FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

The Ideal Condition

Chapter 4

Angels in America

Disclaimer: First off, I promised Faora that he could review this, so back off Bob! Not that I want to wait forever, you see, but give him a chance. This story may or may not contain consensual sex between males, or maybe something else, I dunno, I haven't written it yet. All I do know is that this chapter introduces a new character, and I love him! ^_^ Anyway, this new character may or may not be based off of a character of the same name from a movie I'm currently watching on HBO. Something about angels? I dunno. Yiffstar members introduced in this chapter include: Power Toast and Faora, in that order. More to come next chapter. This was a very hard chapter to write, and most of it was sprung from a random burst of emotion. Please excuse any major grammatical errors, as I wanted to maintain the feeling of confusion and raw emotion. Thanks to all my readers, you're comments force me to get my ass in gear and write!

***

Gabe was terrified of hanging around my house after my sister caught us, but that didn't stop us for long. We'd meet at the boardwalk, in the park, at the arcade; there were dozens of places for two young furres to hang out. The problem was, we were having trouble finding places to have sex. And I quickly realized that sex was the only thing that we ever did together. Sure the sex was great, but I couldn't recall having fun with Gabe doing anything else.

"What do you mean see other people?" Gabe was sitting across from me, in the diner down the road from my house. I was nursing a strawberry milkshake, and he was glaring at me, obviously hurt.

"I just think that until we can find some common ground together, we shouldn't stay exclusive." I explained, trying to make him see my view.

"We fuck almost every night, and you're telling me we have nothing in common?" People around us started to stare, making the situation even more uncomfortable. Gabe was oblivious to them, blinded by emotion. "Eso, I love you. I thought you felt the same."

"I do, I love you Gabe, but I?"

"What? You just want to be able to fuck anyone else you see. That's it isn't it?"

"No! Gabe, I?"

"I've had enough of this, Eso. This may have been a fling for you, but I was in love. I fucking love you! Doesn't that mean anything to you?" Gabe jumped out of his chair and stormed out of the diner before I could react. How could this have gone so wrong? I approached Gabe with the intention of improving our relationship, not destroying it. Even now, as I look back and write this, I don't know what else I could have done. That doesn't stop me from replaying it in my mind, over and over. No one can know for sure what other events may have fed into Gabe's final decision, but I will always feel responsible.

That night, over a decade ago, Gabe Darsey, my first love, went home from the diner, and locked himself in the bathroom. He filled the tub with warm water, and slid into it. He slit his wrists with a broken razor blade, and bled to death.

***

As soon as I heard, I knew that I couldn't keep my secret any longer. I went upstairs and sat on my mother's bed, silently, until she got home from work. Someone must have called her, because she came straight up to me and hugged me.

"I'm so sorry, Eso. I know how horrible you must feel."

"It was my fault, Mom."

"No, don't think that. It couldn't..."

"No, Mom, it was my fault. Gabe was my lover."

My mother stared at me, confused, trying to understand what I had said.

"I am a bisexual. Gabe and I were lovers, and last night, we had a fight." I felt sobs forming in my throat. "We...I told him that we...we needed to..." I broke down crying into my mother's shoulder, sobbing and hiccupping. She sat still, rubbing my arm with one paw. I cried most of that night, and the next. Gabe's funeral was the following evening, but I could bring myself to go. That is my biggest regret.

Weeks passed, then months. Slowly, my peers learned of my sexuality, and they sought to make me miserable for the remainder of high school. Years of therapy have helped me get over all of that, and I'd rather not go back to it. Every now and then, I would hook up with someone for a good time, but it was never long-lasting. I still remember the girl I took to my senior prom. It was mostly to prove to my few remaining friends that I could please both sexes, but we had a good time.

She was a beautiful, tall hamster. She was very slender; more so than I usually like, but she had perfect curves. Her breasts were just short of a handful, just the right size for me. Her ass though, she had the most perfect ass I have seen on a femme. It felt good to be seen kissing her neck during the dance. I felt everyone's eyes accusing the 'fag' with the hot date. Afterwards, I offered to take her to dinner, but we didn't get out of the parking lot. By the time my door was closed, she was ripping off her dress, and I was struggling to pull my belt out of my pants. We greedily kissed, and I ravaged her mouth with my tongue. I finally freed my pants, and pulled them open and down to my ankles with one hand, all while groping her tits with the other.

