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"I didn't want you to go to any trouble."

"Stop being silly."

Jerry watched as the younger of his landlords continued to straighten up the living room of the big house, waiting for the auto-set electric kettle to chime its announcement that the water had reached the correct temperature for the blackberry rooibos and lemongrass tea that he had selected for the afternoon's meeting. The otter looked on as the flit-wolf virtually danced about the room, his snowy wings furled and close to his dark brown and sandy-furred body, a gentle smile on his lips as if anticipating some outcome of this interview that Jerry hadn't contemplated.

"If nothing else, you've told me that Benedict will be with him. He might be considered small, compared to some of the eldest dragons we've heard tell of, but he's still well over two meters - not counting his personality." The flit-wolf grinned. "There's more room here than in your apartment."

"He's managed there before, you know."

"Of course, but there's also the question of your private space." Cole paused a moment, his wings shuffling slightly as his lush tail bobbed behind him in an expression of concern. "It's often good to have difficult conversations anywhere other than your home. That gives you a place to retreat to, if you need time and space to think. Besides," he added, his smile returning as he went back to work, "it gives me a good excuse to tidy up a bit. We've been busy with the kits recently."

"I'm sorry, Cole, I didn't know. Is everything all right?"

"Fine, just fine. The usual thing for children at this age - an occasional new tooth causing issues, the learning of words and languages, Paulo literally stretching his wings as they fill in..."

"What about Annabelle?"

"She'll have to show her wings first." Cole glanced over at the young otter. "Like Guy, all flit-tigers of his lineage and breed have their wings hidden at first. One fine day - when she lest expects it, no doubt - she'll pop out her wings, and Guy will teach her. The first lesson is the hardest."

"First flight?"

"No... hiding them!" the flit-wolf laughed. "They're a new toy to play with. Trouble is, if the little one falls asleep with them out, the wings may or may not hide away again. Since they're knew to the kit, she won't know how to handle them well at a subconscious level; she might roll over in sleep and hurt herself. That's one advantage to having them from birth - your body adapts to them being there all the time, and you learn sort of automatically how to move when turning in your sleep. Oh, and clever little Annabelle figured out how to work the lock on the child safety gate that we have on the kits' room. We found her dashing up and down the hallway, looking everywhere and getting into everything."

Jerry couldn't help but laugh. "I could only guess! Was Paulo with her?"

"He was a bit more reluctant to go exploring, it seems, or at least more cautious. He seemed to express more curiosity about the gate itself - the missing barrier. Why had it gone away when Guy and I weren't there?" The flit-wolf smiled a genuinely fatherly smile, his tail wagging slowly, affectionately. "They're both curious, but in different ways. It's ... well, the word 'amazing' springs to mind."

Leaning forward from his seat, the tip of his thick tail thapping the sofa cushion softly, the golden-furred otter asked, "Did you always want to be a father?"

Cole nodded. "I had baby-sitting duties often, during my high school years. Of course, I always provided full disclosure - that I'm gay, not a pederast. Only one couple had reservations, even after checking my references. Badgers seem to live up to that part of their stereotyping. I don't think they were prejudiced, just very protective. They were quite polite, actually; they even put up with some good-natured ribbing from our other neighbors, all in good humor. I actually got to meet the twins, under parental supervision. The parents never quite got over their uncertainty, but they never made a sound about it at block parties and such, when I got a chance to play games with all the kits and pups."

"Who did they finally get to babysit?"

"The mother's brother, who was younger than she and didn't much care for the duty, but he was family." Cole chuckled easily. "He called me over once or twice, when the twins were acting out a bit. It was okay, again because I was supervised, so it all worked out well enough."

Jerry chittered a bit of laughter as he asked, "Did you get paid for those jobs?"

"Better." The flit-wolf made his eyebrows dance. "I got fed! Growing flit-wolves have an appetite."

A grand-sounding peal rang fully and clear from the front hall. Jerry was well aware that those first four notes of the Oxford chime were from real Carillion, struck with padded hammers activated by solenoid relays - no fake electronic noise-makers for Cole and Guy. The flit-wolf checked the clock on the mantelshelf, then his watch. "Quite on time," he observed. "Must be Benedict's insistence. Shall I invite them in?"

The otter tried not to enact too many clichés indicating nervousness, eventually nodding. He'd asked for this, and so had Parker... it was time that they both got on with it.

