Chapter 7

Story by tfamonk on SoFurry

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#7 of Return to Decadence

Sorry for the big gap between chapters, finals followed by the holidays really screws with a schedule, especially when you work in retail.

Again, thanks to readasaur for helping me write this, and circeus for editing!


The four of them made their way down the tree. The winding staircases and pathways which reminded Nate of a fun house the previous night were far easier to navigate in the light of day, and now seemed far more like a children's playhouse; especially because the majority of the fixtures and rooms they passed seemed to be scaled down to about half the human norm.

"So young healer, should I continue my explanation?" Nate glanced down at Zinoe as they exited the tree's complex, the glowing imp looking up at him with a serene smile, an expression that seemed to rarely leave his face.

Nate put on his best fake smile, which wasn't very good admittedly, "Well, I was hoping to talk to Zericho before we got to the markets, to be honest, Zinoe. Thank you though." As awkward and uncomfortable a discussion with Zericho might be, Nate felt it was better than someone trying to proselytize to him about such an... unusual lifestyle.

If Zinoe detected Nate's lie, he didn't show it, "Very well, I suppose I should discuss the purchase of armor with our orc friend anyway." He said, without his smile ever fading.

Nate quickly made his way up to Zericho, the prince trotting at the front of the group. "So how was your night?" He said excitedly, a nervous edge to his voice.

"What?" Zericho was momentarily surprised, before he glanced back and realized what was happening, at which point he chuckled darkly, "Oh man, you really screwed up kid."

"Shut up." Nate mumbled, doing his best to hide his shame and embarrassment.

Zericho rolled his eyes, "Just tell the windbag you aren't interested. It's not that hard, I do it all the time."

Nate shook his head, "I can't do that. It's rude, I already told him I was interested."

Zericho shrugged, not understanding where the dilemma lay, "So what? Tell him that you were just being polite, and you aren't interested in his ugly ass."

Nate didn't agree with this line of action, "He'll know I lied to him! He'll... I mean..." He struggled to finish the sentence, "...it's complicated, okay?"

Zericho scoffed, "What's complicated? You say no, he says okay, you move on. It's simple."

Nate sighed, "But what if I... offend him or something?"

Zericho couldn't believe he was still having this conversation, "By the gods' balls, kid, you need to get over this."

Nate was silent for several minutes before he decided to change the subject. "So how was your night? Really?"

Zericho laughed, before spreading his wings it what Nate imagined was a stretch, "Oh, it was great, thanks for asking. It's really great to be among my own kind again for a while, no offense."

Nate was silent for a few moments. "...you had tons of sex didn't you?"

Zericho sighed, "Well duh! Kid, you say it like it was a bad thing." He floated up to be at eye level with the human, "I mean, when was the last time you got laid? I'm starting to think I should set you up or something, just to help you unwind."

Nate blushed before pushing past the imp. "I'm going to have to turn down that offer, as... generous as it is."

Zericho followed close behind. "You didn't answer my first question. I mean the way you're going on, I'm guessing it's been at least a week, kid."

Nate laughed sardonically, "Yeah... yeah, a week. Sure."

The walk through the park was peaceful enough, as there seemed to be few people strolling along this early, though Nate would be unfortunately subjected to the sight of a naked Satyr sauntering along without any clothes on, who greeted them all with a smile. Neither Imps did more than nod in response, which meant this probably wasn't so unusual a sight. Leaving the park through one of the ornate arches that seemed to depict a trio of Imps crawling along the ironwork, they headed towards the center of town.

The first thing Nate would notice was the smell. It wasn't an unpleasant smell, more like the faint odor one got standing close to boys after gym class, not the raw stench of body odor. It was mingled with the scent of exotic spices and the distant sound of a crowd. The houses and shops that they passed started showing signs of higher upkeep and brighter, warmer colors as they headed towards that sounded like the busy side of down. Both Imps glanced at Nate, and while Zericho looked amused, Zinoe smiled in what he hoped was a comforting way. "Try not to fret, little brother. We all walk our own paths." The source of their amusement and concern became clear as they reached the Imp district and Nate became aware that there were whores everywhere he looked.

Nate blushed heavily, and did his best to not break out in hysterics. Instead, he tried to keep all of his numerous questions inside his head, questions like: Do these people have that much of a sex drive? Is there some kind of overseeing where they all get tested for STD's? How was it possible for there to be this many prostitutes? Surely the laws of supply and demand mandate that there should be, at best, maybe one for every fifty people, but it looked like the ratio was more along the lines of one to ten! And finally, why were the overwhelming majority of them male?!

Were it not for the fact that they were all nearly naked, or worse, it would have been a fascinating glimpse of the myriad of species the Impire boasted. Not just the Imps that flapped and swooped overhead, displaying every color and shade of the rainbow, but strange creatures Nate had never seen before. Simian men on simple gymnastics equipment effortlessly demonstrated their agility and flexibility. Creatures that looked like more gentle versions of the Satyr he'd seen were arrayed on soft blankets and posed in subtle ways that seemed to suggest tender sexuality. Things that looked like humanoid insects flexed and turned, showing off their shining carapaces. And thanks to the Imps, it seemed like they were indeed doing brisk business, as the women sitting next to the posing males were accepting coins from the numerous Imps that approached them and lead their chosen male away. He even saw an Imp leading back a male who looked a bit dazed, but pleased as he passed another coin to the lady holding his cashbox, who politely thanked the grinning Imp for his generosity.

