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Vet Visit Interlude

Sarah woke me by getting up to change position, and I figured we must have napped long enough since I knew I had other things to do today. Sitting up, I looked around and Sarah was back in the holding pen getting a drink from the wall-mounted water basin and so I took the opportunity to close the connecting gate, shutting her in.

She turned around as I did so and grunted. "I know, girl, you want to spend more time with me, and I'd like to spend more time with you, but I've got to get off to working on other things, and get someone in here to clean up after us. I'll be back sometime soon, Sarah." I droned as I reached through the bars to pet her, and she pressed against my hand in enjoyment of the contact, rubbing along the cage bars.

I packed up the sleeping materials and put them back in the storage closet before turning off the signal lights and unbolting the doors. Going back to the holding pen for one last time, I lifted Sarah's muzzle and kissed her goodbye. "I'll be back and we'll have some fun. You'll see." I couldn't tell if her grunt was of understanding or what, but she grunted nonetheless and went back to the water basin to lap some more.

Wheeling the cart with the gear down through the tunnels back towards the cathouse, I got to thinking about Cleo's ultrasound. Some things were real easy to see on the ultrasound machine, and others took skill to make out. I was pretty good at some stuff, but I got to thinking that I'd rather have Jim Bridger check out Cleo as I didn't know just how far along Cleo's pregnancy was, and fetii have a habit of moving around a bit if they're sufficiently developed, making it diffiult to check on them by transabdominal ultrasound. And while Cleo was relatively stretched in the vaginal department, I certainly didn't want to try stuffing my arm up her ass like I just did with Sarah. At least not without a fair deal of practice to make sure she was ok with it.

Reaching the basement of the cathouse I unlocked that door and passed through. I left the equipment on the cart and thought about things for a moment. I could give Jim a call, and he'd likely want to come over right away. He enjoyed the break from the billion-and-one common pets that made up the majority of his practice to come out here and look after more unusual critters - and usually get his picture taken with them as he treated them for whatever called him out. But therein was the rub - I couldn't exactly take Cleo on a walk through the busy grounds this time of day. The offices didn't have easy tunnel access like that offered by the cathouse and the bear dens, and Jack Bennin was likely out on the prowl, looking to annoy some poor wretch that needed his job more than his desire to stuff Jack in a garbage can.

I looked at my watch again and pondered. Then I figured I'd just go up "topside" and check on the cats, answer some of the questions the visitors have, and then head to my office to give Jim a call anyway.

Coming up the stairs to the main floor of the cathouse, I could hear the usual hubbub of dozens of voices speaking at once - par for the course of the zoo. I ascended the short flight up to the terrace level and opened the door. Suddenly a hush fell over most of the crowd, as though the star performer was about to step out on stage. I couldn't help but smile at that reaction each time it happened.

I strode out onto the terrace and looked out at the crowd and waved. "Hello, folks. How are you doing today?"

A few of them answered, mostly the children, but the majority just stood silent, watching me as I walked along the lion's cage.

"Whatcha doing?" some youngster piped up from the crowd.

"I'm just checking on the cats in here, as that's part of my job." I smiled and leaned against the railing in my usual spot by the gate to the lion cage. "Anyone have any questions about any of the animals in here?"

A couple dozen hands shot up and the adults laughed. "You, young lady in the pink and gray jacket."

"How come you have so many lions and only one tiger?" she asked.

"Well, that's sort of a complicated answer. Lions live together in groups called a pride. Kind of like how you live with your family, and maybe have aunts and uncles and other relatives living nearby. Tigers, on the other hand, tend to live all alone in the wild, and only come together with other tigers to mate, making babies. Otherwise they live all alone. Tatiana, our tigress, is even a little different from wild tigers. She was raised as a pet by an older couple as the last of theirtigers. When they got too old to take care of her, they gave her to us to take care of. But since she'd been raised all by herself, she wasn't used to being around other tigers, or anything else except people, so she lives by herself here with us keepers to care for her." I smiled. "Does that answer your question, miss?"

The little girl nodded, then blushed and looked down, apparently embarrassed at having been singled out. "Any other questions?" I asked. There usually were and I spent a fair bit of time explaining the this-and-that about how the zoo worked and how we worked with the animals.

Then someone asked the question that comes up regularly. "Can I have a lion as a pet?" Most of the adults scowled, and one even said "That's illegal."

"Excuse me, sir, but that's incorrect." That brought stunned looks from a lot of the adults. "It is perfectly legal to have a big cat as a pet in this state, as it should be. And while you, young man, are too young to have a lion as a pet without your parents' help, it is possible for you to have one as a pet when you get older." This brought disgusted looks from many adults, and cheers from part of the youth present. I continued explaining. "You see, it all depends on the interaction between the individual animal and the owner or keeper. Any animal can make a good pet for someone, and any animal can make a bad pet. It all depends on the species, the animal's individual personality, the personality of the human or humans involved with their training and daily keep, and the situation of the lives of the humans. If the human owner is one that likes to travel a lot, then having a big cat as a pet wouldn't work very well, since you can't just check them into a boarding kennel like you can a housecat or a dog. If the human likes having visitors over a lot, some personality types and some species of animals wouldn't be appropriate, as many tend to be afraid of unfamiliar people and changes in situations. They'll go and hide rather than be an outgoing greeter. Then there's some animals whose personalities are more dominant and they can get rather defensive of what they consider their territory, even if that happens to be your living room. Then there's the people who aren't dominant-type personalities themselves for whom having a more passive or submissive animal would be best, since the human would have to be able to say "no" firmly enough that the animal complies and doesn't try to repeatedly challenge the decision. All these factors must be part of the considerations before getting any animal as a pet, be it a hedgehog, lion, tiger, horse, housecat, dog, snake, parakeet, anything. And age doesn't necessarily play a significant factor so long as the human knows what they're doing. The youngest active lion tamer on record was 11 years old... though he had help from his parents in doing so, and they were quite familiar with big cat training as well."

I smiled "Yes, kids, many of you can indeed grow up to cuddle with lions and tigers and bears. Or whatever animal you have a preference for, if you and your living situations allow for it to be done right."

Another cheer rose from the kids and an equal groan from the adults. Chatter of "I want a [insert species here]. Can I have one? Pleez!" rang out through the hall. Many of the stuffier adults were saying "No, you can't have one," but I heard through the din a few saying "You heard what he said, you'll have to wait until you're older," and even a few "well, we'll talk about it on the way home." That gave me hope. I continued my inspection by going next to Tatiana, who was chuffing and rubbing herself against the cage bars as I walked past. I stuck my hand in and started petting her.

"Isn't that dangerous?" one of the adults asked. I turned around some and shook my head.

"Like I mentioned before, Tatiana had been raised as someone's pet, so it's even less dangerous than if she'd been raised here at the zoo. So for her, in this circumstance, no, it's not dangerous at all because she knows me and trusts me. If you had been up here to do this, her reaction may have been significantly different, or perhaps not. That's one of the things about owner and pet interactions - it builds a level of trust between you and the animal that is far different from anyone else trying to do the same thing. Had this been a cat that had no human interaction whatsoever - like one from a zoo that was an AZA member zoo - then it would have to depend on the animal's reactions to me, good or bad, as to how far I'd go with direct interaction, or how far I'd trust them with my life. AZA zoos forbid the direct interaction of keepers and large predators, like tigers and lions. They also don't like zoos to train their animals in ways other than for medical treatments, thinking that it's "against nature" or something like that. Here we do train our animals to perform actions - what some might call "tricks" - as part of keeper/animal bonding as well as to entertain you fine folks. It also gives the animals something to do, which is called "enrichment" in zoologial circles. Something for the animal to gain enjoyment by doing, whether solo as in exploration of new objects in their enclosures, in a group setting with communual-dwelling animals like chimpanzees and lions, or - like for us - keeper/animal interaction that provides a bit of change to their daily lives here."

