Vanities Shadow

Story by Tony D. Wolfe on SoFurry

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Content for mature audeince only. 18+ readers only, please don't blame it on me, I didn't make you read it! Enjoy! T.D.W. Copyright, 2003 Moon Drop Inc.

Vanities Shadow

by. Tony D. Wolfe

Wasn't always like this you know. Once I wasn't as caring as I am now, once I could toss them away like yesterdays leftovers. Maybe I've changed since then, grown up a little. Maybe I'm afraid of going back to that place though, maybe I think I can avoid it if I behave myself with what time I have left. I'm lucky no doubt about it, I shouldn't be here writing this. I guess you want to hear the story, don't you? How I ended up like this kind of. Why I'm apologizing to those countless people who's lives I ruined. This is my apology to all of you. I think most importantly though, you should at least know my name. It's Jon, short for Jonathon. My name is always important, probably the most important thing, otherwise no one would know what this was for.

Let me begin by saying, I'm gay, if you have a problem with that, tough. I'm also a wolf. One of my Ex's once told me that I was 'The vainest son of a bitch' they had ever met. I guess it's true, I mean I spend over an hour every morning in front of the mirror combing my fur, it has to be perfect. People have to see me, they have to want me. What's more, I have to have them wanting me. I would have never confessed to this before, but sometimes when you least expect it, reality will bite you in the ass.... What type of reality, that's another matter all together.

I think I look good, and all my ex's agreed with me at some point. Most people agree with me really, standing at six foot two inches, a soft gray fur. I constantly condition it, at least two times a day. It's important to shampoo as well, three times a week. You don't want it to be stiff, and shampoo tends to do that to fur after time. I have stark blue fur, well cut body, I like to keep it short just to show off. You can really tell how toned I am after a shower. I'm not overly built, cut would I guess be the way to describe it. I have no piercing's I would never do something that could possibly damage my body.

Don't get me wrong, I like the thought of giving people even more eye candy, but having metal objects protruding from my flesh... well that's just not me. I believe firmly in the fact that if I'm not enough to make someone fall head over heels then they are obviously not worth my time. Of course maybe they're wise to my ways, but no likely. Let me also say I am twenty-two years of age, a bit wiser than I was when I came out. However, I think my description of myself is more than sufficient, so let me stop procrastinating, and get on with my story then.

It all started five years ago, when I first came out of the closet so to speak. Letting the world know about my sexuality, of course those were rough times. Any fur will tell you that letting others know you're gay tends to put a damper on things for at least a little while. I was seventeen then, still in high school. I think the first guy I ever actively dated was the star quarter back of the football team. Of course he wasn't about to tell anyone he was a fag like me.

It angered me to be out of the closet and dating my love, only to be brushed off when I saw him in public. It was like I didn't exist to him while he was being mister popular. That's where I got the idea in the first place. Hurt them, but how was I going to hurt the star quarter back of the best football team in the region? The more I thought about it, the more I realized he was afraid of people knowing that he was gay. I knew what I had to do, I had to drag him out of the closet...

I decided to do it on his birthday, he promised we'd spend time together, up until this point we'd only pawed each other off, and exchanged blow jobs every once in a while, tonight would be different. I had it all set up, I had the camera, the microphones, everything. I even bought an aphrodisiac just to get him in the mood, just in case.

The sex was great, I mean it was wonderful, the best lay I had ever had, but he was also the first, probably why I remember it so vividly. He was well hung, ten inches at least, and when he screwed he went all out. It hurt at first I admit, but that paled in comparison to the pleasure I got out of it. Once it was over I took my camera and my pride out the door with me.

The next day I managed to convince one of the resident geeks at school to network all the TV's in the school together and play my tape. Sure I ended up having to give hi ma blow job, a big panther he was. Overweight, smelled funny, but I ruined my lovers life right then and there. He quit school a week later. It felt wonderful, I would have let the panther fuck me, but he wasn't into that sort of thing I guess. No sweat off my back as they say.

