Gortoz 'A Ran - ch 63 - A simple touch...
#64 of Gortoz 'A Ran
That night, Meagan and I buried the hatchet. Well, it didn't mean we were best friends all of a sudden. To me, it felt more of an uneasy alliance between the two of us. But at least the fights and arguments stopped as the days passed by, which was good enough for me. Even though the situation with Meagan was somewhat solved, things stayed the same with Nikki. After that particular night with her, I was reluctant to stay over every time she asked... The distance between Nikki and me grew with each day that passed by... Whenever I held her hand in public, she quickly let go of it... Whenever I looked down, she wasn't looking back, like she was ashamed of me... A kiss from her didn't felt sincere anymore... But still... A simple hug still gave me the butterflies in my stomach... Not as much as it used to be but it was still there nonetheless... I didn't want to think that things were going bad between us... With all the things said and done, Nikki still kept her distance with me... I had the feeling she only wanted to have sex with me and nothing else while I needed so much more from her... And even though I gave myself to her so many times, she never gave in to my needs... Somewhere, deep down inside, I wanted to believe that she truly loved me... She just hardly ever showed it... It didn't felt that I was being loved by her... What she did that particular night made me feel that I was just being used by her...
It really hurt me whenever she called me up and asked me to come over, only so that she could keep me at a distance again... I often just visited her where we sat on the couch watching some TV... Sometimes we shared a cuddle and a kiss... But kissing her made me feel disgusting for what she did to me... As if it was some kind of an approval, as if I had to be content with it... I talked a lot to her about how I was feeling but this was something that I wasn't able to tell her... How I felt that particular night... Truth be told, I didn't know what to tell her anymore and I often wondered what I was doing there... We used to go out, have a lot of fun wherever we were going... And I often thought back of those days whenever I was with her... But looking at her and the way she behaved, I just knew that those days were gone... There never was a reason why things were going bad, other than the fact that Nikki was very distant with me for reasons I didn't know at the time... But despite that, I always kept coming back to her... Because holding her hand still gave me butterflies... It gave me hope that things would get better if I gave her enough time... But by doing so, I chose to get hurt every time I was together with her...
Things like that have an impact on your mental state of mind. Being angry, sad or depressed only seemed to make it worse... The nightmares, those sleepless nights, it all came back because of it... It drove me insane... Those dreams I had were mostly about my mother and the war... I know that every problem can be dealt with, as long as you know how to deal with the source of it... I've always had trouble with that but somehow I've managed to whenever I faced them... I knew what the source of all those dreams were except I didn't know how to deal with it... It was proving to be very difficult... To dig up memories you tried to forget for so many years... To pry open the wounds that never really healed... I needed to know what really happened there when I was little but at the same time, I didn't, afraid that I would remember things I'd rather forget... It's the reason why I never looked into it... But wondering in the dark with all these questions wouldn't give me any answers at all... Dwelling in the present while I still had so many questions from the past... So I had to confront it one way or another, to finally find peace... I know I wasn't gonna like it... But I had to, in order to move on...
I sat behind my desk one day and booted my computer. There was this nervous tingle in my stomach the moment I realized I really was gonna look into it... I took several deep breaths and my hands were trembling the moment I searched for keywords on the internet... It brought me straight to Wikipedia to find information about the war... The little summary I found on the search page made me hesitate to read the full article... But nevertheless, I still did... Here's the article I found on Wikipedia...
Civil war in Salahadihn From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
"The Civil War in Salahadihn (Urdu: ???? ?? ????? ????) began in February 1992 when ethnic groups from the Rahgnaya and Badakhshan regions, which were underrepresented in the ruling elite, rose up against the national government of President Gökhan Al Mansuriyah, in which people from the Dhi Surjayigh and Kulyab regions dominated. Politically, the discontented groups were represented by liberal democratic reformists and Kahnarusians, who fought together and later organized under the banner of the Rahgnaya Liberation Army. By November 1995, an estimated 2,3 million to 3,1 million people had been killed.
RLA leader Sayid Abdulloh Nuri, and Special Representative of the United Nations Secretary-General Tarim Seiyun signed the "General Agreement on the Establishment of Peace and National Accord in Salahadihn" and the "Daijirian Protocol" on the 27th of November 1995 in Akbarabad, Daijiru, ending the war.
