A Fated Reality-Chapter 18
#23 of A Fated Reality
See what happens when you make funny stories.
You get Truth Or Dare to the MAX!
Welcome back to A Fated Reality!
[Automated applause]
Today, we break the law!
We break sound barriers!
And we break your laugh boxes!
Truth or Dare: All Dare-Version is copywrited and patented by Seje For Days.
My poll for 'How do you like AFR(A Fated Reality)' on FaanFiction stands as such:
1. It's awesomesauce!-3 votes
2. A good read!-2 votes
3. Funny-0 votes
4. Meh-0 votes
5. Coulda Did Better-0 votes
6. Probably should make changes to...everything-0 votes
7. Don't like this at all-0 votes
8. This fic is horrible and needs to be taken offa FanFiction-0 votes
Enjoy!
Roll the Film!
Nothing's Changed From Last Chappy So...It's Still Morning...
"Okay. I'm bored." We were in the lobby of the hotel, watching a game of Chess between Steven and Jack. Against popular belief, Steven was actually winning. Jack had yet to make a comeback.
"What do you propose we do then?" Steven had just made the move that would end the game, making Jack groan and throw his hands in the air. Azure held his shoulders as comfort.
"I have an old school idea. But, we'll need to visit the White House first."
"And why would we need to do that?" The others were getting suspicioso of my game, but their curiosity was still peaked.
"Because...we gonna need Pardon Passes..."
At The White House With No Arcade...
"Mr. President. I come to you today with a proposition." The Oval Office wasn't all that impressive in person than I thought it'd be.
"Oh? What can I do for you before I can security and have you all filed as enemies of the state?"
"Just several Pardon Passes."
"Pardon Passes? What're those for?" I began to smile.
"Me and my friends are gonna show the world how free America is and we'll need Pardon Passes to get most of our point across."
"And what are these Pardon Passes gonna prove?" At least 12 Pardon Passes materialized on his desk, signifying his approval of my plan.
"Just how much fun you can really have in America, President Obama..."
Camp Wawanakwa...
"And we're ba-!" But before the host of Total Drama Island could announce the return of an episode...
"PSYCH! Get off the set McClean!" The game show host was thrown off the island along with the remaining contestants.
"I WANT MY MONEYYYYYYYYY..." Heather, the bitch, was thrown away from us, going straight to the island where the other contestants were.
"That takes care of those assholes...Now, let's head to their little theater. I'm pretty sure they got some stuff we can use for this little idea of mine...
Later...
'And welcome to Truth Or Dare: All Dares Only!' The announcer, after another ass-whooping, called out to national TV's everywhere.
'We have the most...DARING...UNEXPLAINABLE...SHOCKING SHOW for you, ladies and gentleman! We will have these cast members go all-out in their quest of portraying America's freedom! Welcoming...'
'Sajuan Jackson!' Applause from a remote sounded.
'Christopher Cousineau!'...
'Opal Collins!'...
'Jackson Slerthy!'...
'Clara and Lisa Brooks!'...
'Steven Hill!'...
'Adam Ramzi!' Adam became a tomato when the applause sounded for him.
'Siphon Rayzar!'...
'Jack Prex!' Applause for all over the world sounded at the mention of his name.
Damn Jack, youse famous.
'And lastly, Pokémon's own Cynthia Shirona!' The last person called got nearly the most applause.
'And now...LET THE GAMES BEGIN!'...
Truth Or Dare, Suckas!...
"Okay, spin the wheel and se what dare you get...Adam, you're up first!" The 16-year-old got up nervously, watching us and the cameras before he went to the wheel. All of the pictures on it loomed at him, as if being the resigners of his fate. He reached up hesitantly, grabbed a metal appendage before using all of his puny might to push the wheel to spinning motion. It spun and spun, but it last only 5 seconds, no type of fun. A picture of a stick figure running from a sea creature was what he landed on.
"Um...What dare is this?..." The announcer went through his set of envelopes before coming across the one with the same picture.
'OH!...You got the 'Runner's Luck' dare, Adam! You have to run across a body of Gyarados-infested waters for 15 seconds without getting caught or stopping!'
Adam shuddered, thinking all about the possible ways this could go wrong.
'Accept, pass, pass on, or quit?' Adam thought about it; did he want to quit now to stay safe or...?
"I'll accept."...
Later...
"THIS WAS A BAD IDEA!" Adam was running for his life while making sure to keep a grip on the harness for the speed boat ahead of him. A school of Gyarados swam quickly behind him, mouths gaping and clamping shut as they tries to catch him.
