The Furside: Pilot by Grey Silvertail

Fade in: The Furside: Furry Comics and Items.

Enter the shop. There's a guy browsing the Brony section and another guy behind the counter reading Popular Science. Another man comes in with a big fed-ex box.

Man: "The new tails are in!"

The guy behind the counter sets the magazine down: "Really? Move over, let me see!"

Man: "Easy Sirius, it's only the first dozen or so, the others aren't due until Tuesday."

Newly identified Sirius: "I hope they're the Fox Tails. What do you think they are?"

Man: "I think they're the Cat Tails."

Sirius: "Damn Grey. Why do people always buy the Cat Tails, they must be our hottest sellers."

Grey: "Perhaps because most of the Furs that've been in lately have been retrofitting them into other costumes, they are the most bushy after the Squirrel Tails. Remember that gal who made a Cat Tail into a Squirrel Tail?"

Sirius: "Yeah yeah, but they are also the cheapest."

Grey: "Well then that explains it. Pass me the box cutter will ya?"

Sirius passes the box cutter, Grey opens the box revealing that they are indeed the Cat Tails.

Grey: "Told you. Now put these up, I've got a special order to make."

Sirius takes the Tails and walks over to the tail rack. Grey sits down at the counter and logs into the shop computer.

Grey: "Which site do you think would be best for Engagement Collars?"

Sirius shrugs: "Not a clue, just ask our usual Collar guys."

Grey: "Righty ho!"

The guy browsing the Brony section asks: "Do you guys do Pony Dolls?"

Sirius: "Yeah, you've been looking at them and the plushies for the last hour now."

Brony guy: "No I meant Pony Dolls."

Grey: "What kind of a shop do you think this is? We don't do that kind of stuff here."

Brony guy: "Do you know where I can find a place that does?"

Sirius: "No, I'm afraid not. If you try the adult section you might find a couple of 'Zines with Ponies in them."

Brony guy: "No thanks. I'll just take the Rainbow Dash plushie and be on my way."

Grey: "I'll ring you up, that'll be seven fifty."

Brony guy hands over the money: "Bit pricey isn't it?"

Grey: "They cost us five apiece after shipping, feel lucky they don't cost ten."

Brony guy laughs and leaves.

Sirius: "It's freaks like him that give Bronies like you a bad name."

Grey: "Yeah but what can you do? Everyone has their fetishes, some are just a bit creepier than others."

Sirius: "What you mean like you and Pregnancy?"

Grey: "That's not really creepy is it? I mean the end goal of sex is pregnancy so I guess after it's done you're just admiring your work. It probably stems from some sort of primordial urge to propagate the species."

Sirius: "Ah, so it's perfectly natural then. But you take it to a creepier level, something about the way you watch it just screams "I wish that was me!" it's not right."

Grey: "I'll remember to control myself a bit more in the future."

Sirius: "Good. We could use some more Wolf Ears."

Grey: "Already done."

The door opens and a bell dings. A young woman walks in.

Young woman: "Hey Grey, Sup Sirius?"

Sirius: "Heyya Slips, what can I do ya for?"

Slips: "I need some more of that Electric Lime FS Fabric for Derry."

Grey: "We've got another fifteen yards in the back but after that we'll have to order more."

Slips: "That's fine, I only really need five yards or so."

Grey: "Okay, you just want the five yards or do you want to take all of it?"

Slips: "I'd better take all of it just to be safe."

Grey: "I'll fetch it. How's Kep doing?"

Slips: "Kep's fine, he's just having a really hard time after Draco left him."

Grey: "Why did Draco leave him? Those two were great together."

Slips: "Draco wanted to settle down but Kep wasn't ready. After a year or so of Kep not stepping up Draco finally said "Step up and commit or I'm leaving." Kep didn't step up and Draco left."

Sirius: "Good for him, standing up for himself like that."

Slips: "I love Kep but Draco was right, Kep needed to be a man and commit."

Grey: "We accept the love we think we deserve, we give the love we think we ought to."

Sirius: "Cut the poetic shit Grey, Just say what you mean to say."

Grey: "I'm incredibly lonely and I would kill for that kind of disappointment because then at least I'd have a memory I could hang onto as opposed to the emptyness that now consumes my heart."

Slips: "Holy Christ Grey."

Sirius: "He's never had a real relationship. Just leave him be and we won't have to hear his sob story of "No one's ever loved me." Jesus man, get off it and go out on a date or something!"

Grey: "We can't all have your self confidence Sirius."

Sirius: "No but you can't have less than no self confidence like you do either."

Grey: "Slips, do you think there's anything wrong with my lack of self confidence?"

Slips: "No, not really."

Sirius: "Is that a yes or a no?"

Slips: "That was a yes Sirius."

Grey: "Why?"

Slips: "Because if you have no self confidence in either direction it can have a much worse effect than having negative self confidence."

Grey: "Well it's a good thing I don't pay the two of you to sit around and listen to my problems. What did you need Slips?"

Slips: "My FS Fabric?"

Grey: "Oh, right."

Grey ducks into the back and fetches the cloth.

Sirius: "You actually think there's nothing seriously wrong with that loser?"

Slips: "He has the makings of a great man, he just needs a little nudge in the right direction."

Sirius chuckles: "If you say so."

