FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

I'm writing this for Xan. Korrado-Xan. This is me giving something back to you, mate, because I want you to keep going on strong. Things'll get better. You'll see. *brofist?*

(Your stories are still some of my favourites, too.)

Just one straw. One more bloody straw, and this camel's back would break. A frustrated groan drowned out the hum of a computer. The groan came from the muzzle of a silvery-white leopard, mottled like the rest of his kind with brownish-black spots. A very handsome pattern, the sort that one could get lost in, were they to stare long enough. Of course, the leopard felt that nobody ever stared long enough. He wasn't unattractive, lord knows. Sure, he was a little haggard around the eyes, but who wouldn't be if they were miserable?

At least the monitor couldn't turn itself away in disgust, the leopard thought. He, for he was indeed a he and not a she, stood and stretched languidly. His muzzle cracked open and a low yawn rumbled forth, a very lethal set of teeth reflecting the monitor's soft glow. The leopard looked around the room. It was reasonably tidy, considering he hadn't had a visitor in what felt like years. The curtains, nondescript curtains, blocked the light from entering. The sun was well and truly up, and as the leopard reluctantly poked his head around the curtains to behold the world outside, it sent mischevious rays of light to sting his eyes.

He screwed them up and cursed under his breath, drawing back the strips of cloth and bathing himself in warmth. God, if summer wasn't annoying for someone as reclusive as he. With a grimace, the leopard turned away and flopped onto his rumbled bed.. He supposed he should tidy it. He also supposed he should eat. And while he was at it, he also supposed he should get everything else sorted out.

That last thought was equally appealing and unappealing. Unappealing because, well, there was no guarantee everything would stay sorted, even if he managed to sort it. So why bother in the first place? On the other hand, it was appealing, because the leopard was getting sick of only getting some relief with his paw and a passable bit of porn. Fighting with himself, the leopard groaned once more, wearily this time.

Five minutes later, the leopard sat up. It was summer for christ's sake, he thought to himself. Summer! Why was he even sat in here, anyway?

The leopard rolled over and huffed. He knew why. He didn't like the why, he wished the why had never become his why, but it was. Why? Because it was a why, that's why.

This rather confusing bit of logic made the leopard frown. He wanted to go outside, he knew, but he was afraid. Outside his bedroom, things changed a lot. He wasn't sure he liked change any more. He'd been through some pretty rough changes, and was altogether quite despondent enough, thank you! So going out would be a silly risk.

The time display on the monitor shifted. Another minute passed. And another. Then three more.

Ten minutes total, the leopard sighed inside of his mind. Ten minutes he had sat (well, laid) and debated leaving his house. If he didn't hurry up, the whole day would pass. But why hurry? He had nowhere to go. Nobody to see on such short notice. He didn't really have all that much money left, either. It was near the end of the month and luckily, he'd gotten through it with all his bills paid and expenses covered.

He felt a bit proud of himself for that. And with that small amount of self-esteem, he felt he could face the world today. For a bit. An hour or two. At a stretch.

Twenty minutes later he got up off his bed, shook away his doubts (with difficulty) and dressed. The leopard didn't bother to tart himself up, settling for his favoured band's official t-shirt and a pair of stonewashed jeans. At least the black colour of the shirt complimented his fur, and the washed out blue wasn't too contrasting with his silvery pelt. Not bad, he supposed.

As he stepped into the bright midday glare, he shielded his eyes and observed the street. It was the same as always. That broken lamp post on the corner that flickered at night. There was that crazy old cat lady's house. And a little way down the street the other way was that weird jaguar's house. The leopard privately thought the jaguar was stalking him in his spare time.

Then again, he mused as he slipped on a pair of plain, cheap sunglasses, why would anyone waste their time stalking a dude like him?

The passage of time into the afternoon saw the leopard shuffling along the pavement, wandering through the centre of the city in which he lived. The bustling metropolis was as much of a beehive as ever, especially on a hot Thursday like this. So close to the weekend, tempers were frayed and were frazzled by the heat. The leopard passed a backed-up line of cars, filled with sweating business-furs. He flicked an ear as one of these furs wound down his window and leant out to shout obsceneties at the cars in front, which accomplished the expected result of nothing.

The leopard rolled his eyes indifferently and walked on. Furs passed by with increasing frequency, the closer he got to the main street. He lowered his eyes behind his glasses and scuffed his trainer-shod paws a little more. There was that discomfort again. There was that jealously that he felt when he say anyone particularly enjoying themselves. He wished he could have a bit of that blatant happiness for himself. Just for a bit.

With an irritable twitch of his spotted left ear, the leopard pushed those thoughts away and increased his pace. There was that pretzel stand around the corner, and the leopard felt a bit peckish. He told himself his budget and near empty wallet could take the strain, and turned the corner with a scrape of rubber.

