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From the Northwest Florida Daily News, Section C (Sports), below the fold:

HARRIS OUTED Niceville High Star Athlete Subject of Controversy

Local-boy-made-good star quarterback Bobby Harris figures prominently in a series of photographs put onto the Internet over the last week or so. Although not expressly sexual in nature, the pictures show him in intimate contact with another young male, a tiger recently identified as Malcolm Lamar. Lamar is a freshman who is tutoring Harris in English Literature classes. Questions have been raised regarding the propriety of a university employee engaging with his pupil.

Although Harris and Lamar have been sought after for interviews, neither has been available for comment. The university's Dean of Students, Nelson Williamson, has issued a formal statement in support of Harris and Lamar. Answering the question of impropriety, the Dean observed that Lamar is not an employee of the university but is strictly a volunteer. Head Coach Bruno Stackhouse has also come forward with a statement in support of Harris and Lamar, citing that "nearly all" of the JV team is supportive of Harris. Unconfirmed reports say that Stackhouse has already chosen Harris to be the starting quarterback of the varsity squad next fall.

When asked for comment, Harris' father, Jackson Harris of Niceville FL, refused to speak to reporters. One photographer from the local Niceville paper has filed assault charges after Harris allegedly beat the photographer into unconsciousness. No other family members have come forward...

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FROM: [email protected] <Malcolm Lamar> TO: [email protected]<Lisa Lamar> SUBJECT: Weekend

Dear Mom...

Thanks from both Bobby and me to you and Daniel for bringing down the kitchen supplies, getting the food, and... well, everything. What you said to Bobby... thanks, Mom. We both needed that a lot.

He's let me go through the voicemails on his phone and the emails as well. Some were fine; lots of guys on the team sent emails expressing support. A few of the voicemails were the same, and Bobby's chatted with a few of the guys now. We're hoping this will all calm down after a while, and I'll get to meet the whole team. Bobby even joked that we could meet in the locker room, like all those gay fantasies he'd heard about. I declined. I Gibbs-slapped him first, on your behalf. Besides, although the statistics say that it's likely another few guys in the department may be gay, no one else on the team (or any other team) has said anything yet, so I doubt we'll be planning an orgy anytime soon. (And no - knowing what we know now, I don't think photos would be a good idea...)

While speaking of photos ... Bobby asked me to mention that there's no sense in holding back your own pictures on Facebook or wherever. Every other picture of us together has probably gone viral by now, so you might as well rack up the hit counters as well. And please, Mom... both Bobby and I have sent emails to Duncan, but you may have to remind him, a lot - it's not his fault. And we'll be okay. Unless you have other plans, I figure Bobby and I will both be home for as much of the holidays as we can.

Okay... I've delayed long enough. You want to know about the rest of the voicemails and emails. Several were hang-ups from numbers that we reverse-traced on the Internet to news offices. A few "requested" information or interviews in a manner guaranteed to make me write a specific note of who not to call back. Two were from Beth, Bobby's youngest sister; she was very worried, surprised, but mostly concerned about what she'd heard their father say. (She's finishing up high school, you might remember, still living at home.) There were no calls from his father, but his older brothers, Roy and Wally, left some pretty ugly messages. The nicest thing I could remember either of them saying was from the oldest, Roy, who said something on the lines of "no faggot's gonna be at my wedding, and if you have one, don't expect me to buy you a present." He made some suggestions of what to give to a gay couple. I'll spare you all the details; essential components included castration with dull spoons, matching unsanded, splinter-ridden baseball bats dipped in some kind of acid, and various beatings with anything from bibles and full-sized crosses to a squad of "real males" to beat us both into tiny pieces. I've never heard so much hate in my life, and Wally wasn't much better.

The phone call from Sarah, the older sister, was more calm, but she seemed more concerned about her own reputation in terms of her chances of being accepted into a "good college sorority." She said something about hoping Bobby "comes to his senses" soon. Her email was about the same; all in all, she was more worried about herself than Bobby or the rest of the family. I suspect I'll like Beth, though. In her own email, she went so far as to say that, if Bobby treated me wrong, she's got "dibs on the cute tiger." Not that she'd have much chance of that, but it's nice to be thought of as cute, no matter who says so.

