The most cliche story ever written

Story by snackattack on SoFurry

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This is the MOST cliche story ever written...EVARRR!!! Enjoy.


*The Most Cliche Love Story Ever* by snackattack I was walking down the aisle of the grocery/bookstore/library/school hall/office carrying things when I crashed into someone who was also carrying things, sending all of our things flying. "Oh no! I'm so sorry!" we both said helping each other gather our things up. and then we looked up into each other's eyes and froze. In front of me was the most beautiful specimen of a lion I had ever seen. I was instantly in love, but no! I thought throwing an arm over my eyes and holding my paw out to stave off whatever there was to be staved...off. I mustn't, can't follow my heart now, first I must agonize over my undisclosed unfulfilled unrealized love for this other fur. "Oh how clumsy of me," I said suddenly standing up and I held my paw out. "My name's Rick. You wanna get coffee some time?" "I'd love to," Replied the other fur. "Oh, and I'm Andy, by the way." At the Coffee Shot we sat and drank coffee. "This is good coffee, and I'm not Lion," he said, lamely. I chuckled anyway. "Yes it is. Have you ever heard of fisting?" "No, tell me more." He said, his ears perked up as he leaned in. "Well it's when you take a coffee in each hand and drink from both cups." "That's double fisting you goof and you do that with beer!" He said, playfully smacking my forehead. "Oh yeah, that's right, hahahaha!" "Hahahaha!" We both laughed at my mistake. Then we finished our coffee and he said, "Wow that was great coffee I think I'm in love. I mean with the coffee." He added, suddenly looking sheepish. "Oh yeah I'm in love too...uh ...with the coffee." "Yeah... coffee...." he said looking longingly into my eyes and this might have been the perfect time to kiss but no! I say, throwing my arm over my eyes and holding the world at bay with my paw. I must instead question his feelings for me and be self-conscious and noncommittal a little longer. And so after we left the coffee shop he invited me up to his apartment for some more 'coffee' and I knew what that meant....coffee! So off we went and when we got to the apartment he seated me in the living room and went to the kitchen to make some coffee. He returned naked with two hot cups of coffee and I thought, 'wow! hot bod!' and this was the perfect time to make my move but no! I say, once again throwing my arm over my eyes and the other paw held out flat in a gesture of denial of love and scalding hot coffee spillage. And he sat next to me and put down the coffees and leaned into me with a bigggg kiss and my world exploded! "I love you!" He said breathlessly. Except for the breath that he used to say the words. "I love you too!" I replied full of breath. And we made sweet sweet love and fell asleep in each other's arms. Which was hard to do after drinking all that coffee, believe me.

*The Even Moster Cliche Love Story Ever Written* So there I was, sitting alone in the coffee shop with no one to share my coffee with. "Oh dear," I sighed, "I am so alone. And with no one to share my coffee with. Vat to do, vat to do?" Just then, the most stunning specimen of a wolf walked by! "Great Googly Moogly!" I said looking at his ass "I would like to take a bite out of THAT apple! ...OH my god he's walking this way!" I tried to play it nonchalant looking over to his left while at the same time freaking out and licking my paw and fixing my hair. "Hey baby you looking at me? I don't see anyone else here so you must be looking at me!" He said, leaning on the table. "Uh huh! I sure am!" I said nodding. "You like what you see?" he asked cocking his head. "I sure do!" I said nodding so enthusiastically my tongue lolled out and saliva sprayed everywhere. "You wanna see more?" he asked, cocking his head the other way and exaggerating the question with an upraised voice. "Boy would I! Where can I sign up?!" "Right here!!!!" he said pulling out a sheet of paper. "For $29.99 a month you can see as many hot guys as you want walking past you in the cafe!!!!" "You're joking!" "Yes I am! Hahah, April fools!" "But it's Januar-" "Shhhhhhh," he said pressing his finger against my lips. "My little muffin. There's time enough for talk later. For now...just KISS ME!!!!" He closed his eyes and brought his muzzle in for a big kiss! When our lips touched I felt fireworks go off inside my head, my socks popped off, steam came out of my ears, my face went red as a light and then he broke off the kiss and said "Let's go steady" "Okay!" I smiled, and we lived happily ever after. THE END.