Broken Christmas
A/N: Hello all. Decided I'd do a Christmas story, and this came out of the six hours of typing and zoning out. Anyways; I might add a yiff part to this, but I like it so far. Nick Jamrock, Bradley Harrison, Veronica Blain, and any other character that is in this story is (c) of me, and any resemblance to something real is purely coincidental. Enjoy~
Oh and yes, this has NOTHING to do with magic or fantasy. Strange, isn't it?
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They say that Christmas is a time for children. A time of innocence reborn within the gifts given back and forth between families and loved ones. Perhaps that's true. But sometimes, people forget the season's true meaning. Of course, innocence plays a part of it, but so does the thought of love. Love, family, happiness, joy, peace. Sometimes, they are forgotten in all the frenzy. But, there are those times when everything drops, and everything seems just a fantasy wished to others.
This was one of those times.
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It started off as a lazy December day for Bradley Harrison. Though living within a city almost as big as New York would create havoc, he was happy to just be here in a simple apartment, sleeping late into the day. It took a lot of groveling, but he got the last two weeks of December off to have to himself-which was like every Christmas since he left his parents five years ago. Now twenty-six, the raccoon was just dreading the season.
Handsome in all appearances, his six foot build was anything a female 'coon would wish for. Dark blue fur covered him from head to toe, letting him stand out amongst the streets of Radcliff. Even his dark green hair going down to the small of his back seemed to draw eyes always towards him. But, he had just let the days pass without a look to the females. He adored the attention of the males.
One in particular was a Nick Jamrock, a fellow worker at his company. Some days at work, he would daze off and stare at the manager he worked for, just dreaming of what life would be if they were together. Mr. Jamrock was the wolf in charge of Human Resources, dealing with the many calls of distress and handing out orders to his fellow workers. Matching Bradley with his beauty, he would be the one that everyone wondered why he was still a bachelor. Even Bradley had wondered about it-and the thought of him perhaps even being gay was the top of the list of reasons.
Though, he understood life wasn't that simple, it wasn't always spectacular in the way it played out. He watched through those blue orbs as Nick courted a few females to dates, and enjoyed their presence. Those were the days that he dreaded-accidentally running into the wolf outside of the work they did. But today was different. He decided he'd just stay within the walls of his own apartment and not worry about the constant craze that happened always within these streets a week before Christmas.
Christmas. It always seemed to disappoint him year after year. Having only a few friends in the big city, he had really nothing to enjoy in the time of getting together. Even the company parties always dragged him down to the depths of despair, as he saw his one chance of happiness-at least in his eyes-get surrounded by the females of his corporation. This year, he decided if he was going to be brought down with the season's greetings, he'd have it happen within his own home.
Staring slightly at the mockery of a Christmas tree he had put up, Brad began to dream again. A family, at a time like this, a family would be nice to have. But he had remembered his own family outings during the holidays, and each memory had brought with it a sense of foreboding. His father would get drunk, the relatives would just be boisterous and loud, causing a lot of the disputes within the family walls. Holidays meant screaming to him, headaches, drunk relatives, and usually one or both of the parents driving away in a fugue of anger. Eventually, they just stopped having Christmas and any other family holiday.
So why had he bought a Christmas tree each year? Bradley still didn't understand the sentiment of getting one. Even though he wanted to love the season, he couldn't bring himself to enjoy it. Everything about it was ruined, everything seemed to just be a shallow attempt at recreating a perfect season. And yet, where had he been every Christmas Day? Wallowing sadly in front of his tree, wondering what would the New Year bring to him.
This year, he planned it wouldn't be like that. Bradley knew he was going to change that vicious cycle of depression. He was going to figure out a way to just enjoy the holiday, even if it was just by himself. Yanking himself off the couch, he yawned and stretched, letting his tail twitch around within the neatly pressed crimson pants he had gotten for himself. It was all planned out, even down to the pseudo date he'd make an attempt at. There were females all over the place that wanted him-they constantly gave him numbers. One in fact had told him to come over to her Christmas party, and enjoy the night out with her.
He may have been gay, but he still wasn't a virgin with the females. He had his little fun period in the early years of being away from his parents, and even with them their. But each time, it hadn't been satisfying to him. Yet, he didn't care-as long as he would have something to do to break away from the fugue he was in. Pulling out the card the ocelot had given him during his morning coffee run, Bradley went over to the phone and picked it up, dialing quickly to get her home number.