Many of the adults looked surprised, and some that were seemingly disgruntled about the living conditions of the animals seemed to think about things a bit less gloomily. That, unfortunately, is one of the stygma most zoos have - being compared to prisons or "concentration camps for animals"... Unfortunate and somewhat erroneous comparisons, when one looked deeper at things. For many animals, it would be closer compared to a cruise ship vacation. True, they can't leave the ship, but there's free food, free drink, and as much to do as they choose to. Including having fun with each other, or being alone if they prefer. Interacting with the staff, or chosing to ignore them. Much of it is indeed up to the choice of the animal, provided the zoo permits interaction with their animals. It's true that many zoos don't, and that in itself is truly unfortunate, both for the animals and for the humans that care about them so much.

I passed the empty cages that used to house a tiger pair, leopard pair, and the cheetahs, then came over to the cougars, Zeus and Anna. She's on the same birth control as many of the lionesses, and so they've not had cubs the past couple seasons, but Peaches was one of theirs from years past. Anna has always been more hesitant, more elusive than Zeus has. He's quite forward and quite loving. Seeing me, he rushed the cage bars and leaped up, drawing gasps from the crowd. He put his forepaws up on the shoulder-height crossbar of the cage and I reached through and rubbed his chest, eliciting a loud purring from the receipient of my attentions.

"Is he really purring?" some youngster asked. Without turning around I responded, "You betcha. Cougars, sometimes also called mountain lions, are the largest of the Felis species - what are called "lesser cats", as compared to "big cats" - Panthera species - like the lions and tigers. Lesser cats can purr and big cats can't. Bears can purr, too, but theirs sounds a little different if you're fortunate enough to hear it. And just like housecats, cougars and bears purr when they're happy or content with what's happening, like Zeus here enjoying me rubbing on him."

"Cute," some adult commented. "So are they really like large housecats?"

Zeus dropped to all fours as I turned around and leaned on the rail once again. "Eh... kindasorta. They are in many ways and habits, but in others they're far more attentive to listening to commands and performing tasks, like big dogs. They're also less inclined to "spaz out" in situations, again, much like large dogs. This is beause just like dogs - who are descended from wolves - cats like cougars and lions are apex predators. That means they're at the very top of the food pyramid and there isn't much need for them to watch out for something trying to make them into a snack. Housecats - which are descended from asian and european wildcats - are what are known as secondary or tertiary predators, depending on ecosystem. That'd be something like foxes or coyotes in the dog world. There's things they catch and eat, and things that are out to catch and eat them, in turn. That's how come housecats sometimes react seemingly unexpectedly in trying to escape a situation with little or no overt signs they're uncomfortable with it. You don't see that in most canines, nor in the bigger cats like cougars and the rest."

Nods cascaded through the group. "Any other questions?" I inquired. I answered a few dozen more - most were common ones I'd heard nearly every day, but some were more thoughtful and were serious inquiries into something of concern. Thankfully there didn't appear to be any animal rights hecklers in this crowd, which was fine. Nothing more like trying to debate an unarmed person that only had conjecture and opinion in place of experience and fact. And of course it would be only their opinion that counted, not mine. That sort of half-information can really mess with the minds of the uninformed or young people of the crowd.

At any rate, I concluded my inspection and made my way to the matching stairs door the led back to the main level. I politely excused myself and went down to the main floor. After shutting the oak door marked "Private" and locking it behind me, a few of the group asked my name, which I freely gave them, and asked how I learned so much about animals. That question always brought a smile to my face and I answered that I simply asked questions of anyone I could, read as much as I could about anything that drew my curiosity, and never took anyone's answer for granted that didn't sound quite right. A couple of adults said I must have had fun in college, at which I stopped them and said I had no college degree, that all my learning was done through independent study, which tended to be more difficult but far less expensive than had I gone the academic-achievement route.

How I would have enjoyed staying and providing more information to the young sponge-like minds and the curious adults, but I had to dismiss them saying I had to head back to my office to make a few important phone calls, but that they could get my email address from the gate office and I'd be happy to continue answering their questions. The sad looks on the childrens' faces always bugged me, but I indeed had to head back and give Jim a call before it got too late, and to figure a way of getting Cleo past Jack Bennin and over to the cathouse.

On my way across the courtyard I saw Vic talking to one of the groundskeepers near the base of the clock tower. "Hey, Vic. Got a moment?" I called out.

"Yeah, got a lifetime of them, each one busier than the next. What do you need?" he grumped, and I smiled.

"Nothing much. You got some staffer with keys to the bear dens? Need a bit of cleanup in there after doing that internal on Sarah I mentioned earlier. She's tucked away so just about anyone could do it. Jerry's around here somewhere to supervise if you'd need him."

Vic thought a little bit. "Yeah, no biggie. I'll have someone there in... a half hour? That'd be if you can track down Jerry for him to let them in and watch so they don't get eaten."

I nodded agreement. "Deal. Thanks Vic. I've got to go give Jim Bridger a call about that lioness and then I'll see if I can drag Jerry over there."

"Yeah, yeah... bet he won't show up for an hour or more!" Vic grumped and then trudged off to take care of more messes. I didn't envy Vic's job in the least. Playing puppetmaster to the myriad of temporary workers that drifted through the groundskeeping department was sure a full-time job. Not that cleaning up both the animals' messes and the ones left by our visitors wasn't a full time job itself.

I just shook my head and went up the main office stairs heading for my hole in the world. Julie caught me in the hall, again, just as I was putting my key in the lock. "Jim, can I see her?" She was practically bouncing like one of the kids I'd just left back in the cathouse.

I looked left and right down the corridor. "Where is his royal highness?" I inquired. Not that I was afraid of Jack, it's just this would have been the worst time for him to pester me about Cleo.

"He's out at lunch, trying to schmooze one of the board members for something or another. You know how he is with his big ideas about things." Julie responded. I frowned and nodded. A lot of Jack's ideas weren't too bad, and some of them did generate income, but other ideas he'd had were downright ridiculous and overly annoying to those that would have had to implement them. My "in" with the board usually steered them away from those kinds of projects, thankfully.

I shrugged after considering Julie's request and smiled. "Sure. I was just about to call Jim Bridger to come down and give her an ultrasound to really see if she's pregnant or not. You can cuddle with her while I do that, at the very least."

I opened the door and stepped in. Cleo lifted her head from where she was sleeping on the cot as Julie and I came in. I sat down at my desk and Julie made her way over to Cleo. "Jim, how come she..." Julie's voice trailed off.

"How come she doesn't look like she's "all there"?" I smiled as I dialed Jim's office number. "It's because she's not. She has some brain damage but I'm pretty sure she can see clearly. Or at least enough to function. She has some other quirks as well, but that's the most obvious one."

Julie knelt down and pet Cleo's head with one hand and her side with the other. "Poor thing... however did you come to have her?"

Fortunately, I was saved by the phone connecting. "West Side Animal Hospital, this is Michelle, how may I help you?" came the greeting across the phone.

"Hi, Michelle, it's Jim Peters. Is Jim in with someone at the moment or is he free?" I asked.

"I think he's in with someone right now, but I can have him call you back later if you'd like," came the response. I knew Jim's habits so I'd cut him off at the pass, proverbially speaking.

"Is he in surgery? Just say yes or no if you've got someone there in the waiting room." I responded.

"No, he's not," Michelle said.

"Ok, then I'll just hold until he can grab the phone for a second. It's nothing urgently important, but it's something best done today and I'd rather tell him so he'd know about it and be able to work it in when he can rather than tack it on tonight when he'd rather go home." Knowing Jim, he'd just come out right away anyway if he could rearrange his schedule enough. If he couldn't, I didn't think he'd mind coming out after our closing time.

"No problem, I'll let him know you're on the line. Please hold." Michelle said in a semi-mechanized manner, somewhat perturbed she couldn't just take a message, but she was new and would grow accustomed to Jim's habits. Meanwhile, Julie was having fun caressing Cleo all over, and Cleo, for her part, had her eyes closed and was enjoying the contact immensely.

"I had no idea big cats could be so friendly, Jim," Julie blurted out as I rested the receiver on my shoulder, the ridiculous muzak loud enough to hear at some distance.

