FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

the lights went out at our gig. the fans now going insane. me and hayden walk over to the screen and hugg eachother. he walks out and a light comes on from under my drum kit making a huge shadow on the screen. the fans scream louder.

_ There is a hell.... _

he sings into his mic and the fans know what song we are about to play. i walk out and hit the bottom toms and the lights go out dj starts the strings on his keybord as marcus and josh walk out and play the first strings of the song. shotly after the screen drops the lights come back on and we all play.

_ Crucify me, and nail my hands to a wooden cross. _ _ There is nothing above, there is nothing below. _ _ Heaven and Hell lives in all of us, _ _ And I've been cast astray. _

_ I am an ocean, I am the sea, _ _ There is a world inside of me. _ _ Lost in the abyss, drowned in the deep, _ _ No set of lungs could salvage me. _ _ Only a shipwreck, only a ghost, _ _ Merely a graveyard of your former self. _ _ We just watched the waves crash over. _ _ I've been cast astray. _

_ There is a Hell, believe me I've seen it. _ _ There is a Heaven, let's keep it a secret. _ (No one needs to know) _ There is a Hell, believe me I've seen it. _ _ There is a Heaven, let's keep it a secret. _ (No one needs to know)

_ I am an ocean, I am the sea, ** **There is a world inside of me. _

_ Lost in the abyss, drowned in the deep, _ _ No set of lungs could salvage me. _ _ Save yourself, save your breath, _ _ The tides too strong, you'll catch your death. _ _ So breathe for me, just breathe. _

the lights go out then back on reviling Lizz, Zack, Abbey, Seth, Aaron, Alex, Jamie, and Maria with mics in front of them. the music stops and spot lights shine down on everyone on stage and we sing into our mics.

_ There is a Hell, believe me I've seen it. _ _ There is a Heaven, let's keep it a secret. _ (There is a hell, believe me I've seen) _ There is a Hell, believe me I've seen it. _ _ There is a Heaven, let's keep it a secret. _ (There is a hell believe me I've seen)

the lights flash and they grabe their mics as we played Crucify Me by Bring Me The Horizon. they walk around stage and on serten parts sing with us. after the song is done they walk backstage and take their seats and watch the rest of the show.

"dam great show you guys." zack said.

"thanks!" Hayden, Alex, Dj, Marcus, Josh and i said.

"yeah that was fun singing with you guys. you guys keep up the good work. i have to go so see ya tomorrow." aaron said and walked away with seth smiling and waving. we waved back and soon the rest left as well.

"well we are all packed up lets go home." hayden said and grabed my paw i nodded and waved to the others and we walked to his car. when we got their he turnd on his ipod to No Escape by The Browning (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G6Zj3ZuKf7w please listin to during this part).

we pulled out and started driving. we pulled up to a stop light and sang along to the music that was playing. when pulled up and a car ran a red light and nearly hit us. we looked at each other and laughed knowing we could have been killed. we continue up to the college grounds. before we could turn in a care slamed into us forcing the car to accelerate fastly and we slammed into the wall. i blacked out from the crash.

when i woke up i had stiches randomly around arm from where the glass cut me. i had a huge headache and stiches on my forhead. i noticed the IV then my heart moneter started beeping fastly. a tall wolf ran in wearing scrubs and looked at me then the heart moneter.

"ok whats worng you seem normal but your heart is racing..." he said looking at me.

"Hayden Stevens... is he ok?" i asked.

"yes he is in the ICU." the wolf said looking at me wiredly.

".. can i see him.. im part of his family." i said the wolf nodded lightly then helped me up. he put my IV on a stand that could roll and helped me walk down . when i walked into the room hayden was hooked up to a IV and a blood pack. he was sleeping.

