Gortoz 'A Ran - CH 100 - A lifetime ago...

Story by MrGimp21 on SoFurry

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#101 of Gortoz 'A Ran


On a Friday, early in the afternoon, I came home from college and went to see my grandmother. She was going to celebrate her eighty fifth birthday that weekend and seeing as I came home early, I went out to help with the groceries and around the house with the cooking and cleaning. At around two PM, we came home and unloaded the groceries from my car. She expected many people coming over so she had a lot of groceries... Needless to say, the bags didn't carry themselves inside the house on their own so I had to make a few trips back and forth. Can't let an old woman carry all those heavy bags, can I? Anyway, once all those bags got placed on the kitchen table, we started to unpack them and stored everything in the right place. And after we had a small tea break, we started to clean the place up. I vacuumed while she was busy in the kitchen doing the dishes. And by the time I was done, she already started to dust off in the living room. I offered to wash the windows for her so I got myself a bucket of warm water with soap detergent, a sponge and a squeegee. Even though I'm quite tall for a female, I wasn't tall enough to reach the top. My grandmother said she had a household ladder in the attic so I went upstairs to get it...

The steep wooden staircase cracked and squeaked as I carefully made my way up the attic. The musty scent of dust penetrated my nostrils once I got there. The small roof window illuminated the attic but it wasn't enough for me to see clearly. Once I turned on the light, I saw a lot of stuff, things you'd expect in an attic... An old dusty chair, lots of suitcases and boxes, old junk, books... Looking to my right, I could see a box full of old toys my cousins and I used to play with whenever we stayed over back when we were little... Looking at the box, I saw something familiar sticking out... It was an old game my grandmother and I used to play a lot back then... It's called Tell Me Quiz... I couldn't help to smile when I saw that... It's a game where you spin a dial and it ends on a letter, after which, you had to pick a card where you had to name something starting with that letter... For example, to name a city that starts with an S... It all came back to me when I opened the box and shuffled through the cards... The game itself was very old but despite that, it was still in good shape... I spun the dial as I read the first question and the letter I got was an A... "Name a flower"... "Ass-flower... Hihi..." Not exactly correct and corresponding to the question but I guess that just shows my weird sense of humor... I placed it back in the box and I saw other things we used to play with... An old wooden train set, a case of Matchbox cars and a very old play cash register... Hehe... I remember I used to "sell" those Matchbox cars to my cousins, usually for Monopoly money but I also remember I charged jellybeans whenever they didn't have the cash... Good times... Looking at it again made me wonder where the time has gone... Those fourteen years went by in a blink of an eye...

The box of toys got carefully moved aside by me to make room once I saw the household ladder. I made my way towards it and had to move some other boxes aside as well to clear the way. But I wasn't careful enough when I picked it up... As I held the ladder and turned around to make my way back, I accidentally knocked over a chest and as it fell on the ground, the lid popped open... And that's when I literally saw hundreds of old letters... I quickly put the ladder down and picked up those letters to put them back in the chest... Curiosity got the better of me and I couldn't help to wonder what those letters were, since there were so many of them... So I carefully unfolded a letter and I saw the date...

"21st of December, 1939..."

It was a small letter, written in Daijirian during the war, addressed to my grandmother... And even though it's a different dialect than Urdu, I could still read it fairly well... So I started reading...

"My dearest Anaya,

I dare to say that you made me learn how to dream. Perhaps some will look at me and see nothing but a foolish dreamer when everyone told us that we were not meant to be. We stayed strong and today we can stand up to everyone, for we proved them wrong. There isn't a moment that goes by without you gracing my memory. And for that, I know that some dreams are actually a reality. We've seen how our world crumbled with our very own eyes and suffer the perils that the war brought to us. But we endure all its hardships and I am glad that here, in such a world, you learned me to dream beautiful.

At night, I lie down and imagine you are here with me. I didn't know just how heavy this separation would be on my heart. I hope you are not in as much utter misery as I am without you. They say absence makes the heart grow fonder yet my love for you has no bounds.

The days that we have spent with each other have instilled a new bright life in me. Your love, your compassionate way of caring for me has made me fall in love with you. You alone make my life worth living. When I think of your voice, my heart stops. There is no mountain that can reach higher than my love for you. No river is deeper then the deepest of my love. It stretches for more miles than any ocean can stretch. It is the kind of love of which people can only dream about. All the money in the world or all the joy in the world would never be more important to me than you. You are my life, my soul, my love, my everything.

