Pokemon Mayhem Episode 1
#1 of Pokemon Mayham
Story done many of years ago as more of fun then anything else. Also to see what me and my friends would come up with by staying up late, we have no memories of what we wrote. All the proof we had that what transpired is what's here. The funny part is we did this many of times, those were fun times.
Even though i put this as adult, I'd say it would go somewhere in between all ages and adult. Since there's no option for such I'm just going to leave it as such, mostly language, mild violence. Which kind of at the time putting "18" or older was kind of funny since i was under that age at the time :P
Hello, If your reading this story that I uploaded in 2015 of June I like to welcome you to what is me growing up and writing my first attempt at a story.
I know there is a lot of spelling errors, but I wrote this back in when I was 12-13 years old(currently in my 30's). This is what happens when you and some friends get together, stay up til 3-4 am in the morning, on a sugar high from Snack'ums(if these were before you time then look them up, we mainly got the Corn-pops)and soda. You basically get pure non-sense.
I state "18" or older below, but I was tired and never looked back. I wanted to keep this in it's original state as it was typed back then.
SO ENJOY! ... I hope...
Pokemon Mayhem 1
You must be 18 or older to read this. Blah Blah Pokemon belongs to Nintendo and blah blah and all that other legal stuff. So I will stop talking so you can get to the story hell you probable already past this part. Good for
on with the FUCKIN' STORY
Here we join Ash and Company just arriving back at Pallet town. They are on they're way to Prof. Oaks lab to give him the G.S. Ball since its been a while since they went to Valencia Island and got it from Prof. Ivy. Ash has won at the orange league competition and got back Pidgeot,and Butterfree. Ash meets up with Gary and they have a little battle. It was Pikachu vs. Eevee WOULD YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP, DIIIIIIEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!
The Director pulls out a sword and dices the narrator to bits.
Director: Yay now I can get back to my story.
Ash is now at his house.
Ash's Mom: So Ash dear where is Brock at? Oh Hi Tracy it's nice to meet you again.
Ash: Brock isn't here because he decided to stay with Prof. Ivy to learn more about Pokemon.
Brock: HEY GUY'S I'M RIGHT HERE YOU CAME BY AND PICKED ME UP
REMEMBER!!!!!!!!!
Misty: Hey Ash it's getting late we should get some sleep.
Brock: STOP IGNORING ME!!!!!!!
Tracy: Yeah Misty's right Ash I don't know about you but I got to get up before 9:00 am tomorrow to help Prof. Oak.
Ash: I'll go to bed soon, but I want to watch some TV first.
Ash's Mom: Ash get to bed!
Ash: Oh, okay.
Ash, Misty, and Tracy all went to bed. Ash snuck out of bed to watch TV, but Ash's Mom found that he was up and sent him right back to bed.
The Next Morning...
Mechanical Dodrio Cock-a-doodle-do (Blows up.)
Ash: HAHAHAHA TAKE THAT!!!!!!! I'M TRYING TO SLEEP!!!!!!!
Director: ??? Ok who gave Ash a weapon of mass-destruction?
Ash: I borrowed it from Earl.
Earl: YOU WHAT!!!!! PREPARE FOR YOUR DOOM!!!!!!
Earl is chasing Ash around the set firing a hale storm of bullets and rockets at him.
Director: Hey I need him for the next scene.
Earl: FUCK YOU!!!
Director: Uhhh, Oh... kay Well don't make to much of a mess... never mind, too late.
The set is now is filled with holes and is on fire.
Director: ...................................???? MY STUDIO!!!!!
NNNNOOOOOO!!!!!!
Misty and Tracy were up but unfortunately Ash was still asleep.(even though he is out side and has blown up the Mechanical Dodrio and is now being chased by Earl.) They Tried to wake him up but all attempts failed.(Duh, cuz his not fuckin' there)
Misty: Wake up Ash it's time for breakfast.(I feel dumb talking to a person not even here)
Tracy: It's No Use. (Duh)
Ash: I'm Back. (Not for long though)
Director: I'll kill you Ash if you don't get back in bed.
Earl: NOT IF I GET TO HIM FIRST!!!!!!
