Ingress: Vacation

Story by Xianyu on SoFurry

, , , , , , , , , , , , ,

#1 of Ingress: Vacation

Rainbow Dash and a human at a remote hotel in Equestria. Enter naughtiness!


Three years after First Ingress

Lionel sighed faintly, stretching out on the bed and staring at the ceiling. The dying sunlight striped the room, peeking in through the blinds.

It was afternoon, and the large leisure facility was deserted. The LakePoint Leisure Facility was a specialist 'resort' for both ponies and humans. It had been built the previous year, and opened for three months. It had everything: an olympic sized swimming pool, sauna, spa, tennis court, basketball court, archery range, and even a small library with mixed pony and human books. There was usually a large cloudbank circling the facility for pegasus to play in, and cloud-rings for races. The facility had been deserted for the past fortnight however and the clouds were no longer being maintained. It was off-season, and the entire human staff had gone back to Earth for holidays, while the ponies on the staff had gone to be with their families.

Lionel was the skeleton crew as it were, minding the facility for a few weeks. His secondary, an earth pony named Forked Branch, had made a deal with Lionel for the human to watch the facility by himself for the first week, and then the pony would watch it for the next week.

And so, Lionel was lazing. He had picked a room at the top of the main 'hotel' block and right in one of the corners. He was buck naked, with the curtains thrown open and the air conditioner on full, watching a dvd on the flatscreen television, as no TV stations broadcast in Equestria.

A dull tone reverberated throughout the facility.

Lionel cursed, rolling off the bed and grabbing his clothes, starting to tug on them. The dull tone reverberated again, like a chime. And then again, and again.

"I'm coming!" Lionel growled to no one in particular, straightening up his shirt and then snatching up the keyring, a special 'keycard' device developed specifically for ponies. It was a small pendant-like object that could be attached to a chain and hung around the neck, or even from a wing. It was made primarily since ponies didn't have pockets, for the most part. Built into the pendant was a microchip broadcasting a special magically-weighted signal that would open a hotel door so long as it was within a few feet of the receiver.

Lionel pushed the door open, snatching up a pair of slip-on shoes and then bolting down the hallway as the tone sounded again.

The tone was set up to the loudspeakers for the entire facility, and was specifically there for him. It was hooked up to the front door-bell, to let either Lionel or Forked Branch know when there was a visitor.

The elevator was slow, built for ponies. Earth ponies were shown to have a great problem with the inertia of an elevator, and so the elevator was made to move at a snails pace. Lionel took the stairs, sliding down them rapidly until he got to the bottom floor. He paused in the hallway, straightening up his hair, using a hung picture as a makeshift mirror. Lionel then moved for the reception area, stepping through the doorway.

A cyan pegasus with a very distinctive mane and tail met his gaze. She was standing in front of the counter, pushing her hoof down on the 'ring for service' button. A pair of purple eyes glanced up at him from over a pair of pink aviator sunglasses, and the pegasus huffed, tossing her rainbow mane. "About time!"

Lionel blinked once, bewildered. "Excuse me, ma'am?"

"I've been ringing this bell for at least ten minutes!" the pegasus stated, waving a hoof.

Lionel knew it hadn't even been five minutes, but pursed his lips, keeping it to himself. "May I ask why you're here?"

"I'm here to get a room," the pegasus stated simply.

"There are no rooms available," Lionel said smoothly.

The pegasus pursed her lips, her eyes narrowing. She looked left, and then right, and then back at Lionel. "And yet there is nopony anywhere here."

"You don't understand, ma'am. This facility is closed down for the next two months," Lionel said, as calmly as he could.

"Do you know who I am?" the mare asked with a slowly-raising brow.

"Rainbow Dash. Junior Flyer for the Wonderbolt," Lionel said smoothly. He had been a fan of the Wonderbolts since he had heard of them, and a mare with a rainbow mane and tail was quite distinctive, even in the larger formations.

Rainbow Dash looked taken aback at that, blinking once. "W-well... then you should treat me with respect! I'm part of the Wonderbolts!"

"I'm afraid that your standing in the pony world has little bearing on the fact that this place is closed down for the next two months," Lionel reminded pleasantly.

"You have rooms that are not occupied, yes?" Rainbow Dash asked flatly.

Lionel gave a cautious nod.

Rainbow Dash waved a hoof. "Then I will take one."

"That's not how it works," Lionel said, his tone becoming exasperated.

"That is how it works," Rainbow Dash stated, her eyes narrowing slowly.

"There are no cooks, no room service, no cleaners, no staff here, except for me!" Lionel pointed out, slapping a hand on the counter. "That means no meals, your bed will not get made, there are no activities, and no luxuries of any kind."

Rainbow Dash sniffed once, wrinkling her nose. "Well in that case... I'll only be paying half price."

Lionel gave a sound of suppressed rage.

"You eat while you are here, yes?" Rainbow Dash asked sweetly.

"No, I just starve for the entire two months," Lionel replied, tone laced heavily with sarcasm.

