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Corwin Hall, Chapter 14

Todd stirred on the crib, pushing the sheets off of himself in his sleep. He didn't wake Lisa, who was curled against him, but she rolled over onto her other side and faced the bars. His breathing quickened, and he began to kick his feet in small circles. Above him, the bright moon shone against the white drapes in the window.

Todd had moved out of his quarters earlier that evening to stay with Lisa. The move itself was a formality, really; he had no personal effects to bring over. They had, at Lisa's insistence, moved the painting of the rapt Mouse boy with his model garden, and it now hung on the wall above the crib. Underneath it, Todd's eyes flew open.

He saw only colors. Shards of bright hues drifted past his vision, and he felt like he was floating. He turned his head left and right, but the field of color was everywhere. Slowly - Todd had no idea if it was a minute or an hour - the shards began to shrink and move, resolving into broad, flat shapes that seemed almost recognizable. It was a room, grey and featureless. The smooth surfaces divided, changing hue as they did, and formed details. The room was stone, but not mortared, hewn into the rocky earth itself. A shape began to form from the moving shards along one wall - a box? No, a cell. A cage.

Todd was standing in a dark room, like a cellar. He realized, though, that he was not actually standing there; he wasn't anywhere. Still, he continued to observe the room. The cage was about ten feet to a side, and built into the wall. The only illumination came from two shafts of sunlight shining through windows high up on the same wall as the cage, just below the ceiling. Wherever this dungeon was, it was not entirely underground.

Inside the cage was a bed, thick and soft, with white linen sheets. It did not look like it belonged there. Todd heard a groan, and realized that a Wolf, perhaps in his mid-twenties, was lying on the bed. Had he been there before? The Wolf was lean, ragged, and ratty. He had two strips of gauze taped to his face, under his eyes, and a large bandage wrapped around his midsection. He gave another groan, and writhed his legs, but he didn't seem capable of much movement.

Todd watched this scene for a while, but once again he couldn't tell if it was a minute or an hour before a thick oaken door opened in the wall, and a tall, tan Rabbit with floppy ears stepped through. The Rabbit was carrying a tray with a small plate on it. He walked to the cage, opened it with a large key, then entered and closed the door behind him. He set the tray on a small table by the wall, and sat on the edge of the bed.

The Wolf opened his eyes and looked up at the Rabbit, then cringed and tried to scoot away. He spasmed, though, and clenched his paws to his belly. The Rabbit looked down at the twisting Wolf for a long moment.

"I don't know what to do," he said.

"Lord Rabbit..." The Wolf's voice was slow and hitching.

"Don't call me that."

"But you are a lord," the Wolf choked. "I saw... I saw you on the hill."

"Just call me Geraden."

"Geraden... what's going to happen to me?"

Geraden leaned down and started removing the tape on the Wolf's face. He spoke with an even voice. "I always kill the Enemy. I always have to. My people - my family - need me to. And then I go back... back to wherever I go, and I return when the whole horrible thing starts over. But now the Enemy is here, defeated, and I can't kill him. They won't let me, and they're right not to. But I don't know what to do."

"Sir. Geraden, I don't understand. Am I the enemy? What are you going to do to me?" The Wolf winced as Geraden pulled the gauze off his face. There were two wounds under the bandages, fresh and bleeding. Todd thought that he knew someone with wounds like that, but he didn't remember who - it was foggy.

"Are you hungry?" Geraden asked.

"Yes, sir."

"Then I will feed you, Arvetis," the Rabbit said, straightforward. He picked up a strip of meat from the plate and held it to Arvetis's nose. The Wolf smelled it, then ate it gingerly from Geraden's paw. Todd could smell it, smoky and savory. He'd tasted that, a long time ago, in another life.

"Dumb rabbit," Arvetis said around the mouthful, and swallowed.

"I will ask you," Geraden said, his voice hardening, "not to specify 'dumb' in my presence."

Arvetis pinned his ears back and said nothing.

Geraden fed Arvetis the last remaining strips of Rabbit meat, then wiped his paw on the side of the bed.

"Rooliti says your organs are fine. I didn't pierce your... something, I don't know. Did you know he was training to be a medic when the Secret Police picked him up?"

"He's here?" Arvetis perked his ears up.

"Yes. He examined you while you were unconscious. You shouldn't have any problems digesting, but if you do, let someone know."