I won't lie, Mom: Some of the emails were direct threats to both of us. I suggested to Bobby that we contact Dean Williams or Coach Stackhouse to know what best to do with those. They coordinated with the local police and FBI (since it probably crossed state lines, literally or electronically), and we forwarded those emails on to them. The ones who sent them will be getting phone calls from one law enforcement agency or another "strongly recommending" that they refrain from making such threats again. That's more than we could have expected, actually. It's ugly speech, but it's still free speech. There's really nothing the law can do unless either of us is actually attacked. Bobby is fast, and stronger than I am, and I still practice my aikido, so don't worry too much. Once these idiots know that they're not anonymous anymore, they'll back down. Of course, the threats were echoed by Roy and Wally; I'm not sure what the police will do with them. Probably nothing - again, unless one of them actually tries something, there's not much that can be done officially. "Domestic issues," they call it. They live farther away from the school (down south, Florida panhandle) than you do. Distance is what kept Bobby from going home over Thanksgiving, and it'll probably keep Roy and Wally away as well. It's a long way to travel just to try to "break his head," as they so charmingly put it.

The email from Bobby's dad was the least threatening, but the most brutal. I've heard of someone "disowning" a child, but I've never seen it done so thoroughly before. It was almost like a series of instructions - never to come home, never to see or contact anyone in any part of the extended family again, not even to set foot in town, if Bobby knows what's good for him. He went so far as to make particular mention that Bobby is being cut out of the will, and that everything in his room will be going to the town dump. Mom, that's his trophies, his old books, whatever clothes he still has down there, everything. I was trying to figure out how to tell him, but when I'd danced around the topic enough, he told me that Beth had already told him that part. She tried to sneak things out of his room as best she could, but she didn't know what to save, and Bobby's father and brothers wasted little time. I think they'd have set fire to everything, if they thought they could do it without burning down the whole house.

So when you said "Welcome home"... thanks, Mom. From both of us.

We'll keep you posted. Finals soon, and then we'll start working on getting home to you.

Love, Mal

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MEMO FROM: Dr. James Bittner, Head of Journalism TO: Nelson Williamson, Dean of Students RE: Rhonda Shelton, SID S31996

Dean Williamson:

I am attaching to this memo a rather informal resignation letter from one of my students, Rhonda Shelton. It would seem that she has elected to take my advice and look for her degree from another university, or perhaps she'll go directly to the tabloids. Since she has not completed her work in her classes in this department, nor do I expect her to take her final examination, university protocol provides that we list her coursework and grade as "Incomplete" until such time as she either does complete her work or fails to by the end of next semester. I don't suspect that she'll do so, and I would be greatly reluctant to have her back.

To ensure the university's position is solidly behind this strictly academic decision, I would suggest that someone in your department archive a copy of the "viral" video of yourself, Coach Stackhouse, and three students that has appeared on the Internet. I have retained the 128Gb chip from young Mr. Stanley Gage's camera with all of the footage that matches up, in time/date stamping, to the video provided to the Internet. This will prove that nothing has been forged, faked, or edited to our favor. I would also recommend keeping a copy of the email that I have printed and attached for you, from Ms. Shelton to me, with a "cc" to a number of other email addresses that she was careless in trying to conceal. The language is somewhat less than courteous (or even properly spelled, I notice), but it does provide veiled threats of various legal actions and was copied to such agencies as the ACLU and the FCC, not to mention Google and other search engines, YouTube, Tumblr, and other such places that the video has been seen to pop up. I believe this to be a quixotic effort to create public sympathy on her behalf; in this, I suspect, she shall fail, even using "standards" set by Rupert Murdoch.

I believe that this information will satisfy the official records. Redact the following if you wish, but I have sufficient tenure and moral standing to say confidently that I'm glad that the filthy, arrogant, lackwitted git shall no longer be poisoning our combined reputations from within. Good riddance, good night, and good luck.

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(excerpt from letter sent from the National Headquarters of the Sigma Omega Delta Sorority)

It has been brought to our attention that a member of your Chapter house, Antonia Baker, was complicit with Lindsey Little, a former Sigma Delta Omega sister, in making public the photographs which have resulted in the "outing" of Bobby Harris and Malcolm Lamar. This sort of behavior will not be tolerated by the national headquarters, and you are directed to dismiss and disavow both Antonia Baker and Lindsey Little from any privileges, housing, or other benefits associated with your chapter of Sigma Delta Omega. Referring to our charter, I cite the following sections of our Code of Conduct... (excerpt of by-laws omitted here)

You are reminded that failure to comply with this directive could negate your university's charter and force the sorority to dissolve your charter. Please notify us of Ms. Baker's removal promptly.

