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A happy new year

To Miguel there was no better place to be at the end of the year than the 'Wine & Dine' club; a favourite haunt for him with the friendly atmosphere, good music, decent drinks and pleasant company, all the things that made an evening real memorable.

Well, that was if he wasn't drinking so much, looking into his empty glass that last pint had vanished quicker than he desired; but to be frank tonight it didn't matter he just wanted to unwind, forget a troubled year and be carried away by the buzz of new year's eve, dammed to the consequences of the morning after.

Glancing around he flashed a smile and laughed as a joke was made by another male he sat next to, the canine was another regular here along with the two other males occupying this table full of charm and wit engaging in various antidotes on the end of the world or at least the one that never happened. Regarding him with much amusement, Miguel enjoyed the banter with him; it kept him in good spirits when he felt down. Though not as sharp of wit like the dog he could certainly hold his own in exchanges made in bed, something that made him smirk at the memories having hoped that was on the cards tonight, but Mitch since they last met had found a long term partner, the wolf on his left also a good friend of Miguel.

As the evening wore on and the conversation continued, he found something souring his mood, first thought to just be tiredness but it grew into an irritation, did the fact he suspect he wasn't getting lucky tonight actually bother him? No, it could not have been that, plenty of game in the club.

Stirring the ice at the bottom of his cup, quietly pondering on it he glanced between Mitch and Aaron noticing how they kept gazing into each other's eyes with deep affection, was he actually feeling jealousy for them?

The thought that it could be true un-settled him, true enough he was surrounded by friends and bed mates but what of someone who could love him the way those loved each other, ah now that was something he had no desire for. To reflect on only brought a pointless sense of loneliness.

Standing up and rattling empty glass he made his excuses and left them to it seeking out the bar for a re-fill and someone else to chat to. The club was full of party goers, plenty to pick from though most had migrated to the dance floor or tables in packs clutching party poppers and donning silly hats as the midnight approached.

Waiting at the bar tapping a paw in time to the beat, his gazed wandered over to the specialty area of the club a more discrete area to where both the pred and prey patrons could indulge themselves that nature of fetishes, somewhere he'd visited on many an occasion. Though he quite fancied re-acquainting himself with a 'friend' there tonight, they probably wouldn't let him in being this drunk.

Turning his attention elsewhere that troubled thought arose again; he disliked feeling lonely but it wasn't something he could ignore feeling it more keenly the more he reflected on it, the drinks didn't help the matter either, the novelty of the alcohol buzz wearing thin turning into something else.

The same old adage plenty of friends, bed mates and a great lifestyle full of fun adventure but no one to really love or share that life with.

Sucking on an ice cube he dismissed that thought, love was complex, un-compatible and painful to him and his experiences.

Call it apathy or call it self-pity but he didn't get love; sure he knew and understood that people loved him , both those of male and female distinction and felt flattered by it, yet felt the distinct lack of ability or connection to return it. Had he forgotten what real love was? Too lost in free and easy sex that it no longer meant the same to him?

Miguel crunched the ice cube with contempt. Fuck it. He'd never find anyone right for him so why bother whining about it.

Here, in this club, everyone found what they wanted by being themselves doing what they felt like with the night, be it dancing, drinking or having a good time. So why couldn't he do the same?

Maybe he had led himself too far astray, having sex for the sake of sex till it no longer held any thrill for him, was that all he really wanted from life, a quick rut?

Closing his eyes, perhaps that was the crux of the problem.

Maybe that wouldn't be such a bad idea for a new year's resolution, give up one night stands and try find a more meaningful relationship, well either that or find something more fulfilling to do in his free time, hah! Yet all that was all too quickly forgotten when out the corner of his eye, Miguel caught sight of an attractive black panther female in a red trimmed dress also waiting on service.

Captivated by her exotic beauty he forgot himself and let someone else order as he took more time to study her.

Stylishly dressed, the clothing complemented her figure with those curves all in the right places revealing enough to remain tasteful but so very tantalising; she certainly knew how to attract attention herself broadcasting a sexy confident independent female out on the town. Yet what drew him to her most was her species, a definite big cat with that supple toned body and shape but still ambiguous in origins, jaguar or leopard he mused.

