FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

Well, this took a bit longer than i'd expected haha. Life is back in teh fullswing of things, but a bit shockingly it seems studying and what not makes me want to write; though i'm unsure if that's a good or bad thing. Welp, enjoy and if you have any comments or critquies please let me know!

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"Marion...I'm your son's chemistry teacher," Ben said, followed by a few moments of silence.

"Oh, geez...you scared me Ben," Marion said after a minute, giving a sigh of relief, "I thought you were being serious," he said with a weak chuckle, still not quite feeling the joke was appropriate. After all, Ben knew how nervous he was in this kind of situation, though perhaps the joke was funnier if he didn't take it seriously.

"W--What?" Ben asked, looking up quickly at the wolf. He felt hot under his shirt and wondered just what to do. The wolf had to be lying. There was no way he wasn't Chris's father--the two looked just alike. He grimaced and his brow furrowed in thought, analyzing fully the image of the pup in his head and that of the wolf before him. Facial structures: the same. Fur color and even the thickness: the same. Body size: the same.

"At the full house I meet Chris's teacher," Marion said, absolutely sure the bear just had another wolf with black fur in a class. "Mr. G--"

"Grefor," Ben completed the name for the wolf. "Yes...he was let go and I took his place in the science department,"

Now came the reaction. Ben watched as Marion's eyes dilated again and the wolf seemed to view him like he'd been stalking him. He felt a cold chill run all over his body, and yet still felt blood rushing all around him. Unconsciously he moved a paw up to his shirt and unbuttoned the top button, to cool down just a bit. Could he date Marion? Was it appropriate to date Marion? Would the wolf even want to date him?

"W--But...I...No, it still says Mr. Grefor on Chris's report cards," Marion said, willing to take the bear to his house and show him such.

"Yes...bu--but, didn't Chris give you the paper that told you about Mr. Grefor was being let go? It was very detailed and listed my credentials. I've been there for nearly two months now," Ben replied, but knew all too well how it went.

_"OK class...since Mr. Grefor had to take a leave of absence and as such I'll be taking over for the remainder of the year as your teacher; it's a pleasure to meet you. Now, I have this paper that I want you to give to your parents, it'll explain to them who I am and if they have any questions I've left a method of getting into contact with me. Thanks...now...I guess we can just dive right in?" he'd said, having even sent out e-mails to the parents who had provided their e-mail addresses. But it was stupid to assume all the young furs had given their parents the papers. After all, as a cub himself, had he really given his parents all the papers and forms from his teachers if they didn't need to be signed? _

"I...I never got that paper," Marion said, but he knew it was entirely likely. Chris wasn't exactly renowned at remembering to give him papers to sign. At the open house most of the teachers just had him sign the syllabus forms there. And even after that his son usually told him he forged his signature--which he told Chris to be careful about. He looked back at the bear and then pictured Ben up at a board--plaid shirt and axe in paw while he told them the most effective chopping spot on a tree--as he taught. He...he's...not a lumberjack....

Crap... Ben thought, frowning at the wolf and waiting for Marion to get up and leave without a word. Still, Marion didn't move. After a minute of silence Ben cleared his throat, which caused Marion's head to jerk up to see him. He tried his best to smile at the wolf, but it ended in a half-smile half-frown before he looked away and bit his lower lip.

"So..."

"Yeah...." Ben said, and let out a sigh. He couldn't help but imagine this is what Marion had expected his reaction to be to hearing he had been a father. Then again, Ben sighed and wished he wasn't so great at one-uping others when it came to surprises. Marion turns out to be a dad, and he just happens to end up being Marion's son's teacher--it was a funny cycle he was sure, if it wasn't so concerning at the moment.

"Heh..."

Ben looked up at the ceiling, as if hoping some divinity would find a bit of kindness and give them the strength to burst out laughing at the coincidence. No such thing happened though. He looked clumsily back down at the wolf--though he didn't know what quite qualified as a clumsy look, aside from how frantically he looked away when their eyes met.

