Jack (A Walter Fox Story)
JACK (A WALTER FOX STORY)
by Little Bill
(WARNING: The following story contains references to sexual activity between humans and sentient alien animals. Please do not read this if you are a minor or are offended by such material. But if neither is the case, enjoy.)
(AUTHOR'S NOTE: This story follows the stories "The Furry Sex Scandal" and "The Furry Sex Scandal: The Aftermath".)
I felt no small sense of trepidation as I drove toward the home of the human I was supposed to interview, dear reader. He was the man who initiated the scandal that nearly ruined my career at PERC, or Planet Earth Research Center, which we animal-people had established to learn about you Earthians. As the head of the sociological department there, one task of mine was to interview as many humans as I could, subject to approval both from the Director of PERC and the Earth authorities in charge of watching over us. I had some input who I chose to interview, but in this case I was compelled to interview this person because of the aforementioned scandal. He was not somebody I cared to meet again, but I knew I had to. The arrangements were made by my superiors and off I went, driving in my PERC-provided sedan and carrying a bunch of recording equipment.
I arrived at the apartment complex where the man, whose given name was Jack, was residing. I produced my portable phone and called his home number as arranged. He told me where to park in the complex's parking lot, and I found the space described and parked my car in it. I was expecting to see him when I entered his apartment, but to my surprise, he was right there when I stepped out of the car.
He was surprised in turn when he saw me dressed in a yellow-and-red outfit with black zigzag patterns; presumably he had assumed the tan-and-turquoise outfit with spirals I had worn when we first met was my standard outfit, like one sees in Earthian cartoons. But I had no desire to wear my other outfit, which was my favorite and which I generally wore on special occasions. Despite the unpleasant circumstances when we last met, Jack seemed inexplicably happy to see me, and came up to me as if to hug me, but I quickly turned and started pulling my rather unwieldy recording equipment out of my car. He offered to help with it, and I was tempted to say yes, but I politely refused.
"We are going to have our interview in your apartment, aren't we?" I asked.
"Well, yes," Jack replied. "I wanted to make sure you got in okay."
I looked toward the apartment complex, which appeared rather run-down. "Is this a high-security apartment?"
"No, no, nothing like that," Jack said. "I just wanted, well, to make sure you didn't have trouble."
"That's kind of you," I replied, and we went in and up the elevator to Jack's apartment on the top floor. The place seemed rather depressing, and when Jack let me into his apartment, I was expecting to see a lot of furry-related material, but there was none. At first I assumed he abandoned the furry community the way my friend Frank did, but Jack led me into his bedroom, and there were the furry decorations I had been expecting.
"I live with a roommate, and he's not a furry," Jack explained.
"'Roommate' as in someone you share living quarters with, but not a personal relationship?" I inquired.
"That's right," Jack replied. "We have our own bedrooms and our own lives. He's not gay, in case you're wondering."
"Ah," I said. "I was expecting to interview you in the living room, because your bedroom is a bit cramped for the purpose."
"Sure. I just wanted you to see how things were," Jack said, and we arranged things in the living room to allow for my recording of the interview. Jack then got out a piece of paper and wrote on it in black marker: "PLEASE ENTER QUIETLY, I'M HAVING IMPORTANT COMPANY".
"Your roommate is out, I assume," I said.
"Oh yes," replied Jack. "His job has him travel a lot, so he may be in and out at any time of the day or night."
"I can relate to that," I said.
"Well, he's not a sociologist," replied Jack. "We get along okay, but we live separate lives. I can tell you more about him, but I don't know if I should."
"No, don't bother. I'm here for you, not anybody else."
This seemed to please Jack, even though he must have known that I was not visiting him out of friendship. "Shall we get started with our interview?" I added.
So we did. I formally asked for legal permission, which Jack readily gave, and when recording began we made our formal introductions. Then we sat down in facing seats and I gave him the standard interview about him and his background, how he became a furry, and so on. Of course I had already interviewed quite a number of human furries, and my conversation was almost routine, as long as I avoided referring to the awful events involving Sammy Skunk.
But inevitably I had to do so, and when we did, both of us got quite uncomfortable. Normally, if I had to ask someone about a subject they were reluctant to discuss, I could figure out a way to soothe them and eventually cajole them into opening up about that subject. But in this case, I was personally involved and there was nobody to soothe me.
"You hate me, don't you?" Jack asked me rather abruptly. "Go ahead and be honest."
"If you mean that I feel the urge to harm you, the answer is no," I replied. "In fact, one reason I was chosen for my position at PERC is that I have the tendency to forgive people who do me ill. To a point."
"And I passed that point?"
"Let me explain how I feel," I said. "My first year out among you humans was rough. I was often viewed with scorn, fear, or hostility. I was insulted, patronized, snubbed, even physically attacked more times than I could count. I had to absorb it all and not fight back unless I was in danger. I had to maintain my cool. But I kept going on, hoping that eventually the Earthians would get accustomed to us animal-people and not think we were dangerous monsters.
"But besides the hostility, there were people, mostly members of the furry community, who viewed us as sex objects. Getting hit upon for sexual purposes for me was more frightening than the worst threats of violence. In fact, I was fully expecting the hostility, but the fact that there were many humans who viewed me as a potential sex toy took me by shock.
