John The Dunsparce

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Bithday gift, for a friend of mine! Completed 02/04/2012 Edit & full upload 08/17/2015 (on another site) At the time I wrote this I was... 16 and this was the longest story I've written in around 1 week or two, so there was a time crunch and also my skills were pretty bad. He didn't like the gift (for obvious reasons) but it was a fun experience. For name sake things have been edited out but otherwise the story isn't much different from the original (other than serious formatting.)

Classroom Shenanigans

Twas an average day at Bridges, it was first period and as usual the classes were dragging by sluggishly. In rooms 17, 20 & 21 we find our group bored out of their minds and nearly slipping to the verge of sleep. The teachers and students alike were very tired and finding it hard to keep themselves awake. An announcement came over the intercom.

"Good Morning Bridges, I know that we just came back from Daylight savings end and everyone is a bit groggy so, This period everyone has a chance to get that hour of sleep back."

The whole school seemed to fill with an outburst of cheers from all the students, that could be heard from down many blocks. As soon as it had started the loud cheers dropped to dead silence as all but seven students were asleep.

Those seven students were John the Dunsparce, Octus the Raichu, Kazuma the Farfetch'd, Sanders the Porygon, Trevor the Doduo nicknamed "Kiwi", Marcus the Raticate, and Javier "Sketch" the Smeargle.

While everyone else lay their heads down on the tables the seven Poké teens quietly walked out of the classrooms and met downstairs on the play structure out on the yard.

John: "So what do we do now?"

Kazuma: "I dunno, it's kinda weird that everyone fell asleep."

Sketch: "I'm not too surprised, after all, it is Spring forward."

John: "Yeah I guess." The group started talking about other things that have happened recently and then sketch had an interesting idea.

Sketch: "Guys we should see how much shit we could get into."

John: "That sounds like a terrible idea."

Sketch: "Come on John, we should."

John: "I don't know guys..."

Kazuma: "It's settled we're doing it."

Octus, Kazuma, Sanders, Kiwi, Sketch, and Marcus dragged John along in another one of their crazy schemes. Each Poké went up in a separate room ranging from 15-21 and rearranged the classes to their bidding. Sanders was in rm 15, Sketch had 16, Kazuma guarded 17, 18 was John, Octus went to 19, Marcus claimed 20, and Kiwi 21.

Octus dipped everyone's paws in warm water and drew all over their faces all while giving a witty remark after each prank. Sketch copied everyone's handwriting and made love letters to and from different Poké in the classroom. Kiwi laid all the students on their tables making them "plank". He laughed at how stupid they looked. John wasn't sure what to do. He did the first thing that came to mind which was leaving everyone on the ground to put the chairs on top of the tables. Marcus, being reckless as usual opened up all the windows and slung the sleeping Pokémon outside of them. Sanders devised a brilliant plan on how to prank the class. He set up electrical wires throughout the chairs so to leave, the Poké would have to get up in a certain sequence otherwise everyone gets shocked. Kazuma looked at his leek and grinned with excitement. He began cutting up the legs of the chairs and tables. he left the room looking the same although, if someone were to move,the tables and chairs would fall into pieces. The six met up in room 22.

Octus: "Hmm. Second period and no one's awake." They looked over and found Mr. Raptorman asleep. The pranksters circled him.

John: "Come on guys, don't prank Mr. Raptorman, he's my favorite teacher." They looked at the Dunsparce with that look that read "John, Shut up."

Kazuma: "Fine, we won't prank him."

John: "Thanks guys, that means a lot to me-"

Kazuma: "Sketch. grab his keys."

John: "What?! I thought you said you weren't going to prank him?!"

Sanders: "Shh, are you trying to wake up the whole school John?" Kiwi Lol'd himself.

Kiwi: "Yeah John, don't wake up the school!"

"KIWI SHUT UP!" all of them whisper screamed. They headed downstairs and stopped at Mr. Raptorman's truck.

Marcus: "How much time do we have?"

Sanders: "Forty five minutes before third period."

Octus: "Great!"

Kazuma: "Alright who's driving?"

"Let me drive." The others looked at the Raticate like he was cray.

"No." they all replied.

"I could drive." Sanders happily volunteered.

Octus: "Hmm, maybe."

Sketch: "Ooh, Ooh John should drive!"

John: "What? Me?"

Octus: "I second that notion."


Kiwi: "Aye"

Kazuma: "Notion carried." Kazuma tossed the keys to the out of luck Dunsparce.

Sanders: "You'll do fine John." Octus Called Shotgun and sat in the passenger seat, Marcus, Sanders, and Kiwi sat behind them. Sketch called pistol.

John: "Get in the trunk Sketch."

"Gladly." And with that Sketch hopped into the trunk.

John: "What about you Kazuma?"

Kazuma: "I got roof of course."

John: "Are you sure?" The Farfetch'd flew up to the rooftop.

Kazuma: "I'm a flying type remember?"

John: "Right.."

Marcus: "Let's Go!" Second period started. The Pokémon at the school were still in deep sleep. "I could go for some sushi." John drove to a sushi house and Kazuma had gotten a dozen salmon rolls.

John: "Okay it's half way into second period, what next?"

Octus & Sketch: "I could go for some In-N-Out."

"Sure." John drove the large truck to In-N-Out. They pulled up to the microphone. "We'll have 2 double-doubles, 2 vanilla milkshakes, and 2 orders of fries." A feminine voice replied.

"That'll be $6.74 please pull up to the first window." Just as soon as John was about to pull 'round the corner, Kiwi decided to make a later order.

Kiwi: "Wait I want to order too." Octus glared back at him.

Octus: "You... Dense... Mother fucker. Why didn't you order with us?"

Kiwi: "I wasn't hungry then."

Octus: "Well too bad you're gonna have to wait."

John: "No, let him order."

Kiwi: "I'll take a single, with fries and a coke." The female came back over the microphone.

"Okay... That brings your total up to $8.47"

John: "Okay. Sketch can you spot a $10?"

