wot happened a couple minutes ago? All I did was release gas--it was a lot of gas, but just gas nonetheless. And after a moment, the wind blew the smell away, as if it never happened. But see, this back here..."

Everybeast groaned when Blowhorn turned around, lifted his tail, and showed off his soiled trousers. One of the vermin started retching when he saw some of the waste sliding down the back of his legs.

"That's a stink that never goes away! No amount of wind or fresh-scented plants or soap or wot have you can get rid of it! You can leave it on the ground and let it sit for days; it's always gonna have that lingering odour that nobeast can stand!"

Blowhorn chuckled as he started to walk around the campfire, intentionally getting close to some of the other pirates so they could get a nice whiff of his messy trousers. Bloodeye drew his dagger and snarled when Blowhorn invaded his personal boundaries.

"If you don't get the fuck away from me now, I'm gonna shove this so far up yer arse you won't be able to shit ever again!"

Slipfoot rubbed his forehead with one paw as he kept his nose plugged with the other. "I'm assumin' you did that fer a reason. Just hurry up an' get on with it!"

The dark brown rat sniffed. "Right. Point is, if we leave Kurwin's crew, or rebel against him, or wotever some of ya ambiguous vermin are plannin' on doin', we'll only cement the problems we're currently facing. Don't matter if we go alone, or-or find new mates to be with, or go back to bein' a jester--there's always gonna be that stink followin' us. Our problems will never go away; we'll be spendin' the rest of our lives wanderin' around with shit in our shorts! And as you can all plainly see, this is not a stench anybeast wants to put up with! So wot do you beasts want: you wanna face our problems head on, put up with 'em and treat 'em like they're just gas bubbles in the wind, or do you wanna run away from yore problems, let 'em manifest into a pile of shit in yore pants that never stops followin' you?"

"Whichever one doesn't involve faeces," Olfyn stated.

Almost everybeast got quiet afterwards, short of a couple beasts who coughed or retched as the wind carried Blowhorn's noisome scent towards them. Blowhorn sat back down beside Razzik and folded his arms, still grinning over what he just did. Razzik quickly scooted away from him and coughed.

"You couldn't pull yer trousers down at least?" Razzik asked.

"Tch! Where's the fun in that?"

There wasn't much debate after Blowhorn's disgusting display. Most of the chatter died down to murmurs and Gyges' obnoxious snoring. But with everything Slivik, Blowhorn, and some of the other creatures said, they knew most of the beasts had stated everything they wanted to say. Slivik looked around at all the beasts he gathered around the fire, hoping that everything he said had swayed any ambivalent minds. But when he glared across the flames and saw Tugger scowling at him, he realized there still might be a potential threat in the crew. The fox pretended not to notice his glare and looked up at Gyges. He was drooling so much that he was gargling on his own saliva, and most of his muzzle was wet. Slivik shook his head.

"Fucker's still sleeping..."

Slivik looked away from the snoring weasel, unaware that his left ear had twitched after he spoke.

---

"Well. This was easier than I thought."

The light brown stoat rubbed his nose as he stared at what was left of his tribe. Almost half of them had perished fighting the MSB, while the other half were gathered around a set of bonfires and were either unconscious or mostly inebriated. The Juska clan leader sniffed as he consumed some of his grog and exhaled. He knew he'd be better off drinking water, but at the same time, acting slightly inebriated was better than fully pretending. The stoat smiled widely and feigned a slurred laughed. That's right, he told himself. Just do wot that ferret pirate told ya.

"Now there he is! There's our precious leader!" Jaleen shouted.

Fleckle pretended to laugh again as he bowed. Then the stoat yelped when he fell forward. He knew he wasn't drunk out of his mind, but he knew how he acted when he was; all the other beasts around him would lower their guard if they believed he was too intoxicated to stand properly. The Juskamard leader grunted as he stood back up and dragged his footpaws over to the same log Jenrik and Argyle were sitting on. The giant plump rat quaffed another bottle of grog in one massive gulp before he set the bottle down and patted his thick gut.

"More grog! Jenrik still thirsty! C'n still drink grog!"

"You drink anymore grog an' ya'll be pissin' all o'er yerself all night!" Jaleen shouted.

Jenrik laughed after hearing the ferret's words. He slowly tilted backwards along the log until he shouted and fell flat on his back, with his legs still up as he showed off the area between his thighs. Jaleen and the other beasts laughed at the rodent while Fleckle sniffled and kept glaring at his crew. He looked to his right and saw Argyle smirking at him.

"Ya gon' finish that, sah?"

