Underground League - Bunnie's First

Story by SagaDC on SoFurry

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#4 of Underground League

So here it is, the next installment of the Underground League series (as always, inspired by Poiupoiu and his now-defunct Underground League flash game). I was planning to finish one or two of the other UL stories first, but I ended up really liking this one so I pulled an all-nighter just to get it into a readable state. I'll probably still sneak in to edit a few things here and there, post-release, but this is more or less how it's going to stay. It's a bit on the long side, but whatevs, I guess I'm beyond apologizing for that. ;)

Anyway, first thing to keep in mind is that this is a flashback story. It takes place about five years before any of the other stories, and focuses on Bunnie Barrett (from "Double Teamed" and "A Public Service") during her awkward teenage years. It gave me a chance to explore a few of the odder themes in the Pokemon universe, as well as a chance to further develop one of my favorite characters. Every ballbuster gets her start somewhere, and this story explores how Bunnie got hers. I might end up doing similar stories in the future, with characters like Bonnie or Wings Akimbo, but that's all theoretical right now. I've already got plenty of half-finished stories in my "works in progress" bin, so I should probably complete those first. :P

As always, the obligatory warning - this story involves the following general themes: anthropomorphic pokemon, ballbusting, and general naughtiness. If one or more of those things turn you off, then you should probably move on to the next story. This story is actually a bit tamer than most of my stories (although not by much), but for folks who find domination or CBT objectionable, you've been warned.

Oh, and the first entire half of this story is pretty much character building and comedy. For people who want to skip right to the fun stuff (you jerks!), just do a search for "Let's get started" and it'll take you to the right place. You monsters.


Underground League

Bunnie's First

Evan raised his hand to knock, but hesitated before his knuckles had even touched the door. The eevee's fist hovered there, knuckles an inch from the painted wood, as he had second thoughts.

Or, uh... no, that wasn't entirely accurate. He had had second thoughts all the way back at the gym, when he'd been talking to Bonnie, and third thoughts in his car, and fourth thoughts in the parking lot. So he was up to... what, fifth thoughts now? Sixth? He mulled on that for a moment, then rounded it up to an even ten.

Still, there was no point in delaying the inevitable. He'd already come all this way, and at this point there wasn't any gracious way to bow out of his obligation. Besides, he hardly needed to give Bonnie MORE reasons to kick his ass. Weaseling his way out of this house call was a sure way to draw the lanky lopunny's ire.

He sighed, then steeled himself. His knuckles cracked lightly against the door once, twice, and then three times in a rapid staccato pattern, and he waited.

And waited.

And waited.

He furrowed his brow, absently glancing at his watch. He'd been waiting, what, a minute now? Maybe two? He knocked again, just to be on the safe side, but still no one answered. But this time he could actually hear someone moving around behind the closed and locked door.

Evan cleared his throat, raising his voice to speak through the wall. "Hello? Hey, uh, Bunnie? Your sister sent me to-"

The door opened- er, well, A door opened. Further down the hall, one rooms over, a door cracked open and a zubat with mussed fur leaned out. She smacked her lips, absently scratching at her gut as if just waking up. Not that it was easy to tell, since like most zubats she kept her eyes obscured - in this case by a black velvet sleeping mask.

"Yo," she grumbled. "Could you, like, keep it down out here? Some of us are trying to sleep or whatever."

Evan glanced at his watch again, an ear skewed. "It's two in the afternoon."

The zubat remained deadpan, her ears twitching slightly, and after a long moment it was obvious that she was effectively staring at him. Not physically, of course, but in spirit.

"And..." Evan continued awkwardly. "You're a 'bat."

"Uh," the zubat finally spoke, her tone heavy with sarcasm. "Doi?"

Evan coughed lightly. "Right, sorry. I didn't mean to-"

The zubat vanished back into her room, the door shutting behind her.

Evan rolled his eyes, then turned his attention back to the door. He cocked his head a bit, ears slanting forward as he noted the shadows at the foot of the door. It was painfully obvious that the loft's only occupant, almost certainly Bunnie, was right behind that door - probably listening to the exchange that had just taken place in the hall.

The eevee smiled faintly, then turned his gaze a bit lower. An ear perked, and he leaned down to drag his claw against a crack in the frame. He'd only been to the loft a few times in the past, and Bonnie had certainly never cared for him enough to let him know where she kept her spare key, but he knew a hidden panel when he saw one. He dug the tip of his claw in, then eased the narrow compartment open before plundering its contents.

He straightened himself back up, key in hand, and cleared his throat before murmuring against the door. "Alright, Bunnie. I'm coming in."

There was a muffled squeak in response, but he ignored it. He set the key into the lock, eliciting a distinct ratcheting click as the tumblers lined up. Another muffled squeak sounded out, and this time it was quickly followed by rapid footfalls heading deeper into the apartment- and then, abruptly, the crash of tumbling furniture and the heavy thump of a falling body.

Evan blinked, and quickly finished unlocking the door before letting himself in.

"Uh, Bunnie?" He stepped into the loft hesitantly. The lights were all off, and only a scant bit of light filtered through the firmly shut curtains. The eevee squinted, moving through the door frame as he scanned across the shadows. It didn't take him long to find what he was looking for.

He smiled faintly, moving to where the younger lopunny was lying flat on her back, right next to the toppled coffee table. Head cocked, he peered down at her. "Hey."

Bunnie pursed her lips, her whiskers twitching a bit as she peered back up at him. Her voice was small, but her ears were rapidly reddening with embarrassment beneath her creamy brown coat of fur. "Oh, um... hello. Evan, right?"

"Right," Evan smiled, leaning down to offer the fallen female a hand. "Why are you on the ground?"

Bunnie groaned, but gratefully accepted the extended hand as she pulled herself back onto her feet. Her voice was still small, and her gaze was quickly averted. "I was trying to hide."

Evan arched a brow, his canine-like ears twitching forward as he eyed the lagomorph inquisitively. He glanced past the lopunny, to where she had obviously intended to hide behind the couch - or perhaps the closet beyond it. Clearing his throat, he glanced back to the slightly taller femme'mon, carefully tempering his voice to something between polite and inquisitive. "Why?"

"Because-!" Bunnie looked past Evan, to the doorway and the hall beyond, as if half-expecting some bunny-eating beast to be waiting on the threshold. "Well, I-"

Evan bobbed his head patiently, still watching the flailing lopunny with the least judgmental look he could manage. "Mmhm?"

"Well-" she tried again, but then she uttered a defeated moan as she flopped back onto the couch. From the look on her face, she was still giving serious consideration to hiding behind it. "Forget it."

The eevee eyed her for a second longer, then turned to shut the door behind himself. He flicked the lock into place, then set the spare key onto a small shelf next to the door frame. "Your sister told me you were having some problems adjusting, but this is-"

Bunnie scowled, clearly unhappy with the prospect that her sister had been talking about her behind her back. She seemed to briefly forget her embarrassment, her long ears flicking bolt upright as she sat up. "Why are you in my house, Evan!?"

Evan blinked, a bit taken aback by her sudden change in demeanor. "Er, well, I was knocking and then I heard something crashing about. Since I knew where the spare key was, I came in to see if everything was alright?"

Bunnie slumped again, her ears drooping. "Oh, well... that's..."

She paused for a few long seconds, then exhaled heavily to both sigh and to blow her limp ears out of her face. "I guess that makes sense."

"Yeah," Evan smiled. "I thought so, too."

Bunnie cocked her jaw, her brow furrowed. She rose to her feet, quickly moving to usher the eevee back toward the door before he could find any new ways to embarrass her. "Okay, but, like, Bonnie's not here. So since everything is fine and super-great, could you just-?"

"I'm not here for Bonnie!" Evan quickly interrupted, doing his best to passively resist the sudden Bunniedozer before he could be swept back out into the hall. "I'm here for you!"

That gave the lopunny pause, although it certainly didn't stop her momentum. She had already backed the eevee all the way into the closed door before her brain seemed to catch up. "What."

Evan blinked, the slightly shorter eevee finding himself sandwiched between the locked door and a rather well-padded lagomorph. He tried to ignore the cleavage hovering just inches from his nose, instead forcing his gaze upward to the lopunny's face. "I mean, uh, I'm here because Bonnie asked me for a favor, but it INVOLVES you."

Both of Bunnie's ears shot skyward again, her eyes as wide as dinner plates as a thousand sordid theories obviously shot through her brain. Her expression was equal parts apprehensive and horrified, and it took her a moment to put her tumultuous thoughts into words. "What!?"

Evan cleared his throat again, shifting some as he tried to find a way around the lopunny that wouldn't be too awkward. His hands moved about, but stopped just short of pressing against her chest - or her hips, or her thighs, or- damn it. How could he push her back without looking like a complete pervert?

He finally settled for pressing lightly against the femme'mon's stomach, and she melted away at his touch, quickly retreating a half-dozen steps. "She, ah, said that you've been having anxiety issues. That you won't go outside, and you're afraid of... er... pretty much everything?"

"I am not!" Bunnie hissed defiantly, from safely behind the couch. Evan peered in her direction, and the lopunny quickly ducked back down and out of sight.

"Uh... huh." The eevee murmured, unconvinced. He looked away, though, instead moving along one wall where a dozen cardboard boxes were still stacked. Each one was meticulously labeled in marker, identifying them as the younger lopunny's belongings.

"Tch," Evan clucked his tongue, tapping one of the boxes. "You've been in town for, what, six weeks now?"

"Eight." Bunnie mumbled glumly in response.

Evan glanced back toward the couch, where the very tips of the femme'mon's ears were the only part of her still visible. "And you haven't unpacked yet?"

"I don't, uh-" The lopunny's ears twitched a bit, then vanished from sight as she turned about. Her pink little nose peeked over the top of the couch instead, followed shortly by her apprehensive eyes. "I've been busy."

Evan moved past the boxes, to the door that he knew led into Bunnie's room. He'd been by the apartment in the past, and knew well enough which room was hers. Especially since she had always made a point of locking herself into it whenever he had set foot in the loft. He nudged the door open and peeked inside, finding the room empty other than a rumpled bed and a heap of clothes.

He glanced back toward the couch, his voice wry. "Uh-huh?"

Bunnie swallowed, hard, peeking the rest of the way over the couch as she peeked morosely toward her room. "Erm... really, really busy?"

Evan pulled the door shut again, then moved over to sit on the couch. The lopunny retreated back behind the furniture at his approach, but he paid it no mind. "Bonnie says you haven't left the loft since you first moved in."

"Really busy..." came the half-hearted response.

Evan kept his tone even. "And that you hide every time she has someone over."

She said nothing this time, but the eevee could still hear her shuffling around uneasily behind the couch.

Evan settled back against the couch, comfortably, his voice sympathetic. "You grew up on a farm, right? Just you, your family, and a couple dozen farmhands?"

Bunnie answered this time, her tone miserable. "Uh-huh."

"Must be hard adjusting," Evan crooned sympathetically. "Saffron is a big city."

"Too big." Bunnie groaned.

The eevee bobbed his head slightly. "And you just evolved, what, six months ago?"

"Three months." Bunnie grumbled.

Evan smiled sympathetically. "That's rough. Evolution is awkward enough, without bringing massive life changes into the mix. Let me guess, your parents decided it was time for you to go find fame and fortune in the leagues? Forced you to move out?"

There was an awkward silence for a moment, and then Bunnie peeked back over the couch again. Evan was careful not to glance in her direction this time, lest she should retreat once more. "How'd you know?"

"Well," Evan rolled his tongue, a faint smirk on his muzzle. "Let's just say it's not terribly uncommon. At least they waited until you evolved, first. In some of the smaller towns, parents kick their kids out of the house when they're ten."

Bunnie leaned up a bit more, her arms folding across the top of the couch so she could rest her chin against them. "You?"

Evan's smirk broadened. "Sixteen. Course, I was glad to leave by that point."

The lopunny cocked her head ever so slightly, one long ear quirked inquisitively.

"Er, mom's a flareon and dad's a glaceon." Evan chuckled. "Lots of fighting."

"Aaah." Bunnie nodded.

Evan winced a bit, an ear skewed. "And when they weren't fighting? Hff... let's just say, lots of humidity damage around the house."

"Ah?" Bunnie's nose wrinkled a bit, confusion in her eyes. It was replaced a split second later by realization, and then amusement. She stifled a giggle, her eyes glistening. "Oh. Ew."

The eevee smirked again, this time glancing toward the lopunny. She peeked back at him uncertainly. "Yeah, ew. Apparently some fire and ice types have a real weakness for each other, biology be damned."

Bunnie grinned a bit, her eyes rolling at the lame joke. But she didn't say anything.

Evan looked back to the boxes that lined the far wall. "So, you haven't unpacked because you're hoping they'll change their mind? Maybe let you move back home?"

Bunnie's grin vanished, and her chin set back to her folded arms. "Mnf. Kind'a."

Evan quirked a brow, peering sidelong at the lagomorph. "Have you asked them?"

Bunnie shifted, her muzzle pressed against her forearm as she mumbled. "No."

"Don't want to disappoint them?" Evan asked, and the lopunny nodded mutely.

"Well," Evan continued. "To be fair, you haven't really given city life an honest shot yet. Have you looked into getting a job? Furthering your education?"