I love you.

Forever yours,

Rama"

I never knew him... He passed away long before I was even born... But if he was here today, I would've called him my grandfather... It's strange how my grandmother never referred him to me as "my grandfather" whenever she talked to me about him... It was always "her husband" instead... Perhaps that had something to do with the fact I never considered Simon and Catherine as "my parents"... Calling Simon and Catherine "my parents" never felt right, as if they could ever replace my own... Perhaps she always knew family was a touchy subject for me... It's complicated, I know... Still... Even though they are not my real parents or relatives, I can honestly say that I am very thankful that they were still willing to be... Calling her "my grandmother" simply showed how much she meant to me...

I kept staring at the letter for a while... I thought it was beautiful and oh so sweet... But I wasn't realizing that it didn't exactly go unnoticed when that chest fell on the wooden floor... And I was very startled when I heard her voice... I was too busy reading the letter to have heard her coming up the stairs...

'Is everything alright, dear?'

I looked up and faced my grandmother, who was standing on the staircase and saw I was reading that letter... My grandmother carefully made her way towards me and looked down on the letter that I was holding... When she looked at me, she seemed a little distraught... No one likes it when they're snooping around personal belongings... I wouldn't like it too if someone were to read my diary...

'O-Oh, uhm... I-I'm sorry, I accidentally knocked the chest over and uhm... I-I didn't mean to, I'm so sorry... I shouldn't have read it...'

She didn't say anything after that... My grandmother carefully took the letter from my hands and read it as it stayed quiet for a long time... She had a weak smile on her face when she faced me...

'Nana...?'

'He wrote that letter to me, four years after the occupation by the Imperial forces during the war...'

'Heh...'

'I often told him how much of a fool he was, for putting himself in danger like that but he never listened...'

'Putting himself in danger...? Why's that...?'

'Citizens were prohibited from sending letters and were cut off from any form of communication during the war. Even something as simple like a love letter could contain a secret message that could undermine the occupational forces...'

'Oh...'

'But that never stopped him... He put himself in an awful lot of danger by delivering his letters to my home... In the backyard, hidden in the hen-house under a loose floorboard, second from the right on entry... He risked his life by breaking curfew set by the Kempeitai...'

'Kempeitai?'

'The military secret police...'

'It showed just how much he loved you if he took such risks...'

'Yes, kitten... It really does...'

She folded the letter as I quickly set the chest up right again... My grandmother looked at the letter one last time before folding it up and gently placing it back in the chest, sighing quietly...

'I'm so sorry... I should've known better than to read it...'

'It's alright, dear...'

'Heh... Are, uhm... Are all of these letters from him...?'

'Yes, every single one of them... These letters were the only way for us to keep in touch...'

'Why's that...?'

'Not everyone liked the idea of us seeing each other...'

'Really...? I-I mean... You married him, didn't you...?'

'I did, yes...'

'So... How did you still manage to...?'

The moment I asked that, my grandmother smiled and carefully let herself down on the old dusty chair... Taking her glasses off, she wiped them clean and she faced me once she put them back on again... I sat down on the floor and just listened to her...

'Rama came from a noble family where my mother was working as a housemaid. I started working as a housemaid as well when I was twelve years old and that's when I first met him. We became close friends during our youth, even though his parents did not like it. A noble family doesn't mingle with commoners, you see.'

'Something like a social status kind of thing?'

'Yes. As the years passed by, Rama and I fell in love with each other even though Rama was to be married with a woman from another noble family. But then the war broke out... A colonel of the Imperial Army commandeered the estate where I was working at to form a headquarter. In the beginning, we noticed little of the war... And life continued relatively normal for us... The war and those who were against our love didn't stop us from seeing each other, much to his parents disapproval. He proposed to marry me, when I was twenty one years old but needless to say, we didn't receive our parents blessings... And we were not allowed to see each other ever again... My mother and I were relieved of our duties and we were prohibited from entering the estate again...'

'So you had to find a different way to keep in touch...'