"Then you will just make double what you normally would, and I will eat the other half. But no meat," Rainbow Dash said calmly, her tone commanding.

"And now you want me to turn vegetarian?!" Lionel responded, his exasperation growing.

"Either give me a room, or I'm going to kick a door down and you can bill me," Rainbow Dash said simply, in a tone that left Lionel in no doubt that she would follow through with her threat.

Lionel sighed, shaking his head and pulling a pendant off a hook, placing it on a black pad that sat next to an extremely bulky laptop. He flicked the power on, and then waited a few moments for the special operating system to load. The entire laptop was a new technology entirely, using magic for its wiring and operation as opposed to normal means. The information itself was recorded, with magic, on small, colour-coded crystals. It was discovered, very soon after entering Equestria, that magical impulses completely burned out normal electronics, and rendered magnetic hard drive completely blank in seconds. A new technology had been needed to bring computers to Equestria, and even then, it was a young technology. Lionel had phones back on earth that were more powerful than the bulky laptop.

After several moments, the system loaded, and Lionel flicked over to the room selection. The pad hummed, and a small LED lit up on the back of it, glowing the numbers '051'. He held out the pendant. "Ground floor, room fifty-one."

"Ground floor?" Rainbow Dash asked, deliberately not taking the pendant. "I want top floor. Next to the roof access."

"But-"

"The hotel is empty! Don't pretend like you can't give me a room where I want!"

Lionel gave a suppressed growl in the back of his throat, placing the pendant back on the pad. He selected another room, one right across the hall from his own, and then handed the pendant to the pegasus. "Floor five, room seven."

"Better," Rainbow Dash said with a smug smile, snatching the pendant and then slipping it over her head, so that it hung against her chest. "See that my bags are taken up to my room, yes?" Without another word, Rainbow Dash started towards the hallway.

Lionel considered just leaving her bags in the foyer, but instead, he called after her. "I'm not a bag carrier! Carry them yourself!"

Lionel passed the rainbow pegasus as she walking back to get her bags, and she cast him a dirty look. Lionel just smiled warmly.


As Lionel was settling himself into his room, he heard the sound of the door across the hall opening, and heavy bags being dragged through. With a shake of his head, he flicked on the TV, popping a translucent purple crystal into the slot on the side of the TV. Immediately, an image of the Discovery Channel showed up on the screen. There were twelve hours of material on a single crystal, and the hotel had a stock of an entire year worth of eight different channels.

There was a curt knock at his door in just a few minutes. Rainbow Dash must have heard the TV.

Lionel sighed, sliding off the bed and then opening the door, raising a brow down at the pegasus.

Rainbow Dash peered up at him, giving a single snort. "I'm hungry."

"Dinner isn't for three hours," Lionel stated flatly.

"I didn't eat anything on the trip here," Rainbow Dash complained, a distinctive whine coming into her tone. "And seeing as the restaurant isn't open, you have to feed me."

Lionel closed his eyes for a moment, taking a deep breath. "...Fine. Fine. I'll cook something."

Rainbow Dash clapped her hooves together with a grin. "I'll see you in the restaurant then!"


Lionel sighed as he sliced a zucchini into neat little pieces, layering it over the curried rice he was preparing. This was not what he had signed up for. A 'meal' for him consisted of a single meat pie, heated in the magic-microwave. Maybe if he was feeling fancy, he would half-cook the pie, rip the top off, put a piece of cheese on it, and then replace the top before finishing cooking it. If he was feeling exotic he'd even throw instant mash potato with it! There was just not need to fire up the kitchen for a single person, or even two. But pegasi didn't eat meat, and so he was forced to turn on the oven, wait for the fire to get to the correct temperature, boil the rice, cut the zucchini, make the curry sauce, mix it in with the rice, garnish it all with the zucchini, and then add extras to it all! And all just for a meal! He half wished he could have told her to go outside and eat the grass. He had half a mind to eat the rice himself and just give her a family-sized plate piled high with grass clippings.

But Lionel was a good little worker, and instead, he came out with two large bowls, one for himself, and one for the pegasus.

Rainbow Dash was sitting in one corner of the restaurant, hooves crossed in front of her, head resting on them, watching the door like a half. Her ears perked up as she saw him, and she sat up straight.

Lionel made his way over to her, placing down her bowl, and the napkin-wrapped knife and fork, before making his way right to the other end of the room, pushing open the sliding door and selecting a seat on the balcony, facing outwards.

Grumpily, Lionel began to fork rice into his mouth, wishing that he had thought to fry some chicken to go with it. He was barely even started when he heard a rustle of movement behind him, and then Rainbow Dash was setting her bowl in the seat to the left of his own, at his table.

"What are you doing?" Lionel asked flatly.

"I believe I am standing. I am about to be sitting, and eating," Rainbow Dash said flatly.

"Did you have to pick a spot at my table?" Lionel queried, staring at her.

Rainbow Dash snorted once, looking about. "Why? Was someone else going to sit here?"

Lionel's eyes narrowing, and he shook his head slowly. "Fine, whatever." Lionel shoved his fork into the rice, heaping it into his mouth.

