FSE

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Chapter 1

"CHRIS!"

A quiet moment passed, and foolishly I thought it would last.

"CHRIS GOD DAMN IT!"

The lion was making his way into his room yanking the curtains open. Realising that the fox did not want to be yelled at first thing in the morning Dan used a more appropriate, peaceful, tone.

"I called you ten minutes ago, why are you still in bed?" He said as I started stretching my arms out catching on to what's happening.

"I don't feel very we-" I tried to mumble as I got cut off.

"NO. Chris don't even try that, you know your in trouble with him so get up and go, you can't just avoid your problems." Dan said leaving promptly.

It was much less of my problem rather than Mr Digby's. I taught not even questioning how Dan found out. I sat up and was still for a second. Dan _was_right, but part of him just wanted to stay at home and let his problems fester.

Still not fully awake I started brushing my red fur coat. Unlike most of my species I have short fuzzy fur, the softest of which is on my light red cheek fur that follows a thin white patch down to my belly with some darker highlights. The pattern is repeated along my long bushy tail with more dark highlights. Apart from that, I am a little fox, its not that I have a small build I am just below average height.Surprisingly I have very short fur, apart from my tail which is_,_my most prized possession, and my biggest pride. Luckily having short fur, bar my tail, it is easy to brush and still looks fluffy.

Just as I finished, the smell of fried bacon made its siege in to my nose waking me fully. As I made my way down the stairs to find Dan making his famous fry up in the kitchen. He normally only made this when I had done something good, which I definitively haven't.

"What's with the fry up?" I questioned quizzically.

"Can't I make something nice every so often for my little pooch?" He said with a barley audible chuckle.

Now I'm certain he's hiding something! I thought.

Standing poised in the door entrance I questioned further.

"What did I do?" I spat out trying to recalling last weeks events.

"You don't remember what you did on Friday?" he replied in a calm tone.

Crap! That's what I did. It wasn't that bad, just a table thrown over in one of my classes. All I remember is having an argument with a teacher and him having a massive go at me. Him mentioning my problem, then me snapping. Now it all made sense. I turned my head ready to leave in dismay, his dark golden paw held my shoulder firmly as I was about to leave.

"Chris, I'm not going to argue with you." he spoke calmly "If you think that you can avoid consequences after that happening _twice,_in a week then you are dearly mistaken."

Pausing for a second to think I looked down at my feet paws sheepishly.

"I-It wasn't my fault" I grumbled. "I just... lost control." I sighed knowing what I had no input in this matter now .

"Come sit down and eat we will talk about that later." he said mysteriously.

Having no say in the matter I sat down, kept my head down and ate my breakfast in silence until.

"Heh, you complain that I am not your parent-."

"-because your not" I interjected with a mouth full of sweet, sweet bacon, almost like it was a reflex.

"No, your right" He said calmly "I am your guardian, ever since you had to leave your parents because they couldn't... control you." He paused waiting for a possible reaction. "But I look out for you and I help you clean up the mistakes you make, so just remember, all I do is to help you out" he continued. But then stopped, normally this would have been a good ten minute speech but he did not say another word.

"That's all? No long irritating speech?" I replied with surprise.

"Nope, glad to know you find them irritating" The lion said comically.

Seeing no further reason to stay I garbed my stuff and dashed out. He has got to be hiding something more, this week had been more of a mess than normal and I feel like the whole world is crumbling around me. most of the time I can't "Control myself", but of course if you mention your problem to people who aren't willing to listen and believe you it just becomes another of your infamous excuses. If you ask someone for help, it's just inviting them to give an unwelcome speech.

I guess this might not be too bad. I thought clicking the door shut behind me only to hear it open again. Ignoring this I trekked on, wondering what else is in store for myself today.

"Come here, Chris" I herd in a familiar stern voice.

As I turned I gave Dan a puzzled look wondering what this will be about, as I considered making a run for it knowing very well that he was ready to catch me and he was fully capable of doing so, it would only make matters worse.

"Turn around and close your eyes." He commanded, in a surprisingly soft voice interrupting my train of thought.

_Am I not in trouble? What's going on? _Not wanting to start a public affair,I did what I was told slowly. As the bulky collar was locked over my neck things were suddenly clear. I let out a low pitched moan as I prepared to spin around and get mad at Dan- when surprisingly he leaned in close and hugged me from behind, which easily caught me off guard.

"Yea, yea, you don't like it but you know you have to, hell, you should have last time but I let that one slip didn't I ?", "you understand that, right?" His voice changing into a much sincere one as his words slid out of his mouth. Not wanting to start sobbing now I just nodded keeping my head down as I toyed with the stupid contraption. I could make out some circular cold metal plates on the underside of the dark red collar, I have a good idea as to what these were for.