I chuckled. "Well, not every cat is as friendly as Cleo, that's for sure, but yeah... they're good cats for the most part. Sorry she freaked you out earlier, I didn't mean for it to happen like that."

Julie smiled at me. "It's alright, Jim. I've known you for long enough to figure what you say is true when you said she was a good kitten... and now I see it is true for myself. And you are such a vewwy good kitty, aren't you, Cleo?" Julie crooned as she scratched beneath Cleo's chin.

Cleo nodded, and Julie was shocked. She shuddered and stopped petting Cleo and looked to me in puzzlement. "Did she just..."

"Nod? Yes. That's one of her quirks. She does yes and no answers."

"That's absolutely amazing, Jim! She should be on Leno or something! You could make a fortune!" Julie was practically bouncing again, until she saw the look of horror on my face, then her mirth crashed as well. "What's wrong, Jim?"

I sighed. I didn't want to tell her. I really didn't. How could I.... hmmm. "Julie," I said in a soft voice. "What makes her special like that would also have every researcher in the world trying to get ahold of her. Mostly to literally pick her brain apart to see what made her like this. And then, even worse, they'd be trying to duplicate it on other cats. That's part of why she has to be kept a secret from pretty much everybody. No appearances on Leno, no sideshow circus tent... not even on public display here. I won't risk her life for mere money, nor the well-being of other animals. That just wouldn't be right."

Julie's expression drooped as that realization came to her from my explanation. She idly caressed Cleo's head as her mind processed the information, and she visibly shuddered, apparently at the thought of scientists inflicting brain damage on other lions to see if they could duplicate Cleo's abberation. "I see what you mean..." she stammered, nearly in tears.

I smiled and touched Julie's shoulder. "Hey, don't cry. Cleo's here, she's safe and for all I can tell, quite healthy despite her shortcomings. And she's going to have little ones of her own soon, if things are right." I winked.

"Oh, Jim... can I...?" she started to ask just as the phone clicked and I heard. "Dr. Bridger here, what can I do for you?"

I lifted the receiver back to my ear. "Jim? This is Jim Peters. I got something here I'd like you to take a look at for me. Preg check on a lioness. Got an hour somewhere in your schedule today?"

"Let me check..." came the response, and I could hear paper flipping in the background. "Yeah, I can swing by there in... like... 2 hours? That'd be well before your closing, right? It's kinda creepy walking around there when there's no one else around. Makes me feel like I'm in some sci-fi movie and all the critters are going to hunt me. Especially those damned cats of yours!" Jim joked, and I couldn't help but laugh.

"Then you should especially like this one, she's got her own version of creepy going on. But you'll see when you meet her. See you in awhile. I'll meet you up at the gatehouse like always," I said.

Jim just laughed. "Creepy lioness, huh? Well, I guess I'll find out when I get there. See you later."

The phone clicked again and I hung up my receiver, then turned to Julie. "You were about to ask something?"

Julie nodded. "Can I watch as you do whatever with Cleo to check on her cubs? I've never seen that and she's such... Well, she's such a sweetie and I'd like to be there."

I pondered this for awhile. Julie was a good staffer, and I'd known her for quite some time but just cursorily, not like how Jerry and I knew each other. As far as I'd known she'd never been in watching any of the procedures with any of the cats and she already understood about keeping her mouth shut about Cleo's unusual habits. Her demeanor would mean that she might blab about things to friends of hers, but... only time would tell with that one. I canted my jaw as I thought things through. "You might not exactly like what you see, Julie. How I think things will go with Cleo isn't exactly how they'd typically go with other cats, and one of the checks I usually do, or have done, isn't done by many zoos and is even shunned by many veterinarians...." I furrowed my brow.

"Please, Jim?" Julie said. I could see the enthusiasm in her eyes, and my expression softened.

"Well, we'd have to ask Jim Bridger too, since he's the one with the state license that could be on the line, but as far as I'm concerned you can, provided you don't tell anyone about it. Jack would have a bird of me using company equipment and company time for my personal pets, and most people wouldn't understand about how I have things done around here. You know how squeamish some people are when talking about reproduction, and even worse when it comes to "wild" animals like big cats."

Julie laughed and suddenly cuddled Cleo close, who looked to me for reassurance. "Cleo's not wild! She's a snuggle-kitty!"

I laughed "Cleo, she's alright, don't worry." Cleo's eyes slitted again and her face relaxed some, about as much as it ever did when she was fully conscious, but I could tell she was enjoying the attention from her new friend. "Yes, I know Cleo's not wild - exeptionally far from it - but others only see her as a lioness whose only place is stalking the African velt, not snoozing on an army cot in my office."

"I guess so," Julie grudingly admitted as she continued loving on Cleo.

I fished my watch out again and grunted. "Dammit, I gotta go get Jerry and head him over to the dens to meet one of Vic's grunts for some cleanup work. And then I'll have to figure out some way of getting her over to the cathouse without any of our visitors knowing she's not one of the regular zoo lions." I canted my jaw.

"Can I stay here with her for awhile?" Julie asked, her eyes pleading like a young schoolgirl's when asking for her first pony. I half expected her to go "pleeeeez!" like the youngsters I had talked to earlier.

I gave it some thought. "Well..." I frowned. "Sorry, I don't really think that'd be for the best just yet. If someone were to come looking for you, they'd find you both in here and that'd take a lot more explaining for some folks than it did for you. And they might not be as willingly complicit in my little deception as you've been."

Julie composed herself and nodded. "You're right. But I can still be with her when you check up on her cubs, right?"

I nodded. "If Jim doesn't mind, I don't mind. This time at least."

Cleo looked at both of us as Julie got up and moved to the door, and I did as well. "Be good, Cleo. I'll be back in a bit to take you somewhere new for a little while." I told her, and Cleo just laid back down and wriggled to get comfortable as I shut and locked the door behind me.

"Thanks, Jim. I'm so excited to see what her cubs look like when Jim Bridger gets here." Julie cheerily said as we walked down the corridor.

"Well, you might feel a little different when you see how she'll be checked. You might get a bit uncomfortable about it all. But we'll see." I responded.

Julie just gave me a smile and ducked into her office as I went down the steps and hurried back across the courtyard to wake Jerry and send him over to the bear dens to see to the cleanup grunt.

* * * * *

"Jerry, time to get up, this is your wake-up call." I said in a faux-feminine voice as the prone figure of Jerry Parker lay snoring in one of the bunks.

"Jerry, time to get up, this is your wake-up call. Three seconds until something happens to you." I intoned again. Jerry mumbled in his sleep.

"Three, two, one...." I mocked as I grabbed his one wrist... then started smacking his face with his own hand. "Jerry Parker, this is your wake-up call."

Jerry started awake after the second smack and pulled his hand away. It took him a little while to focus enough to figure out where he was and just who I was. "Dammit, Jim! You and your childish pranks sometimes! Jeez...."

I couldn't help but laugh. "Be glad it wasn't a bowl of warm water, or you'd need to go change.... and do some bedding laundry."

Jerry just scowled at me a bit, then smirked. "Yeah, or like my brother used to do - put toothpaste up my nose until I woke up coughing. Some brands BURN!"

I winked and then nodded my head sidways in the direction of the door, "Vic has some janitorial grunt waiting by the bear den gate to clean up the mess from Sarah's exam. It was a persistent follicle like I thought, so she's fine for the time being. I called Jim to come out and do Cleo's exam and Julie wants to come watch, so I gotta figure out some way of getting her over to the cathouse without anyone seeing. Thankfully Jack's off schmoozing someone at the moment so now would be the best time." I droned as Jerry pulled on and laced his boots.

"Why not take one of the Grunts? There's bound to be a couple not in use somewhere around the property." Jerry offered as he completed dressing and stood.

I rolled the idea around in my mind for a bit. Grunts were what we called the golf carts that had been modified for work purposes. There were a few that had ventilated boxes on the back for moving animals here and there about the property, but that was usually for smaller animals. "Yeah, I guess that would work. Would just have to park one near the basement stairs and get her down there somehow, then it wouldn't be too hard to get her out back to the loading dock and down into the tunnels from the powerhouse.