"Is...he doing well?" Marion asked, the question coming out slowly and feeling heavy on his tongue.

Ben's eyes darted to the wolf, and on Marion's features he found a warm--if not nervous--smile, and the same uncertainty he felt. It helped; more than anything else at that point could have. He gave his own smile, "Y--Yeah...very bright,"

Well...at least I don't have to ask if he likes kids...or I don't think he'd be a teacher... Marion thought and gave his best smile, "I...I think we made a huge mistake,"

The frown came instantly. Ben prepared himself to apologize and never see the wolf again.

"I mean...we really should've told each other about our jobs first," Marion continued. He looked up and noticed the look on the bear's face, which made him feel worse. Without meaning to he put his paw over the bear's, "I...I'm not breaking up with you Ben,"

"What?" the question escaped Ben's muzzle before he had time to think.

"I--I mean...you know...I don't want to...and..." Marion said and looked away. A sigh escaped his lips and he stared down at the table for a few moments. A minute passed, and there could've been more that followed but Marion wondered what he was supposed to do. "C--Can you date me?"

Ben looked over at the wolf and then away. The minutes had passed by very quickly because he'd been in his own little world. There were no rules about it, but the staff didn't even know he was gay. He hadn't signed any type of papers that said he couldn't date the parent of a student--in fact, he knew that Mrs. Green had a son just a year below the age group she taught. After a few more seconds of thought Ben turned his paws around under Marion's and gently held onto the wolf's, "There aren't any rules against it...I think......"

An equal sense of happiness and anxiety filled Marion's heart and head. On one paw, he would be able to continue dating the bear--on the other paw, he would be able to continue dating the bear. The very benefit was the problem. Why should it be a problem? I mean...sure, he's dating Chris, but...Oh God...what if he tells Chris?! "You won't tell Chris will you?"

The suddenness and fear in the wolf's voice made Ben's throat constrict. Even though he'd guessed the wolf hadn't told his son he was dating simply by the fact of how shy and reserved Marion was when he told him he was a father: the wolf wasn't the type of tell his son he was dating someone so soon. Still, the question took him off guard. "I--I...Uhh...No. No, I won't...I mean...not if you don't want me to," Ben stammered, unsure of the morality of the entire statement. Didn't Chris deserve to know?

Marion felt relief flood through him. But I can't lie to him! I...I have to tell him! But, what if he hates me? How do I even begin explaining it? What kind of wolf has a pup--when he's gay!? I mean...oh I know I love him...I wouldn't trade it for the world. Maybe it's just being gay is a curse for parents.........yeah, cause that makes sense Marion thought with a roll of his eyes.

Throughout his entire internal battle Marion had been making odd faces and looking away. Ben cocked his head and waited for the wolf to look back at him, or to say something--anything. But that didn't happen. After a minute Ben felt the need to remind the wolf he was even in front of him by gently squeezing the wolf's paw. The fact that they had their paws together still--it was the only comfort he felt from the strange turn of events.

Marion looked back up at the bear and felt a pull in his heart and couldn't help but feel a bit better. Ben was sitting there, their paws together, his head cocked, and a inquisitive look on his muzzle. The very fact that he could make him feel relieved only made him feel a bit more relived--a dual increase to him. A sigh escaped him before he began to speak. "Ben...I...haven't told Chris--"

"That we're dating," Ben interjected, giving an encouraging smile to the wolf. "I get it Marion, I know, from talking with some of the parents of my students, that it can be hard to be separated and tell your son you're dati--"

"No...Ben...Chris doesn't even know I'm gay," Marion interrupted, and immediately saw the look of surprise of the bear's features. Perhaps Ben just analyzed things quickly, or the bear was numb to being surprised for long by now, but his face quickly became one of a calmer nature. Marion let out a sigh and shook his head, "I...Well, I mean...his mother passed away about three years ago,"

"I'm sorry," Ben said, but could already tell why Marion had winced when he'd asked how he became a single father. That still didn't answer a lot, but it clearly explained why the topic was off limits.

