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~~SPELL OF PERCEPTION~~

This is a scifi, light drama. The story revolves around a dejected young college student and his involvement in a mutual love interest and an illegal drug/religious organization. It's not as dense as my "The Drones" series or "The Braying", but in the more simplified and accessible style like "Into the Rain".

Some additional notes: this takes place on an alien planet where several species of mammal evolved into bipedal creatures along with humans. This first part of "Spell of Perception" has no actual yiffiness in it, but lots of intimate cuddling/snuggling involving a gay, male couple. Part 2 would see it more developed into heavier romance, if I write it. It's basically a human on furry (polar bear) fantasy. I plan on making it more accessible to a broader audience (perhaps), and thus I won't go overboard on the drama or psychology or plot twists like ev'rything else I've done.

A good music soundtrack is important, as this story was written in conjunction with a particular soundtrack and I strongly suggest it, or the next best thing, be listen to whilst reading. This main music is "Fourth World vol. 1: Possible Musics" by Jon Hassel/Brian Eno. But as this is obscure and kinda hard to come by, a second is "Spiritchaser" by Dead Can Dance. Any Brian Eno, Dead Can Dance, Harold Budd, or any Native-American influenced music will do (Impressions, North Sound, etc.).

Sorry for the tedious intro, I just feel it's necessary. (I'd greatly appreciate being notified of any drastic mistakes and/or inconsistencies : [email protected])

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Section 1; Days 1, 2 and 3.

~^'^'^~*~^'^'^~ Day 1.

Clouds, which accumulated in the sky above the city, sped quickly to drain their waters, and then go elsewhere. Blown amongst the atmosphere by cold wind and pressured into precipitation, it would rain soon. Many of them would get wet, too, though some of them had known of the wet weather in advance and brought umbrellas, personal shelters.

The building below was secured and the occupants, students, were prepared to remain within for a few extra minutes, hoping the storm would blow over. The halls were cold and devoid of occupants; everyone was in their proper place for a bit longer before release. The day was dreary, and mostly everyone was subdued in their climate and not looking forward to driving home or to work in the rainfall.

Learning grammar and terms of formal writing, a particular class was almost concluded, and a few of the students were becoming restless. A short, thin human mammal sat at the front, slouching and staring at the fidgeting leg of the girl - a lioness - beside him. He wore dark grey dress clothes; the shoes on his feet were black, however. The fur on his cranium was the same as the lioness' in the next chair, a very light brown hue.

A thin build - almost but not quite ectomorphic - and certainly not frail, he was found to be quite attractive by most people, especially those of his own species. One entity in particular held a much stronger liking to his character then to that of his appearance. He was aware of this person's feelings, and knew that in this quiet environment there lingered a bit of grief that there could be no conversation. It did not concern the human, for other musings were in his head.

There cycled the reoccurring anxiety of his inability to continue with his education. The act of wishing and desiring the education system worked as it had a hundred years ago - when a poor creature such as him could afford the immense commitment such as medical school - did nothing for him but add to the frustration. Yet he continued with those stressful thoughts.

He wanted to pay more attention to the talking of the professor, however, and tried - mildly successfully - to keep his thoughts from straying into those of anger for his predicament. It was driving him crazy.

A bear stared at him, situated two rows behind. This ursine was stark white and fluffy, a bit of grey upon his cranium. He simply stared, not gazing in admiration or fantasy, but zoning out from reality. Though when he realized he was zoning and became conscious of his own state of serenity, he began thinking about the human. Here was the admirer, the one who harbored a liking to the human.

The two males had not spoken to each other often, yet the bear wanted to be more talkative with him, in whatever way was possible, at least much more than the broken salutations and greetings. There was nothing to indicate an extended friendship save for the fact that they both liked literature and similar, however.

With a final statement of what homework was due for next week, the instructor told them they could leave and to have a good day. Immediately, the human's goal was to achieve his residence quickly and to nap softly. Two students rushed quickly to exit first, their motions so fluid and identical they seemed twins or blurred images of a singular person.

The human wearing grey was fourth to leave the room, the bear was fifth and both moved down the cold hall not entirely in proximity. Bear was eager to make contact, possibly place a hand on his shoulder and ask a typical question, 'What's up', or 'how're ya feelin'?'

"Hey, Freddy." Spoke a female canine - Gloria - as she approached, the salutation being directed towards the human. Freddy was ready to raise a hand to wave a return greeting, but she averted her eyes to something immediately above and behind him, speaking enough words to distract him. "And, Ned." She concluded.

