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Chapter one

Indigo slowed to a trot as his red brick apartment came into view through the skeletonized late fall trees. He wiped the sweat from his face with his sleeve, a little amazed how wet his extra-long, extra-baggy, work out shirt had become in the freezing early morning temps. When he reached the concrete apron of the front entry he deliberately collapsed face first on its frosty surface with only his hooves still on the withered grass. Then, despite the protests of his chilling hide, weary body, and frozen hands, he launched into push-ups until he collapsed again. His dappled gray horse face and white forelock once again dripping from his exertions. For the span of only a few breaths he rested. Then he rolled over and began stretching. "You have to stretch before and AFTER every workout!" He scolded his exhausted muscles with the mantra he heard from every football coach he ever had. So for the next twenty minutes he endured the cold and contorted himself into extreme positions for a slow count of thirty at each in obedience to his self-discipline.

Just as he was beginning to entertain thoughts of a hot shower and a warm bed, the door to the apartment building opened behind him.

"There. He. Is." A female voice announced chopping each word like it was a complete sentence. Although he knew the speaker from her voice, he half-turned his head anyway. A medium-brown furred rabbit with white tips, face, and neck peered down at him from behind round-framed eyeglasses and her ubiquitous book. A dusting of freckles on her cheekbones and nose seemed to match her fire-red hair that spilled down to her shoulders. She was wearing a sky-blue long sleeved blouse and matching dress that stopped short of her ankles. In deference to the weather, he could see woolen pink stockings that left her toes exposed and well worn sandals kept her paws off the frost covered concrete. "I haven't seen you for two weeks now. And we have had no classes this past week for Thanksgiving, but youuuu haven't gone back home." Janet's eyes were focused on her reading. Then they jumped up and fixed on Indigo's. " You are not going to convince me it's because of your night job at the airport, Indigo. You broke up with your latest girlfriend, didn't you?"

"Heh, what makes you think that?" Indigo asked nonchalantly, but looked away.

"Oh the usual," Janet sighed as she interpreted his deflection, "A radical change in your daily routine, greater interest in fitness, and avoidance of friends and family." Janet lowered and closed her book, holding her place with her thumb. "I have known you since middle school, remember? We lived on the same street. You have told me about every girlfriend and break-up you have had. I know you, Indigo. And I bet you have been in mourning for two weeks now?" Janet waited for confirmation and received a head nod. "That's long enough, for a guy." Janet brought her book up and started walking and reading. "I'm going to the café up the street. Why don't you join me?"

"I'm sweaty."

"They have outside seating and heating." Janet replied increasingly above conversation tones as she continued walking away with her eyes never leaving the page. "Just put on something dry and come over. I won't let you sleep if you don't!"

Indigo watched Janet walk with her nose in her book for a moment. Ever since beginning high school she walked nearly everywhere, and always simultaneously reading a book. He'd never seen her without one, nor had he seen her ever stray off a sidewalk or into a tree, object, or other people. It was like she could see through her reading material or, navigated via some sixth sense.

He shook his head and got to his feet. He had better meet her at that café for breakfast or he would indeed get no rest until he spilled his guts to her again. In his bedroom, he supposed he should feel grateful, as he stripped out of his damp workout clothes and tossed them into an empty clothes basket. If she wasn't so observant he might be slipping into a depression now that his laundry was done and fourth floor studio apartment was clean and dust free for the first time this year. With nothing else constructive to do, and all his friends out for the holiday, he might just start to wallow in useless self pity. After all, it was the season. So despite his need for sleep, he pulled on yesterday's warm sweatshirt and jeans but, no underwear. He had to shower afterward anyway.

Fifteen minutes later he was walking up to Janet's outside table. She was sitting relaxed back in her chair against the building with her book resting on the table's edge. Her overhead heater was the only one on and created a river of warmth with the slight morning breeze. At his approach she folded her book over her left thumb and smiled at him.

"Glad you could make it." Janet greeted him before sipping from a glass of orange liquid.

"What's that?" Indigo asked as he sat down in the plastic chair across from her.

"Carrot juice."

"Carrot juice!?" Indigo feigned disgust and leaned back in his chair to match her posture. "I guess some rabbit stereotypes are accurate."

"Oh, don't worry," Janet said without hesitation and leaned forward to set down her glass and pat Indigo's hand. "I ordered for you so you won't have to think up small talk much longer."

Indigo, taken aback and slightly slack-jawed at her quick retort, had locked eyes with Janet, who was smiling the smile of the 'cat that ate the canary'. He believed he could hear her unspoken challenge. 'Go ahead, I dare you. You can't defeat me in this arena and you never will!' True to Janet's word, the waitress arrived and deposited a plate in front of both of them.

"Coffee, sir?" The waitress interrupted their silent dialog.

"Yes, thank you." Indigo replied, grateful for the face-saving change of subject.

"Thank you, Candice. Everything looks wonderful." Janet said after she had filled Indigo's cup, dismissing her.

Indigo waited till she was out of earshot. "What makes you think I wanted the protein plate?" he challenged Janet, not yet willing to drop the verbal sparring.

"Janet swallowed her tiny bite of bagel and cream cheese. "You need protein to rebuild your muscles after your workout. I imagine you haven't had anything but carbs stashed in your room so, I figured this is what you need."

"Are you my nutritionist now?"

"Indigo please," Janet sighed, and opened her book "everything I know about nutrition I learned from you, and you learned it from your coach and told it to me. So obey your coach and eat."

"But, I..."

"Eat now!" Janet cut him off. "It will get cold quickly out here. We will talk when you finish. And don't worry, Indigo. I checked to make sure that pig on your plate wasn't one of your guy friends."

