Tea Leaves
#1 of Letters From the Jade Emperor
A Letter from the Jade Emperor of China (or more accurately a dignitary under him) to another province. Xue Lin the snow leopard is sending a letter to Xnghong Zue the red panda to ask her about some tea plants that are destined for use by the Emperor, Yu Long himself. To be honest I actually started and posted this as a joke/random idea on FurAffinity but it actually turned out to be rather fun for me. This is for fun, not a serious attempt at writing, but I will update it randomly whenever I get ideas for it. I hope someone likes it and finds it at least somewhat amusing.
Letters From The Jade Emperor: Tea Leaves
The following message comes directly from the Forbidden City Palace which resides in the capital of the Sovereign Empire of China. His majesty the Jade Emperor of the Dragon Clan, ruler of the united provinces, and many clans, the voice of heaven, and source of unending wisdom wishes for you to hear his words. May his wisdom shine forth through those who have been graced by his presence.
Yu Long the wise and ruler of all the provinces wishes to bestow upon Xinghong Zhu of the Red Panda Clan his highest and most valued regards for the gift of Longjing or Dragon Well Tea that you sent after the recent harvest. His eminence asks that you be informed of his overflowing delight for the new strain of tea plants. Also the Jade Emperor requests that you establish as many of these new plants as possible so that they can come to maturity all the sooner. If more workers are needed then our wise master has seen fit to send you as many workers as you feel the need with all expenses paid by the Jade Emperor's private treasury here at the Forbidden City.
If possible Yu Long would like a few plants to be sent to the capital along with instructions for their care so that he may have a personal harvest supply. The Jade Emperor's love of tea is renowned throughout the Sovereign Empire and he can be quite temperamental about it as all those of the Dragon Clan are when it comes to their personal vices. So for the sake (and sanity) of all those touched by the Jade Emperor, Yu Long's presence, I respectfully ask that you make the utmost haste in replying to this particular matter above all else.
Written by the Emperor's emissary Xue Lin of the Snow Leopard Clan and stamped with the official Celestial Dragon seal as proof of authenticity.
To Xue Lin in regards to the Jade Emperor's Wishes:
About time you got back to me you stupid cat! I've been sitting on this batch of tea plants for so long my tail has gone numb! If you ever bothered to give me a formal method of sending these plants to the palace at the Forbidden City then you would have gotten them weeks ago!
I doubt just packing them up on the nearest cart and sending them on their way with a nice thumbs up would go over very well with our esteemed Emperor especially if he found out that they were damaged somehow. Although in that case it would likely be your head on the line and not mine.
The best method would be for me to travel with the plants and personally instruct the new caretakers on the best methods as far as water, light, and temperature requirements go. There are also special soil demands. I'd hate for someone to be thrown in jail because Yu Long's tea was not raised with the right amount of soil acidity and tasted bad as a result. The plants are already mature but if you want the best harvest then you'll still have to wait until spring of next year. That will give the plants time to adjust to the new environment and give the harvesters time to learn how to take care of them properly.
Contrary to some people's beliefs (primarily you) tea plants cannot just be stuck in the ground and harvested in a few months. It's like a fine wine. It takes years to cultivate and bring out their true essence.
At least the Jade Emperor realizes that. Now if only he could find an emissary with the same amount of respect I could die a happy death.
Written by Xinghong Zhu of the Red Panda Clan. Stamped with a red pawprint not that I need to because no one else would talk to you this way.
To Xinghong Zhu the "famed" Madam of Tea:
A messenger and special wagon will be sent to you so that the plants may be transported safely. A scroll containing detailed instructions are to be written up and given to the messenger as well. If you wish for someone to accompany our messenger back to the Forbidden City then temporary passports will be issued allowing them passage into the palace grounds.
Also, you may get your death wish yet. If I see you anywhere in the Forbidden City I will have you arrested for insolence and disrespect towards the Emperor's servant and have you hung publicly while I sit in the capital library writing a poem in calligraphy about how the Sovereign State is better off without your childish antics.
Written by the Emperor's emissary Xue Lin of the Snow Leopard Clan and stamped with the official Celestial Dragon seal as proof of authenticity.
To Xue Lin also known as kitty cranky pants:
Oh quit getting your tail in a knot already I'm not going anywhere near you. The summer tea harvest is coming up in about a month and I have a lot to prepare for especially since I want to send another shipment to Yu Long.
We owe him our livelihood and our homes. I would go on about his wisdom and awe inspiring presence and all that, but he's still keeping you around so he can't be all that smart if you ask me.
The shipment will be ready to go whenever the Jade Emperor's servants arrive to take it.
Written by Xinghong Zhu of the Red Panda Clan. Stamped with a red pawprint to represent the Red Panda Clan.