Freddy glanced behind himself and met the bear's gaze; both of their eyes' colorings were dark brown and nothing special about either pair. The bear tried to look pleasant, smiling to appear friendly. Freddy simply smiled and waved his hand in greeting, not speaking. Ned surmised Freddy had something heavily distracting his mind, or was tired from the early morning classes. And he was correct with both hypotheses.

"Are you going with me tomorrow?" Ned asked the girl, but she most likely would do so. She clarified her agenda, stating there would be no reason to be absent from their destination.

"Freddy," she spoke more loudly, for the human had gotten ahead of them a few yards, "you wanna come?"

The human stopped and turned, staring directly at her with an odd expression, could have been interest or irritation. Both the bear and girl reminded themselves of how much Freddy occasionally resembled someone who had been lobotomized, that sluggish walk and usage of mumbling when speaking.

"Where?" Freddy wondered, not raising his pitch in the traditional form of interrogative phrases, instead, lowering it, indicating he was suspicious.

"The Den." She explained, having moved quickly to gain him within inches, speaking softly. He knew exactly what it was and was not interested in taking drugs or watching people take them. He declined her offer and continued exiting the building with an enormous yawn.

"Come on, Freddy," she pressed the issue, "you never come along or hang out with us. It'll be fun, you don't gotta do anything, it'll be cool having you around." Ned was hoping the human would finally decide to comply, for he silently agreed with her that it would be novel amusement to have him along for the time.

However, Freddy frowned - something she found to be adorable - and groaned in disapproval. He stopped outside the door to look up into the sky, observing the formation of clouds and chance of rain. The other two followed his gaze, spying a glaring, white dot behind grey and black clouds.

Their concern for his flexibility in the social eccentricities, he determined silently, was silly. How these two constantly surmised he would be willing to go off on their adventures - or requested endlessly when he told them he would not - occasionally came as an insult. He translated much of their dialogue as confessing they believed him to be weak-minded and pathetic, that he could not enjoy life or entertain himself without their extravagant and noisome choices in enjoyment.

Neither subtle conveyance that he wanted nothing of it, nor blatant frustration of the same, seemed to dissuade them from continuing their offerings. Gloria continued to ramble about how much Freddy stayed in his apartment and rarely ventured elsewhere.

"Don't worry, Freddy," added Ned, putting a hand on the human's shoulder, "we won't let you get bored. There's a ton of stuff to do." All three knew it was a lie, but Freddy liked feeling Ned's hand on him like that, causing him to smirk, turning his head to hide it.

"Like what?" Freddy wondered; he looked at them wide eyes and a different sort of smirk. Gloria asked the same question, with sarcasm, staring at the bear wide-eyed as well. Ned only stammered, and understood it was futile to lie any further.

"Please, Freddy, don't make me get on my knees and beg." She knew it was vulgar, and the mental image of her doing so made him battle the urge to kick her shins.

The human's gaze met theirs. First the girl, then the male. That tall, white creature was an intimidating figure, not to the fact that his build was so much larger while Freddy was a smaller animal, but because Ned was so handsome and outstanding. Ned had a large build, was not overweight, but had a round and plush belly, and muscle mass along his entire corpus.

The very presence of the ursine demanded the attention from people, drawing vision to himself from those who found his bright fur distracting. It did distract the human, the white fur surrounding those dark orbs, it was a bit scary, the knowledge of sharp and destructive fangs within that muzzle.

He appeared scary, yes, but true fright came more corporeally in the action of an unknown person moving past them, his gaze stuck on them firmly, coldly. It happened so quickly, and in their conversation had no time to fully understand what it was. This person walked through their personal group, nudging both Freddy and Gloria, paced a few steps beyond, then turned to stare inquisitively - glaring, almost analyzing - appearing as if insulted.

Freddy was startled. Within only several seconds, the human wondered if this person, another human - black hair and black clothes - was looking towards someone else. Next, as the realization that his other human was indeed glaring at Freddy, he wondered if he should say something. It was creepy, simple enough.

At once, the black-dressed man took his leave quickly; Ned did not even notice, having been shuffling through his school pouch for something.

Gloria continued, uninterested in that momentary confrontation, thinking of a time of day or night when she would attend The Den. Ned and her fussed briefly over work schedule conflicts, then settled on a time after 22:00 (the planet having a 26-hour day). Lastly, the group departed, separating in three directions.