"So, how did you come to be the sole caretaker of this entire hotel for two months?" Rainbow Dash asked in between dainty forkfuls of rice.

"Punched a guy in the face," Lionel said with a shrug.

Rainbow Dash blinked. "I wish all job interviews were so simple."

"My father is an executive of the company that owns this entire hotel. They put me here because my behavior was making my father look bad. Affecting stock prices, or something. Got me out of the public eye," Lionel said with another shrug.

"Is your approach to conflict resolution always to punch it in the face?" Rainbow Dash asked sweetly.

Lionel's eyes narrowed, and he gave her a long, significant stare. "It isn't exactly a last resort."

Rainbow Dash laughed faintly at that, lifting a hoof to gently boop his nose. "You're so cute, thinking you're all tough. I spent months around Horse Power, and you think you intimidate me?"

Lionel jerked back at the poke to his nose, blinking at the pegasus for a long moment. "What the hell are you doing? Are you flirting with me?"

Rainbow Dash wrinkled her nose in distaste. "Uh, no! I'm just making a case that just because we're here doesn't mean we can't be civil."

"And here I was thinking it was your attitude that precluded civility," Lionel responded flatly.

The pegasus gave a soft giggle at that, shaking her head. "I'm afraid that I'm not the one with a terrible attitude."

"You really don't know how much of a bitch you are, do you?" Lionel asked, his tone amazed.

Rainbow Dash raised a brow. "Please, tell me about my attitude, I'm sure you've got an accurate scope over the ten minutes we've spent together."

"Enough to know that it was ten minutes too long!" Lionel protested, shaking his head and picking up his bowl. He stood then, and turned to walk away. "Dinner is at seven. Don't be late or you won't get any."


Lionel spent the rest of his afternoon: all two and a half hours of it, sitting in front of the TV, watching a Mythbusters episode about Unicorn magic.

And then it was back downstairs to begin preparing dinner. This time, he made up a recipe that the ponies created, a hayseed and olive-oil slurry baked at a very specific temperate and turned into a kind of pancake, that was then used to wrap around various vegetables to form a baking pastry that hardened into something like a flaky pizza crust. It was impossible to describe to someone who hadn't eaten it, but it was quite nice.

Lionel took a plate of the little wrapped bundles out to Rainbow Dash, whom was sitting at one of the tables, and then returned to the kitchen. After turning everything off, he headed straight out the back door towards the jacuzzi.

The entire jacuzzi was set up on the hill overlooking the valley to the east. A dark ribbon of a river crept through the rocks and the trees, snaking through the valley until it came to a small, still pond.

Lionel stripped off, put his plate on the edge of the jacuzzi, and then flicked it on. A magical power crystal somewhere underneath the jacuzzi itself fired up, and bubbles began to froth up from hidden jets. He slipped into the water, stretching out lazily and then reaching over for his plate, picking up one of the hayseed wraps and chewing at it idly, watching the moon shining over the valley.

The entire front surface of the jacuzzi building was a transparent magical shield. It wasn't evident except for the occasional flicker of teal across its surface when a bug or leaf impacted it. This left a perfect view of the valley with no impeding glass or other surfaces.

There was the sound of the door to the jacuzzi room opening, and Lionel groaned inwardly.

Rainbow Dash stalked over to the jacuzzi, placing her plate down and then testing the water with a hoof. "It's cold."

Lionel slowly raised a brow at her. "No one says you have to get in."

"Oh, I'll get over it," Rainbow Dash said with a shrug, slipping into the water with a splash. She came up with a grimace on her face, working one of her wings slowly back and forth in the water.

Lionel sighed, shaking his head. "Why are you following me?"

"Because," Rainbow Dash said with a faint shrug. "You're the only other person here, and I hang around Pinkie Pie. Without constantly having my ear talked off, I start to get uncomfortable."

"I'm not much of a talker," Lionel said, pursing his lips in annoyance, grumpily picking up another hayseed wrap and chewing on it.

"I've noticed," Rainbow Dash replied simply, giving him a significant look. "You really don't like me, do you?"

"Was it that obvious?" Lionel asked, blinking at her.

Rainbow Dash snorted, tossing her mane. "But I'm quite alluring, yes?"

"Beauty counts nothing against attitude," Lionel said with a slow shake of his head.

"So you admit that I'm attractive?" Rainbow Dash asked, batting her eyelashes.

Lionel sighed, putting his head in his hands for a moment. "Yes. Yes you are attractive. But your attitude is not."

"And what exactly is wrong with my attitude?" Rainbow Dash asked calmly.

"You're just so... entitled!" Lionel said, exasperation creeping into his tone. "Give me this, give me that. You act like the world owes you everything!"

Rainbow Dash raised a brow slowly. "And when exactly was I acting like this?"

"When you were asking for a room, when you were asking for dinner. So basically, when you were awake!" Lionel growled in response.

Rainbow Dash stared at him, before saying tactfully, "And when I wanted a room, I was paying for it, yes?"