"I suppose I should bring up Sammy Skunk. He was PERC's head mathematician, and he had desperately wanted to visit Earth. He did, but the trouble was, his job did not allow him to go out and visit humans, and he was very displeased with that. He kept pestering me with questions about what Earth was like and got on my nerves. He got on the nerves of everyone else at PERC as well. So when I was supposed to visit a human furry convention as a public relations gesture for us animal-people, I got the idea, why not bring him with me? Then Sammy Skunk could get a taste of what he wanted, and maybe he would leave me in peace.
"The Director was reluctant to allow him to go with me, feeling Sammy Skunk wasn't psychologically prepared to go out among human society. I gave him some simple verbal warnings which I thought would be enough to prepare him to deal with the humans at the furry convention. But when we got there and the humans there were so happy to meet with real animal-people, Sammy Skunk was emotionally overwhelmed, more than I anticipated. I hadn't factored in how the hero worship Sammy Skunk was receiving would go to his head.
"I saw him dance intimately with Jim when we did the couples dance." I broke off at Jack's surprised expression and smiled sardonically. "Oh, you weren't aware that they did that?" But suddenly a wave of discomfort washed over me. "But who am I to talk of unawareness? It was a danger sign, and I ignored it. I should have grabbed Sammy Skunk and taken him back to base right away. But I was too busy having fun myself.
"I still had one last chance to avoid disaster, and I missed that. After all the dancing we did, I was utterly exhausted, and I assumed Sammy Skunk was too, and I let myself be carried into the enclosure reserved for us for relaxation. I blindly assumed Sammy Skunk was being brought in too, and I didn't think to make sure. And of course, guess who found him but Jim. So how do you think I feel? Ashamed of myself for failing to keep an eye on Sammy Skunk and allowing him to be completely taken advantage of in a moment of weakness!"
"But he consented!" Jack shot back defensively. "He wanted to have sex with us! We didn't get him drunk or anything! I did touch his genitals when we were hugging him, but I swear I wasn't deliberately hitting up on him! The last thing I expected him to do was to say he wanted to stroke him off! What were we supposed to have done when he said that?"
"Refused!" I almost shouted. "If you had had any decency, you would have said no!"
Jack suddenly calmed down, and it was his turn to look at me sardonically. "If I get the idea correctly," he said evenly, "you animal-people at PERC are supposed to be a handpicked team of professional scientific researchers, aren't you?"
I began to reply, but bit it off as a wave of embarrassment washed over me. "Yes, you're right," I sullenly admitted after a pause. "Sammy Skunk was not underage or incompetent. It was his own fault for acting irresponsibly, and my fault for thinking he was psychologically prepared to go out among human society when clearly he wasn't."
Jack paused before he responded. "You say he was psychologically unprepared. But we didn't talk him into having sex with us. We never even brought the subject up to him! All that happened was that I touched his genitals-and I swear it was an accident-and then he wanted us to stroke him off. I'm not lying, Sammy Skunk initiated the whole thing! You can check all the testimony we all gave if you don't believe me!"
"I do believe you, and I know it was as you said," I replied. "But did it never occur to you that Sammy Skunk might not have been in his right mind when he asked to have sex with you?"
"He wasn't acting goofy or anything, not that I could see!" Jack replied defensively. "He was happy, but I didn't get the impression he was drunk or anything. Besides, we were all consenting adults!"
I smiled sardonically. "You may have all been consenting adults, but Sammy Skunk was a space alien. You really thought that that wouldn't have mattered?"
"But you animal-people were allowed to go out among us humans in the first place!"
"Under a tight leash! "We couldn't just go anywhere we wanted, we had to clear all our travels with the Earth authorities! And did you honestly think we were allowed to have sex with you humans? There was the danger that we could give you some exotic disease, or you us! Your little orgy threw the Earth authorities into a panic! At least some of them thought we were deliberately trying to infect the Earthians with some sort of sexually-transmitted virus!"
"One animal-person having sex with ten gay humans is going to destroy humanity?"
"The fuss may sound ridiculous now, but it didn't then. The Earth authorities understandably had a very hard time believing a space alien from an elite scientific research team could possibly let a bunch of humans screw him simply because he was drunk with being hero-worshiped."
Jack was silent for some moments before he replied. "But if you say he was drunk with being hero-worshiped when we first had sex with him...why is Sammy Skunk doing it now? He still has sex parties with Jim and other human furries, from what I heard!"
"Yes, this is true," I admitted. "But even if we assume Sammy Skunk was a repressed homosexual all along, I would never have expected Sammy Skunk to have fallen in love with, or had any sexual attraction for, you humans. I have friends among humans but I don't have any sexual attraction to them, whether male or female. Which is why I never would have anticipated Sammy Skunk wanting to have had sex with you."
"Well, I guess he was just different."
"Or, more likely, it's not that Sammy Skunk lusted after you, but he knew you lusted after him. You may not have told him anything, but I'm sure he was well aware of how you felt."
"But how could he if-" Jack looked at me strangely. "Can you animal-people read minds or something?"
"No, no," I replied, realizing his question was serious. "We animal-people may well sense things you humans cannot, though I cannot say for sure, not knowing how it is to be a human. But no, we cannot read minds, and if I were able to, I would have taken Sammy Skunk out of the furry convention before this whole mess would have occurred."
"Okay," said Jack, "so somehow he knew our secret desires. But why would he have sex with us if he weren't sexually attracted to us? That doesn't make sense!"