* * * * * * * * * *

The great crimson dragon stood calmly next to his charge, noting everything while seeming to be almost disinterested in their surroundings. In truth, nothing escaped his notice. It wasn't difficult to know that Parker was agitated - the never-still ears, nervous tail-twitches, the unrelaxed stance. What would be important for Benedict to determine was precisely what it was that the pup was so anxious about. He had clearly brushed his_shimofuri-tora_ brindled fur to a sheen, either from a desire to look his best, or because grooming was one of his nervous habits. Both, perhaps; nothing to say that one can't be mildly neurotic and look good at the same time.

The tall, wide, holly-wreathed front door swung open, revealing the dark brown and beige-furred flit-wolf he'd been talking with at Jerry's homecoming. Cole smiled warmly at them both, his tail wagging. "Welcome," he said with well-mannered enthusiasm, stepping aside to let them enter the high-ceilinged vestibule, closing the door against the December chill. Benedict turned to make the introduction.

"Cole, please meet Zachary Parker. Mr. Parker, this is Colter Dark Claw."

"Call me Cole, please." The flit-wolf extended a forepaw, which Parker shook properly. Benedict noted that the pup was trying very hard not to stare at the full, bright wings. Cole turned to shake the dragon's forepaw as well. "Welcome to our home. Would you care to hang up your coats?" He gestured to a series of decorative hooks on the paneled wall just inside the door. "Jerry is waiting for you, and we should have hot tea available in just a few minutes. This way, when you're ready."

Benedict could see that the word "ready" didn't really describe the athlete all that well at the moment. Dragon and Akita shrugged out of their coats and placed them carefully on the hooks, then they turned to see their host standing near the arched entrance to the living room, one arm extended inward in invitation.

Parker nearly jumped when he looked into the huge, comfortably appointed room. The dragon could understand why. Quite apart from the sheer size and furnishings of the place, a cozy fired burned in the hearth, surrounded by a dark mahogany mantel, polished to glowing from within, the mantelshelf already decorated with two large and two small Christmas stockings, large pillar candles in white, green, and red, and carefully placed trails of holly from end to end. A baby grand piano, also of polished mahogany (at least in color), served as a place to display cards of all sorts and sizes. In the wide bay window nook, a Colorado blue spruce tree fully four meters tall if not a bit more, and lush with thickly covered branches, was festooned with what must have been two hundred sparkling lights, elegantly draped silver and gold garlands, a joyously mixed selection of ornaments, and at the top, not one angel but two - a figurine of a flit-wolf and a flit-tiger, wings unfurled, forepaws clasped together, leaning like flying buttresses in a never-ending dance of love and joy.

"You'd never know it was fake, would you?" Cole grinned. "I prefer that my live trees continue living long and happy lives in the forest, where they belong... and where I can hike a leg on one, should I need to."

Benedict laughed heartily, noticing that Parker wasn't quite sure if he should join in or not. "Good for marking your territory, I suspect."

"Although we flit-wolves often water our trees from above. Discreetly, of course. In some extreme cases, it's rather like dumping ballast."

"I'd almost forgotten the holidays were here," Parker said softly. The dragon saw that the pup was taking in every aspect of the room, his restless eyes finally stopping at the couch, where Jerry stood slowly and regarded the Akita with might be described as uncertain affection.

"Hello, Zachary."

"Jerry." The swallow produced an almost audible click from Parker's throat. After a moment, the young male padded slowly toward the otter, coming to a stop barely an arm's reach away. He extended a forepaw, which Jerry took, gently squeezing, but clearly uncertain if he should go any further.

A soft musical chime sounded from the kitchen. Cole smiled. "Tea's up. I'll be back in just a few minutes."

As the flit-wolf left the room, Benedict cast his keen, benevolent eye upon the two young furs who still held each other's forepaw, gazing at one another, neither sure what to do. Body language could not hide the clues - shifting ears, tail movements, a slight twitching of the fur. Both were nervous, both were needful, neither sure of his ground or perhaps even his motives. In their talks, Parker had told the dragon a great deal about what he wanted to tell Jerry, and it wasn't at all what he'd been expecting. Moving slowly, Benedict approached one of the larger chairs. "Perhaps we should all sit down."

Parker and Jerry broke their mutual grasp with what felt to the dragon like reluctance. They sat on the sofa, a little distance apart, each still looking at the other. From a therapist's viewpoint, the prolonged silence was a double-edged sword. It would be best, Benedict knew, if the two of them were able to guide the conversation themselves. However, guiding would mean beginning, and neither seemed quite ready to take that first step. As the moment stretched, the professor found himself turning his head toward a discreet cough at the archway into the room.