"...Well, I suppose-"

"-And when I was asking for food, it was allotted eating times, yes?" Rainbow Dash cut across him.

"Well, yes-"

"-So one would be able to say that I deserved these things. Seeing as I am paying for them?" Rainbow Dash finished with a smug smile.

"Ugh, I hate you," Lionel stated with a slow shake of his head.

"Only because I'm right," Rainbow Dash replied with a slow smile.

"You could at least ask nicely. Instead of demanding," Lionel rebuked with a growl.

Rainbow Dash raised a brow slowly. "But what do I get from being nice, when the result will always be the same?"

"It'd make me happier," Lionel stated flatly.

Rainbow Dash laughed. "But I don't care about your happiness. I don't know you. I don't need to expend effort on your happiness."

Lionel just stared at the pegasus for a long, long moment.

"What?" Rainbow Dash asked, a single ear perking. "Too blunt?"

"Kinda, yeah," Lionel admitted.

"Don't even pretend you don't feel the same way. If you weren't bound by the moral obligations of your position here, then you'd have told me rack off the moment I showed up," Rainbow Dash explained calmly. "And you wouldn't have given a single care what I thought."

Lionel pursed his lips and didn't respond.

"I'll take your silence as an affirmation," Rainbow Dash said with a grin, picking up one of her own hayseed wraps and chewing on it happily. "No, if you were to give me a reason to be nicer to you, why, I might just do that."

Lionel snorted, turning away and picking up another wrap, biting it in half with a scowl.

Rainbow Dash just smiled, relaxing back against the edge of the jacuzzi, giving a sigh of contentment.


It was a full half hour before Rainbow Dash decided to leave the jacuzzi. Crickets chirped, and the cool dampness of the night was in full sway. Lionel was slightly worried. The air condition in the hotel room wasn't an original earth model, and actually used water and magical ice to cool the air, instead of a refrigerant that removed moisture from the air. This meant that he couldn't run the air con and expect to dry out quickly.

Lionel watching Rainbow Dash pulling herself out of the jacuzzi, and then stretching slowly, wincing and arching her wing faintly.

"Do you... have any IcyHot here?" Rainbow Dash asked hopefully.

"IcyHot?" Lionel asked with a slow blink.

"Erm... Deep Heat?" Rainbow Dash corrected.

"Ah," Lionel said with a blink, before making a face. "We have some... in the newsagency. But it's closed down until the workers all get back. I don't have the keys because it's not staffed by the hotel itself."

Rainbow Dash whimpered faintly at that. "Well... thanks anyhow."

Lionel frowned after her as she started off, before he called: "What did you do to your wing?"

Rainbow Dash paused, looking slightly embarrassed. She looked back over her shoulder for a moment, and gave a wry smile. "I uh... kinda hurt it doing some stunts earlier. Guess I didn't warm up properly."

Lionel nodded once at that. "There's an ice machine on one side of the restaurant. Should be some ice in it still. Try that."

"Okay thanks," Rainbow Dash said, stalking off without another word.

Lionel sighed faintly, staying in the tub another ten minutes before picking up both of their plates and returning them to the kitchen. He popped them into the dishwasher, and then locked up for the night, grabbing a small tub of chocolate ice cream from the freezer and a plastic spoon on his way out.

Lionel headed back up to his room to relax for a little while before he retired to bed early, as no doubt Rainbow Dash would want breakfast. He heard faint whimpers from the room across the hall as he held out his amulet to open the door, and he frowned slightly. With a grimace, he went inside the room, found the bottle of skin moisturizer, and then heading back out into the hallway, tentatively knocking on Rainbow Dash's door.

There was a rustle of movement, and then the mare came to the door, pulling it open and grimacing up at him, her ears splayed back, obviously in pain but trying her best not to show it. "Yes?"

"I uh..." he held up the bottle of skin moisturizer awkwardly.

"Yes?" Rainbow Dash asked again, baring her teeth for a moment.

"Oh for god's s-" Lionel cut himself off, shaking his head and then stepping inside the room, closing the door after him. "Get on the bed."

"W-what?" Rainbow Dash asked uncertainly, suddenly seeming afraid.

"I'm going to massage your wing, get out that strain," Lionel said with a shake of his head.

"Oh..." Rainbow Dash said with a single blink, before brightening. "Okay!"

Without another word, Rainbow Dash clambered up onto the bed and then splayed out across it, her right wing half-bent, crooked and crumbled.

Lionel gave a long-suffering sigh, pulling himself up onto the bed as well, kneeling besides her. He gingerly extended her wing, making the mare gasp and stiffen, her hooves clutching at the bed. "B-be gentle."

"I barely even touched you," Lionel said with a shake of his head, squirting some of the moisturizer onto his hand, and then smearing it across the leading edge of her wing. Using his thumb and forefinger, he began to knead and work the cream into her feathers, carefully rubbing. "Here?"

"Lower," Rainbow Dash murmured, peering back at him over her shoulder. "A little to the left..."