Jerry nodded. "That sounds like a plan, man. Scary thought around here." He winked.

I chuckled "You're a jackass, you know that?"

"Hee-haw." Jerry offered as he headed out the door. "I'll give you the keys back later. See you around closing."

I just shook my head and locked the rack-room back up for the time being and then headed back along the basement corridor. I started thinking just how I was going to do this with Cleo. I hadn't had "pi" with her for a couple days, so it would be fine to do a vaginoscopic exam just like with Sarah... it would be kind of neat to get that on video with her. Jim wouldn't mind, and he'd just add it to the list of quirky things I'd asked him to do over the years. Now whether he'd accept doing so on an unrestrained lioness, that'd be another matter. I didn't know if Jim was zoo or not, but I'd never asked since it would have been sort of inappropriate given our friendship, and even if I had, he'd probably never admit to it even if he was. Not really out of fear of me outing him, but just that he'd likely been denying it so long. Or even never admitted it to himself, like many vets have done over the years.

At any rate, I was back up to the public floor of the cathouse and locked the door to the basement yet again, then headed out through the brass and glass entrance doors and back across the compound... just in time to see Jack Bennin's car pull into the parking lot. Oh well, so much for moving Cleo right now. Or... maybe not. He started my way in a huff.

"Hi Jack." I offered in friendly greeting, pasting on my best McDonald's Smile(tm) to hide my contempt for the man.

"Jim." Jack grunted, never breaking stride. Well, apparently there was someone about to have a battle of wills with that conniving snot, and they likely didn't even know it yet. I felt sorry for whoever was going to be on the receiving end of that... unless it was Vic. Vic could hold his own with Jack, and Jack knew Vic had him by the short hairs. This place would indeed quickly fall apart without Vic's tireless - and usually thankless - work around here just keeping things running, even if they were hiccuping and burping now and again, like the bandorgan in the carousel. Hm... that gave me an idea for sometime soon. Perhaps when Cleo's closer to having cubs.... I tucked that thought away for the time being and checked to see what Grunts were there. Usually all the zoo vehicles had their keys left in the ignition, unless someone was using that particular vehicle for something at that time. That way someone could use whatever ones were available, and ones in use wouldn't disappear unexpectedly.

I was somewhat lucky in there was a Grunt with an animal box on the back that was available for use, so I hopped in and ran it around and parked it by the door that led from the parking lot to the steps to the office corridor. I figured that'd save some trouble. I quickly dashed up the stairs and poked my head into Julie's office. "Mind keeping a lookout for me? Jack's got back but was stomping off across the courtyard to chew on someone. That'd give me some time to get Cleo over to the cathouse."

She looked up from her desk and nodded, then quickly stepped into the corridor. I dashed to my office, unlocked the door, and patted my leg. Cleo had been sleeping but rose as bidden and walked towards and through the door, a bit more stiltedly than she usually did. Her gait evened out as she padded along behind me after I had shut my door and started down the stairs. She followed willingly and I looked out through the small glass panel in the door to see if the coast was clear. Julie waved from the top of the stairs and then disappeared back into her office. I opened the door and unlatched the door to the enclosed section of the Grunt. "Up, Cleo."

Cleo looked at me and then at the box. It was a fair bit higher off the ground than the floor pan of my Blazer, and she managed to get her front paws and most of her body up through the door. I lifted her rump and soon enough she was in the box. "Good girl," I told her as I shut the door and latched it. Just in time, it seemed, as I could see Jack heading back across the courtyard heading this way. I hopped in and tromped on the "gas" - which was sort of a misnomer because this was an electric Grunt.

Off we sped, across the parking lot and then I slowed down as I headed out into the courtyard. I gave Jack a bit of a salute as I passed him, again thankfully heading in the opposite direction. He scowled at me as our paths crossed, and I'd wager I'd hear about that when I got back to my office.

Some paths were clogged with visitors, others were nearly empty, so my progress was a speed-up-and-slow-down affair until I ducked through the "Service Vehicles Only" gate on the path over to the powerhouse, which sat on one of the furthest corners of the zoo grounds up by the railroad tracks. That's how we got the coal in for the boilers, and there was also a two-lane service road back to the building, as I mentioned that was where we got many of our deliveries. The path with the gate was led shortly to that service road, which also allowed emergency vehicles access to the main grounds of the zoo.

I zipped along happily on the deserted pavement until I got up to the powerhouse. I parked near the service door near the tunnel stairs and went inside. There wasn't too much din at the moment as only one of the boilers was fired, but when it got real cold or when we needed emergency power, it could, and did, get quite noisy in here. I knocked on the door of the old glass-walled office. "Hey, Chet. How's life out back these days?"

"Hi there, Jim." the old mechanic smiled at me, having been reading a newspaper while lounging at his desk. "It's been alright. Nothing's gone to hell in the past week, so that's a plus. How's things with the kittens?"

I chuckled, "Good enough, more or less. That's actually why I'm back here. Gotta sneak one of my personal cats in so Jim Bridger can give her a going-over. Mind keeping your crew away from this end of the building for a little bit? Just need to get her down into the tunnel is all."

Chet laughed "Still skirting Jackass Jack's puffery, huh? When are you two just going to go toe-to-toe so you can clobber that bastard once and for all?"

I smiled "He's good at what he does, Chet. The problem is he thinks he's good at other things, too. Like telling us how to keep the place puttering along." I looked through the dusted window of the back wall into the main hall. "Still having trouble with boiler 2? Or you just got the front end open for cleaning?"

"Naw, she's leaking in one of the flues again and I don't want to call out the boiler guys. You know how much they charge." Chet frowned.

"Inch and a half flues?" I inquired.

Chet shook his head. "Inch and five-eighths."

"I'll see if anyone I know has a tube roller I can borrow for that size. And the next time one of your grease monkeys jams the Corliss gear, let me beat him about the head with that skullbasher wrench. It took me three hours last time to get it reset right. Oh, and you were out of those panhead screws for the valve trips when I put it together last time. Whatever that snot did sheared that stop-brace off and I had to extract the screw stubs." I grumbled. Yep, maintaining some of the stuff around here took more finesse than many people seem to have.

Chet laughed. "Him? Fuck... I nearly threw Kody in the dumpster for that one. He means well but sometimes he's a walking disaster."

I smiled. "Well, don't go feeding anyone to my cats. I don't want to give them indigestion. Your crew gets greasier than fast food!" I winked and Chet got up from his desk.

"I'll just stand here in the doorway and you'll be fine. If I'm watching, everyone tries to look like they're busy. You know how that goes." Chet jabbed.

I chuckled. "Yeah, makes it look bad for those of us who usually ARE busy all day." I patted Chet's shoulder. "Thanks much. Oh..." I handed him the keys to the Grunt.

"You or someone else can run this back to the gate office lot if you want to. Or just put the keys back in it and leave it here. Just make sure one of your work-release guys doesn't take it for a cruise out on the streets like last time."

Chet chuckled and nodded. Awhile ago there had been a fellow that was on work release from jail. His drivers' license had been taken away for drunken driving, so he decided to take one of the work carts over to the bar down the street for his lunch break. Since it wasn't a licensed vehicle he figured he was safe... but for the fact that it wasn't work-related and he didn't have permission to take the vehicle off zoo grounds. Oops. So he had another 90 days tacked onto his sentence, 30 of which he HAD to spend locked up.

I headed back down and let Cleo out of the back of the Grunt. She leaped down in her typical awkward manner and followed me. She was a little hesitant on the three iron-grating steps up to the service door, but once up she was fine heading inside. I pointed down the corridor past the one wall of Chet's office and there the hall had one door to the left, to the shower and locker room, and the steps to the tunnels was straight down. Towards the other side of the building was the long ramp that also went down to the tunnels, for work carts and other wheeled apparatus to descend with their loads of whatnot. Reaching the bottom of the stairs, I unlocked the door to the tunnels and on we went.