To his home, a small and exceedingly shabby apartment amongst many others, and within the human took refuge from the cold bothersome outside environment. Freddy manipulated a piece of technology situated atop a small dresser in the main room and after a few moments of quiet clicking, music resonated from speakers placed in various positions about the room.

From the door came the sound of thumping. Irritation instantaneously manifested inside him. But he would not be bothered any further this day, whoever it was would be told to make it fast. Quickly, Freddy opened the portal to outside to find that stranger there, the human from the school that had distracted him. He introduced himself as Jorg Stridhel and asked if he would be allowed inside to ask Freddy about an offer.

The obtuse phrasing was preposterous, and thus did Freddy demand clarification.

"You are Fredrick Patterson, sir?"

Freddy confirmed this. Now that it was true this stranger was indeed interested in him, all he wanted was to send the man away.

"I have learned recently that you might know the whereabouts of a Den."

Freddy frowned in distrust and groaned. "What are you talking about? Who the hell are you anyway? What do you want?" He demanded impatiently.

"Be calm please. I'm not here to arrest you or kill you right away..." no peace brought with that statement, at all, "But I work for an organization that is very, very interested in the whereabouts and personnel of any organizations of this sort in the area."

Freddy interjected quickly that he did not know where the Den actually was, but felt he would be intelligent enough to not declare that he would be getting directions the next day. Jorg nodded and concluded their meeting, stating that he would come back tomorrow with a colleague to discuss a possible business deal. Last, that this first meeting was only to confirm Jorg had the correct person in question.

It had been many years since Freddy had taken any sort of narcotic drug, yet at this moment, and recollecting the day lived before that moment in time, he was reminded of how blurry life could truly be if he had been high, and that he felt confused as such. But he was just tired, very tired. Freddy hoped that, with this new madness to his life, he would still be able to nap.

~^'^'^~*~^'^'^~ Day 2.

The proceeding day was blessed with a higher abundance of sunlight than the previous, and all three beings had to attend their workplaces prior to their meeting. Freddy departed from his home for the long drive to the hospital. Like most other days of communing to the place, he felt a bit displeased about having to live so far, and once again considered moving to another complex closer to the hospital; it was simply that it could take a great amount of work.

He spent the majority of his day reading, monitoring and utilizing electrocardiograph machines. He could read them and tell of any abnormalities, but in his position, he could not offer his opinions on his observations. He could do so very well with a more advanced education, superior schooling as well... as would be required to practice anything he would truly enjoy.

Freddy easily gained admittance into his current school, as did many prospective medical students. Most there were like him, hoping some day to be privileged with attending a larger college of the profession. Oh, it was such a complicated system though. Even with the most adept skills of learning, or knack of the job, many students were denied. He knew this strict behavior, but like everyone else, did not know why it was so. What were those methods?

From the mouths of his friends, their opinions, and the advice of many others, Freddy's only hope in somehow achieving that ultimate destiny was to work through the various advanced classes in his current school and attain extraordinary grades for an impressive résumé. The strong hopes that this method would suffice superseded the fact of its obvious inadequacy, and thus he continued living as such, simply anticipating the day he could be accepted.

Like school, quite literally every day, those thoughts continued to harass him and distract him from everything he needed to be doing. Freddy was a reasonably intelligent person, so he reminded himself to get to his work more efficiently, and was quite capable of conditioning himself to concentrate on his work and be distracted less by insignificant reveries. It would be a matter of effort. Until he inadvertently conjured Ned into his mind, then he could not help but fantasize further.

Ned's day was equally exciting, for at the computer maintenance office there were few clients this day. He sat behind a table lined with various machines, fiddling with programs and the machines' innards. But his mind wandered to the human, Freddy, and what would happen at the Den later that day. Freddy had been pressured in to attending, and the bear was willing to do everything to make sure the human would not become too bored or get in trouble with any of the 'customers'.

Intelligent too, yes, but with an employment that required much less care (and one that could not involve anyone's death or injury due to distraction) he allowed himself the most extravagant of daydreams of that handsome man. Whichever was more maddening was a contest in his mind: being at school with the young man and being incapable of getting closer to him was terrible completely; however, being at work - usually alone - he still had every bit of emotion for the human, but at least Freddy's body and soul were not there to tease him.

Finally, there arrived a customer.

Gloria, too, received a customer. Buying fabrics, there were several people lined up to make their purchase. She would complete each sale with a smile. Her task in this department was less amusing than either of her other friends'.