A faint groan and a shiver left the pegasus as she clenched her hooves on the bed even further, tensing slightly, biting her bottom lip. "Y-you found it... h-hurts..."

"You're all tight," Lionel said with a frown, staring off into space as he carefully inspected her muscles with his fingertips. "Try to loosen up a bit or we'll be here all night."

"I'm trying!" Rainbow Dash rebuked with a grimace, clenching her teeth and then forcefully extending her wing with a sharp cry of pain.

"There, better," Lionel soothed, holding her wing outstretched and then beginning to slowly work it back and forth, all while kneading and massaging his fingers into the joint of her wing, where the muscles appeared to be locking up.

"A-ah... that feels kinda nice now," Rainbow Dash murmured, slumping slightly into the pillows with a groan of relief.

Lionel gave a soft laugh and slowly shook his head.

"What's so funny?" Rainbow Dash asked, huffing faintly.

Lionel shook his head. "Just picturing what someone would think if they were standing outside with their ear pressed against the door."

Rainbow Dash blinked at that, pondering for a long moment, before her eyes widened. "Oh." Her cheeks flushed just faintly and her tail gave a soft flick back and forth.

Lionel continued to knead and rub at her wing carefully, before swapping one of his hands to her other wing. "Extend."

Rainbow Dash did as asked, extending her wing outwards, so that her impressive wingspan was on display. Lionel pressed his fingertips to the same place on both wings, rubbing slowly at her, humming thoughtfully. "Well... there's a little bit of swelling in there that I can feel."

Rainbow Dash didn't respond, biting her tongue and whimpering softly.

Lionel took the hint, releasing her wing. "Whatever happened to the ice?"

"Melted," Rainbow Dash said helplessly. "Pegasus have high body temperatures."

Lionel frowned at that, and then slid off the bed. "Wait here a moment."

A quick step back outside of her room, leaving a slip-on shoe in her doorway so the door didn't lock again, he retrieved his chocolate ice cream, and then returned to the pegasus' room.

"What're you doing with that?" Rainbow Dash asked with mild concern.

Lionel smiled, and then placed it directly on her wing, over the joint. There was a few seconds before Rainbow Dash gave a low, happy groan and melted into the bed. "Oh... Oh that is nice..."

With a soft chuckle, Lionel removed the lid of the ice cream, and then dug the spoon into it. It was already soft from the time it had spent outside the freezer, and he slipped a spoonful into his mouth happily. After a moment of indecision, he scooped up another amount and then offered it to the pegasus.

Rainbow Dash made a faint, indecisive sound, and then opened her mouth, closing it over the spoon and then dragging backwards, suckling the ice cream from the spoon and then swallowing with a contented sigh. "This is actually rather nice."

Lionel gave a faint chuckle at that, nodding and then patting her wing. "Well, rest up, and your wing should be good in no time."

"Thank you... erm..." Rainbow Dash opened an eye to peer up at him, looking at his chest.

"Lionel," he responded with a shake of his head and a wry smile. "I don't wear a name badge."

"Well thanks, Lionel." Rainbow Dash murmured, stretching out slowly.

"I'm sorry for... you know, the attitude," Lionel said with a strained smile. "I'm not exactly the first person they'd choose for customer relations."

Rainbow Dash giggled at that, shaking her head. "I noticed."

"Well thanks for the confidence boost. We should do this again sometime," Lionel said sarcastically.

Rainbow Dash gave a noncommittal sound, waving a hoof at him dismissively.

Lionel pulled himself up from the bed. "Goodnight, Rainbow Dash."

The pegasus gave an indistinct sound at him, seeming to be half-asleep already. Lionel just shook his head, slipping out of the room.


Lionel had breakfast made at 7AM, a very simple 'meal' that ponies had proved to love immensely: Weet Bix with banana and raisins. Rainbow Dash was quite content with it, and after dumping at least four tablespoons worth of sugar on it, happily munched it all down.

After that, Lionel was free until lunch time, and instead of just vegging out in front of the TV, he headed up to the roof. The rooftop of the hotel was the Pegasus Bar, an open-air bar run by ponies who served traditional Equestrian drinks. To one side of the bar was a relaxation area and a patch of fake grass specifically designed as a small driving range for those who enjoyed golf.

Lionel wasn't much of a golfer, but hitting a small object with a big stick was more amusing than anything else he had planned for the day.

The driving range was, as with many of the things in the hotel, magical.

Once the ball was hit from the hotel, a magical 'funnel' would capture it and draw it to a certain point. The inertia would be swapped around a little and the ball would end up travelling through a tube and popping back up out of a pipe and directly into the ball bin.

Lionel started hitting golf balls, using a driver. There was something satisfying about hitting the ball right and hearing the meaty thud of impact before the ball went soaring off into the distance. Lionel wasn't accurate by any stretch of the imagination, but the 'funnel' stretched almost a hundred and eighty degrees around the rear of the hotel.

It was partway through belting the little balls off the rooftop that Lionel began to feel like he was being watched. He kept glancing towards the stairwell, expecting to see a flash of rainbow colour there.

