The Life of Another - Chapter 22

Story by Jake Atkinson on SoFurry

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#26 of The Life of Another

Whew, finally got it done! Libre Write, my word processor, threw a hissy-fit because I asked it to play with Microsoft Word. On top of that I've been more than a little pressed for time. As a result, please forgive the font changes between scenes as well as a few format/font related issues.

I figured since I was taking so long anyway I'd go ahead and take even longer by bothering to give it a more standard, dialogue oriented structure. Hopefully that will make the conversations a little easier to follow. ^^

Oh, also, I unexpectedly received a few pictures from a reader! Feel free to stop by the new folder I created for fan art to check them out. If anyone else would like to add their take on some of the characters, drop me a note and I'd be happy to add them along with a link to your profile.

Thanks for your continuing patience and support!


P.O.V. - Nick - a few minutes prior to Roger falling asleep

Hey, I think he likes that Coyote. Can't say I blame him! I settled into the chair and felt Roger's warmth along my side and found a certain pleasure in his heavier than usual scent.His aroma and closeness left me feeling cozy and content as I imagined the two of us spending our first night together. Heh, he's getting all sleepy. This is fun, I knew if he'd just focus on the show it would help him relax. My eyes momentarily closed and I drifted happily into a state of drowsiness until some of the girl's raised tones snapped me out of it.

Oh geez, there go Amanda and Kriana again! I hope they don't stir up Roger, I think he might be asleep. The shirtless Coyote's scene ended and the TV's volume escalated as a commercial for fur conditioner clamored for everyone's attention.Erf, Kriana has the remote. Ah well... hey, I wonder why they don't use male models to advertise products like th __is? That Vixen is __pretty enough but it wouldn't hurt to see a guy in some of th_ ese_ads, we have fur too!

Without warning, my senses were suddenly assaulted by an overwhelming, deep-seated anger. I reflexively leaped from the chair with a yelp just as the already dim lights pulsed into darkness and the TV flickered and failed. At the same time, Roger's electric blue-white aura lit the room but it was interrupted by impossibly black bands that rolled quickly down from his head to his paws. If the source had been anyone but Roger I would have run for my life. Instead, I fought the instinct and lunged to grab the enraged Wolf by his shoulders. "Roger! Wake up!"

P.O.V. - Roger

I jolted into consciousness with Nick's terrified face only inches from my muzzle as he exclaimed "Wake up!"

Momentarily disoriented, I sat up with a start. "Huh? What's going on?!"

Nick's ears were flat back and the whites of his eyes shone in bright rings despite the dim lighting. "You were dreaming and your aura was getting all... scary."

Amanda had jumped up into a squat on the couch and was clutching a sofa cushion to her chest. "Scary?! You were snarling and glowing and the power was flickering off!"

In the pause that followed, the TV screen flared into life with a reboot message from the DVR and I struggled to collect my thoughts. That's right, I was thinking about Thad! Holy sh#t, did I connect?! I don't think so but with this stupid emotional connection I can never be sure! "Er, ah... sorry. Jim's mentioned I can put on quite a show when I'm sleeping. I dunno about the power dimming though."

Casey's bushy tail curled around into her lap where she held it with both hands as she said "That was allot more than a show!"

Amanda's huge ears were plastered down as she joined in her friend's distress. "Yeah! And you mean to say you do that every night?! What about Jim?!"

Suddenly self-conscious, I fought to find words for answers I didn't have. The silence that followed in the wake of my hesitation hung in the air uncomfortably until the DVR finished rebooting and canned laughter from an inane sitcom filled in the background. Unable to come up with anything, I simply lowered the recliner's pawrest and rose from the chair. "I'm really sorry guys. I used to be a master at going unnoticed but ever since..." I trailed off and sighed heavily. "I guess I should get up to my room."

Casey's tone dropped some if it's earlier edge. "You don't have to leave, it's just that we're kinda... shocked. I've seen you plenty of times when just your tail was glowing. What makes all the other stuff happen?"