"I hope I'm not intruding. I was looking for Cole."

Benedict rose as the black-furred flit-tiger shimmered toward him, his deep emerald-green stripes and tribal markings blending hypnotically as his muscles moved fluidly underneath the athletic shirt and fleece jogging pants, his bare hindpaws making no sound on either the smooth-polished wood floor or the various plush area rugs placed artfully throughout the room. The great crimson dragon shook the proffered forepaw, then introduced Parker. The Akita also shook the tiger's paw, his face as neutral as possible, an attempt at a smile being made and left behind. The pup was under enough pressure, and whatever his other progress, he still seemed nervous at the idea of two males not merely living together but being married to each other.

"Welcome," Guy said warmly, the smile on his muzzle wide enough to allow a quick glimpse of particularly white teeth and fangs. "We're glad to have you."

"It's good to be had," the drake said, also smiling.

"Cole warned me about you," the flit-tiger chuckled. "I can see your reputation is well deserved."

"It's good to know my efforts haven't been for naught."

"Ingratiating yourself, Benedict?" Cole entered bearing a tray with a tea set and cookies for three and set it on the table before the couch.

"Working my way in, perhaps?" From the corner of his eye, he noted Jerry trying not to laugh and Parker trying not to be uncomfortable. The professor bowed slightly. "I'll dial it back a notch."

The flit-wolf stood up again and turned to place a kiss on his mate's muzzle. "Everything okay, love?"

"The kits want their wuff-papa to sing to them before they'll settle down for a nap."

"Command performance, eh?" Cole chuckled. "Okay. We should probably leave these good furs to their privacy."

"Wait a minute," Parker said, his brows knotted. "Kits?"

The married couple turned toward the young athlete, a slightly amused look in their eyes. It was clear that they'd heard this reaction before. "Yes. Paulo is my son; Annabelle is Guy's daughter." The flit-wolf seemed to take pity on his guest. "A surrogacy program. Neither of us has met either of the females, although I did try to meet the mother of my son."

The young Akita looked down, muttering an apology. "I didn't mean to be rude."

"Not rude," Guy offered. "Inexperienced, perhaps? Not that many gay couples have kits and pups, and usually, it's because one or the other was in a straight relationship first. The number is rising every year, with adoptions and surrogacy as options for everyone."

"Have you always wanted kits?"

"Cole did," said Jerry and Guy, at the same time that Cole said, "I did." They chuckled, and the flit-wolf continued, putting an arm around his husband. "It's been the source of the only serious fights we've ever had. Guy didn't think he'd be a good father."

"I was terrified of the idea," the flit-tiger confessed easily enough, smiling softly. "Not only am I gay, I'm feline... and you know how selfish and vain we cats can get! Also, I was an only kit, so I didn't have much experience with other kits in the household. Being a doctor didn't help, especially because I get so many long shifts; I'm not around enough."

"We're working on that." Cole kissed his husband again, smiling. "And just as I told him he would be, he's the best kitty-papa in the world."

"But I couldn't carry a tune in a washtub, so the kits want their not-tone-deaf papa to sing to them." Squeezing his mate in a side-by-side hug, Guy nodded to his guests. "We'll leave you alone. Just let us know if there's anything you need. I'd suggest that you just come to the head of the stairs and wave, in case we actually do get the yowens to sleep."

"Can I..." Parker stumbled over his words for a moment. "Can I ask you one more inexperienced question?"

"Of course."

The Akita screwed up his features as if trying to find the right phrasing. "Are you guys... do you two worry about... well, everything? I mean, being a couple, being parents... it's not a very nice world out there... bullies and haters and all that..." He looked up at the couple, his eyes telling that he had, for himself at least, come to the end of words.

Guy looked down at his hindpaws for a moment before answering. "Mr. Parker... I was on shift the night of your... encounter on the football field. My only job was to heal the injured, and I hope that I and the staff did a good job of it. I learned long ago not to believe what I hear in rumors or the news - which, in some cases, is the same thing. I didn't judge you then, and I won't now, except to say that I sense you're smarter than you give yourself credit for, and that you're starting to realize that what happened that night wasn't really who you are."

Benedict held his breath as Parker looked up, wide eyed, ears back. "What do you know?"

"I know nothing, Mr. Parker," the flit-tiger said softly. "But the question that you asked shows me that you've thought about this sort of thing. It tells me that the idea concerns you, regardless of whether you're gay, straight, or otherwise. And it tells me that you're not someone to allow whatever experience you may have gone through to rest unexamined. That's courage, pup. And that's an admirable quality."