Grey returns with the fabric "Twenty even. I took five off because I owe Derry for lunch Thursday."

Slips: "Why don't you try to get a girlfriend?"

Sirius: "Because he thinks that he's the most worthless piece of shit to ever have lived."

Slips: "Is that true?"

Grey: "Yes."

Slips: "I can't believe I've never seen this side of you before, how long have we known each other? Three years?"

Grey: "Two years seven months and fifteen days. I keep it hidden."

Slips: "Nevermind, you don't need a girlfriend you need a psychiatrist."

Grey: "I already have one."

Slips: "What's he say?."

Grey: "Not much, he mostly just listens."

Slips: "Sounds like he doesn't do a very good job."

Grey: "He does okay, I just take a little time to adapt to match what he says I need to do."

Slips: "That works. Makes more sense."

Grey: "Okay now go tell Derry that the next meeting will be at DG."

Slips: "Will do. Anything else?"

Grey: "Will's eyes are in."

Slips: "I'll run them right over, where are they?"

Grey: "I put them under the fabric."

Slips: "Okay, see you guys later."

Grey: "Okay."

Slips walks out.

Grey: "I wonder if Game night is an appropriate place to ask the guys what they think about going to ComicCon next year."

Sirius: "Dude, what is it with you?"

Grey: "What?"

Sirius shakes his head then picks up his magazine: "Either you're a sociopath or you really are a great man in waiting."

Grey: "I suppose we'll soon find out which."

Sirius: "I don't want to be there when we find out."

Grey chuckles: "I very much doubt I'm either."

Sirius gives him a funny look: "You're a loony."

Grey: "Only in the sack."

Sirius: "You're a virgin."

Grey: "I am not, I've had sex once."

Sirius: "Who with?"

Grey: "I don't kiss and tell."

Sirius: "You don't kiss at all."

Grey sighs: "You know that preteen girl that comes in here all the time?"

Sirius: "Yeah, I think her name is Amy or something."

Grey: "Amberle, she's my daughter."

Sirius: "No fucking way."

Grey: "She is."

Sirius: "Since when?"

Grey: "December Fourteenth Twenty Fourteen, Eight Fifty Three PM."

Sirius: "Bullshit."

Grey: "No, really."

Sirius: "How?"

Grey: "The usual way? Doggystyle I think-?"

Sirius: "You tell her that?"

Grey: "No. Her mother did. She'll tell anyone with an ear about "the magical night the twins were conceived" I think she thinks of it as the high point in her life to tell you the truth."

Sirius: "If you were the high point of her life I feel sorry for her."

Grey: "I lied, I was never one to do that sort of thing."

Sirius: "I fucking knew it!"

Grey: "Seriously though I have two kids, who's mother doesn't hate me but doesn't exactly want me around either."

Sirius: "And I'm the queen of Barbados."

Grey pulls out his wallet: "See for yourself."

Sirius takes the proffered pictures of Grey's family: "Lies! All Lies!"

Grey: "That's my son Gregory Thaddeus the second and my daughter Amberle Rose and our dog Lucky on our last family vacation to Flagstaff, that's my daughter and I at Steamcon V, another of us at RainFurrest. That's me and my son riding last year, real fond memories that, my daughter and I at Rose City Comic Con, and that's my daughter holding Lucky as a puppy."

Sirius: "Okay, let's say this is legit, and I'm not saying it is, but let's say it is."

Grey: "Okay?"

Sirius: "Why let us think that you're a lonely trainwreck?"

Grey: "I am a lonely trainwreck."

Sirius: "You are a sociopath."

Grey: "No, just really really bored."

Sirius: "But I've known you for seven years and I've never seen any clues about you having a family."

Grey: "They're everywhere, hell Amberle brought me dinner last week, you're just to blazed out of your mind all the time to notice."

Sirius: "Then why hasn't Slips noticed?"

Grey: "Why didn't you?."

Sirius: "You have to have the strangest family I've ever heard of."

Grey Smiles: "You haven't met my son yet."

Sirius: "I don't know if I want to."

Grey: "You'll like him, he's just nice enough to be a good person and just mean enough to get on your nerves. The deadliest combo, he gets it from me."

Sirius: "Whatever, I'm gonna go take a nap."

Fade out.

The Furside: Powernaps by Grey Silvertail and Sirius Silverback.

Fade in: The Furside Storefront. Grey unlocks the door and prepares for the day, begin two hour time lapse.

End two hour time lapse. Sirius walks in, stoned with Funnyuns.

Sirius: "You got here early."

Grey: "No, you're two hours late again, did you at least remember to buy our lunch?"

Sirius: "It's my day to do lunch?"

Grey: "How baked are you right now?"

Sirius, stares for a couple moments: "What?"

Grey: "You're totally frakkin' torched, go take a Powernap in the stock room, I can't have you around the customers in this state."

Sirius: "Aye Aye Cap'n" He walks into the stockroom giving the Fuck You Salute.

Grey shakes his head. Begin another time lapse, three hours, during which Grey makes a few sales and what appears to be a drug deal. As the time lapse stops one of Grey's suppliers comes in.

Grey: "Wierman! You got my stuff?"

Wierman: "Six crates of Furplay and two Playfurs. I also brought some Blank Tags."