(signed) Bridgett Brumfield Executive Director Sigma Omega Delta Sorority

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(excerpt from letter sent from the law firm of Bozeman, Duckworth, and Dietz)

Dear Dr. Spenser:

As you may recall, my firm represents Mr. Mark Reeves, the young Shepherd involved in the altercation on the football field some weeks ago. My clients are aware (it's a matter of public record, made so at our shared press conference shortly after the incident) that you are treating Mr. Zachary Parker, the other participant, in a professional capacity. Out of civilized respect, and hopes that no further such altercations might occur, on field or off, my clients are concerned about the health and treatment of Mr. Parker. We're quite well aware that there is doctor-patient confidentiality in force, as you are a practicing psychotherapist with all of your credentials and certifications up-to-date. We are not seeking particulars; we only hope for Mr. Parker's continued recovery...

...regarding whatever you feel, as a professional, that it is proper to share. My clients and Mr. Reeve only hope for the best outcome. I've been given leave to tell you that Mr. Reeve is responding well to necessary physical therapy, and he seems to bear no grudge against Mr. Parker...

Sincerely, Valentin VanBuren, Esq. Bozeman, Duckworth, and Dietz

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FROM: [email protected]<Bobby Harris> TO: [email protected]<Lisa Lamar> SUBJECT: Finals Week

Lisa - Just in case Mal didn't tell you, the only people "beating up on us" are our professors; every one of them seems determined to give us one last Scrooge-like kick in the tail. Hopefully, they too will find the same change of heart and be good to us with the final grades!

Mal has had a couple of bodyguards, actually. You met Holm and Velasquez when you visited; they've been escorting Mal everywhere around campus, working it out between their schedules. A few of my other team members have, as Mal put it, "acquired the amazing ability" to be around me whenever I'm on campus. Except when we're here at the apartment, we're never alone.

I've heard some name-calling from across the quad when I'm on campus; in grade school, they'd probably call it bullying, but there's nothing else to it. Mal tells me that he heard someone yell "FAGGOT" at him one day, and that Velasquez - that's the cheetah - put his arm around Mal's shoulders, kissed his cheek, waved at the guy and screamed out, "Hashtag-Love-Wins, asshole!" Holm, my center (the jackrabbit), isn't quite as at-ease with all this, but even he grinned at the response. Mal tells me that some of the students who were milling around actually stopped and applauded.

Oh, and my English lit professor wore a t-shirt to class for finals, with the words STRAIGHT BUT NOT NARROW on it, and a rainbow flag in the background. He's the one, remember when I told you Mal wouldn't let me get away with that half-assed report? That was for his class. Of all my teachers, he probably knows how much Mal has helped me. Academically, and more. I can't say that I got an "easy A" out of that test, either, but I know I did far better than if Mal hadn't been helping.

Now that I know where Faulkner got his title for his book (and just between us, I hated the damned thing!), I can say that there's been a lot of "sound and fury, signifying nothing." The nasty emails are going away, and my Facebook page has more support than not. It might surprise you (shocked the crap out of me!), but my grandmother on my father's side actually congratulated me! Granny Harris has been a rebel from the first. My dad is the youngest of four. When I told Gran what dad had told me ... well, I should just forward her email. Mal described as the best example of "old fashioned country cussing" that he'd ever read.

I can't help worrying about the future, for Mal's sake and mine. But we're together, and you've given me a family to come home to, so I think we'll be okay. I've been reading more about the idea of "being on the right side of history," and I get feeling more confident about it every day, and Mal's even stronger than I am. We're gonna make it.

Hugs, Bobby

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(excerpt from a letter to the Executive Director of Sigma Omega Delta Sorority)

Dear Director Brumfield:

I am the eldest of four Baker sisters (the youngest being Antonia), all of whom are sisters of the Sigma Omega Delta sorority. If you would care to check your records, you will discover that we three who have graduated have been particularly generous to the sorority over the years, and we would hate to think that we should have cause to be less so in the future...

...You shall be receiving letters from other like-minded alumni, all of whom are concerned that their charitable donations may not be well-invested if a tiny, insignificant incident such as Antonia is accused of being involved with should create such a fuss within the Greek community. College pranks and Internet "shaming" are hardly to be considered crimes, especially over something as inconsequential as this...

It's considered an honor and a privilege to be a part of the Sigma Omega Delta sorority, and I think it's time that you weighed carefully the significance of privilege...

Sincerely, Christabel Baker-Marquis

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(excerpt from a letter to Valentin VanBuren, Esq.)

Mr. VanBuren -

I thank you for writing, and I'm delighted to be able to tell you that Mr. Parker is doing very well. As you say, I can't provide any details from actual therapy, but in view of civilized respect (as you so eloquently put it), I can safely say that Mr. Parker is recovering from his own mental injuries, and I am also permitted to say that he bears your Mr. Reese no ill feeling.