"Of course we worry," Cole added. "All parents worries about their young, about their futures, about all the unknowns. There will always be haters, nay-sayers, trolls, and furs who just plain aren't nice to be around. The trouble is, you can't live your own life by other people's rules. You have to find a way not to care what other people think. There have been a lot of furs who would try to drag us down, hate us, hurt us."

"How do you handle that?"

"By remembering that the only people who matter are the ones we love. By remembering that we aren't here to measure up to anyone's expectations but our own. By loving each other, and loving our kits. Being there, supporting their hearts. By giving ourselves permission to love who we love, to shine our light in a world trying to cave in to the darkness." The flit-wolf paused, his wings shifting slightly, as if to emphasize the care in choosing his words. "Do I remember reading that you were orphaned, Mr. Parker?"

"Zachary. And yes."

Nodding slowly, Cole said, "Thank you for caring, Zachary." Husband glanced at husband, and both smiled softly. "We can't offer you a family, Zachary, but we welcome new friends. You know Jerry, and as you may have noticed, we think rather highly of him. Perhaps you'd like to visit again soon...?"

Parker swallowed audibly, coughed slightly. "Thank you," he managed to whisper. "I'm... still trying to understand things."

As the Akita lowered his head for a moment, Benedict saw Cole toss a look his way. Nodding his chin a few centimeters, the dragon hoped that he'd be able to convey enough information without giving away too much. Cole and Guy would be valuable allies for Parker, if all went well.

"We'll leave you to your conversation." Guy smiled gently at the trio and, still embracing his husband, he turned and left the room with him.

* * * * * * * * * *

Benedict filled the resulting silence with the pouring of tea, passing a cup to each of his young friends before taking one for himself. The aroma was rich, comforting, and temptation in the form of freshly-made snickerdoodles on the cookie plate was nearly irresistible. Settling back in his chair, the professor decided that he needed to take the bull by the horns (which reminded him, for just a moment, of a particularly thrilling evening in Madrid, before he turned his mind back to the present situation). "I know that the purpose of this visit is to talk to each other, so forgive me if I'm being forward. I have the sense that neither of you knows where to begin...?"

After another moment, Jerry half-turned to Parker and blurted out, "I'm sorry."

The Akita said nothing.

"Sorry about what, Jerry?" Benedict prompted gently.

"Sorry for making you..." The otter looked up at the pup, his small rounded ears splayed. "I feel like I made you... what happened on the field..."

"Let's call it what it was." The footballer spoke without overt anger or accusation. "I damn near killed a guy."

"Zachary..." the dragon intoned softly.

Reluctantly, Parker nodded. "I know. It felt that way, though. And it was a bad beating." He looked at Jerry candidly. "Benedict has been helping me try to understand what happened. He's showing me how to describe it without exaggerating or making myself worse over it. It was bad, and I'm really sorry that it happened, but I'm starting to find out what happened. The best words I can come up with are, I was enraged."

"And I made you do that."

"No, you didn't." The Akita started to reach toward the grad student, thought better of it. "You didn't make me do anything. In a way, I didn't even make me do what I did. It was like something in my head exploded, and all I felt was rage."

Jerry asked softly, "Because of what I did?"

"No." Parker breathed evenly for a few moments. "Jerry, I'm still figuring this out. When I really understand it all, I promise I'll tell you. I just need you to know that you didn't make me do anything. You weren't responsible." He swallowed hard. "But I think I made you--"

"No." The otter was emphatic. "Don't take that on. What I did was be as stupid as I could possibly be, and I used you and the booze as an excuse. You didn't do this to me, and you didn't make me do it to myself. And I'm sorry that I ever said so." He looked at Benedict, his eyes showing the certainty that the dragon had passed along Jerry's pain-filled, drunken accusations at the hospital. "I was hurting and lashing out. I've had time to think now. I'm sorry."

Long moments passed. Finally, the Akita asked, "Are you okay?"

"I will be." Jerry managed a smile. "A lot better than I was a few weeks ago. Pain meds help. Truth is, though, I'm getting better every day. I'm healing. The bones are healing, anyway."

"I've fractured a few ribs, too... and I mean my own." Parker managed a short laugh, and Jerry chittered a bit before wincing a little. "Careful, there... it's usually about six to eight weeks."

"Jerry has some species advantage there, Zachary." Benedict leaned forward. "Otters are amazingly flexible, and their bones tend to heal faster because they're more malleable than most."

"Are you okay? Really?"

