On the Rooftop
On the Rooftop (alt title: Promises)
This is an older story of mine that I made about bullying toward gays, part of a mini-series about an all-boys school called Ridgebrook High. This is the first episode of the series, where the future valedictorian can no longer take the bullying, but is stopped from jumping by a Benjamin Nickel, a classmate of his he never noticed.
In the midst of teenage years, we realize people fall into groups. And we firmly believe in the fact that these groups are all that matter, even into adulthood. I soon realized that I do not fit in to any of them because of what I am. Gay. Faggot. Freak. That's what I am to all of them. Which is why I tend to stay away from people and they from me. All I can do is watch those I would have loved to be with live their lives, make out with girls behind the school and poke fun of guys like me... Maybe that's my destiny. Just being a face in the crowd. That gay guy. Having people think, "shit, he'll molest me if we become friends."
I was putting my books into my locker one day when the door suddenly slammed shut. Where the door was, the face of the Hockey team captain. I looked at his muscles and could tell he played sports other than hockey.
"Hey, gay. Wanna carry my books?" He asked, his minty fresh breath and subtle cologne working their way up my nose and etching themselves into my mind.
"Err, uh..."
Next thing I knew, he knocked them from my grasp and as he walked away, a smug grin on his face, I heard the familiar word.
"Faggot. Fucking Faggot."
I clutched my chest and felt the tears roll down my face. You never get used to the abuse, you never do. I close my eyes and a cold resolve fills my body. I can't take it anymore, I won't. By tomorrow, it'll all be over.
*
As I stood on top of the building, I looked down. "I never thought I'd get this far. I'm not only gay; I'm also a coward. No wonder they all hate me." I tip forward, squeezing my eyes shut, preparing to jump when I hear a voice.
"NO! Jared, don't do it! Please, step down from the ledge!"
I whirl around and see a familiar face. It was Benjamin Nickel, a guitarist in the school band, worry covering his tan face.
"What do you want? If I'm gone, no one will miss me. In fact, they'll laugh!" I snap, trying to hide my watery eyes behind oversized glasses.
"No, they won't. They'll regret every second of it. And so will I."
"NO! Nothing will ever change, it never has!"
"It's just high school! You have a whole life to look forward to!"
Something awakens inside of me, something that once slept in my body, "You mean it?"
Benjamin smiled, his gray eyes crinkling at the edge.
Suddenly, I slipped. But I never fell. Benjamin grabbed my arm, pulling me back up, muscles straining as he pulled me away from the abyss. As he pulled me back, I could see my glasses hurtle toward the ground far below. Benjamin pressed me to his chest, holding me tightly as sobs rack my form.
"Why did you save me? I've always ignored you!"
Benjamin smiled softly, "You had your reasons. I looked like one of the bullies, didn't I?"
I feel him trace my features with one hand.
"But I always loved you, from your pale skin, your flaxen hair, your green eyes, even your insanely out of style nerd glasses."
At that remark, a giggle slips out. The tenseness in my body fades and soon, a smile spreads across my face too.
Benjamin noticed and took my hands. "I want you to make me a promise Jared."
I cock my head, but then nod. "Anything."
"Promise that you'll never doubt yourself enough to attempt suicide. Promise me that you'll love yourself no matter what....And promise me...That you will always love me the way I love you."
Tears fill my eyes again, this time, tears of joy and I choke out the words:
"I promise."
The angel I never saw saved me.