Lionel swapped clubs, deciding to try something different. The new club was wedged, a higher hit, and the ball sailed upwards almost vertical. Lionel sidestepped, covering his head with his arms and wincing slightly as the ball came down nearby. As he looked upwards, however, he caught sight of a rainbow-coloured tail poking out over the edge of a cloud. He stared up at the cloud for a long moment, noting a pair of eyes watching him.

"Spying on me huh!" Lionel called out towards the cloud.

Rainbow Dash's head appeared over the edge of the cloud, and she poked her tongue out. "What can I say?! It's amusing to watch someone mindlessly hit a small object with a stick!"

"I think all that can be said about your attention span was summed up in that sentence!" Lionel called back, shaking his head and then kicking the golf ball back onto the fake grass.

As he stepped back up to hit the ball, there was a thud nearby of a pegasus landing. Lionel froze halfway through his swing. "Don't step behind me when I'm swinging. That's a good way to get hit in the face."

Rainbow Dash snorted once, rolling her eyes and taking a step backwards.

Lionel set up his shot again, taking the shot and shivering at the lovely thwack! that resounded.

Rainbow Dash tilted her head slightly to the side. "What is the aim of this game?"

"Taking out suppressed rage on a small, inanimate object," Lionel explained, as he picked up another ball, placing it down.

"It seems rather... pointless," Rainbow Dash stated flatly.

Lionel paused, leaning on the golf club. "Well... as an actual sport, golf is a game of skill. You have to drive the ball towards a small green, dodge the sand pits and the water hazards, get it on a green with grass specifically sewn so the ball doesn't roll in a straight line, and putt the ball into a tiny little hole."

Rainbow Dash tilted her head to the other side, blinking once. "Seems... boring."

"Quite," Lionel said, setting up the ball again and then smashing it into the distance. "But just hitting the ball is fine enough."

"Humans are weird," Rainbow Dash said with a shake of her head.

Lionel paused at that, leaning the golf club against a chair and peering at her for a long moment. "You just dropped off a cloud. I don't think you get to call anything 'weird'."

Rainbow Dash blinked, and then looked up at the cloud, and then back at him with a sly grin. "You've never felt a cloud, have you?"

Lionel raised a brow, and then gave a short laugh. "Kinda. Stood up on a mountain in Australia once, when the clouds were low enough that they were touching the peak. Didn't feel like much, though."

A slow grin spread across Rainbow Dash's face, and she looked up at her low-floating cloud, and then back at him. "Do you wanna?"

Lionel peered back at her for a moment, turning back towards the chair to take the golf stick again, not quite comprehending what she was saying. "Wha?"

There was a rush of air, and then suddenly, a pair of firm, surprisingly strong hooves had gripped him around the middle, and he was being tugged into the air at a speed that was astounding and utterly terrifying.

With a quick twist and flick of her body, Rainbow Dash tossed him into the air, flicking him up past herself. Lionel fairly yelled, flailing his arms in fear, eyes wide. He came down with a muffled thud atop the pony, his eyes wide, hands finding her forehooves and squeezing them, his knees holding around her stomach for dear life.

Rainbow Dash giggled up at him, spreading her wings out languidly and raising a brow at him. "Something the matter?"

Lionel was almost hyperventilating, staring down past Rainbow Dash's wing and at the hotel rooftop a fatal distance below. "Getmedown! Getmedownrightfuckingnow!"

Rainbow Dash giggled again, shaking her head. "But you just got here. Here, have some cloud!" she said, as she scooped up some in her hoof and then splatted his face with it. The cloud dissipated the moment it hit him, becoming something like mist.

Lionel was too scared to take notice of much of anything, but he did see that around her wings, the cloud seemed to bunch up, like surface tension in water, or the surface of a water balloon stretching to hold water. He shook his head rapidly, clinging to the pegasus helplessly.

"Afraid of heights?" Rainbow Dash asked innocently, pricking her ears upwards.

"This height?! Yes!" Lionel declared, pushing at her chest with his palms. "GET ME DOWN!"

Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes, poking out her tongue at him. "Humans are wimps," she stated, as she wrapped her hooves around the human and rolled them both off the cloud.

Lionel screamed as the ground rushed up at him at an insane pace, his hands covering his face. Rainbow Dash spread her wings, pulling them up short of the ground, and then dropping him all of three feet into one of the deck chairs lining the roof. He hit the chair, and rolled out of it, basically hugging the floor in relief, whimpering faintly.

Rainbow Dash giggled faintly, raising a brow at him. "Problem?" she asked innocently.

Lionel looked up at her with a murderous expression.

Rainbow Dash giggled again, turning away and flaring her wings, looking back over her shoulder and poking out her tongue as she bounded away.


Lionel opened the kitchen for lunch, but only put out a plate of tofu for the pegasus, before he snuck off to the basement of the hotel and the underground sauna room. There were heated rocks down here, warmed by magic. With a quick turn of a faucet, steam began to fill the room, and Lionel sat down on a bench, shrugging out of his shirt, and then his pants, tossing them aside and draping a towel around himself.