'Yes... We secretly met each other at night, where we could be together... It was dangerous to break curfew... Anyone who was found after curfew who was not in uniform, were either shot on sight or arrested... Security was tightened when an Imperial lieutenant was assassinated by a resistance fighter... It became too dangerous for us to meet at night once the Kempeitai was in charge of security...'

'Hence the letters...'

'Yes... During the day, we secretly met to hide from our parents and by night, we hid from the Kempeitai... As if no one wanted us to be together... So we left letters addressed to each other underneath a loose floorboard of the hen-house in my backyard where I left poems for him... Each night, he came, placed his letter there and took my poem with him... That's how we stayed in touch for about a year... And even though the letters were comforting, we couldn't stand the thought of being separated and missed each other more and more as each day passed by...'

'I can imagine...'

'One night, he came to my house and threw little pebbles at the window of my bedroom to attract my attention... I sneaked outside and after a lovable embrace, he told me he wanted to elope with me... To run away from all the secrecy, where we could spend our lives together with no one to hold us back...'

'Did you...?'

'Yes... The following night, we took a few belongings with us and ran away from our parents... But the war was everywhere... We were so young and so naive to think we could run away from it...'

'Where'd you go...?'

'We had nowhere to go... But we thought we'd be fine as long as we could be together... The further we traveled, the more gruesome reality became... There was little to no food and we often stayed the night in collapsed buildings... Sometimes we had to sleep in the open fields... And sometimes, we were lucky enough to be taken in by a family, to stay for the night...'

'Wow...'

'Rama and I got married on the seventh of July in nineteen forty three... In a half-demolished church where a priest was taking our vows... Only a handful of strangers attended, who could use something uplifting to forget about their own worries, if only for a short time... But times were tough for everyone... I wanted to be with him but not like this... I often lost hope... And at times like that, he wrote... He gave me a letter which contained his words of hope...'

'Is that why there are so many letters...?'

'Yes...'

I stared at a bundle and I noticed that a lot of letters weren't written on a piece of paper... Some of them were written on a napkin or a piece of toilette paper... Most of these were in bad shape but nevertheless, she still kept it... I even noticed a letter that had an official Imperial military logo on the top right corner... I supposed paper wasn't always easy to get your hands on back then...

'After the war was over, we returned to our families... We hardly recognized the place we used to call home... My parents and my two brothers lost their lives during an Allied bombing raid... Only my sister survived...'

'Oh...'

'Rama's father was executed as retaliation, for undermining the Imperial authority... We never knew why, but we heard rumors that he was involved with the resistance... Seeing as there was a headquarter formed at their estate and a colonel was stationed there, he was able to pass on information... By the time we came back, his entire family was arrested and sent to labor camps... They were never seen again...'

I expected my grandmother to continue her story but she stayed silent after that... Never before has she ever mentioned the war... It was the only time in my life where she briefly mentioned it but never went in to detail... And I can tell from her eyes that she has seen so many things no person should ever witness... I can only imagine the things she must've gone through... For a moment, there was an empty gaze in her eyes... But as soon as I placed my hands on hers, she looked at me and everything was alright again when she smiled at me... She picked up another letter from the floor and started to read it... And after she was done, she folded it and placed it in the chest... She picked up another letter and started to read it but after a while, I could hear her giggle quietly... Once again, she folded it and placed it back in the chest... When my grandmother stared at all the letters that were addressed to her, she got a little emotional...

'He never stopped writing you, did he...?'

'No, dear... Years after the war ended, we kept writing each other. I often woke up and found a letter addressed to me next to my pillow. Sometimes, he came home from work and brought me a bouquet of roses along with his own letter. We used to write each other to stay in touch but it became so much more than that, kitten...'

'Expression of your love for each other...'

'Yes... The years that followed once the war ended were tough for the both of us... We lost so many and we had to pick up our lives again... But it's his words and unconditional love for me that kept me going...'

'Is that how you were able to move on...? After everything you've been through...?'

'Yes... Even though sometimes it's hard to let go...'

'Heh...'

'But at some point in your life, you'll have to... Because you can either feel sorrowful over the things you've lost... Or you can rejoice over the things you still have left...'

'It's a matter of perspective...'

'Indeed...'

'Even when it's not much...?'

