The Mind is a Cruel Place

Story by Niniju on SoFurry

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(Friz's Point of View)

   I gasped as I woke

up. It was nighttime, and I was the only one awake. My heart was racing, and I

wasn't much calmed by Ghast's cute display of hugging me tightly and sucking

his thumb. The things he said in my nightmares sounded too real. I also noticed

that I'd wet myself in my sleep. I sighed and attempted to pry the husky off of

me so I could change, but I found out he was a light sleeper.

   "What's wrong,

Friz?" he asked, rubbing his eyes. I didn't really want to speak with him. Part

of me was ashamed of that thing I've not even done to him. "Did you have a

nightmare?"

   I threw my caution

to the wind and stuck with the evidence that I actually had. We had bonded

tremendously in less than forty eight hours. I was going to take my chanced.

"Yeah, I did." I said, rubbing the back of my head. "Promise you won't be mad

at me, Ghast?"

   "Why would I ever

be mad at you? You've helped me so much." Ghast inquired.

   "I had a dream that

you were mad at me. You were accusing me of horrible things while a chorus of

regrets sang in the background." I rubbed my head as the headache returned.

Ghast didn't speak, but climbed into my arms and hugged me. This shocked me,

but not in the action itself as in the way he did it. He just sat in my lap and

hugged me wordlessly, and it was starting to unnerve me until I realized he was

trying to calm me down. "Sorry, Ghast. I didn't mean to worry you."

   "You can trust that

if I have any problem with you, I'll say it." Ghast said.

   "Thanks, Ghast.

Now, shall we change out of these wet diapers?" I said with a chuckle.

   Ghast chuckled and

hugged me a little longer before sitting up and agreeing. I went into the

bedroom to find Regir sleeping on the bed nearest the bathroom with Timler next

to him. On the middle bed was Feir, Gary, and Nick, and the bed closest to the

window had the Fallenoak twins in it. Fluhr and Julio weren't sleeping, but

were gazing out the window at the stars. They seemed to be having a

conversation.

   "What do you think

it would be like to be normal?" Julio asked. "I bet it would be nice. No powers

to have you be hunted. No responsibilities to the betterment of anthro-kind.

Why were we even chosen?"

   "God has a reason

for everything, Julio." Fluhr answered. "I'd just trust in his plan for you,

and surely your reward will be worth the toil." I'll be honest. My religion had

been put on the backburner since all this had started happening. I made a

mental note to pray before going back to bed. Maybe I'll ask Ghast if he wants

to join. I made sure to make an amount of noise as I approached the Stormy Pair

so they wouldn't be startled when I spoke.

   "Psst, Julio." I

whispered. He was already facing me as I said this.

   "Yes?" he asked in

a low talking voice. I asked him if he knew where Regir was keeping the

diapers, and Julio pointed to the backpack next to the bathroom door. There was

a note on the top of the black backpack from Gary.

   This note is for Timler and Friz. The

diapers that'll fit you are under the sink in there. I figured it'd be better

than having Regir regress you every time you needed a change. -Gary

   Ghastillo was right

behind me as I finished reading the letter, and I grabbed a husky-sized diaper

from the backpack before heading into the bathroom and he followed. It was

quickly decided that Ghast couldn't put a diaper on himself, so I took the

liberty of helping him out, for which he was grateful. I changed into the new

diaper and noticed that Gary thought it funny to get a semi-childish design on

the diapers he got for Timler and me. Joke's on him, I kind of like the childish

designs. After we changed, I washed my paws before Ghast and I sneaked back to

the couch to get some more sleep before morning, and I remembered to offer a

prayer before we slept. Ghastillo was happy to join in. By some turn of events,

Ghast and I had fallen asleep holding hands. I think it was something to do

with Ghast being scared of not seeing me, so he wanted to hold on to part of

me. I also welcomed the intimate gesture to further solidify our new

relationship as unofficial siblings.

   We both fell asleep

at relatively the same time, and my dream immediately started again. The only

difference was that Ghastillo's voice wasn't part of the chorus. I was able to

look around and saw light pouring in from a window behind me. The window was

small, but it was also part of a door. The door opened, and Ghast stepped

through. He shouted my name and ran to me, creating a knife out of the shadows

and cutting the ropes confining me. Now freed, I ran from the room as fast as

my paws would allow. Safely out of the room, I stopped and immediately embraced

Ghast, repeating my gratitude over and over again.

   "Is this the

nightmare you mentioned?" Ghast asked when I let go. I said that it was. "You

know...I was there when you...you know...did that thing..." He refused to meet my gaze.

I was so confused. What thing?

   "What are you

talking about?" I asked. He gazed into my eyes at this point until I realized

what he meant. "Wait, no. No, no, no. You don't understand, that wasn't my

fault!"

   "I'm not saying it

was." Ghast tried to tell me, but I wasn't listening. I had dropped to a

sitting position and was hugging my knees and rocking back and forth. My tail

had wrapped around my legs.

