Too Human - Too Furry
#3 of Too Human Pal
Momma always said life is like your ass hole, full of shit. That for me has at least been true. It's been three months since I returned from the animal controlled parallel world. If you don't remember or don't know what I'm on about, then you really need to do some catching up. Anyway, now that I'm home everything seems somewhat different. You may recollect that I was on my stag night when I stepped through the magic door, that's what I like to call it, so you would expect me to be married by now, right. Wrong, when I came back my fiancé decided to leave me. I'm not sure why, maybe it was because she didn't love me anymore but it was more than likely because I told her what EXACTLY happened to me in the other world. Her first idea was to slap me around the face and threaten to ring the funny farm. She did cool down and everything was all right, but I think I pushed it a little bit when I asked her to wear a strap on tail. I recently took some time off work and went on holiday to Scotland to get away from the English weather, hey don't judge me I was really bad at geography in school. That didn't help, it just felt like something was missing from my life. I decided it best to abandon my one and only motto, 'If it's wet drink it!' I actually decided to go tea total, I know what you're thinking but trust me it has helped me to think straighter. The only side effect is that I am now an unsocial able vegetable that only works and vegetates on the couch. My apartment is a complete dump, I don't do anything towards keeping it clean and just throw my dirty clothes on the floor. After all, the floor is the biggest shelf in the house. The only two people I told about my experiences were my ex-fiancé but you know that already and the other was Frank. After the reactions from both of them I decided not to tell anyone else. Frank reacted in his usual immature way of making pathetic jokes including, 'I'm looking after one of my friends dogs, if you want you can come with, that is if you're feeling horny,' and the always popular, 'had any old dogs recently.' See what I have to deal with! I honestly don't know how he comes up with so many. I am at a loss, I hate life and that's a fact. Everything just went down hill since I left the other world behind. I miss her... I think I fell in love with her and I can never stop thinking about her. Her perfect body, her winning smile and her big orange perfectly lovely tail... you're drifting again focus damn it. Anyway, like I was saying I really miss her I don't think I'll ever love another women like I did her. Oh my god! I'm having romantic feeling about a talking fox that I knew for just three days! I really should start drinking again, I really chose a bad time to stop. It's really weird because I have got into a lot less fights with people I cannot possible beat since I've stopped drinking. Then everything changed one faithful night when I was sat alone in my apartment watching series 5 of scrubs one DVD, which I just bought. The doorbell rang loudly and I rolled my eyes pressing pause on the remote to save my place. It rang again making me even more annoyed at the persistence. "Alright I'm coming keep your hair on!" I shouted loud enough so that the person on the other side could hear me. I flung open the door and couldn't believe my eyes. It was the pizza delivery guy and he was early, hey that would surprise anyone. "That's £7.99 please boss," he asked taking the pizza box out of the protective bag and handing it to me. "Oh yeah sure," I reached into my pocket and pulled out £8 exactly giving it to him, taking the pizza and shutting the door. I had just sat down and opened the pizza box ready to take a slice when the doorbell rang again. Severely annoyed now I placed the box to one side and paused Scrubs once more. "Look I haven't got any change so I can't tip you..." was all I could say before I opened the door and I was once again shocked by the sight before me. "Jenny! What the hell are you doing here!?" I exclaimed with my eyes protruding on stalks. "Oh you know I was just in the neighbourhood, well several neighbourhoods, and I thought I'd look you up," she said quite unemotionally with a half relieved half tired look. "Hang on back up, several neighbourhoods, how long have you searching for me?" I asked questioningly as by the manner of how she was clothed it looked as if she had been wandering for a while. Her thin v-neck top was ripped and grubby in places and the same goes for her jeans. "I don't know the time exactly but I'd say about... 