The trio always complained to each other about their jobs while at school, when the three managed to find themselves together in a hallway or in the intervals between class time. Those jobs in which they currently worked had been assigned to them before their birth, before their eligibility to obtain them. Simple enough; their parents (however in Ned's situation, his much older cousins) had been employed in the same place, as their elders had, and thus the continuing generations would have the same.

Quite an easy practice to keep oneself employed, but it all left so much to be desired.

It was through the female that the two males were associated with each other. Through the few months they had been in school, Freddy witnessed his friendship with Gloria dwindling severely. She had so many others, many additional companions, so she did not seem to notice the depleting interaction.

Ned did notice it, however, and he thought it was somewhat depressing. He knew there was nothing he could do though, for as she met more people, she found it easier to forget about the human and easier to lose more influence with the bear himself. Ned aspired to occupy the developing apathy with himself, to replace that void of friendship she left inside Freddy. All it would take is some intrusive talking on his part.

Many days, hours during times such as work, school and sleep, Ned pondered upon various methods to which he could persuade Freddy to allow them both a mutual expanse on their acquaintance. With their common interests, Ned frequently requested that the two possibly collaborate on some music, both of them being somewhat capable with guitars and such. Even with writing verse or prose, which Ned knew very well that Freddy greatly enjoyed, the human apparently never wanted to let Ned join on anything of that sort.

Once their workplaces no longer required their services, the three - Gloria, Freddy and Ned - quit their respective locales - not simultaneously of course - and subsequently continued to their goals.

Freddy used a telephone in the hospital to contact Gloria and ask for directions. Once receiving them, he was first to arrive at the Den. This place being a basement in actuality, was hidden from the knowledge and sight of the public by the tavern on the ground level, which was named "Cornik's", named after the owner. He did not know what to do upon entering the place, so he situated himself near the entrance, sitting at a table to wait.

He had been lost in a trance, staring at the wall for about five minutes when a dark-grey dog person strolled across the room, stumbling oafishly across his sprawled legs. Freddy jerked back his legs towards himself and began to stand from the chair. Once he noticed the person was Gloria, she noticed it was him and decided not to scream angrily at him for tripping her.

"Hey man!" She said. The human was not overly pleased to see her, but smiled anyway. She was clad in the same outfit - plain white and dark blue garments - she wore the day previous. In the least bit of his anxiety, she was here and Freddy would have someone to talk with, possibly. He had been getting bored and felt incredibly silly sitting there - possibly in the wrong tavern, with the sporadic directions she had given him - waiting for his acquaintances to arrive for an obscure evening of who knows what.

Once Freddy had stood and moved forward, he was prepared to ask of their plans when two other canines and a goat approached and took initiative. He frowned, immediately surmising that this would be the majority of how he would be treated throughout the night, and considered leaving right away, thus being free from the crowd's obnoxious behavior. He did not know any of them, nor had he ever seen or heard of them, but it was clear they were maniacs and drug fanatics.

One of the strangers was using a fabric cap to cover his long, greasy hair and ears. The accessory was black and seemed to be extremely tight on his head; and the rest of his clothing was very tattered and the color faded. The second dog was much of the same, minus long hair and hat; they were very most likely brethren. The goat was shirtless, and as Freddy glanced across his body, he could see the goat wore bright yellow underwear.

The female population inside the tavern was few, and several of which, Freddy noticed, began to gaze at the half-naked, horned mammal. Will was his name. Freddy found himself doing the same, but he could find no sensual appeal. The fur was white, just like Ned's. He wondered what that bear looked like without his shirt, or that ugly leather jacket.

Freddy began to block them, ignoring their speech and paying no heed to any of their words. After about a minute of their conversation he remained stationary, sighing with ennui and waiting for something to happen, the two canines - Pete and Rick - casting their vision towards his person occasionally.

"Gloria, is that guy with you?" Asked the goat.

Gloria glanced backward and smiled at her friend, "Yeah, that's Freddy. I talked him into coming along with us, but he's not here to do anything, just to hang out."

They immediately became anxious. Freddy noticed it, the three making it obvious with their simultaneous glares to him and secession of breathing. As well, Freddy knew now who they were and why such a magnitude of apprehension. The Den was illegal, and the explanation for such was a long and historical one. However, Freddy felt no concern for their illegalities, and knew he was not a threat to their operation. Their delicate, organized drug provisions and usage was, in fact, barely secreted from the authorities and having a stranger here - with the potential of accidentally confessing these whereabouts - could ruin their lives. Prison for each of them.