That end of the service tunnels was pretty clear of any other paths to turn off. Some places, like beneath the courtyard and by the carousel and pavillion gazebo it would be very easy for someone to lose their way. But we quickly navigated our way to the door to the cathouse basement, and through it we went.

Cleo was a bit hesitant at stepping through as I'm sure she could smell all sorts of scents belonging to the animals who dwelt there, and perhaps its dim lighting reminded her of a place she'd been back at the labs. Either way, she was a lot slower than usual in following me. I unlocked the door to "the park" and waited for her to come up to where I was standing.

"Here you are, Cleo. You can wait in here for me." I smiled and stepped into the room, flipping on the lights.

Cleo stepped into the room as well and then looked all around. I don't know if she'd ever seen someplace like this, either out and about or wherever. I shut the door behind us and sat down on the loafing shelf as she explored everything, including sticking her nose into the water fountain and then drawing it back quickly.

"Don't like the water, Cleo?" I asked. She shuddered a bit and shook her head.

"Are you afraid of it?" She shook her head again.

"Does it make you feel cold?" This time she nodded.

"Well, when we're done with this and I take you home, we'll have to get you a bath... that is, get you all wet with water to clean you up. But it'll be alright, it'll be warm water. You might even like it." She looked at me with her blank gaze. I didn't know if she was trying to decide if I was being truthful, or if she was trying to say "yeah, right, buddy. Like hell I'll like it." But either way, she padded over, hopped up on the cushioned seat, laid down and wriggled around a bit. I pet her tummyfur and chuckled. "This part of you is going to get all gooey, but it'll clean up easily." Her face relaxed at the tender petting. I checked my watch and saw it was getting close to time to head to the gatehouse and meet Jim.

"Are you going to be ok in here, Cleo?" I asked. She nodded and sprawled out on the shelf. I smiled and rubbed her head lovingly before heading back out through the door. I flicked on the red light, just in case someone happened to come through.

* * * * *

"Hey, Jim. How've you been?" I said to the smiling, roundish face that greeted me at the main gate.

Jim Bridger, being a bit of a cut-up, gripped the bars of the fence near the gate and pressed his face between two of them as much as he could. "Warden! Warden! You just GOTTA let me back in! Please! I can't stand it out here any longer. These people are CRAZY!"

I couldn't help but laugh. "Goofball." Jim extracted his head from the fence bars and winked. "You bring the truck or did you come in your car?"

"I brought the truck, just for shits. Why?" the vet asked.

"Was wondering if you happened to have your microchip reader with you." I replied with a shrug. "I don't have one back at my place, y'know."

Jim suddenly looked confused. "Why would you need a chip reader. I know none of your cats here have chips...." I just smiled and shrugged.

Jim rolled his eyes. "Yeah, yeah, I got one. Let me go get it."

I went out through the turnstile and walked along with him. "So, how's the world been treating you lately?"

Jim shrugged. "Can't complain, really. Same old shit, most of the time. Except what you trick me into." He winked and elbowed me.

I couldn't help but laugh at that. "But Jim, you're so good at not saying "no" when I come up with things for you to do around here. It's almost as though you like it."

Jim turned to me and then started laughing a bit, shaking his head. "That's the problem, I DO like it. And not just for the pictures to hang in my office, like you've seen me do. It's not every day I get to work on big cats and the other animals you have around here, so it's like a mini vacation from the cats and dogs and horses and cows.... It's like the old vet joke, you spend thousands of hours with your arm up a cow's ass so you can graduate and spend thousands of hours with your arm up a cow's ass."

I winked. "Or giraffe, or elephant, or bear...."

Jim chuckled. "Yeah, yeah... but at least the elephants give me a "thank you" afterwards. And we won't mention what Sarah wants to give me."

I laughed heartily as we arrived at his truck in the public lot across the street. "Yeah. Sure scared the hell out of you the first time she tried, didn't it?"

Jim poked me in the ribs for that one. "Yeah... and Michelle complained about the snotstains on the crotch of my pants that evening, asking what I'd done. I told her it was bear snot and I don't know if she believed me or not. But then again she has to have something to complain about or she's not happy."

"With all you give her and little Billy, she should be fairly happy, shouldn't she?" I asked, somewhat surprised.

"You'd think, but she likes to grumble about the late-night calls and stuff like I do out here. And Billy isn't so little anymore, he turned 10 two months ago." Jim answered, digging around in one of the compartments of his truck vetbox, before fishing out a white device.

I looked surprised. "Billy's that old now? Geez... I remember when he was just a little shit and you'd bring him out on calls."

Jim smiled as he re-locked the compartment. "Yeah... I finally had to move that picture of him with Zera the lioness into my office. Was getting too many complaints from Billy and always a few disgruntled looks from clients that I'd let my kid be with such a dangerous animal."

"Well, normally they would be right but Zera took to Billy well enough. She was a fun cat..." I reminisced.

"Yeah... I felt bad when you had me put her down." Jim nodded.

"Shit, Jim... It wasn't the perkiest day of my life, either. But you know that." I frowned.

"Yeah," Jim agreed, "I know you care deeply about all the animals here, and I don't envy you all your worries about them. I'm just surprised you don't have an ulcer or something over it sometimes."

I chuckled and shrugged. "Got enough sleepless nights... and a couple over this girl you're about to meet."

Jim looked curious as we walked back to the zoo. "One of yours?"

I nodded. "Yeah... just got her recently, and wanting to check what I was told - that she's indeed pregnant and wouldn't mind a guess as to how far along she is. But, you must know that she has some odd habits and sort of an odd appearance. It makes it so I've got to keep her under wraps, so I'll depend on your professionalism on this one."

Jim nearly broke out laughing at that last part, his smile huge. "Professionalism... hell, you just need me to keep my big mouth shut, and no photos with her."

I pondered that for a moment. "No, I guess photos would be alright so long as you don't share them on the internet. Anyway, you'll see what's up with her in a bit." With that, we reached the gate and I unlocked the personnel gate to the side of the turnstiles and let Jim through.

"Oh, I should have asked if there's anything more I'd need before we left the truck." Jim commented as I shut the gate behind us.

I thought for a moment. "I don't really think so, apart from that scanner. Everything else that we'd need should be here in one of the treatment rooms of the cathouse. At least I think we'd have everything." I furrowed my brow as I ran through what I'd want to have done. Vaginoscopic exam, ultrasound... She'd need a bath afterwards but that would wait till we got home without too much trouble, would just need to throw a horse blanket over the back seat so she wouldn't get transducer gel all over... "Oh, with ultrasounds do you prefer full or empty bladder?"

Jim looked a bit startled. "You know, I never really thought about that before. That and it's not that often I do a scan on a lioness. Will you have her out so I could try both ways? I'd imagine you have foleys there."

I shook my head. "Don't want to knock her out or even sedate her, but you should be able to cath her without any trouble. I'll be there holding her and... oh yeah, Julie wanted to watch and help."

"Julie?" Jim inquired. "You been holding out on me, Jim?" He chuckled. He always liked making fun of my bachelorhood, and I usually quipped back about my "girlfriend" - Peaches - never bitching about my hours or how I keep house.

"Naw, she's one of the office girls here. Well, the head office secretary. You've talked with her often on the phone, I'd imagine. You go pick out a comfy four-seater golf cart - one of the ones with the keys in the ignition - and I'll run up and get her," I responded.

"Oh, ok... this way, right?" Jim pointed in the direction of the employee lot.

I turned around from where I was heading to the main stairs. "Yeah, that way. See you down there in a bit."

I climbed the stairs and started down the hall.

"Jim Peters." I heard a familiar voice call out from one of the offices. I frowned and turned around and stuck my head in the office door.

"Yes, Jack?" I inquired, with that McDonald's Smile(tm) pasted on my face again.

"How come you've not gotten your monthly expense reports in for last month? You KNOW we can't do the presentation to the board with outstanding balances like that." Jack Bennin was seated behind his desk and tapped a pile of papers that were likely the expense reports of the other departments for the previous month.