Of course I ended up getting beaten up a few times by various football players after that, but at least my wolf paid for what he did to me. I after he dropped out of school his parents kicked him out. Didn't matter at all to me. I think I saw him at one of the fast food joints around town.

Next was an older guy, an otter. His name was Chance, oh I loved him so much, even though he was my senior seven years. That wasn't important to me though, he was my friend, my lover, and he would be seen in public with me. He knew how to fuck, I think that was the most important thing of all. I just loved letting him screw me, I didn't like him tying me up to do it though.

I would beg and plead with him not to tie me up sometimes. I never won, he said it was good for me. I began to despise him for not caring about what I had to say when we were having sex. I decided I had to get back at him for it, I needed to hurt him. So once again I started planning.

My otter always loved children, he even ran his own daycare, we'd had sex there before, so I decided we would one last time. I showed up right after everyone left while he was still cleaning up form the days activities. I had a plan but I couldn't let him know I was there, it started with a bottle of ether, and a cloth rag. Before he knew something was wrong I had that cloth around his muzzle, he was out cold in a matter of seconds.

My plan was simple, I had brought all of his toys with me, his straps, his dildos, everything. I slowly began to tie him up in the same manner he usually tied me up in, on all fours. I shoved one of his vibrating dildos up his tail and pulled a picture of a child off his wall, a small otter boy he cared for at the daycare. With a little coaxing and a good paw job I got him off all over that picture and then left, calling the police telling them something was amiss at the center.

He was tried and convicted for suspected child abuse four months latter, oh well, no skin off my back. He deserved it, he shouldn't have tied me up. I never knew he admitted to it all, he knew it was me who did this to him, he didn't want me to get in trouble, I know now, but I guess that's what happens sometimes.

My next conquest as I was starting to call them, was a mouse. A real sweet heart, he'd never hurt me, and he loved me, that was important. They had to love me, adore me, want me. If they didn't they needed to go away. His name was David, and I loved him. He gave great blow jobs, but I think he was just too sweet. So I brought someone else home. A boy roughly my age, eighteen then, another mouse no less. I made David watch that mouse screw me right in front of him. I knew I loved getting topped by then, it was wonderful, I had no urge to want to be the top myself.

Honestly though, I wasn't such a bad guy, the mouse got over me, after trying for months to make me come back to him. He moved on and became a better person in my opinion. Moving on though, I decided to keep going on the cute furs streak I'd been going on. I found Benny the bunny. He was strange, a goth boy, he died his fur red and black, he was into all sorts of things. He wouldn't tie me up if I didn't want to be, he was perfect in my opinion. He had a huge cock too, bigger than that jock I dated so long ago. Nearly thirteen inches, and he was a rabbit. He fucked me for more than I was worth every day, sometimes two or three times a day. I let Benny tie me up sometimes, I thought he deserved to do those things to me. After all he gave me that huge bunny cock of his night after night, he always made me orgasm at least twice a night, it was a rule. He would cum at least one, and for every time he came I had to cum twice.

Life was good, I had a boyfriend who was affectionate, wonderful in bed, and he knew how to make a wolf howl for more. What made me not like him though, well that was he was into water sports. He liked to piss on me, I thought I could tolerate that and be happy with him, I was his sub, and he was my dom. I didn't mind at first, it was kinky, and I was beginning to like kinky. I was even starting to enjoy being tied up while he fucked me, it was usually on those nights he fucked me our or five times. Can you imagine having two orgasms every hour, and still wanting more?

Like all my boyfriends though, he took it too far one night, he got into one of his super water sports moods. He had me tied up, and he shoved that flaccid penis of his into my tight hole. Then he began to piss on me, he'd made me swallow his piss before, I hated it. It made me look stupid and urine is not a smell you want on your fur. Yeah getting pissed in made me orgasm, but it made me mad.

The very next day I found the biggest meanest looking wolf I could, and begged him to fuck me. I didn't take this wolf home with me though, I started sleeping with him just as often as I slept with my Benny, finally though my bunny found out I was sleeping around on him. How was I supposed to know my boy was suicidal? I went to the funeral with my new wolf, who got dumped right after Benny was gone though. No one wanted me at the funeral, but I came anyway, I thought I should at least piss on his grave, it's what he would have wanted after all.