Finally, Nate could take no more, and had to say something; he decided to turn to the member of the group he deemed most sane, Chiboom.

He noticed that although the orc didn't seem quite as comfortable as the two imps did, she wasn't anywhere near surprised, at best slightly tense. "Um... why are we here? I thought we were going to the markets?"

The warrior snorted as she looked down at the blushing male, "We are in the markets kid, this just happens to be the part where they sell... services, rather than goods. Trust me, I'd rather get to the armor too."

It was at this point that someone gently touched Nate's arm, and he whirled to find that he had wandered a little too close to one of the 'displays', and one of the prostitutes was trying to get his attention. He was one of the monkey men, and instead of posing as provocatively as the others, he simply stepped back and spread his arms, smiling gently at Nate in what was a clear offer. The young man gulped and gave the whore a smile that was as convincing as the one he'd given Zinoe. "Oh, sorry, I'm not... I don't... I mean you look fine! It's just...!" He was aware that he was digging himself into a hole with each word, but he'd never had experience in politely turning down a hooker and was suffering badly from the lack of schooling. Instead of being offended, however, the monkey man smiled sympathetically at him and held up a hand for silence. He rolled up his sleeves, and turned his hands back and forth to show he wasn't hiding anything, and then reached forward to pluck a large lotus flower from behind Nate's ear, which he gently handed to him with a smile and stepped back, clearly content to let Nate go on his way. Nate couldn't help but feel conflicted, not having expected such a soft-sell tactic, and was left holding the flower without quite knowing what to do with what amounted to pity from a hooker.

He panicked, and did the first thing that came to mind, he ran. He quickly caught up to the group, who had gone a small ways without him, catching Chiboom's attention. "Kid, don't wander off okay? You'll get lost easily around here, and I don't think you want that." Nate blushed and nodded, looking down to see that he was still holding the flower; he looked back to see the monkey-man wave to him politely, a gesture which he timidly returned before turning back around.

After a few moments, he heard sniggering and realized that Zericho was right next to him. "That's cute kid, I think you've got yourself an admirer." He plucked the flower out of his hand, "Honestly though, you might wanna work on your technique. Running away like that won't get you much action, as adorable as it may make you." He looked back up at the human, eyebrow raised in curiosity, "Seriously though, you aren't interested in me, you aren't interested in that guy back there? What's your problem, you ain't one of those..." Zericho struggled to spit out the word, "specieists,who only want to fuck their own kind, 'cause that's messed up."

Nate sputtered, "Um, hello, how could I not be? I grew up in a world where having sex with another species was always going to be beastiality, this is all kind of new to me. And besides..." he crossed his arms, "have you ever considered that I'm straight?"

Zericho was confused, "Straight? What, a straight shooter? Cause I don't see how skills with a bow and arrow determine who you bang."

Nate facepalmed, "No, heterosexual."

Zericho continued to look at Nate like he was speaking gibberish, "Okay, sex was somewhere in there."

Nate sighed, "Heterosexual means attracted only to members of the opposite sex, 'hetero' is Latin for differ-"

"Wait, wait, wait." Zericho quickly interrupted, "Are you trying to tell me, you only want to have sex with... women." The look on his face was one of... not quite horror, but closer to disbelief.

Nate struggled at what to say next, back on Earth, the answer would be obvious, 'Yes, of course', he would say. But here, there was no point in lying like that, it wouldn't prevent him from alienating anyone, in fact the lie would be more alienating. He supposed he might as well tell the truth. "Well... I don't know."

Zericho was still confused, "What do you mean, you don't know? I mean, I get that you're younger than me, but I knew I liked it up the ass way before I was 19. Once you get it on with someone, stuff like that is pretty easy to figure out."

Nate shook his head, still blushing, and Zericho could swear... starting to tear up? "Nevermind." He quickly made his way back to Chiboom, leaving Zericho with Zinoe.

Completely lost, Zericho looked at Zinoe, who was actually glaring sternly at him. The glowing Imp leaned in closer and spoke in a harsh whisper. "It is not good for your karma to torment an untested soul, brother..." He growled, and pointedly looked forward and flew faster.

Zericho spread his arms with a flabbergasted expression, clearly demanding the cosmos supply him with an answer for what the Hells he'd done wrong now.

Fortunately for Nate, they were close to the spell college now, and Zinoe assured him that they would soon have experts to consult on his unique situation. The human might have even felt hope as he saw the tall spires of the college getting closer, and perhaps he was cheered enough to ignore how suggestively shaped they all were. Well almost, the last one was so obvious a blind man could have seen it for what it was. Clearly annoyed with everyone and everything, Zericho had landed and angrily marched the rest of the way, pushing open the ornate doors that Chiboom and Nate had to duck under and standing boldly in the middle of the huge receiving room. Overhead and all around, Imps of all different colors swooped and flapped, regarding the visitors with curiosity. Zericho placed his hands on his hip and bellowed out. "Alright you wand-suckers! This is your Prince talking! I demand that whatever nigh-omnipotent fogey is in charge to remove himself from his apprentice's ass and get down here right now!"