Fleckle turned his head away, the fox's breath so strong that it almost burned the hair in his nose. The stoat responded to the fox's question by taking the bottle to his lips and consuming the rest of it. Then he exhaled and shook the empty bottle in front of Argyle's face.

"Naaah...URP! Feel free tersh drinkee wot's lef!" he said, still feigning his slurred speech.

Argyle snatched the bottle away and grunted as he stuck his tongue inside in an attempt to lick the last few drops of grog from within the glass. As the fox tried to consume what was left, Fleckle looked up ahead and saw an arctic fox and a short fox with large, black, wide ears sitting alongside Jaleen. The fox with tawny fur scratched at his belly while the arctic fox glared at Fleckle and grinned.

"So whatsa big plan now, Juska leader?"

"Ehhhh, dunno mate! Not like ish eveah mattah! Jussa big dumb stoat who can't count right, ain't I, Iris?"

The bat-eared fox sitting beside the arctic one laughed in a high-pitched tone, and spoke very quickly. "Nonsense! Yer better'n that pompous twat Ferrin! Always has been; always will be!"

Iris sniffed and rubbed her muzzle. "Aye! Best day o' me life was when we saw that fucker's head on a pike!"

The tawny-furred fox laughed again. "Thought it was when you finally got Argyle's cock in ya!"

The arctic fox snorted at the vulpine beside her. "Let's not bring that up again, MacFayden..."

Argyle took his tongue out of the bottle and snickered. "Really? I sure as hell would!"

The Juskamard clan all laughed at the drunk fox's words. Fleckle kept glancing at everybeast in the tribe, looking at those who were sleeping and those who looked like they were about to vomit. He curled his toes a few times before he exhaled and scratched his neck.

"Ahhhh, always did enjoy these moments. Nuthin' betta'n sharin' some drinks wif me tribe!"

MacFayden hiccupped and rubbed his massive ears. "Aye! Rord never let us do this! He always hogged alla good wine an' vittles while he gave us piss and bread all the time! Least now we're all equals, sharin' the same shite you're privy to!"

"Gotta admit though, 'twas a lot safer wif Rord 'round!"

Jaleen blinked and nodded. "Yah...it was." She paused for a while and leaned forward. Fleckle thought she was about to vomit, but the ferret just smirked. "Fuckin' borin' though. All we did was eat an' fuck an' shit everywhere."

Iris glared at Jaleen's chubby stomach and grinned. "An' grew fat."

"Oi, least I ain't jus' fur 'n' bones like you and Elrym o'er there!"

Fleckle turned and stared at the tan fennec fox who was sleeping on the ground, his face stuck in a puddle of his own bile. He glanced over at Jenrik and could see he passed out while he was still in an uncomfortable position. Then the stoat looked around at all the drunken or sleeping beasts before realizing how few of them were left. Fleckle rubbed his paws together before his tail went limp.

"...I'm a horrible leader."

Argyle snorted and punched Fleckle's right shoulder. "Bah, loada rat shit that is! Ain't no worse'n Rord was!"

Fleckle blinked. "You all know it's true. Lookit wot 'appened after we joined Kurwin's crew. Lookit how fast we lost nearly half the tribe! Some o' you weren't shy 'bout bringin' it up in front of me!"

Jaleen exhaled. "Aye, I'm upset I lost some o' me mates. But they dead now. Can't do much shit 'bout it now, can I?"

MacFayden exhaled and rolled his eyes. "Yes, Fleckle, we got pissed an' sad when our mates died. An' shite stinks. So the fuck wot? We can't sit on our arses complainin' about how foul it smells all the time, now can we? Shite stinks an' we hate it, but it ain't nothin' we got control over, so we just gotta put up with it!"

Fleckle snorted. "Nevertheless, I know some o' you wish there was a more competent leader for this tribe."

Iris chuckled and looked around at all the vermin. "You serious? Do any of us look competent to lead a Juska tribe? S'far as I know, you are the most competent! Which...which says a lot now that I think 'bout it. But that's just how it is."

Argyle sighed as he leaned over and rested his head on Fleckle's shoulder, moments away from passing out.

"Yous gonna be our leader 'til the day ya die, Fleckle..."

"Which might be sooner'n later!" Jaleen joked.

MacFayden let out another high-pitched cackle. The slender fox licked his lips as he rose his bottle to the Juska leader. "Don't matta. Whether we perish tomorrow or many seasons from now, we're all gunna have a hell of a time 'til that happens!"

"CHEERS!"