"Uh.. Hello... Veronica." He started out, shakily. "Yes, this is Brad. I was wondering what you were doing tomorrow?" Nodding to her answer, he smiled lightly, "Really? Would you care to go out on a date?" Again, his smile grew, "Great.. I'll come by at around four to pick you up. See you tomorrow!" He hung up the phone and placed the card on the table next to it. Perhaps this was okay, perhaps he'd forget about everything and just live a normal life without worrying about his sexuality. Yeah, that'll be great.
Tossing on a shirt, Brad left his apartment, grabbing his keys on the way out. "Might as well get her a little present, right?" He told himself that was what he was going to do, yeah. It was only a matter of moments when he found himself driving down Main Street, looking for some place, some vent for his little fugue.
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The date had never gone better, with him giving her a good night kiss at her door, before she had invited him up. They spent the night together, and he was in a great mood. Faking was easy for him, it had kept him thinking everything was alright. That night, he had found himself in her throws of passion, his own body only responding to what was happening. Nothing about it had become of him, but he was determined to make this work.
However, as he laid there, with his arms around her, he began to stare off into her apartment's walls, wondering about why he had done this. Was it truly all right? Was it as perfect as it had happened? Then thoughts of the looks he had gotten from Nick. Those were the moments that were perfect. Even those times he had gone out drinking with the guys, those simple looks he had gotten from the wolf were the things he looked forward to. Perhaps this wasn't the way it was suppose to go. Perhaps there was something else to look forward to than glances that meant nothing. And with that thought, he found himself asleep with the fox in his arms, holding her as though he was trying to keep his happiness close.
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With the day done, the wolf started towards home. Tonight he'd have some brandy and forget another hard day. Yeah, a perfect night alone, wondering about tomorrow's work. Turning his car down Carson Avenue, he had slowed down. Eyes peered through the passenger side window, peeking at an apartment complex. His thoughts drifted away, as he began to wonder about things. Shaking his head, he continued down Carson to get to Dallon Court. His house, his brandy, was waiting for him. He couldn't just let that happen.
Secretly, he had always wondered about a simple raccoon that worked for him. The fellow worker was just as graceful as him, if not more so. Nick couldn't figure out what had made him notice the raccoon. There were other fellow workers who were graceful in their work, but it just seemed that he zeroed out Bradley. Even when he had begged for these two weeks off, Nick could only speculate the reasons. Usually, Brad had worked over time each and every day, leaving just about the time he had left from the Trinity Right Company building.
With his brandy in hand, the wolf had turned on his television, wanting to just be within the safe confines of his house, where nothing mattered. Patting the table next to him, the wolf searched for something without even looking. Finally, his paw gripped around a simple box, and yanked it close to his face, packing it down. Flicking open the top, he jumped the box up and grabbed a cigarette in his muzzle, before moving towards the lighter that he had kept near him at all times. Igniting the smoke, he inhaled. Yeah, tonight nothing mattered.
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Stirring himself from his sleep, it took just a moment to realize that Veronica had gotten up before him and was in the bathroom waking herself up. It almost brightened his day to see that he wasn't holding her-then the grief of losing something, even something that wasn't even true for himself, had set in. This was what Christmas was for him, and it still seemed that it would haunt the raccoon.
Bradley quickly got himself out of bed and peered in on the cat in the bathroom. "Good morning." He said with a smile. "Sleep good?" She nodded back with her own smile before going back to washing her face. Sighing to himself, Bradley grabbed his shirt and pants and quickly got them on. "I'm going to get some coffee, you want some?"
"Sure... A cappuccino latte with milk, hun." Going back into the bathroom, he gave her a kiss on the cheek, before exiting the apartment.
"Heh.. Coffee.. Yeah right." Facepawing, the raccoon just made his way towards the coffee shop, passing by the liquor store on his way. "Some vodka would be nice about now..." He cleared his throat and entered the establishment with heavy eyes. Would tonight be the same as last night? Would he spend it with the ocelot and forget about Christmas time alone? Perhaps it would be the best for him to forget about the -
Without even thinking, he found himself running into the wolf he was trying to forget. "..." Blinking a few times, Bradley tried to hide his blush. "S-s-sorry Mr. Jamrock." Barely an utterance, he kept his eyes from staring directly into the wolf's.
"Now now... I told you outside of work you can call me Nick, Brad." Patting him on the shoulder while holding his coffee, the wolf took a sip with a smirk. "Enjoying your vacation time?"
"Y-y-yes sir."