"Can I see him?"

"No."

Arvetis flattened his ears. "What... what's he told you? About me?"

"Nothing I didn't already know." Geraden took some new gauze out from a pocket on his vest and began applying it to the Wolf's face. "Your feeding might be irregular for a little while. Skander snared these rabbits outside the city. We don't have any meat supplies on hand here, but I've called one of my contacts in the north. They have Predators in the Resistance up there, and we can set up a small provisions exchange." The Rabbit paused. "I'm also looking for a supplier of adult diapers."

Arvetis turned his head on the pillow, facing away from Geraden. "I was only wearing one for the journey. I didn't know when I'd be able to stop."

"Don't ever lie to me again." Geraden's voice stayed soft. Arvetis lay still on the bed

"Roo told you," he moaned lowly.

"No. He's remained quite faithful to you in that regard, even now. I was in your quarters yesterday afternoon." Arvetis turned his head, staring at the Rabbit with wide eyes.

"Where?"

"Under your bed," Geraden said.

"You mean... when I -"

"Yes. Let's not get into detail, shall we?" Geraden picked up the tray and walked towards the cage door. He unlocked it and stepped out.

"You mean..." Arvetis's voice cracked. "You mean, even if I'd killed him, it would have gotten out? People would have known?"

Geraden looked over his shoulder. "It would seem that way." He stood in the doorway to the cell and watched the Wolf.

Arvetis fell silent for a long time. When he spoke again, his voice was quiet. "Thank you. Thank you for stopping me. But I don't need them - diapers. You don't have to give them to me."

Geraden shut the door and locked it. "I think you do." He turned and walked back out the heavy oaken door.

***

The colors returned, saturating the scene and obscuring it. Again, they slowly combined and turned to form an image, but this time there was only a Rabbit. Todd recognized her - Elyssa. The colors around her faded to a dull grey, and she seemed to float in a featureless void. Eventually, the grey next to her darkened, forming a shape.

It was some kind of Sentient, but it had no color or detail. It was only a shadow, tall and thin. It gesticulated at Elyssa, and shouted something. Elyssa shouted back, stepping forward and thrusting her muzzle at the shape. The sound was like an underwater recording, mute and garbled.

The shape stumbled back from Elyssa clumsily, then lashed out, striking her face. She fell, but with no floor to hit, she only tumbled through the grey, screaming.

***

The grey fractured, but did not return to shards of color before re-forming as stone walls, lit again by two shafts of sun. Todd was back in the cage room, but the lighting was different. It must have been a different time. Maybe a different day, or a different year.

The Wolf was curled on the floor of the cage, leaning against the bars and hanging one arm out. In front of him, a short Rabbit stood, milky white, with large spots of brown. The Rabbit was wearing a dark green camouflage vest and pants, and carrying a large duffel bag. Arvetis was staring at the Rabbit's feet, his shoulders hitching. Todd realized he was sobbing.

The Rabbit turned and walked away from the cage.

"Rooliti!" Arvetis called after him, his voice weak. The Rabbit did not stop. "Roo!" The Wolf slumped against the bars.

Roo walked to Geraden, who was leaning in the door to the dungeon. The smaller Rabbit's face was grim. "There's... more to him than what he's done," he said. "I think."

"He wouldn't be alive if there wasn't," Geraden replied. Roo nodded, and turned to leave, but Geraden slid in front of him. "Rooliti... if anyone were to find out Arvetis is here, he wouldn't be the only one to hang."

"I won't tell a soul, Gel-Herathin." Roo nodded his head deferentially.

"I know I can trust you on that." Geraden smiled and extended his paw, and Roo shook it. "Good luck finding your family, Roo."

"Thank you, Gel-Herathin. I owe you so much." The smaller rabbit hiked the duffel bag up on his back and disappeared through the dark passage without looking back. Arvetis gave a loud hitch.

Geraden strode up to the cell door. "Back," he commanded. Arvetis pushed against the bars, sliding on the stone floor and drawing his legs up in the center of the cell. Todd saw that, under his white linen robe, the Wolf was diapered. Geraden opened the cell and entered; he didn't bother closing the door behind him.

"Did you expect him to stay and be your pet?" he asked, standing over the Wolf.

"No," Arvetis croaked. "I asked him to forgive me."

Geraden kneeled, offering his paw, and helped the Wolf stand. He led him over to the bed, and laid him out on it.

