To have chapter 1

Story by White66 on SoFurry

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#1 of To Have

The second version of my first chapter of my hopefully ongoing story. Nothing major, just a few tweaks but hopefully it makes a better read than the first version. I wanted to get to the main points of the story more quickly and make it move along more quickly too. And I hope I did that. I'd love to know what you guys think, even if you didnt read the first version. That version isnt going away, just going to be moved to my scraps.

Hope you guys enjoy it,

White


Her quarters look strange to Mellisa, much larger than she is used to. Odd how packing away a few small trinkets can make a room look so different. It's like all traces of her life, her time here have been swept away. Well, not all of them. Mellisa's gaze strays to the necklace that Ivy had given her, the tiny silver coin on a chain hanging on the edge of the dresser. She should have gotten rid of it. Should have just thrown it away like she had been. She had even come close to doing just that a times, but when it finally came to it she just couldn't do it. The memories were too strong. And still bound to her, leaving her unable to move beyond them.

She had always known she would be leaving here someday. Yet why does it feel like leaving home? An odd mirroring of the feeling she had when she came here to start this tour. She had expected to start to feel comfortable here but not to develop this much attachment to a place she had only spent a year of her life and would never see again.

She should just push this away. Tomorrow is a new start for her, the first real step in her life going the way she wants it to, has planned it to. Maybe not the way she had originally thought of it, but what she wants to do.

Not that she minds having her life planned out. In a way it has been for as long as she can remember. How many people can say they have a true calling, a duty even. It was a duty she had accepted from the moment she had been old enough to understand it. A duty she had learned from her mother. But that wasn't the only thing. Her mother is a skilled warrior and soldier and Mellisa had learned from her since she could hold a sword. Like the rest of her people, her mother served in the military, even before Cascade had become Stillwater and everything had changed. And it made sense for her to join the military too. More than just sense, it was something she wanted to do. Even if she is starting down a different path than her mother, is starting to consider living her life how she wants it.

'So..you just about packed?'

Mellisa looked towards the voice, her eyes compressed into a frown. 'Yeah. Wait, is it 1300 hours already? You're shipping out?' Mellisa says, covering her surprise as best she can. Where had the time gone; those last few hours having slipped by without her noticing.

'Yeah.' Jacqui settles onto the bed that had been hers, placing her bag down in the small gap between her bunk and Mellisa's. Even that small act bringing memories with it, memories from the first time they had met. She had sat on the bed just like that, an awkward silence hovering between them, not unlike the silence they share now. 'Attaché to the Southern Command and training centre, assigned to oversee the training of local indigenous forces.' Sounds more fancy than it is. Two months of training some local militia units, helping them to re-organize and restructure.'

'Sounds right up your alley to me. You always were a compulsive organizer. And good with people. I bet you'll have them whipped into shape in a hour.' Mellisa laughs.

'Might take a bit longer than that.' Jacqui says. 'Still, should give us a lot to talk about when I get back. And you can show me around your new digs.'

'If I get any, you mean. I could just as well still be crashing in the Barracks when you get back. You know I can't afford a place on my own. And I'm not sure I want to be on my own.'

'Who says you have to be?' Jacqui says. 'I know you got burned by Ivy but that's no reason to put your life on hold. Maybe you should move in with someone, find a small apartment with someone to share the rent. Anyway, I gotta run. But think on it, okay?'

'Okay.' Mellisa stands a second after Jacqui, hesitating before stepping to take the vixen in a hug. It is the one sign of emotion she feels she can show; emotion she is pretty sure she can keep from her voice. 'First drink is on me when you get back.' It's silly maybe but those words are kind of a promise that they will meet again, despite what life could throw at them. Maybe she can't do anything to control fate, but she likes to think she has some power over it.

________________________________________

Mellisa walked into the barracks and it instantly felt like coming home. Adjusting her pack on her shoulders, she strode through the double glass doors. The barracks had been her home since she had started her basic training. Mellisa had taken quarters here a good two years ago, joining with the other hopeful recruits hoping to earn a place in Stillwater. Attrition was high, the training hard. Many candidates proved lacking. But she had never doubted that she would succeed. If only she had that certainty now.

She pulled her ID tag from inside her jacket almost on instinct and presented it to the security guard. He ran his glove scanner over it with a practiced air, then waved her through with a respectful nod. Probably one more of politeness than actual recognition. The Barracks gets a lot of through traffic, captains or commanders on inspections for their superiors, aides fetching or carrying orders and officers awaiting transfers like herself. Not surprising, with the facility being the hub of Stillwater.