Freddy was well aware that these people could be dangerous to him, and knew how hazardous the area could be. But the danger did not affect him, and he took no caution in coming here. Even wielding an effortlessly composed demeanor there lurked a concern that he would be well within reason to flee at once. Yet all the force in the universe could not move him it seemed, for all Freddy could do was remain, wishing that Ned would come in and complete their set so they could conclude their evening's merriment. He made a promise, and intended to keep it (for the moment being).

After a further minute of time, the bear remained absent, so the loiterers moved towards a door. Gloria opened to allow her friends entry and Freddy was the last to pass through, closing the door behind him. Beyond for many paces lie steps, slanting sharply downward. They descended the cold, dark stairwell and passed through another portal.

A thick aroma had been noticed before Gloria had opened the door, and now the scent was strengthened. Following it was a bit of smoke, very sparse in the air from some unknown source or sources, filling the atmosphere. But it was not enough as to make anyone choke, save for those few currently igniting their pipes and inhaling in much excess. To Freddy, it smelled of fields of grass in the summer and spring season, of pollen and weeds.

Upon inspection, via an inquisitive glace across the span of the room, Freddy determined it was an enormous, rectangular chamber, at least 100 meters long. Where he and the others stood, however, was a partitioned space like a foyer, but cluttered with buffoons. To his right jutted a solid wall that stretched outward and stopping shortly to allow a path to the right for movement. To the left was much of the same, but not a solid, concrete wall. Instead, there seemed to be positioned makeshift walls made of wood and cardboard it seemed, forming something that could only be seen further around the left corner.

The lighting was dim, made so by strings of tiny white bulbs normally used for miscellaneous decorations. Several mammals loitered - those buffoons Freddy noticed upon entrance - along the left wall. They were wildly moving and laughing, grabbing and shoving each other quite playfully.

As the group moved, Freddy noticed that a small portion of the right wall was completely covered with paper. Not obscured overall by one continuous sheet, but fashioned from hundreds of single pages, all different types of paper, scribbled on and apparently categorized. There were banners situated at the top of this large bulletin board indicating what was written: "Positive Flow", "Negative Flow" and "U Structure".

At the intersection, the room spread out left and right. To the right, beyond the thick wall, was a sparse crowd, a myriad of creatures. Several of the beings were lying on tattered cots, or resting on decrepit sofas with smoking apparatuses nearby.

"This is an UUU den?" Asked the human. The mentioned narcotic was a simple herb, but very difficult to harvest and sell to the public.

"Ah..." began Rick, the dog wearing the hat, "Just over there. We don't do that shit, it doesn't get to you like perception chems do."

"That's 'cos it doesn't cause tachycardia and fever." Freddy responded

"Yeah, but it gives you the universe in return for a little discomfort."

Freddy only replied with a mumbled agreement. The canines evidently found it to be in poor manner, insulting.

"Look, punk, if you don't like it, then why'd you come?" Rick wondered. Freddy could only reply with a slow shrug and confessing he truly did not have any motives in coming, other than a forced invite.

Rick scoffed and rolled his eyes, "You'll just get in the way and piss us off." Freddy presumed that Gloria would come to his defense, yet she stood silent with the face of a dufus.

Next, from her body came some strange, gibbering whirls and clicks; perhaps she was about to detonate. Gloria removed her phone from a pocket, answered the call, discussed for a few seconds, ended the call, then explained that Ned had just told her he could not make it to the meeting, being very busy with something.

Freddy then said goodbye and turned to leave, now having utterly lost himself in his apathy for the Den. However, Rick demanded his attention again. The dog moved forward to seize Freddy's wrist as if propelled, then threatened his life if he told anyone about their operation or location.

"Get the fuck off me." The human said calmly, "I'm not tellin' no one."

Freddy wiggled his arm to loosen the grip, but the dog grabbed his shoulder and grimaced, "I don't believe you. You slip some shit from your mouth once and everything here is shut down, everything we've worked for will be totally fucked. Because of you." The enraged, ugly mammal continued to describe further possible punishments he and his companions would receive.

"Who the hell would I be talking to that could get you in trouble?" Freddy argued, "I don't talk to anyone, all right?"

Rick looked towards the other two; a few of the hysterical folk near to them also glanced to see the commotion. Someone desired to see a fight, and began cheering on the dog as if he were already wining.

"Shut the fuck up!" Pete bellowed, reaching to free the human, succeeding.

