A Fated Reality-Chapter 20
#25 of A Fated Reality
Last dares, almost time for the tourney!
This is the last dare chappy, folks!
I'm sorry that these were so funny, but...
THE TOURNEY MUST COMMENCE!
In any case, these last sets will make you lose your sides.
They probably may meet with The Constitutionalist's sides... Who knows? :/
Anyway, the tournament will restart next chappy!
Hope you guys can wait for it til then!
For the poll... The top 3 choices were...
1. It's awesomesauce!-3 votes
2. A good read!-2 votes
3. Funny.-1 vote
I thank those that participated! Tell me who did it! I'll send you a cookie! With milk!
And this was meant for Solopuppy's birthday, but I couldn't do it in time! Happy-belated, young puppy!
Enjoy!
Roll The Film!
The Camp Of Self-Perpetuating Pilfering...
'And now, we've hit the Deadly Round!' The announcer, with his bitch-ass, had just woke me up form a nap since we were on break.
"Huh?...'Deadly Round'?" I rubbed my eyes to rid of my drowsiness.
'The Deadly Round...All dares from here on out...Must be YouTube'd AND be worth more than 5 years in prison." The loudest gasp in the room belonged to Adam as he paled at the prospect of publicity.
"Well fine! BRING IT BITCH!" Since this was our show, that didn't get censored.
'Oh, it's been brung...Because we're STARTING WITH YOU!"
GODDAMMIT!
"Fine!" I stomped over to the wheel, already pumped and ready to end this damn game. It never looked so good to see before I spun it, giving it a looksee before standing by, looking at my fingernails. When the wheel stopped, I vigilant-style checked the picture it landed on...
And saw someone walking in reverse.
'A heavily enforced law in Connecticut, walk backwards in any city.'
"BRING IT ON!..."
Later...
"I sing the walk song~! Sing the walk song~! I sing it good~! And no one can stop me~!
I sing the walk song~! Sing the walk song~! I sing it good~! And no one can tell me~...
OTHERWISE~!" I was skipping backwards in a park, getting appalled stares the whole while. I came across a crosswalk, where police cars were lined up in front of a store where it was currently under assault by a crazed gunman. I waited for the light to turn red before beginning my trek across the street. As soon as I made it half-way...
"HEY! THAT KID'S BREAKING THE LAW! THAT'S NOT ALLOWED AT THIS TIME!" A lady was positively outraged at the sight of me freely walking backwards to the other side of a street. Her bitch-ass screeches caught the attention of the nearby law enforcements. The second they saw me, they completely ignored the crazy guy holding a pistol and pointed their guns at me.
"HALT! STOP YOUR INSANITY AND WALK THE RIGHT WAY!"
I paused mid-step, seeing them and the crazy guy look at me the same way.
"Come on man! I'm fucking psycho, and even I wouldn't do that!" A record scratched somewhere.
"Are you kidding me!? You have a PSYCHO robbing people at gunpoint YET you stop all things and try and stop me!? FUCK THAT, SON!" I was pissed; why get all serious over a change in motion? I continued to walk backwards.
"HEY! I'LL GIVE YOU TO THE COUNT OF 'STOP!' TO STOP!"
"That's not even a damn number!"
"It is in my head!" I came across a park with people in it.
"Hey! That kid's walking backwards!...Why aren't the police doing anything about it?"
"Because they's pussies." The crowd that gathered began to think on it...
A Little Later...
"Oh come on! Now the CROWD'S doing it!?" The Connecticut Police department were about to ask their Department Sheriff for a raise in ALL of their salaries as they watched me and the HUGE crowd of people walking backwards in the streets.
"What's our motto, people!?
'YOU CAN'T STOP ME CAUSE YOU'RE A PUSSY~!'
"Louder!"
'YOU CAN'T STOP ME~! CAUSE YOU'RE A PUS-SSY~!'
"TAHT'S HOW YOU DO IT PEOPLE!" I edged out the crowd, letting them walk it out.
"Hah. I can cause political uproars." I left soon after I said that...
Back At The Camp That Chris McClean Can't Buy Back Because All Of His Money Was Here...
'Okay, how many views?' Chris checked his phone for the video that was posted mid-march.
Dem views said...13,004,997 and still going up.
"HAHA! Top that suckas!"
'Next up is Jack and Cynthia!' Jack-In-A-Killer-Box and Cynthi-Lyndi-Christi went up to the wheel together like a couple. The wheel laughed at the face of danger.
'HAHAHA!'
The duo looked at each other...
"Do it?", Jack asked.
"Do it.", Cynthia answered. The wheel leered at them.