3 months," she sighed in relief. "Three months!" I shouted at myself with again wide eyes not believing what I heard. "Yeah about that, listen do you think I might come in because I haven't been inside a warm house for a while," she was shivering quite a lot with her arms crossed and cold misty breath pouring out of her mouth. "Oh sorry yeah come in quickly get out of the cold," I moved aside quickly motioning for her to come in. I couldn't take it all in, I couldn't believe just how lucky I can be some times. I know what I was missing in my life and it was her. She padded herself in through the door rubbing her arms vigorously to try and get some warmth back. As she walked past me I took the liberty to take a look at her tail, god how I missed that big orange bush. She walked around the lounge a little obviously not caring that she had to wade through a layer of clothes. I saw her looking hungrily at the pizza licking her lips and sniffing at the air. "Please take as much as you like," I pointed towards the box with a smile. She immediately grabbed a slice and chomped it down with a look of deep satisfaction. I watched her swallow down more pieces and remembered how much I loved to see her happy. It was like roll reversal, last time we were together I was in her world lost and confused. "So how did you get here?" I finally asked making sure she had enough time to fill her belly. She gulped down he mouthful so she could speak, she was polite like that. "Isn't it obvious, I got here the same way you did," she said rolling her eyes slightly. "So you came with me but ended up in a completely different area of the country," I tried my best to understand but as you well know I'm not very good at this. "No, I ended up in London I just didn't know where you lived that's all," she sounded a little bit annoyed which was understandable so I didn't take offence. "So you went around and knocked on the doors of every house you passed just to find me," I asked feeling very special that she loved me so much she would go so far as to see me again. "No I just looked you up in the phone book," she replied in a 'you dumb ass' sort of way. "And there was me thinking you made an effort, so why did it take you 3 months to find me?" This was a good question when you think about it. "How many Norman's do you think there are in London?" Okay so it was a bad question that should have really been obvious, but remember who I am. "Oh I see, so what happened when you knocked on the door of all the other Norman's?" Now this is a good question and I actually considered any and all sarcastic comments she could reply to this before I asked the question. I'm learning, I'm slow but I get there in the end. "Well some slammed the door on me, some swore at me then slammed the door and some of them laughed at me then swore at me then slammed the door on me," she took another slice of pizza and began to eat it. "What a bunch of assholes," I replied scowling a bit at the other Normans who missed a great opportunity to meet a great person...ummm vixen. When I thought about it a bit more I would have probably done the same. Then when I thought about it a little bit more I probably would have been drinking a lot at the time so a talking fox wouldn't have been much of a surprise. Another thought occurred, it made me quite sad. "But this means you can never go home," I said with a large amount of remorse. I think she heard but just choose to ignore the question. "Have you got any clothes I can borrow these are a bit dirty," she asked politely tugging at the bottom of her shirt to show just how dirty they were. "Yeah sure give us a tick," I strolled casually into my room and took a look in my wardrobe. I found the perfect outfit; it was some of my ex-fiancée's clothes she left and hasn't picked up yet. "Here these were my ummm... sisters clothes but she won't be needing them," this would be a good screw you to my ex-fiancée. She took the clothes in her paws and threw them aside giving me that wonderful smile of her. I'm being really honest when I say this, but I didn't even think about this until now. She took me in her soft arms and I once again felt my body tingle as her fur tickled at my arms. "Oh I've missed you Jenny," I gave a look of love and she gave one straight back. Maybe it's fate, maybe we're supposed to be together, and the only thing that really matters... is that she puts out like crazy! We shared a tender kiss making me think back to when we shared our very first kiss. I fell over her sofa and smashed my head through her table before the second kiss so I tend to remember the first one. I put one arm around her and she giggled as I led her into my room. "Lie down on the bed and I'll give you a welcome back gift," I asked her sweetly helping lower her onto her back. I led between her legs and unzipped her trousers throwing them idly to the floor afterwards. Her perfect puffed pussy was ready and waiting under her quite smelly panties, remembering she hadn't changed for some time, but the smell just added to my own excitement. I placed my hands underneath her furry backside supporting her slightly as she parted her legs even wider. Luckily I'm a man who likes a mildly hairy crotch or otherwise I would be in for a long and painful night. It wasn't exactly difficult to pick past the fur as she was well inflated and visibility was easy. She quivered wildly and let out a small moaning howl as I ran the tip of my tongue up her slit making small circles with it when I reached her clit. She grabbed onto the bed sheets pulling them towards herself, with her eyes closed she let out another long moan as I darted quickly in and out of her labia. I probed a little deeper tasting her cum that was yet to make an appearance. Spoke to soon as a torrent of juices flooded out like water out of a dam. It tasted so good and she hadn't even reached orgasm yet. I would soon fix that as the delightful fragrance drove me wild and I used the whole length of my tongue to penetrate her. She