Why Pinkie Pie Smiles
Everyone knows Pinkie Pie and her love of smiles. But why is she so eager to smile? Why is a smile her most valued possession?
For a person to truly value a smile, there has to be an event, a catalyst that makes them value happiness above all else.
For Pinkie Pie, that event was Sunshine; the sick Pegasus.
Pinkie Pie splayed her ears backwards as she walked in careful step besides her Father down the white-washed hospital corridors. It wasn't even a few months after she got her cutie mark
Nurses passed them every now and again, stethoscopes around their necks, entering and leaving the rooms of sick ponies. There were all kinds of ponies in the rooms; Unicorns, Earth Ponies, Pegasi, young, old, male, female. It was an ordered chaos ranging from mere injuries and sprains, to full-blown sickness or disease.
The constant droning of heart monitors grew and faded out over and over again as they passed by open doorways.
"Father, how far is it to mothers room?" Pinkie asked in a hushed voice.
"It is not far now, Pinkie," her father said, his tone likewise hushed. The natural aura of the Ponyville Hospital begged quietness, and the grim faces of the doctors and nurses squeezed whatever happiness there was from the building.
Nodding silently, Pinkie continued along in her fathers footsteps, past the rooms of sick ponies and the like. Her sisters were still back at home, being babysitted by an Earth Pony from a neighboring rock farm, while Pinkie and her father visited her sick mother. She had managed to hurt herself pretty badly while moving rocks around the farm; and the doctors thought she might have broken her foreleg, so she was stuck at the hospital for a week while she recovered.
After several more hallways, they reached an open doorway, which her father stepped through, moving over to the bed where her mother lay, foreleg up in a cast, suspended from a wire from the ceiling for support and to keep her from moving it too much.
She moved to stand at the end of the bed, lifting her forelegs up onto it and peering at her mother as her father gingerly hugged her and nuzzled into her neck. "Well, what did the doctors say?" he queried.
Pinkie's mother launched into an explanation that went straight over the young ponies head, and she shook her head for a moment before moving over to the window. They were on the second floor of the hospital, and thus had a relatively good view of the hospital grounds, the sweeping gardens and the benches laid out for patients to sit on.
Off in the distance, a single young blue pegasus was laying on his stomach under an apple tree, watching the horizon. He looked to be about Pinkie's own age; young enough so far that he didn't even have a cutie mark yet.
"Mother, may I go play in the garden?" Pinkie asked hopefully, turning to her parents.
"Yes dear, go have fun," her mother said, before returning her attention to her father.
Pinkie beamed, bouncing out of the room and then towards the stairs, ambling down them to the ground floor, and then out the front door and into the garden.
She amused herself at first, by chasing butterflies, but eventually, her curiosity was tugged back towards the lone Pegasus, and so she made her way over towards him, bouncing and smiling.
"Hiya!" she proclaimed, planting her rear in the grass nearby and waving a hoof at him. "Whatcha lookin at?"
The pegasus blinked a little bit as he turned to regard her, a brow raising. His expression was...well, she didn't know how to describe it. He didn't look angry, or sad, or annoyed. But he wasn't happy, either. His expression seemed to be perpetually set in a kind of ambivalent expression. He almost looked drained, like her mother and father did after a very long day of work.
"I'm looking at the sky," the pegasus said after a few moments of deliberation, before laying his head on his forehooves and staring back at the sky once more.
Pinkie followed the line of his eyes, and tried to discern what was so interesting about the patch of sky he was staring at; finding nothing of interest there at all. "I'm Pinkie!" she said with a smile and a nod, extending a hoof towards him.
The pegasus paused once more, eyes sliding over to regard her with a curious look, before he extended his own hoof tentatively to shake hers. "I'm Sunshine," he said with a slight nod. "It's...nice to meet you, Pinkie," he said, his gaze falling back on the sky. he paused at the word 'nice', as though trying to summon up the courage to say the word.
Finding herself slightly confused, Pinkie laid herself down on her stomach as well, an ear perking at him. "Why are you staring at the sky?" she queried.
"I'm imagining that I can see cloudsdale from here," he answered, shaking his head for a moment and giving a faint sigh.
"Cloudsdale is too far away, silly," Pinkie giggled at the pegasus.
Sunshine cringed slightly at her words, and it took her a few moments to realise that she might have said something wrong.
"But I bet it's a wonderful place!" she added with an earnest nod.