I sighed. "Jack, I know. But I think you know what all I go through in a day just keeping animals fed and trying to keep them healthy. Right now I've got Jim Bridger waiting downstairs for me to go do an exam on a lioness. I came up here to grab Julie because she wanted to watch and help."

At that, Jack frowned. "You KNOW office staff aren't supposed to be just grabbed for other departments' needs like that. They're here for a reason."

This was my turn to get a bit defensive. "And you KNOW that now and again things have to happen that you don't like, and that many times I'm shorthanded for people that CAN help when things go wrong. If Julie wants to learn how to help out with the cats, I have no right to say no. She's an employee and she's covered if anything happens. And with this girl I DO need help to do what we need to do."

Jack fidgeted behind his desk. "Well......" he grunted, "... just make sure she clocks out! It's bad enough to grab her away from what she's supposed to be doing, but I'm not going to have it come out of the office expense account to do so. She'll be a volunteer for that!"

I shrugged. "I'll tell her. Anyway, nice chatting with you again, Jack." I smiled and ducked back through the door into the office next door before he could say anything else.

"I heard." Julie said as I popped into her office.

"Would be kind of hard not to, given how flustered Jack gets. I'm surprised the people in the gift shop didn't hear." I commented as she got up, logged out from hercomputer, and grabbed her coat.

"Sometimes they do, when it's quiet down there. I've heard interesting comments from time to time." She smiled and quipped.

"You won't need that..." I said, pointing to her coat, "unless you're not planning to come back up here before you go home for the day."

"Oh!" Julie smiled and put her coat back down. "Habit, y'know."

I nodded. "Yeah, I know. Anyway, Jim's waiting by the carts."

We went down the side stairs and out the door, then along the path to where the carts were usually parked. "What took you so long, Jim?" the vet asked as we met him and I plunked down in the driver's seat of his selected golf cart.

I opened my mouth to say something but Julie beat me to it. "Jack Bennin had to open his yap about Jim not doing some paperwork... again."

Jim Bridger laughed. "Naugty, naughty, Jim. You know the zoo isn't run by people... it's run by paperwork. Whatever would Jack do without killing all those trees to satisfy his bean-counter urges?"

I couldn't help but smile. "Oh... maybe.... run for public office? Either that or be a proctologist's favorite patient, given how constipated he would probably get."

We all laughed at that last part as off we went buzzing down the paths towards the cathouse.

Being as it was later afternoon there were fewer people about than when I moved Cleo earlier, and we quite readily navigated our way reasonably quickly around to the entrance to the cathouse, parking the cart on a bit of lawn near the main entrance doors. "Well, here we are. Shall we go see to our task?" I smiled and got out of the cart, taking the keys with me lest it wander off somewhere for us to walk back to the gatehouse.

"Yeah, time for me to meet your mystery lioness. Just hope she's as calm as you made her out to be, Jim. I don't want to get diced and chomped if she gets upset," Jim offered, even though he likely really wasn't that concerned.

"Oh, she's such a sweet cat," Julie commented as they waited for me to unlock the door down to the basement rooms, "I got to pet her some earlier today. She's such a sweetie I don't think she'd have any problem with you checking her."

Jim looked to me. "Does she know what all we usually do?" Jim thumb-pointed to Julie.

I shook my head. "Don't think so. I don't think there'd be any problem but Cleo might have an issue with some of it. I know a fair bit of her background and likely she'd had tests like this before... at a time in her life far less pleasant than now."

Both of them stopped on the stairs behind me and looked curious. "What's that supposed to mean?" Jim asked.

"You'll see." I responded.

Julie answered him for me. "Cleo's got some brain damage, Jim said. She... doesn't..." Julie kind of blanked out at that moment, likely not knowing how to explain everything.

Jim Bridger nodded. "Oh, gotcha. She's likely been through the wringer with tests of all sorts, and not necessarily from gentle guys like me."

I nodded. "That's a fair bit of it." I said as I led them to the door to "the park".

Julie piped up. "I'd never been down here before. Kind of mysterious, isn't it?"

Jim and I both laughed, and I unlocked the door and opened it for them. "Oh, we got all kinds of secret stuff down here, including Dr. Frankenstein's lab!"

Jim offered, "Don't you mean, Mr. Peters-stein? You're the pervert that put most of this in, I remember." He then froze as Cleo lifted her head, apparently having woken from a nap as she lay on the loafing shelf a couple feet from where we were standing as I shut the door.

"Jeez, Jim. She DOES have a creepy look going on with her, doesn't she? I thought you were just winding me up before." Jim Bridger said as he was captivated and probably a little unnerved by her mile-long stare. Cleo growled a little and looked to me.

"It's alright, girl. This is a friend of mine and he's here to help check on your cubs." I said as I moved over to sit on the edge of the loafing shelf with her.

Cleo growled again, a little. Jim seemed a little unsettled at her reactions. "You said she was ok to work with, right?"

I shrugged, "I'd wager it's your scent... that medical scent, you know." I leaned down and kissed the top of Cleo's forehead. "Are you worried he'll hurt you?" I asked.

She nodded, while Julie made her way over to Cleo's other side. Jim nearly jumped. "Did she just....? She couldn't have, right?"

Julie smiled and we both seemed to nod at the same time. "Yep... she seems to understand human language... at least to some substantial degree. I have no idea just how much she does or doesn't "get", but... she seems to be able to answer reasonable yes-or-no questions." I looked at Cleo again. "Will you let Jim here check on your cubs?" This time Cleo gave a halting nod.

"Do you trust me, Cleo?" She nodded enthusiastically. "I won't let Jim hurt you or your cubs, ok?" Cleo seemed to accept that answer and leaned her head against me, but was still watching Jim. Julie was petting Cleo's side throughout the whole conversation.

Jim looked at me befuddled. "How can she....?"

I pondered how to respond. Julie was there by me and she thought Cleo just had some weird accident or something causing brain damage, not that she'd been tinkered with. Jim kinda had the right to know exactly what he was treating here and why she was peculiar in some other respects, not just her mental aberrations, but to tell him would put his ass on the line, too.

"Ask me no questions, I'll tell you no lies..." I finally said.

"But one of these mornings you'll find a surprise." Jim countered. "Ok, I get it, you're trying to insulate me somehow. Not that I don't appreciate it, but most of the time I prefer a full case history to know what exactly I'm dealing with."

I frowned and nodded. "I know, Jim. I wish I could tell you everything all the time, but Cleo here is a bit of a hot-potato because of her quirks. I'm in neck-deep by having her, but I've no right to suck anyone else in any more than I need to."

Jim nodded as he dragged the cart over. "Oh, yeah, foleys. Where ya keep them?"

I looked to Julie, then Cleo. "I'll be right back, you two." Cleo nodded and that brought a surprised chuckle from Jim Bridger. "I don't think I'd ever get used to that..." He said as he followed me into the larger exam room.

I began looking through various drawers and in lower cabinets for the proper size of foley catheters. I found one box but thought they might be a little too big, but I sat it on the counter anyway.

"We're alone now, so can you let me know SOMETHING about her? Why all the cloak-and-dagger?" the vet asked.

I canted my jaw as I looked at him long and hard for a moment. "Ever hear of ReCirq Labs, Jim?"

He scrunched his face. "Animal testing place owned by that wackadoo Steve Meers, right? Didn't they close?"

I nodded. "And they liquidated nearly all of their animals, yes. Up the chimney form of liquidation. Even the endangered species."

Jim frowned. "That's horrible, but what's that got to do with Cleo in there?"

I was a little shocked at Jim's apparent ineptitude. "She's one of the few that made it out, illegally. Technically she's stolen property, so that's why I want to know if she's chipped or not."

Enlightenment dawned on the vet's face and he seemed even more concerned. "Might not be that she's chipped, Jim. She might have a full tracker. Or tagged DNA or something." I nodded. "And her... skills... you saying they created her that way?" I shook my head as I finished looking through the cabinets. "Gamma knife to fry parts of her brain after brain mapping. But you already know too much. Just accept her quirks as flukes and we never had this conversation, ok? And yes, you'll see she has more quirks in store."