Background
Tensions began in the spring of 1992 after opposition members took to the streets in demonstrations against the results of the 1991 presidential election. President Gökhan Al Mansuriyah and Speaker of the Supreme ACCR Safarali Kenjayev orchestrated the dispersal of weapons to pro-government militias while the opposition turned to rebels in Kuriyakistan for military aid.
Fighting broke out in August 1992 between old guard supporters of the government and a loosely organized opposition composed of ethnic and regional groups from the areas Rahgnaya and Badakhshan (the latter were also known as Pamiris). Ideologically, the opposition included democratic liberal reformists and Kahnarusians. The government, on the other hand, was dominated by people from the Dhi Surjayigh region, which had also made up most of the ruling elite during the entire ACCR period. It was also supported by people from the Kulyab region, who had held high posts in the Ministry of Internal Affairs in ACCR times. After many clashes, the Dhi Surjayighians were forced to accept a compromise and a new coalition government was formed, incorporating members of the opposition and eventually dominated by them. On 7 September 1992, Mansuriyah was captured by opposition protesters and was forced at gunpoint to resign his presidency. Chaos and fighting between the opposing factions reigned outside of the capital Qaryat Shurraf that quickly spread throughout the country. The ruling coalition government in the capital was forced to resign when the RLA committed the coupe and thus seizing control, which only intensified the hostilities between the opposing factions. The civil war became a fact.
The height of hostilities occurred between 1994 and 1995 and pitted the Kulyabi militias with an array of groups, including militants from the Rahgnaya Liberation Army (RLA) and ethnic minority Pamiris from Badakhshan against the civil insurgents. In large part due to the foreign support they received, the Kulyabi militias were able to soundly defeat the civil insurgents and went on what has been described by the International Rights Watch as an ethnic cleansing campaign against Lo'Kohardishas and the Royandoshis. TheAl Mulyahil genocide campaign was concentrated in areas south of the country and included the murder of prominent individuals, mass killings, the burning of villages, and the expulsion of the Lo'Kohardishas and Royandoshi population into Daijiru. The violence was particularly concentrated in the province Qurghonteppa. With the collapse of the coalition government, the province was now fully under control by the RLA, which was home to many Lo'Kohardisha. Hundreds of thousands were killed or fled to Daijiru.
Turn of the tide and peace
Other combatants and armed bands that flourished in this civil chaos simply reflected the breakdown of central authority rather than loyalty to a political faction. In response to the violence, the MNAF was deployed. Most fighting in the early part of the war occurred in the southern part of the country, but by 1994, the RLA were combating Osirian troops in the capital city of Qaryat Shurraf. Kahnarusian radicals from northern Daijiru also began to fight Narezkanian troops in the region. Narezkanian and Osirian troops responded to the hostilities with success. The RLA suffered severe losses, eventually forcing them to surrender.
An MNAF-sponsored armistice finally ended the war in 1995. This was in part fostered by the Inter-Salahadihn Dialogue, a Track II diplomacy initiative in which the main players were brought together by international actors, namely the Democratic republic of Osiria and the United Federation of Narezka. The peace agreement completely eliminated Badakhshan region (Khujand) from power. Presidential elections were held on the 6th of December, 1995.
The RLA warned in letters to MNAF Secretary General Richard Johnson on 23 of September 1995 that it would not sign the proposed peace agreement on September 27 if prisoner exchanges and the allocation of jobs in the coalition government were not outlined in the agreement. Akbar Turajonzoda, second-in-command of the RLA, repeated this warning on the 26th of September, but said both sides were negotiating. President Rahmonov, RLA leader Sayid Abdulloh Nuri, and Narezkanian President Yuri Vakhrushev met in Akbarabad, Daijiru on 28th of September 1995 to finish negotiating the peace agreement. The Salahadihnian government had previously pushed for settling these issues after the two sides signed the agreement, with the posts in the coalition government decided by a joint commission for national reconciliation and prisoner exchanges by a future set of negotiations. Narezkanian Foreign Minister Yevgeny Primakov met with the Foreign Ministers of Daijiru, Sharyuhanistan and Yughabosthet to discuss the proposed peace accord.