Grey: "We're full up on Tags, you always bring three boxes of the things whenever you come in."

Wierman: "No tags then, gotcha. What about Collars?"

Grey: "We could use some Collars, have you got any StarStuds?"

Wierman: "Yeah, I've got a few."

Sirius re-emerges from the stockroom: "Queerman! What's up man?"

Wierman: "Dropping off the Porno Mags."

Sirius: "Sweet dude."

Wierman: "What's up with you guys?"

Grey: "I went to dinner and a movie with a blind date, it went about as badly as you'd expect."

Wierman: "I know, everyone knows, it's kind of the talk of the town."

Sirius: "What happened?"

Wierman: "Absolutely nothing, they just ate and watched a movie, it was probably the single most spectacularly boring date in history."

Sirius: "That sounds like Grey."

Grey: "We both agreed that we should never see each other again."

Sirius: "Must have been really bad sex."

Grey: "We didn't have sex."

Sirius: "Exactly."

Wierman: "Everyone agrees that you two are perfect for each other."

Grey: "We don't."

Sirius: "I don't either, I think they're both dorks though. Who was she?"

Wierman: "Yeah, you're right there. Her name was Issabelle."

Sirius: "Thank you Queerman."

Wierman: "Why do you call me that?"

Sirius: "Cause I'm trying to imply something there."

Wierman: "I'm not gay."

Sirius: "Whatever you have to tell yourself to go to sleep at night."

Wierman: "Grey, back me up here."

Grey: "Sorry, if I team up with you he'll turn on me too and unlike you I don't get to leave whenever I want."

Sirius: "Exactly, I've got him trained."

Grey: "Go unload the Porno Mags."

Sirius: "Go fuck yourself while you unload them."

Grey: "Hey. I'm the owner of this establishment now do as I say or you're fired."

Sirius flips Grey off : "Aye Aye Cap'n Dickweed!"

Wierman: "Why do you keep him around?"

Grey: "He's cheap labor."

Wierman: "Yeah but is he worth it?"

Grey: "Yeah, he's good with most things and he also hasn't done what I told him to do yet so he's still standing right next to you."

Wierman looks at Sirius who swats him with a rolled up porno mag: "Bad Queerman."

Grey: "Do your damned job or I'll find someone else who will."

Sirius: "No you won't, you love me."

Grey: "Babs is looking for a new job, I like her more than I like you."

Sirius: "Well then Hire her too."

Grey: "I can only afford two underlings."

Sirius: "Then make her partner, we could use another woman's touch."

Wierman: "Burn!"

Grey: "Shut up."

Wierman: "What? It was a burn."

Grey: "Just go wait in the break room."

Wierman heads into the break room as Sirius brings in the boxes of magazines.

Sirius: Where's Queerman?"

Grey: "In the break room. Put the mags in the Adult section, I'll see to them."

Sirius: "I'll bet you will you disgusting pervert."

Grey: "Just do what I tell you."

Sirius takes them into the Adult section then gives Grey a stern look before heading into the break room. Grey opens the boxes and begins to sort the magazines when Slips walks in.

Slips: "Where're Wierdman and Sirius?"

Grey: "In the breakroom."

Slips: "Listen, Grey, I was talking to Morris and he wants to reconsider that merger."

Grey: "Oh?"

Slips: "Yeah, it sounds like he's about to go under."

Grey: "You think He's serious?"

Slips: "Yeah."

Grey: "I'll schedule a meeting."

Slips: "He said next tuesday."

Grey: "That works."

Slips: "What'll you offer him?"

Grey: "An oughtright buyout."

Slips: "Sounds great."

Grey: "I can't trust him with a straight merger."

Slips: "Don't we all know it."

Grey: "Your turn for lunch."

Slips: "I couldn't think of a better place than KFC at the moment."

Grey chuckles: "Neither could I. Get everything, take it out of the petty cash."

Wierman: "Extra popcorn chicken."

Slips: "You know it."

Grey: "Hurry the hell up, I'll make it worth your while."

Slips: "Will do!"

Slips leaves, Grey heads into the breakroom.

Wierman: "What game you guys want?"

Sirius: "Battlefield?"

Grey: "Colonial Marines?"

Wierman: "I wanted Forza."

Grey: "I could go for a race."

Sirius: "I'll just pwn you at that too."

Wierman: "I doubt it."

Grey: "How about Games Roulette?"

Siruis: "Okay."

Grey: "Where'd you put the cap gun?"

Sirius: "It should be on the wall next to the game shelf."

Grey retrieves the cap gun and loads some caps into it and fires four off: "Standard rules, whoever lives get's to choose. I'll go first."

Grey lives, Sirius lives, Wierman lives, Grey Dies, Wierman lives, Sirius Lives, Wierman Dies.

Grey: "Battlefield it is."

Sirius: "Na, we'll play Colonial Marines, prepare to be raped."

Grey: "You can't play xeno, every time you do you are unable to- hey Greg's on, he's playing Bioshock, you guys want to?"

Sirius: "Hell no, if your son got his gaming skills from you I'll never stop racking up the points."

Grey: "I'm the boss, I'm inviting him."

Sirius "You're the gay."

Wierman: "Hang on Grey, you're telling me that GregRorschach77842 is your son?"

Grey: "Yeah."