"Good... I want you to look sharp when you come back on the New Year... Oh.. And have a Merry Christmas."
"Y-you two...N-nick." That only made his blush redden considerably. "M-m-merry Christmas..." Nodding back to him, the wolf made his way out of the shop to continue on towards work. He himself would be taking Christmas off to spend time at home, but now, it was crunch time with three days till Christmas Eve.
Bradley swallowed down nervously as he stood in front of the counter, gazing back at Nick. His eyes wouldn't leave the wolf's side, even as the wolf turned around to smile at him and leave into his car. "-ou like today, sir?" A voice broke him out of his trance as he spun around to see a smiling dragon. "Sir?"
"Oh... Um... A large black coffee and a medium Cappuccino Latte with milk please." She nodded to him with her draconic smile and went towards making his order. "...Nick..."
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On his way towards work, he hadn't meant to run into the raccoon, but it only made the day a little brighter. With the unexpected vacation time, he had found himself peering into the cubical and finding no one there. And that only made Nick's heart drop a bit. Now, though, he found himself humming a little tune when he wasn't on the phone making calls to and fro. It was sometime that day, after a meeting and before lunch, that he realized something.
He was falling for one of his workers.
And not just any of them, a male raccoon who was his subordinate.
But, he didn't care. It made sense to him now. Why he had been staring at him, and why he had been happy to see him every day. The thought of it sort of made him laugh a little. This was going to be an unusual Christmas for him, and he knew it. Now, where was Brad's number? He typed quickly upon his computer to call up his employee's records. Seeing something he didn't like, Nick just shook his head. "I'll give you a Merry Christmas..."
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Staring at Veronica, Bradley continued to wonder about her. Was she truly liking him, or was this just another female who wanted a one night stand? "AH BRAD!" She said gleefully as he walked through the front door. "I've been waiting for you to come back." Blinking at her, the raccoon blushed a bit. Veronica -was- a beautiful lady, he had to admit that. She looked stunning, even in her everyday clothes-and last night with them just enjoying a night on the town, he hadn't had a good look at her.
"V-veronica...You look beautiful." He stuttered out, before handing her coffee to her. "I got you what you wanted." She smiled and gave him a kiss on the lips, before sipping from her coffee. He did the same, while going back to thinking. 'She deserves better...' Closing his eyes, the raccoon just whimpered to himself. A lie to someone like this wasn't good, especially around a time where she might consider a grand season. "I..."
"You love me I know." A giggle came from Veronica as she spun around to work back on breakfast. "You don't need to tell me." Brad bit his lip. He couldn't look at her, not now. "I love you too..."
"..." He hadn't realized it, but he had started to hold the coffee cup tightly, hating himself for shallowly thinking this could get himself off the hook for a bad Christmas. 'Stupid me. Stupid stupid stupid... How could I think that this would be better than being alone!?' On the counter, his cell began to ring.
"Oh yeah... it's been ringing like that for a few minutes... I didn't want to answer it since it could be private." 'Manners too... damnit.' He nodded and gruffed silently before placing his coffee next to his phone and picked it up.
He immediately recognized the voice. "...N-nick?" Blinking some more, he just listened to the wolf on the other end. A blush continued to redden those cheeks. "I-I...see...I w-will." Bradley looked over at Veronica and nodded to himself. "I have someone...I..will." He took a large breathe. "Then... seven o'clock? Alright..." Closing the phone, he tried to shut the world around him out.
"Who's Nick?" She questioned while messing with the eggs in the pan.
"My boss...."
"Why'd he call?"
"He invited me.. And you to a dinner party." Ears splayed. "B-but... I don't know."
"A dinner party!? When is it?"
"Christmas Eve."
"Well then... we should go over... I mean, I don't think you want to spend Christmas Eve alone or with my family." Another giggle. "I have the perfect dress for it too!"
A whimper escaped his lips. He was destined to have the worst Christmas ever, he thought. This was all just because he decided to take the time and attempt to make something right out of a fake life.
The rest of the day just seemed to blur together as he went around the shops with the female in his arms. They peered at jewelry, clothing, even some presents they would get others. But the raccoon had that dinner party he'd most likely regret going to.
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Christmas Eve had come about quickly, with not that much happening over the days in between. Bradley had fount himself seeing Veronica each of those days, wanting to at least find some way to deviate the sadness he had. At least he was attempting-he thought-to actually like her more than just as a friend.
That night, he found himself slipping into a fully crimson attire, something he was courted into by Veronica.