Whoever she was, the very sight of her stirred his heart to sit up and take notice, it wasn't very often a female could do that for him perhaps the resolution could wait till tomorrow, this girl was too good looking to ignore.

Miguel caught up debating her precise breed didn't see where he had put his paw down to support himself, contacting with spilt liquids and slipped with a jolt.

"You look like you've already had much to drink" A well groomed tabby cat chuckled in pleasant banter serving behind the bar.

Miguel chuckled seeing the humour in the jest. " No no no, I know my limit"

"hahahah! Fair enough, so what can I get you?"

"I'll have another dragon gem and give the lady in red whatever she wants, put it on my tab." He indicated.

The cat nodded, looking in the feline's direction before giving a knowing smile.

"Of course sir, here you go."

Taking his own drink, Miguel meandered through the crowd seeking out a secluded spot for himself somewhere to the back but with a good view of the dance floor just somewhere where he could find respite and collect his thoughts. It was a good night for letting go of the past and welcoming the new year, something that he could do with as his head swam a little from the alcohol, he shouldn't drink he knew it affected him this way but what had past abstinences done for him except drive him down and feel un-social. Okay so he drank and occasionally smoked choc-cigars but so what? At least he was still honourable in retrospect ...hah! 'Was' honourable. He wanted to save himself for one female and settle down but that turned out great didn't it? 7 years on and he's turned bi, had various partners with no real desire of getting a life-mate, he had enough brothers to carry the line continue and all the other pressure of his family pride.

Miguel realised he was scowling into his drink and shook himself of the negative thoughts. Quite silly really to lament over childish matters of long lost virtues when he had found a contentment of who he was in recent years, happy in his body now, his fur painted in the black flames he always wanted and doing many of the things he wanted to do in life regardless of the stresses a modern life infringed on people.

"Hah the year is dead! Long live the year!" he toasted in jest; while not much would change at least the mentality of a clean start would do him good. Not long now till midnight.

Looking up he spotted the same black feline he'd seen at the bar making her way through the club in his general direction, perhaps she was just passing through to a different table?

The drink had been more an impulse gesture for a pretty female, common enough occurrence in any club, so he wasn't expecting the feline to seek him out. Drinking from his pint and watching her he mulled over the gamble, he wasn't too fussed about company in his present state of self-pity but curiosity about her spurred a hope she would. There was something else about her too, but he couldn't put his finger on it, more than being a simple physical attraction.

There was uproar of wooping laughter and high spirit antics from a close by table distracting him, chuckling and taking a deeper draught from his pint Miguel sighed reminded of things he'd get up to.

Seeing someone approach his tabled booth, he looked up to find standing at his tabled booth with a smile on her face and drink in hand, the black panther he'd seen at the bar.

"Hey" Miguel greeted, flashing a warm smile.

"Hi!" She replied smiling back.

Gazing up at her, Miguel now saw the distinctive leopard spots that lay under the darkness of her pelt, faded yellows breaking up the black of her fur and exposing those delightful mottled rossetta patterns. God if he had not wanted her before, he so did now, lingering over her chest where her fur became a lighter shade.

"Thanks for the drink handsome may I sit?" She asked, her posture radiating an interest in him as she too looked him over.

"I wasn't expecting company but sure, for one as beautiful as you, anytime." He commented hoping his speech wasn't slurred by drink too much.

"Why thankyou" She purred in that sultry voice nestling right up against him hand on his thigh and looking into his eyes with sparkling intelligence. "You look like you could do with some company to help celebrate bringing in the new year."

Miguel chuckled and bid her sit next to him; the company would do him some good, keep his mind occupied off other things.

"I'd very much like that" he rumbled appreciatively raising his glass to clink it with hers, pausing to looking into her eyes

"Tell me, you look familiar, have you been here before?"

Where had that thought come from?

She tilted her head looking at him reflecting on the question for a moment before shrugging nonchalantly.

"Nope, first time here." She replied taking a sip of her drink before putting it down and running a paw through his mane. Of course he hadn't seen her in here before he'd recognise an attractive face like hers, at least he would be sure of that, just a confused memory of someone he use to know.

