XIV. Surprise
As told by Nina
I had slept in late on the morning of Milo's birthday. Margaret and I had left shortly after the end of the theatre event, but we spent some time talking together in our dorm. We had praised each other's artwork for Planes of Existence, but I felt like something else was on Margaret's mind.
My suspicions were right, she was indeed bothered. Not by the artwork, but by the reason she was able to create it. While painting, she had poured all her negative emotions onto the canvas. The Ridgeback emphasized she felt better after painting the artwork, but she was still worried about her half-sister.
Margaret had still not been able to get in touch with Sonia. The arctic fox had not answered her cell phone for months, and Margaret even tried to call her parents. After all the time and effort she spent, there was still not a single word from the 'delinquent in distress', so to speak.
It was not like Sonia to stay quiet for so long, and Margaret expected something bad must have happened to her. She even paid close attention to the local papers and other news, hoping she would not have to read an obituary there.
I did what I could to cheer her up and to reassure her the arctic fox would probably be alright. Sonia had to have a good reason to refrain from contacting her half-sister, right? The Ridgeback greatly appreciated my efforts, and once again told me how much she valued me as her friend.
When I went to bed, I had mixed feelings. On one hand, I felt sorry and compassionate for Margaret, and I might even share some of her worry. However, I was mostly excited about Milo's birthday. How would he react to the party his grandmother and I had planned for him?
Trisha had asked me to drop in at four in the afternoon, so we could do some last minute preparations. It would also give me some time to regress on my own accord, so I would be comfortable and at rest once Milo would come in.
Milo would be invited over for dinner, while his grandmother would mention nothing about me, or the party we prepared. We just hoped he would take the surprise in a positive way, and that he would be in the mood for it in the first place.
So there I sat, in the guest bedroom, on the edge of the bed. Dressed in a diaper, loose-fitting shorts, and my favorite puppy-appropriate t-shirt - a bright pink one with an adorable print of Zita Oysin on it.
Zita is a young red deer hind, living in a magical land with many kinds of animals, including mythical creatures like pegasi and unicorns. Together with her dog, she meets at least one new creature in each episode, explaining to children what they are in the meantime.
In doing so, the watchers learn what a certain animal looks like, what sounds they make and what animals are big or small. Zita also teaches children about how they should treat animals, especially if said animals are pets. Milo does not particularly like the show, but then again, it is mostly aimed at girls.
This also means it has a suitable amount of pink to go with it, and we all know little Milo thinks pink is only for girls. He does like the t-shirt on me, though. The picture was completed with my pacifier in my mouth and Natasha held tightly in my arms. Was I nervous, you ask? Does Milo's fur have stripes?
Every now and then, I would glance to my left, to the still folded Poochies diaper I had put there for Milo. Next to the diaper was a can of puppy powder I had bought to prevent rashes. I'd had a minor case of rash after a particularly long playtime, and none of that had been anywhere near 'pleasant'.
I was really glad to have my pacifier to suckle on, as it helped to calm my nerves somewhat. Nevertheless, it did not help enough and I was hoping Milo would arrive soon, before my nerves would drive me crazy.
How would he take it? Was he going to pounce and snuggle me for letting him play puppy on his birthday, or would he be shy because of his grandmother watching us? Would the onesie even fit him? Then, finally, I was saved by the bell -literally. The sound of the doorbell rang through the apartment, and a few seconds later, Trisha popped her head around the door of the guest bedroom.
"Just stay here, Nina. I'll send him in," she whispered, as if Milo could hear her through the front door.
I nodded, too nervous to speak. She left the door ajar, so I could listen in on her conversation with Milo. The sound of the front door being opened. Milo greeting his grandmother, then putting his bag down. I knew the sounds, but the suspense was killing me.
"Before we go have fun together, I'd like you to put your stuff in the guest bedroom," Trisha said, which I took as my cue. Milo could walk into the room any moment. When he finally came in, he casually put his bag down near the door, completely oblivious of my presence - or the presence of my bag at the foot of the bed.
He then turned to the bed and his eyes undoubtedly met mine. Something clicked in his head, and he immediately - and somewhat clumsily - closed the door, anxiously leaning against it with his back to prevent anyone from entering.
"Hiya Milo!" I said, after I had taken my pacifier out.
"W-what are you... what _is_this?" he said incoherently.
"What do I look like?" I asked, more or less rhetorically.
He relaxed somewhat, but kept leaning against the door.
"You look like a puppy... But why? Y-you... should go take that off! Granny is going to find out about us!"
"No she isn't," I stated matter-of-factly.
"B-but, how is... what? I don't get it. This isn't the time for games!"
"Sure it is!" I said playfully. "It's your birthday, silly. You should have fun on your birthday, right?"
"Nina, Granny doesn't know I play puppy."
I grinned. Milo's expression changed.
"What does... wait, you're not going to tell her, are you?"
"That won't be necessary," I said with a smile. "Relax, Milo. She knows."
"What?" he exclaimed, moving away from the door and approaching me. "Granny knows? How did she find out?" he asked, frantically looking to his left and right.
I shrugged.
"She didn't. I told her."
Suddenly, Milo froze and looked me dead in the eyes. It took him a few seconds before he could utter any words.
"Y-you... y-you told her?" he asked in disbelief. His tone then changed and I felt anger and anxiety slip into his voice. "You t-told her?"