In mere moments, Lionel was asleep, laying back and letting the steam and the heat seep into his muscles.


Lionel jerked awake, blinking his eyes open and sitting up, wincing and stretching his muscles. He was sweating, and condensation was beading on his bare skin.

Lionel caught sight of a rainbow coloured mane in the steam in front of him, and he quickly snatched up his towel, tugging it over himself more completely and staring at the mare. "What're you doing in here?!"

"You weren't bothered when you were asleep," Rainbow Dash replied with a noncommittal shrug. "And it's rather nice in here."

"You are such a creep," Lionel stated, shaking his head slowly, holding the towel to his chest.

"Lower the towel, please," Rainbow Dash said with a roll of her eyes. Lionel flushed hard, pushing the towel down and closing his legs tightly, pursing his lips. Rainbow Dash continued, "And I require you to operate the facilities, so would you prefer I woke you up and demanded that you open the pool?"

Lionel pursed his lips further. "I don't know."

Rainbow Dash smiled sweetly at that. "See? There are reasons to my actions."

Lionel shook his head. "You're annoying."

"I think you're a swell guy, too," Rainbow Dash said sarcastically, rolling her eyes and then stretching out her wings with a fain groan.

"Wing still giving you trouble?" Lionel asked with a smug smirk.

Rainbow Dash snorted once. "No!"

Lionel raised a brow. "Strain your wing carrying a certain someone up into the clouds, huh?"

"Actually," Rainbow Dash said with a flat glare, "I injured my wing returning you to the ground before I was ready. Since you were so afraid of the sky."

"I was afraid of falling to the ground and dying," Lionel stated with a faint growl in his tone.

Rainbow Dash snorted. "I'm glad you have confidence in my flying abilities."

"You dragged me into the clouds!" Lionel hissed, eyes narrowing at the pegasus.

"And you made me injure myself getting you back on the ground!" Rainbow Dash declared with a huff. "So you have to fix it."

Lionel stared at her, his eyes narrowing. He opened his mouth to complain, but Rainbow Dash cut across him with the sweetest, honeyed tone: "The customer is always right..."

A low growl built in Lionel's throat, and he pursed his lips, grinding his teeth together.

Rainbow Dash pointedly spread her injured wing outwards, raising an ear at him.

With a huff, Lionel dropped to his knees, and then shuffled over to the pegasus, gripping the edge of her wing with his fingertips and stretching it out a little further than necessary. Rainbow Dash arched slightly and hissed in pain, her eyes narrowing at him dangerously.

Lionel gave her a smug smile. "Tender?"

Rainbow Dash gave him a dangerous glower, and he relented.

"Relax," Lionel said, gently touching at her wing joint with his thumb, rubbing firmly, testing the muscle.

Rainbow Dash winced and bared her teeth, the wing springing out on reflex, stiffening as he squeezed at the tended joint. One of her hindlegs pressed hard against the ground, the muscles under her cyan hide tensing and rippling. "B-be gentle!" she admonished, scowling.

Lionel pursed his lips. "Relax. You're being all tense and it's locking the muscles up."

Rainbow Dash snorted at him, and then bit her tongue, her ears splaying back as he pushed harder at the ground with her hindhooves, and then relaxed. Her wing went limp in his hands, and Lionel immediately rubbed his thumb firmly across the muscle, making it relax even further. Rainbow Dash tensed up even further, clenching her teeth, before slowly relaxing with a sigh of relief.

"I didn't even realise how tense that was getting," Rainbow Dash murmured with a low groan.

"It's a wing," Lionel said with a shake of his head. "The muscles are designed to lock on downbeats. That's how they work."

"You sure know a lot about wings," Rainbow Dash said suspiciously.

Lionel chuffed a laugh at that, kneading gently at the wingjoint. "Of course. I was studying to be a masseuse. Ponty studies were very in vogue at the time of my training and pegasi were allotted a good month of our course."

"So you're a trained masseuse?" Rainbow Dash asked, staring up at him and giving a low, happy groan at the kneading of her wing.

"I dropped out," Lionel said with a wry grin.

"Why did you go and do that? You're a natural," Rainbow Dash murmured with a happy purr.

Lionel took a deep breath. "Well... you know wings are sensitive, right?"

Rainbow Dash gave a slow. "I might have noticed, given that I own a pair."

Lionel rolled his eyes. "Well, I was practising on our substitute teacher, a pegasus from Las Pegasus. She was a pretty outgoing pony. I didn't have a knack for this quite yet."

"And that got you fired?" Rainbow Dash asked, blinking once.

A sly grin spread across Lionel's face. "I was inept. I... well, I kept hitting the really sensitive points."

"Really sensitive points?" Rainbow Dash asked blankly.

"Well, once human fingers started getting near pegasi wears, it became apparent really quickly that there are certain points and certain pressures that cause... well, arousal in the subject," Lionel said, giving a helpless smile.