The foyer might have been crowded, but she caught a break with the lift. One had just arrived at the ground floor, so she slipped inside as the flood of furs cleared. Tapping the button for the 50th floor, she braced herself for the soft lurch as the lift started to rise. Odd, she could do a combat drop in an airship without so much as a flutter. And yet this made her stomach squirm. She took a few deep breaths to calm herself. Then again, it's not likely to be the lift setting her off, more her destination.

The ride to her mother's office was one of the longest she had ever taken. And not just because she was climbing nearly to the top. They hadn't parted on the best terms and honestly she doesn't know how she will react. Will she have moved past it? Or will she still be disapproving? It had been her choice, one she wanted to make. But she would still have liked her approval.

Her mind keeps going round in circles, running over all the things she could say. Her mother has never been one to hold her tongue when she disapproves of something. She is just on the verge of thinking this might be a mistake. The lift announces her arrival with an annoyingly cheerful chime. The doors open a second later with barely a shudder and she is looking at a short, narrow corridor lined with offices on either side. This is her last chance, she could turn back. She had been considering it. But that would just be running away. And her mother didn't raise a quitter. Taking one last deep breath, she strides towards the one she seeks, her heart pounding with each step. All too soon, the dark oak door is looming over her. She sighs, raising her paw to rap on the door with a soft knock, an equally soft reply letting her know she could enter. 'Captain Lockwell, reporting ma'am.'

That feels odd, just a little. Or might seem so to some. To greet ones mother with a announcement of rank rather than familiarly greeting. But that is the way it has always been. Maybe she and her mother don't have a usual family relationship, she has been the centre of her world for a as long as she can remember. And she has always looked up to her. And long sought her approval. Receiving it, on the other hand, is a very different thing. Her mother is a stickler for perfection and few can win her absolute approval. Mellisa is certainly no exception. Almost the opposite in fact. She is held to an even higher standard than others who serve her mother. And why shouldn't she? She has been trained by her since she could hold a sword. And her expectations are so much higher.

Her mother doesn't answer immediately but her eyes speak volumes. She just fixes her with a steely stare, her face as unreadable as a slab of stone. And her voice is just as hard. 'I had agreed to let you spend a year on this tour because it was something you wanted to do. But I expect it not to interfere with your duties here. Is that understood, captain?'

Mellisa bristles, hearing the emphasis she put on the word 'spent.' One that makes it sound like 'waste'. Waste? Was it so wrong to really take that tour, to want to test herself in real combat? Any training, no matter how realistic, can't prepare you for the real thing. And she had wanted to see the real thing, to test her skills outside of the safe and sometimes constrictive environment of her home. To go where nothing was expected of her, where her ability had not already been measured. Somewhere she could be herself. Here, she was a figure of note. Her entire life has been lived in the spotlight, her future mapped out, her life not her own. She had wanted freedom, just for a bit, freedom that comes from not having everyone watching her all the time.

'It won't, ma'am. I can assure you, my focus is here now. I am ready to accept whatever duties you have prepared for me.' Mellisa replies evenly. And with more surety than she really felt. But how could she tell her how she really felt. Her mother has never taken well to weakness. And she would most certainly see her doubts as a weakness. What other way is there to take them? She has been trained to deal with anything, her mother having raised her to be a fighter. And yet, here she is; staring her own doubts in the face like a twisted reflection of herself.

'Good. Because it is time you started accepting the responsibilities of your position and your rank. Your peers have already worked with and accepted commands of squads of their own. As you should have done, as was your duty. But you have done neither. And it is time you were remedied of that. Which is why you will take command of Patrol Squad Terra today, effective immediately. They will be yours to command as you see fit. And train as you see fit.' Her mother steeples her fingers, leaning back to watch her coolly. 'Their triumphs will be yours. As will their failures. Do I make myself clear?'

Mellisa was nearly rocked back on her heels, her stomach leaping into her throat. The unfairness and unexpectedness of it hitting her like a punch in the gut. To be thrown in like this is not what she had expected. She fights down the churning in her stomach. Where does she start? Does she get help? She doesn't even know anything about her new squad..how they have served or for how long, and with who? Will she be stepping into a group that has trained and served together for years? One who will see her as an outsider? Or a completely disparate group that will be as fractious with each other as her? She has no idea which would be worse.

Despite the churning in her mind and stomach, Mellisa puts a brave face on that as best she can. 'I can handle that, ma'am.'

'See that you do. Dismissed.'