Now by the time Benny died I was twenty, I'd been getting screwed by that rabbit for the better part of two years. It was a memorable time, we even had our own apartment. I missed my bunny definitely, but at the same time I missed having random sex partners even more. About a month after Benny died I'd called some friends over for a party at my place. It was mine now after all. I spiked the punch with a strong aphrodisiac that night, and let them all gang bang me at the tail end oft he party. Six or seven furs waiting their turn to screw my brains our.

That's how I found Nathan, a big draft horse, huge cock. I mean his cock was a big around as my arm and almost seventeen inches long hard. That's heaven right there for all you subs reading this. Having a nice hard horse cock pumping you. Only problem was he never lasted long in bed, and wasn't really ready to do it more than once. I hated that about him, I started cheating on him too.

Everyone I brought into my room was eventually going to get cheated on because none of them were good enough for me. In one year I had at least twenty boyfriends. I had to find a whole other group of friends at one point, just to start the cycle one more time. Another Orgy, I made it known to them all that I wanted every last one of them to fuck me. I always got what I wanted.

I'm not sure why, but every time I cheated on someone else, I felt a little better about myself, like I was wanted. At the same time though, I felt a little part of myself die, it didn't matter, I barely felt it. Another conquest, another body in my bed, another cock in my tail hole. I was beginning to worry though, it had been a year since Benny had died, and I still left his picture on my wall, at first I tried telling myself I left it there to show him what I was doing.

I was lying to myself though, it was there because I couldn't take it down, I missed my bunny so much, I didn't want to think about it though, so I kept sleeping around. Four months before I turned twenty two it happened, the car crash, the pivotal moment in my life that would change me forever. I hit a tree, or maybe the tree hit me, I don't remember, either way though it left me in a coma, and that's where my story really begins.

When I woke up, I found myself tied up, with a ball gag in my muzzle, my legs spread by a rod iron bar, my arms tied behind my back staring at a black and red rabbit, my bunny. Benny, but Benny was dead, I knew he was. He simply stood there in the buff staring at me with hate filled eyes.

I think now might be a good time to tell you, I had been having dreams of my bunny since he died, he was always crying, asking me to love him again, and I was always walking away, never looking back. I hoped maybe this was another dream, but I felt my bonds a little too well, that ball gag spread my muzzle a bit painfully, there was no way this was a dream.

"Why did you hurt me?" Benny asked looking down at me, his voice was so callus, so angry with me, I knew he was mad. I couldn't answer him, I wanted to, I was trying too.

"I loved you so much puppy," Benny said staring down at me, a tear coming to his eyes. "Why did you cheat on me? Why do you always hurt the people who love you?" He started asking me these questions, it hurt to hear him question me like this.

"All I wanted was to make you happy," he continued on. Those tears became more vibrant, fuller, I could see them clearly now. "You hurt all those people, and you know I made you happy. I did, I know I did, but you still cheated on me, just to get back at me for one mistake. You could have asked me to stop, I wouldn't have done it." Benny sighed softly walking over to me, kneeling down next to me, at my side and smiled.

"You hurt so many people puppy," Benny started. "Now, I have to hurt you. I have to make you see why you can't do that to people. Remember puppy, I love you, and I always will." He extended one of his paws and gripped my sheath gently, slowly stroking it, slowly but surely getting me nice and erect, as I laid there and squirmed.

"You have to know though puppy," Benny said again watching my canine member sit at attention. "This is for your own good. One day we can be together again if you want. It can be like it never happened... Wouldn't that be wonderful? Like you never killed me." His voice was so cold, I wanted to cry, tell him that I loved him.

I saw something though, a small glass tube, he grabbed my cock smiling, and with a slight sigh he slid that piece of glass tubing into my cock, and then shoved it down pas the tip. It burned horribly, I nearly screamed when I felt it. He started slowly pawing me off smiling. With a sudden jerk, he bent my cock at a ninety degree angle, and I felt that tubing break I felt the blood star pouring. I felt the glass, then he continued to paw me off kneeling next to me as the blood started pouring from my cock tip.