"PUT YOUR BACK INTO IT BOY!" He wouldn't let the boat start unless I was there as support.
But I was more like his coach at this point.
'5!...4!...3!...2!...1!...TIME!' The announcer reeled in the harness, taking Adam with it before we were teleported back to the theater.
'Next up!...Christopher!' Chris in all his nerdy glory, walked up to the wheel confidently. He looked it up and down before grabbing an appendage and spinning, a lot faster than Adam. It spun, spun, spun...Lot of fun. After a few moments, it came to rest on a picture of a barrel surrounded by fish with X's for eyes.
'OH! You got a LAW-BREAKER!'
"Law-Breaker?"
"Oh! I know! This is one of many dares involving the law being broken! Unless I'm mistaken..."
'YOU ARE TO GO TO THE CLEVELAND AQUARIUM AND DUMP ALL OF...THIS LIQUOR INTO THE FISH TANKS!' A BIG-ASS barrel of beer was lowered to Chris. He gasped at the size, being 4' taller than him.
"How am I supposed to get this IN the aquarium!?"
"Put your back into it!" Chris glared at me, but I shrugged at him. Hey, wasn't my fault I love being an inspirational speaker to some...
Later...
"SIR! STOP WHAT YOU'RE DOING! THINK OF THE CHILDREN!" The security guard was yelling for Chris to stop as he opened the barrel of highly intoxicating liquids into the Endangered Species tank filled with fish with colors that ain't on the rainbow.
"YOU KNOW THAT'S ILLEGAL IN OHIO!" The fish swam up to the liquid being poured, tasting it before pausing mid-swim. The security guard could almost taste his pink slip as he watched the fish 'die'...
Nope, they got back to moving.
And it was there why it was illegal to get fish intoxicated as they began to party...
HARD.
One of them got on a DJ system that somehow worked underwater and played some muffled 'Wiggle'. The fish began to swim and dance, since thy didn't have legs they couldn't twerk to it. Chris and the security guard had 'WTF!?' faces as they watched them party rock into the HOUSE TONIGHT!...
Back At The Pilfered Camp...
"Welcome back Chris!" Steven called enthusiastically before seeing his emotionless expression.
'NOW...WE HAVE OPAL COLLINS!' Hazel-Bless Her Soul And Then Some skipped to the wheel, giving it a look-sie before pushing it down to spin it. It spun around in a 1080 before stopping on a very lewd picture~...
'Opal, you are to go to Texas and flaunt...these dildos at law enforcement officials!' Six dildos were put in front of Hazel-Deliciously Good, her smiling at them.
"I see you guys found Raph's stash."
"Yeah...It wasn't that hard to find." I was blushing because...
Flashback...
"Raph! Why are you dragging me!?" Raph, the foreva-perv, had kidnapped me before we could leave the hotel, dragging me to the forest nearby. There had been some wild Pokemon, but they didn't fuck with us as we trekked towards the mountain. I saw a cave from in-between his legs. But he saw me look through them.
'Heh. Enjoying the view~?'
"Oh haha. You only made it so I HAVE to look through them, you perv."
'Yeah yeah. Remind me later to have a talk with your children...'
"Why?"
'You'll see...'
I muttered jerk as we came into the cave, him throwing me inside.
"OWW! That fucking hurt!"
'At least see what you landed on.' I scoffed at him and turned around...
And saw the world's BIGGEST dildo collection.
I had my mouth gaping at the various sizes, widths, species, lengths and so much more. I was so intent on them I didn't hear Raph come up behind me. I flinched when I felt him sensually rub his claws on my face cheek-meat.
'Have I ever told you how much of a meal you look to other Pokemon? How much you tease your kids with your body? How much you make them want you? Think of you~? Lust for you~? Pretty soon, their mental barriers are gonna break, and you'll get caught...'
"Yeah, keep talking." Raph 'Hmph'd' at my words and picked me up to get me face-to-muzzle with him.
'They will come for you...Just hope you can hold them off long enough for the...Shift to end.'
"Uh-huh... But wh-?" He cut me off by pulling me into a kiss, grabbing my head and left booty-butt-cheek. My muffled yells of "BITCH, I HAVE A MATE" were disregarded as he deepened the kiss, sending his tongue in my mouth. He began to pull me in closer, growling into my mouth as he went feral.
'My...Compliments...To...The...Chef...' He spoke in-between kisses, eyes becoming more and more like slits. I was becoming worried as I was running outta lovely O2. After a few more moments of whether or not I was gone die by kissing, Raph released me. He panted for breath and looked at me like a creep-creep.