"I don't remember it," Sunshine said bitterly, shaking his head for a moment and then laying it back on his forehooves.
"It's been a long time since you were there?" Pinkie asked sympathetically.
"A year...I think," he said with a sad sigh.
"But...why so long?" she asked curiously.
"I've been really, really sick," he said with a slight nod.
"For a year?!" Pinkie asked, aghast.
He nodded in response, and then shook his head at her slightly. "Don't worry though. I'm getting better. The Doctors say I'll be gone in a few days."
Pinkie smiled at that, ears pricking upwards. "That's good, then! You'll be able to see your family at Cloudsdale!" she said with a warm smile.
The pegasus nodded, closing his eyes. "Yes. I'll be able to see them all," he said, a strange note to his voice.
"So what do you do for fun, Sunshine?" she inquired.
"...Fun?" he asked, an eye blinking open to peer at her. "I'm afraid I don't get to have much fun," he said matter-of-factly.
"Of come on, you must do something for fun!" she squeaked, shaking her head vociferously. "Board games? Dress up in silly clothes? Chase balloons? Play with the animals?" she ticked off a number of activities that she had found fun in the past.
Sunshine shook his head at each of her suggestions, sighing and laying his chin on his forehooves as he watched her.
"But...but...aren't you terribly bored?!" she demanded of him.
A soft sound left the pegasus. "Sometimes. I just imagine flying most of the time," he admitted.
"But...why?" she asked, peeking at his wings for a moment. "You have wings, why not just fly?" she asked.
"The doctors say I'm not strong enough...and the last time I tried, I hurt myself pretty bad," he admitted with a sad shake of his head.
"That's no fun at all." she said with a wrinkled nose. "But you're getting better, right?!" she reassured with a smile. "You said it yourself, if you're getting sent back to your family, you'll be able to fly soon too, right?"
Sunshine seemed to ponder on that for a few moments, before giving a nod. "I'm sure of it. I'll be able to fly with my mother, and my father," A strange, wistful expression crossed his features, and Pinkie took note of it.
"It's been a really long time you could fly, hasn't it?" she asked sympathetically. "I've never flown myself, but I bet it's a super-duper experience."
The pegasus nodded once in response. "It's one of the best things there is," he said, his wings giving a slight quiver, as though aching to lift him into the sky.
Pinkie fell silent a moment at that, and then heard her name, lifting her head to see her Father standing at the front door of the hospital, calling for her to come so they could return home. "Well, it was nice meeting you, Sunshine," she said with a smile and a nod. "I might see you next time I'm here!"
"Byebye, Pinkie," he said, lifting a hoof in careless farewell, his eyes already on the horizon once more.
It was two entire days before Pinkie and her father returned to the hospital, and this time, Pinkie had come prepared. She had a deck of cards, a game of Ponopoly; the real estate game, and a colourful red balloon she had hand-picked and drawn smiley faces all over.
As her Father moved off to go and see her Mother, she peeled off into the gardens, bounding over a flower bed and bouncing over Sunshine, whom was in the same spot under the tree, head still on his hooves. He might not have even left during the night, from how still he was.
She bounced right on over to him, beaming, holding the balloon string in her mouth, plopping herself down next to the Pegasus.
"Hi Sunshine!" she said, smiling and offering him the balloon.
"Uhm, hi Pinkie," he said, raising a brow at all the balloons. "What's that for?" he asked tentatively. He sounded tired, Pinkie noticed, like he'd had a late night.
"It's for you!" she said with a grin, pushing her nose towards him to make him accept it.
The pegasus blinked, his ears perking, looking bewildered, taking the balloon string in his mouth, and the neatly tying it around a hoof so he wouldn't lose it, tilting his head at her. "Uhm...thanks," he said, quietly, not quite sure what to say.
"And I bought cards and a board game!" she said with a grin, holding up the deck of cards she had bought.
In the end, Pinkie Pie ended up staying with Sunshine for most of the afternoon, playing cards and ponopoly with him; but there was always something wrong. Something amiss.
He never smiled. Not once.
He managed to beat her with a Full Barn in Poker, with three Alicorns and a pair of a Unicorns, and he didn't even twitch the corners of his mouth when he triumphantly laid down his cards. It was like all the happiness was just sucked out of him. He was a very gloomy pegasus for one who would be returning to Cloudsdale soon, and especially with a name like Sunshine!