I smiled sardonically at him. "Oh, but it does. Remember that he said that he didn't care that you were humans or that you were males? And why was that the case? Because you were all happily playing with his penis and eagerly licking up his cum. He was already drunk with his new found celebrity status, and the idea that he was the source of your sexual pleasure must have really pushed him over the edge, especially as he was isolated from everything and everyone familiar to him. He was willing to do absolutely anything to make you happy!"
"But he was the one who told us what to do! He gave us the commands!"
"Because he knew that was what you wanted!"
"And he didn't want to do it? Then why did he emigrate to Earth? Why is he living with Jim? And why is he still having sex with Jim and other male humans? Is he being forced to?" Then his tone became tinged with worry. "Is he?"
My answer was much softer in tone. "This has been something I'd been wondering about myself. Yes, he came to Earth to stay. Yes, he has said that it was because he formed such a strong emotional bond with Jim, and I believe him. And yes, he has said he enjoys having sex with human males.
"But the bad part was that none of you bothered to figure out that Sammy Skunk was a space alien in an unfamiliar world and that what you did wasn't just your own matter. You involved other people as well. I was involved, Frank was involved, my research center was involved, and the Earth authorities were involved. You put a lot of people through hell because of what you've done, including me.
"No, I didn't get vivisected alive. Even the punishment I got from my employers was shockingly light, which involved only a reduction in salary and grade. But I suffered the most terrifying and degrading experience of my life. I was bundled and taken to a distant laboratory and got poked and examined like I was a lab specimen. I was forced to masturbate in front of a hostile audience. I got interrogated several times, and eventually I was cleared and sent back to my laboratory, where I was interrogated again. Eventually I was given my light punishment and allowed to resume my old position, but what I went through I wouldn't wish upon my worst enemy."
Jack looked at me with tears dripping from his eyes. "I'm sorry..." he choked out, "I never would have dreamed it would ever have come to this..."
"It could have been a lot worse," I went on. "We space aliens have no civil rights on Earth. If the Earth authorities chose to, they can do absolutely anything they want with us. My fear of being vivisected alive was no exaggeration. I couldn't believe that I have gotten off so lightly as I did."
Jack fell from his seat to his knees, crying harder now. "I'm so sorry, I'm really really sorry..."
I stood up and squatted down, and he reacted with a jerk when I put my hands lightly upon him. Jack gave me an intense look.
"I'm sorry I was so harsh," I told him soothingly, "but I felt it important to let you know exactly how serious the consequences were of what you and your friends had done with Sammy Skunk were. They could have been far worse. But I realize that your crime was stupidity and not malice. And in any case, you weren't the only ones guilty of stupidity."
"Don't be too hard on yourself," replied Jack.
"I didn't mean just myself," I said sardonically. "I'm referring to the other party that was negligent."
"Who?" Jack asked, looking confused.
"The people handling security at the furry convention. Remember what I said about us animal-people being held on a tight leash when we first came to Earth? When we came to the furry convention, we had to go through tight security before we reached the convention room. But you and your friends were able to walk right out the front entrance with Sammy Skunk! And I was able to walk out the front entrance with Frank! The idiot door guard didn't even look up at us! And it's not as we animal-people could be mistaken for humans in fur suits! Not only did I have such a hard time believing this, but both my interrogator at the laboratory and my Director at my research center thought I was lying to them! I suppose the people at the convention center would assume that members of a space alien research team would behave responsibly, but even so..."
Jack responded with a snort, then rose and returned to his seat, no longer weeping.
"And if you don't mind my asking," I went on, what happened to you after we left with Sammy Skunk?"
Jack was rather reluctant to reply. "We all knew there was going to be trouble, but we didn't know what. I thought, was what we did really so terrible when everyone consented, and Sammy Skunk told us he didn't regret what he had done afterward? There was really nothing for us to do but go home, so I did. Fortunately, my roommate was out at the time, and we don't usually ask each other where the other one goes. He knows I'm a furry of course, and probably knows I go out and have sex wearing fur suits, but I'm sure he never found out about my having anything to do with Sammy Skunk.
"So I waited for what seemed like forever before two people in suits who identified themselves as Earth authorities came for me, and I went with them on a long trip to some building-probably the same one you were at. They put me in a room and had me take off all my clothes. They examined me and stuck probes into me, and had me masturbate, which wasn't easy to do when I was already spent, and then they gave me blood tests and other tests, there were so many I lost track. Then they interrogated me several times, and after a day they took me back home, telling me that I was lucky not to be infested with some horrible alien disease."
"That was a genuine fear on their part," I responded. "The Earth authorities did check us for all sorts of diseases when we first came to this planet, but I suppose something they didn't find could always slip through. Since sex is a major way of spreading virulent diseases, that was why we were supposed to avoid having sex with humans. And when Sammy Skunk violated that rule..."
"I know it sounds silly, but I never knew about these rules, or how important they were," Jack said ruefully. "I thought that when Sammy Skunk wanted to have sex with us, it was just, well..."
"Your fantasy come true, I know. Yes, I have, along with my colleagues, seen a lot of Earthian furry fiction about how some lucky human manages to score with one of us animal-people, and we found it ridiculous. I have often found myself depicted as having homosexual proclivities and secretly desiring to have sex with humans. Since I have no such proclivities, I thought it would never really happen that any of us animal-people would ever be having sex with any humans, let alone gay furries. I never dreamed it would ever really occur."