Wierman: "But he's a really good player and you're just kind of mediocre."

Sirius: "No, he's shit."

Grey: "My playing skills are about slightly above average, Greg's on the other hand are well above average, I think he get's it from his sister, CuteFuzMcMurder."

Wierman: "Wait a second, you have a daughter?"

Grey: "I do, and a father and a dog and a house."

Wierman: "I've known you for years and never heard about this."

Sirius: "Yeah, he was just fucking with us."

Wierman: "For three years?"

Sirius: "Seven for me."

Grey: "Yeah, I'm bored basically all the time, I pull this stuff just for the hell of it."

Wierman: "So you fuck with us for seven years?"

Grey: "Pretty much."

Wierman: "Fucked up dude."

Grey: "Meh."

Wierman: "You know, you seem like the kind of guy to do exactly that sort of thing."

Sirius: "Are we gonna play or what?"

Grey: "Yeah."

Fade out.

Grey: "Damn it Sirius!"

To be continued.

The Furside: The Gerbils, Powernaps Part Two, by Grey Silvertail and Sirius Silverback.

Fade in: The Furside parking lot.

Slips is fumbling with the KFC at the door. When she finally rests it open she drops the bucket, nothing falls out, she picks it up awkwardly. We follow her inside, she set's everything down on the counter and lays it out then waits. After a few moments we hear Sirius from the breakroom.

Sirius: "Chicken!"

They file out and begin making their plates, Grey receives a phone call.

Grey: "Yaggalablow?-He did what?-Well of course he did, he's a teenage boy! He's going to explore himself in that way.-No! He needs to make his own mistakes just give them their privacy.-They'll be fine, he's a smart kid, they'll practice safety.-Well yes he should have it, it passes from father to son.-Well if that happens we'll take care of it. If we don't give them their freedom they'll resent us forever, whatever choices they make they'll make with or without our permission. Better with than without.-Why don't you just come over here?-No it's cool, I told them.-No, they didn't believe me.-Just come over, I have a little surprise for you.-Okay see ya in a little bit.-You too, bye now."

Slips: "Let me guess, your sister?"

Sirius: "No, his secret wife."

Slips: "Yeah right, I gotta go, Babs called and apparently Ferris is in some kind of bind. I'll catch up with you guys later."

Slips grabs a few items then ducks out the door before anyone can say anything.

Grey: "Yeah, my ex is coming over in about ten minutes."

Sirius: "If she is your wife. She's probably your neighbor."

Grey: "I don't have any neighbors."

Wierman: "Where do you live?"

Grey: "Wouldn't you like to know?"

Sirius: "He just said he would!"

Grey: "Shut up and eat."

Sirius: "You'd like that wouldn't you?"

Wierman: "I would."

Sirius: "Shut up Queerman."

Wierman: "Whatever. I'm going to go tuck into this pot pie and contemplate the best way to pwn you."

Grey: "It's not about the pwnage it's the rivalry and fun time you have doing it."

Sirius: "That's the gayest response I've ever heard."

Grey: "Just shut up and eat."

Sirius: "I will but not because you told me to."

Wierman: "Yeah, it's because you've got the fucking munchies!"

Sirius: "You're goddamned right I do. Pineapple Derby is some strong shit!"

Grey: "I thought I told you to quit smoking that shit."

Sirius: "You know I'll never listen."

Grey: "Doesn't mean I can't talk."

Sirius: "Yes it does."

Grey: "Leave some damn potatoes for the rest of us!"

Sirius: "Fuck you!"

Grey: "Watch it! Hey Wierman, could you toss me a couple of biscuits? Many thanks man."

Wierman: "So you have a wife and two kids?"

Grey: "No, I have an on again of again ex-girlfriend and two kids."

Wierman: "How?"

Grey: "The usual way I suppose."

Wierman: "Whatever."

Grey: "Leave some stuff for Emily."

Wierman: "Who?"

Grey: "My ex."

Sirius: "You mean your neighbor."

Grey: "Come on, let's go watch tv and eat."

Sirius: "Finally something I can agree with!"

Grey: "No Futurama."

Sirius begins to speak but Grey cuts him off.

Grey: "No Family Guy or American Dad or Cleveland Show or Anything, Anything like that."

Wierman: "How about Being Human or Primeval?"

Sirius: "No."

Grey: "You've gotten to pick the last five times and I could really go for some Being Human right now."

Sirius: "No, I pick what we watch. That's the way it is and that's the way it'll stay."

Grey: "I am the boss, you are my employee and I own everything you see around you. We watch Being Human."

Sirius: "What's in it for me?"

Grey: "Apart from keeping your job? How about I pick you up some of that spendy Vodka you like next time I'm in Portland?"

Sirius: "I don't know..."

Grey: "If you let me pick for the next month with no complaints I'll send you on vacation, anywhere you want, all expenses paid."

Sirius: "Haha, I doubt it."

Grey: "How about this, no complaints and I'll raise your pay by two bucks an hour for the next six months."

Sirius: "No, I pick what we watch or we don't watch it. Queerman's and idiot and you're mentally unstable."

Grey: "My turn."

Sirius: "No."

Wierman: "Dude just take the money! Two bucks an hour is twenty bucks a day or a hundred a week!"

Sirius: "Oh shit is it? Well in that case I'll take the money."