She was determined to make him smile...she watched him carefully during Ponopoly; made jokes, made faces, even deliberately let him win; but still, no smile. Nothing. And then it was time for her to go again.
Pinkie gave a sad little shake of her head and pushed the deck of cards towards him with her nose. "You can have those, Sunshine. You need them more than I do." she said with a nod, and then wrapped her hooves around him in a hug, giving his cheek an innocent kiss. "You're the first friend I've ever had, Sunshine," she said with a smile.
The pegasus looked at her for a long moment, blinking once, and opened his mouth to say something, before he was cut off by Pinkies father calling her name again.
Pinkie collected up her game of Ponopoly, and then bounced over to her father to return home again, waving a hoof back at the pegasus.
Sunshine peered down at the deck of cards she had left him, and then up at the balloon with the smiley faces all over it, before laying his head back on his hooves to watch the horizon.
Another two days passed, and it was time for Pinkie and her father to return to the hospital for another visit to her mother, who was supposedly getting out of the hospital after they ran just a few more tests.
And this time, she was armed for a smile war. Streamers, party poppers, and a hoof-baked cake her sisters had helped her make and decorate, with a big sun in the centre, wearing a pair of dark sunglasses and a large smile, with radiant beams of light coming off it, touching the edges of the cake. It was frosted, decorated, and perfectly cooked. If that didn't put a smile on Sunshine's face, then nothing would!
Sunshine, however, was not in his usual spot under the apple tree. It took a fair amount of asking around, but eventually, she found his room, in the kids ward. The sharp smell of antiseptic made her feel uneasy, and the hushed voices interspersed with the steady beep of monitoring machines was such a change from the sounds of wind in the leaves or a bird tweeting.
The pegasus was lying in bed, on his side, looking as sickly as ever, with an intravenous drip in one foreleg, and a machine hooked up to him, beeping in time with his heartbeat.
He was facing away, so Pinkie took the obvious opportunity to surprise him, sneaking up to the side of the bed and then planting both hooves on the edge of it, going 'Boo!'
The pegasus recoiled rolling over and flailing at the pink pony for a moment before he realised what had happened, rolling his eyes for a moment and booping her on the nose with a hoof very gently. "Hi, Pinkie." he said warmly.
"Hi Sunshine!" she grinned. "I bought you a present!" she declared, holding aloft the cake.
The pegasus blinked and peered at the pink box for a moment. "It isn't....dolls is it?" he asked warily.
"No, silly!" Pinkie giggled, shaking her head. "Open it and see!" she exclaimed, putting the box up on the bed for him.
Sunshine peered down at the box cautiously, and then opened it up, blinking down at the large, brightly-decorated cake, with the smiling sun on it.
Pinkie was disheartened when she didn't see a smile.
"Why don't you smile? Don't you like it?" she asked quietly.
"Wha?" the pegasus asked.
"You don't smile," Pinkie said, sounding defeated. "I've never seen you smile, ever," she pointed out, and then raised a hoof at him. "You have to smile for me before you can eat the cake," she stated.
Sunshine stared at her for a long moment, looking down at the cake, and then back up at her. "Why do you want to see me smile?" he asked, bewildered.
"Because you're my first friend!" she said with an earnest nod. "I never meet anyone really, on the rock farm. There are no ponies my age there except my sisters, and they're...well, family!" she said with another nod. "And you're my first friend who isn't family! So if I don't make you smile, I've failed." She leaned right in close until her nose bumped against his own. "Are you going to let me fail, Sunshine?" she accused.
The pegasus stared at her for another few moments, blinking once or twice, before shaking his head. "I don't want you to fail...But I don't have a whole lot to smile for," he admitted.
"You have heaps to smile about!" she declared.
"I...really don't," the pegasus said with a sad shake of his head, his tone hesitant.
"But you're getting better!" she said with a happy nod and a smile. "And you'll get to go back to your family in Cloudsdale!" she pointed out, grinning.
"I...guess you're right," he said after a few moments; but a smile was still not forthcoming.
"And you have the most important thing of all," she said with a firm nod, leaning in close.
"...And what is that?" he asked uncertainly.
"Cake!" Pinkie declared, scooping up some frosting and then splaying a long line of pink icing across his cheek with a happy giggle before he could get away.
The pegasus made a face, trying to push her away, only succeeding in rubbing a hoof against her very weakly. He was very gentle, and careful not to hurt her, Pinkie noticed. But that didn't stop her from taking advantage of the situation, scooping up more frosting to add to his face and chest, smearing it across him with a happy smile, giggling all the while.