I pulled back for a moment, and we both glanced at the belt. Smirking, I picked it up from the floor of the car, and strung it into a loop. Sharon held her hands up toward the safety handle on the ceiling of the car, and I strapped her hands to it. I reached quickly up her dress, and felt around for her panties. The cotton was already wet, and I paused long enough to finger her clit through the fabric. Sharon let out a short gasp, and I pulled the panties down her legs. I bent over and licked her left leg's length, my tongue following just behind her underwear. I pulled the moist panties off of her feet and used them to tie her ankles together. Sharon was now at my mercy.

I crawled on top of her, my cock throbbing against her stomach. I bit into the top of the dress, using my teeth to tear the fabric open. She had no need to wear a bra, so her luscious tits were exposed to me. I gently caressed her breast, rubbing her nipple with my thumb. When both of her nipples were fully erect, I sucked softly on each, before giving them a hard nip. Sharon was panting, and grinding against me, trying to massage her wet pussy. I slid one paw down her stomach, and under to her waiting heat. I spread her pussy lips open, while massaging her clit with my free finger. Meanwhile, I was nipping her neck and rubbing her nipples. Sharon's juices were flowing pretty heavily into my palm, and unable to resist temptation, I released her vagina and sucked all of her fluid from my paw.

"Fuck me, Eso. Please fuck me." Sharon began thrusting her hips upward again, making my cock rub against her thighs. "I need your cock inside me. I need to cum, Eso. Fuck me, fuck me!" I too needed release, so I spread her thighs apart and positioned the head of my cock at her pussy. I tensed it a few times, rubbing the head against her cunt.

"Tell me what you want me to do to you." I looked right in her eyes, dark blue, and she looked back into mine.

"I want you to fuck me until I cOoooooh!" I shoved my cock into her on the last word, taking in a sharp breath. Her pussy was tighter than I would have thought, and she squeezed my cock with it. I slowly pulled back, before drilling into her again. Every time I sank my length into her, she let out a loud moan. I pulled back and thrust into her again, so hard that I felt my balls slap against her. I began to go faster, and she began thrusting upwards to receive me. I felt her juice running down my thigh, and began to piston faster, driving my cock deeper into her pussy. I felt her tighten against me, and sensing her climax coming, I pulled out entirely.

Sharon was just beginning to say 'Don't stop,' when I shoved my cock into her tailhole. The words changed into a scream, and I began pounding into her ass, her cunt still dripping fresh lubricant onto my shaft. I kept fucking her until I felt my orgasm coming, and I pulled out and started to paw off to finish, spraying my cum onto her light brown fur. I shifted onto my knees, my crotch even with her face, bending over awkwardly due to the low ceiling of the car. I forced my cock into her mouth, and instructed her to clean it.

She began to tentatively lick at my cock, before sucking harder on it. When I felt my erection returning, I pulled out of her mouth and settled back to the previous position. I spread her thighs again and shoved my cock into her. My length went deeper into her, and she yelled with pleasure as I struck her cervix. I pulled back as far as I could and slammed into her, as we both came together.

That night was the high point of my high school life after I lost Gabe, but college was still ahead.

***

Move in day. I still remember it, almost as if it were a dream. I sat in the passenger seat of my Mother's Mitsubishi Outlander as it pulled into the parking lot outside of my new dorm. The heap of my stuff in the back shifted lightly as the SUV fell into park. I threw open the door and stepped out into the sunlight, glad to get out of the car. I stretched a bit as a large group of furs in orange T-shirts approached me. A large black panther strode confidently up to me and held out an enormous paw. I weakly grabbed it and shook his hand.

"I'm Derrick, president of this hall." He beamed a smile, and introduced me to the rest of the group, none of which I remember now. Apparently, they were part of the welcoming committee, there to help get freshmen adjusted to dorm life. Derrick told me that if I had any major problems, I could talk to him or my RA, and then jogged off toward another freshman, a timid-looking hamster. I wondered briefly what an RA was, until I noticed my mother struggling to get my TV out of the back of the car. I rushed over to help her set it on the ground, catching the annoyed look she gave me.