"Sure" The smeargle took out a thin fabric and perfectly counterfeited a $10 bill. "Pass that up to John." They Pulled up to the first window and paid the lovely Typhlosion working the cash register.

"Here's your change." She put the money on the trucks dashboard. They got their food and headed back to Alameda.

John: "Time Check."

Sketch: "15 minutes in Third."

John: "Kay. Anywhere else?"

Marcus & Sanders: "Subways." John drove to Subways and picked up Sanders and Marcus' Subs.

John: "Let's chill at my house for a while."

"Sweet." John pulled the truck in front of his house. They played Magic: the gathering, ate their food, and goofed around.

Sanders: "This is fun."

John: "Yeah, I know."

Sketch: "And to think that we could do all this during school." They all had blank stares.

All: "What... Time... Is... It?"

Sketch: "20 minutes before fourth ends."

John: "We have to get back to school!" They all quickly finished up and hopped into the truck.

All: "DRIVE JOHN DRIVE!" The 7 sped down the streets of Alameda and pulled up in the school parking lot.

John: "Get out, get out. Where to?"

"Back to Raptorman." The Pokémon went upstairs and waited in room 22 with their heads down feigning sleep and waiting for everyone's huge reaction. 5 minutes. They closed their eyes and braced themselves. 3... 2... 1... The whole school was filled with screams of embarrassment and confusion. Raptorman and the seven "woke up" wondering what could have happened. The seven miscreants chuckled to themselves as their master plan went by without any complications.

Ski Trip

The Whole Junior and Senior class is traveling by bus to Tahoe. Their favorite Bio teacher, the Cubchoo named Snow was Chaperoning them, sitting at the front of the bus conversing with the driver.

Hours had already passed and most of the Pokémon had fallen asleep. Towards the middle of the bus was John everyone's favorite Dunsparce. Sleeping next to John was Rena the Sandshrew and Neko the Clefable. Across from them was Octus, Sketch, and Kazuma. Sitting in front of John was Marcus, Sanders and Kiwi. After a total of 8 hours the bus came to a halt. The bus driver deliberately came to a harsh stop, to wake up all the unsuspecting sleeping students. All of the teens hit their heads on the back of the seats in front of them. Slowly the students trickled out the bus at the pace of Molasses. They found themselves in front of a Ski Lodge and hotel. The now shivering large group walked into the lobby of the Lodge. A Lunatone greeted them at the door.

"Hello everyone and welcome to the Northstar Lodge, who is the adult accompanying you?" Snow got the Lunatone's attention. The Lunatone looked down at him.

"Yes, I'm their teacher, so their my responsibility."

"Excellent sir, how many cabins will everyone be staying in?" Snow turned around and found the Pokémon divided into six groups.

"Six Cabins please."

"Alright, and I'll take it as, you will be staying here at the hotel?"


"And may I have your name sir?" Snow hesitated and choked. "Excuse me?"



"Finn... Snow." The Lunatone snickered.

"Please enjoy your stay here and, (snicker) please try not to get lost in the snow, Snow."

"I'll try not to." Snow said through gritted teeth.

"Here's your key sir, room 307."

"Thank you." Snow lead the six groups to the large cabins.

"Here's the cabins you guys, there's six here so I'll let you guys divide them amongst y'all."

The six groups dispersed into the cabins. Inside the group of most importance to this story, John & Co. there were 3 double bunk beds.

"Hmm, So how are we going about this guys?"

"There's only six, we can't divvy up the room right."

"I know a way we can divvy up the room."

"What is it Sketch?"

"John", Sketch called his name deliciously.


"Why not?"

"Sketch, I already told you, I'm not gay."

"I won't try anything." Sketch smirked.


"Don't worry guys, I'll sleep on the floor." The Raticate went into a closet and pulled out an extra bed spread and rolled it out on the middle of the floor.

"Damn, so close." The Dunsparce started panicking.

"So you were going to try me?"

"Nooo..." They all gave the Smeargle awkward stares.

"How about we go to the Ski lift? It's getting hot in here."

"Sure..." The seven left to the ski lifts.

"You think Snow is having fun in the (snerk) snow?"


"I hope he doesn't get mad, otherwise we're sure in for a, snowstorm."

"HAHAHAHA We sure are." They all Ski'id for hours on end. Joking around and losing track of time.

"Time to head back guys."

"Yeah I guess it is." They head counted.

"John, Sketch, Sanders, Octus, Kiwi, Kazuma..."

"Has anyone seen Marcus?"

"Yeah..." He trailed off.

"Why'd you say it like that?"

"Well, he kinda started getting annoying so while we were on the Ski lift I 'accidently' pushed him off." They stared at him with a loss of words.

"We'll find him tomorrow, it's late."

"Good point." They went back to their cabin and slept. The next morning all the students were called into the Northstar Lobby.

"It's 5 in the morning, what's so important?" The Lunatone was pacing.

"This is terrible, My sweet little Cubchoo is missing." The Pokémonwere taken aback by his remark and took a step back from the distressed Lunatone.

"We'll go looking for him." The six groups became temporary rescue teams and went out looking for Snow.

"It looks like Snow really did get lost in the Snow..." The six traveled across the Snowy terrain looking for any signs of Snow.

"Look, tracks!"

"But whose tracks are they?"

"Judging by the look and depth. I'd say... An Abomasnow." They all had a look of disbelief on their faces.


"Sketch, how did You?"

"I just know these things." They followed tracks until they came to a high cliff.

"Look up there!" High up near the cliff's summit was a cave.

"We'd better hurry."

Kazuma flew up to the top while the other's took half an hour scaling the cliff's side. Once they got to the top they took some time to catch their breaths.

"Okay, we're here."

"There's a boulder?!"

"Don't worry guys, I got this." Kazuma sliced the boulder into pieces.

"Was that really necessary?"

"Yes. Yes it was" They entered the cave and saw Abomasnow cuddling the poor little Cubchoo.

"John what do we do?"

"Why do I have to figure this out?"

"Cuz you're the smart Juan."

"Help... Me..."

"We're coming Snow."

"You can't take my snuggle bear away, He's mine!"

"John, convince her that we need him back."