'It makes you appreciate everything you've still got, even though it may be very little... All the more reason to go out and find it for yourself...'

'Is that why you came to Renaria...?'

'Hm-mm... We started a new life here... There was nothing left for us in Daijiru... But we never forgot the things we've lost... I never forgot the ones I've loved and lost...'

She closed her eyes for a moment and sighed quietly... When she opened them again, she kept staring at a defective grandfather clock to her right... She just kept staring at it for a long time...

'You miss him, don't you...?'

'More and more as each day that goes by, kitten... It's been thirty seven years since he passed away... And I just wonder where the time has gone...'

'Heh...'

'Sometimes at night, I can still feel his strong arm around me... Like he never left... As if he's still watching over me...'

'He still does...'

'I know, dear...'

My grandmother and I started to put all those letters back in the chest... Every once in a while, she opened one and started to read... And every time she did, I could see that she got lost in her thoughts... Sometimes she smiled whenever she was reading... Sometimes she was on the brink of breaking down in tears... These letters meant the world to her... At some point, she unfolded a letter and an old photograph fell out... My grandmother picked it up and seemed very surprised when she looked at it... But then she just smiled... Once I looked at her, she showed me the photograph... An old black and white photo, with my grandmother, her husband and three of their children in front of their house... The oldest looking cub of the bunch looked like ten years old... The second cub looked about eight years old and the little cub my grandmother was holding couldn't have been older than four... "Uncle Jacob, uncle Anthony and uncle Joseph..." Seemed logical, seeing as they were the oldest... All of them Ashera's, standing in a garden... My grandmother was wearing a dress and her husband wore a tuxedo... The black and white photo didn't picture their tawny gold colored fur but their black spots were clearly visible... My grandmother looked absolutely beautiful... Being ever so curious, I wanted to know the story behind it...

'Where was that picture taken?'

'Right here, in the front yard, kitten. Don't you recognize the house?'

'Oh, I see. It looks so much different.'

'This house has seen many changes over the years.'

'So who took this picture?'

'Mister McKenzie did, our old next door neighbor. He had a new camera which he wanted to try out.'

I took a look at the back of the photograph and noticed someone scribbled down a date...

"July 7 __th_ , 1956"_

'This picture was taken on your anniversary...'

'Indeed... We never had any photographs of our wedding... Mister McKenzie shot a few photos for us so that we had something to look back to...'

'Heh...'

My grandmother read the letter where the photograph fell out from and I've never seen so many emotions going through someone... It's like she had really mixed feelings about seeing all these letters... Part of her felt happy that they have spent their lives together after all the hardships they've been through... Part of her felt sad that she's been living on without him for thirty seven years... I can't imagine how that must feel like... To lose someone you love so early in your life and live on... She's always been such a strong woman... She had to... Some people grow a heart of stone because of it... But not her... She touched his face on the photograph as a tear rolled down her cheek... It was a rare thing for me to see her sad...

'You've still got us... All of us... I don't want you to feel sad, nana...'

'Reminiscing the past can do that to you sometimes, dear...'

'I know...'

My grandmother looked down at me and smiled as she stroked her hand through my hair... She always did that ever since I was little... I got up from the floor and sat on the arm-rest as I gave her a big firm hug and a kiss on her forehead... It's moments like these I cherish the most... Even though my grandmother and I share totally different stories, we could still relate to each other... That's one of the reasons why I was so close with her... It's one of the reasons why she meant the world to me...

'Rama once told me that we had a new life here... But I sensed doubt in his voice the day he told me that... I think that neither of us were ever able to let go of our old one when we started a new life here... These pictures and letters reminded us of our new life and what we've had together...'

'Were you afraid...?'

'At times, yes... But we sticked together... Lived our lives as best we could... I gave birth to seven beautiful children... I've seen my grandchildren grow up... A mother could not wish for anything more...'

'Heh...'

'Feeling sorrowful over things you've lost doesn't necessarily have to be a bad thing, kitten... It only makes you cherish the things you still have... '

'I guess so...'

'I know so, dear... I just wish he would've lived long enough to see this day...'