"What are you mortals planning? I do not have the time for petty whisper-!" The wheel was promptly shut up as Jack spun the wheel. It spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun-
I'll shut up.
It stopped after a few rounds of Patty-Cake. The picture was of someone's lawn blood-red.
'In any city or town in Kentucky, paint someone's lawn grass red.'
"Sounds like fun.", Cynthi-Shironi-Macaroni said...
Later...
'Who the hell did this to my lawn!?'
'Your lawn!? Mine looks like it was the scene of a genocide!'
You see? There was these guys. They called themselves the Crimson Lancemanagers. Had came together through a treasure amp they found as kids. Next-door neighbors. Both of them were guys. Single. Looking to mingle. And knew how to PARTY!
Nearby, Jack-Jack and Cindy Vortex were in an alleyway, laughing their asses off, formerly known as LMAO'ing.
"That was priceless.", Cynthia said, wiping a tear outta her eye.
"You said it...See about the others?"
"Definitely." They didn't just do the 'Crimson Lancemanagers'...
They did a whole neighborhood BLOCK!
22 houses were checked for reasons behind their new 'paint jobs.'...
Ten families lost their houses that day...
Back At Camp...
'So how many views for that?' The initial video didn't get immediate views like mine, but since it was more spread-range...
22 separate videos=A LOT OF VIEWS
"The views...", Siphon went, checking his cellular device, "are 13,010,103 and counting."
"And that's a record Seje.", Jack said, smirking at me...
Before I showed him my vid that had ascended to 14 million while they were gone. He shut up.
'Next up...ADAM RAMZI!' He blushed again from the loud announcement. He power-walked to the wheel and spun it, quicker than the last time. It spun, laughing like Jigsaw from the 'Saw' series. When it stopped, Adam slowly looked up...
I slowly looked up...
Chris looked up slowly...
The twins looked up slowly...
Life-Siphon slowly looked up...
Samurai-Jack slowly looked up...
Hazel-Darling looked up slowly...
And Shocker looked up at the picture...
It showed an ice cream cone...
'Go to Texas and have an ice cream cone in your back pocket...What?' We were all staring at him.
"Really nigga?..."
Later...
"Excuse me little boy?" A little girl of 13 had went up to Adam as he walked around, looking for the police.
Why? I think he was trying to get arrested without showing his Pardon Pass so he could get bailed out...By me.
Jesus CHRIST!
"Yeah?"
"Are you gonna share that?" Her sweet voice was a little too sweet; the sugar levels went up from that point onward.
"Uh...I can't..."
"Aww! Why not? Just a lick..." She stepped closer, making Adam very uncomfortable.
"Uh...I can't share it...Please go away."
"But I just wanna lick it~..." Her tone was betraying her intentions as she looked hungrily at Adam. He paled as she started to loosen her top, letting one of the shoulder straps come off.
DEAR GOD, WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO OUR CHILDREN!? DAMN YOU MILEY CYRUS!
"Uh no..."
"Please~?"
"No."
"Pretty please~?"
"No." His voice was raising in octaves as she persisted.
"Pretty please with whipped cream-?"
"NO YOU FUCKING BITCH!" The record that always knows what to do scratched as she looked at him in shock. Then, she mysteriously smirked.
"Knew I'd get you to crack..." She took in a deep breath, inhaling very dramatically before...
"DAAAAAAADDDDDDDDYYYYYYYYY! MEANIE!" Soon as she got done making her Siren Call public, cop cars came around the corner speeding like they were in the middle of a chase. They all screeched to a halt in front of Adam and the little girl. One of the cop cars opened their driver seat and the thickest moustache ever seen was seen on a man in his chubby middle-ages. Donuts were seen in the car he came out of when he approached them.
"What is the meaning of this!? What'd he do Charlotte!?" Her crocodile tears had the man glaring deadly daggers with poisoned tips and lasers.
"He...wouldn't let me...have some of his...ice cream cone daddy..." She sobbed so dramatically she woulda made her drama teacher proud.
"Where is it!?" She pointed at Adam's back pocket, where the ice cream cone was located...
All of the police officers sprung into action.
"SUSPECT HAS AN ICE CREAM CONE! I REPEAT, AN ICE CREAM CONE!" Adam was so confused, he didn't register what was happening until he was already in the girl's dad's car.
"WAIT!" he was shocked that they didn't even bother frisking him as they sped off to the police station...
Some Time After...
I kicked open the door to the Louisville Police Station, Viridis right behind me.
"Where's the boy?" The officers looked at me like I was crazy. Laughter began to ensue, making my eye twitch.
"Viridis? Initiate Operation: Fuck Up The Po-po And Get Adam Back, or FUTPAGAB for short." The Gecko of Greeniness sprung into action...
