Red vs Blue episode 2
#2 of Red vs blue Season 1
Ep 2
RvB season 1 ep 2: Red gets a delivery.
"Hurry up lady's this ain't no ice cream social." The old hound said as the fox stared at him confused.
"Ice cream social?" The fox said still confused by the ancient saying.
" Stop the pillow-talk you two. Anyone want to guess, why I gathered you here, today?" The hound said while eyeing the two spartans.
"Um, is the war over and your sending us home?" Guessed the wolf as the hound cracked a smile.
" That's exactly it, private. War's over. We won. Turns out you're the big hero, and we're gonna hold a parade in your honor. I get to drive the float, and Simmons here, is in charge of confetti!" He yelled at the wolf.
"I'm no stranger to sarcasm sir." " God dammit private, shut your mouth or else I'll have Simmons slit your throat while you're asleep!" The hound yelled due to the sass in the wolf's tone.
"Oh I'd do it to!" The fox said causing the wolf to look at him crazy like.
" I know you would Simmons... good man. Couple of things today, ladies: Command has seen fit to increase our ranks here at Blood Gulch Outpost Number 1." The hound said causing the wolf and the fox to look at each other in shock. "Crap we are getting a rookie." The wolf said.
" That's right dead man. Our new recruit will be here within the week. But today, we received the first part of our shipment from Command. Lopez... bring up the vehicle." As soon as the hound said that a Chihuahua in brown armor drove up in a massive jeep burnishing a mounted machine gun on the back.
"Shotgun!" The fox said on sight.
"Shotgun!Fuck!" The wolf said noticing he was a second to late to call shotgun.
" May I introduce, our new light reconnaissance vehicle. It has four inch armor plating, maaag buffer suspension, a mounted machine gunner position, and total seating for three. Gentlemen, this is the M12-LRV! I like to call it the Warthog." The hound said as the wolf stared at him.
"Why 'Warthog' sir?" The wolf asked.
" Because M12-LRV is too hard to say in conversation, son." The hound said as the fox raised his hand to say something.
" No, but... why 'Warthog'? I mean, it doesn't really look like a pig..." The fox said as the hound began to stare at him.
"Say that again?" "I think it looks more like a puma." The fox said as the hound began to stare at him.
"What in sam hell is a puma?" The hound asked.
"Uhh you mean like the shoe company?" The wolf asked puzzled.
"No like a puma its a big cat like a lion." The fox said causing him to earn more weird stares.
"Your making that up." The hound said.
"I'm telling you its a real animal." The fox argued back.
"Simmons I want you to poison Grif's next meal." The hound said whit a dead serious tone.
"Yes sir." The wolf replied.
" Look, see these two tow hooks? They look like tusks. And what kind of animal has tusks?" The hound asked the fox.
"A walrus." The fox said.
"Didn't I just tell you to stop making up animals?" The hound asked while clearly starting to get annoyed by the fox.
Meanwhile the huskey and armadillo continued to spy on them from the cliff.
"What is that thing?" The armadillo asked referring to the 'Warthog'.
" I don't know, but it looks like uh... looks like they got some kinda car down there. We'd better get back to base and report it." The huskey replied.
"A car how come they get a car?!" The armadillo asked being clearly pissed by there new piece of equipment.
" What are you complaining about man? We're about to get a tank in the very next drop." "You can't pick up chicks in tanks." The armadillo replied glumly.
" Oh, you know what, you could bitch about anything, couldn't you. We're gonna get a tank, and you're worried about chicks. What chicks are we gonna pick up man!? Firay, and secondly, how are we gonna pick up chicks in a car that looks like that?" He asked clearly being in a bad mood.
"Well what kind of car is that?" The armadillo asked curiously.
" I don't know, I've never seen a car that looks like that before, it looks like a uh... like a big cat of some kind." The huskey said trying to think of a word to describe it.
"What like a puma?" The armadillo said.
"Yeah man there you go." The huskey said relieved to have found the right word.
Meanwhile back at the red base the discussion on what the 'Warthog' looked like was begging to come to a stop.
" So unless anybody else has any more mythical creatures to suggest as a name for the new vehicle, we're gonna stick with 'the Warthog'. How about it Grif?" The hound asked being extreamly annoyed.
"No sir no more suggestions." The fox said accepting defeat.
"Are you sure how 'bout Big Foot?" The hound said in a joking tone.
"That's okay." The fox said as he was begging to take things to far.
"Unicorn?" "No really im ... I'm cool." The fox said the conversation becoming extremely off topic.
"Sasquatch?" "Leprechaun?" Said the hound as the wolf began to join in.
"Hey he doesn't need help man!" The fox yelled to his friend.
"Phoenix?" "Huh... Christ?" The two continued teasing as the fox began to have enough and stormed into the base.
" Hey Simmons, what's the name of that Mexican lizard, eats all the goats?" " Uh, that would be the Chupacabra, sir!" The wolf replied slightly laughing at his insults.
" Hey Grif! Chupathingie, how 'bout that? I like it! Got a ring to it..."
To be continued...
A/N: Hey fellow furs this time I tried to space out the dialog as I was asked and this is my first attempt at doing so and also I am getting tired of calling the characters after animals and am going to begin to call them by there names starting next chapter.
Names of characters: Wolf - Simmons
Fox - Grif
Hound - Sarge
Huskey - Church
Armadillo - Tucker
That's it ohw and I do not own Red vs Blue it belongs to roster teeth peace out!