Fleckle stared at Jaleen as she held up her bottle of grog and nodded at him. The other beasts around him who still had grog or rum with them and weren't unconscious imitated the gesture. The stoat watched as they all downed what was left of their drinks and either belched or wiped their mouths off with their paws. A couple of them slouched over and passed out instantly while the others kept smiling at Fleckle or nodding at him. The stoat started to smile as well, his eyes nearly swelling with tears after hearing the feedback from his tribe. Maybe he wasn't the perfect leader. Maybe the Juska tribe would inevitably be wiped out in the future.

But at least now, Fleckle could take comfort in knowing that his tribe was going to stand by his side, no matter what happened.

---

I'll be okay, he told himself. Glud and Dirtfoot will handle it. They'll-they'll kill that bastard Kurwin; we'll have a new captain. Yes...yeah, that's right. We'll be fine. Everything will go back to the way it used to be. The grayish-black rat stared at the dim campfire in front of him and blinked. He was still clutching a bottle of rum, but at this point, it tasted like saltwater to him. The slightly inebriated rodent exhaled as he sat on the ground in the woods by himself. He looked all around the forest, trying to see if anybeast was spying on him. Maybe his eyes were betraying him. Maybe the moon wasn't giving off enough light. But all he saw was darkness, and the faint outlines of a few tree branches. Muslar panted twice as he set the bottle of rum down and rubbed his face. All he had to do was wait. Eventually the sun would come up. Eventually somebeast would come along and scream that Kurwin and Traegar were dead. Then he'd swoop in along Dirtfoot's side, proclaim himself as the new first mate. The rodent nodded to himself. It would work itself out. It always did.

Muslar listened to the cacophonous cicadas and some of the crickets making noise around the forest. He thought he'd started screaming for all the insects to be quiet, but he found it oddly comforting. There was nobeast shouting at him to raise the sails, no harsh winds blowing in his face, no raucous singing from a crew of beasts who drank way too much grog and had slurred voices. All he had were the bugs around him, and the fire crackling. The rodent was about to consume more of his rum when he heard leaves crunching in the distance. He reached for one of his throwing knives, but calmed down when he spotted a familiar weasel walking towards him. Muslar was too tired to care at this point, so he just sighed heavily and rubbed his eyes.

"Hello, Traegar."

"Hey."

The first mate stared at the rat as he held a bottle of fish head grog in his right paw. Muslar stopped rubbing his eyes and sniffled.

"Long day, eh?"

Muslar nodded. "Jus' tired, Trae. Haven't had a decent sleep in a while."

"I hear ya."

Traegar grunted as he sat down beside the rat. He took a long swig of the grog before he gulped hard and set the bottle down. Muslar kept staring at the fire ahead of him while Traegar turned and looked at the rodent's bottle of rum. Then he looked back up at Muslar and sniffed.

"So when were you gonna tell me you and Dirtfoot were plannin' on killing Kurwin?"

Muslar immediately went on alert. He turned and looked at Traegar's smug grin with wide eyes. The rat let out a soft breath before he reached for his cutlass. Traegar held up a paw.

"Relax. I'm not here to kill you."

"Ho-how the fuck d'you even know about this?!"

"Seems like Glud caved. He waltzed right into Kurwin's tent, spilled his guts. Told us everything about you three."

"Kurwin knows too?"

Traegar nodded. "He sent me here to kill you. Wanted me to do you in real slow, make it as painful as possible."

Muslar panted several times, his heart beating so fast he thought he was having a panic attack. The rat watched as Traegar drank more grog and sniffed.

"So...so why am I still alive?"

"Why d'you think? Kurwin's slippin', Muslar. We all know that. I know you and Dirtfoot were never fond of him, but I spend much more time around him than you two combined. I know how he thinks, what his plans are. We talk about certain 'issues' you and many other members of this crew are not privy to."

Traegar shook his head. "He's gotta go. He's not the strong, wise ruler he was before. That time has come and gone. That day...before this all started, you didn't see Kurwin in his cabin on that ship. I did. And what I saw was a confused, broken beast desperately trying to save himself from drowning. But the water's already filled up his lungs. It's too late for him now. Somebeast needs to euthanize him."

Muslar let out a hard breath that almost sounded like a chuckle. He watched as the weasel kept grinning and drank more grog. The rat chuckled again as he covered his eyes with one paw and rubbed his face again.

"Fuck...shit, Traegar, you almost made me shit m'self! So this-this whole time...so you understand then! You see why me an' Dirtfoot are doin' this!"