Grey: "Good Boy."

They head into the breakroom and a few moments later Emily arrives.

She goes into the breakroom.

Grey spots her and smiles. She gestures him out into the main building, he complies.

Emily: "Hey there..."

Grey pulls her into a kiss: "Hey yourself."

Emily giggles a bit as he embraces her: "Mmm, finally I'll be able to show my face around here again now where's that surprise?"

Grey leads her into the stockroom where they grope each other for a bit then he reaches up on top of a shelf and pulls down a mid sized box: "Here we are."

Emily opens the box revealing a diamond studded collar.

Grey: "Happy Anniversary."

Emily: "That's not until Saturday."

Grey: "I know, this is just the first part of your gift."

Emily: "You always did know what I want."

Grey: "Only because you told me."

Emily: "Let's get out there before they begin to suspect something."

Grey: "Let them suspect, it won't be any worse than the things we've already gotten up to."

Emily: "Hmm, you uh, might need to show me again."

Grey: "Well then tonight I guess that's what I'll have to do."

Emily squirms a bit with anticipation: "My old dog always has a few new tricks for me doesn't he?"

Grey: "You know I do."

Emily presses herself into him: "I hope you know what you're in for."

Grey smirks: "Do you?"

Sirius (From the breakroom): "Quit fucking each other and get in here!"

Grey: "Whether or not we have sex on the cot is no ones business but our own."

Sirius: "I sleep on that cot!"

Grey: "So do Slips and anyone else I choose to let use it, what's your point?"

Sirius: "How many people have you let use it?"

Grey: "Counting you? Four, You, Slips, Wierman and Phil. I change the sheets twice a week."

Sirius: "No you don't!"

Grey: "Yes, I do, after closing Wednesday and Saturday."

Sirius: "You're a liar!"

Grey: "And you're the worst ever employee in history."

Sirius: "Thank you."

Emily: "Why do you keep him around?"

Grey: "I have no idea but you try getting rid of him."

Emily: "Naa, I think we'll keep him around."

Grey: "I'm not glad you feel that way."

Emily: "Neither am I."

Wierman: "Hurry up! He's doing that thing with his fingers again!"

Emily and Grey kiss one last time then saunter in.

Sirius lowers his hands: "So this is the infamous Emily, is it true your children were conceived doggystyle?"

Emily: "As I recall it was the Drunken Monkey position."

Sirius: "What's that?"

Grey: "Don't ask."

Wierman: "Really dude, just don't."

Sirius: "Fuck you. What is it?"

Emily laughs: "It's that thing where one of you hangs upside down by the ankles-"

Sirius cuts her off: "That's enough!"

Emily: "I though so."

Sirius: "So how long have you known Grey?"

Emily: "Since 2013 or so, our kids were born in late 2014."

Sirius: "What's he like at home?"

Emily: "I'm assuming not much different than he is here except he's not as bored."

Sirius: "That must be very interesting for you."

Emily: "Not really, it's rare for us to do anything that isn't completely sexual in one way or another."

Sirius: "My condolences, that must be terrible."

Emily: "For him maybe."

Sirius: "What's that supposed to mean?"

Emily smirks and presses herself into Grey: "That means that it's very rare for him to cum, makes me feel inadequate really."

Sirius: "I doubt it."

Wierman: "Can we please change the subject so I can get the image of Grey doing the Drunken Monkey out of my head?"

Sirius: "Fine, what's your house like?"

Emily thinks for a moment: "It's really cosy, sort of what I'd call an Author's Cabin."

Sirius: "What kind of dog do you have?"

Emily: "Lucky is a retriever or something, I don't know."

Sirius: "What's your last name?"

Emily: "Silvertail."

Sirius: "Your human last name."

Emily: "Sjieldi."

Sirius: "Not your maiden name."

Emily: "Sjieldi."

Sirius: "Really?"

Emily: "No, that was a Douglas Adams reference."

Sirius: "You aren't going to tell me either."

Emily: "Silvertail is our real name, our human name is just a formality."

Sirius: "I'll bet it is. Nice collar."

Emily: "Thank you."

Sirius: "Not you, the bitch underneath you."

Grey: "Whatever, I need to schedule a buyout meeting with Morris, Emms, would you like to come?"

Emily: "Sure, why don't you close up early tonight?"

Grey: "Done. You two can go, we'll be leaving in about ten minutes or so."

Wierman: "Cool man, peace!"

Sirius: "Whatever, I'm gonna go get stoned."

Grey: "See ya tomorrow."

Emily locks the door after they leave while Grey talks to Morris. Once he's done she pulls him heavily into the stockroom.

Fade out.

Grey: "Fucking front clips."

Emily: "Sorry."

End.

The Furside: Powertrip, by Grey Silvertail, Sirius Silverback and Fozzie Peach

Fade in: The Furside Storefront, Wierman's van is parked out front (The logo on the side is: Wierman's Exotic Supply) A middle aged man leaves with a bag containing a Fursuit.

Inside Slips, Grey, Wierman and Sirius are milling about the shop.

Grey: "Are you sure you can handle this?"

Sirius: "Go fuck yourself, of course I can handle this."

Slips: "Grey, we're just going out for lunch with a competitor, it'll be fine."

