FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

Trapped in an endless cycle of excuses and answers, waiting for the one day when it will all be over. Looking up at the night sky, searching for the one answer I'm really looking for. I look down at the bright lights, the wondering people, the endless roads. Thunder fills my ears as lightning splits the sky in half as it starts to cry, concealing the tears I have shed. Screams of anger mix with the roar of thunder. Each battling one another to be louder then the other.

I close my eyes, my mind slowly drifting towards the world of shadows as my left hand moves to my right shoulder. With every angry word spat out another scar is left on my back. The voices seam to die down, but are replaced with sounds of slamming doors. Door after door, slam after slam, bone after bone, braking in my body. My eyes clench shut as I endure all this pain, till finally, its over, at least.....for the time being.

Footsteps are heard as I feel a presence sit next to me.

"Why do you put up with all this?" my new companion asks. "You know you don't deserve any of this."

"I do have to put up with it and you damn well know that." I answer back with venom in my tone.

The flick of a lighter is heard as I hear him inhale, followed by the smell of smoke. "I know, but it doesn't hurt to just put it out there."

"No matter how many times you say it, it will never happen."

My companion laughs as he takes another drag of his cigarette. "You need to man up and spread your wings, fly into the void and never look back." I just sigh and stay quite. He lets out an angry growl as he gets up and starts to pace. "Instead you clip your own wings and stay here for there sake, even though it's killing you."

Tears fill my eyes as I sit there. "You know I want to go so bad, but I can't do it, at least, not yet."

I hear his footsteps come behind me as I feel a hand on my head and feel fingers intertwine with my hair. "Well you better make it fast, because if you never let your wings grow you'll never fly..." he pulls my hair, pulling me back and lets go as my back hits the concrete roof. I look up and see nothing but the night sky as my face gets kissed by the raindrops "then you'll regret being grounded."

I give out a little chuckle and a sad smile as I lift my hand to my mouth, inhaling the cigarette and keeping its air in my lungs for a while before exhaling. "And we wouldn't want that now would we?"

I put out the cigarette before I get up and fix my now drenched body. I walk to the door of the building and open it, taking one last look behind me before entering the building. "See you around..."

I turn around and enter the building as the door slowly closes, my companion lightly laughing, his voice a whisper as the door closes and locks. "Only in the mirror."