"Uhhh..." Kazuma pushed him towards her.

"Umm, excuse me ma'am?"

"What do you want?"

"Well we need our teacher back."

"And... Why should I give him back?"

"Well, without him, we wouldn't have a teacher."


"We wouldn't have that great of an education, which would mean that future generations would not be educated and not have enough knowledge and common sense to keep them out of trouble which would eventually lead to a world full of ignorant Pokémon. And then you would have to deal with the fact that you were the cause of that."

The Abomasnow had tears in her eyes. She let Snow go and started crying.

"Umm guys, we should really go now."

The seven Pokémon ran out of the cave and headed back to the Lodge. Two hours later. Everyone met up at the lodge.

"Snow, We're so glad that you're back!"

"Glad to be back, We should head back soon."

"How bout noon tomorrow?"

"Deal." They slept in for the night and by noon the next day, everyone was on the bus, and heading back.

"You know, I can't help feeling that we forgot something." They all thought about it.

"Meh, it'll come back to us."

Over back in the cave. The Abomasnow had Marcus in her clutches.

"I swear, I will kill them all!"

Adventures in Switzerland

It's summer and what better way to enjoy it than with road trip and a group of friends.

"Guys, I'm so Juiced for this road trip."

"I know, Where are we going again?"



"How about somewhere in Africa?"

"Sounds nice but how about somewhere not as ... Impoverished..."


"How about Switzerland."

"That, actually doesn't sound like a bad idea."

"Great, when will we be able to go?"

"Let's pack up and head out in two days."

"Two days gotcha."

Two days later.

"Okay guys, we all prepared?"





"Let's get this over with."

"Let's go!"

"Fine fine. Geez no need to shout. Meet me at the Airport."


An hour later.

"Okay everyone's here. We're on flight 621 gate E."


"What's so funny?"

"Nothing nothing."

"Okay then."

The seven poke went through the large metal detectors. *zzz* Kiwi walked by. *zzz* Sanders made it through. *beeep* Octus was pulled to the side.

"What? I have earrings."

"Sorry sir, you could go."

*zzz* Marcus made it through. *buzz* Sketch was pulled to the side.

"Sir you've been selected for a random pat down."

"Sure, just be gentle with me."

"Sketch stop flirting with security!"

"Can't help it."

"Step to the side sir."

"How old are you."

"17, and I needed an internship."

"Mmm. You're just my age, and just my type. Mind if I, pat You down?"

The Dewott flinched. "Umm." He blushed.

Sketch quit messing with him.

"Fine. Go ahead cutie, pat me down."

The otter patted Sketch down gently. "You're clean."

"I'd say I'm pretty dirty." Sketch started walking back.



"Take this." He handed him a small slip of paper with a number and a name.

"Sergio huh?" Sketch smiled and shot Sergio a wink before going back to his friends.

"Did you really just do that?"


"You got his number. Sketch, just admit you're gay."

"Nope! I could if I wanted to, but I'm not gonna."

*Beep* Kazuma stepped to the side.

"Sir, is that a sword?"

"No this is a leek."

"Is that a weapon?"

"No. Although it can cut through steel."

"Sir I'm going to have to ask you to put the leek down."

"Aww. Fine."

The security guard put the leek with their luggage.

Bzz. John passed by. "Alright everyone. Lets board the plane."

The seven boarded and took their seats.

"This is my first time on a plane. I'm a bit scared."

"I feel ya. What about you john?"


The pilot and co pilot came over the intercom. "Alright everyone, this flight is headed to switzerland. Rumor has it that the swiss have some of the world's best chocolates, watches, and bankers. Enjoy flight e621."

The plane took off. Reaching higher altitude. Sketch and Sander's ears popped.

"Man, I've never been this high befor- ooo look at the view." Sketch seemed pretty excited about the trip more than the others.

A day and a half passed.

"Okay passengers. We are entering the Swiss territory."

Two hours passed before they landed.

At the Swiss airport.

"We're actually here! This is amazing."

"Where to first?"

"They were in Bern."

Sketch pulled out a travel guide.

"It says here that there are plenty of attractions to see. The Swiss Alpine, Bern History and Parl Klee museums. Clock Tower. Fountain Zahringen. Bern Rose Garden. Bears Pit. Einstein's house. And Franklin College! Eeee!"

"An Excadrill Taxi driver greeted them. You need a Taxi?"

"Uhh. Sure, but will all seven of us fit?"

"Not a problem. I have a van. He presented the long van. 10 seater."


They all got into the van and traveled.

"So where you guys headed?"

"To the Swiss Alpine Museum please."

"Sure thing."

Along the way the Excadrill introduced himself as Jerry.

At the Museum, they saw many different arts, modern tales and also food tables.

"Gasp! Swiss Chocolate!" Sketch was the first one to jump at it. They all took one piece of the decadent rich sweet little block.

Next they traveled not too far from that Museum to the Bern History Museum. They learned about Switzerland's great economy and a lot about why Swiss watches are so high quality and even about Einstein's time spent in the Swiss regions. Jerry picked them up again and drove them over to the Clock Tower and Einstein's house.

"That Cranidos was really something else. Smart and always investing his time in Science and Math."

"Wow! This is super amazing."

It was getting really late so next they traveled to a hotel.

"We'll stay here for the night."

They were checked in and all had rooms on the same floor.

"Ah. These rooms are great. And they have chocolates for us! Squee!"

The night was peaceful and calm. The next morning they left the hotel and decided to visit the Bear pit. The Bear pit was filled with Cubchoos, Teddiursas, Beartics and Ursarings.

"There aren't a lot of bear poke but look at how happy they are."

"The bears were playfully sprawling about."


They went around different restaurants, cafes, and street vendors. Tasting the flavors of Switzerland.

"These Swiss pastries are divine. Mmm. The different foods are also delectable. Ahh."

"Where to next."

"Let's just venture around."


The seven split up and met Poke, making new friends and learning more and more about the European country. As the day started fading to night they all met back up at the Hotel and decided to sleep in past the next day. The day after next they decided to continue hanging out with their new friends.

