Second Draft of First Story
Edited Version of my First Draft
(Things with weird names are in Latin, they should be in italics but it didn't transfer)
It's not pleasant being struck with lightning. Neither is being trapped underwater for a minute straight. Or doing all of this while almost dying from exhaustion. Even after going through all that, there was still more to fight against. The grassy fields of Florida were amazing in the summer time, and the place looked so beautiful in the evening's sunset. Other than the fact that I was trying to be killed, it was almost like a mini vacation.
I looked around at the buildings in ruins, either exploded, electrocuted to dust, or sliced into pieces by hundred mile per hour wind. The regular nice and comforting grass was torched to nothingness, and the small but cozy houses were charred and broken. Ash littered the ground, and almost everything was either slashed or cut into pieces. Including me. In the distance I could see a forest still burning, courtesy of this abomination of a fight. I was helpless, and ready to give up.
Another bolt of lightning shot by as I dodged it, running back to a discarded piece of wall. "It doesn't need to be like this, Nick!" I yelled out into the murkiness of the evening. Nick's soothing but wicked voice boomed through out the destroyed field "Oh, but it does, Shawn, it does. There's no point anymore, to trying to be good. The only way to be strong is to follow the path of hatred," Nick yelled back, his dark brown hair blew back in the wind, and his ice-cold stare could chill anything. His fully built body made him a very intimidating person, especially considering that he was older than me, and 6' 5". I was always the smarter one, and he could never accept that. He grew up being jealous that his younger brother was more successful that him.
But because of that, he grew up full of hatred, the constant reminder that he was worse than his younger brother. And now, his hatred has made him stronger than ever, and for once, he is the strongest. I wiped the sweat off my forehead, thinking of some type of plan to get away. Enough harm was already done to the landscape, and I didn't have that much more fighting capacity. And even though I was recovering, so was Nick. I also knew that the cover I was currently at could be blown away simply by a gust of wind, so I had to think fast.
With a quick dash I ran out of cover, Fulmen Draconi! I yelled in my head, jumping out of cover and aiming at Nick. A bright, white light formed at my palm, forming into the shape of a dragon in an instant, and launching itself at Nick. It struck him square in the chest, and struck him down to the ground. I sighed a little sigh of relief. Nick echoed a laugh of pity. "Pretty good, Shawn. But you're almost completely dried out," Nick laughed, sitting up. With a twisted smile on his face, Nick looked me straight in the eyes and said, "I'm just beginning," standing up and aiming his hand at me. A red wall erupted from his hand, enveloping me in a sphere of flames. Scuta Terrae! I thought as I surrounded myself with rock, blocking out the fire's raging heat. But something didn't seem right.
"You fell for it, Shawn." I heard Nick say. I turned around in disbelief as Nick leaped toward with a hand surrounded by a shifting white aura. He charged his hand back and launched himself at me. With a quick jump, I dodged it, barely, and his hand cut right into the rock shield, leaving a hole for the still burning fire to get in. I hammered him with a closed fist right in the head, and he fell to the ground. But not for long. He sprang up and hit me directly in the chin with an upper-cut. I fell the ground, writhing in pain. "Oh, my bad!" Nick said with a fake gasp. It instantaneously vanished and was replaced by the harsh stare I know so well. His dark brown eyes gave off such a menacing look, it's almost like he was made to be evil. The fire was starting to enter the little barrier, and with a fake frown Nick cut open the top of the rock sphere. "Goodbye, Shawn," he said, using the ability to summon wind to his advantage, he shot himself out of the hole and into air, escaping the fireball. Then the fire came.
With an explosive blast, my rock protection crumbled down to the ground, destroyed. The fire rushed in, and I had to think fast. Aquam Extinguant! I screamed in my head. My brain was yelling in agony to stop and give up, along with my sore, helpless body. But I couldn't. The situation was to fragile to give up. If I did, all other people like me would be slaughtered. I had to stop him here. No matter what.
Water surrounded me as I ducked for cover as the fire got closer and closer to me. Hopefully the water will work... And it did. Little by little, the fire went away, leaving me and a sphere of water in field full of ash and rubble . The water vanished as I collapsed on the ash-ridden ground. My breathing was slow and ragged, and I could tell my head had taken enough. I could barely move my arms, or my legs, or anything else. As I flipped myself over like a patty on a grill, I scanned the area for Nick.