The leopard collided with a person coming the other way. Instinctually he shied away from the contact, avoiding a potentially painful headbutt as the other party in this collision stumbled forward as it tried to correct it's balance.

"Oh, lord. Sorry!" Came a cheery voice, and the leopard inwardly groaned as he made to walk on his way, waving the incident off with an apologetic (if indifferent) paw. How many perfect bubbles was he going to bounce into today?

"Hey! Are you okay?" There was that voice again. The leopard realised it was following him, so he bit back a sigh, stepped out of the path of the foot traffic, and turned to face the person he'd bumped.

What he saw confused him, and faintly, intruiged him. The person he had bumped turned out to be a very androgynous person indeed, a husky that stood just a little bit taller than he. One ear drooped comically forward, while the other remained perky and alert. The round face was feminine, but the eyes that stared back has a rather masculine cast, in the way that they sat slightly off-center. Broad, probably strong shoulders supported a slender neck atop a faintly curved torso. When the husky stuck out a paw to shake, the leopard noticed how delicate and soft that paw was, even without touching.

Suddenly, he found himself shaking the husky's hand while staring at his...her legs. The thin waist spread into legs built by running, defined muscles displayed through the jogger's leggings the husky wore. The leopard yanked his gaze up quickly and blushed, and opened his mouth to apologise.

The husky, however, was still talking.

"...and I can be such a klutz sometimes, yanno, but I like to think it's endearing! Anyway, you look like you aren't hurt, so good!" The husky said cheerily, curled tail a-wagging. The leopard blinked and wondered how he could say that he hadn't been listening at all. He examined the husky again, briefly, taking in the plain white fur and those muddy brown eyes, and found himself persistently incapable of figuring out this mystery person's gender.

The husky, to his or her credit, seemed unpertubed by the leopard's stare, smiling away as they stood to the side of the pavement. Pedestrians rushed by to their various destinations, adding to the leopard's disoriented feeling. He felt as if time had sped up, and he didn't quite like it. Taking a breath to steady himself, he looked away from the husky's brown puddle eyes, and shrugged.

"Yeah, I'm okay. Sorry about walking into you." He muttered, and the husky smiled ever more broadly.

"Oh, so you can talk! I'd wondered." The husky winked cheekily and giggled. Like the rest of him or her, the husky's voice seemed to toe this odd line between male and female, sounding like either, and neither all at once. "I feel pretty awful, though, I had my head all in the clouds and didn't even see you coming. I was just on my afternoon jog. Days off in the summer are wonderful, aren't they?" The husky asked, chattering away as the leopard blinked, still feeling rather lost. He shook his head, and the husky noticed. Her demeanour became concerned, and he or she placed a dainty hand on the leopard's shoulder.

"You sure you're okay?" The white-furred husky asked, peering through suddenly narrowed eyes at the leopard. He had to admit, those almond-shaped eyes looked cute, narrowed like that. He shook himself again as he realised he had indeed been thinking about the cuteness of this stranger's ocular organs. That was quite unusual. But then again, this was an unusual circumstance.

As he realised the husky was talking to him again, he swallowed and nodded.

"Y-yeah. I just...never mind. You can get back to your jog." He replied in a sheepish murmur, tucking his hands into his pockets and studiously avoiding the husky's gaze. The canine raised an eyebrow, tilted his or her head, then frowned.

"No, I can always jog more later. I want to make sure you aren't hurt. Or, at least, make it up to you for being such a bother." The husky said, sounding sheepish his or herself. That flopping ear twitched and the husky tried to push it upright in vain, but unlike the leopard, did not avert his or her gaze. The leopard was unused to being looked at for this long, so he decided to just go along with this energetic enigma's insisting.

"Okay. I mean, fine...I was just, uh, gonna grab a pretzel." The leopard said quietly, gesturing with a paw and instantly feeling silly for doing so. Of course she knew where it was, idiot, she probably passes it every day, he berated himself. While he was beating himself up, the husky was nodding, and smiling again.

"I'll get one too! I like pretzels, even if they are pretty bad for you, if you eat lots. I guess everything is like that, though! Too much of a good thing, as they say." He or she said animatedly, starting off back the way she or he came.

It took the leopard a few seconds to will himself to walk after the husky. He thought about just walking off, but he'd opened his big mouth and told her where he was going. He'd rather not appear like a rude dick, too. And he was hungry. So he followed the husky, weaving past throngs of furs as he walked to the pretzel stand.

It was a simple affair, and aluminium construct with a wide parasol to keep the sun off. The parasol was quite ragged, a few holes in the faded yellow cloth admitted circular shafts of light. The light pouring through the holes gave the stand attendee a dappled sort of complexion. He was a pig. Not in the unpleasant, lazy-slob sense, but an actual pig. Which probably made standing around, handing out snack foods a hellish job.