Sirius: "Oh, sure lunch. Hey Grey, will you be eating the fish taco?"

Slips: "No."

Sirius: "I think we know who wears the pants in this relationship, won't Emily be jealous?."

Grey: "Enough of that."

Sirius: "Wow, stepping up big guy? Maybe I was wrong. Oh wait, no I wasn't."

Wierman: "You just keep throwing them at him."

Slips: "You try talking to him for five minutes without doing it."

Sirius: "I wouldn't be able to stand talking to you for five minutes."

Slips: "You see?"

Grey: "Can we just go? I don't want to be late."

Sirius: "Have fun with your fish taco!"

Slips: "If you refer to my vagina as a fish taco one more time I'll give you one of your own then shove your face in it."

Sirius: "Man that was weak, I think that stink from your taco is affecting you. Also I wasn't talking about you."

Slips: "I'm going to get you, bad. Come now boss, we have a lunch that needs eaten."

Sirius: "Wow, scary little girl."

Grey: "Come on, don't encourage him."

Sirius: "Yeah, don't encourage me, I get enough of that from Queerman over here."

Grey: "Two hours, if anything is out of place and I don't find a receipt for it you're fired."

Sirius gives the Fuck You Salute: "Yes sir!"

Sirius waits until they leave in Grey's old beater then flips the sign to closed: "Now to the breakroom."

Wierman: "Cod Bop Duex?"

Sirius: "Si Senora."

Wierman: "I'm going to make some zombies wish they'd never been coded."

Sirius "face palms" then sets up the game.

Cut to Grey and Slips in his beater.

Slips: "What've you got for music in this thing?"

Grey: "I've got some Robbie Williams, Genesis, Modest Mouse and my radio."

Slips: "So basically the same stuff you play in the store?"

Grey: "Basically."

Slips: "Well at least it's not too bad, which Robbie Williams?"

Grey: "The Ego Has Landed."

Slips: "Well at least the first five are good."

Grey: "I like Let me entertain you."

Slips: "Why do I let you open your mouth?"

Grey: "Because you respect me?"

Slips: "That's not a good reason, I may respect you but you do do some pretty terrible stuff."

Grey: "Yeah but at least it's not too serious...Can you read this text?"

Slips: "Speaking of Sirius, he's asking where we keep the fire extinguisher."

Grey slams on the brakes: "What?"

Grey's phone pings again.

Slips: "He says "Just kidding.""

Grey: "Give me the phone."

Cut back to The Furside.

Sirius: "Knowing that pussy he just put Slips through the windshield."

Sirius's phone rings: "Hello Cap'n Spazz, how goes the eating of the taco?"

Grey (Off Screen): "Sirius, one more gag, one more smarmy quip and I'll make you clean the Gerbils out of the ceilings!"

Sirius: "I'll bet you want to clean something of hers!"

Grey: "I'm sending Phil over to check on you."

Slips: "Oh, great idea, have the other Sirius check it out."

Sirius: "Wow, I got away with a joke, awesome."

Slips: "Hang up and quit worrying, you'll need to be fresh when you meet Morris."

Sirius: "Fresh? Oh my. and where do we keep the emergency phone numbers?"

Grey: "Knock it off, if you absolutely have to you can shut the shop and hang out with Wierman in the break room."

Sirius: "Yeah yeah, you two have fun eating lunch."

Slips: "I'll show you lunch. Grey hang up."

Grey hangs up.

Sirius: "Where were we?"

Wierman: "I was kicking your ass."

Sirius: "We're on a team."

Wierman: "I betrayed you."

Sirius: "Douche!"

Cut back to Grey and Slips.

Grey dials Phil.

Grey: "Yaggalablow! Phil! Hey man I need you to drop by the shop and check on Sirius. Yeah. Kay, thanks."

Grey hangs up: "It's taken care of."

Slips: "You sent the irresponsible pig to check on the irresponsible underling at the Furshop."

Grey: "Phil isn't a pig."

Slips: "He's basically a bigger version of Sirius, he's a pig."

Grey: "You need to work on your interpersonal skills."

Slips: "You're one to talk."

Grey: "I'm a successful businessman, I may not have many friends but at least people like me enough to give me their money."

Slips: "God you're clueless."

Cut to The Furside break room.

Sirius and Wierman are playing in the break room, a couple moments later Claudy falls through the cieling.

Sirius: "You're paying for that."

Claudy: "Agreed."

Sirius: "Good, grab a controller"

Cut back to Grey and Slips, now arriving at the restaurant (Big Town Hero).

Slips: "Now remember, don't be nervous, the worst Morris will do is stare you down."

Grey: "That'll be his mistake."

Slips: "Something tells me you're right."

Grey: "Is he here already?"

Slips: "Yes, the third table on the left."

Grey: "Let's do this thing."

Slips: "Grey, one last thing, I haven't told you yet but Morris's brother is my boyfriend."

Grey: "Really? That's okay, I have a girlfriend and two kids you've never met."

Slips (Thinking he's joking): "Yes."

Grey: "Shall we go in?"

Slips: "Do we have a choice at this point? He's waving at us."

As they get out of the car cut to Siruis, Wierman and Claudy.

Sirius: "If you frag me one more time I'll make you eat those fucking grenades."

Claudy: "Nien! It is a rocket launcher! Not an RPG!"