I had yet to put my shoes back on and unconsciously scrunched the pads of my toes back and forth against the rug. "If my emotions run high enough, I light up... different emotions, different effects. It used to take really strong emotions but the threshold seems to be dropping and I can't really control it. Like just now, if you were me, you'd be flickering like a strobe light until you calmed down."

Amanda patted the couch cushion back into place as she commented "That still doesn't explain the lights OR the TV. That could be dangerous!"

Kriana seemed to enjoy debating with Amanda and jumped at the bait before I could respond. "Oh big deal! The lights dimmed and the TV went off. It was for like, three seconds! Passing thunderstorms have done way more than that."

Amanda crossed her arms. "Yeah, well... It was still SUPER freaky! What were you dreaming about anyway Roger? It must have been something pretty wild to cause all that."

Being reminded of the dream made me feel angry in a way. After years of dealing with the same nightmare this was the first time it had taken a different path. Logically I knew it was just a dream but I still felt somehow cheated that Nick woke me up just as I was about to finally stop Thad. To stall for time I said, "I uh, don't usually remember my dreams that well."

Nick slid into the chair and gently pulled at my arm, inviting me to sit down with him again. "You were pretty worked up, you must remember something."

P.O.V. - Nick

Roger gave in to my touch and sat down at the edge of the chair beside me where he took a deep, slow breath before responding. "Have you guys seen that video of Thad Beaumont?"

The girls seemed confused and I couldn't place the name either. "Uh, It doesn't sound familiar. Why?"

Roger's gaze shifted around the room briefly and then landed on me as he replied. "That one the Fox was talking about, where Thad is caught running over Will... that Wolf."

I looked to the girls again and they seemed as perplexed as I was. Amanda lowered her paws to the floor and shifted into a more relaxed posture as she faced us to say "What Fox?"

Roger turned towards the Sand Cat and replied "That news anchor that came on during the commercials. I don't remember it that well... Kriana, can you rewind it a little? Maybe they showed a clip."

Kriana wielded the remote like a pro and only a few moments passed before she had the show cued up where we left off. It was paused on a car commercial but the images quickly changed as she rewound the recording. The fur conditioner ad passed by and then she paused it again as the last scene from the show filled the screen. "I don't see it. Was it in the other commercial break?"

Roger's pensive mood shifted into one of anxiety, although he hid it well. He had a strange way of clamping down on his emotions at times and the flickering in his aura flared only briefly. "No, I guess that was part of the dream too. Weird... I uhhh... must have seen it on the internet. Anyway, it was kind of a graphic video... gave me bad dreams. Guess I'm just an old softie."

Roger's penchant for secrecy irked me but I felt more forgiving this time. He knows I can tell when he's lying. Why not talk about a dream? We're just curious. Maybe he's just uncomfortable talking with the girls. I'd better not press for it now or he'll run upstairs for sure. "That happens to me sometimes too, besides it's only natural to have a bad dreams after being up all night."

Theresa's rounded ears rolled downward sympathetically. "Why were you up all night Roger?"

Roger scratched at the back of his neck and looked away. "Oh, you know how it is, sometimes it's just hard to stop thinking about stuff. Sorry if I scared you guys. I know it's freaky, but it's harmless. It wouldn't have happened if I hadn't drifted off and I'm REALLY awake now. You don't have to worry about a repeat performance."

I sensed that while most of the girls were settling down, Amanda was still upset. Of the group, I always had the hardest time getting along with her and it appeared as though Roger wasn't fairing much better. She wasn't glaring at him outright but her tight shoulders and flitting tail made her mood obvious as she spoke. "Yeah well... be more considerate. If you know that kind of stuff happens when you fall sleep then don't let yourself drift off when people are around. You aren't a toddler, you can control when you take a nap."

Roger's flickering aura flared anew and I was just about to jump to his defense when Kriana beat me to it. "Oh lighten up Amanda! He just got done telling you he can't control it and if you had been up all night you'd probably drift off too! Let's just drop it and get back to the show. We can still finish the episode before our reservation is up."

Amanda could see that the mood in the room was not in her favor and slipped into a pout. "Fine, just... be more careful."