The smell must drive him up the wall, the leopard figured as he stepped up beside that odd husky, his black nose lifting as he inhaled the scent of butter and salt. It made his stomach gurgle petulantly at him, and he shifted, embarrassed. Neither the husky nor the pig gave any sort of sign that they had noticed, so the leopard counted his blessings and stayed quiet, letting the husky purchase his or herself a pretzel.

As he stood there, waiting for both the moreish snacks to be handed to them, the leopard turned his thoughts inward. What was he doing out here? Why was he even bothering to talk to this husky? It wasn't like they were very similar. The odd...person was vibrant and as multi-sided as a die, while the leopard himself? How painfully average he felt beside the husky. He should really be trying to fix the problems with his life, rather than talking to this complete stranger.

He was brought quite suddenly out of his reverie by a tap on his shoulder. The leopard looked up sharply, feeling like a prize tit for being so lost in thought. A pretzel waved back and forth before his muzzle, tantalisingly close, and the leopard bit his lip. He hadn't realised how hungry he was. Then he blinked. The paw holding the pretzel was the husky's.

"I went ahead and paid for yours too, because I didn't want to ruin your in-depth study of your trainers." She or he teased with another cheeky smile. The leopard flushed, feeling a little irritated, despite the good natured cast of the jibe. He took the pretzel and almost started off the street, before he halted himself. Grudgingly he turned to look at the husky.

"Thanks..." He mumbled, even as it took a bite of it's own pretzel.

"Iff nuffinmmn!" The husky replied with a mouthful, then blushed and brushed crumbs from it's muzzle and swallowed. "Sorry. Habit. So, what are you doing on a lovely sunny day like today?" It asked, sounding genuinely interested. The leopard blinked, taken aback once again by this stranger's open nature. He could do nothing but shrug, and the husky raised an eyebrow.

"Nothing? Just out for a pretzel?" It asked curiously, as if it found the absence of a reasoning from the leopard just as fascinating as he found it's eccentricy. The leopard nodded mutely and began to eat the snack, walking onward. He felt uncomfortable standing around in the middle of the street with this stranger, talking about nothing in particular. It was just so out of the ordinary, that he had no idea what to do. However, the husky didn't seem to be put off, and instead hurried to walk beside him, happily munching the salty treat.

"Well, if you have nothing else to do, how about I show you where I work?" The husky asked, a smile on her face that seemed both eager and secretive - the kind of smile one would wear in anticipation of an innocent prank. The leopard chewed his pretzel apprehensively and shifted his shoulders non-commitally. He wondered where such a curious person worked, yes, but at the same time, it was a total stranger he was talking to, here! A stranger than had bought him a pretzel just because they bumped into each other, he reminded himself. If the husky was that altruistic, it was unlikely that it was setting him up for some horrible fall.

The choice was made for him, even as he deliberated further, for the husky had taken his shrug as a yes, and clapped her paws (having finished her pretzel) together in satisfaction.

"It's close, actually! You might've been before, but...no, I think I'd remember." It smiled, and the leopard felt a fresh wave of uneasieness. But he had to admit, his curiousity was mounting, too. So he followed this whimsical canine through the streets. It wasn't far, as the husky had promised, and they turned onto a smaller street lined with shops and a bar. Near the corner that they had rounded, however, was a dance hall.

From the look of it, it seemed to cater to a myriad kinds of dancing, for a glance through the windows showed sensible, conventional rooms for dancing in, but the husky smiled that secretive smile and winked before it said;

"There is a hall in the back too, but that fills up at night." It headed for the door, and paused with a paw on the handle. The husky turned to regard the leopard with an inviting sort of expression, and he felt as if he were standing on a precipice before the husky even asked the question.

"Would you like to see me dance?"

The leopard bit his lip. He had never been to this place before. He didn't know this person well. He hadn't been out of his house for this long in a while, and he already felt uncomfortable enough. Everything he knew was comfortable and safe called to him. His room, his computer, his bed and his house. He could shake the husky's offer off, leave, and he would likely never see this person again. And he had scarce few friends already. He just didn't know. And it was that fear of the unknown that stayed his footpaws.

Frozen to the spot, he glanced from side to side, as if some inspiration might come hurtling toward him from either end of the street. But it wasn't until he looked back into the husky's eyes that he felt that inspiration. So what if he couldn't quite tell the canine's gender? So what if he was sailing into uncharted seas, right now? Why not take the chance? He already knew where he would end up if this didn't turn out well, and in that moment, he decided he didn't really want to go back home and spend the rest of the day alone.

Better to take a chance, when you've got nothing to lose. Better to take every opportunity that comes your way. After all, the leopard had already been kicked around enough by life. It was past time for him to stand up and take control again. Just leaving the house today had led to this! What would tomorrow bring? Be it good or bad, the leopard decided he wanted to face it. And with this new friend, he figured he might have found a good influence for himself at last.

He smiled at the husky, and he felt his battered soul lift somewhat. And it felt good, even though it was a small start.