Bunnie hesitated, as if considering whether to lie or not, but finally she shrugged and simply shook her head.

The eevee glanced back toward the female, and she peered morosely back at him with her face half-buried against her arms. He paused, then gestured. "Here, why don't you move up here onto the couch so we can talk face to face?"

"Mmmnfmn." She mumbled, her muzzle wedged against her forearms.

Evan quirked an ear, his brow slightly furrowed. "What?"

"Don't wanna." Bunnie grumbled louder, her muzzle lifted just enough to keep her words from being muffled by her fur.

Evan held his quizzical expression. "Why not?"

"Cuz I'm dressed like a slob," Bunnie grumbled moreso, her eartips reddened ever so slightly.

Evan stifled a laugh, his ears slanting forward. "Well-"

"And I'm fat!" Bunnie huffed, her eartips reddening even more.

"Er," the eevee paused, then shook his head. "I wouldn't-"

"And ugly," Bunnie moaned, one furred hand slapped over her eyes. "And awkward and clumsy and all weird lookin' ever since I evolved!"

Evan remained silent this time, just in case the lopunny wasn't quite finished yet. When she didn't add anything else to her laments, he gestured toward the front door. "Do you want me to wait out in the hall while you get changed? You've got, er... a whole pile of clothes in the next room."

Bunnie sighed, her ears drooping. "They don't fit anymore, 'cuz I'm fat. I'm wearing the only thing I can fit into."

The eevee's ear twitched, realization dawning. "They don't-... wait, those are all clothes from before you evolved?" Bunnie nodded mutely, and Evan grinned. "Well of course they don't fit, then. Why don't you just go buy some new clothes?"

"Czmnnfmm." Bunnie mumbled indistinctly.

Evan arched a brow, eying the lopunny silently.

Bunnie scowled, her head lifting again so she talk more clearly. "Cuz I'm scared to go outside! I'm a fat, ugly rabbit in a big city full of horrible monsters that can eat me alive!"

"Well, I don't-"

Bunnie ignored him, building up momentum. "Every time I try to go outside, everyone stares at me! The first day I was in town an eight-foot tall hellhound followed me down the street, eying my fat ass! The last time I looked out the window there was a DRAGON flying around out there, washing the windows! I'm a rabbit, Evan! A rabbit! Everything eats rabbit!"

That gave the eevee pause, but he pushed forward anyway. "Er, well honestly, it's not so bad once you get used to it. There are hundreds of different kinds of 'mon in the world, and most of them are harmless-" And a pause, as he reconsidered that. Harmless wasn't really the right word to use for most pokemon. "Er, friendly. Most of them are friendly enough."

He smiled reassuringly, his ears slanted forward. "But I hear you. Maybe you should just start out small? Go around the building and meet your neighbors? I'm sure once you get to know them a bit, you'll realize that they're just people. Weird looking people."

Bunnie's ears skewed, her nose scrunched up distastefully. "My neighbor is a vampire."

"Who, the zubat?" Evan chuckled, his head shaking slightly. "Yeah, I met her. She's... uh... I'm sure she's not so bad."

Bunnie huffed, fixing her baleful gaze on the eevee. "She stares at me, Evan! Every time I try to set foot outside the loft, she watches me! I dunno how she does it, but she always knows!"

Evan couldn't help but smile at that. A part of him was ready to launch into a lecture about the miraculous hearing abilities of the zubat species, but he managed to quash the urge. "Yeah, uh, I caught a bit of that myself. Maybe she just likes you?"

Bunnie reached over the couch, her brown-furred fingers wrapping about the shorter eevee's shoulders to shake him. "She's a vampire, Evan! The only thing she likes about me is my sweet, delicious blood! I can't talk to her! I can't talk to anyone!"

Evan's head bobbled violently as the lopunny shook him, but he managed to keep his brain from rattling long enough to come up with a response. "You're- agh! But you're talking to me!"

The female stopped abruptly, her fingers still set against the eevee's shoulders but only lightly now. "I-... well yeah, but... but you're nice."

Evan smiled, his lip curling back just far enough to show one of his more prominent canine teeth. "Oh yeah?"

"Yeah!" Bunnie beamed, a broad smile on her face. She was clearly unperturbed by the male's display, although she at least seemed to notice it. "I mean, you're a dog and all, but... you're also... uh..."

The eevee arched a brow, but he patiently remained silent.

"Cute." Bunnie finally finished, her head bobbing smartly. "Definitely cute."

Evan snorted back a laugh, his ears flicking forward. "Oh, good. For a minute there I thought you were going to say it was because I was short."

Bunnie stuck her tongue out, her ears flattened as she set one hand to the top of her head. "Oh please, like I've got any room to call someone short. I'm, like, four-foot-ten without the ears. Have you seen my sister? She's like a foot taller than me!"

"Seven inches taller," Evan chuckled. "She's five-foot-six. Trust me, I know exactly how tall she is, because she's almost a foot taller than ME. She calls me the runt of the Fighting Dojo."

The lopunny uttered a high-pitched giggle, but she quickly muffled it by covering her muzzle with both paws. The two sat in silence for a long moment, until Bunnie finally spoke up again. "Sorry," she snickered again. "My sister is kind've a bitch."

Evan snerked, trying hard to choke back a laugh and failing miserably. Laughing hard, he set one hand to his muzzle, gasping for breath. "I-... ha, wasn't-pfft." And a pause, as he steadied himself. "Well, I wasn't going to, heh, say anything."

Bunnie sighed happily, slouching against the back of the couch as she grinned. "You know why she wouldn't go buy new clothes for me?"

Evan glanced sidelong toward the lagomorph, then shook his head.

"Cuz she said she didn't want to be an enabler." Bunnie snorted, her whiskers twitching. "I love her, but yeah. She's totally a bitch sometimes."

The eevee smiled, absently rubbing at the back of his head. "Well, ah... I'm sure you'd find at least a couple dozen guys down at the gym who'd agree with you on that. You know, she's the third best fighter we've got? Maybe even second, depending on how she does in the next exhibition match."

Bunnie rolled her eyes. "Yeah, she's mentioned it a few times."

Evan's smile faded, his head tilting back a bit as he looked to the bunny once more. "But she has a point. I mean, she wouldn't have sent me here if she didn't genuinely think you have a problem."

The lopunny's smile vanished as well, her shoulders slumping some. "Yeah, I know."

"Here," Evan shifted against the couch, one hand planted against the armrest as if ready to push back onto his feet. "I'll go get you some clothes that fit, and we can work from there. What are your new measurements?"

"I, uh-" Bunnie frowned, peeking down at herself. "I dunno. Fat?"

Evan skewed an ear, but took it in stride. "Er, okay. Well, why don't you come around the couch so I can get a better look at you? I can make a guess at it."

And the lopunny retreated back behind the couch, until only her eartips were visible. "No, you'll see how fat I am! Then you won't talk to me anymore!"

Evan rubbed his temple, reflexively uttering an exasperated sigh. "Bunnie... I train alongside some of the ugliest 'mon you'll ever meet. One of them is, and I kid you not, an ambulatory puddle of mud. Another one is a seven-foot-tall bug with scythes for arms. I'm not going to judge you."

Bunnie peeked back over the top of the couch, biting her lower lip. She considered the eevee's words for a long moment, and finally mustered up the nerve to give him a quick nod. She slipped to her feet, moved out from behind the couch, and quickly averted her gaze to avoid Evan's wrathful, judging gaze.

"Hrm," Evan mused thoughtfully. "This would probably work better if the lights were on."

The lopunny sssssiiighed, the sound like that of someone who's just been informed that they had just one more month to live. It was a resigned sound, but it did succeed at cutting through her mounting apprehension. She pointed mutely at the light switch, and Evan quickly moved over to flick it. Light flooded the room, the fixture just over Bunnie's head illuminating her like as if it were a spotlight.

Evan turned back about, his head cocked slightly as he gave the lopunny a quick look. This was the first time he'd really gotten a good look at her, since she was normally such an elusive creature - and even when she'd been trying to bulldoze him out into the hallway she'd been moving to close and too quickly for a proper view. Now, though...

"Oh," the eevee murmured without thinking. "Wow."

Bunnie bit her lower lip again, her ears slicked back. Her arms curled across her midsection, just below her breasts. "I told you. I'm fat. At-... at least when I was still a buneary, my fur covered it up, but now my fur is all stupid-short and... and..."

Evan held up a hand, a smile slowly spreading across his muzzle. "Ah, Bunnie. I-... I wouldn't exactly call you... uh... 'fat' isn't the word that springs to mind."

Bunnie's nose wrinkled again, her eyes narrowing as if she thought the eevee might be teasing her. Her creamy brown-furred hands, slightly too large for her body, pinched at the pudge that spilled over her too-tight shorts. She certainly didn't have a potbelly, but there was no denying that she was pudgier than her lanky sibling. "Then what do you call THIS!?"

"That's-" The male laughed, his ears twitching forward. "It's cute, Bunnie. And the, uh... you've got the whole..."

The lopunny scowled, seeming certain that Evan was teasing her now. "What?"

Evan cleared his throat, quickly forcing himself back to an even, clinical tone. His hands swept outward as if tracing an hourglass. "Trust me, Bunnie. Your waistline is NOT the first thing that most guys are going to notice. You're... ah..."

Bunnie groaned, her paws setting to her hips. "Arceus, I know. My legs are so huge now. I barely even fit into my gym shorts anymore, and my stupid chest is so big that I can't even get my shirt past my belly button!"

Evan fidgeted, an ear twitching as he glanced over the lagomorph again. Beating around the bush wasn't getting him anywhere, so he finally opted for the blunt approach. "Bunnie, you're beautiful."

"What?" Bunnie snorted, her disbelief evident. "No I'm not."

The eevee persisted, taking a few steps toward the lopunny. She shied back a step, but this time she didn't lunge behind the furniture for safety. "You are. You're almost... no, you ARE ridiculously hot. I don't know if you've just been avoiding mirrors or... or if you're just in denial, but you have the kind of figure that most femme'mon would kill for."

Bunnie peeked downward, her crossed arms hiking up a bit to pull her breasts upward. It made it kind of hard for her to see the rest of her body. "But my sister..."

"Your sister is..." Evan paused, his ears perked. "She's beautiful too, but in a different way. She's taller and more athletic, sure, but you're... voluptuous. And it's- I, uh... it's actually kind of hard for me to look at you, because of the way you're dressed."

Bunnie cocked her head now, her ears swaying to one side as she tried to get a better look at herself. She was wearing her old high school gym uniform. It had probably been baggy, once, but now it barely fit. Her gray shorts barely managed to squeeze past the upper quarter of her well-padded thighs, and the elastic in the waist was strained to the point of breaking trying. Her shirt was even more problematic, because the ample swell of her chest bunched all the fabric at her front. She had obviously stretched the collar far out of shape just to get it to fit better, but it was still hugging her almost as if it were a tube top, with more than a bit of her generously curved breasts peeking out both above and below the fabric. It left her midsection bare from the bottom of her ribs to the top of her wide hips.

"Yeah," she sighed, completely missing the point. "I'm dressed like a slob."

"No!" Evan quickly protested. "That's not-! Look, Bunnie, I work at a gym! People wear sweats there all the time, so- I just..." He paused, drawing in a deep breath in an effort to steady himself. Looking at the lopunny was definitely distracting, so he finally tore his eyes off of her frame and looked toward the door instead. Maybe turning the lights on really HAD been a bad idea.

"You're very... lovely." He stated simply. "And your current, ah, outfit shows a LOT of fur. It's... almost indecent. If you were wondering why people were staring at you on the street, it's probably because you're incredibly attractive, and incredibly underdressed."

Bunnie still seemed skeptical, but less than she had a moment ago. Her hands moved to her heavy chest, squashing them some against her ribs. "Wait, so guys like a girl who-?"

"Yes." Evan quickly bobbed his head, peeking sidelong at the lopunny. "I mean, ah, it varies from guy to guy, but a lot of them like a gal who's... busty."

Bunnie arched a brow, her hands moving down to her wide hips. Her furred fingers traced over the wide contours, past the fabric of her tight shorts and halfway down her bare thighs. "And-?"

Evan nodded again, this time sparing a quick glance in the lapine's direction. "Oh yes. Definitely. I, er... I mean some guys prefer gals who are athletic like your sister, but you'll find plenty of guys who prefer someone with your build."

The lopunny paused, her eyes half-closing as she adopted a vaguely cagey expression. "What about you, Evan? Which one do you prefer?"

"Oh!" The eevee coughed, his ears bolt upright. "W-... well, ah, both types of build have... ah... have their appeal, of course. I'd hate to... I mean I'd never... er..."

Bunnie giggled, her hands set back to her hips as she tried to look the stammering male in the eye. This was something she could rather get used to. "Do YOU think I'm attractive, Evan?"

Evan rubbed the back of his neck, his gaze turned toward the ceiling as he hemmed and hawed. "I wouldn't want to, ah... I mean, I don't know if it's appropriate to... to just..."

The lopunny pouted, her arms folding back against her midsection and her lower lip quivering. "You don't."

Evan groaned, a hand set to his forehead. "I DO! Er, I mean... I do. You're incredibly, fantastically attractive to me, Bunnie. It's... I just don't want to make this weird."