"Well maybe, as you said, Sammy Skunk simply had secret homosexual feelings and they didn't come out until he met us," Jack replied. "I can't believe he had sex with us just because we wanted it!"
I smiled sardonically. "You think that is out of the question? There is plenty of evidence to suggest that under the right circumstances, people do things that they would otherwise not dream of doing. Take military basic training, on both my world and this one. You're taught to obey orders without complaint. You're taught to wake up any time of day or night and do things right away. You're taught to endure physical hardships and ignore them. Ask anyone who's been in the military-any military anywhere in existence. I've been in the military myself, so I know firsthand.
"As for Sammy Skunk, he must have suspected you might be a group of gay furries, even if you never indicated it to him, and when you touched his genitals it certainly would have confirmed it. But what could possibly have motivated him to want to have sex with you, you ask? First, he had clearly formed an emotional bond with Jim, probably when they happened to dance together at the convention. We animal-people do that, even though it doesn't necessarily lead to becoming lovers. Second, he was young enough to be tempted to perform sexual experimentation. He couldn't do it among his own kind, but he figured he could safely do it with you, away from the eyes of PERC. Perhaps he was also tempted simply by doing something naughty out of the sight of his PERC colleagues and getting away with it."
Jack paused before he replied, "You say that Jack and Sammy Skunk 'bonded'. I'm not sure what you mean like that."
"Well, I'm not sure if there is a human equivalent or not, but it's a matter of liking someone very much and enjoying being with them-but it's not quite the same as being romantic lovers. I admit I've become so bonded with several humans-and Frank, yes, the Frank who was Jim's friend, is the first human I have done so with. Why? Probably because he came and helped me in my hour of despair when I had lost track of Sammy Skunk, and he had gone out of his way to help me find him, even though he was too late."
Jack looked at me with renewed guilt, so I quickly added, "Listen, I realize that at the time you didn't really comprehend who we animal-people are. But you were hardly the only ones. Even the Earth authorities had naively assumed that just because we were handpicked to go to this planet, we were great geniuses and that our every move was precisely calculated and we knew exactly what we were doing. Never mind all the blunders and embarrassing incidents that marked much of my first year of residence on Earth."
"How do you mean?" he asked.
"One example. On our world, men and women do not have segregated bathrooms. You can guess how I found out that that wasn't the case here."
"You go to the bathroom in front of each other?"
"Not quite. Each toilet is in its own individual stall with a door, and each toilet design is identical. Thus, no need to have different bathrooms."
"Ah, I never knew that."
I smiled. "I'm from a completely different world that has had no contact with your until recently, remember? Still, our worlds are roughly similar, and there's just as much a variety of nations and cultures on my world as on Earth."
Then I glanced toward the recording equipment, and I added, "Unfortunately, this is supposed to be a formal interview, and we must go on."
"Oh, sorry, um..."
"Don't be sorry. In fact I regret having to bring up what must be a painful subject, but...it seems that you have broken off with Jim and Sammy Skunk after the whole incident."
Jack looked quite miserable again. "Actually, they broke up with me."
"And why is that?" I asked, already suspecting the answer.
"Because-" Jack broke off, taking time to figure out how to answer. "Well, as I told you, Jim and I and the others were a club of furries who enjoyed having sex with each other in fur suits. I actually feel like a raccoon when I put my raccoon suit on. Well, not like one of you animal-people type raccoons, but..."
"I understand. Like a performer putting on the costume of a role he or she is supposed to play and then feeling like that character. I also know that the concept of anthropomorphic animals existed among humans in practically all cultures long before you learned of our existence. I wouldn't expect a human dressing up as an anthropomorphic red fox to feel like me. After all, I don't feel like a red fox-person as such. It's just who I am and how I always was. Species is a significant but not a major factor on our world." Then I added sullenly, "Unfortunately, we must return to the subject."
Jack looked unhappily at me, but I assume he sensed that I was no happier about bringing up the topic than he was, and it was some moments before he said, "Well, in short, I fell in love with Sammy Skunk. Yes, romantic love, not just someone I could share sex with. I wanted to have him live with me, to spend every night in bed with him, to kiss and cuddle with whenever I could. When Jim contacted us all again and gave us the news that Sammy Skunk was going to stay on Earth and become an Earth citizen, I was overjoyed. Not everyone in our old group came back to see him again, but I did. Jim had to leave his old apartment and found a place to stay temporarily, but we were all invited to celebrate Sammy Skunk's coming to Earth to stay by having another sex party-and we could do it all legally.
"That first time was wonderful. But after the next time or so..." Jack looked ready to cry. "I used to be satisfied with the casual sex with Jim and his friends. But things changed for me. I could have all the sex with Sammy Skunk that I wanted. But I realized, and so did they, that I wanted more. I wanted Sammy Skunk's heart. And he gave it to Jim."
Tears fell again from Jack's eyes. "Finally, what I feared would happen did happen. They both asked me to not see them again. So I didn't. I had nothing to do with them until that time when the thugs attacked Sammy and Jim. When I saw how miserable Sammy Skunk was, I was in a real dilemma. I really wanted to go and comfort him, but I was afraid Sammy Skunk might think of me as a vulture trying to take Jim's place. I finally sent Sammy Skunk a note of condolences, but I didn't hear back. I didn't really expect to, but to this day I wonder what his reaction was to what I had written. I'm not expecting to get reacquainted with them, and in fact I'm happy that Jim recovered and Sammy didn't lose his great love. But now, I have no love of my own. I'm even thinking I might end up joining a new fur suit sex club, because it's better than nothing."