Slowly, and painfully surely, I stood up, ready to fight again. But I wasn't. With a terrible crack, my knee gave way, and I collapsed, wounded badly but with enough adrenaline to run a marathon. It took a lot of stumbling and effort, but finally, I got up. And scanned my surroundings, looking wildly for Nick. Even though I wanted to think he won, I know he didn't. I quietly waited for him to reappear, improvising a strategy as fast as a fatigued brain could process. If Nick didn't show up soon then there was some type of trouble elsewhere. Nick was never able to be trusted with power, and now that he has a place to put his hatred, he was almost unstoppable. In my condition, I couldn't stop a teenage girl, much less one of the most powerful Summoners in history.
Rethinking my plan over made it two times harder to implement, since it was so idiotic. I was just hoping at the time that Nick was still ticklish. It wasn't the best idea.
Limping, I was finally able to reach Nick's next target to attack. My home. Which was just great, considering that the door was wide open. I was probably half a football field away when I saw a white flash burst through a window, exploding, glass shattering and falling. Damn... I thought, pushing my limp to more of an excruciating gallop. As I approached, more windows broke, more lights flashed and bangs sounded. Finally, I reached the doorstep, which was covered in shards of class and debris of wall. Crunching followed as I stepped through the doorway. An explosion boomed at the east side of the house, and some more wall debris joined the floor. "Why, hello Shawn! Pleasure meeting you here!" I heard Nick yell, his voice echoing through the wore-down house. I was in no shape for another element summon. The best I could do was a fist-fight, and even with that I wouldn't last. My head felt like it was about to explode, and if I continued like I was, my brain would explode. I stopped trying to find Nick and decided an ambush would be a better approach. Slowly, I walked behind a random doorway and with my remaining strength, I made a decoy.Petra! my head yelled, and a simple rock formed in my palm. I threw it at the glass-ridden ground, and crunches and cracking followed. "Sloppy, Shawn. I would think you would be able to walk without making sound, considering you used to brag about how silent you were. Pa-thetic" Nick said, this time closer. He was almost at the ambush spot when he stopped, and I started to hear a faint humming sound. He summonded wind? I thought, getting myself ready to jump out. "Don't ambush the ambusher," I heard him say. My eyes widened in disbelief as Nick cut through the wall, missing me by inches. Nick went for a wild haymaker with a wind blade at his fingertips, and with a swift duck I dodged it, and went for an upper-cut. Without any elements, a regular punch won't pack any power, but it was worth a shot. I tightended my fists and sprung up, and extended my arm with no mercy. It connected into Nick's exposed jaw, and he shot into the air, and landed right on his bottom. He got up and staggered back, looking disorientated. He regained contol, and stood straight up. Without taunting, he summoned electricity at both hands and lounged forward, sending jabs and hooks, missing each time. I blocked a hook and attempted to send a hammer fist, and he jumped back, dodging the attack, the electricity dying from his hands. "Even without the elements you've lasted this long? You should give up now, Shawn. It's only gonna go downhill from here," Nick said, cracking his knuckles. He fell for it. Apparatus, Prurientes! I thought, and an arm protruded from the wall behind Nick. It sprouted a hand and snuck up on Nick, silently and slowly. "It's over, Shawn. You lost," Nick said, raising his hand as sparks started coming from his hand. The hand was almost at Nick. "Goodbye, Shawn. Sorry it had to end this way," Nick finished, and his hand was almost ready to shoot a bolt when the hand reached him. I smiled as the electricity from his hand vanished, followed by laughing. Lots of uncontrollable laughing. He clutched his stomach as the hand tickled his armpits, giving me the advantage. Ventus Herba! my mind yelled, and with an excruciating amount of pain, I charged forward with the sharpest blade of wind I could make, and stabbed Nick right in the chest. His face was full of confusion as I took my hand out of his chest, the smile wiping from his face. The tickling machine crumbled to pieces and I did too, collapsing to the ground in exhaustion, as Nick followed.