was arching her back clawing at the bed sheets rolling her head around with a wide-open muzzle. A loud and long scream of ecstasy pored from her lungs and I received a generous helping of vixen cum. She panted heavily as a lapped away greedily swallowing down as much as I could in one mouthful. I raised myself away from her crotch and sat with my legs hanging off the edge of my bed making sure to savour the sweet residue that still resided on my taste buds. She decided to repay my wonderful welcome back gift with one of her own. She sat up taking me by my belt unclasping it and knelt down before unbuttoning my flies. It wasn't easy for her as it had become somewhat tighter than usual down there, probably something to do with the fact that I have a raging hard on but I'm no scientist. I loved the feel of her smooth fur on my shaft as she stroked all the way down from tip to hilt on the underside with the back of her paw. She gently clasped her hand around my length and slowly moved it backwards and forwards. I was a bit dubious of this because of what happened last time she pawed me off. A wonderful familiar feeling rose up in the pit of my stomach and pleasure was mine to be had. She cupped my balls with her other hand and played with them like Chinese worry balls, rolling them gently in her hand. The warm soft feel of her soft pads giving stimulation to both cock and balls made me groan loudly. She decided to repay my wonderful welcome back gift with one of her own. I could tell she wanted it bad as she nipped slightly at my bell end using her teeth to rake along it. I'm not one to usually mix pain and pleasure but I had to admit that felt pretty good. She stopped teasing me and went full on taking me in as much as her muzzle would allow. It felt so good to feel the sucking inside of her muzzle pulling back only two take me in again. I moaned again as the suction increased in speed and force. She bobbed her head up and down lightly making short work of me resilience not to cum. I put two hands on the back of her fuzzy head feeling it's softness and only applying a small amount of pressure. The pleasure became more and more intense as she again increased her speed. I had to stop her, it took all my will power to gently tug her away from my aching cock. She led once again on her back but this time with her legs in the air. This was fantastically familiar as I took hold of her legs and guided my way to her wet hole. Placing just the tip between her lips, which parted them slightly, I looked at her with loving eyes and she did the same. I went slowly pushing inwards only an inch at a time, she bit her bottom lip hard as more and more of my shaft entered the warm confines of her cunt. I closed my eyes as I hit the hilt with a slight bump against her bottom. Withdrawing at a small increase in speed I took myself completely out of her only to ram back in with an ever more quickening pace. She let out a small whimper each time I withdrew and slammed back. She bucked her hips into mine and we developed a nice steady rhythm. Plunge after plunge her whimpers became more powerful as she began to reach her second orgasm. I was nearly with her as well as I could feel my cock twitch wildly inside her wanting nothing more than to fill her up. I became more animal like with my speed and ferocity sending shockwaves of pleasure throughout my body making me groan loudly. The wonderful feel of her cunt muscles tightening around my lustful shaft sent me over the edge as we shared a long and loud climax. The intense feeling triggered the unstoppable reaction of cumming and I could feel my own powerful jets of sperm mixing with her own cum. It all came to a sticky end as I pulled out we a slopping sound and rolled over breathing heavily. She panted away madly with stars in her eyes still gripping tightly onto the bed sheet. "WOW! I really missed that!" she panted looking up at the ceiling. "I missed you," I rolled over to face her and we shared a kiss and a cuddle. I love a good cuddle after sex, it seems to me to be the icing on the cake. "Pal where are you its Frank, I need that DVD from you I want to know what happens to J.D!" he shouted carelessly to my apartment. I rapidly gathered my clothes and threw them on telling Jenny to clean up. I finally clasped my belt and asked Jenny to stay put until I told her to. I stepped out of the bedroom to find Frank tucking into the last couple of slices of now cold pizza. "There you are," he exclaimed when he saw me coming into the lounge approaching him. "Listen I've got someone pretty special with me right now and I'd like you to be serious for a moment," I pleaded knowing that Frank is never serious, but there is a first time for everything. "Oh yeah who is she, sorry my mistake, what is she?" he laughed evilly spraying pizza across the room. I gave him a harsh scowl and opened the door signalling Jenny to enter the lounge. "This is Jenny," I introduced the quite shy vixen as she had only met one human before that believed she existed and had not slammed a door on her. "Yeah hi nice costume, Pal seriously where is it?" he impatiently asked moving around the lounge searching for it. He obviously didn't understand, I kind of expected this. "Frank this is not a costume, this is Jenny the vixen I told you