"He doesn't," the Rabbit said flatly.

"I know. And if he doesn't, nobody will."

Geraden began changing the bandages on the Wolf's face again. Todd saw that the marks had begun to heal - Arvetis no longer winced as the gauze was removed. It had been several days since the first vision, then.

"That may not be true," Geraden said. "But it will not come cheaply."

"How can I work for it in here?" Arvetis closed his eyes and let the Rabbit work.

"I don't think you can. Not yet. The six of us don't trust you. We had families, you know. I still have parents, staying with the Northern Resistance. I'm the only one."

Arvetis moaned as Geraden applied a yellowish liquid to his scars. "I am sorry."

"Yes, you are, aren't you?" Geraden picked up a strip of gauze. "That's the hell of it, really. How can someone do the things that you did one day," the Rabbit held a bandage to Arvetis's face, "and be sorry about it the next?"

Arvetis flinched a little as Geraden taped new gauze onto his face. "It was a very long day. May I ask you something?"

"Go ahead." The Rabbit finished and stood.

"Why haven't you killed me yet?" Arvetis sat up on the bed.

Geraden sighed. "The simple answer is that three Tigers told me not to. I think I'm also curious about you, though. This is a new situation for me. It's been... a long time since I've been in a new situation."

Arvetis seemed satisfied by this. "And the others?"

"They're beginning to see me for who I am. They'll follow my lead." Geraden stepped back through the cell door and latched it. "Are you thirsty?"

Arvetis nodded.

"I'll bring water." He turned and left.

***

Elyssa again. There was no field of grey this time. Her surroundings were as real as she was, and as grim.

She was strapped, spread-eagle, to a stainless steel table. The tile room was lit by harsh fluorescent light that made her tawny fur look dingy. Her head was drenched, and a thin sheet of water spread across the floor. A small cooler, overflowing with water and chunks of ice, sat next to the table.

"Enjoying our in-house pool, food?" a dark-furred Ferret asked. He circled the table, running a finger along the edge. "Would food like to go for another swim?"

Elyssa sputtered. Her eyes were clenched. "Go fuck yourself."

"Food said something interesting between dips," the Ferret hissed. "Does food remember?"

Elyssa writhed her head from side to side. She pulled against the leather restraints, but they were fast.

"What is a Touchstone?" the Ferret asked. "Where do they have it?"

Elyssa moaned.

***

And Todd was in the dungeon again. As bleak as it was, Todd was grateful. He never wanted to see that tile room again.

There may have been other places between them, other scenes, but Todd wasn't sure. If there were, he hadn't been able to hold onto them. This place, though, was beginning to feel like home. Even still, the familiar surroundings had changed. The bed in the cell had been replaced with a wider, less institutional-looking one. There was a table in the corner, piled with books. Another table, outside the cell, had a radio and a pack of playing cards. Arvetis was standing just inside the door to the cell, dressed neatly in clean denim jeans and a khaki shirt. He was holding something in his paws - a hunk of yellow metal.

"The meeting has been arranged?" he asked.

"Yes," a small, white rabbit replied. He stood next to a tall, dark-furred rabbit with proud ears. Todd thought they must be Hanze and Skander. "Tonight, if anyone shows up, they'll be at the fortress ruins."

"I still think you should reconsider the name," Skander said. "The Contrite Order? It sounds a little... I dunno. Cultish."

Arvetis ignored him. He looked to Geraden, standing outside the door of the cell, then cast his eyes down. "Seven years," he said, "and I never asked you. Now I have to."

Geraden nodded, a look of relief on his face.

"Please, Warkyn-rah, let me out."

Geraden turned a key in the cell door and opened it. Arvetis took a hesitating step forward.

"What name will you use?" Geraden asked.

Arvetis didn't seem to hear him at first. He took a few more steps, coming into the center of the dungeon room. He looked up at Geraden. "I don't know. I hadn't thought about it."

"Well, you can't go around calling yourself Arvetis Agathos." A mischievous grin crossed his face. "How about Philosparganon?"

Arvetis cracked a smile at that. "Isn't that a little... obvious?"

"Who cares about ancestral Wolfish anymore?" Geraden asked. "Even the UPN only used the catchier slogans. Besides, 'sparganon' has a few meanings."