My grandmother stared at the photograph she was holding and I could hear her sigh quietly as she thought things over... All of a sudden, she didn't seem to be that sad anymore... The moment she faced me, she stared directly in my eyes... I understood the message she tried to bring across... Sometimes, I couldn't help to feel that she saw a part of her in me... As if I reminded her of herself... There's this connection I have with her that I just can't explain... It feels familiar, as if it's always been there... Being with her felt like I was home... A place where I belonged, somewhere I mattered... And somehow, one way or another, she always knew... My grandmother was right... It's a matter of perspective... When I looked at her, everything was clear, everything seemed to make sense... I smiled at her and gave her another big firm cuddle and a kiss on her cheek...

Once all the letters were put back into the chest, I quickly made my way downstairs with the ladder so that we could continue our chores. But once I got down on the second floor, I noticed my grandmother was still at the top, holding on to the railing and carefully made her way down. She wasn't as fast and agile as she once used to be... So I quickly made my way up again and took her hand to help get down the stairs... She was still holding on that photograph she found in the chest but I took it from her and I carefully walked backwards down the stairs in order to help her down. It took a while before we reached the first floor but once we did, I quickly ran up the stairs again to get that ladder and well... Going up and down the stairs several times wore me out a bit... Once I got back in the living-room, I stood there for a moment with the ladder when I noticed my grandmother sitting on the couch, looking at her mantelpiece above her fireplace where several picture frames were standing on... She has a lot pictures of her grandchildren, her children, family and relatives but the pictures she kept on her mantelpiece was dedicated to only one person... And she just kept staring at them for a while...

I've seen those pictures countless of times... It's hard to miss when you set foot in her living-room... But I guess that's always been the idea... It makes him still a part of her life... She had a few pictures of her husband on her mantelpiece... Pictures from where he was young, playing with his children or working in the garden... Pictures that seem so normal to have in any regular family household... It just goes to show that every one of those pictures has a story to tell... Whenever you asked my grandmother to tell a story, she always had something to tell... Always smiling and laughing whenever she was telling one... And right now, when I think about it... She wasn't lying when she said she lived her life as best she could...

'Nana...?'

'Yes, dear...?'

'Would you like to frame that picture and place it on the mantelpiece next to the others...?'

'That would be wonderful, kitten... I'm not sure if I have a picture frame left for it.'

'Want me to take a look?'

'In the dresser behind the dining table, there is a box with photo-albums on the lower left shelf. Perhaps there may be one left.'

'Sure thing.'

I went over to the dresser and there was the box of photo-albums like she said. I couldn't find a picture frame so I just took out the box and hauled it over to the couch so that we could have a closer look. I moved the coffee table away from the couch to make room and placed the box in front of the couch. Once the lid was popped, we took out the photo-albums one by one but there were no picture frames inside...

'I thought I still had some left.'

'Don't worry, I think I still got a few at home. I'll bring one over tomorrow.'

'That would be wonderful, dear. Thank you.'

'Why don't we place this picture in a photo-album to keep it safe in the meantime? Then we can frame it in tomorrow.'

I randomly picked a photo-album and flipped through its pages to see if there was an empty spot to put it in. It had so many pictures... Birthdays, holidays, anniversaries... Pictures of my aunts and uncles from when they were younger... All of a sudden, I saw a picture of a young tigress, looking ever so anxious... Holding a small pink suitcase with Simon and Catherine behind her... I got kind of startled when I saw that...

'That's me...'

'Yes, that's you, dear...'

'Wow, uhm...'

'It's the day we welcomed you in our family...'

'Heh... It's only been fourteen years ago but it feels like an entire lifetime to me...'

'It does, doesn't it...?'

I remember seeing them for the first time... A whole new family to call my own the day they picked me up from the airport... Part of me felt happy, part of me felt anxious... To me, they were all strangers...