The pain was unbearable, I was screaming I could feel the shards digging into my cock cutting me, horribly, but Benny didn't seem to notice. He just continued upon his merry way pawing me off, amazingly I felt an orgasm hit, cum sprayed from my cock, red cum. and then he let go, lapping his perfect little paw clean as he stood with a smile.

"It isn't all bad you know," he told me, but I wasn't paying attention I felt my cock shrinking, and the glass cutting deeper, it was the most horrible feeling. Being cut form the inside out. One by one the sharps of glass were spit form the end of my cock. One by one broken shards fell to my belly, laying there coated in blood and cum.

"Oh don't worry, you'll feel better in a few minutes," Benny soothed me, or tried, true enough the blood had stopped flowing as my cock stopped hurting so bad. I almost felt as good as new. He stared down at me, then smiled again. "Ok, now let's get you cleaned up sweetie." he cooed a bit pulling his sheath back a bit to release his flaccid member, and all at once I knew what he was going to do.

"You see, there's now showers here," he began smiling. "But we can still enjoy some of the old things we used to." He smiled nice and big, he knew I hated this, he knew I did. I don't think it really mattered to him though, considering what he had just done to me.

He nodded just a tad, and that yellow stinking liquid began spraying all over me, it was horrible, the stench was worse than I remembered it. It was then I noticed the ball gag that had been in my muzzle had been replaced by a ring gag. Another of Benny's favorite types of gags. He straddled my chest still pissing that reached fluid.

Moments later that soft bunny cock was in my muzzle flushing my mouth out, I was forced to swallow when he pinched my nose closed, and sat there for only a few more seconds before it all stopped, and I was thoroughly soaked, he'd washed me down with it. It was then he slid back on my chest and let his soft member slowly get harder rising for an occasion.

"See it's not so bad," Benny told me with that famous smile he had. He only smiled while he was with me as far as I knew. He jerked that ring gag out of my muzzle roughly as a matter of fact, I thought he had jerked out a tooth with it. "I mean here we are, having fun like always. It could be like this forever you know, you and me..."

"B..b...b...Benny.... Why did you do that to me?" I asked him whimpering softly staring at my bunny.

"Because you were bad, and we're going to have to keep punishing you," he nodded softly. "You're a bad dog, and you must be punished for what you did to me, and to all those others."

"Why did you have to die Benny?" I asked him again.

"Because you stopped loving me," He responded. "But that's ok, you and me are together again, and that's all that matters. Unfortunately puppy it can't be like old times just yet. I was told I could have you again, for as long as I wanted, but I had to hurt you first, I had to hurt you bad. Punish you for all the things you've done."

"Why you though?" I asked but he waved it off he turned around on my and leaned down over my sheath. Amazingly it jumped up and out of it's home good as new, like it was expecting him.

"While you're here, your body is mine puppy," Benny told me and then I saw something disturbing, a long snake like tongue began to slither down and out of his muzzle. Moments later it began slipping down into my member. I could feel it searching through my body, and finally it made it's way into my balls and I felt a sucking sensation.

It lasted for a minute or two before Benny stood back up and turned around to smile at me.. In his hand was a hammer, he almost seemed sorry, I saw a white substance coating his lips, it was confusing, then I realized what must have happened. He must have sucked all the cum out of my balls.

"Sorry, I didn't want to waste any of it," Benny said, like he was responding to my thoughts. That's when he kneeled down next to me and with one strike of the hammer I felt one of my balls explode in agony. The type of pain that makes you feel like you should die, the type of pain that people pass out from. I didn't though, I was wide awake while that now bloody hammer came up again and struck again. Twice the agony, I wanted to die right then and there, but my bunny wasn't done.

"I'm sorry hun," Benny told me, as my screams echoed through where ever the hell we were. He then produced a metal coat hanger from god knows where. As it was unraveled I noticed a small batter charger at his side, nipple clamps. The voltage was what scared me. One million volts. What was he planning on doing....?