"Stay right there, I'll go grab you a moving cart!" Chimed a very cheery fox, who was gone before I could look up. I helped my mother pull the last of the boxes out of the back, and took a seat on my box-refrigerator. Several minutes later, the vixen was back with the cart, and I loaded my stuff onto in while my mother discussed security and safety with the cheery fox, who was obviously trying to go help others.

I pushed the cart up the sidewalk, toward the building. Rodgers Quad, where I'd be spending the next 6 months of my life. The quad was large and boring, and appeared to be very, very old. I found out later that it was, in fact, very, very old. There was a small wooden ramp constructed over the front stairs, so I pushed the cart up and into the lobby. After signing in, I wandered through the hall looking for my room. After a few minutes I found it, thankfully located on the first floor. The room was larger than I had expected, but not in the best shape. The carpeting was a faded bluish-gray, which was very worn and torn in some places. The walls had at least 6 or 7 coats of white paint on them, and the most recent layer was peeling off near the ceiling. Several exposed pipes and heating ducts ran across the ceiling.

"Fantastic," I muttered, "Better than home." The room came furnished with a bunk bed, two desks, two dressers, and two chairs. I pulled one of these over toward myself, and slumped into it, disheartened. On the campus tour, they had shown us the smaller but newer rooms in the other halls. I was very frustrated for getting stuck in this crap-hole.

My mom walked into the room, flipping through several sheets of paperwork. She glanced at me from over the packet, before focusing her attention back to it.

"You shouldn't look so depressed yet, classes haven't even started." She threw the papers onto one of the desks and fell into the open chair. "I'm gonna miss you, kiddo."

"I know." I ran a hand through my headfur, and stretched back in the chair.

I've never been great at first impressions, and this time wasn't any different. As I leaned back, the chair lost balance, and tipped over backward. I spilled onto the floor, head against the wall. My legs flew over my head, and this was the position I was in when my roommate walked in. He was a very tall goat, wearing a black trench coat with a hooded sweatshirt under it. He had the hood pulled up, obscuring most of his face, but at my angle, I could see him fairly clearly. He looked down at me, confused, and then he smiled.

"I'm Pryer," he said, and held out a hand. After a pause, he shook my tail, and then bent down to help me up. Throughout the entire scenario, my mother was rocking back and forth in her seat, laughing hysterically. I mentally noted to claim her chair, and let Pryer deal with the traitorous one. I dusted myself off a bit, and shook Pryer's hand formally.

"I'm Eso Carter. I guess we're roommates?"

"Yeah. You're a freshman aren't you?"

"How'd you know?"

Pryer nodded his head toward my cart. "Next year you'll know to bring less stuff." Looking around the room, I realized that I had probably over-packed. It wouldn't really be my style to do something correctly anyway. I looked around for Pryer's belongings, and noticed two small boxes on the lower bunk, and a small pile of clothes, mostly hoodies.

"I'm on my way to lunch, you want to come?"

"No, thank you. I'm going to unpack first."

"Suit yourself. See you later, Eso." Pryer headed out of the door, casually waving as he left. My mom helped me unpack, and after several drawn-out minutes of her crying softly, she headed for home. I went back into my room and hooked up my new computer. My first concern with being here was meeting new people to hang out with, so I decided to walk around campus a bit. It didn't take me long to get hopelessly lost.

I hadn't realized how large the campus was, and the fact that the sun was setting didn't help. I was aimlessly heading through streets and back alleys, when I heard someone shouting. I stopped and listened closer. It was definitely shouting, but there was more. I heard loud footsteps, someone running, also laughter. As the sound came closer, I began to make out words.

"Help! Someone help me!" The voice was small, and the words came between harsh breaths. I tried to find the source of the sound, and pinpointed it to be on the other side of the building I was behind. I raced around the building, coming around the corner just in time to run straight into a blur of brown fur. I was spun around, and grabbed the wall to steady myself. My head was still spinning, but I managed to take in the scene. I had run into the timid hamster from that afternoon. He was being chased by several furs wearing filthy, ragged clothing. I noticed that they were all carrying cheap pocketknives, and the scent of evil was heavy on them.