Rick rolled his eyes and walked away veering left, away from the UUU. He rotated and made some additional threat, then Gloria gave a subdued attempt at calling Freddy back, but he had since turned his mind to his utter disappointment in Ned. The human easily let this feeling consume him along the drive to his apartment, and let it transform to anger.

Ned arrived an hour later and asked for the whereabouts of his friend. After listening to Pete's explanation, he gave Rick a shove so veracious it sent the dog to the concrete floor. There would be no brawl though, for the canine was already intoxicated with calming chems and did not care to fight back, even if he could. Nor did he care to stand or sit up, remaining there the rest of the night.

~^'^'^~*~^'^'^~ Day 3.

Jorg returned and explained to an insomniac Freddy that he came by the previous day to find Mr. Patterson not at home. The shorter, darker haired man now stood at his door, a second human in accompaniment, asking to be invited within for their discussion. Freddy was ready to decline them everything, prepared to forfeit the act of having more stress added to his life.

Outside there was bright sunlight that stung his dilated pupils, so with that, he could not actually look at Jorg's face at the time, and was tempted to allow them entry simply so he could shut the door.

"We know you are a budding medical student, and are aware of how difficult it can be to get into medical school. If you let me talk to you about this situation..." Freddy allowed him entry.

"I will get right to the point, it seems you have nothing going on today, but I am actually busy; this will only take a few minutes." Jorg stood beside the sofa by the wall and Freddy sat in a chair, waiting. The second human said nothing.

"Are you in a friendship with someone that is part of a drug operation?" Freddy nodded, thinking the phrasing was odd. Jorg then described some strange and unknown corporation that helped the government control such surreptitious outfits, such as drug Dens or meditative temples, shrines to worship illegal religions. Freddy knew very well that religion was illegal, any manner of practicing the ancient psionic beliefs was forbidden, and Freddy had to stop Jorg from explaining that too, claiming he was not a total idiot.

"That's good, you make my job easier." Jorg mentioned, smirking happily.

"What kinda drugs are illegal?" Freddy asked, "Nothing that we use at the hospital I'm sure?"

"Oh no..." Jorg then recited a list of punishable narcotics and herbs, Cold, Perception and UUU being the first three. "Quite simply, we need to find every Den in existence and shut them down. Those involved will have to suffer the consequences."

"What kinda consequences?" Freddy asked.

"Well, everyone involved will be imprisoned, several most likely executed, depending on their err... depth into the psionic practices." With the word "executed", Freddy knew finally that these people worked completely independent of the government. He expressed this view, stating that he was sure executions were just as illegal as taking Cold or other chems or murder.

"Frederick, we are not part of the government." Jorg continued, and Freddy made it clear he wanted nothing to do with it.

"Look, Mr. Stridhel, I do not want to get involved in any of this; I'd rather stay away from the Dens completely than have to get caught up in something this dangerous."

"Let me tell you, Frederick, what we can offer you for this information you have. We can, and most certainly will, offer you a free and guaranteed passage into any medical school you want. Of course, you cannot leave the country, that's where our jurisdiction ends."

At once, Freddy became fascinated, as made obvious by his open mouth, looking silly again as he frequently did. His instinct in those first few seconds was to confess immediately and obtain the supposed future admittance. Yet he could never simply forget of those consequences, and was not totally convinced of Jorg's sincerity.

"And all of my friends there will be arrested?" He asked to verify. Jorg clarified that most would, however, the ringleaders - the drug traffickers - would need to be "taken care of", which Freddy translated as "killed". Freddy thought to Ned and Gloria, now utterly frightened at their fate, what of their stance with the others in the Den. Now, after all his inconsiderate behavior towards that habit of his friends, he wished that he had paid them even some slight attention when they conversed about their dealings.

He knew Ned was definitely not deep into the pseudo-religious aspect of the Den, and was very hopeful that his bear friend was not a dealer or distributor. Yet for all his dwindling knowledge pertaining to that canine friend of his, there was no memory of her standing with it. Her notoriety lead him to believe she may have been one of the more influential customers, but probably not a financial supporter.

"What about if I say no, and I refuse to tell you anything?" Freddy ventured.

Jorg squinted and gave Freddy a strange look, tilting his head as if not understanding. "What could possibly deter you... well, if they really are your friends, I can see where you'd find trouble. We could always just torture you, or make you watch as we execute your friends and loved ones in front of your eyes. But I figured the proposition of guaranteed medical school was a much better incentive."

