FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

Things continued like that for a while. Catherine and I worked ourselves hard every Saturday and Sunday, and I shared mostly quiet car rides with Laurence before and after. I started bringing homework with me to do in the car; it was always difficult finding time to get it done.

On weekdays, I went to play with Garet and the rest of them after school. Things had started getting a bit more relaxed. I was letting myself go a little bit more, but I still wasn't giving it my all. I was beginning to realize that if I wanted to, I could dominate on the court. I was still easily the strongest on defence, even while holding back. I couldn't know unless I tried, but I knew that I was getting to the point where I could probably outdo most of them on offence as well. My training with Catherine was definitely yielding results for me. I was starting to see openings where I hadn't before, and feeling that I could outmanoeuvre even some of our fastest players.

It was a few weeks into training with her that I finally learned why Catherine really wanted me to help her. Her parents were away that weekend, and I was thankful. Her father or mother would always come in to watch for a while, their presence made me uncomfortable. Even worse, when her parents were around, they always forced me to stay for dinner. Their rich, expensive food and awkward conversation never sat well with me.

We were working on simple passing drills, but for some reason Catherine didn't seem to be into it. There was none of the singular drive and focus that normally pushed her. Her passes, though better than they'd been before we started our practices, lacked the usual sting whenever I caught them.

I didn't comment on it. If she had something to say, she would find a way to say it. We just kept up our drills, with me occasionally giving her direction.

When she finally bridged the topic, it was abrupt as usual. "Hiro. You know that my plan is to go pro, right?"

"Right."

She nodded, then hesitated. That made me nervous. I stopped what I was doing to look over at her.

"What is it?"

"Things get... rought at the pro level."

"So?"

"I need you to teach me how to take a hit."

I stared at her for a few long seconds, unsure how to respond to that. She met my gaze, not blinking.

"...you're joking, right?"

"I'm being very serious."

"No, you're joking. You want me to teach you how to take a hit?"

"What's so odd about that?"

"Look at me." I held my arms out to the sides, and gestured down at myself. In my workout clothes, it was easy to see my scrawny build. What muscle there was was tightly coiled, but it wasn't much. My black and grey and white feathers padded me out a bit, but not much. "I'm not exactly what most people would call 'tough.'"

"That's why I want your help." I raised an eyebrow at her, and she continued. "I need somebody who isn't too tough to start out with. We start playing a bit more physical. As you start getting stronger, though, it'll force me to gradually get better, too."

I started thinking about what she'd just said. It made sense, in its own weird way. As I considered the logic, though, something started dawning on me. I waited a few seconds, trying to decide how best to say it. Then, at length, I just blurted it out. "That's why you asked me to be your personal trainer, isn't it? Your dad could've paid for anybody to train you, but you picked me."

She hesitated, then nodded. That crest of dyed blue feathers on top of her head was slowly going up. She didn't like that I was guessing at her motives, but I didn't care all that much. I was curious now. Finally, she said, "Hiro, during the fall, I tried finding players around my age at just about every court and basketball club in the city. You were the first person I met that could come close to me. Everything that happened with Garet... that wasn't planned. Asking you to train one-on-one with me, though? I've been planning that for months."

I mulled over that, and then said, "Alright. That still doesn't mean I'm alright with teaching the daughter of a millionaire how to take a hit, though."

"Dad won't mind."

"Won't he? Sorry, but I'm not exactly keen on testing that."

Catherine drew herself up at that. Sometimes, I forgot just how much taller she was than me. She glared down at me over her curved beak as she spoke. "I want you to help me improve. Part of that is helping me toughen up so that I can actually handle a more aggressive game. If you aren't going to help me with that, then maybe I don't need you as my trainer."

