PokeNom: Pika-Piss in the Corner
Ash Rapeum takes pokemon seriously. Seriously, enough to make Steve Irwin look like a amateur at raping crocodiles.
PokeNom: Pika-Piss in the Corner!
This shit contains the Beer, Barf, and Bastard versions. Trade between Bastard and Barf to get the Beer exclusive BONGWHIFF and rare MUNKYASS with all new HM "Shit Throw", guaranteed super effective against Electric fags.
-The Pisstastic Pikachu Adventure-
It was really just another day. Honestly. I mean, a typical ordinary day when nothing is better than waking up to Pikachu. Waking up with Pikachu in your pants..
Now that is another story.
About the time you start feeling it, you're already reaching for the baseball bat and beating the shit out of the bulging, squirming lump that reminds you of the boners you used to try to hide from your local Nurse Joy who looked the same as every other bitch in a poke-center. Of course, hitting a Pikachu with a bat while he's in your crotch isn't a very good idea. This was found out by Ash Rapeum, an electric spark sending him into fits of testicular trauma. Half-asleep, and massive amounts of steam rolling out of his pants, he scowled and started smacking his bed. "Pikachu! You little rat-shit fucker! Get the fuck outta my ass now!!" he screamed, and Pikachu popped his head out of the blanket, an annoyed look on its face. "Pika! Pika-pika U!!" it cried, and flipped off Ash, eating the 3-day old cheetoh he had pulled outta his pants. "You little bastard! Get the fuck back into your Pokeball you little piece of shit, or I'm gonna get your dick neutered today!" Ash screamed, Pikachu's eyes widening as it dropped the cheese puff and scurried for its ball as quick as it could, "Damn, now I have to trim my pubes! I have to look good for this next fucking Pokebattle or I'll never be able to show my cock around here again!!" Ash screamed, jumping out of bed. Suddenly, his mom burst in the room, half naked with a bottle of liquor in her hand. "Ash shut the fuck up, please Honey? Me and Mr. Mime are trying to get it on and we need some fucking privacy!" she said, sleepily. Ash just grimaced. "God mom, it's like 10 in the fucking morning. And you've killed like, 5 Mr. Mimes already. Your pussy must smell like a Mudkips asshole!!" Ash murmured. His mom stood there, her hands on her hips. "Yeah, well, Prof. Oak should be over here later, then the real fun will begin! He's bringing his Jynx over so things should get interesting!" she said giggling, and Ash almost barfed. "By the way, Prof. Oak says he has something for you, so you better get your ass up and get the fuck downstairs. I don't want to catch your Pikachu watching that Diglett porn again either. Oak said that was for research purposes only!!" she scowled, and Pikachu's pokeball shook violently, meaning Pikachu was wishing he could shove his electric penis down the bitches throat. Ash sighed, "Okay mom, hold your tampons. Jeez, I'll be downstairs in a minute!" Ash's mom went back to her room and he could hear smacking noises and moaning that could scare a Haunter back to puberty. Ash lazily got out of bed, and snatched up his pokeballs, shoving them into his old-ass backpack, which he'd owned for like 6 television series ever since it was raped by a Magikarp. That, and his mom usually blew all the child support checks since he was, like, 10. Strangely, all the pokemon Ash ever caught really, really, really liked his backpack. In fact, a few battles back Pikachu had tried fucking it to try to make a Pichu but ended up exhausting itself, causing Ash's Treecko to get face-raped by a Charizard. Then there was the time a Koffing shit all over it and it took a week before the toxins washed out. There was a vet trip the next day which resulted in the Koffing having to be sterilized and turned into gasoline for Ash's mom's D.I.Y. sex machine she kept in the closet. Ash hated Koffings more than any pokemon, mostly because they shit all over everything and just said "koffing" "koffing" and gay shit like that 'till your dick imploded. Of course, a lot of the pokemon said the same shit over and over, but Ash'd rather hear his Plusle whine about its electric herpes in some unintelligible jibber-jabber than hear that fucking wheezing sound Koffing made any time of the day. Ash raced downstairs, dodging boxes and other bullshit his mom had packed in the hallways, mostly leftovers from the last acid party she had hosted where people brought their Oddishes and Glooms and harvested their LSD chemicals. Ash didn't particularly care for them himself, not since the time a coked-out Slowking had barricaded itself in his bathroom for about a week when he had the worst case of the shits...