"you know if it wasn't for that... thing. They would have already taken you way from me Chris. So don't you dare even think about tampering, or trying to get that thing off. Clear?" He said sternly.

I nodded to him avoiding eye contact as I could not hold back tears any more. All this now I have to put up with looking like an uncontrollable feral.

"Say it."

"Y-yes Dan." I stammered burying myself into his thick chest fur, I was nuzzling his large chest as finally a little cry made its way out of my maw.

"Right, now forget about that, now go get your little furry but to school and come straight home after there is going to be somebody coming over to meet you." He exclaimed as he gave me a small encouraging push to go as he went back inside.He must be busy, like always.

The way to school was plain and dull I spent most of the time wandering why more "shrinks" were coming over and how this stupid device functioned. It was obviously an electric collar, I had seen one or two back in the mental unit, but weather it was remote controlled or somehow got set off, I would probably find out the hard way.

All the psychiatrists that have 'paid me a visit' you'd think after seven or eight times they would realise there is nothing they can do to help. Many have tried do diagnose me with one thing or another, or try to find a solution but in the end it all came back in my face in the same way something like this;

"You don't understand YOU are the problem, YOU are just a moody little brat, your not emotionally unstable, YOU just can't_control _YOURSELF!" Mr Digby bellowed."Why can't you be like everybody else, calm, in control" As he continued shouting looking at the mess of a bear that lay unconscious on the lab floor. I looked at myself, his dark blood stained my light red paws paws. I paused for a moment frozen.

How did this happen? Why can't I remember anything? I could feel adrenalin pumping its way to my body now making me shake and feel unsteady. SHIT! it has happened again, what if they take me from Dan- or worse put me into intensive care, or some other mental asylum. I can't go back, what would I do, they would be feeding me sugar pills night and day until I get sick, then they would say that I'm not responding to the treatment. I was starting to get badly anxious now.

Ok, stop. what happened? what did this poor bear do to have provoked me enough to make me snap? I took another look at the quite large bear, lying on his back starting to cough some blood up. I felt truly sorry for him, I didn't mean for this to happen, any of it. The small canine teacher, remarkably taller than me, turned to the bear again running his hands through his head fur, not knowing what to do. He quickly knelt down next to the bear to try to communicate.

_Get yourself together Chris, you have to leave, now. Soon they will be here to come to get me, take me back. _I got myself up with the aid of a desk, about to briskly make my way out, somewhere.

"Where the fuck do you think you are going. Sit down let them take you and tie you up in a straight jacket, like the monster you are." He bellowed as he turned his attention to the bear.

I gave him an assertive but puzzled look. He can't say that, what a- I paused for a second, I'm already in enough trouble as it is. I could teach him, make an example of him, just like the bear. This is the perfect time, he's not even looking. This is the first time I was willingly letting myself do this, I have _full control but now that there is nothing worth fighting for why not enjoy myself. _What am I thinking? this is exactly what they warned me about. Stop! I could feel the rage pouring through me like a rapid, everything that had happened, it was all _HIS _fault, I would make him pay.

I braised myself for this, standing in a powerful stance, ready to deliver a hard blow to the hound looking the other way. I had never been taught this it was just... natural.

Just as I lunged with a powerful right hook. I felt a sharp sting on my neck, it overcame all my senses, I can't see, my vision is hazed I can't hear, anything but that deafening shriek. Everything froze, I was immobilised. Paralysed with my paws over my ears, on my back against a wall cowering.

What is he saying? Why cant I make anything out?. Whatever he was saying it fuelled me further. I got up seeing that he was prepared for me this time but mounted no defence. I lunged again only to have the same thing happen. What is this? the collar of course-. My fight or flight reactions were kicking me hard now, I couldn't stay here I thought as I bolted out the door and further. There was only one place I knew where to hide. I couldn't be found not unless someone followed me, but I still kept looking back all the way there. The way there was a blur, I ended in the clearing the large oaks covered the area perfectly, not too much so it was cramped but enough for a small fox like me to be lost and hopefully never found.

I tried to collect my thoughts, but I was shaking like crazy. What had just happened? Will Dan forgive me, he always did.Then as expected came the addrenallin crash, all my thoughts were overwhelmed, I felt wasted, I rest my head on an overgrown oak and the light's went out. Even though my body was undisturbed and static my mind wasn't, I dreamt up all sorts of nightmares about Dan,the Unit I was at and how much I swore I would never return, all the defected memories I have of my parents, the abuse, all the conflicts everywhere I looked. Never once can my mind be at ease.