Hitting them all in the kids.
"AhhhAHHHHHHHHH!" Was the mostly heard word in the vicinity as they all dropped to the ground. We went to the girl's dad and took his cell door keys and went to the holding cells.
Inside, we had crooks, thugs, 'gangstas', serial rapists, serial killers, cereal killers, and juvenile delinquents in cells all over. We had to go through the cereal killers before we made it to the juveniles. Jeers and rude comments sounded as we went.
'Look at the green lizard...'
'Lucky Charm's not safe anymore~!'
'That little boy is about to meet his maker...'
I just flicked them all off until we came across the juveniles, seeing kids that looked like they were tough but their eyes betrayed their true emotions. Adam was in the last cell with a weirdo saying "No more meat dad" to his teddy ear in the corner. Adam was staring at the wall with a blank look on his face. The opportunity that arose was not to be missed.
"Hey Adam?", I said, knocking on the door before opening it. He didn't look right away, still being a little disoriented.
"Yeah?..." He looked lost, like being in the Lost-And-Found yet not being found yet except by that one kid who thought you were cool enough to take but wasn't allowed to so you were resigned to being stared at creepily.
"Say cheese!" The flash that ensued made Adam slowly looked at me...
Phone in hand...
Back At Camp...
'Okay, we gotta move people so...WE'RE GONNA GO WITH THE DEADLIEST WE HAVE!' The announcer was through playing games.
'For this dare, EVERYONE HAS TO BE IN IT!' But I cut him off.
"Aren't we supposed to keep track of who got the most YouTube views so far?"
'What's the point of even competing? Adam beat the three of you COMBINED with his views. I'm pretty sure 42,867,045 views over someone getting surrounded by police for having an ice cream cone in his pocket is worthy of a trophy!'
Adam was not amused.
'QUE THE DEATH OF THE WHEEL!' Raph instantly charged a Flamethrower and launched it to the wheel.
Who screamed like a girl.
'NOOOOOOOOO! I DIDN'T GET THAT BLEACHER'S NUMBER YET!'
Pfft, you weren't gonna get it anyway. She was taken already.
He BURNED, turning into ash quickly before being swept away by the lonely janitor who spends his free time in his office...
0_0...
'And now for the dare you ALL have to participate in...BREAK INTO THE WHITE HOUSE AND ASK THIS QUESTION TO PRESIDENT OBAMA!' I raised my hand as he left it at that.
"What's the question?"
'Here.' He tossed me the card that had the dare on it. As soon as I read it, I tore it up.
"What's wrong with it?", Hazel-Lovely asked.
"IT'S SO STUUUUPPPIIIIIIDDDDDDD-!..."
Later...At The White House With No Free Soda Machines...
"Alright here's the plan. Chris, Hazel-Darling, you go through South Wing. Siphon and Shocker, you go through East Wing. Jack-And-The-Beanstalk and Cynthi-Monatoshi, go through West Wing. Me, Adam, Steven, Clara and Lisa will go pilfer the Kitchens. Any questions?" Clara raised hers.
"What are we supposed to ask?"
"Trust me; I'll tell you when the time Is right now come on!" I put my hand in the middle of all of us, waiting for the eventual joining-in. They all shook their heads before putting their hands in the huddle.
"Alright, fam for life on 3?"
"Fine.", they all answered.
"1...2...3...FAM FOR LIFE!"
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE!?" We all froze as we saw Barack Obama, clad in sleep wear, with his kids and Michelle. We all just stared at each other, not making any moves whatsoever. After five minutes, Obama got bored and pinched his bridge.
"Fine...What is your reasoning for being here?..." The others had all backed away, leaving me to explain. I whispered 'Traitors to them before turning to Obama and saying...
"Got any sugar?..."
The Next Day...
"The tournament!"
"The tournament!"
"The tournament!"
"...[Snores]..."
"Tournament!"
"I FORGOT ABOUT THE TOURNAMENT!"
"WAIT I KNEW I FORGOT ABOUT SOMETHING!"
"My MATCH!"
"Oh no! Move Eva, forgot about my match!"
"Eh. I'm a badass."
Cliffhanger's a right old bitch, isn't it?
This has been melancholy man guy.
So, that's the last dare chappy. Abrupt ending I know.
I got on YouTube! Adam got on YouTube! And Jack got on YouTube! LOVELY YOUTUBE!
What'll happen next chappy!?
You already know young huggabutts! :D
I have been bugged into a community for this fic. Go find it on my prof!
Debate on how awesome this is, Stalk, LOVE, and critique your asses off!
Moncheli!