Arvetis looked up to the ceiling in a look of amused surrender. "Philosparganon it is." He held up the metal in his paws, and his face became grim again. "Philosparganon," he repeated. He placed the metal over his face; it was a mask. The smooth bronze was shaped like the upper half of a wolf head. It did not decorate, only disguised. The metal stretched from the tips of his ears to the tops of his cheekbones, leaving his healed scars as the only visible identifying features on his face. His head looked half-statue, like an avatar.

"Good luck, Arvetis," Geraden said. "Come back to us, or I'll find you." His look was not harsh, though, and his tone was soft.

Arvetis wrapped an arm around Geraden and laid his head on the Rabbit's shoulder. "Where else would I go?" he breathed. He broke the embrace, then walked towards the door to the dungeon. The mask hid his expression, but Todd could tell he was terrified. He looked over his shoulder. "I'll be back by dawn."

At that moment, Todd's vision changed more drastically than it had before. He saw the entire continent spread out below him, with tiny people fighting and dying and celebrating. It looked like a carving. He saw an army of penitents rise from the Florida peninsula, spreading across the land. They re-built, and they healed, and sometimes they fought their own. They bore the will and the marks of the Wolf whose name they cursed, and they never knew it. When they filled the space between the oceans, they moved north and south. Todd saw little fragments of the mass split off, traveling across the seas like spores, landing in distant countries and growing. Sometimes they achieved their aims, and the land grew a little healthier. Often they did not, but there were enough of them that they didn't stop. Todd saw a dozen would-be tyrants, like knots in the carving, rise up, then fall, choked by the masses. Once or twice, the fallen persecutors joined the throng.

After what felt like hours, Todd closed his eyes. He realized he had eyes to close. He felt warm sheets, and a soft figure next to him, breathing slowly. He tried to sit up.

As soon as he moved, he felt something grab him. It was icy, like frozen vines wrapped around his shoulders. His eyes flew open again, and the colors were back, harsh and saturated. He reached out to touch them, to push them away, and they went black.

***

"God damn it, Lisa, get away from the window."

No, Todd begged, voiceless. Not this.

"It's a brick wall, Todd. What's it going to do, take a picture?"

"It's a brick wall and an alley. What if someone sees you?"

"If someone sees me, they'll think 'gee, look, a stranger in a diaper.'"

"They'd think you're weird, Lisa. They'd wonder what poor sap lives with you. You want to do that to me?"

"You're such a pig sometimes, Todd."

"Will you just get over here?"

"Get your paws off me! Just for one second, will you not act like an idiot about this? Just once? Please... Todd."

Get your paws off her, Todd repeated.

"Jesus, Lisa, I'm just looking out for you. Do you realize how far gone you'd be if I didn't? A crib, Lisa? A fucking crib? What if Nicole saw, huh? You're trying to get a recommendation from her father. What would she think?"

"It's none of her business."

"She'd think you were soft in the head. Weak. She'd think you couldn't handle a kid."

"Weak? Is that what you think, Todd? You think I'm weak?" The first catch in her voice. Todd knew she was in the corner, leaning on the counter.

"What else do you call this? Look at yourself. And it's spreading. How long has it been since you had a job?"

"The adoption agency won't consider us with two full-time workers. You know that." She was sinking now, Todd remembered, her back against the wall.

"That's going to happen, Lisa. That's really going to happen, if they show up to inspect the place, and find your pissy diapers all over the house, and a God-damn king size crib in the bedroom. Nuh-uh. No adoption, so you're getting a job. And you're going to stop this. I can't have it in my life."

"I can't. Not like this." The thunk was her head coming to rest against the cabinet.

The jingle of keys. "I'm getting a hotel. When I come back, the diapers are gone. Or... you are."

"Todd!"

The door squealed as it opened. "It's for your own good, baby. I know you'll make the right choice."

She did, Todd thought as the door slammed.

Then he was awake, gasping and sweating. He sat up, listening to his breath and twisting the blanket in his paws. Slowly, he became aware that his was not the only breathing he could hear. He opened his eyes.

Lisa was backed into a corner of the crib, staring at him.

"Every word," she said.

"Lisa... I was dreaming." Todd leaned towards her. She flinched.

"Four months ago, and you remember every word. Do you repeat them to yourself?"

"No! Lisa... I'm sorry!" Todd felt himself start to cry. "I don't remember them. I was dreaming."

"Get out."