I found it interesting, sir, that you referred to Mr. Reese separately from "your clients." Since you deal with many cases at once, perhaps this was simply a slip of the tongue. I feel certain that there are no outside interests involved, for if there were, it would be important - as my role in providing Mr. Parker with proper and complete care - for me to know who they are. As you know, Mr. Parker's history as an orphan and foster child may have some bearing upon his current mental status, and it would be remiss of me if I were not to seek deeply into his past in order to help him in the present...

Quite sincerely yours, Dr. Benedict Spenser PhD JD MSW

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(excerpt from a letter to Christabel Baker-Marquis)

Dear Ms. Baker-Marquis:

I'm sure that, as such a diligent and well-informed member of Sigma Omega Delta, you'll be familiar with both the charter and by-laws governing each chapter as well as the sorority as a whole. In particular, the following wording... (excerpt of by-laws omitted here)

...by which members of a chapter may hold caucus to vote on retention or expulsion of any member deemed unsuitable by at least a three-quarter majority. You may know that, including Antonia Baker, there are currently 53 members of that chapter this semester, making the necessary quorum 40 members (rounded upward). Of those members, by roster vote, one voted for retention (Antonia herself), 49 voted for expulsion, one abstained, and two have resigned from the sorority entirely. I have included copies of their resignation letters, expressing concern that Antonia was (to quote from one of the letters) being "given preferential treatment because of her older sisters."

I am also in receipt of seven letters from former alumni, all expressing doubt about continuing to donate to or otherwise support our sorority. I also have 83 emailed letters, each from a different chapter of our sorority, containing signed petitions representing no fewer than three-quarters of each separate house, recommending that Antonia Baker be expelled from the sorority for her actions. This is the tally that we were able to confirm prior to producing our Christmas newsletter for all of our alumni. I hope that you'll enjoy the prominence of the story being on the front page...

Just as a reminder: Annual alumni dues are payable by February 28 each year, and we are of course open to donations year 'round. I'm sure you'll agree that supporting our sisters as they become politically aware and socially responsible is at the heart of our charter, and that you'll consider your donations to be money well spent...

Sincerely, Bridgett Brumfield Executive Director Sigma Omega Delta Sorority

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FROM: [email protected] <> TO: [email protected] <Benedict Spenser> SUBJECT: The Pup

Do you have to be so obvious when you're stirring the pot, you foolish lizard? Save the pup if you must, but leave the rest alone. You've no idea how far they'll go.

--K

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FROM: [email protected] <Malcolm Lamar> TO: [email protected]<Lisa Lamar> SUBJECT: FREE AT LAST!

Dear Mom...

My first semester of "real college" is done with. My last final was this afternoon, and thank you thank you thank you for letting me take "simpleton math" instead of college algebra; this level, I can understand and still make a grade that won't destroy my GPA entirely!

Some of the guys from the team want to take me and Bobby for dinner at the Rathskeller tonight. I promise no one will get drunk (I don't think Bobby likes beer either, although he'll force a little down if he has to, so he says). We need to be up bright and early tomorrow, pack, and get on the road for home. We're both looking forward to it, believe me. You might even convince us to work a few days at Stripers. I think Bobby just wants to play with the go-karts a while. We'll call when we're on our way. The apartment should be safe while we're gone; we've had promises of looking after it for us from several folks who are staying in town, including Mrs. Purdy next door - the elderly mole who finds "confirmed bachelors" so charming? I do have to chuckle at the clichés, but she's been very kind, and she makes a great afternoon tea. She says she'll trade her recipe for apple-raspberry tarts for your pumpkin pie secrets. Personally, I'd take her up on it.

See you soon.

Love, Mal

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FROM: [email protected] <Benedict Spenser> TO: [email protected]<> SUBJECT: The Pup

I've never known you to destroy all of your aliases, so I'm going to take a guess at one and see if it bounces back. I'll never know what it is that you find charming about that foolish game, except that the alias allows you to lurk amid the young and susceptible online.

You've already helped me, at least twice by now. You didn't want this then, anymore than I want it now. I still don't know why you did it, but at least the pup is alive and has a fighting chance. And me on his side. That's worth more than any conspiratorial cabal that even you could give name to. Just don't help them any further, that's all I'll ask of you, for love of the dragon you once were.

Just what did you think I would uncover after all? RIDDELL me this, Caped Crusader... What can be swallowed, but can also swallow you?

You might remind your former client of that one...

Benedict