Roger unconsciously chewed at his lip and the way he hovered at the edge of the seat had me convinced he was about to leave. After everything that had transpired last night I wasn't about to let that happen and drew him back into the recliner with me where I whispered into his ear. "Come on, we got this... just concentrate on the show. If you get too sleepy, I'll give you a nudge."

Roger nodded and flipped up the pawrest before rolling onto his side so his back was towards the couch. While we were close, we weren't quite touching and I was sure it was because he was worried about making another spectacle of himself. Meanwhile, as we settled in, Kriana had resumed the program but a quiet tension still hung in the air. I knew if I could get the ball rolling everyone would lighten up and luckily I had a flash of inspiration when the shirtless Coyote re-entered the story. Geez, this is kinda forward but desperate times call for desperate measures! "Has Jasper NOT had a shirtless scene in this episode?"

Kriana responded from the chair opposite us. "Oh come on, you know you love it!"

I smiled shyly and engaged part two of my plan by shifting my position so the side of my butt pressed against Roger's crotch. I wasn't far enough on my side to be spooning but it still had the desired effect as I replied "I guess if I had a body like that I'd wanna show it off too."

Amanda wasn't able to see what I was up to from her angle but Casey caught it and subtly elbowed Theresa. Suddenly, unbeknownst to Roger, we had their undivided attention. I pretended not to notice and gently squirmed against the Wolf as he whispered into my ear. "He's got nothing on you... and you should show off your body more... like, right after the program." I could feel Roger's growing excitement pressing against my rear and he tried to pull away but the armrest prevented his retreat. "And stop that! You're giving me a hard-on."

I gave him a last, playful bump and slid forward so we weren't touching anymore. In response, he gave my arm a squeeze and started to relax. There, finally... everyone's feeling better!

P.O.V. - Roger 12:40 pm Wednesday - Hallway in front of the Admin Office

Tami's voice echoed in the empty hall behind me. "Hey Roger, you know you can't be here. The lunch bell sounded a few minutes ago. If someone sees us together I'll have to write you up. Quick, get around the corner and I'll go upstairs."

I turned and held out my pass. "Do not assail me lowly guard. I have papers that bear the royal seal!"

She checked the time stamp on the hall pass and glanced back up. "You're certainly upbeat, and you're talking... what gives?"

I smiled and stuffed the note into the back pocket of my recently acquired pants. They still had that distinctive 'new jeans' smell and the fabric felt stiff against my fingers. "I just finished retaking my placement tests, the doctor said it's ok to talk and thanks to awesome people like you I have clothes that actually fit!" For added affect, I struck a pose mimicking the style of a magazine model by twisting at the waist and pointing to an imaginary spot off camera.

Tami laughed and swatted my butt. "Lookin' sharp Rog! Never seen you so... happy."

"I know, right? Amazing what a good night's sleep and properly sized underwear can do for a guy."

Tami's ears swiveled as she caught the sound of my stomach growling. "I've got a route I have to patrol but you can walk with me. Come on, we'll go right by the cafeteria."

"Ok" I said and fell in step beside her as we continued our conversation.

"So" she said "What's with having to retake your placement tests?"

"I uh, kinda botched the tests on purpose the first time around so they stuck me in some pretty basic classes. I've been breezing through them and, long story short, some of my teachers complained to the administrative staff that I was improperly placed."

She tipped her head questioningly and asked "...and having to retake all those tests makes you happy because... ?"

We reached the exterior door and I held it open for her as we stepped outside. The cool Spring air smelled alive and fresh after being couped up in the admin office all morning and I reveled in it momentarily before responding. "Because... I'm not sure exactly. I mean I totally aced 'em but I suppose that means I'll get stuck with harder classes and more homework. Now that you mention it, it is kinda odd."

She bumped my shoulder with hers and said "Ah don't let me pop your balloon. After all you've been through you're entitled to a good mood or two, logic be damned."

"Oh, it's not you." I said "I just get paranoid about mood swings when I've been around Ms. Thurlington. I got called into her office this morning to talk about the tests and now you've got me wondering."

