Lettera D'Amore - Love Letter
My surprise to Gritou for our sixth month together.
To my dearest,
I wanted to make something special for this day, the day that marks our first six months together, I thought so much on what to do, and decided that I would do the thing I can do best, write this letter for you, coming from the bottom of my heart, so that written word can be a declaration of my love for you.
You have brought so much happiness in my life, and you do that with each message you write to me, with each conversation we have, with your marvelous voice and your laugh, with each small gesture of your body. Everything you do make me feel like that, as the most loved man in the world.
But my happiness doesn't only come from what you do, what makes me so happy it's your own happiness, to help you when you need it, to cheer you up after a bad day, to make you laugh with my goofiness. I am the most happy when you smile back at me my love, that's the truth.
I wouldn't have dreamt in the past to feel such joy because of a man, but here you are babe, proving that it is possible. You came to me that day, so many months ago, asking for a simple talk, to befriend me, and from that simple message we both found what we were searching for all of our lives.
Do you remember those first talks? How eager we were to know each other? Even back then I was curious about you, about the things you liked and what you did, probably because you were the first person I ever met who knew I was gay. I was so much surprised to discover, bit by bit, how much in common we have, and how you make me laugh with your jokes and puns, something I love so dearly in you.
From the start you were there for me, to help with my coming out, something I was barely thinking of before all this happened but that began to become true thanks to you, babe, with you helping me, telling me how it went for you, showing me what to do and cheering for me even if you lived far away.
You were there when I finally managed to come out, in spirit at least, and we were so happy for that, both of us. Then there was that vacation, the one that made clear to both of us how our feelings had grown out of the mere friendship, and then we confessed, with each other fearing the other didn't feel the same. But we did babe, and we do.
I must confess I was giddy for the next few days, and I was very excited and babbling like a schoolgirl with a crush when I told my friends, but I was justified, because a wonderful man loved me.
From that moment the wait, for you to come here in Roma, to finally meet each other, to be finally together. It was almost excruciating, seeing the time slowly running toward that magical moment second by second, day by day. The moment I held you in my arms was the best in my life, with our lips meeting and us not caring of what happened around us.
Those days were magical, walking together through the streets of my city, talking and laughing, admiring the sights, those are among my cherished memories. They were so perfect, and blow away any doubts, if little, they were about us, that maybe we won't work in real life, that you wouldn't like me outside of the written messages. But it wasn't the case, and everything was perfect, you were perfect, chatting with my friends, trying to speak a little of Italian even if you were rusty.
Then, you went back to Lyon, and I felt like my heart was been ripped from my chest. I wasn't ready for that, not after so little time, four days weren't enough, and my tears proved that, falling from my cheeks in my trip back home. I still don't know how my family didn't see me so distressed, but I'm happy they didn't.
My sadness was washed away with our talks, this time on Skype too, talking so much to each other, about silly stuff sometimes but that what conversation between lovers are sometimes. We had already decided that I would have come to Lyon on the summer, but it was only then that we began to plan about it.
It wasn't easy, my parents shouldn't know about us, first because I wasn't out yet to them, second because it was too soon and we both wanted to wait after those weeks before telling both our families. So, another waiting took place, longer this time, but maybe easier to bear, thanks to the frequent talks we had, even if it was a busy period for the both of us at the time.
And it was in that period that I took an important resolution, one of the most important ones, to come out to my family. You gave me the much need push in that direction, you encouraged me and cheered me up when stupid , irrational fears appearing from time to time, to be reject from my family, to lose them.
But that was proven wrong, my family accepted and accepts me, my brother first, then my parents, even if they had a bit of a hard time with that they were happy for me. Then, I told them that I was going to Lyon for weeks, to improve my French that, for some kind of sweet joke of the Fate, I started studying almost a year from now, much before we began even to talk, when you were only a familiar name among the many comments. Most people still don't believe that luck.
And the day I flew to you came, and I was excited, and nervous, to be with you two entire weeks, to live with you, to meet your friends, to do so many things with you. And everything was as amazing as I imagined, cooking with you, helping with the house, watching movies with you, playing with you, making me discover Diablo III and Doctor Who. Some might think those are normal things, even silly ones, but they meant the world to me, because I was doing them with you.
We met your friends, and my minimal skills in the language of Hugo were used at their fullest. Even if I didn't understand everything they said, and I wasn't as good as I am in English to speak my mind, we got along, and they liked me, as you said to me, I'm just glad they did, because it's what I wanted, since they meant so much to you.
You did so many romantic things, like bringing me to that amusing park, and the surprise week-end to Annecy, so romantic my love, no one ever did that for me, I thank you for that. Living as a normal couple, doing stuff as a couple, it's what I wanted all my life, and you gave me that to me, so thank you babe.
Then, those weeks ended, even if time seemed to go so slow during them. We said goodbye in the airport, both a little sad but still high on love, for how well it went, for me being liked by your friends. I was sad during my flight, but remembering the good moments together helped me a lot.
I told my family as soon as possible who you are, why I went there in Lyon, and how much you mean to me. My parents were angry at first for me hiding that, but they were also happy, even if they are having a hard time to adjust to this new situation. But you understand, that's all that matters, and having you at my side makes me stronger, nothing else really matters.
From then, we were freer to talk, and we had issues to overcome sometimes but we did with our openness to communicate and support each other no matter what. Sometimes I felt like I didn't deserve you, but they were brief moments, and they passed so quickly, and you were so swift to crush them with your love that now I don't have those doubts anymore.
And now we are at this sixth anniversary, with so much to have been done during these months but so much more to do in the coming months and years. We have short term goals, like my next visit there in Lyon or yours here in Roma, and long term ones, our true goals, the ones we are approaching step by step, until we will fulfill them.
And I want them to be fulfilled, to come true, because all I dream it the time when we will finally be together for real, in a place of our own, working and living, always together. Because you mean the world to me, the only man I love, the only one with whom I want to pass my life with. We will get there babe, together we will, and we will reach that happiness.
So this is my surprise for you babe, a letter to you, a love letter, to show you how much I love you, even if you already knew that. With this I wanted to show everyone how deep my love for you is, to put words to these immense feelings I have, even if words will never be able to describe them perfectly, something only a kiss can.
I love you, je t'aime, ti amo.
Your wolf.