"Oh," Bunnie chirped, brightly. "Okay!"

And she paused briefly, before that cagey look returned. She took a step closer, her ears swaying forward. "Evan, do you think I'm more attractive than my sister?"

That gave the eevee pause. "Er, please don't make me answer that."

Bunnie cocked her head to the other side, her pout quickly returning. "Because you think it'd hurt my feelings?"

"No," Evan sighed. "Because if your sister found out the answer, she'd kick my ass. And I really don't need to give her more excuses to kick my ass. I barely survive our sparring sessions, as it is."

The lopunny giggled harder, one hand set to her petite muzzle to stifle her mirth. It muffled the sound, but did nothing to still the jiggling that ran through her entire frame. It was a sight that had previously been obscured by darkness and the bulk of a couch, and seeing it full-on was akin to stepping out into the middle of the street only to then notice a two-ton truck barreling toward you.

"Buh-" Evan mumbled, his eyes wide. "Wubbuh..."

Bunnie paused, one ear slanted toward the flabbergasted canine. "What?"

"Bluh." Evan responded, eloquently. He shook his head vigorously, then quickly raised his hand to act as an improvised blinder. The second he had blotted out the sight of Bunnie's body, he found that his brain started working again. "I mean, uh, okay. I think I've got a pretty good idea of your measurements now. I'm, er... just going to run out and get you some clothes that fit properly. Then we can-"

"Wait, Evan." Bunnie quickly interrupted, her ears perked.

Evan fell silent, but he didn't lower his hand. The sooner he got those curves at least partially covered up, the better. "Mm?"

"If those guys in the street weren't staring at me because they wanted to eat me-" Bunnie's brow furrowed, then arched as her eyes widened. Her tone was horrified, and just the slightest bit intrigued. "Then was it because they wanted to ravish me?"

"Er," Evan hesitated, his ears skewed. This promised to be an even more awkward topic than the last one had been. "Well, maybe one or two of them, but most people have the willpower to resist acting on their every hormonal urge. I mean, it probably isn't a good idea to actively taunt or encourage them, but-"

Bunnie balled up a fist, smacking it against the palm of her other hand. "I need to learn how to defend myself from perverts!"

The eevee blinked, his hand lowered slightly as he peeked over it toward the lopunny. "Oh, uh... well that's actually a pretty good idea. I mean, I seriously doubt anyone would just attack you in the middle of the street - Saffron City's got a pretty serious police force - but... yeah. Better safe than sorry."

Bunnie beamed, her smile so wide that it threatened to split her face in half. "Will you teach me?"

"Ah," Evan coughed. "Well, don't you think your sister would be better suited for that...?"

Bunnie's smile vanished, her expression suddenly deadpan. "Does Bonnie teach you things at the fighting dojo?"

Evan paused, then nodded. He had the feeling that this was a trick question of some sort, but he decided to ride it out. "Sure. She's one of our best fighters, so she tends to pick up the slack when our sensei is too busy for one-on-one lessons."

Bunnie cocked her jaw, one brow arched. "Do you enjoy having her teach you?"

"Oh," Evan snorted, realization setting in. "Arceus, no. Okay, I see where you're coming from."

Bunnie brightened again, bouncing sharply as she tried to suppress her glee. "So you'll teach me!?"

Bobbed his head slightly, but more to follow the female's bouncing motion than because he wanted to nod. He caught himself a split second later, his hand coming back up to again block his line of sight. "W-... well, er... I don't-"

The lopunny's pout promptly returned, and she moved about to put herself back into the eevee's field of view. She was quickly learning to weaponize the expression, much as she had when she was dealing with her parents at a much younger age - and from the male's obvious wavering it seemed super effective. "Please? Like, isn't this why Bonnie sent you over here in the first place?"

"That's-" Evan hesitated, then lowered his hand again. His ears twitched back, his shoulders rolling in a slight shrug. He gestured vaguely, as if to encompass both his shortness and his slim build in one motion. "That's not exactly why she chose me. She, er... thought that I'd be the least threatening."

That wasn't exactly how Bonnie had put it, but he found it preferable to what she had actually said. Her exact words had been more along the lines of: "If my sister is scared of a poofy runt like you, then she's hopeless."

"Oh!" Bunnie bounced again, oblivious to how the canine's head bobbed in time with the motion. "Oh oh oh! You're plenty threatening! And you're a regular at the gym, right? So, like, you're probably super-great at fighting! Pleeeease, Evan! Please?"

Evan blushed, trying to steel himself for a proper response. There was nothing good that could come from agreeing to the lopunny's request, so the smart thing to do was to politely decline. He could probably get one of the other femme'mon at the gym to come around some time, to give the lopunny some proper lessons. He just had to make it clear that he wasn't interested.

"I'd love to." He stated, very matter-of-factly.

His ear twitched, his brain catching up with his hormones a second too late. "Wait, wha-?"

"Eeee!" Bunnie bounced forward in two quick steps, her arms flung about the eevee as she hugged him close. "Thank you thank you thank you! You're the greatest, Evan!"

"Mmnnnmf!" Evan responded, his muzzle buried halfway down the lopunny's cleavage. His shorter stature combined with the lopunny's wild embrace had firmly squashed his face right against her chest, and it was several seconds before the female realized his plight.

She quickly pulled back, her eartips reddened as she dragged the eevee back up for air. "Ohmygosh, Evan! I'm so sorry! Are you okay?"

"W-...wu-..." The male wobbled, his eyes distant. "Eevee?"

He caught himself, his head shaking vigorously as he tried to shuck off his primitive, ancestral urges. Ears twitching back and forth, he squinted his eyes shut, fingers planted to the bridge of his muzzle as he focused himself on something as non-sexy as possible. It took him a few more seconds, but some serious musing on sports statistics managed to nudge him back to a more coherent state of mind.

"M'fine," he mumbled, his eyes snapping back open but firmly averted in the other direction. "I'm fine. I, uh... but yeah, I can give you some pointers. I'll just go grab you some proper workout clothes, and then-"

Bunnie frowned, her ears swaying back. "After? But what if something happens while you're gone?"

Evan snorted softly, but this time he resisted the urge to eye the lopunny. That was a path to quick, mind-obliterating ruin. If she bounced around any more, he'd agree to anything. "That's HIGHLY unlikely. You live on the third story of a private apartment complex."

Bunnie arched a brow, her expression even. "My next door neighbor is a vampire, Evan."

"She sleeps during the day!" Evan huffed, his exasperation finally getting the better of him. "If anything, you should worry about her coming for you in the middle of the night!"

The lopunny squeaked, her paws slapping over her muzzle and her eyes wide with horror. "That's not helping!"

"Ugh," Evan groaned. Still, he bobbed his head, reluctantly moving away from the door. "Fine, but... just a few quick lessons. Then I'll-... ah... then..."

He paused, his ears skewed as he dared another look back toward the grinning lapine. "You're sure you don't have anything else to wear...?"

Bunnie flounced over to the middle of the room with Evan, a distinct bounce to each and every step. "Nope! But it shouldn't matter, right? You said that you see people in gym clothes every day!"

"Not like THOSE, I don't..." Evan mumbled the last bit under his breath, and only the slightest twitch of the lopunny's ears hinted that she might have heard him. He managed a smile, put some more serious thought into sports statistics to quash his surging hormones, and then set about shoving furniture out of the way.

"Fine," he grunted, louder now. He pushed the couch back, then a coffee table, and then a few chairs. "Let's get started, then. Some quick pointers, maybe some mock sparring, and THEN I'll get those clothes for you."

"Deal!" Bunnie squealed gleefully, her thick ankles flexing as she bounced again. Her brows arched, her grin wide. "If-... if I feel like I've learned enough to defend myself, maybe I'll even go WITH you when you buy me some new clothes!"

Evan blinked, an ear twitching. Wait, now HE was supposed to be paying for-? He shook his head slightly, shaking off the errant thought before it could get too far. There were more important things to focus on at the moment, chief among them an eighty-percent nude femme'mon who seemed intent on bouncing her way right out of her top.

"Fine." He reiterated, trying to maintain a professional demeanor. He pushed the last of the furniture clear, until the wide rug at the center of the room was left bare. That done, he looked back to Bunnie, forcing himself to keep his gaze steady on her face. "F-fine!"

Bunnie grinned back at him, her eyes sparkling. She agreed with him enthusiastically. "Fine!"

Evan moved onto the rug, drawing in a slow breath as he tried to decide where to begin. He didn't normally teach classes, but he'd watched plenty of the better fighters at the Fighting Dojo teach them. He thought back to his earliest lessons, then bobbed his head calmly. 'Right, uh... so first, what do you know about fighting?"

"Well," Bunnie tapped her muzzle thoughtfully. "I dunno. I guess I've watched some movies with fighting? And, um... sometimes I'd visit the gym when I'd come to visit Bonnie. Like, before I... evolved, I mean."

"Ah," Evan smiled. "So you did get some lessons, then?"

Bunnie pursed her lips. "No, I mostly just watched. And, um, took naps when I got bored?"

Evan sighed. "Of course."

The lopunny smiled half-heartedly, her hands clasped in front of her. "Sorry?"

"No," Evan waved off the apology. "It's fine. Just needed to know where to start. Do you carry anything for self-defense?"

Bunnie pursed her lips again, her brow furrowed. "Like what?"

The eevee gestured, his hand waving vaguely in the air. "Like a can of mace, or a stungun? Something that you can use to incapacitate an attacker long enough to get away."

Bunnie frowned. "No. Besides, I thought you were gonna teach me how to, like, beat people up. Then I won't HAVE to run away!"

"No." Evan's tone was firmer this time, the corners of his mouth curled downward as he mirrored the lopunny's frown. "Look, the first thing you need to realize is that the best way to keep yourself safe is to end fights as quickly as possible. You don't have to win, you just have to get away before you lose."

The lopunny huffed, but she didn't say anything.

Evan gestured again, his open palm facing upward. "Get a can of mace AND a stungun. Maybe even a pistol or a knife, if you're comfortable with carrying a concealed weapon. Just remember, never try using mace on a poison-type, and never try using a stungun on an electric type. It might seem obvious, but when your adrenaline is flowing it's easy to forget all about types."

Bunnie nodded diligently, her ears perked and her barely suppressed disappointment vanishing in a flash. "Okay."

"Now," Evan mused. "Do you have any TMs?"

Bunnie quickly shook her head, one ear skewed.

The eevee bobbed his head again, more at ease now that the femme'mon didn't seem intent on teasing or manipulating him. "You'll want to do some research on them. See what kind of TMs are compatible with your species. Bonnie can definitely help you with that, since she's related to you. Get three or four of them, but try to make sure they compliment each other. Don't just grab the first four that catch your eye."

Bunnie frowned, her whiskers twitching. "Wait, can't I just buy more than four?"

Evan hesitated, then cleared his throat to buy himself a few seconds to think. That was a... delicate subject, and one that he'd need an advanced degree in pokenatomy to even hope to answer. He, of course, had no such degree. "It's complicated. I mean, ah, Technical Machines are one part audio-visual tutor and one part... I don't know, gene resequencer? They kind of program you with new muscle memories and make it possible to do things that might otherwise be completely impossible. Some of them might just make you a better fighter, but others could theoretically let you shoot beams from your eyes or vomit poison onto your opponents."

He cleared his throat again, making a vague gesture with one finger. "Just, uh, everyone's got a different limit on exactly how much they can recode themselves. Trust me, you don't want to find out what that limit is. At best, you just start forgetting how to use older moves when you learn a new one, but sometimes you get... glitchy. Four is a safe number. Stick to four, unless you've got a nurse on standby."

"Only four!" Bunnie quickly agreed, her expression apprehensive. "Got it!"

And a pause, before she cocked her head. "How many do you have?"

Evan blinked, seeming a bit surprised by the question. "Who, me? Oh, uh... none. I mean, I've had my eye on a couple. Hidden power, maybe, or substitute - that one's pretty useful, so you might want to check it out. But I've been holding off until I evolve. I mean, uh, if I decide to evolve at all, that is. It's-"

The eevee frowned, then gestured dismissively. "It's not important. Just, uh, suffice to say that you're kind of lucky. You evolve automatically just by getting older, but some of us have to use evolutionary stones and just hope we're in the right mindset when it happens. It's a whole big deal for guys like me. If I'm not careful about what I touch or how I feel, then WHAM - one day I'm suddenly breathing fire or made of plants or something."

Bunnie blinked. And here she thought SHE'D had it rough. "Yikes."

"Yeah," Evan chuckled. "Yikes."

There was an awkward silence for a few fleeting seconds, and then the eevee gestured toward the lopunny's body. "Anyway, it's a lot safer to just train yourself instead of relying entirely on TMs. That's kind of what the Fighting Dojo is all about. I know plenty of techniques, but I learned every one of them the hard way. You're a normal type, too, so plenty of physical moves should come naturally to you with a bit of training."

"Here," Evan smiled. He moved up, his hands raised with his palms pointed outward. "Go ahead and punch my hand. Let me see how strong you are."

"Oh!" Bunnie wobbled uncertainly, then stepped forward to meet the eevee halfway. "Okay!"