"Yer trying to save this crew. I get that. But don't think I forgot about Ishlin either. You two clowns poisoned him when we damn well could've used him."

"Ishlin was a fuckin' drunk; everybeast knows that!"

"Nevertheless, you three should've come to me before you did anything reckless."

"We-we didn't know who we could trust! We had to keep it secret--you know that! Yer his first mate! Yer the last beast we'd turn to about this kind of information! Hell, we weren't sure about Glud either--look at wot happened!"

Traegar nodded. "Speaking of which, we're gonna have to do something about him. Not kill him--we already lost Ishlin. We can't kill Kurwin and another former captain like Glud; this mutiny will fall apart if that happens. Beasts will see us as hypocritical murderers, not vermin who truly care about this crew."

Muslar nodded as he grabbed his bottle of rum. "Yes, yes, I understand."

The rat brought the bottle up to his lips and quickly swallowed the rest of the fluids inside. He wiped his mouth off and belched deeply before he smacked his lips.

"So should we tell Dirtfoot yore with us? Wot's the next step?"

"There is no next step, traitor."

Muslar blinked and raised an eyebrow. The rat looked down at the empty bottle of rum. And then his eyes grew wide when he glanced back over at Traegar and saw him grinning. The weasel set his bottle of grog down and exhaled as he stood up. Muslar watched in horror as Traegar removed an empty vial from his pocket.

"Sheeka may not be a true seer, but I'll be damned if that vixen don't know a thing or two about poisons."

Muslar listened to Traegar chuckling as he slid the vial back into his pocket. The rat didn't reach for his cutlass. He didn't start screaming or begging for mercy. He just stared at the flames in front of him as his vision started to fade, and he felt weary. The rat slowly rubbed his forehead and exhaled. Muslar shut his eyes for a moment and lowered his paw. He nodded gently and started to rub his paws together.

"How much time?" he asked quietly.

Traegar shrugged. "Dunno. Five minutes maybe?"

Muslar opened his eyes and stared at the weasel. "So...how's it gonna go? Hmm? Am I gonna feel like I'm on fire inside? I'm gunna puke all over m'self, shit m'self an' make a huge mess?"

Traegar shook his head. "Yer gonna get tired and fall asleep. 'Cept you won't wake up."

"I see..."

Traegar and Muslar got quiet. The rat kept rubbing his paws together and staring at the flames while Traegar folded his arms and scowled. The weasel was waiting for Muslar to say something, but he could tell by the way the rodent looked that it was pointless. Even if he begged or lashed out at Traegar, it didn't matter. It was already done. Traegar lowered his arms and sighed softly.

"Why?" he whispered.

Muslar didn't respond. He stopped rubbing his paws and looked down at his footpaws, as if he suddenly found them captivating.

"You owe me that," Traegar growled. "What drove you and Dirtfoot into doing this?"

Muslar's eyes watered for a moment. He smiled and let out a soft chuckle as two tears ran down his face.

"We're pirates, Trae. Not conquerors. We don't belong here...we belong out on the sea. I thought...I thought you of all beasts would understand."

"What I understand is loyalty. Don't matter if I agree with the captain or not. What he says goes. Beasts like you and Dirtfoot are the reason why this crew has dwindled so much."

"No. Kurwin..." Muslar shook his head and shrugged. "There's no point in wastin' me breath. M'dead anyways. But you'll see...one day...one day, you'll look back at this moment...and you'll realize I was right."

"Right about what?"

"Kurwin's gonna doom this whole crew. Yore all gunna die here...'cos ya followed him so blindly."

Muslar shuddered and rubbed his head as his vision faded even further. He struggled to keep his eyes open and felt the energy fading from his body. The rat chuckled again as more tears ran down his cheeks.

"I was always so afraid of this moment...I always thought I'd start cryin', pleadin' fer mercy. I thought maybe I'd go out in...in a blaze of glory, take out as many beasts as I could. But it's...it's calming...peaceful. Welcoming, even. Hmph...guess Dirtfoot will be joinin' me soon, eh?"

"Very soon."

Muslar smirked. "Least I'll have some company."

The two beasts grew very quiet again. Traegar watched as the rat exhaled and slouched over into the grass and twigs. The weasel crouched down and stared at the rodent as his stomach rose and fell with each breath. But after a few more seconds, the rat stopped moving completely, and all Traegar could hear was the fire crackling and the bugs chirping around the woods. Traegar stared at the dead rat for a moment before he leaned over the body. He checked the rodent's neck for a pulse and grunted when he didn't feel one. Nevertheless, Traegar didn't bother taking any chances. He took out one of his knives and stuck the blade into Muslar's temple anyway, just to be sure. Then the weasel removed the knife and wiped the blood off using Muslar's clothes as a rag. Traegar stood back up and sighed nonchalantly, the fire still crackling softly behind him. Trae snorted and kicked some dirt on the fire until the flames were extinguished. And then the weasel walked away, leaving Muslar's cadaver for the insects and worms.