'Now that...was a kiss...I will expect more of those unless you want your kids to know about your fetishes~...' I paled at his threat.
"Fine..."
Flashback End...
Present...
"...so there." The others looked at me like I was a suspect to murder as the dare got started...
Later...
"LASS! You cannot do that! It's against state law to have more than the amount of dildos you have in yer possession!"
"But I feel so FREE!" She had been stalked by numerous Texas law officials, constantly being reminded of the law while flashing her Pardon Pass to them.
"I can do whatever I want! And whatever I please, because my name is Hazel-Lovely!" She pranced all around Houston, showing off her dildos proudly...
All 6 of them...
Back To The Camp...
'Now we have...Sajuan!' I ran up to the wheel, not wanting to waste time sitting down while Raph sent VERY perverted motions at me. I spun the wheel, watching it go once, twice, thrice and then some until it stopped on an image of someone kissing in front of...
Were those Japanese yaoi fan-girls?
'Looks like you gotta go to Japan and kiss a guy of your choice in front of yaoi fan-girls.' I smirked as I readied to give him my answer.
"Simple. I want to do it with Mi-!"
'ME!' A record scratched as I snapped my head at Raph, who had his arm raised while he stared at me with a cocky grin.
SONUVA! MUTHA-!
'Okay!' My jaw dropped as the announcer announced that we had to do it. I looked at Mister, who looked at me with the same expression: confusion.
Why did Raph wanna do this?...
Japan...
"Hello!"
"AHHHHH!"
"My name is Sajuan and this is Raph!"
"AHHHHHH!"
"We're gonna show you guys a kiss!" I was praying that Raph would take this kiss as good acting.
Especially Mister for that matter.
"AHHHHHHHHH!"
I looked at Raph, who smirked at me. I scoffed and beckoned to him.
"Alright remember, 15 seconds. That's it."
'Fine fine.' Raph pulled me close to him, chest to chest before he lowered his muzzle to me. I raised my head to him, lips puckered. We closed the gap. The girls squealed, writing on notepads for info on us.
14...
13...
12...
11...
10...
9...
8...
7...
6...
5...
4...
3...
2...
1...
Time...Time!...TIME!
"I was trying to pull back, but Raph was keeping it going. I felt prodding on my mind of mysteries and I heard Mister's voice...
What was in it made me wanna cry...
'Sajuan...why are you two still kissing?...' I could practically feel the tears coming out.
'Mister, no need to worry. I'll find a way outta this kiss. I know there's a way out.'
'[Sniffle] If you're so sure, why can't you do it now?'
'HE WON'T LET ME GO!' Raph's grip was vice, like he was...
Trying to show someone something...OH HELL NO! YOU ARE NOT GONNA RUIN OUR RELATIONSHIP NOW!
I bit on his tongue, getting a grip on it before I began to pull, taking it with me.
'What're you doing Sajuan!?'
'Trying to get him to let go of me!' My pulling seemed to have no effect, but I was able to get my feet off the ground and planted them on Raph's underbelly.
'Push...push it real good...' The pushing was working as Raph stopped moving his tongue. He looked at me with slits for eyes-just like back in the cave.
'Where do you think you're going, lover-boy~?' His voice was so creepy, I don't wanna hear it ever again...
If only I knew...
He deemed my pushing a nuisance and let go, letting me fall. The girls were crying the same word over and over again, but I could tell they were calling me a tsundere.
"Look, time's up! We gotta go!" But before they could retaliate with mallets, I got outta there with Raph...
Back At The Camp...
'Next up is Steven!' Steven walked casually to the wheel, spinning it without hesitation. It landed on someone yelling while there was a crucifix in the middle of the picture.
'Scream curse words in a house of God.'...
Later...
Steven walked into a church called 'Associate Reformed Presbyterian Church'. The mosaics and windows were eye-catching as he walked through to the altar where the choir was practicing. The Reverend, Reverend Mitchell, was conducting the choir when one of his directions led him to see Steven coming to him.
"Ah, hello young man. What can I do for you?" Steven sweated nervously before replying.
"Um yeah...Could you tell me if...there...a bathroom here?" the Reverend laughed at the boy's anxiety. There should be no reason to be this way if you're in a house of God, right?
"Good because...FUCK CHRISTIANITY!" Everyone stopped, looking at Steven like he pronounced himself as the Anti-Christ. Then...