Dumbfounded again, Indigo sat with a half-formed reply in his mouth for a moment before acknowledging defeat. If the score had only been tied before, she secured the win with her last comment. And to be honest with himself, he had nothing clever to say.

He didn't realize how hungry he was until his first bite of ham. Then he became ravenous, like a starving wolf over a kill. The only time he looked up from his plate was to see if there was any food left on the table. Janet had finished her bagel and juice, and now sat looking at him expectantly with her book closed between them.

"Are you finished eating?"

"I think I am. Is this plate edible?"

"No," Janet smiled, "do you want something more?"

"No."

"Good. Then down to business."

"Oh? Is this a business brunch?"

Janet sighed, a little exasperated. "I know this is hard for you, so let me help you start: Who called off the relationship?" It was as difficult as it always was for him to talk about his relationships, but as he began answering her simple queries his story became a torrent. He told Janet everything as she sat and listened without condemnation or judgment. "So you broke it off with your last four girlfriends because you wanted to have a deeper relationship with them but, you didn't feel there was enough of a connection?" Janet summarized after he had finished.

Indigo nodded. "It just seemed we weren't at the same level intellectually." Janet's lips tightened into a line and she dropped eye contact. After which she swallowed and cleared her throat. Indigo knew this was her way of concealing an inappropriate laugh. "You're laughing at me." Indigo accused her.

"I am not."

"You do that to hide it but, I know you laughed. I know you Janet." Indigo asserted with Janet's inflection.

"I tried to be subtle so you would not think that I was laughing at you." Janet's said unperturbed. "I'll laugh at you to your face. I don't hide."

"If not at me, then why did you laugh?" Janet did not answer him but, her green eyes were locked on him with an intensity that he found unsettling. "What made you laugh then?" Indigo asked, pursuing his line of questioning while meeting her stare. "Janet?"

"It's not germane. It doesn't matter." Janet responded with her eyes still piercing, still searching Indigo. "What does matter is how much you are trying to avoid talking. You're chasing sidetracks and attempting distraction." Janet's eyes softened and her voice became a whisper. "It's not this breakup that has you hiding. What's really bothering you, Indigo?"

Indigo slumped back in his chair in amazed at her ability to read him and yet still sullen.

Janet's left hand went up to the base of her ear. Indigo found he was too tired and morose to even puzzle over her action; instead he was grateful for the respite. Her hand remained up till their waitress arrived a few moments later. Immediately she began clearing the table of the empty dishes.

"What else can I get for you this morning?"

"I would like another glass of juice and a carafe of water with lemon, but no ice. Also,"

Janet paused, to take a sideways glance at Indigo, "could you spare a thermos of coffee for him, please?"

"Sure, we can manage without one. I'll be right back."

"Thank you, Candice." Janet picked up her book and flipped to her marker "You have until she returns, and then we start again.

A crooked smile creased Indigo's cheek. His friend was into what he considered her 'interrogator' mode. He imagined her in a military uniform threatening him with a German accent: 'You have until zhe returnz unden ve vill shtart again!'

"So, do you have a signal worked out with every waitress?"

"No." Janet answered without looking up. "I spent some time finding a café I liked enough to frequent but, also had a server experienced enough to work with me. Candice tells me the days she'll be here; I tell her the days I'll visit. She makes certain my table is clear and warm," Janet gestured to the overhead gas heater, "and I tip her well. The hand signals are my way of telling her when I want something. Otherwise, she leaves me alone. A win-win situation. I'm left alone to read and she doesn't have to hover, she just looks outside periodically for my hand."

For a moment, Indigo forgot his troubles. The day seemed perfect despite the cold. A good workout, a great breakfast, and now time spent with wonderful caring friend who refused to let him be... Alone. He was actually smiling when Candice returned with their beverages. He thanked her and sipped at his coffee immersed in the warmth it sped to his body. Finished with that cup, he at once began pouring another.

"So," Janet spoke suddenly, jarring Indigo out of his peaceful reverie. "You were about to tell me what was really bothering you."

Indigo's smile faded as his recent problems reinvaded his mind. "We lost our last game."

"So? Your team has lost games before, and you didn't make any errors to cause the loss."

"Yes, but, I was out-played at every turn. I didn't make a single big play."

"But, you are only a junior, wait till next year. I bet you'll be the star then."

"I'm not a freshman either. I'm just not good enough."

"You're not good enough, for what?"

Indigo sighed, a heavy feeling pressing the air out of him. "I guess I finally realized I can't turn pro." Janet sat in silence. It seemed to him she was no longer enjoying their conversation in a vicarious manner, acting the interrogator no longer. "So, that's it, I guess." He finished with a shug.

"But, you're very good. You always have been."

"I'm not good enough. Football has, and will, pay for my degree, but it ends after my senior year."

"So, you..." Janet paused, "can't realize your dream to play football as a career and that has depressed you."

"There's more to it than that." Indigo said defensively, feeling now like that revelation was too petty for his recent behavior. "I don't know what else to do. My major is in business just because I needed to take classes to play, not because I had any real interest. Now I've realized I need to find a career and I'm... Lost."

"Oh." Janet exhaled, "I have to admit." Janet spoke with the care of someone who must watch their every word, "that I thought you just needed to talk to gain some perspective and... maybe have me kick you in the butt to get you out of your funk. I never expected you to be... suffering... with real issues. I'm sorry."

"Its okay, you have helped me."

"No, I have listened to you. Now!" Janet's ears leaned forward with anticipation and she clapped her hands and rubbed them together with grin spreading eagerly on her lips. "Do you want my help?"