Months before that, I was in an orphanage in Daijiru, two years after the war in Salahadihn was over... Everything that made me be myself was lost during the war by losing everything I had... I even lost myself... Just an empty shell of a kid, looking for a reason to exist... And then one day, someone came for me... Two of them, to be precise... A male and a female, who looked so much different than everyone else there... They were felines but they weren't tigers, unlike me... I was playing by myself with some toys in the recreational room when one of the caretakers showed them in... They introduced themselves as Simon and Catherine when they sat down with me to have a talk... They seemed nice, even though the language barrier was a bit of a problem... My Renarian wasn't that great at the time mainly due to my heavy accent which often got misinterpreted... I haven't said much the first day I met them... They only came to see me for about an hour and by the time they left, I thought I'd never see them again... Imagine my surprise when they came back the next day, just to sit down and talk with me again... For two weeks, they came to see me, staying longer with each day that passed by... Every day, I was looking forward to their visit... Being ever so curious, I started to ask them questions like where they came from, how they lived their lives and what the weather was like... And after two weeks, one of the caretakers accompanied Simon and Catherine when they asked me if I wanted to live with them... To adopt me...They would take care of me if I did... I didn't know what it did to me... I actually started crying when they asked me that... To me, it felt like I mattered again, that I wasn't forgotten... Of course, I didn't know at the time that Simon and Catherine were thoroughly screened and had to arrange a whole lot of things before they even got to meet me but they were eligible to take me home with them if I wanted to... When I looked at the caretaker who's always been there for me said that I was old enough to decide to, I honestly had no idea what to say... It seemed scary to leave everything I knew behind once more... The answer to that question would change my life but I wasn't realizing it back then... I was only nine years old at the time... But every time they left, I missed them... Some of my friends were adopted and lived a better life somewhere else, never to be seen again... I was scared, anxious... But also happy that they asked me that... I drew them pictures and started to imagine what it must've been like if I went home with them...

The day I told them I wanted to go home with them, I didn't expect my answer to have such an impact on the two of them... Their eyes told me a lot, they were so overwhelmed with happiness... Something got sparked deep inside of me that day that I haven't felt for so long... It gave me hope... While it took another week before I left the orphanage for good, Simon and Catherine made the final preparations for me to go home with them... The few belongings I had left, was taken with me in a small pink suitcase littered with fairy tale stickers... Perhaps that's why pink is my favorite color... The taxi took the three of us to the airport and we boarded an airplane for the twelve hour flight to Renaria... During that flight, it was the first time I fell asleep while sitting on Catherine's lap as she held me close... Something about it just felt so familiar... It was the way she held me, caressing my forehead, just like my mother used to do... There was a certain click the day I first met them... A click of which I cannot explain... But up to this day, it's something I'm very grateful for...

When we arrived at Northcrest International Airport in the middle of the night, I felt drowsy from the long flight and as soon as we got our luggage, we made our way to the arrival terminal where a whole bunch of people were waiting for us... All of them bringing gifts, holding banners and balloons... As soon as we saw them, they started cheering and embraced Simon and Catherine and they all seemed particularly interested in me... I was overwhelmed and had no idea what was happening... All of a sudden, I was wide awake when I saw all those people who were eager to meet me... Of course, I was shy and a bit scared when an old woman approached me... Looking at me, she said_"Dach'yud bachran",_ which means "welcome home"... I didn't know what to say... I was eleven thousand kilometers away from home and here was a woman who was born and raised in Daijiru... What were the odds...? The old woman kneeled in front of me and gave me a rabbit plushie, saying that his name was mister Puffles and that he'd like to welcome me as well... I hesitated for a moment to take it... I wasn't used to any of this, not anymore... But the moment I took mister Puffles from her, my grandmother gently embraced me... I didn't know why these people were so happy to have me and why they were all so eager for my arrival... But they were and it meant more than the world to me... Closing my eyes and holding them felt familiar... I was finally home...

Things haven't always been that easy... Settling in was one of the most difficult things I ever had to go through as a young cub... Sometimes I cried in bed at night when I woke up from a bad dream... Sometimes I cried simply because I was homesick... But I often cried because I missed my parents and my own family... Those who didn't came with me... Simon and Catherine knew my background and what I've been through but I hardly ever talked to them about it... Things weren't easy for me but it wasn't easy for them as well... I didn't always treated them fairly as I grew up, much to my own shame... Nevertheless, Simon and Catherine took me in their home when no one else did... Their unconditional love gave me something no one else could ever give me... They gave me a second chance... And even though I never managed to call them my parents, I was ever so grateful that they were still willing to be...

As I flipped the pages, I noticed a lot more pictures of me from when I was younger... One of those pictures depicted me blowing out ten candles on a cake, wearing a silly party-hat... My cousins sat around the table but right next to me was Blain... And it's exactly how I remembered him to be...