Sketch had picked up some Swiss customs and a few naughty phrases. Octus learned some Swiss puns, how to cook and a few other secrets on how to deal with poke who are nuisances. Sanders was taught some was to think even more ingenuitively. Marcus was having troubles as all he could find to do with his time was hitting on female Swiss poke. Kazuma had interesting conversations with the Swiss poke comparing his Japanese culture, to the Swiss culture that he would be assimilated to if he stayed for the rest of his life. Kiwi spent a lot of time trying to learn how to be quiet but that wasn't working that well, and John made the most of his time just making friends and learning as much as possible. After hours of getting to know how the Swiss really were, Jerry met them at a park.

"You guys need to go somewhere else?"

"You think you can take us to the Flower garden?"

"Sure thing."

He drove them over to the flower garden. The seven walked through the large flowers which seemed to grow taller the further they went in.

"They should've called this the flower forest."

"Really though."

As they went further and further in, they ended up separating.

John was getting worried. But getting lost was the least of his troubles. An Ariados was in the area.

"Hmmm. I wonder if I'll meet anyone nice today. Hm? Ah!" He grinned. The Ariados spotted John. "A Dunsparce, how rare."

John came to a dead end wall. "Why would there be a wall here? Ugh. Time to turn back. Huh?"

The Ariados blocked his path. "Tell me something little Dunsparce, what's your name."

"Why do you want to know?"

"I'll help you out of this here maze."

"Hmm. John."

"Oh. What a lovely name. Climb on my back."

"I'm not sure about that."

"Fine, looks like we have to do this the hard way."


The Ariados used sleep powder on John. The drowsy Dunsparce fought his tiredness back.

"No, I won't... Succumb... To... To... Slee..." John slipped out of consciousness.

"Hehehe, you're coming with me John. Or better yet, I'll be coming in you. Hehe. I'll still hold my promise though. I will get you out of here." The Ariados climbed up a tree with John wrapped up in a web.

The others were able to make it out after about 30 minutes of testing pathways. In that time the Ariados was able to relocate to a discreet area. At the same time Octus, Kiwi, Kazuma, Sanders, and Marcus got out of the maze, John woke up underneath the Ariados.

"What are you doing?"

"If you don't know then you must not be very smart, I'm about to eat you of course."

John pleaded for his life. "Please don't eat me, I'm not even that good."

The Ariados licked John. "Mmm, I'd say you're delicious." Ariados used Charm.

John felt strange.

"Hmm. It seems that you're resisting my Charm. How about my Attract?"

John fought back the temptations.

"Hmm. Looks like I'll have to use more drastic measures." He used Charm and Attract at the same time.

John still didn't succumb to the Ariados' power.

"Looks like you just won't budge. Oh well... I can still have my fun." Ariados used Sweet kiss on John.

John squirmed under him. "I'm not gay!"

"And I don't care."

Ariados used Harden. "I want you to beg for it."

John's eyes widened. "B-b-beg?"

"You know what I want to hear, and I like it when my victims beg."

"No. I won't do it. Because I don't want it or you."

"That's it John, just keep talking. You're only making this all the hotter. Ready my dear little Dunsparce?"

"What?! I will take no part in such Faggotry!"

"Too late." Ariados used Pound. Ariados used Pound. Ariados used Pound. Ariados used pound. Ariados used pound.

John screamed in agony. For ten consecutive minutes Ariados used Pound on John.

"Mmm. John you're so tight."

"Shut up!"

Ariados used string shot!

"Ahh! It hurts even more!"

The Ariados finished having his way with John. "That was amazing John. We're going to have to do that more often."

"Fuck you!"

"It'll be awhile before you get to my sweet John."

"That's not what I mean and you fucking know it."

"It's getting late John and I bet your friends are looking for you. You'd better get going."

As John got up after Ariados moved off of him, warm liquid pooled underneath him. "Ehhh." He glared at the Ariados in anger. I hate you!

"I know you do, and I love you John.. Lance."


"My name is Lance."

John crawled away from the Ariados as fast as he could. John found himself in an old shack. He rushed to the hotel that his friends and he were staying at. He didn't talk to anyone, jumped in the shower and just went straight to bed.

The next day.

John walked out of his room still shaken.

Sketch met him at a hug. "John, we were worried. Where were you?"

The others were gathered around him.

"I umm." He looked around and noticed people were staring. "I'll tell you when we get back to the airport."

They met up with Jerry. "So how did you guys enjoy your time in Switzerland?"

"It was..."

"Fun! The food here is amazing! I think I'll come back for another trip."

At the airport.

John explained to them about Lance the Ariados. They looked at him with remorse, except for Sketch.

"So John, how come you can have sex with a Gay-riados. And not be gay yet if I get a cute guy's number I'm automatically considered gay?"

"It wasn't sex Sketch I was raped! And i'm not gay!"

"Suuuure John."

They boarded flight e621.

"I still love the name of this flight."

"Why? What's to love about it?"

"You're gonna have to explain that to us."

"Well at least I wont have to deal with Lance anymore."

The plane took off.

"Show's what you know John." Lance was in the back of the plane with luggage and other crates.

Octus in a Mob

School. An education center for some, A prison for others. And to the very few, school was just social grounds to where a poke could hang out. For John and His group it was a mixture of all of them.

An average day at school can turn into anything. This particular day. Everyone was sitting in Tree. The Seven Pokemon sat around a large table playing Magic: The Gathering.

A brick crashed through the window with a note attached.

"No, Emrakul! At least it didn't hit Skithiryx."

"Uhh Sketch?"

He looked and noticed the brick was laying on the corner of the card.

"This is horrible!"

"Calm down. What does the note say?"

Kazuma read the note. "Meet us at Dog Bone Alley tonight at 7. If you don't there will be consequences. -Annihilation Factor of 1"

"Who's this for anyways?"

Octus slammed his paw on the table and Sparks flew from his cheeks in anger.

"Octus what is it?"

"There's something that I haven't told you guys..."


"I used to be in a mob."

Kiwi, John, Kazuma, sanders and Marcus were all shocked.