"You look good in red, you should get this!" She exclaimed to him. "Yeah.. This'll be perfect." That had come about after he had explained he hadn't any 'dressy' clothes to perhaps wear to the party.
Knocking upon the house door, Brad cleared his throat. Here was the big moment, the time where he had to convince himself that the wolf was just his boss, no one to really like in a time like this. Veronica was for him; at least that was what he kept telling himself. As the wolf answered, he smiled at the two. "Well well... Looks like you made it. I'm glad." His smile grew. "And who is this lovely lady?"
"Veronica Blain, and you must be Nick Jamrock. It's a pleasure to meet you."
"No no. The pleasure is most certainly mine." He peered back inside of the house, "Well then, now that you're here, why don't we get you out of the cold and into our humble abode."
'Our... of course he'd have a girlfriend.' Bradley thought to himself. "Thank you Nick." They entered and hung their coats before meeting with a few of the other guests-most of them the raccoon knew as higher ups in the company. A Mr. Bradstock, Mrs. Gullworth, Mr. Dillon, and even the company president -the- Mr. Kit Trinity. All of them had their loved ones present, each enjoying a glass of champagne between each other.
Brad felt very insecure with all of the big names in the group, but the night seemedto go by with little to no annoyances. Simple talk of business even family life passed by between all of them, with the raccoon keeping a low profile, until Nick called him out upon it. "Hey Brad... Why are you being so quiet? Come join our conversation. I'm sure you have some stories to tell. Why even Ms. Veronica has some." Fidgeting in his chair, Brad was cornered as everyone stared at him, wondering what he might say, only to be broken out of their silence by the raccoon's plea to escape.
"Excuse me, I must go to the men's room." Hiding his blush as best he could, Brad made his way towards the bathroom, with the others just awestruck within the abruptness of it all. In the safe confines of the bathroom, Brad turned on the water to splash it against his face. "Calm down.. Calm down..." But he couldn't help but be apprehensive, not at a time like this.
However, as he thought back to Nick, he had realized that there was no girlfriend in tow, no one clinging to his arm tonight. It seemed to only be a passing thought as more water hit his face. "Are you okay?" A voice came with knocking upon the door. It was Nick coming to check u p on him.
"Yes.. I'm perfectly fine."
"Are you sure?" The doorknob began to turn slightly, with Brad freaking out a little more. "Because you've been in here for five minutes." 'Five minutes?' Entering inside of the bathroom, the wolf stared at his colleague with wondering eyes.
Almost having a spazz attack, the raccoon spun around, ready to explain himself, before slipping and falling-yanking down Nick in the process of hoping to catch himself with something. A resounding slam with their lips locking on the floor followed, with Brad's cheeks beginning to flush brightly. The wolf was just as surprised as the 'coon, though he was more composed and readily accepting of the kiss, even going as far as to not even move. Eyes closed as they enjoyed this single moment, before Nick started to get up, clearing his throat just slightly.
Staying upon the floor, Bradley looked up at the ceiling, his mind trying to recapture what had happened and make sense of it. Once it did, his body flung itself up and past Nick, rushing towards the door. The wolf grabbed his arm, only to have his hold broken. "I have to go..." Without another word, he disappeared out of the bathroom and out of the house-Veronica just staring at the open door.
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"What have I done!?" He muttered to himself as he ran. Tears came readily as sadness over took his body. Replaying over and over in his head was the kiss, the accidental kiss that he secretly wished for. But why had it torn him up so? Bradley knew it had to be because he was telling himself it wouldn't work out, it wouldn't happen within his lifetime.
Street signs blurred as he continued to run. Nothing was stopping him, not at this hour, not at this second. He wanted to get away from it all, escape to a fantasy where it never happened. Work meant nothing at this moment, that dinner party meant nothing; Veronica meant nothing. Tonight, he knew, would be a nightmare worth forgetting, worth never happening.
Turning around the corner, Bradley found himself at the park in the center of town. Douglas Valley Park, a place where he had enjoyed summer moments alone. But tonight, within this dead of winter, he found solitude in the only place he felt at home. The raccoon's apartment wouldn't do any good, no. Finding himself a bench, Brad sat down to mull over the night, tears still rushing down his cheeks. "Damnit.. Why'd I have to kiss him?" The question ran over and over through his mind, looking for any kind of answer, anything to uphold himself through this weird time.
The raccoon stared out at the decorations all around him. Twinkling lights, ornaments, even fake presents littered the grounds. Christmas time, a time of hell for the raccoon.