The grad student nodded confidently, a shy smile on his lips. "I'm a lot better just for your being here, Zach--" He caught himself.

"Zachary," the Akita smiled back. "And I'm glad, because I... well, I still need to talk with you."

Slowly, Jerry reached out a forepaw and touched Parker's shoulder. "I'm here. Finally."

Benedict was surprised, in a good way, when the footballer didn't reflexively pull back from the touch. Even more surprising was that Parker raised his arm to reach across his chest and cover the otter's forepaw with his own. The pup looked over to Benedict, a fearful question in his eye. The dragon only nodded, and the Akita turned back to look the otter in the eye.

"Jerry... I've talked about you with Benedict, a lot. I have questions, but I also need to tell you something important. What you did in the library basement... what I let you do..." The pup visibly steeled himself, then blurted out, "It felt really good. And that scared me, because it's not supposed to. I know what you said, even Harris told me the same thing, but there's something in me that was terrified that it felt so good. There's something in my head that made me feel scared for my life because of what happened. I know that makes no sense, but it's true, and I really need you to hear me. It felt good, Jerry, and I thought that it wasn't supposed to, and I would have done anything to have blocked out those feelings, anything, and I didn't even know why..."

The dragon leaned forward as he heard the pup begin to sob. "Zachary...?"

The athlete shook his head hard. "No, it's okay, it just really hurts..."

"Why, Zachary?" Jerry put both forepaws onto the pup's shoulders, squeezing gently. "Why does it hurt?"

"I'm... I'm still..." He sniffed loudly. "I'm still trying to find out. But it's not supposed to hurt you too. I never wanted you to be hurt."

"It's okay," the otter whispered. Benedict could see the grad student resisting the urge to pull the Akita close and hold him. "It's okay, Zachary. I know you meant no harm."

Parker's body seemed to freeze. The dragon could almost see every muscle in his body tensing, quivering, plucked strings in a chord that vibrated to the pup's core.

"Harm..." he whispered.

Jerry still held the athlete by the shoulders, but his eyes and ears began to show fear. Benedict reached into his pocket and slipped the ring onto one finger, the trigger phrase ready in his mind.

"Oh, Harm..." The words came from Zachary, but the voice was pitched higher and held some slight accent. "...you're so much smarter than you give yourself credit for."

The otter's brows knit together so hard that it looked painful. The dragon leaned closer, his voice barely a susurration of breath in the quiet room. "Zachary, did you want to ask a question?"

A long silence. Touching a finger to his lips, Benedict gave Jerry a signal to stay quiet. Something was stirring in the Akita's brain, and it was better if they didn't push it any further. To the drake, it sounded very much as if a door were creaking open, or a wall starting to crack, and this was neither the time nor the place for that to happen.

Slowly, the athlete raised his head and looked Jerry directly in the eyes. In something like a whimper, he asked, "Am I gay?"

A pause, two slow breaths. "I don't know, Zachary." The otter kept his voice low and soft. "If it helps at all, I'd like to know you as a friend, whether you're gay or not."

"Why?"

"You're a good furson."

"How do you know that?"

"Because you cared enough to come back and talk to me. Guy is right: That took courage." Jerry's eyes misted. "And because I want you to find your answers."

"What if I..." The Akita paused, unsure, ears splayed, his voice quaking. "What if I wanted you to... do that again? Would you?"

The otter squeezed Parker's shoulders gently. "Only if it wouldn't hurt you."

"Does that mean I'm gay?"

"It means..." Jerry flicked a glance at Benedict; he clearly hoped that he was about to say the right answer. "It means that you trust me. And you can, Zachary. You can trust me. I don't ever want to hurt you again. Believe me."

The crackling of the fire on the hearthstone sounded loud in the silence. No one moved. The drake watched for changes in body language and saw almost none at all; save for breathing, the two on the couch could have been statues. After nearly a full minute, Parker nodded slowly, his eyes still locked on Jerry's. The otter returned the gesture with tender solemnity.

"Zachary... may I hug you?"

Though his eyes appeared watery, the Akita smiled. "Friends hug, too." To the otter's curious expression, the pup said, "Something Eoin taught me." He leaned into Jerry's open arms and pulled him near, providing the sort of close hug that (Benedict realized) was still new for Parker. In a sly little motion, the great crimson drake pocketed the ring once more, then leaned back in his chair. He was loathe to break up such a sweetly affectionate embrace, and for once, time seemed to be on their side. As the two young furs rocked slowly back and forth, oblivious to anything but each other, Benedict relaxed, content to wait.