Ash's mom: Don't you dare touch him.
Earl: I'll let him slide this time BUT IF HE EVER DOES IT AGAIN.
Director: (to Ash's mom)You shut the fuck up or I'll kill you too.
Earl: WHAT DID YOU SAY!!!!!!
Director: AAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! DON'T HURT ME!!!!!!!!!
Starts to run for his life.
Misty:(idea) I Know!(Lets go grab a bite to eat)
Misty went over to Pikachu and tried to wake him up. Pikachu tries to stay asleep but someone keeps shaking him. Pikachu gets annoyed at this so he thunder shocks that person.
Misty:AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! owww. *cough*
Misty: Night Night.
Misty falls over, but Tracy caught her and helps her back to her feet.
Misty: But mommy I don't want to go to school today.
Tracy: Huh?
Misty: PIKACHU YOU MOTHER FUCKER WHY THE HELL DID YOU SHOCK ME FOR!!!!!
Pikachu: Chu chu pik a PI KA CHU! ( Well I did it because.. I WAS TRYING TO SLEEP YOU BITCH)
Misty: Well since your..... WHAT DID YOU CALL ME!!!!!!!
Pikachu: Chu ka chu ( I mean yes ma'am)
Misty: THAT WHAT I THOUGHT. Now could you give Ash the pika-alarm
Pikachu: CHHUUUUUUUU!!!!
Pikachu hits Ash with a thunder bolt and unfortunately hit everyone else in the room. Ash falls out of bed to the floor. Tracy and Misty just stand there smoking.
Director: NO SMOKING ON THE SET!!!!!!!
Pikachu:(Laughing) Cu Chuuu pika pika
Ash: Pikachu you fuckin prick. Why The Hell did you shock me!
Pikachu: Chu pika pi (Its fun shocking the fuck out of you)
Misty: You little Piece of yellow shit your fuckin dead. (Misty pulls out two swords and a wok, Pikachu freaks and start running.)
Director: Start the standard Misty chase scene.
Pikachu: CCHHUUUUU(SSSSHHHHIIIIITTTTT) (Run like hell)
Ash And Tracy both sit on the beds in the room and Misty is running though out the house trying to make Diced Pika. They listen to the destruction though out the house but then Ash turns his attention to Tracy.
Ash: Is it me or does it sound like she's in a good mood?
Tracy: Yeah it sounds like it, that's good.
Tracy: Hey Ash what time is it?
Ash: Uhh its 9:50.
Tracy: Shit, I'm late for helping Prof. Oak
With that Tracy flies out the door and Pikachu is now in the room and has just shut the door, but Tracy never makes it to Prof. Oak cuz he fell in one of Team Rocket traps. This time they add spikes to the pit trap and he died.
Director: He will die in every episode.(evil laughter)
BWHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
Everyone on set: AAAAAAHHHHHHH HIS GONE INSANE!!!!!!......... ohhh wait
that's normal never mind.
Pikachu: Pika pi p chu kaaa( Ash hide me or I'll be diced pika kabobs)
Ash scoops up Pikachu in his arm and puts him in his backpack and then Ash puts on his usual clothes, unlocks the door. Then as soon as he opens it kaboom Ash receives a face full of Misty Fist.
Ash: Owww!!!
Misty: Ash are you okay? I thought you were Pikachu.
Ash: Yeah I'm fine just tir....
With those words Ash falls to the floor and is out cold, Snoring.
Misty: Ash wake up I sorry I hit you, just wake up.
Misty having no luck at waking him decides to use her Pokemon to wake Ash up.
Misty: Staryu go, Water Gun attack.
The poke'ball opens up and a light from the ball becomes a Staryu. Staryu hits Ash with a water gun.
Ash:(Gurgling) Help me, stop I'm up I'm up!
Misty then calls back her Staryu to its poke'ball.
Misty: Staryu return.
Ash: Well I think I'm going to go out for a walk. Beside you have a mess to clean up before my mom gets home.
Misty: WHAT MESS...??!!