"Why didn't you tell us?"

"You never asked."

"I'm not surprised."

"How can you not be surprised by this Sketch?"

"I kinda expected it."

"How can you expect that."

The Smeargle shrugged. "I guess i'm just used to surprising information to not have a huge reaction to things."

"Anyways... What will you be doing Octus?"

"I'll have to go of course."

"Then we'll go with you."

"Are you retartared Kiwi? You can't mess around with the mob. They aren't your average gangs. These guys won't hesitate to kill you."


"We hope you'll be fine Octus."

"I just hope that nothing bad will happen.'

"Later that day.

"Okay guys, lets head over towards dog bone alley."

"And why are we doing this? Octus said don't come."

"On contraire he never did say don't come."

"Yeah he did about ten times."

"Did he?"


"Guys whatever you do, don't try to save me, don't follow me, do not show up at dog bone alley, cuz if the mob doesn't kill you, I will. So don't show up, I don't want to see your guys' faces, I don't want to hear a word about you guys and if I do... You won't like the results. Got it?"

"Yeah yeah yeah whatever."

"I'm serious Sketch."

End Flashback.

"Oh yeah I guess he did. But we're still going through with this."

"Something just occured to me."

"And what's that John?"

"Why am I always getting dragged into your guys' crazy ass shit?"

"Because John. We're your friends. We will always do crazy shit and you're always willing to do it with us."

"Wow. I really need to think about my life."

"Yeah yeah John think about your life later, let's go!"

The six left out towards Dog bone alley. Octus was there at Seven on the dot.

An Arcanine, Golduck, and Trapinch met him.

"Long time no see Eightsie."

"Cut the crap Fire fang. What do you need me for?"

"Theres an assignment for you, and only you have stuff to do this here task."

"And my assignment?"

A Crobat walked out of from behind them.

"Your assignment Eightsie."

The six were on a low rooftop listening in on the conversation.

"I wonder what it is?"

"I hope he doesn't have to do anything really bad."

"They're mobsters Kiwi of course it's something bad."

"They leaned in closer and fell down in front of them."

Octus couldn't contain his anger.

"What the hell you guys?! I told you specifically NOT to come!"

"These friends of yours Eightsie?"


"Hmm, maybe they could be of use."


"Take em away boys."

They lead all seven of them to the mob's house of operations.

"Okay youse guys. You Smeargle."

"Yes sir!"

"You begin makin' money?"

"You mean like counterfeiting?"

"Duh, nimrod."

"Oh, okay then." Sketch immediately began making hundreds.

Fire fang, Crazy Eddie, and Wallaby you gets these guys to handle the 'packages'.

"Gotcha boss."

"What packages?"

"Don't worry about it."

They lead, Kiwi, Sanders, Marcus and Kazuma to the back of a large delivery truck.

"Take a box then come back."

They gave each of them a box. "Uf! What's in these boxes anyway?"

"Coke. Now get moving."

"Hey guys do you think that maybe we can get a few after we're done taking these boxes? I'm getting thirsty."

"Kiwi. You must be retartared."

"They brought the boxes to a table where John and Octus were."

"Okay, good. Now Dunsparce, you're going to cut this here 'merchandise' hehehe."

"Octus what does he mean by that?"

Octus cut open the box and pulled out 10 large blocks of pure Cocaine.

"John, this is cocaine, and you need to cut it into individual kilos."

"This here block is ten, so... Watch carefully."

Octus pulled out a switchblade from out of nowhere.

"Octus! Where'd you-"

"Shh. Pay attention."

Octus poured out the coke on the table and divided the mound into ten equally distributed piles.

"Think you can handle that?"

"Uhh. Doesn't look too hard, can I borrow your switchblade?"

"Hell no! This is my baby, you can use my butterfly knife though."

Octus pulled out another knife and handed it to the Dunsparce.

"Here let me start for you."

Octus poured out the contents of the foil wrapping onto the table.

"Uhh... John made his first cut and then after a few minutes made ten uneven piles."

"Come on John. Those are horrible."

The Crobat came back.

"How's it coming along boys?"

John made the piles near perfect after another five minutes of tweaking.

"I think I'm starting to get the hang of this."

"Good to here, and you'll have this done in no time."

After hours later they were on the last box and the packages had gotten much larger.

"Okay John, this is the last box but it has the most in it."

"How much?"

"500 kilos."


Octus emptied the box onto the table.


John cut away at the huge pile for an hour and half.

"2 more piles left before we box everyth aaa aaaa aaachoooooo!" The powder flew up in a large cloud.

"Kid, you literally blew through 500 kilos of pure uncut cocaine."

"I didn't mean to do it."

"Doesn't matter. Goons!" They surrounded him and pulled out guns and knives.

"Big wing, we could settle this like boys or settle this like men."

"What is youse gettin' at?"

"You know what I mean."

"We'll go get all 500 back for you."


"Yep. Marcus would you care to explain?"


"Tell them what we're gonna do. He angrily spoke through gritted teeth."

"Gentlemen... Good day."

Marcus grabbed Kiwi while Sketch, Kazuma, John, Sanders and Octus made their escape.

Later the next day.

"Hm. How do you think Kiwi and Marcus are?"

Back at the Mob's headquarters.

"Damn You Octus!"

Back to them.

"I'm sure they're fine."

Octus in a Mall

After an epic party, Octus finds he's in a mall after hours.

"What the? How in the hell did I get here? Mommy?" The Raichu walked around in the darkness. "I don't even remember going to a mall. And now I'm stuck here until morning. Fucking great. Oh well, at least I'll be able to see what all is in this mall." Octus walked passed many different food courts, clothing departments, shoe stores, and all other types of department stores. "This sucks. Thousands of stores here and nothing is open!" Octus sent a discharge of electricity. Some appliances in the surrounding area turned on. "Oh yeah. I'm an electric type. I should call up everyone." Octus called John, Kazuma, Sketch, Kiwi, and Sanders in a group call. "Yo guys, i'm in a mall."

"How the hell are you in a mall?"

"I have no idea... But guys I can power up this mall!"