Tami kept a sharp eye out for interlopers but held up her end of the conversation. "Wondering about what?"

"It's hard to explain unless you know what her talent is. Did you know she can affect people's moods, inhibitions... stuff like that?"

She narrowed her gaze at me skeptically. "Are you sayin' that she can do mind control stuff? That seems pretty out there Rog."

"No," I said with an eye roll "not like that. She can't make you think that chocolate tastes like pizza but she can change the way you feel when think about pizza." I noticed the look in her eye and smiled. "I guess that does sound crazy huh?"

She laughed and said "Rog, I never really considered you a bastion of sanity to begin with so no real loss there."

I surprised myself by playfully punching her in the arm. "See?! I don't go around punching people in the arm and yet BAM, I just did! I've been feeling down right chipper ever since I started taking that test. I'm so happy and self-assured it's creepin' me out." I added an overly dramatic flair to my still husky voice. "You've gotta help me! That Fox is in my brain!"

"No way! When it comes to deviant Arctic Foxes with psychic powers, you're on your own. Hey, here's the cafeteria. You ahhh, want some company till you get to the table?"

I waved off her concern and flashed a playful grin. "Ah I'll be fine. I'm Roger Evans. What could possibly go wrong?"

Tami cocked an ear at me and squinted. "On second thought, maybe you should eat at your dorm. The food court is probably closed by now anyway."

Indeed, the door proved locked when I gave it a tug. "Ya know, I think you have a point. I'd better lie low for awhile. If people see me like this they'll think I've been possessed by that guy from Blue's Clues."

"Come on" Tami said as she led us away from the cafeteria "stick with me so you don't have to deal with any other Hall Monitors. I've gotta swing by the William Lachlan building first though. Someone keeps defacing the sign. Like the people living there don't have enough problems!"

Hey, I thought, _that's the building they dedicated to my nephew!_I had been avoiding the building ever since I arrived. Just imagining the plaque with his name on it usually brought up all sorts of emotions that I had no intention of dealing with but today my mindset was different. "I haven't really been over to that part of the campus before. What's the deal with the sign?"

We turned down a walkway to our left and Tami waved to an Ermine in the distance whose white fur was just starting to shift towards brown for the change in seasons. He smiled and cupped his hands around his muzzle to yell "Caught one eheh?"

I winced as Tami hollered back, oblivious to the fact that my ears were only a few centimeters away. "Naw, he has a pass! The food court was closed so I'm taking him to his dorm but I gotta check the Lachlan building first! You land any?!"

The Mustelid held up his hand in a "0" gesture and shrugged to which Tami responded "Ahw, you'll get one yet! Check behind the gym, near the Auto Shop. Caught someone smoking there once!"

He nodded and waved and we continued on our way while Tami addressed my question. "Sorry about that. Poor guy, been at it all semester and still hasn't made his first catch. Anyway, you were asking about the Lachlan building. It's been a problem for awhile now. Someone keeps scrawling "Barn" and other crap around the entrance. Sometimes they use spray paint, other times some sort of over-sized black marker."

I furrowed my brow. "What's the point in that? And there's cameras everywhere, can't security just check the recordings?"

She led us around a bend in the path and then we hooked right. I could see the side of the two story brick structure in the distance and, for the first time, didn't feel a need to veer away. Tami pointed to it as she talked "There's really only one camera facing the main doorway and they know where is. They shimmy up the pole and spray shaving cream on the dome around the camera so all we see is a hand and a can of Surgi-Shave. That's the only clue we have. We did an inventory in the medical wing and, sure enough, two missing cans. Whoever it is must have had access at some point but it could have been a patient, a student rotating through for physiology credit or cleaning staff or... well just about anyone really. They lock up the drugs but never really had a need to track stuff like that before."

I rubbed at my muzzle. "Isn't there a camera that aims towards the camera they cover up?"

She shook her head. "Close, but no. We've played back every angle that might give us a clue but whoever it is knows the gaps and they come at all times of day. Security is gonna install another camera soon but in the mean time it's up to us!" She pulled at her Hall Monitor badge jokingly.