So Ash walks down the stairs to the front door. He walks outside a takes a deep breathe of fresh air. He starts walking on the road out of Pallet town and as he does a strange light surrounds him. Were he once was surrounded by trees and grass now surrounded by walls of metal.
Ash: AHHH! Were the fuck am I?!
Pikachu then hops out of Ash's Backpack to see what all the fuss was about and as he does he realizes that the floor under his feet is not dirt, but metal.
Chief O'Brain: What the hell! Who the fuck are you?
Ash: Huh? Pikachu Shock his ass!
Pikachu then shocks O'Brain out cold oh wait, never mind, he's dead. His body is chard black and sizzling.
Director: Anyone up for BBQ O'Brain.
Ash: Damn it Pikachu you killed the fucker I just told you to shock him out cold.
Pikachu: Well too fuckin bad you ass, I'm the one who does the shockin' around here and don't forget that. I'll do what the fuck I want.
(Ash stunned silent)
Pikachu: Woo I can fucking talk, this is fucking cool. Now I can tell you you're a fuckin dumb ass Ash and the only fuckin reason I haven't left you yet is cuz you saved my life. When I finally save yours I.... Wait I saved your life about a hundred times. Screw this, as soon as we get out of here, I'm leaving.
Picard's voice: MR. O'Brain to the bridge please.
Picard's voice: O' Brain please respond.
Picard: Computer find O'Brain.
Computer: O'Brain is in the transporter room. Dead.
Picard: What the hell! Worf get some cannon fa... I mean security down
there and find out what happened.
Worf: Yes Sir.
Picard: Worf this time try to take them alive.
Scene: Transporter room
Pikachu: How the fuck do we get back to Pallet. Hey look there's a panel over there.
Pikachu hops up on the panel and starts pressing buttons. Pikachu starts transporting things from god who knows were. There was a bunch of Klingons, Faranges, Valcans, and Humans. Then Pikachu just gives up and shocks the panel, it overloads and blows up.
Ash: I hate to be the person who has to pay for that.
Pikachu: Shut up and help me find a fuckin way off this thing.
Ash: Don't look at me I not a fucking computer...
Ash was then cut off by a beeping sound, but there was no one around.
Computer:...^beep*
Ash: What the hell was that beeping sound??
Computer: I'm the computer of this ship. I help people with problems that they can't figure out by their self.
Director: Boy Ash needs one of these every day. Hahaha.
Ash: Great then you can help my Pikachu and me. How the fuck do we get back to pallet town?
Computer: Well you would've use that panel that blown up over there and
then set the timer. Then step on the transport pad over there and it will send you back, but since the panel was blown up you can't do what I just told you. (I think I just wasted my time)
Director: You sure did.
Ash: God damn you Pikachu you had to blow up the fuckin panel didn't you. You couldn't leave it alone.
Pikachu: Shut your mouth at least I was searching for a way off here you were just standing there acting like a retarded bitch.
Ash: Go To Hell you stupid yellow piece of shit. Next time I'll let Misty kill you, how would you like that. I didn't have to save you, you know.
Pikachu: .....Uhh, oh, yeah, her, okay so you saved me, but that's not saving us from this is it?
Ash: (thinking and steam is coming out of his ears)Computer...... can...... you..... do..... the..... job .....of.... the .....panel..... that .....was ......destroyed?
Director: That's got to hurt.
Computer: Yes
Ash: Ohh yeah before I forget, how come I can understand Pikachu.
Computer: I am translating what he says.
Ash: Well stop!
Computer: Okay.
Pikachu: Ash you.. chu ka chu... aaachhuuu ( Ash you fuckin ass... Aaahhh fuck I'm talking Pokemon again)
Ash grabs Pikachu and steps on the transporter pad and the tell the
computer to send them back to Pallet. The computer says it will take five minutes to do it. Then Worf and his "security" team come in phaser in hand ready to take the intruders, "alive".
Worf: Don't move or we will open fire and kill you. O hell move, I want to kill you I like killing things.
Earl: Hey, that's my job.
Pikachu does his most powerful Thunder attack ever, killing the security team. Pikachu missed Worf cuz he was hiding behind the "security" team for protection.
Worf: Crap, I know when to kill things and when to run, this is the time to...