"Let's head on over there."

In thirty minutes they all came over to the mall.

"What is Marcus doing here?!" He kinda followed us. "Great now we have to deal with him."

"Or maybe we can lose him."

"Hey Marcus..."


"I think there a few adult movie stores somewhere down there."

"What really?"

"Yeah, but I forget where it is."

"I'll find it." Marcus ran off in search of porn.

"Okay Octus, he's gone."

"Time to jumpstart this mall!" Octus used Thunderwave. The whole mall lit up and doors opened.

"Time for all the fun we could possibly imagine."

"Aww, we need a key to lift these gates."

"Not exactly."

"What do you mean?"

"Ahem." Kazuma sliced down the gates with his Leek. "Like butter."

They all went through different shops as much as possible. In many of the food courts they, cooked up a shit-ton of food and spanned across the virtual northern hemisphere of flavors around the world.

In the clothing departments the six tried on many different fashions. Some of the most memorable outfits that they found and wore around the mall were, Sanders in a retro 80's look, with a white shirt and a red tie. Kazuma wore a traditional black and grey kimono with a kendo mask. Octus sported a Sombrero, red bandana he wore over his mouth and a mariachi suit. Kiwi left one monocle on his two heads, and outfitted them both with a top hat and a neck bow tie.

"Classy Kiwi."

"Why thank you."

"How bout this guys?" Sketch came out in a "leather daddy suit" complete with a spiked collar, spiked cuffs and tail charm.

"That makes you look hella gay Sketch."

"Whatever. It's not as gay as John is."

"For the last time I'm not gay!"

"Yeah yeah tell it to your boyfriend."

"I don't have a boyfriend. I have a stalker."

"Sure, that's what you say now."

The game departments were where they spent the most time. Racing each other, fighting in hand to hand close combat, building empires waging total war, and becoming a Champion to face the many others out in the world in a fight to declare you is the best team.

"We really need to be in more malls after hours."

"Yeah. Wait, guys..."


"Remember when Octus restored the power?"


"Doesn't that mean that everything we've been doing has been caught on film."

"Don't worry about that I can handle it. When we're done I'll just overload the circuits."

After many extended hours on end the six grew weary.

"Guys wanna call it a day?"

"Yeah it's getting late. Power down Octus."

"Sure thing."

Octus used another Thunderwave. The whole mall grew brighter and then dimmer all of a sudden. Kiwi, John, Sanders, Kazuma, Sketch and Octus left.

Marcus had found the adult film store that Octus was talking about earlier and was in there the whole time. "What the?" The lights went out. He walked out of the unit. "They did not just leave me again." Marcus walked around the mall in search of the six but could not find them. "Not Cool."

Attraction Factor

Chemistry, Biology, Physics, all science classes that go hand in hand learning. For John by Junior year he had already completed many of his classes for college credit.

Today he was a T.A. for Chemistry. The teacher for Chemistry was no other than Ms. Psy the Psyduck. "Okay now class, today we will be testing the effects of pheromones."

"Ooooh," the class egged her on.

"Yes very interesting indeed. Now John."

"Yes Ms. Psy?"

"Hold this."

"What is this?"

"This here, is a dangerous chemical C6H4I1P2F3."

"What does it do?"

"It is the chemical structure of a pheromone. One drop of this stuff on you and it will be mating season for everyone of the opposite sex."


"We will be testing using this worksheet for calculations."

Another ten minutes of class went by and John for whatever reason still was guarding the Pheromone chemical. John puffed air as he started to become very bored out of his mind. "Hmm. I wonder what would happen if someone got this all over themselves."

It was almost the end of the period.

"John could you put the pheromones above the closet?"

"Sure Ms. Psy." John grabbed a stool and carefully reached up to gentle place the chemical. A reckless student, a Koffing named Egypt bumped into him harshly causing the glass beaker to break over his head. "Egypt what the hell?!"

"John... You smell really good..."

"Shit. Shit. Shit."

Everyone began smelling the air and was enticed by the pheromones.

"Oh John!"

He ran outside the classroom. "Great! Now I'm doused in pheromones and have the entire 10th grade after me." John quickly made his way upstairs and into Room 21. Along the way he passed up rooms 18 and 22. Everyone from those two classrooms started following his intoxicating smell.

"I need John." "Mmmm." "Pick me John pick me!" Everyone in room 21 was cool with him being there but the smell began to get to everyone. "John, you smell.. Delicious."

"No not you guys too!" He ran out of there and downs stairs now passing all classrooms.

Both students and teachers, male or female were after John.

John hid himself on the play structure outside.

"This is my safest bet."

Octus, Kiwi, Sanders, Marcus, Sketch, and Kazuma went outside to find him through the crowd of frenzying Pokemon. They went to the play structure.

"John! There you are!"

"Are you guys all love drunk too?"

"What? No! We can control ourselves unlike those heathens out there."

Marcus found it difficult to contain himself. "John you just smell so good."

"Nope!" They pushed the Raticate off the play structure.

"Come on John!" They entered portable F, which no one was in for the time being. Quickly, John's five friends barricaded to doors and windows with the heavy tables and chairs.

"Thanks guys." Sketch hugged the ground snake and began fondling him.

"Oh John!"

"Not you too Sketch. Guys help!"

"Oh I'm not like the others John, the pheromones have no effect on me, I've just always wanted to hug you."

"You could've asked."

"But where's the fun in that?"

"Okay that's enough Sketch."

"Fine." The Smeargle released the confused Dunsparce.

"Kazuma do you think you could fly John out that vent?"

"Uhh sure." He took John through the vent and onto the roof.

"Sanders can you change into a Large Flying type?"

"Yeah." The Porygon shape shifted into a fearow. "You coming Octus."

"I'll get myself outta here."

"Suits yourself." The two came through the large vent.

"Let me see." The Raichu jumped up and down a few times before he latched on to the edge of the vent. He pulled himself up and the six kept low so no one would really notice him.

"What the hell happened to you anyways John?"

"Well I was TA'ing Chem, and Ms. Psy had brought out this pheromone chemical. Then Egypt rammed into me and spilled the whole fuckin beaker on me."