   "Something

possessed me, and I couldn't help myself! It felt too good to stop. Every heart

that ceased its beating gave me some kind of drug dose." I muttered not

entirely to Ghast. "I've never felt anything like it, and it was horrible. I

didn't even think to pray for forgiveness. Not even when we prayed a few

minutes ago-"

   "Friz!" Ghast

yelled, grabbing me by the shoulders. "I'm not mad at you. How many times do I

have to say it? I love you no matter what you do because we're brothers!" He

said. There was no hesitation in what he said. And I believed him. We were

brothers. And our real brothers were probably brothers in heaven. I couldn't

wait to meet Nillo. A shame it would have to wait a lifetime. In the meantime,

I forced myself to forget the past and keep moving forward. I think the saying

was: You'll never be forgiven until you forgive yourself, but I'd rather just

forget myself and think about who I will be.

   Problem was,

unbeknownst to me, Timler and Regir weren't exactly peacefully sleeping either.

(Timler's Point of

View)

   Let's see, floating

platforms in an abyss of slime. A nightmare, wonderful... I looked around to see

what I've come to expect of my subconscious. I was surrounded by knowledge of

the universe. Thousands upon thousands of books stacked into oddly shaped

bookshelves that radiated into the sky. I knew to not step towards the slime

for fear of confronting the only monster in this dream. I know not what it is,

but it seems to love constriction.

   My attire had

altered as well. Over my diaper was a frayed cloak of sorts, and I looked every

bit like a mage in his library of spells. I immediately pulled my hood over my

head. The other figures in this place may not be monsters, but they can sure

hurt you if they can see your face. I then heard a whisper just as I was about

to begin searching for the secret tome that my brain had convinced me resided

here. The whisper belonged to a certain bear I had come to love as a brother.

   "Timler!" Regir

hissed. He wasn't wearing his hood, so I knew it was him.

   "What are you

doing? Put the hood on!" I hissed. He obliged before asking me where we were. "We're

in my nightmare. Quite frankly, I would've preferred it stay mine."

   "There must be a

reason we're here together." Regir reasoned. "How often do you have this

nightmare?"

   "More often than I'd

really like." I responded. Regir seemed to be fascinated with all the books

around him. He reached to pull one off of its shelf, but I slapped his hand

away. "Don't do that, you'll regret it."

   "What?" Regir

asked, showing honest fear at this point.

   "Just believe when

I say that touching any of the books except the one I'm looking for is very,

very bad." I explained. "Follow me and keep your head down." I began walking

through the floating hallways, being sure to avoid the fountains of slime that

simmered in the center of every intersection. I must admit, if my brain created

this place, it was thorough. The ceilings had the most elaborate chandeliers I've

ever seen, and every book had a different title. There were fonts located at

various intervals, and that was the only place you could actually safely

interact with the environment.

   "What is this

thing?" Regir asked as we approached one. I explained that it kept one sane

when wandering these halls and told him to notice how the other figures aren't

anywhere near these things. I showed him how to drink from it and told him to

be careful.

   "If you drink them

too often, your body in real life will suffer. If you forget to drink after a

while, you'll be lost here forever." I explained.

   "And when do we

wake up?" Regir asked.

   "We'll wake up when

my brain deems it fitting." I answered. The tone of my voice made it obvious

that I've been stuck here for lengthy times before. I sighed. "Come on."

   We walked down

various corridors and hallways, watching the realm itself bend at the slightest

whim. About an hour passed before I stopped to drink again. I felt my head

beginning to spin, so I found the nearest font and had me and Regir drink. "It's

a shame we can't somehow speed this up. I'm beginning to feel uneasy."

   "Oh, trust me. It

gets worse. Problem is, my powers don't work here, so I try to be careful

wandering these halls." I explained. We were passing through a four way

intersection, and I was pretty set on going straight until I saw a gate out of

the corner of my right eye. I turned and saw the entrance to a strange garden.

Past the garden was a rather opulent looking palace, and my mind said that the

answers I sought were there. I noticed that there were no fonts in the garden,

so I didn't bet on there being fonts inside the mansion. I stopped at the

nearest font and instructed Regir to drink. I told him that it'll be a while

before we can again.

   Regir responded with

a sarcastic, "And to think, I was beginning to like the taste of spinach in my

mouth." I giggled a bit at that. The font water did taste as disgusting as

watered down vegetable soup, but I ignored the taste.

   "Alright, you

ready?" I asked. Regir nodded and I shoved the gate open, strutting straight

down the garden with purpose. We reached the mansion with no incident, and the

foyer offered the book I'd been looking for all this time. I reached the book

and stroked its text as if under a trance. The text soared off the page and

covered Regir's body and my body equally, spilling knowledge into our ears and

mouth and leaving no place unexplored. I felt knowledge surge into my memory,

and it hurt. I thought it would never end until everything ceased and I bolted

awake...