The slender metal rod was suddenly, and forcefully shoved down my still erect member. Why was I still erect? Oh yeah, he told me why. This is where my body was his. I didn't want to believe it, obviously this was some sort of bad dream brought on by the trauma of the car crash I was in. I hadn't noticed that my balls had stopped Aching, nor did I notice the hammer being picked back up by my bunny. What I did notice though, was the feeling of one of my balls exploding in pain once again, I started screaming again.

Benny smiled a bit and kissed me gently, I wanted to kill him all over again suddenly, but that was a passing thought, not one I could hold onto. That's when he hooked up the battery charger, it was still off thankfully. A moment passed and he attached the nipple clamps, not to me but himself murring softly to himself. That's when I saw what he had planned for my nipples, two rusted fish hooks.

One at a time he shoved them through my nipples and jerked them nice and hard, setting the hook. Then he started hooking the battery charger up to those as well, and then sat back next to the battery charger, rubbing himself erect in a matter of minutes, that nice glistening bunny cock I lusted after for so long. Then as he began to paw off he turned the power of the charger on.

I still can't recall if I was really screaming or if I thought I was. For nearly three hours I was sitting there feeling the electricity course through me, and every time I started to cope my bunny turned it up. I never noticed that every time he orgasmed a mix of blood and cum spurted form his erect cock, nor did I notice he was usually spraying his load all over my face. I drank it without question just enjoying the simple pleasures my bunny would afford me.

After all of this time I spent writing in agony on the floor it suddenly stopped. the loss of all sensory input soon followed. It wasn't going to last though, moments after I passed out he was there again. This time I was on all fours though. He was standing in front of my with his cock hanging in front of my muzzle, I couldn't move, I didn't feel the bonds anymore, but I couldn't move.

"I told you, I own your body while you're with me now," he smiled that sweet smile and walked behind me. "I figured I owed you one last fuck for old times sake. Their way though." And that's when I felt my bunny's cock slip into me. A moment later I felt something else, spikes were growing from my Bunny's member, and he began to thrust ripping me apart form the inside out, again I screamed, but I could barely do that. My muzzle wouldn't open, my throat wouldn't respond. I didn't know if I was breathing, but worst of all, I was being ripped apart at the seems.

As quickly as it began I felt him cum in me. I was glad it was over, and then he walked in front of me and smiled wide, his cock was black brown, bloody and covered in his own semen.

"Open wide puppy," he commanded, and I did so. "Now clean my cock off." I wrapped my muzzle around it, repulsed by it's very existence, and began to suck all that fluid off, gagging, my body tried to reject it, but somehow I didn't vomit. Finally after all of this, I was allowed to sleep... and maybe recover. I didn't though, the whole night I laid there in a puddle of never ending blood, hugging Benny, even though I didn't want to, I wanted to get away.

I can't believe those thoughts would even occur in my head during those darker days I spent with my bunny. I need to skip most of the other things he did to me, you get the point. It was bad, I've been skinned alive, and fucked while it was going on, by my bunny. I don't blame him, he was only trying to get me to spend the rest of eternity with him.

I wanted to tell him yes the day he came to me, not to hurt me more, because in the six months I lay in the hospital trapped in my own hell, he'd hurt me, time and again. A thousand times over. Every night we would sleep together, even though for those six months I never slept, because I was already asleep.

The day he came to me with news I was going to be waking up, and the punishment was over. He asked me to stay with him, he asked me to stay by his side, and love him forever. I couldn't say yes though, after all I'd seen the dark, now I wanted to go home and be alive again.

"I understand," Benny said, tears welling up in those beautiful eyes of his. "When you die, we can be together again. I promise." He said whimpering softly.

"No Benny," I said. "I don't love you anymore...." With that, I saw the anger in him expand a thousand fold, but before he had a chance to retaliate he was gone, and I was awake....

The end.

(Sorry to leave off like this, but sometimes the imagination of others fills the end out much better. T.D.W.)