how to clean your pet dragon
Hello dear readers .im a minotaur an like some some of u i have a pet and he is a dragon. we get into differnt type of things . but 1 day things were pretty slow i got pretty bored an i went to the mouth of my cave an i hollered 4 my pet to come your master has need of you . an in short order he comes to the cave an ask wat is i want of him i said pet its in the middle of spring an im pretty sure u havent had a bath since early fall u scales are really dull very little color to them an he starts to look at me like he knew wat comeing up. i said pet your ripe as hell other words u smell pet an ur scales needs to waxed trimmed a bit u need cleaned up so im gonna give u a bath . when i said bath he says oh no an starts to back up then he turns an runs . he had this thing about water ever since we went killer whale fishing an i used him 4 bait lol but thats another story 4 another time .but i had to run an chase him down an tackle him to the ground an subdue him with a collar on his neck an a very heavy stainless steel chain then i drag him back to the cave with him clawing the ground an screaming an begging all the back to the cave . then i take to a chamber there i shackle him to the wall then i have to chain his hands togather so he wont hurt himself then i muzzle him as hes setting there hes looking at me half mad and half scared i tell him now pet its not that bad i go back deep in the cave an come back with a 50 gallon drum of jet fuel then i start to promptly pour all over him an he starts to kick an roll around i tell him to quit then when the drum almost empty i make a little trail so i can light it a safe distance without me getting singed i wasnt to worried about my pet most dragons are fire an heat proof but after i made my fuel trail the drum was empty an i put it back where i got it then came back to where he was then i took out my bic lighter then i flicked my bic then i put it to the end of the lite trail i made it lit an took off in a second then it went to where my pet was his eyes wide open in fear then my pet lit up like a great big bonfire. then the flames went whoosh all up around him like i said most dragons are fire an heat heat proof no matter how hot they get. as soon as i seen the fire was going good an he was ok i went back to kitchen an got me a package of polish sausages an buns an chips an a cold drink then went back an watched the fire burn down when it got low enough i opened the sausages an put 2-3 on a stick an roasted them right there an had lunch ..so after awhile when the fire went out an the heat died down i went an hooked up a hose to the fire dept water hydrant turned it on an went back in an hosed down my pet draggie an washed the soot an dirt an old burnt scales off of him then i went back an turned off the fire hydrant then came back in the cave an i took the muzzle off him then i took off the chains on his hands an threw him a towel an told him to dry off he looked at me he was some upset i asked him wat was wrong he said sir i dont like wat u did . i said like wat do u mean like wat i did i said pet i had to set you on fire like that to get rid of the scale rot he said no master not that then i said wat then . draggie said when u roasted those sausages over me like a camp fire . i said dammit pet i was hungry your no easy task i should have gotten me a frog or a goldfish .now pet we need to shine u up a bit then i went to my work bench and got my 12 in black an decker beltsander an came back in an pluged it in an made him stand still while i used it on him to take off the rough spots then i went and got my maguires industrial strength car wax an a wax pad then i started to wax him all over he loved that part he murred an purred then when i got done my pet looked like a brand new dragon i was proud of him when i was done he was so bright i had to put on super dark sunglasses so i would hurt my eyes when i looked at him . an he liked it to after i threw him a couple a deer i managed to catch lol . the end