She let the ultimatum hang in the air, just as simple and sudden as that. I was more than a bit surprised by how matter-of-fact the whole exchange had been. But there it was. For a moment, I wanted to just tell her to her face that I didn't need to train her, either. As I thought about that, though, I knew it wasn't true. I'd had to quit my other job to start training her; it wouldn't be easy for a 15 year old to find another one. On top of that, I was really liking having the extra money from training her. I had to be careful to make sure my mom and dad didn't notice the extra food I was buying. I always had to sneak it in guiltily after practice when I got home. Normally, I would just get smaller packages of things we already had, and fill up the larger, half-empty packages. It was ridiculous, and probably far more trouble than I really had to put in, but for some reason it mattered to me.

At length, I just said, "Fine."

"Good. You should probably start bulking up a bit, then."

We went back to practicing. If anything, it was even quieter than before. Catherine had just, very effectively, proven who was in control of the situation. She knew now that I wanted to keep training her, and that gave her power. Lots of power. I didn't like the feeling.

The knowledge that I was going to have to start working out led to more problems. This wasn't the sort of stuff I could just do on my own. If I'd wanted to tone my muscles more, I easily could've started running. But for this, I needed to put on some bulk, and that meant lifting weights. To be frank, I didn't know the first thing about weight lifting. I wasn't sure how heavy I should go, or how many reps I should, how to lift without hurting myself, or even where I would go to find some weights to use.

I puzzled over this for a few days, and it started turning into another weight on my frayed nerves. There wasn't a huge rush, but I knew that I needed to start working out at some point if I wanted to see any results.

The solution came to me slowly. I think, in the back of my head, I'd known what I would have to do from the moment that Catherine brought up bulking up. Maybe it had been the way she'd said it: taking a hit. There was only one person I knew who could definitely teach me about bulking up, and probably also give me a crash course on taking a hit.

I didn't approach Garet for another week. I kept trying to think of a way to bring it up, but I couldn't. How do you casually tell somebody who's been trying to intimidate you for three years that you want them to teach you how to toughen up? Besides, things had been strained between the two of us since I came back after my time away from the court. I would never say that Garet and I were close, but we could at least get along and talk easily before. Now most of our talks wound up ending in awkward silences.

I took my time changing out of my basketball shoes after the game that day, constantly checking to see how many people were left, and whether or not Garet looked like he was leaving. He was talking with Ralph, the big echidna who'd been playing with us for a few months.

Finally, Ralph left, bidding both of us goodbye as he walked away. The sun was starting to get low in the sky by this point, and the air was already growing cool. There was a long moment of silence as I stayed where I was, crouched on the ground with my shoelaces already done up. I wasn't looking at Garet at this point. I just had my eyes straight down, not wanting to betray that I was nervous about talking to him.

"Well... I'll see you tomorrow, Hiro."

I heard him start walking away, and finally swallowed the lump in my throat. "Hey, Garet."

The footsteps stopped. I finally forced myself to look up. The big croc was looking over his shoulder at me, an eyebrow raised. "What's up?"

I took a long, deep breath. "You're, uh..." I stopped. He raised an eyebrow at me. "You're pretty big." Oh boy. I was doing well with the words. Garet's expression grew even more incredulous.

"...you could say that?"

Okay, fine. I guess I'd already blown my chances of easing into the topic. "Teach me how to work out so I can get bigger."

The incredulous look turned to surprise, before slowly shifting to suspicion. The big croc kept his eyes narrowed, and growled out, "Why? You're a point guard. You love playing guard. You're better off being fast and flexible."

I didn't know quite how to respond to that for a few long moments. I obviously couldn't tell him that I needed to get bigger so that I could pass on his lessons to Catherine and toughen her up. I hadn't really planned on how to explain away my request, though.

Then, abruptly, I realized that I was already talking. "I'm tired of you pushing me around." Oh dear. Where was I going with that? My beak was still going, though. "Look, I enjoy playing with all of you guys, but I'm tired of being the birdy with brittle bones. There isn't much I can do to toughen myself up, but I can at least learn how to give as good as I get."

Garet kept staring me down, but his expression was changing slightly. There wasn't all that aggression anymore. Instead, there was a hint of... curiosity? "Why do you think I'd want to help you?"