_"he is in a coma from the car crash.. he slamed his head on the side of the door pretty well.. all we can do right now his hope he will wake up. i will let you stay in here for now just come find me when you want to go back to your room." the wolf said. nodded and he walked out. i walked over to haydens body. i set my paw on his chest. he was still breathing and i sighed in relief. i leand down and kissed his lips. nothing happend. i sat down and took his paw. i knew he would make it though.. at the same time i had tears falling down my face. i knew that i may lose him. my heart slowly broke piece by piece then i just broke down crying. i laid my head on his belly and my tears soaked into his fur. soon i was told i had to go back to my room so i did. when i got back i quickly fell asleep after about a week i was told i could go back home. but i was told hayden was still in a coma. i fellt like i was about to brake down so i just ran to the car and got back in. i put my paws to my eyes and stayed like that for a while. soon i looked up at haydens room and smiled thinking he will make it. i put the car in reverse and backed out and drove to the dorm. _

month later

"im here to see Hayden Stevens." i said to the female fox. she nodded then let me go to his room. when i got in he was still in his coma but a doctor looked and with a sad exspresion on her face.

"hon sence your his family... well husband.. we need to know... should we let him die or keep him alive." when she said that my eyes went wide and my mouth hung open. "if we keep him alive we will just be putting him though more pain..." she said then looked down.

"I-I...I ha...have....ta.to thing ab.about it." i said chocking on my words. my heart finly broke down when she left. i feel to my knees and took his paw and held it to my heart.

"hayden please give me a sign.... please..." i said. i felt his paw move lightly. i looked up and i saw a dog that looked just like hayden standing on the other said of haydens body.

"hay...hayden?" i asked looking at him.

"hey hon..." he said waving to me. my eyes flew open then looked at the body then at the ghost that stood before me.

"i...i dont know what to do.. i ... i want you with me... but i dont want you in pain." i said and looked at his body as i held his paw in my paws.

"hon... you know what you should do." he said smiling.

"but hayden... i dont want you to die.. if i let you live.. you would forget most of the things you know.. you would have to be helped with everything... i want to help you... but i dont want you to be misrable... dam it hayden i dont know what to do." i said now crying on to his arm.

_"no you do know what to do." he said and put his paw on my shoulder. i felt the tuch but knew his paw wasnt really their. _

"hon... i dont want to do that." i said tears flowing rapidly down my muzzle. "i dont want you to go... i want you in my life... forever.. and ever..." i said.

_"hayden i have known you for a year... in that small time i married you... i love you and want to be with you... i want to do all i can.. but just not that." i said hayden leand down so he looked into my eyes. _

"jeremy... life thoughs you things you dont want. you have to take the best way... if i stay alive i wont remember you... i wount remember pretty much anything... i trust you know what to do." he said then walked towrds the wall and disapperd. i slammed my fist into the ground.

_"hayden come back... please hayden..." i said curling my body into my knees a small puddle of tears forming on the ground know. "hayden please dont make me do this.. please. god please." i said shaking haydens body. i stood up and walked over to haydens body then kissed his lips. the nurse walked in and looked at me. _

"so... should we let him live?" she asked. my body fell to the ground.

"n....ye........n-no..... not if he is going to have to much brain damage..." i wanted to stabe myself for saying that. i looked up and saw haydens face in the window. it moved to me then moved to my lips and kissed me.. it smiled and nodded his head.

_"you did the right thing." he said into my ear. i flicked my ears and felt tears flow down my muzzle into my paws. i hugged his body tightly taking in all of his musk. for the last time i would hug my husband and smell him. _

"the nurse unpluged the machiens and haydens chest slowly stoped preathing the doctore checked his pulse and looked up at me and nodded. i stood infront of his body. my eyes were burnning from the tears and my eyes still hade some tears but they wouldnt fall.. i zoned into haydens body and looked at every inch of his purple and black fur. i hugged him tightly one last time and kissed his lips i noticed a he had a watch on. i took it off his paw and looked at it. when i flipped it over there were words on it.