"She's not pregnant with alient children, is she?" Jim quipped as we headed back through the door and I dropped a couple catheters and some bags of sterile saline on the cart.

"I sure hope not, I'd not appreciate them eating their way out of her. She's a really sweet cat and I've come to love her a lot," came my retort.

Julie looked horrified. "What the hell are you two talking about? Is something going to eat its way through Cleo here?"

I couldn't help but laugh as Julie became defensive of my lover. "Naw, we were just joking about if she were pregnant with alien young."

Julie scrunched up her face. "You're really sick, you know that?"

"Sick... and ill, too!" I said in a demented tone of voice.

Jim couldn't help but laugh at that. "Always knew you were some kind of pervert!"

I turned to Julie and head-nodded in Jim's direction. "That from a guy who sodomizes animals for a living!"

"Hey, at least I use gloves!" Jim responded with a wink. Julie just shook her head.

I pet Cleo some as Jim fiddled with the stuff on the cart. "Vaginoscopic check first, Jim?" the vet asked.

I thought for a moment. "How about scanning her first? I'm kinda curious."

Julie looked at me. "Scanning?"

Jim got out the scanner and turned it on, moving it about a few inches above Cleo's neck, upper shoulders, upper forelegs, upper hindlegs, and even her tailbase. "He's scanning her to see if she has an RFID identification microchip implant somewhere."

"No chips as far as I can find, but I'd have to do X-rays to be sure. This only tracks the two main manufacturers. If they made a custom one I wouldn't know it and this wouldn't show it," the vet commented.

"Ok, well, figured I'd have you check anyway," I shrugged and pet Cleo some more.

"On to the next item on the to-do list?" Jim inquired.

I nodded and turned to Cleo. "I know you like Julie's attention but we need to check on your cubs now. Can you lay down so your rump is right at the edge of the shelf?"

Cleo nodded and stiffly got up. She haltingly padded around in a figure-8 in her mechanical manner and then laid back down with her tail dangling over the edge of the shelf nearest Jim Bridger. Jim, for his part, watched curiously and just shook his head. "Never going to get over that..." he muttered as he put on a pair of gloves and squeezed some lube from the pump onto his fingertips.

I got up on the shelf and put one leg to either side of Cleo's head. "Can you roll onto your back, sweetie?" I asked her, and she readily complied. I worked my left leg closer until Cleo was cradled some. I laid back against the wall, tilting my upper body back, and then lifted her by her shoulders some, scooting my rump forward, so she was somewhat propped up to look down her body while resting against mine.

Julie looked curious. "Are you going to.... put your fingers up inside her?" she asked Jim, who was rubbing his gloved fingertips together to spread the lube out. Both Jim and I nodded, and I offered, "And then he's going to put a scope up inside her to check her cervix to see if it's tight like it should be if she's pregnant."

Julie looked a little shocked. "Wouldn't that... hurt her?"

Jim shook his head in response. "Not with using lubricant, no. Or in some cases no lube is needed because of the female's reproductive hormones. Just depends on the species."

"Or individual," I added. Jim looked at me with a momentary curious expression, and then he realized what was up.

He put his free hand on Cleo's abdomen and then gently slipped first one, then the second digit into her feminine folds. I'm sure he noticed her internal slickness as she fidgeted a bit from the contact.

"It's ok, Cleo... it'll be alright." I crooned, hoping to satisfy her. "Jim's just going to put something up inside you to check on you, and he's getting you ready for that."

Cleo seemed to relax some and we all watched Jim's actions with interest. Julie just sat on the edge of the bench and was petting one of Cleo's inner thighs as Jim felt around for a moment, then reached back and grabbed the tubular vaginoscope.

To call it a vaginoscope is a bit of a misnomer, it's more dildo-cam than tubular scope, since it doesn't have an open center section to pass instruments through to the far end of it's length like many veterinary vaginoscopes. This one was purely a video-only instrument and did that job quite well. Jim gently spread Cleo's puffy labia and started slowly pressing the rounded end of the device into her.

"Jim?" Julie asked. The vet and I both responded simultaneously with "Yes?"

Julie pointed to me with a bit of a chuckle. "That Jim." She turned to face me. "Is it normal for her to be so... big, down there?" she inquired.

"You mean her vulva being swollen and large? No, not usually. However there are parts of the brain that are involved with hormonal reactions, so that is likely just normal for her," I offered in response.

Jim, for his part, sort of played along. "She's also a lot wetter inside than most lionesses would be at this stage if they're pregnant." He commented as he watched the video monitor, occasionally glancing back to Cleo, who was just laying there as she was, cradled by me, and watching both the monitor and the other humans with her unfocused stare.

Soon Jim got the scope up into her enough to see her cervix, which was indeed tightly closed. "Yep... see that, Julie? That's how her cervix should look if she's got a litter in there, or if her body THINKS there's a litter in there."

Julie looked confused. "What do you mean, "if her body thinks"? Wouldn't it know? I mean, you're either pregnant or you're not, right?"

Jim and I both shook our heads and he started withdrawing the scope, at which her vulva and tunnel started gripping the instrument on occasion, clearly wanting to haveit remain in place. Jim answered matter-of-factly. "Well, sometimes things happen in some animals and their hormones just kinda keep going even though there's no young ones developing. Whether that's because of the foal or cub or puppy being resorbed when it was just a cluster of cells, or whatever. Some animals have what are called a "false pregnancy". Many times it quits after a few weeks or months, depending on species, but other times it goes the whole 9 yards, so to speak. Their body tricking itself into growing larger, producing milk, and even going into labor to deliver something that isn't there. For those females, there's usually some sort of lethargy or - for lack of a better term - depression afterwards because their body got them all ready to have young ones, but there weren't any, so it kind of causes a mental crash for them."

The scope was now once again out of Cleo and Jim looked at me. "Want me to cath her now, or after a first try?"

Julie looked to me. "Cath?"

"Catheterize her bladder. I was asking Jim before if it was easier to do transabdominal ultrasound with a full or empty bladder. Since we'd never tried both ways before, we figured it'd be worth investigating. I know for women they usually want the bladder full, but Cleo's not human so... we don't know. He'd have to catheterize her to be able to put fluid into her to fill her bladder," I explained.

"It won't hurt her at all. Maybe just a little discomfort because these catheters are a little big for a lioness... or so we think," Jim reassured her as well.

Cleo looked up to me. "Yes, he'll be putting a tube into you. It'll feel weird, but you'll help us know for other cats as well as when we go to check on your cubs again."

Cleo seemed to accept that answer as Jim opened the paper package, exposing the rubber tube which was soon to make its way up inside her, with help from the metal stylet running through the center of the one passage.

"Got a 20cc syringe here, somewhere?" Jim asked.

"There should be one or two Luer Lock ones on top of the cart, there. I thought I saw them when I had this out for Sarah before," I answered.

Julie looked at me. "You were doing this to Sarah before?" she asked and I nodded reply. "Did you put that thing up into her, too?"

"Same concept, different scope, but yes," I answered simply.

"He probably had his arm up her rear, too. Knowing Sarah. She seems to enjoy that." Jim offered as he put some lube on the catheter and then put two of his gloved fingers back inside Cleo, which brought about some twitching from the "patient".

"Wouldn't that hurt her? I mean, your arm's so big..." Julie seemed a bit aghast at what all is done in for reproductive checkups.

"For some bears, yes. For her, she seems alright. Only has to stretch a little for me to reach what I need to inside her." I answered.

"You guys are kind of sick, you know that, right?" Julie grumped. Jim and I both laughed.

"You should see how Jim here gets semen from Goliath, if you think that just from doing a transrectal ultrasound on Sarah," the vet ribbed me.

"Oh, you know you like to see me all sweaty from that. One of these years I'll get around to building that machine I'd been talking about," I jabbed back.