Again, I was speaking before I realized it. "Because you owe me." When Garet didn't react, I went on. "You've been an ass to me this year. You want to be a bully and pick fights with Catherine? Fine, that's your business. Dragging me into it, though, and especially talking about my dad? That's crossing a line, and you know it."

I fell silent after that. Somehow among our exchange I'd stood up straight, and was glaring at him. I could feel the feathers along my neck and shoulders puffing up in aggression, but for once I didn't try to hide it. Garet's expression didn't change as he watched me.

I genuinely had no idea where all of that had come from. I'd never spoken that plainly with Garet before; certainly never so aggressively. As I stood there, thinking about everything I'd said, though, I knew that I'd meant every word. Whatever relationship Garet and I had had before Catherine had entered into the picture, it was changed now, and Garet was responsible. I'd been quietly festering about the comments he'd made about my dad in the Fall, and the threats he'd made against me. I guess they were all things that I'd been thinking, but hadn't had the opportunity to say up until then.

Finally, after what felt like a very long time, Garet nodded to me. "Alright."

I blinked. "That's it? 'Alright?'"

"Yeah. You're right. I've been an ass to you lately. I owe you."

I just stared at him, unsure if he was trying to mess with me or not. At length, though, I just muttered, "Uh... alright."

"So what time can you meet me for training?"

I thought about that, quickly realizing just how little time I had. At length, I said, "Well... I'm here every weekday night. And I work days on Saturday and Sunday."

"Saturday and Sunday night, then? I normally work out at the Y." He paused, then said, "You'll have to get a membership."

That stopped me. I did some math in my head. If it wasn't too much, I could probably cover a gym membership with the extra money that I was making from training Catherine. It probably wouldn't be too much...

"Does that work for you, Hiro?" Garet paused, and then muttered, "I mean, if you really needed a hand, I'm sure I could, uh, find you some extra work somewhere."

"I'll scrape it together," I replied quickly. He nodded.

The two of us were quiet for a little bit, and finally Garet cleared his throat. "Well then, er... see you then. Oh, and, uh, if you're really serious about getting bigger, you should probably try eating more. At the very least eating heartier food."

He was saying it thinking that that would be a problem for me. The look on my face probably made him think he was right. I wasn't dismayed thinking about where I would find the money to do that, though; I was thinking about the dinner invitations I'd have to start accepting at Catherine's house. If I wanted to eat enough to start getting bigger, then, well...

"I think I can do that."

"Alright." He hesitated, and the two of us just stood there awkwardly for a few seconds. "I, uh... I guess I'll see you."

"Right. Er, thanks."

"No worries." He started turning to leave, then hesitated again. I'd never seen the big crocodile looking so out of his element before. At length, he said, "You're right, you know? I took things too far. I'm sorry that I did."

I didn't know how to respond, so I just cleared my throat. Finally, I just said, "Why did you?"

Garet eyed me, and I could tell he was sizing me up. I met his gaze, and for once I didn't feel scared or intimidated doing it. When he spoke, it was with a shrug. "I'm not good at much, Hiro. Didn't like thinking that some pampered brat was better than me." He finally turned and started walking away after that, calling over his shoulder, "I'll see you tomorrow, man."

So that was it. I was feeling really good on my way home. I was walking with more of a jump to my step than I'd had for months. I felt like I'd finally made good with Garet, and I was going to be able to help Catherine out at the same time. I wasn't worried about either of them finding out about my arrangement with the other; I never even saw Catherine during the week anymore, and Garet had no way of knowing where I went during the day on weekends.

I knew it was going to be a lot of work, but I was almost looking forward to it. Sure, it would make it a bit more difficult to get homework done, but I always had weeknights after basketball.

So yeah, I was happy on my way home, which was a nice break from the usual. I took the stairs up to our apartment two at a time, not even trying to hide the grin on my beak. "I'm home!" I called as I stepped in the door.

I heard my brother and sister call back to me from somewhere deeper into the apartment; probably our room. By the time I got home most days, the two of them would already be done with their homework and have claimed our bedroom for their own uses. I didn't mind; it meant I got to use the kitchen table for my work, which had its own perks.