_"Hayden and Jeremy... Till The End Of Time.. love will never fail." i said and held it to my chest. and looked over haydens body and sighed. "hayden... i love you forever.. i will never forget you." i said and kissed his forhead then walked out of the room with the watch over my heart. after a few steps i stoped and put the watch on my rist and smiled at it. it was a black watch and the inside was the same color of his eyes. the numbers were silver and the clock hands was the color of his fur. i smiled and put my paw over it. _

i walked to the car and drove home. when i walked into my dorm room my heart broke down and i walked over to the closet and pulled out a gun... i sat down on the bed with one of haydens shirts. i brought it to my muzzle and sniffed it taking in the strong scent of hayden.. my eyes closed and i brought the gun to my muzzle. then shook my head and put the gun down onto the bed.

"dam it..." i said sad yet angry tone. i shook me head picked up the gun and looked at it. i loaded a bullet and brought it to my head. i looked up then closed my eyes. "hayden im coming." i said then heard a click and felt a huge force ram into me.

"JEREMY NO!" aaron yelled throwing the gun away from me.

"aaron let me die. haydens dead......" i said.

"that dosnt mean you should go kill your self!" aaron yelled holding my paws behind my head. he laid on top of my so i couldnt move.

"aaron please.. i cant go on... hayden was everything to me.. i cant live without him." i said.

"yes you can... your strong i know you can get though this..." he said. i felt a tear fall from his muzzle. he let me go and we both sat up. "is hayden really dead?" he asked

"yes.. he was in a coma for a month.. if we let him live he would not have rememberd anything and would need help with everything in his life... i had to let him go but i didnt want to." i said putting my paws to my eyes.

"do you want me to spend the night with you?" he asked rubbing my shoulder.

_"please." i said and hugged him tightly now crying loudly. he went over to the other bed and left me on the one hayden and i always slept on. soon i was sleeping and so was he. _

(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oAdQzCq53XE please watch this and read the lryics on here... please!)

_ Cry alone, I've gone away _ _ No more nights, no more pain _ _ I've gone alone, took all my strength _ _ I've made the change, _ _ I won't see you tonight _

_ Sorrow, sank deep inside my blood _ _ All the ones around me _ _ I cared for and loved _

_ It's building up inside of me _ _ A place so dark, so cold, I had to set me free _ _ Don't mourn for me, _ _ You're not the one to place the blame _ _ As bottles call my name I won't see you tonight _

_ Sorrow sank deep inside my blood _ _ All the ones around me _ _ I cared for and most of all I loved _ _ But I can't see myself that way _ _ Please don't forget me or cry while I'm away _

_ Cry alone, I've gone away _ _ No more nights, no more pain _ _ I've gone alone, took all my strength _ _ But I've made the change, _ _ I won't see you tonight _

_ So far away, I'm gone. _ _ Please don't follow me tonight _ _ And while I'm gone everything will be alright _

_ No more breath inside _ _ Essence left my heart tonight _ _ No more breath inside _ _ Essence left my heart tonight _

_ i woke up and hugged haydens pillow tightly to my chest. i looked and saw aaron still sleeping. i put on sakias jacket and haydens watch and walked out into the dark world. i sat down outside and listined to to I Wont See You Tonight (part 1) by Avenged Sevenfold.. i looked up and saw hayden walking towrds me smiling. he sat down beside me and i hugged him tightly and he hugged me back. _

"hayden.. i-I just cant do it..." i said pulling him closer into me.

_"dont worry.. everything will be alright.. trust me." he said and smiled. he looked to the right and so did i. sakia and his mate were walking up and sat by us. _

_"h..hi" i said holding hayden close to me. _

"jeremy... why did you nearly kill yourself? hayden is fine... you should be happy he dosnt have to suffer." sakia said.

"yes.. be happy... you will find another guy just like hayden." the otter smiled.

_"but i dont want another guy.. i just want hayden... only him... no one else." i said crying into haydens shoulder. _

"dont worry ... you will be fine.. trust me." hayden said kissing my lips. "also your grandma says high.. and to stop pawing off." he said and smiled. i chuckled and smiled and hugged him tightly.

"i love you.. no matter what." i said kissing his lips.

"i love you to and i will be watching over you and visting you everyday." he said and smiled. i closed my eyes and rested against haydens body.

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UZl03hHhIgA -Crucify me by b.m.t.h

More lyrics: http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/b/bring_me_the_horizon/#share