She balled up one fist, then launched it as hard as she could at one of the canine's hands. It smacked into Evan's palm with a soft 'phud' of impact, like a pillow swatting ineffectually at a tree.

"That was, uh..." Evan twitched an ear, reminding himself that he needed to be encouraging. "That was... great. But, uh, maybe punching isn't your thing. At least not until we've built up some arm strength, anyway. Let's try some kicking instead."

Bunnie stuck her tongue out a bit, but obediently moved into a new position. Her legs were long and thick, but she wasn't really sure how to go through the motion. She had played soccer once, when she was twelve, but that was over half a decade ago. Finally, she just opted to square off and lashed out a front-kick as fast and hard as she could.

Evan caught her foot, then uttered a surprised yelp as it went crashing right through his guard, thumping squarely into his chest with enough force to drive him to the ground. He was suddenly on his back, breathless and gasping, with the ceiling swimming unsteadily above him. "Hhff... w-... wha-...?"

"Oh no!" Bunnie was at his side in an instant, her paws at the male's cheeks. "Evan! Are you okay!? I didn't mean to- I thought you'd stop it! Are you dying? Should I call someone!?"

The eevee sucked in a deep breath, then forced himself up into a sitting position. His ears twitched back, his hand at his aching ribs as he steadied himself. "Nuh-... no, no. I'm... oof... I'm fine. Hff... I was just... hh... that caught me off-guard. But, uh, that's a good thing! Means you're a lot... hf... a lot stronger than I thought."

"Oh!" Bunnie grinned, quickly offering the male a hand. She pulled him back to his feet, then stepped back into her best approximation of a fighting position again. "Good!"

Evan sucked in another deep breath, then looked back to the bouncing bunny. "Erf... yeah, it's very good. It means we know to focus on kicking, for now. We might even want to look into getting you some kickboxing lessons, later. That was a good kick, but it was clumsy - like you were trying to kick a football instead of a person."

"Kickboxing?" Bunnie quirked one corner of her mouth downward, not sure if she should be disappointed or not. "Not, like, kung-fu or karate or something?"

Evan snorted, a faint smile on his muzzle as he shook his head. "Not unless you want to spend the next ten years mastering it. Martial arts are... well, they're not a bad idea, but for a rookie like you it's probably a better idea to start you off with something a bit more practical. At the very least, we should hold off on advanced fighting theory until you've figured out your new center of gravity."

Bunnie blushed, her index fingers tapping together. "Oh, you... uh... noticed. It's just that, um, I'm way more... I'm bigger now, and... um..."

"Trust me," Evan raised a hand quickly, eager to stop the lopunny. "I've noticed."

And a sigh, as he noticed that he'd torn his jacket. It was no surprise, given how hard the lopunny had managed to hit him. He quickly shucked the garment before it could be shredded any further, tossing it aside onto the couch before he turned back toward the femme.

Bunnie snerked.

Evan frowned, eying the lopunny as her paws flew back to her muzzle. He glanced down at himself, absently tugging at his undershirt. He had a slim but athletic build, although his smaller stature admittedly made him look more scrawny than athletic. His undershirt and jeans wrapped tightly against his slim frame, although the lopunny seemed to be staring at his-

"Oh," he sighed. His hand brushed against the poofy mane that had almost literally exploded out of his jacket the second he had stripped it off. It wasn't something he could really control, since the scruffy mane just went hand-in-hand with being an eevee. He could shave it easily enough, but only if he was ready to continue shaving it on a daily basis. "Of course."

"You're so adorable!" Bunnie gushed, stifling another pitched giggle.

This was hardly an unusual reaction, so Evan patiently waited for the lopunny to get it out of her system. Tch... it was things like this that really made him put some serious thought toward evolving. After a long moment it seemed like Bunnie had finally gotten her giggles under control, so the eevee faced off with her again.

"Look," Evan sighed. "Let's just try a quick exercise, okay?"

Bunnie bobbed her head quickly, in silent agreement.

Evan raised his hands in front of him, his blunted claws waggling menacingly. "Great. Now let's pretend I'm a mugger who's decided you look like an easy target. I've cornered you in a dark alley, and I'm demanding your purse. What do you do?"

Bunnie frowned, trying to imagine the little eevee as a mugger. From her grin, it was obvious that she was still having a hard time trying to think of him as anything but adorably cute. "I guess I give you my purse, then? I-... should I go get my purse?"

"No-" Evan sighed, a hand set to his forehead. "We're going to assume that you don't WANT to give your purse away to the first person who demands it, okay?"

"Oh," Bunnie brightened, her ears slanting forward. "Sorry. Okay, lemme try again."

"Right, good." Evan smiled faintly, then tried to put on his best 'tough guy' voice. "Now, grr. Hand over the purse, lady!"

Bunnie snerked again, her hands flying back to her muzzle as she tried - and failed - to stifle another giggle.

The eevee deadpanned, his hands lowered. "What?"

"You're so CUTE!" The lopunny giggled, bouncing a little. "And the way you did that voice! Adorable!"

Evan rolled his eyes, one hand held out half-heartedly. His voice was monotone this time, as he tried to sound as unadorable as possible. "Arceus. Ugh, fine, just... hand over the purse and no one gets hurt."

Bunnie crossed her arms, her muzzle turned up aloofly. "No."

And a pause, as Evan waited for her to do something - anything - else. The lopunny peeked back down at the eevee, then shrugged.

"Uh..." She floundered a bit. "No... please?"

Evan sighed, then stepped forward. "Most thugs aren't going to go away because you asked them politely. Telling them 'no' is just going to get them to make a grab for you or your bag. Maybe rough you up a little. And what if they want MORE than just your purse?"

"Oh," Bunnie sounded small now, her eyes wide as she envisioned being savaged by some brutish 'mon. "I- uh, I guess I'd call the police?"

Evan cocked his head, one hand held palm-upward. "They're not going to wait for you to finish a phonecall."

Bunnie pouted now, her lower lip quivering. "I'd run!"

The eevee hesitated, his tone softening as he tried to avoid pushing the lopunny too far. "Okay, sure, that'd work about... let's say a third of the time. It's not a bad move, if you've got an opening for it. But what if you can't run, or they can run faster than you?"

"I-" the lopunny pouted, her shoulders slumping again. She seemed on the verge of tears, mumbling half-heartedly. "I dunno."

"Hey," Evan gestured quickly, moving in to comfort the femme'mon. "Woah, don't- look, this is why we're doing this. To give you a better idea of how to respond when you're threatened, and you can't just get clear."

Bunnie snuffled, one furred hand mopping at her eyes as she tried to bite back tears. She looked miserable. "I don't-... this was a bad idea."

The eevee frowned, stepping back again as he eyed Bunnie. There were a dozen ways he could respond to her protest, and he finally opted to simply ignore it. He wasn't about to let her back out now. Not when they'd made such good progress. He raised his hands in front of him again, palms outward. "Here, try to punch me again."

That wasn't the response that Bunnie seemed to expect, so it took her a second to shift her train of thought from one track to another. She blinked, looking to the male's face and then to his hands, and back. Between her height and her curves, she probably massed a good thirty or forty pounds heavier than the eevee.

She frowned, asking for clarification. "Your hands?"

Evan shook his head. "No, try to get past my hands. Try to hit me."

Bunnie furrowed her brow, her head cocked. At best, Evan was a hundred-and-twenty pounds sopping wet, poofy mane and all. Her voice was heavy with skepticism when she spoke again. "Are you sure? I don't, like, wanna hurt you or something."

"I..." Evan glanced at the lopunny's slim arms, his expression equally skeptical. He had already felt her sting once, and he was absolutely certain he could take it again. He smiled reassuringly, his hands lifted again and his tone a bit smug. "I'm sure I'll be just fine, Bun."

Bunnie scowled a bit at the canine's patronizing tone, and she promptly balled her fists back up. One arm darted out, quick as lightning, swiping over the eevee's guard and bopping him right on the nose.

"Ack!" Evan quickly recoiled, his hands darting to his muzzle defensively. The shot had been more surprising than painful, but it had certainly caught him off-guard. "What was THAT?"

Bunnie's scowl deepened, her ears slanted forward and her eyes narrowed. "You told me to punch you!"

Evan sniffed derisively, his hands swinging back into a defensive position. "That was like a warm summer breeze. Come on, harder! Give it all you've got!"

Bunnie balked, chewing on her lip for a second as she rethought her stance. She tried taking a stance that she presumably remembered seeing in some boxer movie or another, and bounced heavily on her thick toes. That distracted Evan all over again, but the lopunny still didn't seem to notice.

She fired off another quick jab, but this time Evan smacked it aside.

"No," Evan chided. "Harder!"

Bunnie huffed, stomping her foot against the ground. "That's as hard as I can do it!"

Evan clicked his tongue against his teeth, thoughtfully, and he lowered his hands. "Okay, look. You're fast. Really fast. But you've got no upper body strength, and your legs are strong but slow. You need to get your opponent off-balance first, with some quick attacks to their weak points, and then when they're distracted you can finish them with a good kick or two."

"Oh!" Bunnie brightened, but then she cocked her head quizzically. "I don't get it."

Evan cleared his throat, then gestured simply. "When your life is in danger, the main thing you're going to want to remember is that you can either fight fair, or you can fight to win."

"Wait," the lopunny frowned now. "So you're saying I should, like, fight dirty?"

Evan bobbed his head in a quick nod, gesturing again. "Sure. The only thing that matters in a street fight is who's standing, after. It's only those goofballs in the movies who can afford to fight fair, because they're usually black belts or arena veterans. Plus, you know, most of those fights are choreographed anyway."

Bunnie's frown deepened, but she mirrored Evan's nod. "I... guess that makes sense."

The eevee gestured again, this time tapping different parts of his body in rapid succession. "Great. So, you had it right the first time around. In most brawls, you're going to want to go for four or five basic areas. The eyes and the nose-" He gestured at his face, then lowered his hand to his neck. "The throat."

He gestured lower again, tapping his elbow and then his knee. "The back or side of the joints. And, er..." Evan paused now, his ears twitching back to hide the fact that they were suddenly reddening at the tips.

Bunnie cocked her head a bit, one ear tilted toward the male curiously.

"And, ah..." Evan coughed lightly, his eartips reddening further. "And the genitals."

"Ah!" The lopunny blushed deep, quickly outpacing the male in embarrassment - but at the same time, she couldn't help but utter a wavering giggle. "But doesn't that HURT!?"

Evan cleared his throat uncomfortably, his gaze averted. "Er, well, yeah. But that's kind of the idea, Bun. The whole point of going for any of these areas is to maim or cripple an opponent long enough to run away. A guy's going to have an awfully hard time chasing after you if they're too busy clutching their face or their groin."

"Ssssooo..." Bunnie grinned broadly, her eyes narrowing a bit. "If a guy tries to attack me, I should just punt them in the balls and run?"

The eevee hesitated again, even longer this time. He suddenly felt very much like a minnow being sized up by a shark, and he was terribly aware that the taller lopunny was eying his crotch. Under any other circumstances that might have been arousing, but at the moment it was just... unsettling. "Ah, well, it's not quite THAT easy. Most guys - or, uh, gals for that matter - are going to be very protective of their-, uh... of that general area. The trick is to distract them first, so their guard is somewhere else."

Bunnie furrowed her brow, her eyes darting back up to Evan's face. She didn't say anything, but her confusion was evident.

Evan smiled a bit, more than a little relieved to have the lopunny's gaze back above his waist. "Relax, it's easier than it sounds. There are some pretty simple tricks to it, as long as your opponent's not a trained fighter. You're fast, right? So it's just a matter of distracting them with a fake attack, and then making a real attack once they're busy trying to stop the fake one."

The lopunny cocked her jaw now, both ears skewed. But still, she said nothing.

Evan chuckled, gesturing with his fingers. "Here, I'll show you. Move like you're about to kick me between the legs."

"Wait-" Bunnie balked, suddenly reluctant. She had obviously been tickled at the idea of kicking some unfortunate fellow between the legs just a moment earlier, but now the thought of actually DOING it seemed to make her nervous. "You want me to kick you in the balls!?"

"No!" Evan squeaked, his voice lilted with panic. His hands dipped downward, as if to shield his crotch, although both 'mon knew that one of the lopunny's kicks could easily plow right through his guard if she wanted it to. He drew in a quick breath, then evened his tone. "No, ah... definitely not! I want you to ACT like you're going to kick me in the, er, balls."

"Ohhh," Bunnie laughed, at ease again. "Okay, that makes more sense."

Evan narrowed his eyes, his hands still guarding his crotch. "But don't actually do it."

"Right!" Bunnie giggled, an odd glint in her eyes. For the umpteenth time in the past hour, Evan wished he could see what thoughts were grinding away behind those suddenly mischievous eyes.

The eevee let out a slow breath, working up his nerve, and then he finally slid his hands away from his groin. If Bunnie was anything like her sister, she'd gleefully take a shot at his 'nads - and probably do it for real, just out of spite. He was hoping to Arceus that Bunnie wasn't like her sister in that regard. With a gesture, he gave the female a silent go-ahead.