Wierman: "No, that's a ground to air portable anti aircraft missile launcher, this is an RPG,"

Sirius: "Damn you Queerman!"

Claudy: "Eat Nerve gas Shiese Hahn!"

Wierman: "Did you just call me a shit rooster?"

Sirius: "Todd and the book of pure evil reference-respect bro. Now eat lead!"

Claudy: "Headshot Bitches! Now suck on this!"

Sirius: "Did you just no scope laser me from across the map and after rounding a blind corner?"

Wierman: "That got me too, how did you pull that off?"

Claudy: "Pull what off? I was going to bounce a sniper round around a corner and into your face."

Wierman: "Then who did that?"

Sirius: "Greg Rorschach. It's Grey's son, I just saw his gamertag, he's baiting me around a corner."

Wierman: "How's he on? This is a private match."

Sirius: "Grey has it set up so that he can join at any time, his brother works in the Xbox Live Tech Support branch of Microsoft."

Wierman: "So what's up with his family anyway?"

Sirius: "I only found out yesterday, just before Grey scheduled the buyout meeting with Morris."

Wierman: "You think that this is him fucking with us?"

Sirius: "No man, his wife came in a couple hours later, shit's legit."

Wierman: "But why?"

Sirius: "Why not?"

Wierman: "Good Point."

Claudy: "Quit talking unt play better! This Rorschach person ist killing us!"

Wierman: "That's because he's Grey's strange alien spawn. What do expect of the son of someone as sadistically boring as Grey?"

Claudy: "Who is this Grey person?"

Wierman: "He's the guy who owns this shop."

Claudy: "Right."

Sirius: "Damn it Greg! How the hell did he do that?"

Wierman: "Do what?"

Sirius: "He just hit me with a tomahawk from over the maximum throw distance by glancing it off a fence!"

Wierman: "That's okay, he just no scoped me without even trying then to top that off he spawn killed the German Guy before assassinating me seconds after I respawned."

Sirius: "I'm going to grab a headset."

Sirius (A few moments Later with a headset): "All right Rorschach, what's the big Idea?"

Amberle: "I'm not Rorschach, he's out with some friends at the moment."

Sirius: "Who is this?"

Amberle: "Amberle Silbarrow."

Sirius: "Your Dad's last name is Silbarrow?"

Amberle: "No, his last name is Silvertail, Silbarrow is just my boyfriend's last name."

Sirius: "Does you Dad approve?"

Amberle: "You'd be surprised just how cool he is."

Sirius: "I doubt he can be very cool at all."

Amberle: "He taught me almost everything I know, but I'm not here to divulge his secrets, I'm here to own you for that "Cutesy girl with her little pink fox ears" comment."

Sirius: "Well consider me owned."

Amberle: "Not until you apologize."

Sirius: "I'm sorry. Can we have our game back now?"

Amberle: "Alright."

Wierman: "She's left the game. Why are you signed in as Grey?"

Sirius: "I'm not, the German is."

Claudy: "My name is Claudien Heinrich VonSchtien."

Sirius: "Whatever, I'm gonna call you Shabadoo."

Claudy: "Do that and I'll do to you what my grandather did to those prostitutes."

Wierman: "That was threatening."

Sirius: "Yeah whatever, I'm gonna go take a nap."

To be continued.

The Furside: Buyout (Powertrip part two.) by Grey Silvertail and Sirius Silverback

Fade in: The Furside breakroom.

Grey enters angrily: "Did you guys know Slips was dating Walt Kinneson?"

Sirius: "That's really gross if that's the case."

Grey: "What the hell happened to the ceiling?"

Sirius points to Claudy: "He happened."

Grey: "Who are you? Nevermind. I've got bigger fish to fry."

Sirius: "I'll say, catch a salmon did you?"

Grey: "No, but I need you to promise that if I ever get it into my head to trust someone I know you'll give me a solid thwak with the bad idea stick."

Sirius: "Done."

Grey: "Now who the hell are you and what have you done to my roof?"

Claudy: "My name is Claudien Hienricht VonSchtien and I crashed through it on my jetpack."

Grey: "Whatever, I'm not going to pursue that but you're paying for the damages."

Claudy: "I've already agreed to do so."

Grey: "Good, I need to go cool off, in the mean time I want one of you clowns to pick up some plywood and waterproofing supplies to make a patch over that hole, okay?"

Wierman: "I'll do it, these two are assholes anyway."

Grey: "Good, I'll be at Scoops if you guys need me, god I could use some rocky road about now."

Wierman: "Righty ho boss, you'll reimburse me for those supplies right?"

Grey points at Claudy: "Talk to him."

Claudy pulls a wad of cash out of his pocket: "This should cover it."

Wierman laughs when he sees that it's all twenties: "Dude you must be loaded."

Claudy: "Like the glock in my other pocket."

Sirius: "Nice."

Grey: "Just get it done."

Wierman: "No problem."

Sirius: "And pick us up some burgers while you're out."

Claudy: "Order everything on the Burger King menu."

Wierman: "Is there enough here for that?"

Claudy: "Do Taco Bell as well."

Wierman: "How much is this?"

Claudy: "Eight or nine grand or so."

Wierman: "And you had this in your pocket?"

Claudy: "You betcha."

Sirius: "Hurry up with those tacos!"