I could tell she was kidding but at the same time it was obvious she took her job seriously and my tail wagged at her enthusiasm. It made me feel good to know people were watching out for my nephew's building. "But what's with the barn reference? I mean, what's this building even for?" I asked.

The path swung wide before curving sharply towards the main entrance and I was relieved to see it was graffiti free. William's name hung over the double-doors in bronze letters and I felt a mix of loss and sorrow as my gaze came to rest on the granite plaque bearing his portrait and a short Buddhist saying written in Pali. At the time I requested they dedicate a building in his name I hadn't specified any particular structure. That they chose this one had me wondering if they knew more about him than I realized. My earlier upbeat mood slipped into more somber territory but at the same time I, for once, was thankful for Ms. Thurlington's ministrations. As haphazard as they were they had finally given me the ability to confront William's memorial without the threat of falling completely to pieces or causing a scene. I raised my hand and gently brushed my fingers across the letters of the deeply engraved stone slab while Tami talked.

"That's right, I forget you're new here. This is essentially an apartment building. They made it for people whose deviances are so severe they can't function out in the world after they graduate. You know, people who might accidentally set someone on fire or shatter glass when they get scared... stuff like that. Then there's the ones like Brandon... with hooves or horns or even scales. It's mostly empty as I understand it, which I suppose is a good thing, but the few people that live here have it hard enough without having the Purists mocking them. Sometimes they call 'em ferals, other times they make references to barns or zoos.. crap like that." Tami noticed my interest in the writing and commented "No one seems to know what that says. I think it's Farsi or Hindi or something like that."

"It's Pali" I replied in quiet tones. "Roughly translated it says 'Death is but our awakening from the dream of life.'"

"Holy Crap Rog, you can read those scribbles?" she said with genuine astonishment.

"I used to be able to, kinda lost the knack for it now though. I uh, just recognized it because it's a famous quote." I snapped out of my reverie and realized my overt interest and sudden mood change might look odd so I forced a smile and a joking tone. "What, you mean you never studied ancient languages just for fun?! Maybe a little Aramaic when you thought no one was looking... or a late night binge of Sanskrit with a couple friends?"

"Rog" she replied "you are one seriously odd duck! Come on, let's get to the dorms."

P.O.V. - Ms. Thurlington - Admin Office - 1:05 pm

The Black Panther rose quickly from her desk "Oh here, let me help you with that Sarah."

"Thanks Kathryn" I said as I relinquished the cardboard tray bearing our drinks from the cafeteria. "I almost dropped those twice, the trays are so flimsy. Oh, and here's your Surf n' Turf Special too. I really appreciate you sacrificing your lunch break to proctor for Roger while he takes his tests. Where is he anyway? I got him the Enchilada Platter."

Mrs. Patterson accepted the paper sack and replied with a casual tone. "He finished about a half hour ago. I happened to overhear when you mentioned he could take the day off after he completed all of the tests so I gave him a pass."

I quickly set down the rest of my burden from the cafeteria and replied "What... you mean he's gone?! But I said I'd get lunch for everyone!"

Kathryn's voice took on a maternal tone. "Sarah, I was sitting right here beside him and I don't remember that."

She can be so condescending. I hate it when she gets like this. She makes me feel like I'm seven years old again! My voice raised defensively. "I said it as I walked right between your desks!"

She crossed her arms over her chest and her tail tossed behind her as she retorted "He was in the middle of writing his second essay. He was probably so intent on his work that you could have told him the building was on fire and he wouldn't have heard you. And you know how I'm always on the phone. Anyway, it's no big deal. I'll have one of the students run it up to his dorm. If he's already had lunch he can save it for supper."

"It's not the food I'm worried about." I said with a huff. "It's that... well it doesn't matter. Did he say where he was going?"

She narrowed her eyes and folded her ears. "Sarah, I've known you since you were nine. I know what it means when your tail flips like that. Now what, exactly, doesn't matter?"

