Shattered Glass Chapter 6: New Steps
New Steps
"What!?" came slipping out of my mouth. At this point I thought I was in a coma and that this was all just some dream. I would go ahead and call it a fantasy if I had ever fantasized about Alki. Why in the world would a big jock have a crush on me? Hell I didn't even see reason in that. I wouldn't even go out with myself. What possible qualities could he possibly see in me? I was abandoned my whole life pretty much.
My parent only raised me from a cub to about 5, after which my dad split to never be seen of again. My mom said he went away on a Business trip and that one day we would see him again. I knew now that was a lie, but whenever I ever brought up the subject to find out what really happened to him she would always tear up and not move or speak. After my 9th birthday she sort of got weird and stopped being a parent. I've really been raising myself since I was 10. I didn't and still don't know trust, friendship, bonding, or really anything that would help me in society. I liked it that way, but at the same time it made me down and alone.
Since then I have been avoiding people all my life. I always looked straight past and through everyone. On many occasions someone from school would try to be my friend, to be nice, and I always just ignored them or said "No thanks, sorry". I simply wasn't interested, or at least that what I told myself. I wasn't sure how to have a friend or how to pick them out, plus the fact that I have been told many times that I wasn't "polite", as if their opinion mattered to me.
I looked back at Alki and asked the simple question "Why?" He didn't respond right away. He just looked into my eyes, as if his soul was seeking my soul in search of answers. I didn't look away; instead I stared at him back with a quizzical expression on my face. Eventually he blinked and put his muzzle a few inches from mine and licked my nose. I didn't react to it and I didn't want to. We've only known each other for what was still officially one day in my mind.
"I've been getting to know you. It's been tedious and hard with the way you hide and stalk around. I've asked a lot of people about you and each one was able to piece together parts of your life for me, and who you are is amazing. It may not be to you, but to me it's amazing what you have gone through. In fact I think it's very noble what you have done, even a lone wolf doesn't even put up with as much as you have. Not only that but you are the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. Under that rugged outside I see you on the inside. I've seen the way you have avoided looking at me, yet stole glances when you thought I wasn't looking. I also saw how embarrassed and uneasy you got when I got naked and tried to make you come swimming with me. That wasn't on purpose of course, I swear I did pack some swim trunks but oh well it was fun either way for me. But turns out it wasn't fun for you, why is that?"
He moved his mouth as if to say more but closed it and turned around and slowly started walking towards the door. "Sorry" he said softly as he rounded the corner of the room into the small hallway. I had two seconds before he left the door to say something. I had no idea what I should say, or what would have been the correct thing to say.
"No!" was what came out of my mouth. Not making much sense I added "Wait!" He stopped and turned around. I swear I saw some tears in his eyes, ready to fall if he had left the room. Having stopped him I had enough time to say the reason, the real reason to answer his questions. "I thought you were straight. I mean you're a jock, you're big and buff, and you play the part so I figured it would be best by trying not to creep you out. I just didn't know..."
I stopped midsentence as he came walking towards me. He put his muzzle beside my right ear and gently whispered "Books aren't always as they seem. Sure they might have a terrible or odd title, but the title always usually some fact that applies to the story, but it's the details that fill in the blanks. Yes I'm a jock, that's my title, but my details are that I am a lot gentler than I look and that I am head over heels for a lovely little husky."
Now it was my turn to tear up. He gently leaned over the bed and carefully sad me up so he could wrap his arms around me and hug me properly. I in turn returned the gesture and squeezed him as hard as I could, which in my condition I'm sure was more feeble than normal. I did however swear I heard him purr, I thought only Domestic Feline Furs could purr though... Oh well I'm not going to debate science and genetic modifications right now.
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A few days pass and Alki continues to come visit me, as well as brings me meaningful gifts. I only wished the nurses and doctors gift were so joyful and happy looking. I'll take flowers of any variety any day over these needles and diagnostic tests. At least however the doctors have brought me some good news, such as all my bone injuries are small fractures that will only take 3 or 4 weeks to heal, No internal bleeding or head trauma, though they still keep avoiding my questions. That's normal though, doctors don't want to get sued after all.
I've also got to add, I always imagined what a life of only sitting or laying down would be like. Well I now know it sucks. Even with without my limited movement I doubt it would be any better, simply not enough to do. The only thing that brightened my day is when Alki came and spent the afternoon with me and helped me catch up on my school work.