Sunshine hoofed at her for a moment, before scooping some of the icing from his chest and was about to plunge it into her frizzy mane, before deciding better of it and instead scraping it across her neck in a messy stream.
It wasn't long before the two ponies were covered in pink icing, and the cake was a mess.
Pinkie grinned at Sunshine.
Sunshine smiled back.
All was right with the world.
Pinkies mother was due to be out of the hospital that day, and Pinkie insisted on going there one last time so she could say goodbye to Sunshine before he went back to Cloudsdale.
Once more, he wasn't outside under the apple tree, and so she bounced on down to his room happily, holding her Ponopoly set so she could have one last game with her first ever friend.
She hadn't even reached his doorway when she realised that something was wrong. The air felt different...somehow, she knew something was off. Off in a bad way.
Tentatively, she peeked around the doorway, and saw Sunshine with a mask on his face, a rattling sound reverberating through it, apparently feeding him oxygen. The machines around him were beeping intermittently, and a nurse was sitting besides his bed, crying silently.
Pinkie blinked at this odd sight, watching for a moment, before Sunshine caught sight of her. She lifted a hoof to wave; but instead of greeting her, his eyes widened, and he waved a hoof frantically at the nurse, rasping something to her through the mask and then pointing at Pinkie, before coughing heavily.
The nurse nodded gently and slipped around to the door, stepping out of it and closing it gently behind her, turning towards the young pink pony. "I'm sorry honey, but you can't visit him now." the nurse said, sniffling just softly.
"What...but I'm his friend!" Pinkie said, stamping a hoof. "And Momma is leaving here today, so it's my last chance to say goodbye!" she said, huffing.
A look of broken sympathy found a place on the nurses face as she leaned down to be on Pinkie's level, shaking her head. "I'm sorry honey...I'll say goodbye to him for you, okay?" she offered.
"No!" Pinkie rebuked, pushing past the nurse and then kicking the door open to Sunshine's room, bounding in and up to the bed, circling around it to put it between her and the mean nurse, scowling. "She said I couldn't see you!" she told Sunshine in a scandalised tone.
The pegasus opened his eyes and stared up at her for a moment, pushing at her with a hoof very weakly, as though to push her away.
Pinkie gave him a hurt look, her ears splaying backwards. "You don't want to be my friend any more?" she asked, her eyes starting to water.
A wracking coughing fit took the pegasus, and he shook his head vociferously in between hard coughs, wheezing for a moment. The inside of his mask was flecked with red.
He lifted a hoof to remove his mask, and the nurse moved over to stop him, looking distraught. "Sunshine, you need the mask," she protested.
The pegasus shook his head again, taking several long breaths, and then turning to Pinkie, giving her a weak smile. "Don't cry, Pinkie," he rasped, and Pinkie was shocked to hear how weak and breathless his words were.
"But you want me to leave!" she growled. "I brought you Ponopoly and everything! is this how you treat your friends?!" she demanded.
Sunshine stared at her for a long moment, helpless to answer, shaking his head for a moment, holding the mask back up to his mouth as he began to wheeze once more, taking several long breaths, watching her, his eyes locked on her own. "...I don't want you to see me like this," he panted. "I...Don't want you to be here when it happens," he said, shaking his head.
"When what happens?" Pinkie asked, bewildered, and then poked him. "Hey! I thought you were getting better!" she accused.
The pegasus tried to answer, but was taken by another coughing fit.
The Nurse slipped around, and gently secured the mask around his face, checking his monitors and then turning to Pinkie. "...There's something Sunshine hasn't told you," she said softly.
"Like what?" Pinkie asked. "He's going to be stuck here a lot longer?" she asked, putting two and two together; the coughing, the lack of smiling, everything. He really wasn't getting better. He had been lying about it.
The nurse shook her head sadly, lifting a hoof to gently stroke through her mane as she murmured; "He's dying."
Sunshine cringed at that, and then shook his head rapidly. "N-no. I'm f-fine!" he said, his tone trembling, as Pinkie turned towards him.
"Is it true?" she demanded to know in a low tone of voice.
The pegasus wilted under her stern gaze, and his eyes lowered, before he gave a slow, gentle nod.
Pinkie could feel tears welling up in her eyes, and she shook her head rapidly. "No. You're lying," she said, snorting once. "Or your family would be here!"