The lopunny shifted a bit, a thin grin spreading across her muzzle as her eyes slid back downward. The male was wearing jeans, so it's not like she could actually see anything - or even the outline of anything - but still. The male couldn't help but shiver a bit, tingling almost as if he could feel her gaze washing over him. She shifted, and the tingling promptly turned into a chill along the eevee's spine as Bunnie hauled her right leg back as if preparing for a mighty punt-

Evan winced, an ear skewed. His fingers twitched a bit, eager to move back over his groin, but he managed to resist the urge.

Bunnie paused, her long ears twitching forward as she carefully watched the male's reaction. She quickly lowered her leg, planting her right foot against the ground instead. "Hold on, I think my left leg is stronger."

"G-... great..." Evan muttered through clenched teeth, one ear twitching just a bit spastically. "Just, er... r-... remember, you're not actually kicking me.

She snickered, but Bunnie gave another quick bob of her head. Her left leg hauled back this time, folding at the knee, and her elongated ankle rolled behind her as she limbered up her muscles. Evan couldn't help but tremble a bit, and he tried his utmost to blot out the sordid mental images of what might happen if she were to swing her leg forward at full force.

Honestly, from her expression it looked like Bunnie was kind of picturing that herself. She'd said that she had only ever seen fights in movies, and maybe a bit at the Fighting Dojo, so maybe she had no idea what kind of damage her strong legs could do? According to MOST movies, it was painful but relatively harmless, leaving a male hunched and soprano for the rest of a scene.

Evan's ear twitched, and he mentally bookmarked that thought. He was going to have to find some time later to explain just how dangerous this sort of thing was. Er, assuming she didn't just decide to nut him now just to satiate some kind of perverse curiosity. Not, uh, that he actually thought she would, but this was seeming like a worse idea by the second, so he-

Bunnie sniffed, evidently coming to some sort of conclusion. Her leg twitched forward, slowly as if she were pushing it through molasses. Evan uttered a soft sigh of relief, and his hands dipped downward to thump lightly against her shin just before the lopunny's toes could bump up against a very intimate region of his body.

"There," the male grunted. "Your front kick is strong, but it takes you a few seconds to line it up. That gives anyone you're fighting enough time to block or deflect your kick, but it means they've got their attention - and their hands - low."

Bunnie wriggled her nose a bit, precariously balanced on one foot. "So-?"

"So then you follow up with your real attack," Evan murmured patiently. "And you attack high."

"Oh!" Bunnie brightened again, and she dropped her leg quickly before leaning forward with a mock punch. She bopped her knuckles lightly against the eevee's nose, and this time Evan didn't try to block. "Like this?"

Evan chuckled, his head leaning back slightly to put some distance between his nose and the lopunny's fist. "Right. Although your, uh, punching isn't really your strong point, so you'd want to go for the eyes or the throat. Your fists are kind of like, er... big, fluffy pillows."

Bunnie scowled, bopping the eevee on the muzzle again - harder this time. He didn't even blink. The lopunny pulled her arm back, peeking at her hand. She bopped herself on the nose, experimentally, then sighed. "Yeah, okay. They ARE pretty soft."

Evan crooked a finger, beckoning, and Bunnie obediently offered one of her pillow-fists. The eevee quickly prised her hand back open, studying her blunted claws. They weren't much to look at, but they were serviceable.

"Yeah, here-" He pulled the lopunny's hand closer, and moved it across his face as if to rake her fingertips across his eyes. "Like this." And then he straightened two of her fingers, before pulling it gently as if he were stabbing her fingers into his eye. "Or like that."

Bunnie repeated the gestures, first one and then the other, then pulled her hand back to peer at her nails. "And that works?"

Evan arched a brow. "Do you like getting poked in the eye?"

Bunnie furrowed her brow, as if uncertain on how she was supposed to respond to that. "...no?"

Evan grinned. "Then yeah, it works."

One of the lopunny's ears twitched bolt upright, like a fuzzy exclamation point, and she grinned again. "So, like, would that same trick work if I did it the other way 'round?"

"Hm?" The eevee hesitated, then cocked his head. "What do you mean?"

"Like..." the lopunny shifted a bit, then her grin broadened. "Here, wait, lemme show you."

Evan nodded reluctantly, but obligingly moved back into his fighting stance. This time Bunnie hooked her fingers, then swiped her blunted clawtips at the male's face. He quickly moved his hands upward to protect his face, and the lopunny promptly flicked her left leg out in a vicious punting motion. Unlike last time, she didn't do it slowly.

"Erk!" The eevee's eyes widened, his hands shooting downward far too late once he realized the lapine's intent. It's not that he wasn't expecting her to aim low, but he certainly wasn't expecting her to do it at full speed!

Bunnie pulled back at the last second, her whole body bouncing hard as she tried to stop the kick just shy of her intended targets. Her zeal outweighed her restraint, though, and the knuckles of her curled toes thumped soundly into the crux of the male's spread thighs.

"Guh-" Evan squeaked, his hands slapping against the lopunny's raised ankle after the fact. Bunnie paled, her leg jerking back again, and the male quickly hunched over as his fingers curled between his legs. "Sh-... shit!"

Bunnie blushed hard, her hands back at her muzzle. "Sorry! I'm so sorry! I thought I could pull back before I hit you! I-... but I barely touched you, right? I didn't mean to-"

Evan coughed, hard, his ears skewed and his eyes closed to slits. Granted, it hadn't been a tremendous blow, but it certainly hadn't been a delicate one either. The femme'mon really didn't seem to know her own strength, which wasn't terribly unusual for someone who'd just gone through an evolution. Still, he wished she'd found that out in some way that hadn't involved kicking him in the 'nads.

Or, er, the 'nad anyway. The blow had been rather off-center, and the bulk of the impact had been driven into his inner thigh, but one or two toes had maliciously conspired to catch his right nut and crush it firmly against his tensed muscles. He'd certainly had worse, but having an orb squashed halfway out of shape was never a sensation that you got used to.

"Rrg..." he stifled a groan, wobbling a bit as he tried to will the pain away. It didn't work. In fact, the sharp ache of the initial impact just increased, moving from an intense spike to a dull and persistent throbbing that curled upward into his gut. He swallowed weakly, his breathing quickened as he-

The second wave of nausea hit him, and this time the eevee dropped to his knees. His panting redoubled, his head bowed as pain spasmed through his stomach. "A-... Arceus...!"

Bunnie fell silent, since it was obvious that her apologies were falling on deaf ears. She moved to help the male back to his feet, but when he made no motion to accept it she crouched down beside him instead. She had an odd expression on her muzzle, akin to barely suppressed elation or pride, but she was at least polite enough to put a token effort toward keeping a straight face.

One hand dashed to her muzzle, to better hide her expression, but the other dipped down to where Evan's hands were buried between his thighs. She couldn't actually reach the aching bits that he was shielding, so she kneaded a bit higher at what she COULD reach, and the sudden stiffening beneath her fingers seemed a good sign that she was helping.

A few long moments passed, and Evan slowly went from pained and nauseous to embarrassed and more than a little horny. His panting slowed, his breathing evening out, and the moment he seemed ready to push back to his feet Bunnie was at his side. She helped him back upright, then bounced back a few steps to resume her exaggerated fighting stance.

"I think I'm getting the hang of this!" She beamed, bouncing again. She had managed to quash her grin down to a thin smile, but it was hard to keep the chipper tone from her voice. "So, uh... like, do you think you're up for more?"

"Y-... yeah," Evan winced. "I just... hf... I'm fine. J-... just, uh, kind of wishing I'd worn a cup. Didn't think you'd... nnh... go for the low blow."

Bunnie giggled this time, before she could even think to stifle it. "Well I didn't mean to actually HIT them! I-... uh... it won't happen again, honest! I didn't know they were so delicate!"

The eevee groaned softly, but resisted the urge to cup his crotch again. The ache had mostly subsided, but he knew from experience that it would linger for at least an hour or two if not longer. It really was unpleasant. Still, it was important to put on a brave front - and to keep things moving along at a brisk enough pace to prevent the lopunny from realizing he now had an erection.

"No worries, Bun." He grunted. "I'm... hf... you only got one of them. It could have been worse."

Bunnie blinked, her gaze dipping as she peeked at the male's crotch again. It looked... different to her, somehow, although if she realized the eevee's predicament she didn't say anything. There was a definite glow about her, though, and that mischievous twinkle had returned to her eyes. Her gaze dipped further, to her leg, and she waggled her foot back and forth. "Wow, my foot's pretty wide, and I only got one of them? And it got THAT kind of reaction?"

She lowered her voice, her eyes wide. "Man, I kind'a hope someone tries to mug me, now. I'd love to try kicking someone for realsies."

Evan blanched, his hands promptly at his crotch, his eyes wide, and his ears slicked flat.

Bunnie scoffed. "Not YOU, silly. I like you! I mean, like, a real mugger or something! Or maybe just some guy who's a really big jerk!"

The eevee twitched a bit, slowly relaxing. He wasn't exactly put at ease by the female's reassurance, but it was better than nothing. "Hf... uh... okay, let's... let's just do something that doesn't involve kicking."

"Aw," Bunnie whined a bit. "Okay..."

The eevee moved behind Bunnie, and she started to turn around to face him. Before she could, though, he darted in and wrapped his arms about her waist, holding her fast.

Bunnie glanced down, but she couldn't see the males arms. Her rather ample bustline was in the way. Still, it was obvious what had just happened. "Uh, Evan...?"

"So you've just been grabbed from behind," Evan stated simply. "Now what do you do?"

The lopunny giggled, shifting a bit. She couldn't turn far enough to see the eevee, but she could fish around blindly with her hands until she found his arms. "I'd just wriggle free! This is kind of a half-assed grab. You're barely touching me!"

"Well, uh-" the eevee blushed some. Bunnie wriggled back against him, her back pressed to his chest and her rump pressed... somewhere very distracting, but she didn't say anything. "Mnf," Evan grunted. "I'm just... I don't want this to be weird, so-"

Bunnie reached down, snagging the male's hands firmly and then dragging them upward to her chest. She blushed some as well, but she steadfastly powered through her obvious embarrassment. "It's okay. This is just... this is, like, practice. I can't learn if you're going too easy on me!"

Evan stiffened at her back, in more ways than one, but after a few seconds of hyperventilation he managed to relax a bit. Er, mostly. Some parts of his body simply refused to calm down. His fingers flexed slightly, testing his grip, and his blush deepened as the cotton-covered curves gave a bit beneath his touch. Apparently the lopunny's claim about not having any clothes that fit extended to bras, or a lack thereof, and he couldn't help but wonder if her lack of proper-fitting clothes extended to panties as well. Bunnie gasped softly at the squeeze, her whole body shivering against him.

"Nf." Evan's fingers stilled again, but he kept his hands where they were. This was exactly as awkward as he'd feared it might be, but- well, she wasn't objecting. In fact, she was kind of encouraging it. Honestly, this hold was even flimsier than the one he'd had about her waist, since he was almost afraid to tighten his grip, but somehow he suspected that her suggested hand-positioning was based less on getting a secure hold and more on... something else entirely.

There was certainly no denying that this was a 'better' hold, though, at least in relative terms. If not for the throbbing ache in his right orb, it would almost be like a dream come true.

"R-... right," Evan mumbled, trying to keep himself on task. "So, uh, what do you...?"

Bunnie drew in a deep breath, a broad smile on her muzzle. She shifted some, pressing back against the eevee again as she considered her options. "We-ell, if you were taller I'd maybe try to jerk my head back and bop you on the nose again?"

"Good," Evan murmured, more at ease now that they were back on the subject of self defense. "The back of your head is harder than most noses, so that'll definitely stun someone. Ah, but since I'm shorter, what else?"

"Well," Bunnie pursed her lips, peeking downward. "I could kick you."

She shifted her stance before the eevee could object, her weight settled on her right foot as she lifted her left. Bending her leg at the knee, she pressed her bare heel to Evan's shin. "Like that?"

Evan cleared his throat, his voice wavering just slightly. "Ah, r-... right... but you should aim a little higher. For, uh... for the side of the knee, where the joint is weaker. Here, like-"

The eevee shifted slightly, his fingers brushing over the cotton of Bunnie's shirt as he helped her reposition herself slightly. Her foot bumped against the inside of his left leg now, and he folded the joint just the tiniest bit. "That, right. Like that. A good hit there, and almost anyone will fall. If you do it hard enough, they won't be able to get back up again."

Bunnie bobbed her head, her leg lowering again. That seemed straightforward enough.

"What else?" Evan prompted her.

That caught the lopunny off-guard, and she glanced back downward. She seemed to be getting better at this, though, and her gleeful grin made him nervous. Her right arm folded, then slid back as if to jab her elbow at his ribs.

"Oh," he murmured. "Not bad. But that's a distraction at most, unless you can hit them hard enough to-eeEEP!"

While the male had been talking, Bunnie had promptly unfolded her elbow, snapping her heavy right paw down in one smooth motion. Her palm slapped firmly against the front of the eevee's pants, her blunted nails gouging carefully against the denim.

"W-woah now!" Evan lilted, his voice spiking to near soprano. It wasn't pain in his voice, but it was certainly surprise.

Bunnie tittered softly, trying to stifle another giggle. Her fingers tensed, clawtips dragging against the rough denim beneath them, and she wrapped her fingers around the firm contours of the first thing she could find. "How 'bout this...?"