"We have not met before don't think I'd forget someone as strong masculine and distinctive as you are."

"No? Well it must be fate, because I saw you in my dreams last night." Miguel smiled enjoying the attention unable to resist the chat up line.

"Oh really? That was just such a cheesy chat up line" Her laugh was rich and sultry, a delight to his ears.

"I guess it was....so apart from being beautiful what do you do for a living."

She laughed again and lent in close to touch his nose mischievously "Oh you!"

"I know I couldn't help it, but you are beautiful" He teased coyly placing an arm around her, paw resting on her hip. "where are my manners, I don't think we been acquainted"

"That's true, I'm Sheba pleased to meet you."

"I'm Miguel, very pleased to meet you."

Smiling at her and lifting her paw, lissing it before leaning into close to inhale her scent.

"Mmmmh you have such a delicious scent Sheba" Miguel rumbled being naughty and licking her exposed neck.

Responding with a pleasurable meow, Sheba nuzzled his cheek with a promiscuous feminine sound, sliding a leg over his as she took in his own musky scent.

"Why thankyou my dear lion, yours is irresistible"

Arching her chest and guiding his nose lower in flirtation letting him have a little more taste of what he so obviously desired.

Sheba had a mixed scent that reminded him of honey and cinnamon, sweet subtle aroma that made his mouth water.

"Though I must say, you've been a very naughty lion" She comment slyly drawing back to look him in the eye. "You've been playing both sides"

Ah he had been rumbled, not that he was making any effort to hide being with another male.

"A problem?" he posed kissing under her chin.

"mmmrrrr not really I like men that can be flexible" She answered truthfully nipping at his ear and running her nails down his chest.

"Though that not what intrigues me the most, you have unusual scent and appearance for a lion, mmm like these long ears of yours"

"A little species augmentation" Miguel informed her with a pleasurable rumble. "To show who I really am and make me all the more distinctive.

"I did notice, they do look rather fetching on you, very masterful mmh but tell me are you still all lion down there?"

She mused paw dropping to his crotch giving a playful touch.

"I am, maybe more so" He responded in a deep and masterful tone, as arousal built under that ever so light touch. "Care to find out?"

With a free paw touching her waist and sliding down her thigh thumbing with the hem of her dress he played with the idea of removing it. Somewhere in the back of his mind, his conscious chimed with a reminder that he was trying to give this up but in his intoxicated state his morals could go yiff in hell for all he cared, all that mattered now was the heat of moment giving into his animalistic cravings for fur against fur.

"mmmm sounds like an invitation" She whispered sliding a paw into his shirt unfastening one of the buttons.

"Only If you'd choose it to be...." he teased back leaving it open for her to choose as he stroke her thigh slipping under the dress.

Nuzzling paw to her cheek and giving her a gentle liss rejoiced in the contact between them, unable to help himself with her scent so tantalising, so delicious and hauntingly familiar.

"Why not, hell let's celebrate the new year with a bang" She declared , voice betraying the pent up desire kissing him fully on the lips.

"You read my mind" Miguel told her as she moved to sit on his lap wrapping her slender arms around his neck and still running her paws through his thick mane. He had to smile, everyone loved doing that, and he didn't need to know anything other than girls loved the feel of his mane.

Maybe this would be a good year after all, able to forget about his problems one more night as he looked up into her eyes and reflecting on having such a good looking girl in his arms. A black panther girl called Sheba, with honey and cinnamon scent. God he wanted her so bad.

"Sheba..." He murmured rubbing a paw along her back loving the way it sounded over his tongue.

"mmmm?" She replied, leaning back and smiling down on him looking radiant against the lighting.

"Just like the sound of your name that's all" Miguel rumbled vacantly as something struck a chord in his mind "tell me, I'm curious what is your full name?"

"Oh why would you want to know that?" She tilted her head with amusement evaluating him with cool amber eyes.

"To know if it were Haba'sheba by any chance"

Her expression was lost on Miguel as she looked at him, had he guessed wrongly? There was no way it could have been correct , just been a wild guess because there was no way this seductive mature feline could ever resemble the teen-crush he knew back in school. Names where easy to lie about just as scents were easily to disguise, but for an identical black panther to call herself Sheba and smell of that childhood fragrance the similarities were too dam alarming.