By the end of the war, Salahadihn was in a state of complete devastation. The estimated dead numbered from 2,3 million to as many as 3,1 million casualties, which mostly consisted out of civilians. Around 1.2 million people were refugees in- and outside of the country. Salahadihnian physical infrastructure, government services, and economy were in disarray and much of the population was surviving on subsistence handouts from international aid organizations. The MNAF established a Mission of Observers in October 1995, maintaining peace negotiations until the warring sides signed a comprehensive peace agreement in 1995 which ended the war."
I know what you're thinking. I was just as confused as you are right now. It didn't make much sense to me, except for several names I heard when I was little on the news that sounded familiar. But what really got me was that there was no information about people who were ever put to trial for their war crimes... Information I looked up about the RLA didn't reveal many new things... I thought that by diving into the past, I would get some answers but raised more questions than I already had... I know lions belonged to the Pamiri's, leopards to the Royandoshi and tigers to the Lo'Kohardishas. I learned at school that lions and tigers had wars in the past before while leopards tried to stay neutral. Guess there really never was a way for us to get along with each other. The war only lasted for two years, which is relatively short compared to other wars that took place in history but with devastating consequences... I saw on the bottom of the page several related articles but there was one that I kept staring at... The Al Mulyahil genocide campaign... I clicked it... Here's what I got...
Al Mulyahil Campaign From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
The Al Mulyahil Campaign, also known as the Salahadihnian Genocide or Operation Mulyahil was a genocidal campaign against the Lo'Kohardishas in southern Salahadihn, led by general Yildiz Al-Dimashqi during the height of the civil war in Salahadihn. The campaign also targeted other minor communities in Salahadihn, including Royandoshis. Many villages belonging to these ethnic groups were also destroyed.
Summary
The Al Mulyahil Campaign began in March 1993 and lasted until June 1995, and was headed by Yildiz Al-Dimashqi. The Al Mulyahil Campaign included the use of ground offensives, aerial bombing, concentration camps, systematic destruction of settlements, mass deportation and firing squads with the intention to systematically eliminate Lo'Kohardishas and other ethic communities.
Concentration camps and extermination
When captured populations were transported to detention centres (notably Topzawa near the city of Haydan), adult and teenage males viewed as possible insurgents were separated from the civilians. After a few days in these camps, the males accused of being insurgents were trucked off to be killed in mass executions.
On March 25, 1993, directive SF/4008 was issued under Al-Dimashqi signature. Al-Dimashqi ordered that "all persons captured in those villages shall be detained and interrogated by the security services and those between the ages of 15 and 70 shall be executed after any useful information has been obtained from them, of which we should be duly notified." In January 1994, at the height of the hostilities, general Al-Dimashqi issued directive order SF/5471, which stated that "all ethnic communities __who threaten the established order and the national security are to be detained and executed."
The "Green Zone" Massacre
On the 14th of may, 1994, the Al Mulyahil Campaign led to the attack of the refugee camp in Turaif, also known as "The Green Zone". Approximately 380.000 people sought refuge after they fled from the hostilities. At 2:32 AM, the RLA positioned mortar batteries in place. At 3:53 AM, general Al-Dimashqi ordered the attack to be carried out.
After the initial bombing of the camp, ground forces were sent in with the intention of not only killing civilians, but the attack was also targeted at Nedermerian troops in retaliation of the "foreign yoke of oppression". The remaining Nedermerian troops weren't able to repel the large scale attack. An inevitable breach was made in their line of defence, which gave RLA troops access to the camp and everyone who was in it. None of the 1500 Nedermerian troops stationed in and around the camp settlement survived. Out of the 380.000 civilians who sought refuge in the camp, only 167 survived, making this the largest genocidal event that took place in the civil war.
Aftermath
Statistics
According to the IRW during the Al Mulyahil campaign, the Salahadihnian government:
- Massacred 1.8 million to 2.9 million non-combatant civilians, including women and children
- Destroyed about 4,000 villages (out of 4,655) in Salahadihn. Between March 1993 and June 1995
- Approximately 250 towns and villages were exposed to chemical weapons
- Destroyed 1,754 schools, 270 hospitals, 2,450 mosques and 27 churches
- Wiped out around 90% of villages in targeted areas.