"Nn..." Evan wavered, his eyes lidding a bit. It was hard to feel much of anything through the fabric of his pants, but the lopunny's touch was just firm enough to make it... interesting. He panted slightly, his ears swaying forward as he tried not to moan. "W-... well that's... hh..."

The female persisted for a few seconds longer, her grin broadening, and then she suddenly shifted her grip. "Ohh, wait, that's... I meant to go a bit lower-" And her grip abruptly dipped a few more inches, abandoning the firm bulge she had been toying with in favor for the softer lumps beneath. Her fingers curled, nails digging in just enough to let her get a halfway decent grip on the tender little things, and she gave the slightest of squeezes.

She purred, smugly. "How about THIS?"

Evan uttered another squeak, this one beyond soprano. His ball still ached a little, and even that gentle squeeze was enough to send another sharp twinge through it. He gulped down a quick breath, his muzzle pressed lightly to the back of Bunnie's neck. "Mmmnf... y-... yeah, that'd... hf... I think... uh..."

Bunnie's head swayed to one side, her eyes half-closed as she moved her other arm up to the male's hands to better pin them against her chest. She shifted her grip with the other hand, working against the denim as she tried to knead and squeeze at the aching balls beneath. Her inexperience was blatantly obvious, but she seemed to be getting the hang of it with remarkable swiftness. Given another few seconds, she had managed to isolate the grape-sized ovals against her palm, firmly caught between two folds of denim.

"Mmn... and then I'd... squeeze?" She mused, thoughtfully. Her fingers twitched a bit, pinching at the orbs just slightly - although it was enough to set the canine to shivering at her back again. She grinned, her ears perked as she flicked her wrist a little. "Ooh, or I'd twist? I mean, if the fabric is loose enough. If the guy's nude, like he was flashing me or somethin', I bet I could twist'em right off!"

Evan panted harshly, his eyes closed to slits. He wasn't thrilled by the lopunny's odd fantasizing, but he could certainly appreciate the clumsy but soft stroke of her fingers. If there was anything that might soothe the ache in his bruised nut, it was that kind of gentle attention. "I-... hhf... I don't think... hh... that's..."

Bunnie pinched down just a tad harder, eliciting a pitched squeak from the breathless male. Her wrist flicked again, her grin steady. "Or maybe I'd just clamp down and pull! I used to milk cows back on the plantation, sometimes, so I've got a pretty good grip! Oooh, in fact, if I were turned around the other way I could get one in each hand and milk'em somethin' vicious!"

Evan coughed, his voice lilted desperately. This had just gone from arousing to more than a little scary, and that grip was getting just a tad too firm for his liking. "O-... okay, great, you figured out how to do the grab, twist, and pull all on your own! L-.... let's move on to something else!"

The lopunny stuck her tongue out, but obediently relinquished her grip on the male's pride. Her embarrassment was completely forgotten now, perhaps because the male was obviously on the defensive, or perhaps because she found herself in an unprecedented position of power. Regardless of the reason, she quickly resumed grinning. "Or I could do THIS!"

And her leg jerked back again, this time aiming significantly higher than the shin or the knee. She had been able to reach halfway up his leg before, and she was fairly certain she could reach even higher. Her left foot kicked back and up, her thighs bulging as her muscles flexed, her leg lifting until her broad and rounded heel thumped gently between Evan's legs.

She did it as softly as she could manage, but Evan's entire body still flinched at the impact. Unlike the last time her foot had been between his legs, it lingered there this time. He could practically feel her rolling his balls against his pelvis, and he was suddenly acutely aware of just how small those impossibly delicate glands were. Er, not to say that his balls were all THAT small, relatively speaking - they were certainly large enough to get the job done in the bedroom. But in comparison to the lopunny's hands they were small enough to fit both against her palm at once, and in comparison to her foot they felt downright tiny.

"Whattaya think?" Bunnie grinned. "Would that get both of'em?"

"I thi-" Evan's voice cracked, briefly spiking to soprano as if he were an awkward teenager all over again. The 'lust' and 'reason' sections of his brain had officially declared all-out war with each other. On the one hand he really didn't want to let go of the lopunny's chest, but on the other hand he really did want to get away from that teasing foot. He cleared his throat, his ears twitching a bit spastically, and tried again. "I, uh... yeah, I think so."

Bunnie wrinkled her nose, her head twitching to one side as she tried to get a better view of her positioning. It was almost impossible to see exactly where her foot was, given her position relative to Evan's, but she wriggled her ankle some as she pressed her heel more firmly to the male's crotch. "Hrn... 'think'? Damn, okay. Well maybe if I-"

"I mean you definitely would!" Evan squeaked, pushing up onto his own toes in an effort to avoid having the lagomorph's heel dig too hard against his delicates. "That would definitely, definitely put anybody in some serious pain!"

The lopunny cocked her jaw, still looking a bit doubtful, but something in the eevee's voice seemed to convince her. She grinned again, her eyes sparkling, and her leg dutifully dropped back away from Evan's groin. "Well, okay. Great!"

She shifted her weight from one foot to the other, an ear perked as all manner of ideas zipped through her brain. "What if I- OH!"

Bunnie's foot planted back against the ground, her heel inadvertently pressing to the toes of Evan's foot. She recoiled reflexively, promptly losing her balance, and lurched forward. Evan quickly redoubled his grip on the lapine in an effort to keep her upright, but given that she massed at almost half again what he did it was a pointless effort. Both 'mon tumbled gracelessly to the ground.

"Ungh," Bunnie grunted, her arms sprawling out against the rug before she could faceplant. Still, she was flat on her front, with the eevee sprawled against her back. Her fur had protected her from any significant rugburn, but having a full-grown 'mon land on- well, okay, a half-grown mon. Having a half-grown 'mon land on her had still knocked the wind from her lungs. "Ow. That was-"

And a pause, as her ears twitched bolt upright. "Uh, Evan?"

"Rrf," the male grunted in return. He was a bit disoriented as well, mostly from having his brain rattled about in his skull, but he recovered quickly. He was sprawled along the femme'mon's plush body, his muzzle planted between her shoulder blades and his hips against her rump. "Hn? You, mnf... you okay?"

Bunnie was silent for a few seconds, her ears reddening all the way from base to tip. It took her a few seconds to collect her thoughts, and then she finally murmured uncertainly. "Um... what's... uh... you're kind of... poking me?"

Evan shifted against the blushing bunny, his ears twitched forward curiously. "What? I don't- erk!" And his own, shorter ears reddened, his hips quickly jerking away from the lagomorph's well-padded rear. He moved to roll off of the lopunny entirely, but his arms were still wrapped about her torso - and the female quickly tightened her grip on his hands to keep him more or less in place.

Bunnie giggled, hard, as levity outweighed embarrassment. Her ears were still well-tinted, but it was fading fast, and she wriggled her own hips playfully to set her cottony tail flicking back and forth. "What was that, Evan?"

"Wuh," Evan coughed faintly, still blushing hard. Finding that he couldn't retreat, he instead braced his knees to either side of the lopunny's shapely legs, so that he could at least keep the bulge under his jeans from grinding awkwardly against Bunnie's buns. "Hff... ah... c-... cell phone? It was my cell phone!"

"Uh-huh." Bunnie giggled, entirely unconvinced.

"It is!" The eevee squeaked indignantly, his tone defiant and entirely unconvincing at the same time. "I-... I must have, uh... forgotten to take it out of my pocket before we... uh, before we started?"

The lopunny was silent for another few seconds, and then she shifted beneath the male. Rolling about carefully, she kept his arms around her as she slipped onto her back, until the two were settled nose-to-nose. Or, er, nose-to-forehead and nose-to-cleavage respectively. Evan was still a good bit shorter than the female. She smiled, playful but also uncertain. "So... you really DO think I'm hot, huh?"

"Um..." Evan blinked, his voice trailing off as he steadfastly trying not to stare into the female's heaving cleavage. He failed, of course, but he at least tried to make a token effort at it. His nose remained practically tucked down the front of Bunnie's shirt for a long, long moment.

Bunnie's head twitched lightly to one side as she watched the flabbergasted male, more than a little intrigued by his reaction. She'd spotted him peeking at her chest or her legs every so often, but the naive part of her had assumed he was just gauging her posture or maybe judging her for her poor wardrobe, but... this seemed to imply otherwise. She drew in a slow, deep breath to puff out her chest, then just as quickly exhaled as she couldn't help but laugh at the eevee's steadily widening eyes.

"So that's a yes, then?" She snickered, once she'd managed to stop giggling uncontrollably. One hand slid between herself and the male, a finger setting firmly below his jaw to tug his muzzle upward until she could look him in the eye. "Hey, I'm up here!"

"Oh!" Evan started, as if he'd just been woken up. "Ah-... I... s-... sorry, I just... uh... I guess I must be... getting... tired? It's been a long day, and I kind of... erm... zoned out?"

Bunnie fluttered her lashes, her tone a bit barbed and her smile more than a little teasing as she curled her own arms about the male's shoulders. "Re-e-eally?"

Evan opened his muzzle as if to quickly respond, but he evidently thought better of whatever lame excuse he was about to spout. His own ears twitched forward, a guilty grin slicing across his features as he set his muzzle against the lopunny's own. "Well... no, I, uh, guess not. The truth is, you're incredibly attractive- I, ah, mentioned that before, didn't I?"

Bunnie bobbed her head, her eyes shining. "You did."

"And," Evan exhaled softly, his breath warm against the lopunny's chin. "And we've been... very close, for the past hour or so..."

Bunnie practically purred, one arm staying at the male's shoulders while her other hand slid downward along his back to pull him closer. "We have."

Evan smiled, eagerly pressing more firmly to the lopunny's form as she made it clear that she didn't mind. It was a little awkward, as her generous bust pressed against his neck and shoulders, but... really... he was more than happy to accept a little awkwardness at this point if it meant getting close to the femme'mon. "And... ah... I'm... I might be a little... turned on?"

The lopunny wriggled her nose, her whiskers framing her smile. Her hand slid farther along the eevee's spine, then past his wagging tail and toned rump. Curling between his spead thighs, she slipped her palm over the warm bulge of his balls and pressed her fingers to the much firmer bulge just past them. "Really?" She giggled, pinching lightly at the base of that barely restrained erection. "No way."

"Ahn!" Evan shivered hard, his eyes half-closed as he resisted the urge to plunge his muzzle back into Bunnie's cleavage. A split second of thought led him to reconsider that, though, and he went ahead and bowed his head. His nose pressed past the well-stretched shirt collar and right between those fuzzy mounds as he gasped. "C-... careful with... nnnh..."

Bunnie drew in a slow, shuddering breath as she toyed her fingers clumsily along that length. It was pinned flat against the eevee's front, beneath the unyielding denim, almost exactly in line with the zipper. Her whiskers twitched again, her own muzzle dipped some as she nuzzled the top of the male's head - right between his ears - and then she slid her lower-placed paw about to the male's front to gingerly catch the pull tab between two fingers. With a slow but firm tug, she steadily slid the male's jeans open until-

"Oh!" She squeaked, surprised as the eevee's cock almost immediately burst through the zipper as it came undone. It wasn't huge - not like the ones she'd seen in a few of the porn videos she'd 'borrowed' from her sister on occasion - but it was... well, it was real. It was firm and thick, if a bit shorter than she expected, but given the eevee's own shorter stature that was hardly surprising. Her paw quickly curled about the exposed bit of meat, the warm flesh practically pulsing beneath her fingerpads.

"Mmnn... it's so warm...!" And a sly grin, her eyes half-closed as she giggled softly. "No underwear?"

"Ahhhn..." Evan moaned lustily now, his hips twitching just slightly as he felt those soft fingers wrapping about his manhood. "Ah... n-... no, I'm... nf... b-... boxers..."

Bunnie giggled, her fingertips playing up along the male's length before she slipped them in past the opened zipper. She could feel it now, the bunched fabric of his boxers where his cock had pushed right through the opening in the front. She traced about the base of his cock, teasing the tufted fur that almost seemed to create a little secondary mane at his crotch, and she murmured happily. "Oooh, kinky."

"Hhhh..." Evan shivered again, his eyes closed to slits as he panted against the lopunny's chest. "N-... not the word I would've... hf... used."

The lopunny was silent for another moment as she gingerly explored over the male's crotch through that opening in his pants, her wrist bumping and stroking against his erection as her fingers delved deeper. She brushed through his pubic fur, then lower to where she could feel the warm and surprisingly soft flesh at the very top of his sac. Her tongue played against her lips, the bridge of her muzzle wrinkling up studiously as she blindly slipped her fingers deeper - and curled them about the first firm little lump she could find.

"Ah-" Evan swallowed now, one ear twitching a few times in rapid succession like a wounded bird. He didn't move to stop the female, but his muzzle worked a few times as he tried to gasp out another breathless warning. "C-... careful! Nnh... th-... that one... that one still aches..."

"Awww," Bunnie crooned, her tone thick with exaggerated sympathy. "Don't worry, Ev. I'll be... mnn... careful..."

She tried to work just a bit more cautiously - not by much, but a little - and she gently scooped the male's orb from his pants just below the eevee's cock. Her fingers quickly pressed back in, probing about, and after a few more seconds she had found his other orb as well. She coaxed that one out more easily, until the canine's entire sac was hanging loosely in the cool air - and she was quick to warm it as she cupped her palm against those orbs with eager curiosity.