'Hehe... I can't remember I ever saw these picture before...'

'Your tenth birthday... It was celebrated right here.'

'Look at Blain, he's so adorable...'

'You two have always been inseparable ever since.'

'Other boys teased him because his best friend was a girl...'

'He followed you wherever you went...'

'He still does...'

As I flipped the pages, I noticed more pictures of me... Pictures taken on a normal Saturday night, spending time with the family... Going for a walk through the woods... Feeding the ducks with my grandmother at the park... Swimming... Going to the beach... Blain also made an appearance on most of these pictures... Like my grandmother said, he followed me wherever I went... Mostly because I always insisted that he came along whenever we were going somewhere... And because of that, my family got to know him ever since and over the years, Blain and his family became regular guests at my grandmother's house... My grandmother grew very fond of him as well and sometimes, I couldn't help to think that she considered him like a grandson... He was always welcome...

'Awwww, would you look at that, kitten...'

'Hehe...'

'The two of you look so adorable, holding hands like that...'

'Hm...'

'Whenever someone teased you about being in love with each other, both of you always denied.'

Blain always thought that girls were stupid except for me because I didn't behave like one. But I occasionally act like a lady nowadays... My grandmother smiled at me and once she turned another page, I saw pictures that were taken during Christmas. My cousins and I unwrapping presents and looking ever so happy... Sitting on the couch with cups of hot chocolate... Playing outside in the snow... I wasn't used to the cold... Even now, years later, I'm still not used to it... I didn't even know what snow was supposed to be like until I got here... Lakes were frozen over and you could actually walk on it... It all seemed very strange to me... The day I saw snow for the very first time, I thought to myself that it was very beautiful... But as soon as I set foot outside, I received a snowball straight in my face while Blain was laughing his ass off because of my reaction... He kept throwing snowballs at me while I ran away from him. At some point, he stopped and wondered why I didn't throw back at him... It wouldn't be a snowball fight if I didn't... It confused me, why the hell would anyone throw snow at someone? Apparently, it was supposed to be fun. Blain showed me how to make a snowball by patting a ball in his hands... After he showed me his snowball, he immediately planted it in my face and ran away laughing... Scooping up a bit of snow, I made a ball out of it and threw it in his direction... To my surprise, it actually hit him on the back of his head and the cold snow was dripping down his neck as he shrieked his lungs out... Blain was right, it really was fun...

There were quite a few pictures of her grandchildren during Christmas. But I just never understood the concept of Christmas. They explained to me that some jolly old fat guy with a beard would bring presents to kids who have been good that year. Why would he do that? Also, why would anyone chop down a tree to set it up at home? Who in their right minds would bring a tree into their house to have it decorated? It didn't make much sense to me, seeing as I never heard of it... Decorating the tree with Simon and Catherine was a lot of fun though... Neverthelees, I was skeptic about the guy bringing me presents... Imagine my surprise when there actually were presents underneath the tree on Christmas morning... How did he do that, how the hell did he get into the house...? There were quite a few presents for me underneath the tree and I couldn't help to wonder why Simon and Catherine had significantly less presents than me... I had no idea why anyone would do such a thing... Nevertheless, I was happy that he did... It wasn't until several years later when I learned that Santa Clause wasn't real and that it had been Simon and Catherine all along...

'Seeing these pictures make it seem like it's a lifetime ago, nana...'

'Indeed...'

'Where did the time go...?'

'I was wondering that myself, dear...'

'Heh...'

'Eighty five years is an entire lifetime but these years passed by in a blink of an eye... Life has it's ups and downs, kitten... No one can change that... What matters is what you do with the time that has been given to you...'

'No one gets the equal amount of time...'

'Sadly, no... Some pass away from this world long before they are supposed to... But that doesn't mean they haven't lived a good life...'

'Heh...'

'Because in the end, to have lived a good life is all that matters...'

My grandmother and I kept watching photo-albums together for the rest of the afternoon... Every photograph she kept in there told a story... A story she was very keen on sharing with me... I can't imagine all the things she's been through in her life but it's safe to say that she lived her life as best she could... Even though her husband died thirty seven years ago, she kept on going because she knows that is what her husband would've wanted her to do... It really showed... The pictures in her photo-albums said enough... The day they took me in and accepted me as family is something I can't explain, even now, many years later... I became part of a loving family again... No one is supposed to go on alone... And my grandmother knew that better than anyone...