Jack fell silent, and I felt sorry for him, and vaguely responsible because I was the one who had inadvertently brought Sammy Skunk into their lives. I went to the recording equipment and turned it off once more, before I walked over to Jack, knelt down, and put my hands sympathetically on his.
"I just turned off the recording equipment," I told Jack. "And you asked me earlier if I hated you. I shall admit that prior to this interview, I did have a small level of animosity toward you. But it has now disappeared. In fact, I gained a bit of respect for you."
Jack was dumbfounded. "Really?"
I smiled. "Because you weren't satisfied simply by having Sammy as a sex toy. You want love and affection and not just casual sex. If you weren't that way before, you are now."
Jack's reply was sullen. "I didn't choose to leave Sammy Skunk. He drove me away."
"Because he knew you didn't want just casual sex from him. I'm sorry, but it was Jim he had formed his great emotional bond with. Enough to cause him to leave his own world forever."
"What would have happened if you had taken Sammy out of the convention like you said you wished you did? Would it have been too late even then?"
I thought before I answered. "In all honesty, I don't know." I paused and added, "But I do know one other consequence of having let Sammy Skunk out of my sight. When he came into your lives, it ruined your happy little furry clique, and you lost your friends. And for that I'm sorry."
Jack gave me a rueful smile. "Actually, having sex with people in fur suits whom I barely knew, enjoyable though it was, was not enough anymore. I've been wanting my own true love, an emotional love, and though I've had a number of boyfriends it never came to that. I admit that when Sammy Skunk had fallen in love with Jim, I felt jealous. Why couldn't it have been me? Of course I'd take anyone who would love me back, and an open relationship would have been fine with me. I'd even be more than happy to make up with Jim and Sammy Skunk again, and if I had my own love I wouldn't be coveting Sammy Skunk for myself."
"Ignoring your love life for a moment, how do you now feel about the furry world?"
"I'm as much a part of it as I always was. I still enjoy putting on my fur suit and being an anthro raccoon. And no, my fur suit isn't just for having sex. In fact, it's designed so that I can even go to the bathroom without having to remove it."
"Really," I exclaimed, intrigued.
Jack perked up. "Want to take a look at it?"
I agreed, and we reentered Jack's bedroom. He brought the pieces of his raccoon costume out of a cabinet, giving them to me to examine as he described each one. The design was indeed quite clever, especially the groin area, as it allowed the seemingly impossible task of allowing the wearer to extrude his penis and open access to his anal hole when necessary, but could be closed back up without obvious seams showing. "Did you make it yourself?" I asked.
"Oh, no, no, no," Jack replied. "It cost a pretty penny, but I commissioned a well-known fur suit maker to do this. But I do repair and maintain the fur suit myself as needed." A look of irritation crossed Jack's face, and he added, "Which is fortunate, as the Earth authorities confiscated it when they took me for examination, and it was a week after I was released before I got it back, and it took a whole weekend to repair the damage they did to it."
Which made me realize how generous the Earth authorities had been to me when they had laundered and pressed my clothes before they were returned to me after my release from the laboratory. "So it's okay again?"
"Oh, yes," replied Jack. "I've worn it again, but I haven't gone out anywhere with it. But I plan to sometime."
"I was thinking of asking you if you wanted to wear it now, and we can go back into the living room and I turn the recording equipment back on, so your raccoon persona can be recorded for posterity."
Jack looked skeptical. "Uh, before we go on, what exactly are you going to do with these recordings?"
"They go to both the Earth authorities and to PERC for our perusal," I replied. "Is there a problem with that?"
"Well, it so happens that whatever you animal-people think, I happen to be very proud of my raccoon suit and I have sacrificed a great deal of time and money toward it."
"Ah, I understand," I told him. "You're worried that I'm going to record you in your raccoon costume and my colleagues are going to laugh at it because you wouldn't resemble an actual raccoon-person from our world." I paused and added, "Let me assure you that that is not my intention at all. First of all, as you said, we're a handpicked professional research team. We didn't get sent at great difficulty and expense to your world to laugh at it. Second, I understand, and so would my colleagues, that your raccoon character is not meant to be an accurate depiction of one of our raccoon-people, any more than Mickey Mouse is meant to be an accurate depiction of an ordinary mouse."
Jack was surprised. "You have fur suits on your own world too?"
"Of course! We have costumes meant for entertainment or advertising, not intended to be realistic. You have caricatures of various people, we have them too. As for animal-people of one species trying to realistically impersonate another, though, that is quite difficult for us. We have a big variety in size, shape, coloring, fur texture, or lack of fur, and so forth. I couldn't possibly mimic a realistic raccoon-person any more than you can. You humans have it easy in that you aren't too drastically different from each other, if you ignore height, weight, and the like, so you could make yourself look like a number of different types of humans with relatively few changes. You can imagine how difficult it is on our world for our entertainment industry."
"I never realized that."