"Ohh," She murmured, fascinated. Her fingers probed and pinched lightly over the male's curiously soft and spongy sac, rolling his balls against her palm as she tried to get a good feel for them. "They're so... they're small! And... and they're kind of soft, but... but still firm, too...!"

"Rrnf," Evan grunted, his ear twitching again. He tried his damndest to sound a little irritated, but for some odd reason he was having a really hard time actually feeling annoyed. It probably had something to do with that lovely paw that was stroking and kneading against his genitals. "N-... not THAT small! Th-... they're average, for someone my size!"

Bunnie giggled, delicately shifting her grip until she had one of those orbs captured between her finger and thumb. It really was about the size of a grape or a berry, and not too far off from feeling like one, too. She pinched delicately, eliciting a soft squeak from the male, and she quickly relented. Yes, it definitely felt a bit like a warm berry - there had even been a slight give from the pressure she had exerted.

A slow smile spread across her muzzle again, growing steadily wider by the second, until the lopunny abruptly slipped her free hand upward to tuck against the back of Evan's head. Her lower hand shifted as well, releasing the one captive 'nad and instead gathering both of them against her palm, and she closed her fist carefully around them.

She paused, making quite certain that the male's muzzle was firmly entrenched - pinned now, really - between her breasts. Once she seemed satisfied that he was too distracted to object, she rolled her wrist to carefully twist the male's sac. It was surprisingly pliant, relatively speaking, and she rolled the canine's pouch halfway about as she tested the give.

Evan uttered a soft groan, well-muffled by the lopunny's generous bust, but he didn't try to squirm free. It actually felt rather pleasant, especially given how carefully the femme'mon was going about it.

Bunnie pursed her lips a bit, rolling her wrist the other way as she similarly twisted the canine's sac halfway about in the other direction. Her fingers twitched some, as if she were tempted to twist even further, but thankfully - for the male at least - she seemed to resist the urge. Her forefinger and thumb curled a bit tighter at the top of his sac, gently sliding Evan's twins to the bottom of the fleshy pouch, and she secured her hold on them there before tugging gently.

"Ah-!" Evan gasped, his ears bolt upright.

Bunnie pretended not to hear him, adjusting her grip again to better hold the eevee's balls in her grip. They were surprisingly slippery, and seemed eager to squirt right out of her paw when she played too roughly with them. Once she was content that they couldn't escape, she tugged a little harder to test the 'give'. The male's scrotum didn't exactly resist her pulling, stretching easily, but it was obvious that his balls were rooted to something - and a quick bit of probing quickly let her trace along the fibrous cord that ran from one testicle and back up into the male's body.

Evan's head jerked a bit, as if he were trying to pull his muzzle up from the female's cleavage, and the lopunny redoubled her hold at the back of his head.

Licking her lips again, Bunnie furrowed her brow as she rolled the captive berries against her palm. Her fingers uncurled, then slipped back about as she tried capturing the neck of the eevee's scrotum between her first and second finger instead. It felt like a more secure hold, her fingers clamping together to keep the male's balls securely pinned against her fingers with nowhere to escape to. She gave it a few quick seconds of thought, then tugged again - even harder than the first two times, accompanied with the slightest flick of her wrist and a less than gentle squeeze.

"Nnnhk!" Muffled or not, this time the male's pained whine was obvious. He spasmed some, his ears slicked back against his head as his muzzle worked against the lopunny's sternum. He writhed, his thighs trying to close protectively about his jewels - but it didn't help any. His knees were still planted to either side of the bunny's hips, and even if he COULD close his legs together, his balls were hanging outside of his pants with a paw firmly wrapped around them.

"Mmnf!" He mumbled, louder, his muzzle a bit wet against the fur of Bunnie's chest. "Mmn-mmf!"

Bunnie sniffed faintly, then reluctantly eased her hold on the back of the eevee's head. "What's wrong, hun?"

Evan panted a bit harshly, an ear twitching as he winced. "K-... kind of... nf... kind of scrambling my eggs a little, Bunnie. Hf... m-... making it a little... ng... hard..."

Bunnie grinned, smugly, entirely unrepentant as she bumped her wrist against the male's still rigid cock. "No kidding! Seems plenty hard, to me!"

"N-... not what I meant!" Evan gasped, his eyes a little crossed at the firm bump against the underside of his length. "I-... hf... I mean-"

"What?" Bunnie giggled, her fingers tensing again as she squeezed the captive orbs just enough to squash them a little out of shape. Evan's eyes crossed even farther, his balls practically throbbing against the lopunny's fingers in time with the canine's heartbeat. "Then-?"

The male's erection twitched hard, a few droplets of pre spurting against the female's bared midsection. He hardly seemed to notice, though, instead groaning breathlessly as he writhed against the lopunny's body. "Ngh... h-... hurts! Bunnie, e-... ease up!"

"Oh, fine." Bunnie pouted, her fingers loosening. She promptly abandoned the lightly bruised and sharply aching orbs, her fingers brushing upward along the underside of the eevee's cock instead. It twitched again at her touch, another few drops of pre wetting her fingertips.

She quirked a brow, her hand slipping up as she peeked at it. The droplets were clear and sticky, beaded against her furred fingers. She sniffed experimentally at it, both brows arched, and then she lewdly swept her pink tongue across her fingertips to clean them. "Mmmn..."

Evan twitched a bit more, his muzzle hanging open. Really, he wanted to chastise the lopunny for being a little too rough - but after watching that, he really couldn't remember why. In fact, he was having an awfully hard time thinking about anything, beyond how sharp the ache in his balls was. It wasn't just pain, but also a rapidly increasing tenderness that was unique to those suffering from very blue balls.

He worked his muzzle again, trying to say something, and only a wavering whine came out. It was adorable and almost pitiably desperate. "Hnnhhg?"

Bunnie uttered a soft, satisfied sigh as she rolled the male's taste against her tongue, then visibly swallowed. Peeking back down at him, she quickly darted her hand toward Evan's crotch to curl it back about the male's length. Her voice breathy, she rumbled near one of his ears. "My room is right over there. Do you want to...?"

Evan's eyes widened, and his head bobbed in a nod so quickly that his chin slapped against the upper swell of the lopunny's breasts.

"Then let's..." Bunnie seemed eager at first, but then hesitated as something else seemed to occur to her. "Well, first we should-"

The eevee groaned again, his ears twitching back at the female's sudden hesitance. He tried to imagine what her objection might entail, his mind snapping onto the first likely possibility. "I've got, nf... condoms in my wallet!"

"Huh?" Bunnie blinked, and then she batted lightly at the male's muzzle as she snickered. "No! I mean, it's not like you can get me pregnant anyway, but... uh... good to know?"

"Then what?" Evan whined.

"I just-" Bunnie paused, then grinned as she set her hands out to her sides. "One more lesson. This, uh... our position reminded me of one more situation I might, like, find myself in. Put your hands on my wrists...?"

Evan blinked, but reluctantly shifted to follow the female's instructions. He rocked against her, blushing as the tip of his still unfettered length briefly pressed to the soft cotton of her gym shorts, and then he rebalanced his weight against his knees. His hands slipped out to either side, planting against the lagomorph's forearms as if he were pinning her down. "Er, like this? And, uh... wait, should I, um... tuck myself back in?"

"No," the lopunny crooned. "If a guy were, like, trying to rape me... he'd... he'd be hangin' out like that, right?"

"Oh!" Evan squeaked a little, glancing downward at his crotch, then to either side at his hands. This scenario actually made him more than a little uncomfortable. Not so much because he was worried about how the lopunny might fight back, but rather because he hated to envision himself as someone who would force himself on a woman. "I-, uh... I guess, but..."

Bunnie's grin held steady, her body wriggling beneath the canine's as she peeked downward as well. "So, if I'm in THIS position, and the guy's got his-"

She paused, her gaze fixed on the eevee's exposed genitals for a long few seconds.

"Er," Evan twitched his ears forward. "Bunnie?"

The lopunny started some as she heard her name, and she blushed lightly as she wriggled a bit more. "Uh, sorry. I've, um... I've just never seen a real... um... I mean, nevermind." And huffed faintly, trying to will away her embarrassment, and then she managed a coy smile. "So I would just, uh, lift my leg like-"

She slid her left leg upward, her thick thigh bumping lightly against the crotch of the male's jeans, his loose-hanging gonads bouncing lightly at the soft impact. "That?"

Evan grunted softly, but managed a quick smile. Going for the groin again? He was still a little perturbed by the lopunny's newfound fascination with exploring ways to emasculate would-be attackers, but this WAS the last lesson. And, er, then she'd hopefully be going for his groin in an entirely different sense of the word.

He drew in a steady breath, and bobbed his head a bit. There was no reason not to humor her for a few moments longer, and then they could both focus on something ELSE for a while. "Mmn, well, that might hurt a bit. But, uh, your thigh is pretty soft. At best it'll distract a guy, and maybe get him to try to jerk away defensively - uh, like this."

The eevee slid his hips back, away from the bunny's uplifted leg, and he tried to ignore the odd sensation that accompanied the feel of his dangling nuggets sliding along the length of the lopunny's furred thigh. Once he'd slid back far enough, he could almost feel his balls bounce off the slightly raised ridge of her kneecap, and he murmured again. "And, nf... there. Once they're about this far, you want to use your kneecap. It's hard bone, and at that angle you would drive, rf... uh, you would drive a guy's 'nads right into his pelvis."

"Ooooh," Bunnie crooned, eagerly lifting her leg a little more until the rounded curve of her knee was physically lifting the male's berries a bit. "So, like, between bone and bone? That sounds... that sounds like it'd be pretty painful."

Evan twitched a bit - first his cock, and then his ear - and his throat seemed to run a little dry. "It, uh... it really is."

Bunnie pursed her lips, her brows arched. "How do-?"

Evan snorted, a wry grin on his muzzle. "I mentioned that your sister is a bitch, right?"

The lopunny was silent for a brief second, and then she giggled hard. Her leg slid back down, smoothly, and she shook her head a bit as she tried to recover her breath. "So she-!?"

Even rolled his eyes, leaning in to lick across the lopunny's nose. "No comment. So, uh, your bedroom?"

"One sec, hun." Bunnie smirked, evidently tickled by the male's eager tone. She glanced downward, gauging the distance between her knee and the eevee's exposed balls. Evan had lowered himself again, too close for a proper knee, but she could fix that easily enough. She murmured thoughtfully. "Just need to practice one more swing, to make sure I've got it right. Um..."

And a pause, as she stifled another giggle. "Evan, do you think you can do another 'tough guy' voice? Like, uh...?"

Evan rolled his eyes, but nodded. He spent a split second thinking, then curled his lip in a mock growl. "Give it up, lady! Just lie back and take it, and I won't hurt ya-!"

"But I'll hurt YOU!" Bunnie giggled defiantly, her leg surging upward to plant her bare thigh firmly against the male's crotch. She didn't hold back much, this time, perhaps remembering what Evan had said about a thigh strike 'not really hurting'.

Evan, of course, instantly regretted that reassurance. The lopunny's broad thigh slapped painfully against his sac, bouncing his rubbery berries upward to slap against his rigid length in turn, and he reflexively jerked his hips backward. The impact hadn't really been devastating, but it had still been rather painful, and a sharp ache was already rapidly saturating his nuggets and racing back into his gut.

"Ah-hah!" Bunnie crowed, as she spied her opening. Her leg flicked back downward smoothly, and her other leg bent at the knee as she jerked it upward-

The door burst open, and Bonnie strode in. She was clad in rumpled sweats that practically hung off of her slim frame, and she sighed happily as she strode into her apartment. "Bunnie, I'm home! Did the runt ever-?"

Evan squeaked, his pain very briefly forgotten as his ears shot bolt upright. "Bonnie!"

And the elder lopunny's eyes swiftly narrowed as she took in the scene - the male with his cock out, her younger sister's arms pinned to the ground as he straddled over her. Her lip curled, her duffel bag dropping heavily to the ground as she curled her hands into fists. "EVAN!?"

And Bunnie squeaked as well, her eyes wide. Maybe she had intended to pull her swing, or maybe she hadn't. All that mattered in the end was that, so surprised was she, that she didn't temper her upward swinging leg even the tiniest bit. If anything, her surprise made the motion even swifter, and her unyielding kneecap caught the startled eevee's nutsac in one smooth motion before crushing it firmly and mercilessly against the front of his pelvis.

"Guh-" Evan gasped, his lungs suddenly empty as his hips bounced and his knees left the ground. His eyes were already watering before he'd even managed to find the floor again, and his body went boneless as he almost immediately seemed ready to collapse atop the busty Bunnie beneath him.

"Evan!" Bunnie squeaked, panicked. "No! I didn't-"

"Off her, you son of a bitch!" Bonnie scowled, launching herself forward in six quick steps that took her clear across the room. She smoothly swung around the two entangled 'mon as she picked her target - the same one that her sister had just lashed out at - and her leg flashed forward like lightning. Just as Bunnie's leg jerked back downward, clearing the path to the eevee's balls, the toe of Bonnie's sneaker filled the gap.