"That bitch!"


"Why the hell would you do that?"

"I don't know but she is so getting expelled."

A lot of pokemon rambled around aimlessly looking for John. "Where could've john went?" "I dunno." "I miss him already!" "John we need you!" "Where are you John?"

Marcus had gotten up. "I know where John is!"

"Someone remind me to kill him."

Octus sent a thunder directly at him. "Bam!" Double damage. Marcus fainted.

"Well that wasn't helpful."

"Okay John we need to get you to a safe distance away." Kazuma flew John to the roof unnoticed. Kiwi flew to the rooftop using his two heads as rudders. Sketch, Octus, and Sanders hopped over and climbed up using a ladder.

"Thank you guys so much for this."

"No problem John."

"We know you'd do the same for us."

John slowly crawled down a platform. Lance was waiting for him there.


"John what is it?"

"That goddamn Ariados is back!"

"I have a name you know.."

"Sorry... Lance is back." Lance pinned John down.

"John control yo man!"

"He's not my man. And I'm not gay!" Lance used Sweet kiss.

"I'd say that's pretty gay John."

"You guys are so nice! Lance I don't have time for this."

"That's why I make time."

"No, that's not what I mean. I'm having a bit of a crisis."

"Which would be?"

"Take a look." He looked over the edge.

"John, I just want to smell you!" "And maybe cuddle you." "And hold you tight." "And make you mine!"

"Hmm. Okay, I'll help."



"But now next time I find you, I'll make sure it's twice as long." John blushed.

"Oooh! John you didn't tell me that you were going on dates with him."

"We're not dating!"

"Denial John."

Lance went down to the blacktop and immediately wrapped people up with stringshot. About half an hours work later everyone was wrapped up.

"See ya later John." He sent him a wink and Sweet kissed him before taking his leave.

"Damn him."

"What should we do now?"

"I dunno."

"What do you think we should do now?"

"That's why I asked you guys!"

"How about we get off this roof?"


They got off the roof and down on the blacktop.


End of the day.

"Wanna hang at my house?"

"Sure." They went to John's house and went upstairs to the attic.

"Okay now what?" Sketch tackled John to the floor. "Sketch what are you doing?"

"Hey John, I just wanted to get you alone.."


"I'm kidding. Let's play some magic." They spent the night away having a huge multi decked game of magic.

The next day.

They traveled back to school and to their surprise everyone was still wrapped up by webbing.

"Okay this is starting to freak me out."

A huge noise emitted from the yard and Pokemon started emerging from to web.

"What happened?"

"Egypt's fault!" Everyone looked at her.

"What? Me?"

"Yeah. I had to put up the pheromones but then you so rudely bumped into me and broke the whole thing over me. Sending everyone into a state where all they could think about was me!"

"Egypt how could you?!"

"I... Uh..." She was speechless.

"Egypt to my office." She went up into Mafia's office. "First you're gonna clean up this mess that you caused and then you're expelled." She went outside and angrily cleaned up the web.

"Looks like it worked out for the better John."

"I guess it sure did, and I didn't get raped today!"

"As much as usual you mean."

"That was a fierce lip rape."

"Shut up!"

Prom Night

Prom night. The time of the school year where people actually do want to come to school to dance.

"So do you guys have dates for the prom."

"Hell yeah. I'm bringing Alison."

"What is she again?"

"A... Pachirisu..."

Everyone chuckled. "Does she shock you a lot Kazuma?"

"Only when she's mad."

"What about you Kiwi?"

"Yeah, you guy's get to meet my fondest Igglybuff."

"Your girlfriend's an igglybuff."

"Yes and I love her."

"I think I'll invite Sergio."

"You mean that Dewott you met at the airport?"



"We've gotten to know eachother a lot and I feel that we've really bonded."

"What about you Octus?"

"Well I would invite Sarrah but I highly doubt she'd make it all the way down here."

"Oh. I'm sorry."

"It's fine."

"Who're you taking Sanders?"

"I dunno."

"Well I'm going to find someone today that I could go to prom with."

"Have fun with that."

"John, you?"

He blushed. "Well uhh, there's this Muk that I'm kinda interested in."

They stared at him in shock.

"What?" "A Muk?" "Are you serious?"

"I find Muks attractive."

"Well we can't exactly complain."

"You should ask her out."

"I'll try but I'm not sure what she'll say."

"Ask her John."

Over the next few days everyone spent time preparing for the prom.

Octus was online in a chat with Sarrah.

Hey Sarrah. Hey Octus. Umm I was just wondering... Uh huh. We have a prom coming up soon. Yes!

But how would you make it. Love can find a way for things my silly Raichu.

Octus blushed hard.

Hope to see you then. Okay. Bye!

They both disconnected.

On skype Adam and Alison were in a voice call.

"Alison, Would you go to prom with me."

"Of course I will Kazuma."

"What should I wear and what time is it?"

"It's next week on the 5th and just wear something pretty. But that shouldn't be hard for you."

"Oh, stop buttering me up."

"But you know it's true."

"Aww, you're so sweet."

Kiwi was over Angela's house.

"So, how about going to prom with me next week?"

"I'd love to."

He bent over to kiss her.

"Which head should I kiss?"

"It doesn't matter. Because as long as you love me, I don't care."


Marcus spent his time asking all the girls he knew if they would go to the Prom with him and all of them had an extended overenthusiastic way of saying No, go away.

Sanders wasn't all that worried about Prom because he wasn't looking for a date.

Sketch went over to Sergio's house.

"Hey Sergi."

"Sketchy! How have you been."

"Good and yourself?"


"I have to know something."


"Would you like to go to Prom with me?"

"Of course." Sergio wrapped his arms around the Smeargle. Sketch laid his head down on Sergio's chest tuft.

"You're the best Sergio."

Over to John. Alexi his Muk friend came over to study with John. "Umm Alexi..."

"Yeah John?"

"Do you... Like me?"

"Yes, I do."

"Umm but do you-"

"Yes John. I like you, like you."