The options laid before him lead to the destruction of his friendships, it seemed. If he told them all he knew, gone they would be forever, and if he remained silent, those horrors could be inflicted, and Freddy believed these people to be genuine now.

"We'll give you time to think about it. But we have some more things to take care of today." Jorg said goodbye and quit the place, leaving Freddy alone to consider the offer he had just been presented.

He continued to remain at home, lying in bed, staring a wall. Aural senses flooded with macabre droning, a low sound that could have been from a person humming. No, that was music, emanating from a device and vibrating the music through the room. Soft and ambient, it paralleled the scene of darkness and warm temperature with its atmosphere, aurally painting the inside of his room.

The human gave his best attempt at sleeping, those dreams having kept his mind from resting properly the night before, but it did not transpire. He did not work this day, had no classes, and had nothing exciting on his schedule. He could go buy food to fill the empty fridge, watch the news to see the predicted weather, go to a movie theater and be mildly entertained by fictitious stories in his many books.

Nothing was more appealing than sleep to him now, not even reading some of his favorite poetry or novels. Even though it would not apparently occur, he would lie on his side nevertheless, hoping and wishing he could drift off, simply enjoying the music. The thought of the Den plagued him mercilessly, and the stress of knowing he could not get into his proper college unless he truly pressed for the knowledge from anyone with higher authority were the factors adding to his lack of sleep.

Yet now with this Jorg person's offer - if it was not a humongous hoax - Freddy would no longer feel worried over such dilemmas. The repercussions, while inevitably weak, coursed through his conscience, continuously bringing him to believe they amounted to be horrifying. Such betrayal on his part, it would lead to not only hatred from those involved, but he would be responsible for causing deaths.

Death, caused by murder, had been the ultimate crime under the rule of the psionics a hundred years ago. It was the greatest atrocity that any living being could imagine. These new people, this "corporation", truly did believe in nothing of that sort, and was apparently adamant in exemplifying the opposing practice. So much in fact, that merely practicing religion - that had been rendered obsolete by those very demi-gods who had constructed it - was punishable by that ultimate offense. The world was now so twisted and backwards from how it used to be.

He knew he should go back to the Den; he felt obligated now, but only for those reasons known only to him, the compelling drive to search for new routes in life, a guaranteed route to success. He knew it would be impossible to find those folks of higher authority on his own. It was a prestige rank, they all had, and he had no one to link him to those higher to him. No one except this Jorg.

Mr. Stridhel was that person, whose existence he had been questioning for most of his life. So why Freddy had hesitated even in the slightest, he did not know. Perhaps he should accept their offer, but another thought was to go quickly and warn those in the Den of Stridhel's business.

Oh, hell, if he could only fall asleep!

Staying there for such a length of time now, an hour and almost another, began to become monotonous, but at least it balanced the chaos in his mind. Those horrid dreams that occurred in cycles of three or four days, they made it impossible to sleep or concentrate the next day. At least here, mimicking a coma, he could compensate the lost time with simple relaxation. There was nothing better to do at the moment.

He closed his eyes after staring at ants marching along the wall; he pictured those people he had mingled with earlier in the week. That ugly dog, the less ugly dog, the moderately attractive female and the striking Ned, they all occupied his thoughts now.

A fascination of his, the thoughts of Ned. Not an infatuation though, he was not obsessed or in love. He liked bears, that was one reason. The other was... readily escaping him. He thought the species was attractive, beautiful even, having artworks strewn about the place depicting such magnificence. But in all the possible, erotic fantasies he could imagine of such critters, Ned was always the main character.

There must be something about that white ursine that drew his mind to his so often. Freddy convinced himself it was all mental, that there was no emotional aspect; thus, he was not in love, nor was Ned somewhere secluded skrying to gain an ethereal telepathy. Nevertheless, that factor of his obsession was there, he just could not determine what it was. Perhaps it may have simply been that Ned was the only bear Freddy actually knew, and it was easier to fantasize about something real. Perhaps, Freddy wondered if his own skrying of the wall and thinking of Ned was having the same effect on the bear.

The phone call? Yes, it must have affected the bear, because there was Ned speaking through the receiver.

Freddy at first was going to ignore the ringing, not yet knowing it was Ned. But he convinced himself it may have been the hospital looking to bring him back in, bring him to end his boredom. With that thought, the human answered, moving slowly from the hard mattress and approaching the sitting room where the phone was screaming to be answered. He did, greeting the unknown entity wherever it was.