"Now you know. Going back to the topic of your raccoon outfit, I can ask you to wear it and show it off so I can record it, but I cannot compel you to. I had assumed you would have been happy to do so, but understandably you fear we might mock your costume that you show such devotion to. But let me assure you that we understand that when humans wear animal costumes, the idea isn't necessarily that you're trying to be like us. I know that animal costumes have been a part of human civilization since the beginning, and I'm sure you know of ancient civilizations and primitive cultures that have people wearing costumes representing various animals for ritualistic reasons."
"Oh yes."
"So you don't have to worry about me or my colleagues laughing at your raccoon costume, because we won't. We know your raccoon persona is, well, your raccoon persona. If you don't want to have me record you in it, I won't, but I hoped you would. After all, that is how I first met you. And costume-wise, I admit I like the fact that you gave it a realistic rather than a cartoony look like I see on most other animal costumes."
Jack looked surprised. "You really like my costume? You're not just buttering me up?"
"'Buttering you up' means giving you insincere praise, right?" I asked. "I still don't know a lot of English-language slang."
"Oh, duh, I forgot you're from another world and English doesn't exist there. Yes, that's what it means."
"Ah. I am not 'buttering you up', as you asked. I do like your costume, or I would not have bothered to ask to record you in it."
"Say, I always wondered...how do you happen to know the English language as well as you do?"
I smiled. "I happen to have a natural affinity to learn foreign languages. It's one factor that qualified me to go to this planet. And no, I don't have any implants, and there's still no good computer program that can translate one language to another and back. And I learned it initially from the information that earlier explorers to this world had brought back with them, and interacting with humans has filled in the rest."
Jack smiled back. "So you just learned English the good old-fashioned way?"
"There's no such thing as a Babel fish. And yes, I've read the Douglas Adams novels."
"What did you think of them?"
"Somewhat funny, but I think you have to be an Earthian to truly enjoy them."
"So shall I go ahead and put my raccoon suit on?"
"Oh, yes please. I give you my word that I don't intend to hold it up to ridicule."
With this encouragement, Jack started taking his clothes off-then realized I was still there. I made my apologies and turned to leave his bedroom.
"It won't bother me if you see me undress," Jack told me. "In fact, I thought you wanted to see how I transformed."
So I agreed and watched him take off all his clothes, even his underpants, before he started putting on the leggings of his raccoon costume. "You just wear your raccoon suit over your bare skin?" I asked in surprise. "No undergarments of any sort?"
"That way I don't have to remove it if I have to use the bathroom, or else-well, I also feel more like the fur suit is actually part of me."
"Maintaining that costume must be quite a nuisance."
"It's worth it, to me anyway. And it's cheaper than, say, a sports car."
I smiled. "I suppose. But if you go to the bathroom in it and have sex in it, I can hardly imagine you'd be able to go out in mixed company in it."
"I wash it very thoroughly after every wearing, so there's no odors or anything when I put it on again. And I showed you the system of flaps, so there's no danger of my genitals being accidentally exposed. I can assure you that as long as my fur suit is sealed, it's family safe."
I let him finish putting his costume all the way on, then I asked to look at it more closely. He was not kidding about the crotch flaps, and it was only upon close inspection that I was able to tell they were there. He offered to demonstrate their function, but I declined, asking him to return to the living room.
I turned on the recording once more and had Jack display himself in his raccoon suit, and he demonstrated walking around and moving in different ways that I never would have thought possible for him to do inside it. Even those who would normally ridicule fur suits would have been impressed how well designed this one was. After the show was over, I formally closed the interview and turned the recording equipment off. As I began to pack it up, I saw Jack remove the head of his raccoon outfit, and he looked rather sadly at me.
"You're leaving?" he asked.
"Well, the interview is over and I have to get back to base," I replied. "Thank you for your time."
"Listen," Jack pleaded. "I was hoping to have you around a little longer."
I smiled sardonically. "I'm afraid I'm even less suited to be your paramour than Sammy Skunk is."
"I don't mean that. Could we...is it all right if I ask you for a hug?"
"You want to hug me?" I asked, spreading my arms. "Certainly!"
Jack practically collided with me as he embraced me tightly, and I hugged him back. His still-covered hands stroked my back, and I wondered if he was going to go beneath my waist like he had done with Sammy Skunk. I maintained my embrace as he rubbed my back some more, and I was mentally daring him to grope for my genitals. But I realized he was not going to, though he kept rubbing my back. I finally took my arms off him, but he kept leaning on me and hugging me until I pushed him away.
"It was nice having you in my arms," I told him, "but I cannot stay with you all day. I have a base to get back to, work to do, underlings to keep on their toes, the Director to grovel to, that sort of thing. I'm sorry that your love for Sammy Skunk has gone unrequited, and contact with him is out, but there's nothing I can do about it. I hope that somehow you will be cured of your loneliness, and while I disliked you when I first came to visit, I no longer feel that way. I do feel sympathy toward you, even though you had previously caused me trouble."
"Can I ask one more favor of you?"
"Depends what it is."
Jack looked at me pleadingly. "I realize that Jim and Sammy Skunk don't want to have anything to do with me. But even so I was worried for them when they were attacked by the thugs. I wanted to bring comfort to Sammy Skunk when he was worried for Jim but I was afraid to. I want to tell them that I'm happy that Jim recovered and they have found happiness together and love each other. I can't do it myself...but can I ask you to do it?"
This request was not entirely unexpected, dear reader, and while I did not normally do this sort of thing, I was involved in causing this situation and was happy to tie up any loose ends.