I made a snap judgment of the situation and took off after the group. I didn't know what I could do to help, but I sure as hell wasn't going to let those thugs do whatever it was they were planning. I quickly caught up with the first, a gangly tiger that looked like he hadn't eaten in weeks. I had the advantage of surprise, so I simply kicked his shin as I ran past. He fell to the ground in a heap, but the other two didn't notice. They were a lot faster, and I chased them through several alleys, losing all track of my location. Up ahead, the hamster had run his last step, and panting, fallen to the ground. By the time I caught up, the first thug was on him. I leapt and tackled the second, catching him around the thighs. The leopard hit the ground, hard, and his switchblade skittered across the pavement.

The first thug noticed me now, and glared at me, while holding the hamster's shirt collar. He was a very intimidating badger, with a large scar across his face.

"The fuck are you looking at?" He snarled at me. "Get the fuck out of here before I kick your ass."

"Let him go." I said, feeling very small and un-intimidating. The badger stood up and walked over to me, still lying on the unconscious leopard. The badger flicked open his switchblade, and darted toward me. I raised an arm to try to block him, knowing that it was a futile effort. I could smell the badger's breath, hear him growling, and suddenly, there was a loud thud, and he was gone. I lowered my arm and looked up, slowly. I saw a shadowy, hooded figure on top of the badger, who was now backed against the wall. It was Pryer. He was standing over the thug, pummeling him viciously. There was a sickening 'thwock' every time one of Pryer's fists connected with the badger's face. I crawled over to the downed hamster.

"Are you all right?"

"I...think so. What happened?"

"My friend is taking care of your problem." I indicated the brawl behind me. "What was going on?"

"I was trying to find my way back to my dorm, when I got lost. These guys started following me, and then they tried to take my wallet, so I ran." After Pryer was sure the badger wouldn't be coming after us, he escorted us to a small tattoo parlor that was on the other side of the wall we were running by. Both the hamster and I had somehow wandered far off campus in our daze, and were now in the city itself. I suppose I should have realized that the campus wouldn't be designed like a city block. We made formal introductions; the hamster's name was Ian. He was a freshman that lived in my dorm as well. He was wearing jeans and a loose-fitting polo-shirt. Pryer explained that he worked in the tattoo parlor, and was on his way home when he heard the commotion. While he normally would have avoided the situation, he recognized my ass from earlier, and came over to help.

"You recognized my ass?" I inquired, looking at Pryer over my shoulder.

"What can I say, roomie, you've got a cute butt." I felt Pryer's eyes on me, but I didn't mind. "You won't be too weirded out having a gay roommate will you?"

"I don't think it'll be a problem," I said, smiling at him. Pryer leaned back in his chair, and put his feet up on the desk. He pulled a cigarette out of his coat pocket and stuck it in his mouth.

"Either of you boys smoke?" Ian and I both shook our heads. Pryer rolled his eyes and began searching through the drawers of the desk, apparently for a lighter. Failing to find one, he returned the cigarette and pulled his hood off. He had numerous piercings which I hadn't noticed before. Most were in his ears, but his eyebrow and nose were pierced as well. I stared at his ears a long time, and then broke the silence of the room.

"You do piercings, right?"

"Yeah. You interested?"

I nodded.

"Normally, I charge for this, but since you're a friend, follow me." Ian and I followed Pryer into a dimly lit room, where I got three hoops put into my left ear. I yelled a lot, Pryer called me a pussy, and Ian almost passed out. That was how the three of us met. We supported each other a lot through the next few years of college, but you'll read about that later.

***

Several weeks went by before I met anyone outside of those two. One day, I was sitting around in my room, wearing nothing but a bathrobe, just relaxing after classes. I had found a forum online, called Yiffstar. It was mostly full of angsty teens with over-inflated egos, but there were some good furs on there. I was reading up on the latest events when the website spontaneously crashed. I was getting ready to reboot my system, when I heard a knock on my door. I closed the robe to the best of my ability, and opened the door.

Standing in front of me was a tall blue dragon. He was wearing black pants and a black wife beater. He extended his hand, which I shook unconsciously.