Zinoe just folded his arms and seemed content to wait, and the sudden flurry of activity among the Imps suggested that they had taken his authority quite seriously, and it wasn't long before an Imp abruptly crashed at their feet, and slowly pushed himself up from the heap he'd landed in.

"I wasn't in his ass, you little brat!" He snapped, pointing a bony finger at Zericho. "I'm not so old I don't still like it under the tail, thank you!" The 'nigh-omnipotent fogey' in question was blue in coloration, and was thinner and more wrinkled than the other Imps that Nate had seen thus far, and his clothes seemed to be baggy robes, though it was hard to tell since he had put them back on so hastily.

As Nate idly wondered if there was any imp in existence who wasn't completely crude and sex obsessed, Zericho snapped back, "You!" He jabbed a finger at the head mage, "Get him!" He jabbed the finger at Nate, "Home! That is an order, from your prince, who may I remind you, is currently your acting ruler."

Nate was somewhat stunned, "Wait. So... just like this? It'll be this easy?"

The head mage scoffed at both of them, "Please, I can conjure up a transport spell easily. Just tell me where in Con'tihon, child."

"Um... sorry?" Nate was confused.

Zericho rolled his eyes, "Listen old man, this is a bit more complicated than that," He looked around to see that a large throng of imps had gathered to watch them, "Let's go somewhere there aren't a hundred people to listen in on us."

The head mage glared at the crowd, "Get out of here, the lot of you. Studies are still in session, and unless you all feel like being test subjects for our arriving class, I suggest you get back to them." He turned back towards the group, "Well come on, I don't have all day."

The four of them followed the old man back up a flight of majestic stairs, to a rather large, for an imp at least, door that read 'Archmage Zathoom'. They entered to find a cluttered room, one that stank of sulphur and musk, and was filled to the brim with various books and scrolls, as well as a few seats. In the middle of it all was a desk, atop which sat a pale green imp, in a state of hurried dress himself. "Maester Zathoom?"

Zathoom waved him off, "Get out of here brat, I'll let you know when I need your services again."

The imp, apparently accustomed to this treatment, nodded and quickly left the room. The old imp snorted as he closed the door behind him, "Nice kid, pity he couldn't cast his way out of a fight with a kitten. So what is it that you need, my royal pain?"

Zericho sighed and pointed to Nate, "He, is from some other realm or... something. All I know is that a transport spell went wrong, and he got dropped here as a result. I want you to fix that."

Zathoom rolled his eyes as he looked over the human, "Well which realm?"

Zericho shrugged, "What do you mean 'which', the one he's from!"

It was at this point that Zinoe piped in, "What the arch mage means, my prince, is that those few who were fortunate enough to view the vast, interconnecting web of realms that make up the threads of our reality, have said that the number was vast, nearly uncountable."

The prince looked unimpressed. "So? Just catch his scent or something. Trace his aura. Cast out for his home. I know you can find it!" He looked annoyed, and his wings kept flapping absently. This was partly due to his general impatience and partly because it was starting to smell like sending Nate home would not be as simple as he'd made it sound. The head mage smacked his forehead in an exaggerated fashion. "Of course! I wonder why I, with my many centuries of experience, didn't think to do any of that? Oh, right! Because it's still not going to be good enough!" He turned to Nate and gestured carelessly. "Then again, perhaps he doesn't care..." "Boy, how would you feel about landing in a world where everything is the same, except for the minor detail that water is blood and blood is water?" He asked in a mock-curious tone, "Maybe I'll land you in one where things fall up instead of down, or... maybe I land you in one that's perfectly fine... except you're already there."

Nate gulped, and lowered his head sadly, "I get what he's talking about. Back home, there are... theories about this kind of stuff, they say there could be an infinite number of universes. If he has no way of finding my home..." Nate trailed off and Zathoom nodded.

"Hm, the boy understands."

"So..." Nate looked at the arch mage wearily, "Is that it? I'm... just stuck here?"

Zathoom shook his head, "I never said that, it's just not going to be that simple is all."

"What do you mean?" Zericho asked, somewhat glad his promise to Nate might not be totally broken.

"In order for me to find where exactly the boy came from, I'd need to be where the spell was cast. The exact location. There I would be able to trace the path you made in the realm's fabric, see where it leads."

Nate was still cautious, "...and then I can go home?"

Zathoom nodded, "Most likely."

Zericho sighed, "Well kid, looks like you're going to be here for a while longer, but at least I've got another definite ally in this war."

Nate tilted his head in confusion, "What do you mean?"

Zericho chuckled, "The spell was cast in the capital, right in the royal palace. Guess where most of the demons in the empire are right now?"

Nate sighed as he lowered his head into his hands, "Fuck my life."