"Yes...that is my name, how did you know?"

Miguel felt suddenly all too cold and sober, staring up into those same amber eyes of his Ex-mate the one and only one he had ever been truly able to love.

"I...uhm....you....well this is going to sound awkward but I'm Miguel wayfarer, we dated back in school.

God he could feel all the confidence drain out of his feet and leave him floundering, mouth trembling open and shut with speechlessness sobering up in an instance.

It took a moment for that name to sink in before her eyes suddenly widened with shock.

"God it can't be?! But you look so different?

Miguel nodded slowly; fumbling Sheba immediately untangled herself from him and retreated further from him

"It is" he confirmed haltingly, failing to hold back the flood of emotions and grief at being re-acquainted, it was hopeless. Theirs had been a passionate teen romance, strong in intensity as it had been love but in the end it crashed and burned just as fast with one bad experience to bring the whole thing crashing around their ears.

She had been his first crush, a love that while it lasted had seen nothing but happiness against a back drop of troubled times and family rifts. Finding himself caught in the Miguel found his own conflicted emotions too much to bear and fearing he'd become just his father pushed Sheba away. It must have been hard to understand for her, but when told her she mutely accepted it in that faltering loving way. He missed her....yes he dam well missed her with that eternal hurt in his heart but he thought he had done the right thing so he could never hurt or betray her.

There was an awkwardness silence, the air thick with tension as the pair looked to each other not knowing what to say next.

Adjusting her dress and now looking anywhere but at him, Sheba posed.

"So how has it been?

"Good" Miguel replied looking intently into his drink, nervous as hell. "You?"

"The same, long time no see"

"Yerh It is isn't it ?"

She rubbed her arm and looking out into the crowd. " You never called"

"I couldn't not after what happened I don't think you would been able to bear it."

"I can handle a lot of things better than you think! My heart did break yes it did and it took a long time to heal!" You should have thought about that!

She snapped, but realising how bitter it sounded clasped a paw over her mouth.

"It's okay, you are right to be angry , you always were"

Miguel dipped his head in shame, it burnt him to be this close to her, he still loved her but so caught up in guilt afraid to admit it retreated further into himself. "It's all my fault for doing that to you, I wish I could take it all back and pretend it never happened but after what my father did..."

Sheba looked uncomfortable, her eyes watery with raw emotions, it was easy to see this affected her just as much as it did him. Caught in a dilemma she probably didn't know how to respond either, though she knew complicity his reasons for splitting up, it was obvious she still held resentment for the anguish she went through as well, the past left neither of them untouched.

Her hand hesitantly touched his, drawing his eyes to hers with a burdened look.

"I know that, but you're not him are you? It's in the past and he's long gone, can't you understand that, you are your own person."

"Aye...I do now, its taken me a while to understand that. Just wish it didn't have to happen and cause what happened between you and me, I mean."

She nodded scratching the back of her head looking to the floor.

"Its all in the past now isn't it, we've both grown up since then ."

"yes that's right" Miguel replied taking a deep gulp of his pint before setting it down gentle putting on a brave face on things even if he was falling apart inside, was there any hope at she still loved him? For her to look him in the eye and say all is forgiven. It just sounded so paffetic and conflicted, he didn't know what he wanted, maybe there was no hope at all for them.

"So brought you to this little club?" he ventured

"Oh, I heard about it through a friend, told me all about it being the best place in town to party out the end of the year"

"I hear that" Miguel smiled sombrely "What about your partner, they here too?"

Sheba's eyes flickered left to right, her composure slipping and showing glimmers of the vulnerable girl he once knew.

"No I'm still single, well I did have a partner, several since you left but for some reason the relationships never last always falling out over some small stupid reason." She confessed unable to but pour out her soul to him.

"After that I guess I just gave up and focused on my career, hours are a bit lousy but at least the pay's decent and pray will open new avenues in future for me."

"How is it going in the job? Doing alright?"