Alki has been the best thing that has ever happened in my life. Even when I was a cub my parent only helped me live by feeding me and providing the basics. Other than that it was up to me to figure out the rest. They tried sometimes but neither one of them were perfect parents. Sometimes my mom or my dad would play with me, but they were always so busy they didn't have much time. The only good memory I have of my Father is when he used to build 'Link N' Logs' with me. However his face was mostly a blue in the image. I still remember some stuff about the way he looked, such as his really sharp pointed ears, and his bushy take. He also had pure white fur everywhere that covered his body from head to toe.
I guess Alki was my father figure in a way. He's helping me learn stuff that I've been left behind on, or corrected some things I learned on my own. In fact I sort of wish he was my actual father, but I think I like him as my mate better. Speaking of which, it has not been officially confirmed yet if he is my mate. I guess now is as good as time as any really.
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It was finally my last day in the hospital. I guess you could say it's been a long time, though only for me it was a week. I wonder how much school I've missed in 2 ½ weeks... AlkI had brought me the majority of the work I missed and well as homework assignments and helped to get through them. There was some stuff such as a group project and research paper that I could not do in the hospital because I didn't have access to the materials needed to do them. I wonder if I would be excused from those assignments or if I will have to do some dumb essay about the importance of whatever topic teachers choose to give student when they miss something that "important". Weird I'm not sure why I caring about school anyway right now, or in general. Maybe that Coma did more head trauma than they told me. Then again it could be Alki... Was he bringing me out of my deep hole I've been hiding myself in? Or Maybe it is still the drugs and the pills I am taking now? I do feel a little lightheaded still so for now I'm going to go with that. I literally do not have the energy to analyze what I have felt for the last week.
Sitting in my room waiting for the nurse to come in and escort me out, I start to wonder more and more about Alki. That leads me wonder where my life going to take me. As I see it, I have two clear options which both break down to me either being happy or alone. Having two options available to me is very weird, not to mention something new. Most of my life I just went with the flow, or did without care whatever I felt like. Now I had to choose, and unlike anything else in my life either one of these choices was going to play a life changing affect on my life. Whatever choice I make when I do make it I will have to live forever
The nurse comes swiftly into the room disrupting my thought by immediately asking questions that I for one didn't care about for two found irrelevant. How am I feeling? I'm feeling like I just got run over with a car, oh wait that is sorta what happened now isn't. Do I feel lightheaded? Of course, I've had little to eat and I'm on drugs. Seriously are the questions even necessary?
The nurse finishes writing whatever she was scribbling on her clipboard with a contract of paperwork on it and tears off a form for release and hands it to me with a pen and tells me to go ahead and sign it. I scratch my name down haphazardly hand it back. She walks out of the room momentarily and comes back with my clothes I arrived in. I can still see the blood stain on them, but I can tell they had been washed toughly. She puts to clothes on the bed and asks to stand up so she can perform some last test to make sure I have enough balance and coordination to be safely released. She has me do a bunch of things like follow her figure with my eyes, walk in a straight line and jump up and down. After that last one she said she had just a few more left and I sighed noting my left arm in a lighter cast then it was to begin with. They must have taken off the old one and replaced it with one to allow more maneuverability since my bone wasn't fully broken. I tilted my head gauging how much pain I would be in if I decided to do a handstand and braced myself. At this point she tilted her head quizzically and as she did so I flipped over on myself into a handstand. I felt a sharp sting but it went away after I was in the full stance. She had a gawking expression on her face for a few seconds before removing it and stating "Well it appears that you have exceptional control of your body. You are free to leave" and points to my clothes and leave the room for me to change.
As the door closes I pull off the gown I've been wearing. I remember a few times where I had been helped showed and cleaned off and handed a new gown but its all pretty much blurs that I will no doubt soon forget. I reach for my pile of clothes and start putting them on noting the blood stains on them. I remind myself later to take a closer look and see if they will be removable.
I walk out of my room and proceed to find the closest flight of stairs. I have always preferred stairs to elevators, for some reason I just didn't trust them. A lady came up to me dressed in white and asked if I needed help. Instead of my usual smug reply I said simply "No thank you" and went on searching for the ever elusive flight of stairs. It wasn't until I was on the other side of the building that I reached a door with a crude descriptive picture of what was behind it.
I opened the door and made my way down calmly, which was new thing apparently. Calmly, oh that's right I'm still under the influence. Another one to add the "because I was drugged" list. I made my way down to the first floor and walked out of the front door. It smelled so weird to be outside, and it was loud and bright. Well I have been for all practical and intensive purposes dead for almost 3 weeks. However my sense of direction was not impaired and I started head to my house until I remember that while I was in the hospital I never saw my mother once. It was always Alki who was by my side. I stopped and face the opposite direction and started making my way to my private resort. My mind flipped from "why my mom didn't come to see" to "Where was Alki?" Surely he knew I was being released today. I knew it 4 days ago...