"Kathryn, I am twenty-eight years old and I don't think it's appropriate when you address me like that." I said as I fought to bring down my rising temper.

The Panther put her hand to her muzzle as she tried to suppress a laugh. "You always get angry when you've been caught with your hand in the cookie jar. But you're right, I'm sorry. You've been a part of my life for so long I tend to forget that you're all grown up. Now, what's got you on edge?"

Before I could respond, the office door opened and my 1:15pm appointment walked in. The Wolf timidly stepped up to the counter and waited silently for one of us to address her. I took a breath to compose myself and forced a smile. "Hello Kelly. You're right on time but I'm afraid something unexpected has come up. Would you mind going back to class and returning next period? At say... 2:15pm?"

She scratched absent-mindedly at her cheek ruff and I was struck by how well her pastel blue ventral fur played off the more normal gray shades above her eyes. "Uhm, ok."

The shy Wolf spoke so softly I barely caught it. Hmmm, she seems rather down. Looks like I'll have to make some adjustments. At least hers are easy, no talent related interference and she's totally oblivious to what I'm really doing during the pen trick. If only Roger was so easy. Roger! That's right! I've gotta find him before someone gets hurt! "Thank you for being so understanding Kelly, I'll see you soon."

She lifted her hand in the slightest of waves and slipped out the door in near silence as I turned to face Kathryn again. "Sorry about that, I completely forgot about her appointment. Look, it's important I find Roger right away, we can go over the 'why' later. The cafeteria is closed now and he's been excused from classes so I'm guessing he's probably in his dorm. While I head over there would you please send him an email requesting he report back here?"

"Alright Sarah" she said as she sat back down at her terminal and began typing "but if it's that important don't you think we should issue an emergency broadcast?"

"He doesn't have a phone so he won't get it and if he's in the dorm I don't know if anyone would be there to notify us." I picked up Roger's food and headed for the door. "I'll call you when I get there and if he's not around then we'll go all out, ok?"

Kathryn let out with a worried sigh. "Alright, in the mean time I'll try to reach David."

"Ok" I said and dashed out the door.

P.O.V. - Roger - Dorm Room 1:25 pm

The early afternoon sun streamed warmly through the beveled glass panes of my dorm window and the refracted light danced around my bare paws in tiny rainbows. After a slow stretch, I leaned back in the chair and lazily enjoyed the warmth on my fur as I let my mind wander. Ahh, it's almost magic when the air is cool but the sun is warm. Hmm, if I lie down on the floor I'd be completely in the sun. That'd be perfect for a nice, quiet nap before classes let out. Without a second thought, I sprawled out on the floor and used one of Jim's cast off shoes as a pillow. Now this is alright!_I let my arms fall to my sides to get as much sun as possible and replayed the days events in my mind. _Ya know, Tami's an alright Wolf. If we both weren't so damn gay we'd make a cute couple. I laughed softly to myself. Thanks to her I'm already in a good mood again, well her and a certain Fox. Suddenly there's so much I want to do! What's been holding me back? F#ck classes! I should sneak off campus with Nick and... My line of thinking was abruptly interrupted as Ms. Thurlington threw open the door of my room.

"Roger, there you are!" She gasped and put a hand over her muzzle. "Are you alright?!" The frightened Arctic Fox moved to kneel beside me where she dropped a white paper sack on the floor and began frantically dialing her phone.

I propped myself up on my elbows and cocked an ear in her direction. "Woah... hey don't knock or anything Sarah, just come on in." I said with more than a hint of sarcasm. "And I hope you're not calling emergency services or something, I'm fine. Hey, that smells good! Whatchya got in the bag?"

Ms. Thurlington's ears flitted back as her concern seemed to turn more towards irritation and she began to speak into the phone. "Hello Mrs. Patterson. ... Yes, I've found Roger, we're in his dorm room now. ... Everything's fine, I'll be back in time for my next appointment. ... Alright, thank you." She ended the call and rose from her squat beside me before setting down her phone on Jim's desk and smoothing her black, business-length skirt into place. "You gave me a bit of a scare Roger. What are you doing on the floor? Oh, and that's your lunch by the way... the one I said I'd pick up for you."