"Yes, I can do that," I replied. "Why don't you write me a note with your message and I can deliver it sometime? Then I can bring back their answer later on."
So I directed him to hand write a note, with me suggesting the way to word it, and I took it in an envelope, and packed up my things and stepped out of Jack's apartment. Then I saw the note that Jack had written to his roommate taped to the outside of the door, and pointed it out to him. Jack took it down and asked if I had wanted it for a souvenir. I was actually thinking of that, and said yes, for I liked how Jack had euphemistically described me. So I took that note with me along with everything else.
I went down the steps and exited the building, returning to my car. I quickly packed everything in and got in, and as I was driving out of the parking lot, another car appeared on the road behind me. Once I was going down the street, the other car turned into the parking lot's entrance. Was it Jack's roommate? If so, I was hoping that Jack was changing out of his raccoon costume and back into regular clothes. I was not certain whether or not the roommate had consented to my interview with Jack at their residence, so I was glad to be away then.
I proceeded immediately to the apartment where Sammy Skunk and his lover Jim had lived. Though it was a surprise visit, they showed no objection, probably assuming I needed to use the bathroom or something. They were quite surprised, though, when I told them about my visit with Jack and the note from him.
"The reason we broke off with him," Sammy said rather defensively, "isn't that we have anything against him, but that he wanted me to love him and that I could never do. It would have become a bad situation. We really didn't want to hurt him, but he had to go, for all our sakes."
"I know that, and Jack knew that too," I replied. "He told me he sent you a sympathy note when you were in the hospital waiting for Jim to recover. You didn't reply. Or has Jack not told me the whole story? Has he been harassing you or anything?"
"No, no," said Sammy, and Jim echoed the reply. "I was so upset at the time I didn't even acknowledge the sympathy notes. I admit that after the fact, I was surprised and pleased that so many humans had given me their support."
"You're an animal-person," I replied. "Humans viewed you as if you were an extremely loyal pet. Which arguably is the case."
"All right, so I am," confessed Sammy. "No worse than you and Frank."
"I may have bonded with him, but I am not his lover," I shot back, "and I'm not prepared to stay on Earth for the rest of my life because of any of my human friends, however close I may be to them. In any case, if Jack hasn't been bothering you, at least give him credit for that. I'm sure he isn't trying to get reacquainted with you, he knows it's impossible."
"You seem rather well-disposed to Jack," piped in Jim.
"I haven't bonded with him, if that's what you're implying," I retorted.
"No, no," Jim replied. "I wasn't expecting you to, well, you seem to be advocating for him in a way."
"Well," I admitted, "before Sammy Skunk and I came upon the scene, you had a happy little clique. Now Jack has been expelled from that. He would have been better off if you and Sammy Skunk had never met!"
"Jack gave us no choice!" Jim said defensively. "We didn't just throw him out! We did what we did before, only with Sammy Skunk in the mix. Everything would have been fine, except Sammy Skunk loved me, and Jack clearly wanted Sammy's love for himself. We tried to overlook that, but eventually...well, it became an untenable situation. I wished it didn't come to that, but it did, so what else could we do?"
"I'm no happier about Jack leaving us than he is!" Sammy added. "I feel sorry for him too! If he found someone else to love, well..."
"Yes, we would even be willing to invite him back to our group," Jack finished. "But please, we don't want to tell him that right now, in case he gets the wrong idea. If he wants love, he'll have to find it from someone other than us."
"Well," I replied, "I'll tell him...actually, I think you'll have to write him a reply. So he won't think I'm just telling him what he wants to hear."
"What exactly should we tell him?" asked Jim.
I looked at my watch. "I will have to return to PERC base now," I told them. "But I shall return tomorrow if I can, for I don't want Jack to be kept waiting on this matter for too long."
I returned to PERC base, and when I told the Director what I had done he was not pleased.
"You were supposed to have just interviewed this person," he complained, "not get involved with his personal life."
"But I got involved with his personal life as a result of the furry convention mess," I replied.
"That didn't mean you agree to be his personal messenger," the Director shot back. "Call him and tell him that what he and his fellow Earthians do is his own business and you weren't supposed to have gotten involved in it."
"He agreed to talk to me," I said. "I didn't promise him anything in return beforehand. But I helped cause this mess in the first place, and for the sake of decency I need to do what I can to clean it up!"
"Decency isn't your job," replied the Director sardonically. "Your duty is to observe human society, not get involved in it!"
I laughed in response. "You ever heard the old saying that there is no such thing as the invisible eyeball? (A saying on our world, dear reader.) Once we came to visit this world, we became a part of it. We're involved with human affairs just by our presence. And remember those months I had to be with Sammy Skunk while Jim was recuperating from his brain damage?"
"That was different. The Earth authorities essentially shut us down during that time."
"But remember how afterward the Earthians became much more amenable to us? In any case, it will look bad if I make a promise and renege on it, even if the people involved didn't necessarily do me well..."
"All right, I'll give you the whole day tomorrow to get this business done, if that's enough."
"More than enough," I replied. "And thanks. I don't intend to make it an all-day outing if I can help it."
So then I called Sammy and arranged to meet with him the next day, which fortunately was a Saturday so he'd be home anyway, and then I called Jack to set a time. Of course I had to tell my assistants about my unscheduled trip the next day, so we worked into the evening on data processing so they could legitimately loaf the next day as I knew they would.