"Oh-" The male managed to whine, horror and resignation in his eyes as he spied that sneaker-clad footpaw slicing through the air between his thighs. "Sh-"

CRNCH! His balls were firmly reintroduced to the front of his pelvis, this time pinned squarely between his body and the firm rubber of the elder lopunny's shoe. It hit even harder than Bunnie had managed, and this time the eevee's lower body bounced so far off the ground that he practically flipped right off of the younger lopunny before landing flat on his back three feet away.

"Aw-!" Evan's voice lilted into a howl, instantly obeying his brain's urgent demands to curl into the fetal position. His muscles spasmed, his body jackknifing forward as he tried to roll onto his side, but Bonnie beat him to the punch.

"I can't believe I trusted you!" Bonnie snarled, scooping up the stricken male's legs with an ankle in each hand. She jerked them upward and outward, keeping the canine on his back with his legs spread wide, and the sole of her sneaker pressed roughly down against his crotch - his rigid cock and aching balls both. "Hope you enjoyed having nuts while you had the chance, asshole!"

"B- Bonnie!" Bunnie managed to shriek, her surprise finally wearing enough to let her paralyzed muscles act. "Wait!"

"I've got this," Bonnie hissed, her ankle twisting as she bore down against the spasming canine's crotch. His length was pinned firmly between the toe of her shoe and his abdomen, while his balls were rolling and squashing even more firmly beneath her rubber heel. "Just get the phone, and call the police!"

The younger lopunny hesitated for a split second, then steeled herself before launching forward to tackle her sibling! Her older sister barely managed a surprised squeal before both of the lopunny's were sent reeling across the room, unceremoniously crashing into the couch.

"Bunnie!" The elder lopunny growled, squirming against her shorter but heavier sibling. "What the HELL!?"

Bunnie squeaked as her sister quickly gained the advantage. Bunnie had certainly had surprise on her side, but her sibling had experience and stronger muscles. She grunted as she was shoved back against the couch, an elbow planted to her collarbone to keep her pinned. Still, she managed to gasp out, "Don't hurt him!"

That gave Bonnie pause. Her ears twitched, her brow furrowed. "What? Wait, why not? The fucker was trying to RAPE you!?"

"Noooo," Bunnie groaned, and she was suddenly stricken by the absurdity of the situation. She blushed hard, her body going limp beneath her sister's pinning arm. "No no no! He was helping me!"

Bonnie's rage vanished, replaced by a neutral expression. "What."

"He... I mean, uh... we-" Bunnie blushed harder, her fingertips tapping together nervously. "He was teaching me how to do self defense. Like, um... and I insisted that he show me, uh, what to do if, like... uh... if a rapist..."

Bonnie stared at her younger sister for another long moment, then finally leaned back as her eyes rolled with exasperation. "Arceus. Well you could'a just SAID so!"

"You didn't give me a chance!" Bunnie squeaked, swiftly sitting back up. "And-... and, uh..."

Her voice faded, her eyes rolling sidelong as she suddenly remembered the male. He was still on the ground, his hands cupping his groin and his legs twitching weakly. He was barely moving, and utterly silent beyond the pitched and repetitive utterance he was whimpering.

"My balls! M-... my balls...! Oh, Arceus, my... balls...!"

"Uh," Both lopunnies snapped their gaze to the door, still open from when Bonnie had come bursting in. A zubat stood there, clad in loose pajamas and a nightcap pulled so low that it went halfway down her face. "Not tryin' to be a jerk here, but can you guys totally keep it down? I mean seriously, it's four in the afternoon and-"

The zubat paused, both long ears twitching about to orient on the soprano eevee that was twitching and squirming against the ground. One hand came up, tugging at her nightcap as if to give her a better look - although it only exposed the fabric of her sleeping mask. "Er... what's wrong with-?"

Bonnie crossed the room in a flash and swiftly slammed the door in the zubat's face.

The elder lopunny sighed, snapping the lock shut with one paw, and slapping her forehead with the other. "Okay, uh... get him onto the couch-"

"My bed is bigger." Bunnie volunteered innocently.

"Fine," Bonnie snorted. "Get the runt onto your bed, and I'll go get some ice. I've, uh, got the number for one of the nurses who works at the gym. She'll make sure he's still, erm..."

She paused again, her eyes rolling downward to peek at the squeaking eevee's groin. His fingers were laced protectively over his balls, but even the slim bits of puffy flesh visible made it obvious that his sac was badly bruised and rapidly swelling. The male was barely conscious, but honestly - given the amount of pain that must have been surging through his nethers, that was probably a small mercy. "That, uh, he's still an 'Evan' and not an 'Eve'."

Bunnie winced, then bobbed her head as she darted over to scoop the eevee up. She groaned as she strained against his weight - he was shorter and lighter than her, but that still didn't mean it was easy to lift his bulk. But she managed, and then dragged the whimpering 'mon toward her bedroom.

She sighed. Ah well, at least she was still getting him in bed, right? That had to be worth SOMEthing.

And hell, at least know she knew what REALLY happened when a guy took a swift kick to the 'nads. Somehow, that really did seem to help.

***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****

"Right," Bonnie nodded as she walked the audino nurse back toward the front door. "Seriously, Dina, thanks a lot."

Dina smiled, her hands absently smoothing her rumpled nurses blouse. "It's fine, Bon, seriously. But, um, let's try not to make this a habit, okay? I don't think Evan will survive getting his testicles pounded into his ribcage on a regular basis."

"Er," Bonnie coughed lightly, ushering the audino the rest of the way back out into the hall. "Yeah yeah, just, uh... it was a complete accident..."

And a pause, before she murmured under her breath. "... this time."

Dina smirked, one brow quirked as she eyed the lopunny skeptically. "Uh-huh. I might believe that, if you didn't nut the guys who spar against you on a regular-"

"Goodbye, Dina!" Bonnie huffed, and the door slammed shut.

She turned, one hand rubbing against her forehead as she stifled a sigh. The elder lopunny paused, though, as she spied her younger sister standing near her bedroom door.

Bunnie looked genuinely worried, her hands clasped tightly together. "So he's-?"

"Uh-" Bonnie quickly collected her thoughts, then fired off a disarming grin as she casually rolled her shoulders. "Yeah, the runt's gonna be fine. Might walk funny for a couple of weeks, and fire blanks for a few days, but Dina says he's still basically, um... intact."

"Oh," Bunnie murmured quietly. She fidgeted some, peering back over her shoulder to where the eevee was sleeping now, a hefty bag of ice wedged between his wide-spread thighs. He'd squeaked and groaned inarticulately through most of the medical exam, but finally he'd passed out when Dina had 'palpated' the injured region - which apparently involved repeatedly squeezing the male's balls. "But, um... the sounds he was making! And, um... he seemed so... uh..."

Bonnie snorted, her crooked grin genuine as she drifted over to join her sister in peering at the temporarily emasculated male. "Yeah, well, that's usually how a guy reacts when you give him a good, hard punt. If a guy doesn't go soprano after a swift kick in the 'nads, then he's probably not really a guy. Or, y'know, maybe a steel-type."

The younger lopunny mulled on that for a second, her ears twitching back and forth silently.

"You might say," Bonnie smirked. "That a kick in the 'nads is usually super effective."

Bunnie snerked, smiling a bit despite her concern. "I gathered. I barely touched'em, and Evan went cross-eyed!"

Bonnie's smirk widened, one hand rising to her muzzle as she bit back a laugh. "Don't sell yerself short, sis. I came in right toward the end there, but, uh, you clocked him pretty solid. Good technique, solid hit. Even if I hadn't piled on, he'd still be singin' soprano for at least a few days."

"Well I didn't-" Bunnie started, but then she promptly slid off-track. "Wait, really?" And a grin, as she peeked back toward her sibling. "You think so?"

The elder lopunny chuckled, giving her younger sister a slap on the shoulder. "I know so. I've cracked the guy's nuts often enough to know what his thresholds are. He's ranked, like, twentieth at the Fighting Dojo. Real lightweight. One good knee is usually more'n enough to have him crying uncle."

"Oh," Bunnie mused thoughtfully. "And, um... would most guys?"

Bonnie waved her hand dismissively. "Sure, unless they're a real hardcase or they're wearin', like, armor or somethin'. Course, that's why you don't stop at just one knee. Long as they're close enough, you keep pumping more knees in there. That way either the guy gives up first, or his balls do. And trust me, once a guys balls are done for, so is he."

"Oh." Bunnie murmured again, her ears perked a bit as she peered back toward Evan again. But then she drooped some, her shoulders slumped. "But... wait, now Evan's gonna hate me..."

Bonnie exhaled sharply, uttering an unpleasant snorting sound. "So what? Guy's a dork. I only sent him over here 'cuz he was the softest, most pathetic looking dude I could find."

"No he's not!" Bunnie objected, her muzzle scrunched up defiantly. "He's great! And-... and I think I like him! But, um... but now he's gonna hate me forever, and... and..."

The elder lopunny curled her lip a bit, ready to spit out a harsh retort, but then she stopped herself. She sighed, her eyes rolling heavily. "Arceus, you're such a-... well... look, you want him to forgive you? Just, like..."

Bonnie lifted one arm, her forefinger and thumb curled into a circle before she jerked her paw up and down a few times. "Handjob. Give the poor sap a handjob, and he'll forgive anything."

"Really?" Bunnie frowned, unconvinced. "That's all it takes?"

Bonnie rolled her eyes again, her grin more than a little lewd. "Trust me, sis. Works every time. I mean, I guess if you actually break somethin' or need a really big favor then you might hafta go topless and, like, suck him off or whatever, but a handjob usually works just fine."

The younger lopunny let that sink in, and her eyes widened a bit. "Wait, does that mean that you and Evan-?"

"Uh," Bonnie hastily cut back in, her eyes rolling to one side as she averted her gaze. She wasn't exactly embarrassed, but she was certainly evasive. It was a bit unusual for her, given her normally blunt approach to pretty much everything. "No comment."

Bunnie said nothing, her muzzle splitting as her grin slowly widened until it almost ran from ear to ear.

Bonnie glanced back toward her, her own muzzle worked into a scowl. "Oh for- Fine! Fucking Arceus, why the hell d'you think he came over here all those times? Not like I can just do that shit in the locker room or something without gettin' caught."

The younger lopunny giggled sharply, but she didn't press the matter. Instead, she cocked her head and peeked back toward the unconscious male. "Hey, uh... sis? How long d'you think it'll be before he wakes back up...?"

"Huh?" Bonnie quirked an ear, following her sibling's gaze. "Oh, him? I dunno, maybe six or eight hours? Dude got his nuts stomped pretty hard. Honestly, I'm kind'a surprised he didn't throw up all over our-"

"Ew!" Bunnie winced, her ears slicked back. She quickly waved her hands as if to swat away her cruder sibling's words, and Bonnie took the hint.

Bonnie rolled her eyes, then shrugged. "Why?"

Bunnie bounced a little, grinning again. "'Cuz I'm gonna go out to buy some new clothes, and I wanna get back before he wakes up. I really need to get some things that fit." And she briefly stuck her tongue out, her hands sliding to her chest. "'Specially some new bras, 'cuz bouncing around with these things is killing me."

"Ah," Bonnie gestured dismissively. "You'll get used to it. Lopunny genes make for a sturdy spine 'nd strong back muscles. I mean, you're more stacked than me, but I got used to my girls pretty qui- wait." Her eyes widened, her ears flicking forward. "You're actually going out? You!?"

Bunnie gave a little shrug, her grin steady. "Yeah, why not? I mean, like, if worse comes to worse I can just kick someone in the 'nads and run, right?"

The elder lopunny blinked incredulously, but then nodded. "Uh, yeah. I, uh... I guess so."

And she glanced toward the eevee again, one ear slanted forward. "Whattaya know? The little twerp actually did it. Guess that means I owe him a blow-"

"Hm?" Bunnie perked her ears, pressing up onto her toes as she leeeeeaned toward her sister. "What was that?"

"Nothing!" Bonnie scowled, thwapping her younger sister on the muzzle. "If yer gonna go, then go! Sheesh. I've got, like, a hundred pokebucks in my duffel. Should be enough to get you a couple'a new outfits."

Bunnie bounced gleefully, and quickly followed her sister over to the aforementioned duffel bag. She held out one hand, accepting the bills that were thrust against her palm. "Thanks, Bon!"

"Yeah yeah, whatever." Bonnie scowled. She paused, though, an ear perking before she looked back into her bag. Fishing around, she came up with a brochure. "Oh, uh... and you might wanna take a look at this while you're out and about."

She held the brochure out, and Bunnie reluctantly accepted it.

"I wasn't gonna, uh-" Bonnie shrugged again, gesturing vaguely with one furred hand. "I mean, I didn't really think you'd be good for, like, league combat or anything, but after what I just saw I think you might at least wanna check this one out."

"Now," the elder lopunny grunted, flicking the door open and shoving her sister out into the hall. "Go!"

And the door clicked shut again, the lock snapping audibly back into place.

Bunnie's brow furrowed, her head lowered as she studied the pamphlet in her hands. Unlike most brochures, its cover was deceptively simple - a black inked outline of two stemmed cherries set against a lot of white space. She flipped it open to the first page, her head cocking curiously.

"What the heck is the Underground League?"