Rainbow Dash stared up at him, her head tilting to one side slightly. "So... you got her aroused, and you got fired?" she asked blankly, looking doubtful.

Lionel laughed and shook his head. "No, I got fired when I was caught screwing her over the massage table."

Rainbow Dash looked alarmed at that, staring up at him with wide eyes. "Y-you had sex with her?!"

"Why not?" Lionel asked with a shrug, kneading at the pegasus' wings slowly, working out the knotted tension in the injured one. "She was asking for it. Begging, actually."

Rainbow Dash stared at him for several long seconds and then gave a derisive snort. "I don't believe you. I've had my wings massaged before, by you no less, and I haven't gotten aroused." The mare tossed her mane with a contemptuous roll of her eyes.

Lionel sighed faintly, shaking his head. His hands slipped down her wings, between the bones, finding one certain little spot and then squeezing quite deliberately between the tendons and the fragile bones, gently squeezing one certain spot.

Rainbow Dash moaned faintly, stretching out with a soft whimper. "O-oh... that's kinda nice..."

Lionel raised an eyebrow, and then squeezed with more pressure.

A soft whimper left the pegasus as she squirmed faintly in place, her stomach muscles visibly convulsing and her wings suddenly stiffening and springing outwards. Her eyes widened, and her breathing audibly increased in speed.

"Problem?" Lionel asked sweetly.

Rainbow Dash panted faintly, her ears pinning back, cheeks flushed pink. "I-it just h-hurt is all."

Lionel gave a reasonable nod at that. "Ahhh, okay. Too much pressure then," he said, his innocent expression turning devious as he began to rub with a more gentle, but rolling, firm motion across the spots he knew brought about those feelings in the sensitive nerve endings of the wings. Pegasus wings were made up of hundreds of these spots, meant for feeling minute changes in air pressure and flow, but responded very well to the direct stimulation of soft fingers.

Rainbow Dash bit her bottom lip, her tail giving a little bit of a quivering flick back and forth. Her stomach convulsed again, and she whimpered faintly, her forehooves squeezing at the ground.

Lionel didn't let up, rubbing and squeezing down the length of her wing firmly, trailing down the leading edge of her wing.

Bottom lip quivering, Rainbow Dash suddenly leapt to her hooves, dancing slightly in place, her wings stiffened and quivering. "I-It's too hot in here!" she exclaimed, her voice breaking as she turned and bolted out of the sauna as fast as she could go.

Lionel watched her go, laughing faintly.


After a few minutes, Lionel headed up to his room, carrying a bottle of water for the pegasus. Spending time in the sauna was a good way to get dehydrated, and though she was annoying he didn't want to be responsible for harm to her.

Walking down the hallway though, he heard faint whimpers spilling from around the corner of the her ajar door. Concerned, he stepped up to the door, pushing it open and peeking inside. His mouth opened so he could turn his concern into words, but he froze at the sight in front of him.

Rainbow Dash was laying half-in, half-out of the shower, her wings splayed out across the tiles. The door to the bathroom was open fully, and so was the shower door. The shower was on full blast, hot water cascading down over her upper half and wings, but that was a foggy image that Lionel could barely see through the fogged-up open glass door of the shower.

The pegasus' lower half was completely exposed though, and her odd position became immediately apparent. Rainbow Dash's legs were splayed, her rump lifted into the air and tail pushed aside. With her chest on the floor, her forehooves were freed up to push between her hindlegs, and a violently pink vibrator was being pushed and rubbed against her drooling cunt with an urgent motion of her hooves.

Lionel stared, his eyes wide, his mouth suddenly dry. In seconds, he was hard, and he was subconsciously pushing a hand down the front of his pants. He couldn't wrench his eyes from the sight of the pegasus grinding the vibrator against herself so eagerly. Her hoof constantly pushed it against her outer lips, and occasionally between them, visibly pushing the soft, pliable cyan outer lips apart, and spreading her tight pink folds just to slip into her body. The vibrating of the toy was faintly audible, barely loud enough for him to hear it over the splashing of the water. Lionel noticed that her wings were pressed up under the spray, most likely trying to get stimulation from the constant pressure of the water stream.

Rainbow Dash whimpered again, crying out aloud and clenching around the toy, her hoof grinding against the base of it and against her clit over and over again, a splash of hot liquids spilling around the pink toy and over her hoof. Slowly, the pegasus relaxed, whimpering and giving soft little gasps, lowering her rump to the floor slowly, her tail flicking over, covering herself again.

Lionel quickly slipped back before the mare could get up, and pulled the door mostly closed again, quietly stepping away from the door, and then deliberately walking, quite heavily, back towards it. He knocked on the door louder than necessary, clearing his throat. "Uhhh... Rainbow Dash? I got a bottle of water for you. You're not supposed to go without hydration after being in the sauna. It's just outside your door, come get it when you're ready."

By the time Rainbow Dash came to get the bottle of water, her cheeks flushed with warmth, Lionel was already safely in his room, leaning against the door with a hand stuffed down the front of his pants, the image of Rainbow Dash masturbating emblazoned on his mind.