Julie looked confusedly at the vet as he positioned the catheter and started slipping it into Cleo. Both females seemed to tense up a little and I leaned down and kissed Cleo's nose. "It'll be alright, girl. Just a little different sensations."

Jim paid me no attention and he responded to Julie's querying look. "With elephants you get their semen by stimulating their prostate and ampullae - glands up inside them - by... well... basically fist-fucking their ass. Then they blow their load a time or two and totter away with a happy look on their face."

Julie looked disgusted. "You two ARE sick!" I couldn't tell if she was being serious or just putting up a front. I just shrugged. "That's life in the zoo, Julie.

Either do things by knocking out the animal, or do things in a way they seem to enjoy. Like this here. Cleo's accepting something totally unusual and if she didn't trust me and Jim, she'd have had to have been knocked out completely."

Cleo jerked a little bit as I noticed Jim give the catheter a little shove. "Got it... it's inside now," he announced nonchalantly.

Julie looked at me. "Why'd she twitch?"

"Sometimes it hurts a little when you push the catheter through the ring of muscle at the entrance to the bladder. That's what she was responding to. Just a little flash of pain." I answered. "Isn't that right, girl?" I commented, smiling down at Cleo. "The worst part is over with now. The worst you'll feel is an odd full sensation."

Cleo seemed to accept this and half-lidded her eyes as Jim inflated the retention bulb of the catheter and a little urine came out to drip down onto the floor. Jim then set about setting up the ultrasound machine and selecting a transabdominal probe. "Should I shave her, Jim?" the vet asked.

"I'd rather you not. I know it might muck with the image, but that's why I called you out rather than doing it all myself. You're a bit better at transabdominal than I am," I said.

"Comes with practice, Jim. All those prissy pet owners with precious Foo-Foo the pedigreed pussycat or some little froo-froo yap dog they're worried about." I just nodded at Jim's comment. It's true that he did get a lot more practice with ultrasound machines than I did. Then again, he was the vet and I'm just a zookeeper.

Soon there was the squidge of conductive gel on Cleo's exposed tummy and she shivered. I gave her a gentle squeeze with my legs and pet her chest with one of my hands.

"Now you see why I'll need to give you a bath later. But I promise you'll like it," I murmured.

"Scared of water, is she?" Jim asked as he rubbed the probe around a bit, smushing the gel into her tummyfur and matting it down like some old man's bad combover.

I nodded. "Kindasorta. Don't know exactly what it is just yet that bothers her. Haven't found the right questions to ask to get the clear picture."

Jim laughed heartily. "I still can't get over the fact that she can answer you like that. Just.... weird. Helpful, I guess, but weird." He was rubbing the probe this way and that. "Well, I see one heartbeat so far..."

I couldn't help but smile at that, and Julie nearly bounced as her face lit up. "She's gonna have cubs!" the secretary squealed. I half expected her to start giggling and waggling her feet like some elementary school child.

Jim ran the probe around some more. "There's two..." there was motion on the image mapped on the ultrasound screen. Something small, about the size of a pencil eraser on the screen, wiggling in a rhythm as old as time itself. Jim moved the probe around some more. "There's number three...." he commented as a similar motion appeared elsewhere on the screen. "I think that's about it."

"How far along do you think she is?" I asked. I was rather curious to know the answer since Jeff said I might have to watch her rather closely when it came time for the birth.

"How long's a lioness usually take?" Jim asked.

"105 days," was my reply.

"Eh... They're usually about the size of like Dane or Saint puppies, right? So... eh... maybe halfway along? I'd guess 40 to 50 days, but that's just a guess. You know I don't really have that much experience with the zoo animals." Jim was right in that he wasn't out here too often. Well, at least not as often as he'd like to be. He was out to my place even less frequently, apart from parties and the like.

"That's good enough for me, Jim. I just really needed to know if I had to start taking precautions and watching her closer." That was true for the most part... and for other reasons, too.

"Precautions... you mean like having a birthing kit handy like with red-bag horses? Yeah, you've got awhile to go yet before she's due." Jim nodded to emphasize his remark. "I'll try it again with her bladder full, now, if you don't mind."

I shrugged. "I don't mind if she doesn't." I smiled and winked.

"Goof." Jim quipped back and connected the IV bag to the catheter, then started squeezing the bag gently.

Cleo looked up at me as he did so and I smiled at her. "Just take as much as you can, hon. I know it feels weird but your cubs are safe and healthy and you're going to have three of them." She seemed to settle down until one point when she voofed a little and I nodded to Jim. "I think that's her way of saying she's full."

"Ok, I'd buy that. She took about three-quarters of the bag so that'd make sense." He grabbed a surgical clamp from the tray and clamped the catheter before disconnecting the mostly-deflated IV bag. Again, he took the transducer probe and started checking Cleo. She squirmed a bit more than before.

"I know, girl. I know you feel like you really need to pee. He'll let it all out of you in just a bit and then we'll be through." Cleo started panting a little bit, clearly uncomfortable but making no real move to get up or dissent from the activities.

"Seems like I'm getting a clearer picture of the uterus itself but can't see the cervix or vagina as they're blocked by the bulge of bladder. I'll keep that in mind for next time, or for if I have to do urinary checks on any of the cats," came from Jim, who was talking to the ultrasound monitor he was facing, though speaking to me. "I do see something going on with her ovaries, though. There's no Corpus Luteum. These..." Jim shut his mouth quickly. I just nodded.

"There's something else going on with her ovaries, but I can't tell exactly what from this machine. They look kind of.... shriveled, somehow. Rather odd." His brow was furrowed as he stared at the monitor, the reflection of which I could see from where I was sitting.

"How would you check on that, usually?" I asked, curious.

"Exploratory... either full or laporoscopic," came the vet's response.

"Well, that can wait for after she has the cubs, right?" I asked, concerned.

"Yeah, it might be nothing, too. These 2d ultrasound scanners leave a lot to be desired. Even the 3d ones are weird about some stuff like that. She's good enough to have cubs as far as I can tell," he said as he removed the probe from her abdomen and cleaned it off.

I was glad to hear that, and Cleo was relieved when he released the clamp and she "peed" the clear fluid onto the floor right there by the loafing shelf, some splashing onto Jim's boots. He then deflated the balloon and gently slid the catheter out of her.

"All done, Cleo." Jim said and smiled at her. She relaxed in my cradling as Jim set about packing up the equipment and putting all the throw-away materials in one pile.

"See, that wasn't so bad, was it?" I asked. Cleo nodded. "Want to get up now?" She nodded again and half-rolled to her feet, then sat down and curled to sniff and lick her vulva.

Julie smiled at me. "Thanks, Jim." She laughed. "Both Jims. I'd never been involved in something like this before."

"What'd you think of things now?" the vet asked.

"I still think you're perverts, but you're men so that's no surprise." She smiled broadly and I could tell she was at least somewhat joking. I was inwardly relieved that she wasn't truly upset about what we did with the animals. That might leave some hope as to her accepting what _I_ do with animals when no one else was around.

"Oh, yeah... I just enjoy being shit on by all kinds of creatures. And don't forget the blood stains," Jim quipped.

"Naw, I know you really love getting squirted with pus from abscesses. Your clothes reek for weeks afterwards, even after going through the wash." I winked.

"Jackass." Jim retorted, but we both smiled.

"You going to be ok in here for a little while longer, Cleo?" She nodded. "Please don't lick the goo off your tummy, it might make you sick." Cleo nodded again and stopped licking herself, getting up to circle the shelf again and then flumping down on her side, sprawling out.

"She is quite a cat, Jim. I'm glad you have her." Jim wasn't usually one for giving compliments unless he really felt it, and I nodded, smiling gratefully.

"Well, shall we head back to the gate?" I asked, checking my watch. "Park's closing in 20 minutes, and I know you don't like walking the grounds alone, Jim."

"Jeez. I can't tell this guy anything personal..." Jim winked at Julie, who did giggle this time.

Up we went back to the golf cart and soon we were headed back across the somewhat-deserted zoo grounds heading back to the offices and the main gate.