Before Worf finished he turned and ran like hell out the door screaming in fear.
Director: I knew he was always a coward.
Then the five minutes were up and they were transported back to pallet. As they leave the Enterprise explodes.
Ash: I hope we never have to go though anything like that again.
Pikachu: Pikachu pika (what do you mean we)
Pikachu hops out of Ash's arms and grabs a suitcase puts on a trench coat and rips up a piece of paper and leave.
Director: Hey where the hell do you think your going?!
Pikachu: I QUIT!!!
Director: You can't...QUIT!!!
Pikachu then shocked the Director killing him. Then the Director gets up pulls out a Sniper rifle and shoots Pikachu in the back of the head. Then Pikachu comes out of his Trailer asking what all the racket is then see's his stunt double on the ground, dead.
Pikachu: What The FUCK!!!! That's the second stunt double this week.
Ash: Can we get back to the show?
Everyone on the set pulls out a gun and shoots Ash.
Everyone: SHUT UP!!!
Ash then comes out of his trailer.
Ash: WHAT THE FUCK! I'M DEAD!
Director: Okay everyone on the set and lets continue.
Okay, Ash then goes back to his house to see Misty asleep on his couch. Ash goes over to the couch and kisses Misty on the lips. Misty wakes up and sees Ash and Pikachu.
Misty: I got you now you yellow piece of shit.
Misty pulls out her two swords and cuts Pikachu like an onion. Ash pulls out the wok.
Misty: He stole my wok... DDDDIIIIIIEEEE!!!!!
Ash: Lets eat.
Misty: Yum with a side order of Ash stew with it.
Ash: AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!
Voice: Hey That's my job to kill Ash.
Misty and Ash looked around to see a guy wearing all black with a M-16 in one hand and a Chill cheese dog in the other.
Ash and Misty: AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
Mysterious man: Do you guys have any ketchup??
Ash and Misty: No
Mysterious man: ohh... okay.
Mysterious man: DIEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!
While the Mysteries Man is shooting them with his M-16 he's eating his
Chile Cheese dog. Then he lets go of the M-16, it continues to fire and
stay in the air. The Mysteries Man grabs a bottle of ketchup from his coat and put some on his Chile cheese dog.
M.M.: Mmmmm Chile cheese dog.
Demo comes in holding a case.
Demo: Dude you forgot your retainer again.
Then on its own the M-16 turns around and shoots the retainer case.
Demo: Hey man watch were the fuck your shooting DUDE!!!
Then M.M. finishes his Chile cheese dog. He reaches in his trench coat and pulls out another one.
Demo: Hook a friend up man.(thought: where the fuck did that come from)
Demo then slaps the fuck out of himself and walks off.
M.M.: Hey you forgot your hot dog!
M.M. Then throws it towards Demo. Demo spins with lightning quick speed
catching the hot dog pulling out a glock and shoots Ash's bloody corpse. Then after a good laugh and 15 minutes later of shooting Ash and Misty, Demo and M.M. say good-bye.
M.M.: .......Whatever.
Demo: See ya on the flip side.
Demo the pulls out his glock and shoots himself.
M.M.: Well that's a depressing ending for Demo.
M.M. Shoots his body with the M-16 and has a 20 cannon fodder salute.
Okay now the new star of the show is Brock, because of the death of the
original star.
M.M.: Opps I forgot to kill some people.
M.M.: Goes over and picks up the glock that Demo had, and takes his M-16 and goes shoots Gary.
Okay now that he's dead we can finally end episode one. Well that was, I think a good first episode well lets recap. These are the people who are dead: Misty, Ash, Pikachu, Demo, Gary, And Tracy. It doesn't look like we'll have that many people in the next episode well I hope you like this story.
The En... Ohh Hi Earl..... hahahaha something wrong?
Earl pulls out a glock and points it at the Director... All goes black.
Director:AAAAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!
The En...
Brock: Yeah I'm the star.
Zombie Ash: Brains!
Brock: AAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!
Eats Brock's brains.
Janitor: I wish they wouldn't make such a mess.
The Janitor Holds up a "The End" sign.