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Sadness took over the wolf's body as he watched Brad leave his house. He didn't mind the kiss, he thrived for it. But it seemed that it distressed the raccoon he so dearly loved at this moment. Giving a sigh of defeat, he gathered up his coat and hat, along with his smokes. Bowing apologetically to his dinner guests, he explained he'd get back the raccoon and continue with the festivities. With the door closing behind him, Nick only shook his head. "You needn't run from me, Brad." He hopped into his car and started to drive around, searching for any place that would house the raccoon.
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The neighbors shook their heads. "Mr. Harrison hasn't been home." One replied. "Merry Christmas though." Giving a curt nod to the tenants around him, Nick sighed again to himself. "Where have you gone, Brad?" With his own ears splayed, he got back into his car; he wouldn't rest until he found the raccoon and got him safely back home.
Cruising around the town, he continued his search-even going as far as to meet with the other employee's from their work, wondering if he'd gone to their houses to rest up. But to no avail, Nick was left pondering where in the world he would have gone on a night like this.
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Dazed eyes seemed to just stare off in the distance, the raccoon just keeping to himself as he saw the last of the travelers around him head off home. No one would be around, not this late at night on Christmas Eve, and for that he was grateful. Brad rested his head on his paws wondering how he would face his boss when he returned to work.
Snow began to fall lightly around him, breaking him from his fugue enough to watch it twinkle around in the lit area around him. Snow seemed to always bring up his spirits, even though he couldn't figure out why. A smile began to creep along his face as he held out a paw to catch a few flakes upon it. Though, today, he seemed to understand why snow made him happy. It was the innocence of it all, the pure innocence of the whiteness that coated the grounds. "Makes you wish it would be like this all the time, huh Brad?"
The voice spooked him as a paw landed on his shoulder. "Sometimes, all you need is a little snow upon a Christmas Eve to lighten up the mood."
"N-nick!"
"In the flesh, Brad." Inhaling from his smoke, the wolf made his way around the bench to sit next to his fellow worker. "Couldn't figure out where you went for the past two hours, checked everywhere, you know."
Bradley's blush came back full force ashe stared at the ground, fidgeting with his paws. "Uh..hehe... Sorry.. I just..."
"...needed some air. I understand completely." Another inhale. "You know, I don't think that kiss was by chance."
Swallowing nervously, Brad shook his head quickly. "N-no it was!"
"Calm down, Brad... I'm not angry. In fact... I'm glad it happened." Nick flicked the but away onto the ground and stepped on it, before chuckling. "You know, I've realized something over these past few days... And that's that I like you... A lot in fact."
Tilting his head, the raccoon tried to comprehend what his boss was saying. "Y-you do?"
"Heh, yeah. And you know, I think that you feel the same."
Slowly, Brad turned to face Nick, staring deeply within those hazel eyes. His blush stood its ground, but his smile came back.
"Now then, how about we truly kiss instead of it happening when we fall."
"I'd like that..."
Leaning over, the wolf pressed his muzzle to the raccoon's, letting their lips clash for the first true time. A humble murr escaped from both as paws wrapped around each other, wanting to not even destroy something as innocent as a kiss within the snowfall. Both sets of eyes closed, enjoying the moment as it came, with Nick tilting his muzzle to let the kiss deepen; his tongue pressing forward to taste lips he had yet to taste, while paws roam where they had yet to roam.
Bradley was in heaven, his mind swaying blissfully in the kiss that came across them both. Never in his life, had he experienced something this spectacular. And yet, he wouldn't have thought it could have happened. But it soon came to an end, as Nick pulled away-though hesitantly-to stare back into those blue eyes. "I love you Brad... I truly do."
"B-but I thought you were straight." A joking punch came to the raccoon's shoulder.
"Have you ever heard of the concept of being bi?"
"Oh yeah.. Hehe."
"One last thing, Brad." Nick grinned almost wickedly. "Merry Christmas."
Nodding back to him, Brad smiled. "Merry Christmas, Nick."
"Now then, I think it's time for us to get back. Though my guests probably have left, we still have a long wait."
As they got up, the clock in the center of the park began to chime twelve times. "Ahh... seems like it's a perfect Christmas Day... A white Christmas once again."
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So you see, not always is it that presents give happiness to others. Sometimes, it's the smallest things--like snow or even a loved one coming 'round. Even so, give yourself some time to think. What does Christmas mean to you?