I headed over for the kitchen, already slinging down my backpack off of my shoulders. As I stepped inside, my mom looked over at me from the stove, where she was stirring sizzling meat and vegetables around in a pan. The strong scent of familiar spices hung heavily in the air, and I breathed it in as I took a seat.

"Hiro." Mom sounded relieved as she saw me. She was still wearing her uniform from work, the painfully neutral-coloured blouse and pants a bit wrinkled. My good mood faded a bit when I saw that. "Do you think you could watch dinner for me while I go change?"

"Sure." I had already gotten out my books and laid them on the table. I picked up a book I was reading for English, and then headed over to take the wooden spoon from her. As I started stirring the food around, I asked as casually as I could, "Dad not feeling great today?" Generally, if my dad was feeling alright, he would help mom with dinner while she got changed and relaxed after work. If she hadn't had a chance to change, though...

"No, no, don't worry. He was actually feeling better today. He decided to go out and try to do some driving."

That surprised me. It had been over a month since my dad had last tried to take the taxi out. I nodded in response, and my mom headed into her and my father's bedroom. I just stayed by the food, stirring it occasionally as I read. The smells were slowly melting together, the individual vegetables and spices all bleeding together. Occasionally, I heard either my brother or my sister yelling from our room, but it never lasted long. They'd long since worked out their own way of dealing with arguments.

Eventually my mom came back and took over the cooking for me. I went back over to the table, and started on my other homework. The two of us were quiet for a while; we were both used to the arrangement, and we were comfortable with the silence as we both worked.

It was as I was working on my math that mom finally broke the silence. "So how was basketball today?"

"It was good." I hesitated, thinking. I would have to tell her eventually. "Actually, I'm, uh... I'm planning on working out with some of my teammates on Saturday and Sunday from now on. After work."

Mom paused at that. The silence in the room had suddenly gone from light and comfortable to heavy and stifling. "Oh. At a gym?"

"Yeah. It's at the YMCA." I was speaking quickly, trying to cut off her questions. "They have a financial aid program. I wouldn't have to pay much for the membership."

"Alright. Not with that Garet, right?"

"He would be there, too." I kept my face down as I said the next bit, hoping she wouldn't see the lie. "There are a few of us that would be going together, though."

She was very quiet. I could feel the next question forming in her head, but I couldn't bring myself to cutting this one off. When she finally asked it, her voice was very strained. "But... weekend nights are some of the only times we get to see you anymore."

"I would still be at home on weeknights!" Tired as hell, but I would be here.

"But you spend most of your weeknights doing your homework. Most of the rest of that time we spend doing chores or getting groceries."

"This is something I really want to do, mom." I'm doing this for you guys. I don't like when we run out of cereal and milk by Friday morning and have to send Mai and Ken to school with just a bowl of rice for breakfast.

"Is it about your dad?"

"No." Yes. Everything's about dad nowadays.

"Hiro, I know it makes you uncomfortable sometimes, but you can't just run away from him. He's your father."

"I'm not." I love him. Even when I have to help him walk to the bathroom so he can retch in the toilet, I'm proud of him. I hate seeing him like this, though.

Everything was quiet for a few long seconds. Then, at length, she said, "Alright, Hiro. I won't say no if you've set your mind to this. You have to tell your father, though."

I nodded, already dreading the conversation. "Alright."

With that, she went back to making dinner, and I went back to my homework. I could feel that familiar, gnawing pit opening in my guts again, though. For a wonderful hour or two, I'd been in a good mood. Now, I was dreading when my father inevitably got home, and I would have to tell him my plans. He would understand, though. If he could see the whole situation, he would understand why I was doing it.

Then why didn't I just tell him?

My pencil stopped on my workbook as that thought hit me. I stayed just like that, staring down at the paper for a few long seconds. I couldn't come up with an answer, though, so I pushed the question away, off to some other part of my head to deal with later. My head was starting to run out of room for such thoughts.