about in the parallel world," I presented her with two arms open wide trying my best to sound convincing. "Okay so you paid some hooker to dress up as a fox and come round here so you can prove to me you're not crazy, really Pal its pathetic now stop stalling where is it?" He really can be quite closed minded at times but its fair enough I suppose. Jenny walked straight up to Frank and slapped him hard across the face leaving a large red mark. I just laughed my ass off as Frank cradled his wound with one of his hands with a look of shock on his face. "Really she is real, look touch her," I chuckled trying to calm myself but it was just so funny. Frank raised his free hand and stroked down her face over her muzzle. Jenny didn't like that at all but if it was enough to convince him then it would be worth it. Frank took two steps backwards wobbling slightly with wide-open eyes. "Its... not... a costume," he finally realised. We stood in silence watching Frank as he took it all in raising his head with a shocked look. "You know what this means Pal," he said still with a surprised look, he was taking this better than I expected. "No not really, what?" I was getting impatient with him with crossed arms. "You're not as crazy as I thought," he managed to let out a small short laugh. The red mark had disappeared and sadly it seemed so did the pain. "Maybe you should introduce yourself more formally," I told him with a look. Jenny was the first to make a move. "Hi, I'm Jenny," they shook hands and she was going to forgive him for calling her a hooker. Then he used one of his pick up lines on her. "Hi I'm Frank, I'm a gynaecologist and I think you're about ready for a check up," almost every girl in London knows his suave attitude. Unfortunately for him, every girl in London knows he's a twat and yet he still manages to pull. He always uses that one and I almost knew he was going to do it but I gave him the benefit of the doubt, what an idiot I was. It would never work on Jenny. But to my surprise, she stepped right up to him with a huge smile on her face. She stroked around his neck and he quivered like me when fur touches my bare skin. Holy crap! How the hell does he do it, that's just not fair! Thankfully she was just messing with him and I didn't expect what happened next. She grabbed him around the head a drove a knee swiftly into his gentleman's area. Frank looked like his head was going to pop in pain overload as his expression was of pure agony. Like one of the greatest knockouts in history he fell in slow motion to the ground cupping his balls with both hands making an oval shape with his mouth. Jenny walked away into my bedroom with a satisfied look on her face. Needless to say I was in hysterics as the stupid bastard finally got what he deserved and I only felt pity for him because I know what its like to be kneed in the privates. "She hates me, doesn't she," he wheezed weakly still holding onto to his precious parts. "Yeah," I shook my head and patted him lightly on the shoulder. The next morning I awoke to the most perfect sight you could hope to see on a morning. No, before you ask I did not have an erection that doesn't happen to me very often. I flipped over and came face to muzzle with my beloved. She was so gorgeous everything about her was perfect, perfect body, perfect breasts, perfect fur, perfect pussy and a perfect tail. Okay, now I had a hard on. I remembered how much I loved to watch her sleep she looks so at peace. "Wakey, wakey rise and shine my sunbeam!" I violently shook her shoulders and shouted in her ear. "What do you want!" Somebody's not a morning person. She stirred a little grumpily it took me a while to figure exactly why and made a mental note not to do that again, I thought I was being cute. "I was just waking you," I kissed her softly on the lips, which was returned when she came to her senses a bit more after her volatile awakening. We joined in a hug and she obviously felt my erection press against her crotch as she gave me a cheeky smile. "Hey Pal where's your athletes foot spray!" he was standing in my bedroom doorway and scratching at his one lifted foot hopping slightly on the other one. "Frank, what the hell man!" I bellowed at him angrily. "Oh tetchy little bugger in the morning aren't we sorry if I killed the mood, it's just after sleeping on that couch of yours I think I've caught something," He certainly had killed the mood, Mr. Happy has gone back to sleep, well he was up all night 'hint, hint'. "Yeah it's in the bathroom... wait a second! Did you just say you slept on the couch all night!" I again shouted at him with a look of horror and shock. Jenny had exactly the same expression. "Hehehe yeah," he had the biggest grin on his face I could have hit him. "You sound like a fox howling when you cum!" he was laughing uncontrollably holding his stomach with tightly shut eyes coughing in between hysterics. "That was me you pervert!" Jenny shouted at him and lunged towards the door. If I hadn't had held her by the ankles I swear she would have killed him with her bare claws. Frank laughed his way out the door closing it behind himself. "That fucking bastard!" Jenny shouted harshly relieving her tension on my carpet with her claws. "Only you could make those words sweet," I hummed giving her a