"YOU MOTHERFUCKER! HOW DARE YOU INSULT OUR BELIEFS WITH YOUR POTTY MOUTH!?" The nuns charged at him, nunchuks in hand.
Hah...
Back At The Camp...
Steven had came back, nursing a few bruises.
Damn, nuns can kick ass if they wanted to.
'Next up is...Jack Prex!' Applause sounded as he walked up to the wheel. He spun it with a flick of the wrist. It spun fast before ending abruptively on a picture with an eye on a table. There was a price tag nearby.
'Sell a jar of eyes in Texas.' The others looked disgusted, but Jack smirked.
"Eh. I own those rednecks an ass-kicking anyway..."
Later...
"First a girl with dildos, now this!? Sir, you cannot do that here!" More Texas police officers were on the scene, trying to get Jack to stop selling the eyes he had while at the same time wondering where he got a Pardon Pass to do so.
Also, Jack was making $500 per eye he sold and his jar was half-way empty.
"Please sir, can you stop selling these here eyeballs? You're making Texas look bad!
"So? I'm making money!"
"But think of the children you're scarring!" But when idiot #2 said that, a bunch of kids with thousands of dollars came by and bought the rest of the eyes from Jack, bringing his total funds to be...
$165,500.00. Damn.
"Hey um...No hard feelins, but uh...did you know there's a...eye-selling 'round these parts?"
"Yeah, no. Bye..."
Back At The Camp...
Jack came back as soon as Siphon got up.
The Rayzar went up to the wheel before stating 'Pass On' just in case he got a really embarrassing dare. He spun the wheel, watching it carefully to see if he made a good call. When he saw a picture of a burglar with a cup going into the White House, he thought about his hasty decision.
'You received a deadly dare: Break into the White House and Kidnap the First Lady for a tea party with her presence. Since you passed this on, it'll go to the most recent dare-takers.'
That meant me and Jack as we got up, giving a kiss to the heads of both of our Fated before leaving...
Later...
"Alright, stay quiet and stay low." Breaking in was easy. Finding the First Lady while not getting caught was very, VERY hard. We looked up and down, all around the White House, even sneaking into the Oval Office where the President was vetoing a bill that was to prevent bacon from being used in sandwiches.
Good call Obama.
We were in the kitchen when we thought about it.
"Did we check her room?"
Nope.
We dropped our cups of water, who squealed as they landed on the floor 'BITCHES!', and ran up to the room next to the Oval Office, where a door marked:
First Lady Michelle Obama's Room
Do Not Enter!
on it. Me and Jack looked at the sign before throwing it in the garbage. We knocked.
"Hello? I'm busy. Come back later." At least she was in there. Me and Jack looked at each other before busting into the room.
"WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS!?" The 1st Lady looked shocked and angry that we busted her room wide open.
Well, we got dares to do, and we're not gonna quit NOW!
Jack dashed to her like a boss, silencing her screeches as I grabbed her legs. We were teleported outta there as soon as she was snug in our grasp...
Back At The Camp...
"Would you like some more tea Hazel-Darling?"
"Yes please and thank Sajuan." We were having a classy tea party back in the theater. It was pish-posh and British.
"Would you like some more tea Steven Universe?"
"Thank you and never fucking call me that again."
"Will do. More tea Jack?"
"Sure."
"Hey! British talk ONLY!"
"Fine. Yes please and thank you."
"Thank you. More tea Michelle?"
"GET ME OUTTA THESE TOPES SO I CAN CLAW YOUR EYES OUT!"
"No. You will have one more spot of tea or I will dump it down your over-used throat." She shut up after that, knowing she does talk too much. I gestured to the pot once more. getting shakes of the head. I gestured again. She shook again.
Gesture. Shake. Gesture. Shake. This was the pattern for the day. Learn it and write it down.
"You know what? Fuck it; what do I have to lose?" Michelle gave in and let me pour her a cuppa. As soon as she did, her bonds released her.
"ARE YOU SHITTING ME!? I COULDA DID THAT TO SAVE SOME TIME!"
"Yeah yeah. Go to sleep." I had Mister use Hypnosis on her, making her head hit the table.
"...Best TEA PARTY EVER!..."
Cliffhanger's a right old bitch, isn't it?
This has been melancholy man guy.
DARE GALORE!
We broke laws! We broke laugh boxes! We broke into the White House! And we had a tea party!
What'll happen next chappy!?
I dunno.
Make this a president, Stalk this, LOVE it, and critique your asses off!
There will be more dares next chappy!
Moncheli!