Marion nodded and looked away. He didn't want to tell Ben anymore about Nancy than that at the moment. Besides, that was Chris's story so much more than it was his. "I've only been with Chris for coming up on three years. I mean...technically it's been twenty-eight months. And...I love him. I mean, he's my son," he said, looking into the bear's eyes as if he could portray the statement better with a stare. "I just haven't found the right time to tell him that I'm gay. I mean, the first year I didn't even think about dating--didn't even think about my sexuality. Later I thought about it, and...I'm a coward Ben: I'm scared what he'd think of me,"

Ben wondered if he could somehow find out the pup's feelings about it, but the thought quickly went away. What way could there ever be to find out the pup's feelings through chemistry? Perhaps a fake chemical that made furs gays and a balancing equation? He threw the idea away by just how stupid it was; not to mention the other teachers would be more than curious about such a thing. It wasn't exactly appropriate to just plain ask the pup either. And most importantly it wasn't any of his business.

"I'm sorry...."

Ben looked back up at the wolf and shook his head, "Hey...I...Well, I certainly don't think I can judge you," he said and gave a weak chuckle, "I've never had a boyfriend who had a son..."

"Kind of strange, isn't it?" Marion asked, scratching the back of his head nervously. Still, as unbelievable as it was, he couldn't help at marvel at two things. The first was his relief. Despite the shock, a part of him was relieved; relieved his son already knew Ben and the second was that he knew Ben did like pups.

"So...umm...I guess I shouldn't ask if he tells you about class," Ben said, giving a nervous chuckle.

"No...I mean, I ask him everyday and we talk, but...he usually just says 'my teacher' or something to that effect; no names," Marion replied, letting out a small sigh. After a moment he took in a deep breath, calmed himself and looked back at the bear, "So...I didn't ever ask you......do you still want to go out with me?"

Ben stared at the wolf for a few moments and a gruff laugh escaped his muzzle. It built to a short but certainly deep, bearish laugh. Once he managed to stifle it he nodded quickly, "Yes...I was scared you would want us to pretend this never happened honestly,"

"Well, honestly...I'm still shocked you're not a lumberjack..."

The tension in the room seemed to melt with each word. Ben's eyes widened and he cocked his head, "A lumberjack?"

"Yeah--ever since I met you back at the grocery store--which I swear happened,"

"Uh-huh..." Ben said, still a bit put off on the wolf remembering such a trivial even; one he had yet to call back to mind.

"Well...since then I've just thought you were a lumberjack,"

"Did I smell of woodchips? I did redo the floor at my place a few years back..."

"No, no...Umm..." Marion said and laughed a little. Did the bear really not see it? The plaid shirt tucked into a pair of jeans, dark boots, and his physique all screamed 'I cut down trees for a living' to him. After a second he pointed across the table at the bear, "You look like a lumberjack..."

"What?" Ben asked incredulously, and then looked down at himself. He stared for a few moments and then looked back at the wolf, "No I don't..."

"Yes you do,"

"You're stereotyping...just cause I'm from up North," Ben said, throwing in a mock sense of insult.

"Hardly," Marion said with a laugh, "You look like one, I swear,"

Ben smirked a little and shook his head, "A difference of opinions...I just happen to think that plaid is stylish I'll have you know,"

"Oh...just like a northerner to have no sense of style," Marion said with a smirk of his own, "Oh, and that was stereotyping,"

After a few hours Marion found himself walking around the block with Ben for the eighth time, each time they promised to leave the next time. It was Friday though, so there was no need to rush. And on top of that it was a long weekend, a more than added bonus. The tension seemed gone. It had taken awhile but he'd slowly gotten Ben to at least accept the notion he might look like a lumberjack. The entire thing had been one long joking talk--and despite his insecurities Marion felt completely sure in his choice to continue dating Ben. After all, he was gay, and it wasn't like that was going to change. He would tell...Chris...