"Really?" Alexi nodded. "Would you like to come to Prom with me?"

"Sure, I'd like that."

Preparations took a while but on the 3rd everyone was prepared.

On the 4th.

"I asked Sergio and he said yes."

"Same with Alison."

"And Angela."

"What did Sarrah say Octus?"

"She said that she would make it but, I expect her to be a little late..."

"Have a little more faith in me Octus."

"Sarrah?!" The Mudkip walked to Octus and hugged him.

"I can't believe you actually made it."

"I told you Love will find it's way."

"John what about you?"

"Well Alexi said yes."

"Great! Hey wait a minute..."


"What will Lance say?"

"Shit. I forgot all about Lance!"

"Who's Lance?"

"His boyfriend..."

"I do not have a boyfriend! How many times do I have to tell you. I am not gay!"

"Hahaha! We're just messing with you John." He blushed out of embarrassment.

The next day, at the Prom.

Kazuma and Alison were the first of the group to show up.

Next Sanders came alone.

Kiwi and Angela walked through the door and started talking to Sanders, Alison and Kazuma.

Octus escorted Sarrah inside.

"Why thank you Octy." They joined the conversation.

Sergio and Sketch walked in together arm in arm wearing red tied, white shirted, black tuxedos. "Looking spiffy Sketch. and you must be Sergio."

"Pleased to meet you."

John showed up with Alexi. "So this is Alexi, nice." John was surprised they didn't ridicule him.

Finally Marcus showed up. Defeated, exhausted and underdressed.

"Who did you bring Marcus?"

"She should be coming soon. Her name's Dana."

"Uh.. Huh..."

The music came on and everyone and their partners danced. 30 minutes in and Marcus still had no partner and refused to admit he was single. The song had changed to something a bit more fast paced. Another 30 minutes passed by and nearly 3 songs played.

Marcus left knowing that he wouldn't be able to score.

Sanders was a wallflower and was okay with that.

Throughout the night different requests were put on and there were different contests. Half way through it was break time.

Everyone took an hour to just cool off. After the break everyone came back inside and it was a slow dance. Everyone with partners held onto them gently and slowly swayed side to side revolving all the way around to their initial spot.

Lance came out of nowhere and interrupted the song. "John! I can't believe you'd do this to me!"

"Is that Lance?"


"John who's that?"

"My stalker.."

"After all we've been through and I'm still just a stalker to you? I thought we were more? Who is this Muk anyways?"

"Lance this is Alexi. Alexi Lance."

"John control yo man!"

"Lance is not my man! And I'm not gay!"

"Wait, you don't like me John?"

"Alexi I still like you. Wait. You're a guy?"

"I thought you knew? I... Oh man... I thought..."

"You really couldn't tell John?"

"His smell says it all."

"John... If you want me to leave..."

"No, don't go."

"But you're not like that John."

"I still find you attractive."

"I knew you were gay John!"

"Shut it!"

"This would technically consider you gay John."

"Can we just stop talking about this and just dance?" Lance continued to prey upon John for the rest of the night and the couples returned home at the end of the Prom.

John stood in front of a mirror in his house. "Am I bi?"

John is off to College

College is a great achievement. Getting in is a difficult process but staying in is the hard part. John has just been accepted to a prestigious Pokémon University known as UPT. After a tearful goodbye John leaves to Berkeley.

"Okay John, here we are. Your information and registration is all filled out. Now we'll just run a quick search of you using google." They found nothing too far out of the ordinary and then a fanfiction titled John the Dunsparce. "John, would you care to explain what this John the Dunsparce business is about?"

"Oh that was a gift from my friend Sketch for my 17th birthday."

"Mhm. I see." They began reading it. "Oh my. This is quite a work."


"Now you know that if there is anything that we find is suitable for the rest of the students we must announce that right."

"Umm... Yeahh..."

"Good. Now if you get a few awkward stares from people just ignore them and try not to attract too much attention to yourself."

"Okay but I don't know what you mean." John walked outside the admissions offices and then a school wide announcement was made.

"Attention students one of our newest students John, has a fanfiction made about him. If you have the time to you should take a look at it."

John sighed as he knew the day would only be over in a matter of hours. It was nearly 4 o'clock and John stayed in his dorm. He was called into the admissions office. 5 minutes later he walked through the doors and was surprised to see his friends. Octus, Kiwi, Sanders, Kazuma, Marcus, ... Sketch... He shot a glare at him.

"What's the matter?"

"Your stupid Fanfic has people thinking I'm gay now!"

"Hey I'm sorry I didn't people would take it seriously. If you want I could take it down from the site."

"No, it's fine."

"I'll just deal with it, besides it's not like anyone's gonna use your fanfic as a resume"

"You guys wanna tour?"


John went around giving the guys a tour of the campus and the things they don't show you on an average campus tour.

Lance the Ariados came for a visit as well

"Can I help you sir?"

"Yes. I'd like to enroll in this school."

"The System doesn't work like that?"

"Oh. What about for foreign exchange students, I am from Switzerland."

"Oh well in that case it's different."

"Is there anyone here that has recommended this school to you."

"Actually yes. John."

"Ah, well okay. You're enrolled in the school. Would you like to be in your own dorm?"

"That's fine I'll bunk with John."

"Okay, enjoy your stay at UPT."

"I will."

John took the guys out to 'dinner'.

"Tacos yum."

"They're not the best but they're still pretty good."


After 'dinner' John invited them over to his dorm."

"You guys ready to play some Magic?"

"Hell yeah."

"Lets do this!"

They all took out their decks and began dueling.

"So how's the college life treatin' ya so far?"

"Well pretty good on account of it being the first day and we goofed off for pretty much the whole time."


"Ohh let me show you guys some cool poke I met."

"Kay sounds fun."

After they Left Lance went into the Dorm and attached himself to the ceiling.

Hours pass.

"Alright guys it's getting late, see ya."


The six left then John came back to his dorm.

"At least now I don't have to deal with Lance." He crawled over to his bed. The door closed behind him. "Huh?" Lance pinned John down again. "Really?"

"You know it baby."