smirk. One day somebody is going to learn that Frank a lesson and on that day I will be there. A quick change later, I was doing some light tiding and by light tiding I mean moving enough clothes so I could get to my fridge. I hadn't been shopping in... well lets say a while so I didn't really have anything edible. Jenny noticed me struggling and told me she could easily find something for breakfast as long as I had basic things. Ah yeah problem with that. "What is this!" she pulled out a blue green solid slab that looked almost gelatinous even though it was a solid mass. "It's either blue cheese or old fish," I said thinking very carefully just what that could be and when I last had either of those two things. "Oh my god! Is this mould!?" she screeched holding her noise and removing a cup with an oddly coloured fuzz growing out of it. "Hey be careful with that! That's Lenard!" I jumped up and took the cup from her cradling it in my hands then placing back him back in his spot in the fridge. "Lenard?" she said confusedly shaking her head with her muzzle scrunched up against her face. "Yeah, I'm growing him... hey I got bored at Christmas and I wondered what would happen to cranberry juice if I left it for a while," I said rather nonchalantly. "It's the beginning of August!" she yelled back at me with a gapping mouth and wide-open eyes. As long as she doesn't find the cup I stowed away three years ago I might be okay. So what if I have some weird habits but can you honestly say you don't have any? After an interesting breakfast, which I will not go into further detail, we sat arm in arm on the couch watching none other than Scrubs. It was the weekend so it's not like I had to go to work or anything. Then she said something that startled me a bit. "Pal, I want to see more of your world, I want to go outside and meet more human people," she asked looking up at me with a cute little sad face. "Not a good idea, you don't know what other people are like, if there was enough of your species living in my world they would go to war with you simply because you are different!" I exclaimed trying not to make it sound like I was angry with her. "I can't stay in your apartment for the rest of my life, I need to get out and establish myself amongst your world, don't you want me to be happy," her face was so sad. Oh bugger it! She's playing the bloody 'do you want me to be happy' card, damn it why can't I meet one woman who doesn't play that card. I thought for a minute trying to think of a reasonable way to reveal her to the rest of society. "Okay lets be rational about this... how about we shave you?" I thought it was a good idea but for some reason she didn't seem to. She gave me a look of disgust... oh shave her right now I get it, ha who ever came up with that idea. "Remember I had to reveal you to my people and you were just as different to them as I am to your people," she finally gave me smile which I gladly returned, I held her even closer to me feeling her soft fur brush up my arms. "Alright, I did warn you but why not catch up on the news before we go anywhere, I want to make sure there's no lynch mobs hanging around London," I sighed giving in. I new very well I was going to have to show her to the world, eventually. I switched on the television to BBC ONE. "Breaking news today as reports have been confirmed of a new species that has been discovered right here in Great Britain. It is believed that this new species are relatives of prehistoric creatures as there is nothing like this ever-recorded in history. As of yet it seems that these dinosaurs are not among the fossil records so they either have only just been discovered or they predate the fossil record." A reporter spoke out of the TV making both me and Jenny step closer to it. "Jenny, when you came here you're sure nobody else followed you?" I asked gulping slightly. "I-I don't know... maybe, it could be possible," she said with her eyes fixated on the screen. "The two dinosaurs have been taken directly to Bristol Zoo and will be kept sedated until a suitable enclosure can be built for them. We now bring you live footage of the press conference with Gordon Brown speaking on behalf of the nation." "They're dragons moron not dinosaurs, some people are just so thick!" I shouted at the screen. "This is terrible, how can they do this?" Jenny was nearly in tears. "Today we have witnessed a great event, an event that may very well change the archaeological world forever. The discovery of these two creatures will undoubtedly become one of the greatest discoveries of the last centaury." "Turn it off I can't watch anymore of it!" Jenny squealed hiding her head under my arm. If I didn't actually know the two dragons I would feel no obligation to act. But I do know them, I know them to be straight up guys who can't handle their drink well. We had fun together, from what I could remember, and I did shoot one of their friends so I kind of owe them. I knew what I had to do. "We've got to get them out of there Jenny." To be continued... obviously * * *
I apologise for not having any screw ups in Gordon Browns speech but I kind of needed it to make at least some sense. Anyway he is my Prime Minster. I am not going to leave it there, for obvious reasons, so expect to see the next one soonish.