Trials
Al Mulyahil trial
General Al-Dimashqi was charged with war crimes and genocide at the end of the war. He was convicted in June 1997 and was sentenced to death. His appeal of the death sentence was rejected on 4 September 1997, he was sentenced to death for the fourth time on 17 January 1998, and was hanged eight days later, on 25 January 1998.
What was I supposed to think after reading those two articles? That it actually gave me answers to all of the questions I still had? So many articles related to the war... It's funny how those articles described my people as "insurgents"... I believe the definition of an insurgent means "a person who revolts against civil authority or an established government." There was no civil authority or an established government... Only chaos and anarchy, like my mother once described it... Total anarchy, she called it... Still, the RLA seized power and therefore the government so technically, they were revolting against them... But with good reason... My people didn't fought for what they believed in, unlike them... They fought for their very existence... A right which I believe is for everyone... Not just for those who think are superior... Being underrepresented and being an ethnic minority doesn't give you the right to force the same fate on others...
That day, I've read several articles about the war, thinking it would give me answers and to finally find peace. But it didn't... Some things didn't make any sense to me, things I didn't understand. I couldn't find articles that went in depth about the trials, only about the general who authorized the genocide who was sentenced to death. I guess that's what diplomacy is all about... Sell out that one guy to save the skin of many others... But maybe I just didn't want to know what really happened to them... So I guess some questions are just meant not to be answered... Some questions are meant to be left in the dark... But with everything that happened, there was still one question left to be answered... All these years, I've been waiting for an answer that never came... I looked at the picture of my parents and only asked myself one thing... Why did it had to happen...? It was a question that Wikipedia couldn't answer... No one could... I knew the wounds would never heal, from all the things I've seen and experienced there when I was little... I knew most questions would be left unanswered... And by that, I would never find true peace within... To give it a place... There was peace in Salahadihn but I guess for those who experienced it, the war never ended... It made me believe that Santayana was right... Only the dead have seen the end of war... I looked at all those photographs that Wikipedia has regarding the articles about the war and the genocide and knew that those images would haunt me for the rest of my life... To know I've been there when it happened... To have seen it all...
I sighed quietly and turned off my computer... And I sat there at my desk for a long time, staring at my locket my parents once gave me when I was little... Staring at it never gave me answers to the questions I had but I always wanted to think that it could... I got snapped out of it the moment I heard a quiet knock on my bedroom door and a short moment afterwards, it opened up slowly... I saw it was Catherine who stood there... 'Dinner is almost ready, sweetheart.' 'Y-Yeah, I'll be there in a minute...' 'What's the matter, honey?' 'N-No... No, nothing's wrong...' 'You look upset, is everything alright...?'
I looked at Catherine and that depressed feeling slowly seeped away... Catherine is not my mother but despite all the things ever said and done, she was still willing to be one for me... When I looked at her that day, I didn't really know how I felt... An overwhelming sense of gratitude, I suppose... It made me realize that I keep dwelling in the past and neglect the things I have in the present... I remember my father once said to me when I was little that we're too busy to live our lives that we actually forget what it really means to be alive... It wasn't until that day I finally understood what he really meant with... To live your day like its your last and be thankful for the next... To cherish the things you have some people would take for granted... I always had a hard time taking those simple things for granted... Simple things like having a family and friends... Everything can be gone in just a blink of an eye... And maybe that's the reason why I've always been so careful with people... Not getting too personal with them, afraid to lose them... But Catherine was still there and so was everyone else... The wounds will never heal but I'll be fine, as long as I have them to be with... I placed my necklace on my desk and walked over towards Catherine as a tear was rolling down my cheek the moment I placed my arms around her shoulders and held her close... Catherine seemed startled, seeing as I rarely did such a thing to her... But nevertheless, she had a weak smile on her face the moment I did... 'What's on your mind, sweetheart...?' 'Nothing... I'm fine now...'
I gave Catherine a kiss on her cheek and held her close once more... The moment I placed my head on her shoulder, her hand caressed my hair while her other hand was placed on my back... That safe feeling she always gave me when I was little came back with just a simple touch... And I never felt so happy in my life before... 'Thank you...' 'For what...?' 'For everything you've ever given me...'