I sat up and scooted across the rug so I could lean back against my desk while still enjoying the warmth of the sun. "Geez Sarah, no need for the testy tone! Did you say that while I was working on the essays? I kinda get wrapped up in my thoughts sometimes. I guess I didn't hear you. Hey, I totally nailed that second essay by the way! F#ck, who am I kidding? I flew through the whole thing! Well, except for some of the math. Base 10 blah blah blah... never could get the hang of logarithms. Not like I'll ever need that in real life anyway."

The marbled black and white Fox pulled up Jim's chair and sat down with crossed knees as she addressed me. "Roger, sometimes learning things like that can be useful in ways you don't expect. Anyway I..."

"Oh, come on!" I interjected "When's the last time you needed to graph a conic section, find the cosine of an angle or express a log in expanded form? We've only got so many hours in our lives. Time spent learning stuff that has a zero point one percent chance of being useful is just wasteful when there's so much else out there!"

She sighed forcefully and locked her fingers over her knee. "Please stop interrupting me. Now look, I normally wouldn't be so tolerant of such impolite behavior but, given the circumstances, I..."

"Don't take that tone with me! If you don't like the way I'm acting right now you've only got yourself to blame." Her ears shot forward and she opened her mouth to speak but I kept up my momentum. "Yeah... I know what you did! No sense in being coy about it. But you can relax, for once I'm actually happy with the results. In fact, I haven't been this happy in... forever! It was kinda creepy at first but now I'm getting into it. To answer your earlier question, that's why I was on the floor when you came in. The sun was so nice and warm I decided to take a nap in it. I wouldn't normally do that. I'd be all 'It might look weird if I lie down on the floor and floors are kinda dirty so I guess I won't... woe is me.' But now, BAM, I can actually enjoy it! Frankly, I've gotta thank you. I realize now I've got this whole life in front of me and I can't go around wasting it, holding back because of what people might think or what might be 'risky.'" I made air quotes with my fingers as I said the last word and suddenly realized how hungry I was. "Oh, and thanks for the lunch. That was really thoughtful. It smells like Mexican. I LOVE Mexican food!" I rose and retrieved the sack she brought up.

The counselor seized the moment of silence made available while I was distracted and resumed talking while I unpacked the bag on my desk. "Roger, listen to me. I don't mean to burst your bubble but you can't stay this way. I... I was worried you'd do poorly on the tests again and I thought if I bumped up your confidence and helped a bit with your self-expression it would provide more accurate results. I had intended to set things back to normal when you finished but you took off before I had the chance."

I popped the lid off of the oval, plastic platter and was delighted by the sight and smell of two cheesy enchiladas lying in a pool of sauce and partially congealed grease. I grabbed the spork and dug in, talking around mouthfuls of food. "Ahh don't worry about it. This is AMAZING by the way! Did you have this? No, I suppose you got a salad. You always keep those hips tight. Heh, I'll bet they're fuel for more than a few student's frenzied fantasies!" My ears shot down and I dropped my face into my hand. "Oh my god, I can't believe I just said that! I guess, that's the whole 'heightened self-expression' thing huh?"

She smiled and the way her tail danced made it clear she was more than a little flattered. "You see? That's just one example of what I'm talking about. There could be all sorts of consequences if you stayed this way. It was safe in the controlled confines of the admin office, but that's all." She unlocked her hands and leaned to the side to rest her elbow on an armrest. "It's pretty obvious I overshot the mark and affected a few other things too. I'll be honest with you, the interference from your connection... it's like trying to type on a keyboard where the keys shift position every time your heart beats. And it's getting worse. Even when you're relaxed and totally unaware of what I'm doing, like this morning, it's still a delicate affair."

I wiped sauce from my muzzle with a napkin and replied "Then don't do it! You're the only counselor in the whole world who seems to think they have to go poking around like that. It's not just morally reprehensible, it's dangerous! Look, how long do your 'adjustments' usually last? How about we just stop and let them fade away so I can be me again? I'll still come in for my appointments and, for once, you can treat me like NORMAL counselors treat their students, ok?"