"Yerh, tasks are difficult at times but the people who I work with are great down to earth guys, it was to tell you the truth one of my female colleges who suggested this particular club. She's a bit of a wild card that one, says what's on her mind and a really knows how to party but she's been a good friend .This is her way of trying to cheer me up, insisting I ought to come here to forget about it all, drink party and get laid. "

Her voice dropped to an embarrassed whisper blushing under her fur.

"I see" Miguel chuckled, seeing Sheba blush further with embarrassment.

"She's here somewhere, after goading me into finding you she went hunting for a man herself. What about you?"

"Doing the same thing" he conceded finding talking with her gave him a level of contentment he seldom had, easing his burdened mind.

"So are seeing anyone?" She ventured.

"No, I have dated a few people in the past but it nothing long term."

"Oh..." She motioned, a claw tracing a circle on the table.

"It just never felt the same compared to what we had, my heart always belonged to you"

They lapsed into silence again lost to their own thoughts, unable to look each other straight in the eye neither noticed midnight was upon them.

The noise of the club took an dramatic increase as the music ceased and a countdown rippled across the entire club.

10!

9!

8!

7!

Feeling a paw put onto of her's Sheba looked up to see Miguel regard her with a soft gentle expression.

6!

5!

4!

Miguel couldn't say or do anything other than look at her, his mind being drained of thought as something passed between them.

3!

2!

1!

Sheba about to say something opened her mouth just as the club suddenly erupted into a cacophony of cheers, drwoning her out in a wall of noise.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!

Mirth rippled across Sheba's face, it struck her as funny and meekly withdrew, unable to find the courage again say it, so simply picked up her glass.

"Happy new year" She toasted

"Happy new year" Miguel chimmed clinking his glass against hers.

As they knocked back the last of their drinks as settle to watch to the others sing, Miguel's subconscious pulled him back to look at Sheba, his stomach knotted all over again.

He couldn't bring himself to ask his own question either, yet for all his fears and trepidation of what she'd think of him that persistent voice within him wouldn't let it lie.

Leaning forward, licking his dry lips and straining to keep the shakeyness from his voice called to her.

"Sheba?"

"Mmm?"

" I've missed you"

Sheba looked at him the casual smile of hers wavered; eyes open in a soft silent plea. Miguel's heart thumped at his chest waiting but no response was forthcoming.

"No I mean it, I'd give anything to have you back in my life."

"Yes I've missed you too" Sheba looked hesitant, voice was faint and distant, it looked hard for her to admit these feelings and in her ernest gaze he saw truth.

He slid both paws on the table towards her leaning forward low and staring deep into Sheba's eyes with a look of sincerity.

Miguel feared she what she was thinking and it knawed at his soul, willing to give anything to know what was going through her head, he had to make it right, to make her understand that he'd always be there for her.

Driven by a single clear thought he had to say it and say it right, he'd never felt so sure about anything in his entire life. He had to have her back in his life.

"I am sorry having ever having hurt you, ever. I've lived with regret in not standing up in what I believe in, which is that I love you with all my heart no matter what happens I want you to know you are the only girl I'd ever want, I'd do anything to have you back in my life."

Tears streaks down her cheeks, trembling as her lips quivered uncontrollably.

" I "Her voice was horse, looking flustered and at a loss.

Miguel remained where he was, utterly rooted to the spot by fear of rejection.

Sheba swayed, a conflict flaring in her mind. Did she still love him? Surely she still did?

"Yes...." She breathed, looking down and resting her head in a paw, "...no matter how hard I try, I can never get you out of my head, despite everything I admit still have love for you but how do I know you won't do anything like that to me again. I can not go through something like that ever again"

Miguel's throat seized up really feeling his words being weighed.

"Sheba....I promise to you, here and now, that I won't ever betray you. I love you utterly with all my heart and would do anything to make you happy. Please trust me when I say that I love you and never do it again.

"You mean it?" She asked slowly looking up at him.

"I do" He responded, overcome with emotions.

"Yes, I will go out with you again."

Oh gods, she loved him, she really did love him, Miguel thought and gazing back at her in reverence finding in un-spoken mutual needs drew her to him as they embraced and hugged wordlessly, tears in both of their eyes.