The nurse gave a strangled noise, halfway between a helpless sob and a whine. "I'm the closest to family that he has, honey. He's an orphan."
She lifted a hoof to push at the Pegasus gently. "You can't be dying!" she protested, feeling hot tears start to cascade down her cheeks. "You told me you were getting better!"
Sunshine gave her a hurt look, his ears pinning back, pulling his mask away so he could speak. "B-because you never treated me like I was sick..." he panted, lifting a hoof to gently touch at her cheek. "You were always smiling...no one ever smiles around me any more. Please stop crying, Pinkie...I don't want you to cry..." he breathed, his hoof growing weak, slipping down her cheek slightly and then regaining its place.
Pinkie moved to stand closer, so he didn't have to stretch, feeling her tears splashing down on to the covers as she watched the Pegasus, she realised now, dying in front of her very eyes.
"Pinkie...smile for me. Please," Sunshine said, as his hoof slipped.
"B-but it hurts!" she protested, choking back sobs and then wrapping the pegasus in her hooves, burying her nose in against his neck. "Don't go, Sunshine!" she begged.
The pegasus shook his head for a moment, struggling weakly against her and pushing her away just slightly with the tiny amount of strength he could muster. He leaned up to rub his nose against her own gently. "Smile for me, Pinkie. Please? Just one last time?"
Pinkie bit back the sobs trying to escape, and then lifted her lips into a smile for the pegasus, watching him, feeling her tears still streaming freely down her cheeks.
Sunshine drooped weakly down onto the pillows, his eyes staring up at her smile, and the pegasus lifted his hoof to touch her cheek gently, and smiled.
The hoof fell after a few moments, and the Pegasus gave a shuddering gasp, convulsing slightly, before his body went still, and a soft droning began to echo from the monitor.
Pinkie's smile fell flat, dissolving into wracking sobs as she wrapped her hooves around the limp form of the pegasus, her tears falling onto his chest and neck. The nurse flicked off the machine, and gently pulled her away from the heart-breakingly still form of Sunshine, and wrapped her hooves around her in a hug.
The tears of the two ponies mingled as Pinkie sobbed, mourning for the loss of her first ever friend.
"I looked after Sunshine for six months now," the nurse said gently, squeezing Pinkie soothingly. "And I never knew him to smile once," she admitted, nuzzling against her gently. "You made him smile before he passed. That's something to be proud of," she said.
"T-then why d-does it hurt so much?" Pinkie asked between broken sobs, staring up at the nurse helplessly.
"Because it hurts, honey. It always hurts," she murmured, soothing the pony.
The nurse pulled away for a moment, grabbing a small container and taking it over to the sobbing pony, opening it up and pulling out a small piece of paper inside. "Sunshine wrote this for you, earlier....He didn't want you here when he passed. He didn't want to see you sad," she said in a sympathetic tone, brushing her tears away with a hoof and handing her the letter.
Pinkie stared down at the tear-blurred words. It was a short message;
Dear Pinkie.
You showed me that I could still smile. Thank you.
Never stop smiling.
It was signed with a sun, with golden rays coming off it, a big smile, and sunglasses. Pinkie looked up from the letter, to the still form of Sunshine, as the nurse drew the sheet up over him. And she felt her heart break all over again
Two days later found Pinkie Pie laying in the grass at the foot of a freshly-dug grave. The small group of people who attended the funeral had already left, and she was here, taking her time alone to say goodbye properly.
A single red balloon had been tied to a stake at the end of the grave, and was bobbing cheerily as gentle rain fell all around.
Tears mingled with the rain falling on Pinkie's face, and she stared at the freshly-turned earth that represented her first friend.
His words echoed in the back of her mind;
The Doctors say I'll be gone in a few days.
I'll be able to fly with my mother, and my father.
Pain tore at her heart as she remembered his words. He had lied to her, just so he could see her continue to smile.
A simple smile.
An orphan, dying, alone in the world with no one to help them but their nurse. And she had given him a smile. She had made him smile. Because sometimes, a smile was all you have.
Laying on the grass at the foot of her friends grave, watching a balloon cheerily mocking the sobre setting, she began to sing.
-I am here to say...I'm gonna make you smile, and I will brighten up your day...
It doesn't matter now...If you are sad or blue...'cause cheering up my friend is just what Pinkie's here to do...
And there, in the rain, choking out a song in between sobs for her lost friend Sunshine;
Pinkie smiled.