"You OK?" Ben asked, looking down at the wolf. They were entering the parking garage where the wolf had parked, the fading sun seeping in through the opening and painting the entire place a rural orange.

Marion nodded and shrugged his shoulders, "I'm still worried about Chris's reaction to this entire thing.......does he seem to like you?"

"I'm a teacher Marion...I'm pretty well hated by all my students," Ben replied with a laugh, but seeing the look on Marion's face quickly straightened up, "But quite honestly...I've never spoken with him directly, aside from a quick 'good job' on a test,"

"Oh...."

"But he's a good pup...just like his dad,"

Marion felt heat run into his cheeks as he smiled up at the bear, "Thanks..."

"So....do you plan to tell him?"

"Yeah...I've been working on that one ever since our first date....you know, the one at the coffee house?"

"Oh...yeah," Ben replied, recalling this instance unlike the grocery store. "I don't want to pressure you Marion,"

"But you do want me to tell him don't you?" Marion asked, looking more solemly over at the bear than he since eating with him. They had joked, laughed, told stories, and just grown closer in general; it--for the first time in years--felt like he was a pup again with a date.

Ben nodded slowly and looked away, "If...if we're going to be a serious couple one day, or even pursue this...I don't want to have to be in the shadows all the time. I understand your hesitation--as best I can at least--but I just...."

"I know Ben...I've always known. It's not fair to you, and it's not fair to Chris...." Marion said and let out a sigh, "I just don't want things to change between us," he said and found himself finally facing his car. He looked at it, and then at Ben, "I....I plan to tell him soon..."

"Marion, please don't think I'm rushing you on this..." Ben said, shaking his head, "I don't expect you to just drop a bomb on him..."

"I..." Marion said and looked away. The sun seemed to penetrate the city sky brilliantly, as if just off the horizon there was an entirely different world. He shook his head slowly and then shrugged his shoulders, "I still don't know how to tell him; any ideas?"

Ben chuckled lightly along with the wolf and shrugged his shoulders. A moment passed and he swallowed the lump in his throat, it was obvious they were just buying time now. He knew Marion had to go eventually--and sadly he knew there was a stack of quizzes waiting for him back home too.

"Well...it was a good date Ben...you know, after a bit of a shaky start,"

"I think everything we've done has had a shaky start," Ben said with a tiny laugh.

"I hope things...well...you know, get more steady as it goes--in everyway possible" Marion said, thinking about the idea of his dates with Ben becoming more and more regular.

"You'll be fine Marion," Ben said, smiling encouragingly at the wolf. Taking a tentative step forward he put an arm around his boyfriend, and after finding how easily Marion slipped into the embrace increased his grip.

"Thanks Ben..." Marion said, unsure the last time he'd been able to lean on anyone else. If memory served, it was probably at least ten years ago--if that short a time frame. A heavy sigh escaped with his next breath, followed by an increased pull from the bear. It may have been a minute, or it could've been half an hour, but eventually Marion was aware that they hadn't moved in quite some time. He looked up slowly and smiled at the bear, happy and a bit surprised to see Ben smiling down at him in return. The sun hit the bear in just a way that seemed to give his eyes an orange glow--an effect he'd never seen before. To say the least, it made Ben look even more handsome. "You...look nice,"

Ben's smile spread over his features a little bit more. The wolf--even if they had a few obstacles to go through--was definitely his type he thought. He could easily see himself nestling up to the wolf while watching a movie, or even giving him a greeting kiss on first sight.

Perhaps it was gravity, or maybe it was the fact he'd begun to think about it, but Ben found him lowering his head--his lips slowly approaching Marion. The wolf obviously knew to expect it, it was far to slow to take him by surprise. When he was close enough to feel the heat of Marion's face he stopped, staring into the wolf's eyes; searching for a sign of approval.