At around six PM, we both heard the doorbell ringing and I noticed Blain standing outside. I forgot that he was supposed to pick me up, seeing as we'd go to the movies later on... The moment I opened the door, Blain was being his enthusiastic self again... My grandmother carefully shuffled her way to the hallway to greet him... Once she got there, she greeted him with a smile and the two of them were giving each other a big firm hug... Also, I should mention that my grandmother is the only one who refers him by his real name... Blain also refers my grandmother as "nana" because as gullible as he once was, he actually used to believe that it was her name. It kinda got stuck with him over the years so he kept calling her that... My grandmother didn't seem to mind, she thought it was wonderful...

'Oh Dominic, it's so good to see you again, dear... It's been too long...'

'Hello, misses Jaisyaram, how are you?'

'All is fine... Please, please, come in! Would you like something to drink?'

'No, thank you, nana...'

'Ceylan told me you two youngsters are off to the cinema?'

'Yeah, movie starts at half passed six.'

'Well then, you two should be going otherwise you'll be late!'

'We haven't done much around the house, nana...'

'It's alright dear, we've done enough for today. Aunt Isabelle will come tomorrow to help with the rest.'

'I'll come by early tomorrow morning to help you wash the windows, alright...?'

'There's an easier way, dear.'

'Oh?'

'Yes, simply keep the blinds closed and nobody will notice they're dirty! Hihihi...'

'Hehehe, that's one way.'

'Dominic, you and your parents will come tomorrow as well, right?'

'Of course, wouldn't want to miss it!'

'Wonderful! Now off you go, otherwise you'll be late for the movie!'

'Alright... Bye, nana, see you tomorrow...'

'Bye misses Jaisyaram.'

My grandmother gave Blain and I a smooch on the cheek and gave us a firm cuddle as we stood in the doorway... After which, she shuffled back in the kitchen and opened several cupboards in search of something... Blain and I were watching when she quietly mumbled that she couldn't find the kurkuma, which is some kind of spice she used in her dishes... "Same as where you always leave it, nana... Top shelf in the right cupboard..." She's getting too old... Forgetting simple things... One time, she spend an entire evening searching for her glasses while it was on the coffee table and forgot she left it there... Blain and I were looking at each other and I knew we were thinking the same thing... Blain closed the door behind him as I made my way to the kitchen... I opened the right cupboard and my grandmother seemed surprised that we haven't left yet but she smiled at me when I handed her the jar of kurkuma...

'Nana...?'

'Yes, kitten...?'

'We don't necessarily have to go... I mean, we can always go to the movies some other time...'

She kept smiling at us and nodded slowly when I felt she reached out to my hand and gently squeezed in it... After which, she got hold of a frying pan and placed it on the stove...

'Who's hungry...?'

My grandmother whipped up something quick and easy for us to eat... Stir fried rice with marinated chicken, something she made within the hour... And as always, it was absolutely delicious... Blain and I stayed with her that evening where we were watching photo-albums on the couch, reminiscing the past... She had a story to tell with every picture that came by... The way she always told those stories always got us hooked, even though you've already heard it a thousand times... It's the kind of stories you never get tired to hear... Quite often, Blain and I were in stitches because of everything she told... Like Blain buying me a whoopee cushion as a present for my tenth birthday and we were off making fart noises all the time while my grandmother just played along... She didn't care if others thought of her to be immature for an old lady... She had fun in everything she did and that's all that mattered to her...

We can always go to the movies because there will always be a cinema to go to... But there will be a day when my grandmother is not here anymore... And that's why I stayed with her that evening... Simply because it's just another memory to cherish... Of course there will be others to go to... But they're not my grandmother... I just wanted to spend as much time with her as I can... Because like my grandmother said, life goes by in a blink of an eye... Every word you say to your loved ones can be the last thing you'll ever say to them... So make it count... Don't waste those opportunities by saying hurtful things or fight over something stupid and meaningless... Tell them how much you love them and let them know how much they mean to you... Because when you fall down, they're the ones who help you get back up on your feet... It can make all the difference there is to someone... After all, isn't that what living a good life is all about...?