She measured her patience with a long breath and responded "If only it were that easy but I don't think you understand the severity of the situation. I'm convinced that all of your repressed emotions are building up inside of you and, because you're emotionally connected, so is an inordinate amount of power. Eventually something is going to happen and people will get hurt. That's why we were pushing so hard for your baseline testing yesterday. None of us can figure out what's happening to all that power. Normally, emoter's derive their power from their emotions, so a strong emotion allows them to draw power at a higher level. The thing is, they can't store it. Let's say they could shoot fire balls. If they got angry they could focus and shoot really big fire balls. However, once the strong mood passes, they're done. They can't save some power for later. Also, if they get emotional and don't focus on it, nothing happens. They just experience an emotion like anyone else and that's it. You, Roger, are making us rewrite the book."

"What's the big deal? So I flicker and flash... as long as I don't connect, nothing happens. So, I won't connect, problem solved." I straightened my back and slid down in the chair, enjoying the afterglow of my meal despite her attempts to kill my good mood.

"I'm sorry, but you're wrong. You ARE connected, all the time! Emoters like you generally have a sort of background connection that flows along with their emotions and, while you may THINK you're connecting what you're really doing is just focusing on something that's always there. Intellectually and Spiritually connected people can sometimes completely disconnect and connect like you're talking about, but not you. Then again, it was thought that only Spiritual connectors could store power on a large scale... until you came along."

I drummed my fingers idly while my hand rested atop my forearm. "So what you're say is, whenever I'm repressing a strong emotion I'm somehow connected, even though I don't think I am, and that I'm storing some of the power, even though that's generally considered impossible." I waved a hand dismissively and continued. "And to top it off, you're convinced that someday I'll be retaining so much power that a fly will land on my ear and when I try to repress that little bit of irritation... BLAMO! I'll pull a Mr. Creosote."

Ms. Thurlington narrowed her gaze and cocked an ear disapprovingly. "I'm not sure what a 'Mr. Creosote' is but I think I get the picture. And yes, that is exactly what I'm saying. That's why I think it's imperative for me to get you back into a safer frame of mind. It's either that or we move you into the training room until we can determine that you're not a risk."

There, she finally did it! She totally killed my buzz! The world just can't stand ol' Roger being happy for once! Despite my new found confidence a moment of caution came to me from somewhere. Hmm, I wonder if she has a point though. __I_ t does explain the ever increasing problem with my aura_. But how could that make the lights go dim? A strong emotion would mean throwing off energy, which would make them brighter. Wait, no... I get it! If I. _.._ ugh... I'm not feeling right... what's going on?! I refocused my attention on the Fox and noticed one of her hands was behind her back. "Hey!" I suddenly felt as if I were in a stupor and struggled to get out of the chair only to find myself sliding to the floor. "What are you doing?!" I said with a slur.

She was obviously concentrating and now that she knew she was caught she pulled her hand back into view as she gestured. "I'm sorry Roger, I noticed the interference was lower and I had to jump while I had the chance. I clearly missed the mark though... just bear with me a minute and I'll have everything under control."

S __tupid Fox! Could've at least warned me! My emotions swung wildly from one feeling to another as she repeatedly over-corrected various adjustments. "Sarah... Ms. Thurlington... you're starting to make me... I think I'm gonna puke." Despite my discomfort, my speech no longer slurred and I realized I had enough motor control to climb back into the chair. After a few moments passed I felt more settled and realized she was done. My sense of new found purpose and confidence was gone but I had to admit I felt more like my old self, which I wasn't too happy about.

The counselor leaned heavily onto her armrest and panted gently. "I'm so, so sorry Roger. I promise I won't ever do that without your consent again. However, thanks to what I just did, you'll be safe until tomorrow's baseline test. If I'm right, you should feel allot better after you've had a chance to blow off some of that stored up energy. And, I'm guessing your unwanted flickering will go down too." She offered a tired but self-satisfied smile and added "Don't worry, it will all have been worth it, trust me."