I wanted to explain what I did and why, but something told me Milo was not listening anymore. He started to breathe heavily, at an increasing pace. I was hoping he would calm down, but before long, Milo fell to his knees with his eyes wide open.
It was scary to see him like that, reminding me of Roderick's performance, but a lot more penetrating. After all, Milo wasn't pretending - he really was upset. I knew I had to do something, but I had no idea as of what. In my confusion, I ran out of the room and went to the living room, expecting to find Trisha there.
I found her in the kitchen and told her what had happened, after which she motioned me to stay in the living room while she would go talk to Milo. Flopping down on the couch, I still tightly held onto Natasha, hoping my boyfriend would be okay.
As Trisha entered the guest bedroom, she let the door ajar again - probably on purpose. All I heard so far was Milo's breathing and whimpering. I began to regret not taking my pacifier with me. I was still nervous, but for a different reason - maybe I was even afraid.
Whatever she was doing worked. From what I could hear, Milo had calmed down.
"There, there. It's okay, dear." she reassured him. "I'm here for you, little one."
Apparently, this comment was startling, maybe even disturbing. A few sobs followed, and then Milo burst into tears, which soon changed into outright bawling. I wanted to go in and console him, but ultimately decided not to act on that urge.
After all, he was in this state because of me, so my presence would not be helpful. Besides, I knew I should trust Trisha on this. Having taken care of Milo for eight years, she knew him way better than I did. Well, save for that one secret he never told her about, of course.
It took some more reassuring words from his grandmother to calm Milo down. After a few minutes, he finally spoke up.
"Granny, I'm sorry..." he said in between two sobs.
"Sorry for what, dear?"
"I'm not... the grown-up dog you think I am. I-I wish I can be the one you could be proud of, and show you what you think I'm made of."
"Oh Milo, don't be sorry. I am proud of you, and think you're very mature indeed. You just have an unusual hobby. I don't think it's that big of a deal."
"But it is!" he countered. "It's weird, and it's strange, and... a-and," he started, but he did not manage to get the words across his lips.
"You want to say it's wrong, don't you?" Trisha asked.
No response, but knowing Milo, he probably nodded.
"I feel so... so strange, so... I don't even know how I should feel. All this time, I thought Nina was..."
"What, dear? You know you can trust me," the old Indian reassured.
"I thought she was, y'know, seeing someone else."
His words sounded like he felt hurt, but at the same time, they were cutting me as well. I had done my best to keep his birthday party a secret, but did not realize Milo could interpret my behavior and secrecy as suspicious.
I should have known better, concerning his insecurity, but on the other paw, it hurt me to hear he suspected me of cheating on him. How could I ever leave him? Even if I would ever break up with him, I would tell him up front, rather than sneaking behind his back. What good could it do to keep it hidden from him should I ever want to break up?
Just before I wanted to vocalize my anger and indignation, I realized how I had made Milo feel. Since he is insecure, he probably did not think rationally about this. Of course, it hurt to hear he thought I would see someone else, but from his perspective, it was not out of the box to jump to such a conclusion.
Trisha must have known I was listening in, because the next words she said were not loud enough for me to understand. She spoke a few sentences, then Milo replied he agreed with her. I wonder what she said to him, and why I was not supposed to hear it.
A little while later, she led him into the living room, holding his hand. His eyes showed clear signs of him having cried, and I felt sorry for him. I got up from the couch, putting Natasha down, then hurried to Milo to hug him tightly.
"I'm sorry for upsetting you by exposing your secret, Milo," I gently spoke in his ear. "I did it to help you, but didn't consider how it could hurt you."
"I-I think... I guess I can forgive you. Granny says she loves me, regardless of me being a puppy, but I was very afraid she'd think less of me. A-and I kinda should be sorry as well," he stammered.
"For what, pup? You didn't do anything wrong, did you?"
"Well, I thought you were seeing someone else. That's not very nice of me, is it? I mean, h-how could I distrust you like that? You're, like, the kindest dog I've ever met."
I smiled, even though he could not see my face. My tail probably told him enough anyway.
"I've been all sad and gloomy around you, while you were trying to cheer me up. I feel so stupid for thinking you were wanting to get away from me."
"Puppy, I know you don't like your birthday because of what it reminds you of, and I know it makes you sad, but especially in times like those, I want to be there for you."
"But I thought you didn't want me and-" he started, but I interrupted him by putting a finger on his muzzle. I did not want him to actually utter what he was going to say. Nothing good would come of that.
"Milo, if anyone should be sorry about you feeling like that, I think it's me. I was the one acting suspiciously in the first place," I said. "Besides, this is not all about you. I love you, little one. Not just because of our puppy friendship, but mostly because you make me feel safe and appreciated. Then again, you're awfully adorable, especially when you're a puppy. How could I ever leave my little angel?"
We let go of each other.
"Honestly, I wanted to tell you I was planning your birthday party, but I wouldn't be able to refrain from saying it'd be a _puppy_party."
"Y-you've planned a p-puppy party for me? Like how?"
"Most of that's a surprise, but Trisha and I have prepared some stuff I think 'little Milo' is going to enjoy."
His muzzle clearly showed he was in doubt.
"Of course, if you don't feel comfortable with that, I'll go change into my regular clothes and we'll spend your birthday like normal grown-up dogs. I prefer playing puppy with you, but I totally understand it if you don't want to be little tonight. I'd be disappointed, but I understand. After all, it's your birthday, so we'll go with what makes you happy."
Milo remained silent for a little while.