It came quickly enough. The wolf slowly closed his eyes and tilted his head, just enough for their lips to meet together in unison. Pulling the male closer and leaning down to close the final few hair's breadths between them, Ben let his own eyes close so he could fully enjoy what was about to happen.

Slow. Steady. Most definitely steady. There was no rush, and no concept of an end to the moment for them. The only thing he was aware of was how nice Marion felt pressed against his body. Despite the clothes that separated them he was sure he felt Marion's heart beating against his chest--his own thumping back at the wolf. A pair of arms were around his own waist, keeping him close while it seemed Marion was much more focused on the kiss than holding onto him.

Marion let out a small moan into the bear's muzzle, leaning up on his tip toes to continue their kiss for a few moments more. He felt Ben's arm move and tighten around him, bringing him closer. The first time. It was his first time kissing Ben so deeply, and he loved it. The fact that it was a supporting act, that it held just as much care and affection as it did enjoyment only made it mean that much more.

Ben pulled back slowly, only to keep the tips of their lips still touching before angling his head the opposite way and returning to Marion's muzzle. He let his tongue slip into the wolf's muzzle and press against Marion's that gently pressed and ran over his own. The difference in their size even went to their kiss; because Ben realized his tongue was nearly twice as large as the wolf's, which made all the effort to do anything he did.

Marion kept his paws on Ben's sides, feeling the warmth the bear offered and realizing it was yet another first. The first time he felt Ben. He feels so nice. Warm. Marion thought with another gentle moan, knowing he wouldn't mind more of this. Flash thoughts of being wrapped in the bear's arms on a cold night, or of simply nestling closer to Ben made his stomach flutter unsurely, but happily.

Ben pulled back and kept stroking the wolf's muzzle. He smiled down at Marion as gently as the wolf was smiling up at him, and couldn't help but think for an instant that he was in love. Even if it was too soon to know for sure he knew one thing; he'd never kissed any of his other boyfriends before the sixth date. Then again, this relationship was already on a different level of maturaity then any other. It was perhaps a bit more mature than he'd meant it to be--after all, he was still a bachelor; well, if not one seeing a particular wolf. Of course, he wasn't quite sure when the last time it was he'd kissed anyone so nicely so soon into a relationship.

Marion was the first to speak. He found himself out of the bear's arms, and the world was suddenly a much colder place--like all the warmth had faded when Ben let go. Still, he felt a warmth inside him, even if just an emotional one. Looking up and smiling gently he found that--perhaps a bit pupish--he didn't meet Ben's eyes, "Bye Ben,"

Ben smiled and fought the urge to take a step forward for yet another kiss. Instead he put his paws into his pockets and looked out at the sun, of which only the tip was now visible. He let out a small sigh and nodded, "Bye Marion...I had fun on our date,"

There wasn't a reply. Instead, the next thing Ben felt was the soft pair of lips pressed against his cheek and just as quickly as it was there it was gone.

"I did too," Marion said lowly and didn't waste anymore time before getting into his car. He noted how after he'd closed the door the bear waited just a few moments more, as if to ensure he was inside, and then began to walk off too. He waited till Ben was out of the garage and then began his own trip home, still thinking he could feel the warmth of Ben against his own body.

The trip home didn't take long, or at least it seemed that way. Marion even found himself singing along to the radio--as if he was a teenager again. He couldn't remember the last time he'd felt this way; warm, happy, fuzzy, and nervous all at the same time. It was so familiar, and he couldn't help but think that perhaps Ben was already close enough to share those type of kisses more frequently.

He was home quickly enough, and found himself almost skipping up the stairs. Marion kept smiling and couldn't help but feel like he was on top of the world. There was nothing that could be wrong. In his mind he couldn't help but think about what he and Ben would do for their fourth date. Of course, there was still Chris to consider. The pup was still a pup in his eyes, but he knew Chris deserved to know--it wasn't fair to hide his relationship or split his time between the two.

Opening the door that all changed though. Marion heard the unmistakable sob, which he quickly found the source of on the couch.