Saturday came and I visited Jim and Sammy Skunk, and after some brainstorming decided on the best message to give to Jack. I then stopped at a restaurant for lunch, not wanting to keep Jack waiting, but deciding it ideal to not see him before the arranged time.
When I arrived at Jack's apartment, his roommate was there, but in his own bedroom with the door closed so I never saw him. Jack led me to his own room, and spoke quietly and moved furtively, as if the discovery of my presence might cause trouble. He relaxed once we were safely in his room and he closed the door, and then acted and talked normally. Evidently the agreement was that their bedrooms were their own spaces to be left alone by the other.
As soon as I could, I gave Jack the note, and he was anxious as he opened it. Then he read the words:
"When Jim was nearly killed by the thugs and I was waiting for what seemed literally like an eternity for him to recover, I was suffering indescribable emotional pain and it was difficult for me to pay attention to the outside world. I did receive a surprising number of notes of sympathy from humans around the world, and you had written one too, but I did not pay close attention to them until Jim had recovered to the point when I knew he would be fine. I realized you had written me too but I was unsure how to react. It is well you have written me now and I am now certain you were genuinely concerned for both our well-being. I do appreciate this because my love goes out to Jim and nobody can replace him. I also know you wish for your own true love and I hope you get one for yourself. Sammy Skunk.
I confess that I was originally uncertain about you as well, but now I am convinced you wish well for us both and not just want Sammy Skunk for yourself as I originally feared. I wish the best for him and would support him in any life choice he makes, but he is clearly devoted to me emotionally even though we have other sex partners. I can understand you want your own true love as well, but it can be neither of us. But like Sammy Skunk, I myself hope you will find one as well. Jim."
Both portions were in their authors' respective handwriting. Jack looked toward me and I smiled and said, "Rest assured I am completely inept at forging handwriting."
"Thank you," Jack said breathlessly. "Ah, if I only could find a true love..."
"That's not a problem restricted to human furries," I replied sardonically.
"I know. Not only that, but...I wish I could go back to them."
"If you could without the love triangle business starting all over again."
"I know. Damn it!"
"Well, I did all I possibly could," I told him. "Everything else is up to you from here on in."
"I understand."
"Then I guess I'd better be off."
"Wait!" Jack pleaded. "You did so much for me already. But one last thing..."
"No more message deliveries, please."
"Not that. I..."
And abruptly he threw his arms around me and hugged me tightly, pressing his cheek against the top of my head. I let him hold me like this for a while, but I could not have him do it all day.
"Do you feel any better?" I finally asked him.
Jack reluctantly withdrew from me. "Yes," he replied. "I just, well, your fur feels so wonderful..."
I gave him a reassuring smile. "I understand. A lot of humans like the feel of my fur."
"I wish I could feel it every day."
"I'm afraid that that's out of the question." I paused and added, "If you like the feel of fluffy fur, why not get a pet dog or cat or something?"
"My roommate's allergic to them, or so he says."
"Did he have any adverse reactions after I came to visit?"
"Not as far as I could tell. But then, you're actually an animal-person, which means you don't lick yourself clean or anything."
I smiled. "We use detergent and water like you humans. In any case, I assume your roommate won't care for my being here, so I'd better be gone so you won't get into trouble."
"Aw," Jack said in disappointment.
"Look," I told him, "maybe he won't care, but I don't want to take chances. If he didn't consent to my having a recorded interview with you in this apartment in the first place, and he finds out, we're talking a great deal of potential trouble, not only for you but for me and PERC, and I've already been through a lot of trouble already. For all our sakes, I need to be out of here as soon as possible."
So Jack opened the door, looked outside, and beckoned me outside. I saw the other bedroom door still closed, and Jack quickly crept to the entry door and opened it, and we both slipped outside. I made my way to the bottom of the steps to the entry hall, and was surprised to find Jack still accompanying me.
"I can find my way to my car myself, thank you," I told him.
"It's not that," Jack replied, "I..."
I faced him and put my hands on his shoulders and looked straight at him. "Please don't get any wrong ideas," I told him. "When I first came to see you, I dreaded the prospect and felt a degree of hostility toward you. Admittedly, I no longer do so, in large part because you wanted Sammy Skunk as a genuine lover and not merely a casual sex partner, and you couldn't get him to love you. For that, I feel sympathy toward you. That's why I went through the bother of having you write the note to Jim and Sammy Skunk and my personally delivering it there and back to you. I didn't have to, but I chose to. I knew you also wanted to enjoy the feel of my fur so I let you do that.
"But please don't get the idea that I'm doing all this out of friendship. I'm actually trying to clean up the mess I helped cause by letting Sammy Skunk out of my sight at the furry convention, as best I can. I'm sure you'd love to have an animal-person as a friend, if you can't have him as a lover. The trouble is, there's a long list of people who want me as a friend too. I can't be friends with everybody, and those humans I have befriended I rarely have an opportunity to visit.
"So I do hope you find somebody to love. It can't be Sammy Skunk, and it won't be me, and I cannot say that any more animal-people will come to Earth to stay. I do hope the future will be better for you. And that's all I can do for you."
We said goodbyes, Jack looking near to tears, but I left as quickly as I could. I did contact Sammy Skunk and Jim to let them know how my note delivery went, and it was back to PERC to return to my life of busywork.