"I'm Faora Meridian, you're RA."

"Oh, I've been meaning to ask someone, what exactly is an RA?"

"Damn, you freshmen, worse every year. It stands for Resident Advisor; I basically act as the head of this floor. Derrick, as the hall director, is in charge of the whole dorm. Got it now?" I nodded. "Good. I'm just stopping by to see how things are going; making sure you guys aren't hording drugs in here." I smiled awkwardly, not sure if he was joking. Faora stood there for a while, and turned to leave. "Let me know if you need anything." He wandered off down the hall.

I spent the next twenty minutes trying to convince my computer to get back online, but I would quickly discover that this school's internet connection was unstable at best. I eventually gave up, and headed out for a walk. It had gotten cold early this year, so I was dressed for the weather. I had on a pair of black slacks with a yellow T-shirt on, as well as my leather jacket. As I walked through the hall, I passed a beautiful snow-white tigress, who was running out the doors crying. I continued on my own path, not having any particular goal in mind.

I was no sooner out of the building then I felt a heavy arm fall around my shoulders.

"Hey Eso, wanna make a quick thirty bucks?"

"What is it this time, Pryer?"

"Donating plasma. Don't give me that look; it won't be any worse than getting those done." He fingered my piercings, but they were still sore. I yelped, making Pryer start laughing again. "You're such a pussy, Eso. Now come on. I know you need the money."

I reluctantly followed him, listening silently as he ranted about his day at work, his classes, and anything else that came up. It seemed like a lengthy walk, but the donation center was right outside of campus. Pryer stood with his hands on his hips, as if he had just lead us through a dense forest. He was wearing his trademark trench coat and hooded sweatshirt, and the appearance was too much. I chuckled softly.

"What's so funny, asshat?"

"Why do they call it a donation if we get paid for it?"

"Don't question the logistics, man, its easy money." Pryer shoved the doors open, and I followed his stride into the building.

Despite Pryer's assurances, it hurt a lot. Even he winced a few times. I didn't think it was really worth the thirty bucks, but now that we had money, a good time was guaranteed. We stopped by the dorm to grab Ian, and headed into town. We spent several hours in a local goth club, called 'Uptown/Downtown.' Ian and I both failed to meet anyone new, but Pryer spent most of the night flirting with a skinny wolf. He looked sleazy to me, but I noticed that Pryer tended to hang around that type of guy a lot. Nothing developed out of it for him, so the three of us headed back to my room, disheartened.

"He could have said he was straight, you know." Pryer muttered as he fell onto his bed. We sat around the room, not speaking much, and accomplishing less.

"Fuck this," Pryer spouted, "Anyone up for dinner at Denny's?" Ian nodded and stood up.

"I think I'll hang around here tonight, guys. I'm kind of tired," I muttered. "I'll join you guys next time."

"Suit yourself, Eso." Pryer gave me a small concerned glance, and headed out with Ian.

I climbed onto my bed, and stared at the ceiling. Tonight was the night that Gabe died. For some reason, I had forgotten until now. I lay there, and remembered him. I tried to stop it, I wanted to forget him, but I couldn't. I remembered how he used to touch me, I remembered the way he tasted. I slid my hand up onto my penis. I remembered penetrating him, being penetrated. I thought of his laughter. I thought of the way he said "I love you." I began stroking my hardening organ, as tears fell onto my pillow. I began to sob, all the while pawing off furiously. I remembered Gabe's face, grabbed my balls with my free hand, remembered the way he moaned when we made love. I stroked faster, the fur around my eyes clung together from the tears, remembered how his lip would tremble when I fingered his tailhole, I came, I remembered Gabe looking into my eyes, remembered his touch, his hands all over me, I screamed, sobbing, tears, sweat.

"I loved you Gabe! Why did you die? Why the fuck did you die?"

I curled up, and slept.

***

When I woke up a few hours later, Pryer was still gone, so I climbed out of bed and headed to the bathroom to shower. He was there when I got back, but he was already in bed. I assumed he was asleep, so I climbed back into my bed to attempt the same.

"Eso? Who was he?"

"...The only fur I ever loved. Good night, Pryer."

"Good night."