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LAST TIME ON OH, COLLEGE: Do you enjoy lunch? Less people agree with you now.

Albus and Dev walked out of the cafeteria, Albus walking just in front of Dev, who placed both his hands on Albus's ass. "Aren't you supposed to ask first?" Albus inquired. "Are you complaining?" "Never mind, then." "By the way, how do you feel about dressing up like a cheerleader while we fuck?" Albus had this face O_O on him for a moment, before blushing with a wide grin and saying "Please tell me you're not circumcised." "No, and circumcision is disgusting!" "YOU ARE DEFINITELY A KEEPER, DEV!" Then everyone in the hallway looked at them all judgmental-like, with faces that were half-confused, half-judgmental scowls.

"Wait. Where the fuck would you get a cheerleader's uniform?" "I just have one in my dorm in case of..." Dev paused for a moment. "Special guests, like the ones that visited me last semester. There was this one guy who straight-up fingered his asshole right in front of...me...You know, this is why I fucking hate you people. It should be clearly established by now that I'm fucking bisexual and I like to fuck cross-dressers, so why are you acting like this is anything new?" Then some random Owl bloke pointed out that it's because he was sharing some rather...douchebag's latest social media post-worthy details, sort of like pictures of your food, only less fucking pointless because people might WANT to visualize what you're posting about, beyond the people who get off to Youtube videos of attractive people eating. I'm into food play to the point where it's my own weird fetish (in theory), and I don't fucking get it. WRITER'S NOTE: I don't get what happened here. I thought, when I started writing, and no, I am NOT shitting you, that I had no material to work with, but every time, the words just flow forth from my brain like I already knew what the fuck to write about beyond just a concept. BACK TO THE STORY.

Then, they made their way out of the building where all their classes and the cafeteria reside. As soon as they walked outside, some Bull bloke in a football uniform shouted at Dev "NICE ONE! You know how slutty femboys can be, right?" Then Albus yelled back "I hope that I can act all slutty, but I'm worried about how my inhibitions might kick in when I stop fantasizing and start doing those things IRL! Also, I'm not a femboy, but I'm like half-femboy! I like action movies and aggressive music-like dubstep and glitch hop and metal and shit-and shooters and hack-and-slash and beat-em-up games, but I also write romantic poetry and stories, dress in drag for fun sometimes, and I can really get emotional, and I get scared when I watch horror movies, as in really scared!" Then the Bull facepalmed and walked away.

Then Jesha walked up to them and asked "Do you mind if I join you two? I can tell by the way that Albus seems to have been hypnotized by my tits, which are NOT FUCKING FAKE, SO STOP ASSUMING, that he's all for it" "Sure" Dev replied. She started walking with them and asked Albus "By the way, you actually get off to being treated the way I treated you now, don't you? I've read some of your articles on sexual psychology, because I want to pass the class, NOT BECAUSE I'M SOME KIND OF GEEK, and-" He interrupted by saying "A: oh, so you DO know about capture-bonding and the way it perfectly explains sadomasochism AND bondage fetishism, but also Stockholm syndrome, but that's unrelated, but that it for what you will. B: do you seriously think that, in a society like this, people will like you LESS if you're all nerdy? It's actually kind of a turn-on for me, but then there's how much of a bitchtits you were to me." Eventually, they got to the dorm building.

Jesha then said "By the way, I don't suck off anyone with foreskin", at which point Dev turned her in the direction opposite the one they were going, and gave her a little shove. "Please never even ask me for sex again. Also, you're seriously going to support a practice like THAT for your own little fetish, aren't you? Do I even-" "You're going to go off on another anti-circumcision tirade like I even care about how other people feel, aren't you? Just for your own sake, don't assume that I do." Albus then proceeded to say "Great. Now you look super-fucking-ugly to me, because you're even WORSE than you were last time I saw you", before trying to slap her, before Dev stopped him and said "Remember that one double standard that you have to worry about concerning men slapping women versus vice versa. Wow, that's really fun to say. Versus vice versa versus vice versa. I think they have the same root word."

"Ohhh FUCKING HELL THAT'S STILL A THING IN THIS DAY AND AGE!? Let me guess: the OTHER sexist double standard's still a thing, too? Where a dude who sleeps with a lot of chicks is a player, but when it's the other way around, she's a slut? FUCKING GENDER POLITICS ARE SO BULLSHIT TO THIS VERY DAY THAT-" and then Dev grabbed Albus's ass really tight again, and he stopped yelling and had this face ^_^, but with blushing, and a lot of it, and quite the nose-bleed. "You know, I can feel you boner grind up against my asshole as we walk, though I'm not complaining in the slightest, so never fucking mind." "It's nice to hear that you noticed but don't really have any issue with that." Then, they got to the dorm room.

"Where's the cheerleader's uniform?" Albus asked as Dev took his shirt off, revealing the kind of muscles that the next story will tell you about. Keep waiting. Dev unpacked it from his suitcase, as Albus then put it on, getting on the bed on all fours, shaking his ass and moaning a little bit. "You're just acting like this because...why are you acting like this?" "Wait. It's not normal for me to act like this before sex, and I'm supposed to give a shit?" "No, unless you're a pornstar or sex worker or someone with a really great sex life, and you ARE supposed to give a shit." "Why must I care" "It's just a social thing."

"That's never influenced how I behave before. If people are such fucking wankers that I have to change who I am or pretend to be something I'm not to get their approval, then why would I want the approval of such shitfuckers in the first place? Why do normal people always seem to conform just to please people that aren't real friends anyways? Normal people are weird." "Another thing, Albus. I'm not sure what to say about your dick. One the one hand, by the standards of people like me, it's a micro-dick. On the other, by realistic standards, it's, well, a nice size." "I'm not sure how to respond to that, so I'll just close my eyes and open my mouth now." And then he did. "So, we're going for a blowjob first? As in, you don't want anal as much, even with a reach-around?" "I don't know why, but the thing about most of my sexuality is that I don't really want to know nearly anything about the reasons behind it, but I research them anyways out of morbid curiosity and a near-addiction to learning new things." "Let's just get on with it now" Dev said, and then they got on with it.

NEXT TIME ON OH, COLLEGE: They get on with it. Plain and simple. Also, piss-drinking, because if you read the naughty parts, then you're going to encounter the kind of shit that I get off to. Just a fore-warning that I also kind of put in Just Once.