---

Dirtfoot couldn't have been happier. The moment he woke up and noticed the sun was shining down, he smirked to himself. It was a good sign--he knew the weather was telling him that things were finally looking up. Finally, he thought. Finally I can take control o' this crew. 'Bout time Kurwin "gave" the reins to somebeast else! The chubby rat sat up and yawned, already feeling his spirits flourishing. He was still thinking about it, how he should play it out. Heh...maybe I'll gasp, come out runnin', say he's been murdered. No, that won't work--we'll just be in the same situation we're in with Ishlin. The dirty searat snickered as he stood up. Maybe I'll assume command! Yeah, yeah--that'll do! As soon as everybeast figures out wot's wot, I'll take over! Muslar an' that ol' fart Glud c'n be my first mates! Yes...it's all coming together. Won't be long--

"Wot the fuck is all this bollocks?!"

Dirtfoot froze. His smirk widened even further. Already huh? Hmm...guess Glud pulled through. The rat turned and walked out into a clear section of the forest where the sun was shining down on the grass and dozens of vermin all gathered around in a circle.

"Are you serious?! How the fuck did that happen?!"

Dirtfoot knew now was the perfect time. "It's true, my fellow corsairs! We all gotta accept that!"

Everybeast got quiet after hearing Dirtfoot's booming voice. The rat forced himself to keep a straight face, but his mouth contorted into a sly smirk that most beasts failed to notice. Dirtfoot held his laughs in as he started to strut forward, wagging his tail as though walking differently meant he had absolutely power.

"Accept wot? We don't--"

"I know...I know! It's gunna be 'ard takin' in that I'm gunna be yore new cap'n! But there ain't no way 'round it! With Kurwin an' his first mate gone, I'm the new runner-up! Unless you prefer that cunt-licker Kronno or that timid-li'l twat Stinkfoot over me!"

Stinkfoot scowled at the rat and stepped forward. "Wotcha mean 'gone'? And why would we agree to these ludicrous terms?"

Dirtfoot folded his arms and smirked widely. "'Cos I'm the one who slew Kurwin an' Traegar. Anybeast who's got a problem with that is more'n welcome to join 'em in Hellgates!"

Stinkfoot blinked. "Wot the hell are you talkin' about? Kurwin an' Traegar are fine!"

Dirtfoot's smirk, along with his entire world, turned upside-down. "Wot?"

"They're fine you dumb shit! Muslar is the one who's dead! I found 'im this mornin' just lyin' in the dirt! That's why I got everybeast together; I wanted everybeast to know!"

Dirtfoot's eyes widened. His bladder nearly emptied right then and there. The rat breathed softly as he began to back away. Some of the beasts in the crowd stared at Dirtfoot and took a step towards him.

"Dirtfoot...why did you say Kurwin and Traegar were dead?"

The rat swallowed hard and smiled meekly. "I-I was--I-I meant ta say Muslar! Yes, yes--I, err, I-I--"

"So yer sayin' you killed Muslar instead of Kurwin and Traegar?"

"NO! Yore jus' twistin' me words around!"

More beasts began to crowd around Dirtfoot. The chubby beast kept backing away until he looked out the corner of his left eye and saw Glud leaning against a tree.

"Wot the fuck did ye do?" the rat snarled.

Glud smirked at the rodent and shook his head. "Nothin'. Nothin' wotsoever."

Dirtfoot swallowed again and kept backing away. "There's a perfectly good reason fer alla this--"

"Then by all means, please explain, Dirtfoot!"

Dirtfoot's heart went cold after hearing the booming voice behind him. The rat turned around slowly and froze when he saw the scarred ferret walking towards him. Kurwin the Flayer approached the rat with his trademark grin on his face as he reached for his hatchet.

"We're all just dyin' to know the details."

Dirtfoot couldn't breathe. He couldn't think properly. All around him were beasts staring and scowling at him, trying to comprehend what he just said. Behind him was an ally who stabbed him in the back and failed to complete his task. And to his right was his foe, alive and well, and looking like he wanted to peel the flesh off his bones. He was trapped.

"Shit," Dirtfoot squeaked.