Wierman shuffles out hesitantly but shakes his head as he closes the door.

Grey: "I'm in no mood for this kind of bullshit. Toss me the third controller, it's time the big bad wolf schooled ya'll on how to rock."

Sirius: "Don't ever say that again."

Grey: "Right."

Sirius: "What you wanna school me on?"

Grey: (Insert random popular and new-ish game here)

Sirius: "We'll see who get's schooled here pretty quick."

Grey: "We both know who does better here."

Claudy: "Yeah, me!"

Grey: "Let's rock."

Sirius: "You're not turning the radio on are you?"

Grey: "You betcha, but not my usual stuff, this one will be a special mix."

Sirius: "Not that ultimately shitty keep calm and carry on playlist is it?"

Grey: "No, I've only recently made this one, it was made with you in mind, it's stuff we can both agree on."

Sirius: "Why do I doubt that?"

Grey: "Playing it!"

Sirius: "Why don't you play on the other Xbox so that we can own all the other noobs as a team?"

Grey: "Excellent Idea."

Grey sets up the other console.

Cut to Wierman at Burger King: "I'm dead serious, I want two of everything on the menu."

Manager: "Show me the money."

Wierman pulls out the cash.

Manager: "Done!"

Wierman: "What'll be the wait time on that? I've got another order at Taco Bell I need to pick up in about a half an hour."

Manager: "Around forty minutes or so."

Wierman: "Okay, I'm going over to Safeway for some Ice Cream, be right back. (Tosses a thousand on the counter) Consider that my payment. I do expect the change when I get back."

Manager: "Of course."

Wierman heads out the door: "I'd better just get to Taco bell."

Cut to Slips with Babs.

Babs: "You're dating Walt?"

Slips: "Yeah."

Babs: "Holy shit girl!"

Slips: "I know."

Babs: "To be fair to Grey what you did was just fucked up, he looks at you like a sister."

Slips: "I know."

Babs: "So I guess that whole merger thin ain't happening now?"

Slips: "Grey bought him out."

Babs: "Did you two...?"

Slips: "Yes, we told him."

Babs: "Well that's good, just out of curiosity how long did you think you could keep that going?"

Slips: "Not long."

Babs: "Well you can't show your face around there for a couple days."

Slips: "I know."

Babs: "Come on, let's go get drunk."

Slips: "I would love some whiskey right now."

Babs: "That's the spirit."

Cut back to The Furside Breakroom.

Grey: "King of the hill!"

Sirius: "Fuck that, Team Deathmatch."

Claudy: "We've done three of those, how about a little variety?"

Sirius: "Fine, Koth then."

Grey: "Sirius can pick the map."

Sirius: "Fine, but no using that Brawler loadout, it isn't fair to the rest of the Noobs."

Grey: "He's more for Team Deathmatch. Scrapper is the one I use for Koth."

Sirius: "He's gay too."

Grey: "At least I don't have a loadout called Zombie Ninja Destroyer."

Sirius: "If we weren't on a team I might have to kill you."

Grey: "That didn't make any sense."

Sirius: "Neither do you."

Grey: "I bought Morris out."

Sirius: "When will we be moving?"

Grey: "The lease still has three months on it so two and a half months or so. There's a sniper somewhere nearby."

Claudy: "Got him."

Sirius: "So, what will we be calling it? The Furside Cafe?"

Grey: "I bought the whole building."

Sirius: "Doesn't answer my question."

Grey: "The Furside and Cafe Indieternative will be in two separate parts of the building. I'll also be renting out an empty studio to Dawson and Rover."

Sirius: "Any other bad news."

Grey: "I'll be putting in an Arcade as well as a much bigger and better breakroom with actual beds."

Sirius: "Awesome. Any bad news that your just trying to soften?"

Grey: "In order to make the money back faster I'm going to have to try to get DG, Epix and SD to move in as well."

Sirius: "That's not bad news, that's kind of awesome."

Grey: "I'll have to hire Babs."

Sirius: "There it is!"

Grey: "And Bartleby."

Sirius: "I like Bartleby."

Grey: "No you don't."

Sirius: "I like him more than you Count Dorkula."

Grey: "Isn't that obvious."

Sirius: "I should hope so."

Grey: "Hey, Claudien or whatever your name is."

Claudy: "Hvat?"

Grey: "What did you do to my roof?"

Claudy: "I crashed through it."

Grey: "How?"

Claudy: "My aerial thruster pack malfunctioned unt I crashed."

Grey: "Right...I don't think my insurance will cover that."

Claudy: "I will cover any charges, here, have ten thousand dollars."

Grey: "No thanks. I think I'll let insurance handle this if it's all the same to you."

Claudy: "Hvutever."

Grey pulls out his cell phone and dials his insurance agent: "Yeah, hey, I have a situation here, how soon can you be out?-Fifteen?-No that's fine.-No, they're still about two days out.-Well sorry, I did ask if you wanted it as an express order.-Well thanks!-Yeah, I'll make sure, no problem.-Yep, see ya then.-Okay.-Bye."

Sirius: "Was that your boyfriend?"

Grey: "Shut up and get ready."

Sirius: "I'm always ready."

Grey: "Good luck with that."

Claudy: "Shut up and pwn noobz."

Fade out.