"Hey, is this Freddy?" The person queried, and Freddy confirmed. Then the speaker explained who he was. Freddy's eyes went wide and his heart rate increased. Was that a coincidence? He wondered. If it was, then his luck was good, and that finally added a bit of joy to his life of no sleeping. Yet with the reaction he had just felt, Freddy doubted his own assurance that he was not in love; perhaps he had a crush.

"Oh, hi..." Freddy said after a few moments of his intrigue, "how are you?" Ned stated he was feeling well, then began giving condolences regarding the incident with Rick the night prior to this.

"Oh, yeah. I didn't feel like being around him if he was gonna be a jerk all night." Freddy mentioned.

"I know; I took care of it. So when you come back tonight it won't be a problem."

Freddy stated that he most likely did not desire to ever return. Ned expected that and was prepared for persuasion. He continued to apologize profusely, explaining that his reason for absence had been to help his sister in transporting her belongings to a new location, then having to deal with part of her car failing and needing to be repaired.

"Ah, it's all right. I don't think it's my kinda thing anyway."

"What do you mean?" This is where his persuasion would start, "You like to mediate and sit around and relax right?" Freddy confirmed this. "So why not do it with other people and hang out with them?"

"I don't really like people."

"You don't like me?" Immediately, he regretted that question. Both males could feel their ears warm with discomfort or embarrassment... or possibly excitement. Freddy, for a short while, could only respond with a sound, trying to think of what to say.

"Ah! You know what I mean. I just want you to come on down with us so we can... get to know each other better." Ned did not think he was doing well, making himself sound like pleading for a date. Freddy grew eager at the offer, wanting badly to accompany him and become a closer friend.

Both minds worked veraciously for a reply. Freddy wanted to quickly agree before Ned changed his mind or retracted the offer. Ned decided to remain silent and not risk saying anything stupid.

"Yeah, I'll go." Freddy said. Ned chuckled with a smile and thanked Freddy, then stated he would be glad to offer him a ride. That sounded fine to him, but being stranded with someone without an immediate mode of escape - his own car - made Freddy accept with trepidation.

About four or five minutes elapsed with the two bantering about how their day went. Ned had worked but took off early for a reason he machinated on the spot simply to get out of there. Upon hearing what the human did throughout the day, Ned thought it would be nice to just lie about as such. The human did not explain why he was doing it, nor mentioned his meeting with Jorg.

In the time spent between the call and the arrival, Freddy attempted to play some songs on his old acoustic guitar, just to pass the time. But he never really gave the thing much attention, and was not very skilled, but enjoyed making sounds and random chords progressions. Soon, Ned put a stop to that insanity by arriving and leaving with the human in the passenger seat.

Freddy was glad to be there, away from the pastel backdrop that was his lousy home. Being near the bear was pleasant in itself, being able to hear his deep voice speak to him so compassionately. It was strange to hear such speaking patterns from Ned. His voice was now so modified to be joyful and entrancing. That alone made Freddy happy, made him comfortable, and made him feel secure. Maybe Neil was high, though.

The sun was setting and the sky it illuminated was still flooded with dark clouds not yet sending the city rain again. The sunset's coloring of the sky was mostly orange, some red on the bottom near the hills in the distance. If Freddy had been by himself and alone, he would have immediately parked the machine in the nearest place available and removed himself to watch the star disappear. Here, he could only see it through glass, though clean, but it was still enjoyable. Freddy found much more joy in the bear's voice than the sun.

And now, with several mildly pleasant concepts surrounding him, those few but highly stressful notions that had so diseased his mind for the past few months seemed to vanish instantly. Even the presence of someone he greatly enjoyed being with and the beauty of the naturally existing landscape was enough to calm his brain, his deliberations, and allow him to effectively forget everything in life, everything that caused him - and many others, he was sure - mental hassle.

For a few minutes, he paid attention to nothing but existence, to the supposed energy emanating from the planet itself, the bear next to him, and he was aware of his own magnetism, that 'spiritual' radiation pulsing from his body. For once, after a long while, he was happy... content... absent of stress. Freddy saw nothing bad, nothing negative, and nothing chaotic. Of course, this all might have been ascribed to the state of sleepiness Freddy was now experiencing.

While the human may not have mentally noticed his own neutrality at the time, it was a moment in life - as known before this time - which he was at true ease. Though he would never realize it, now was a monument to his being, the true spirit of this entity gliding amongst the planes of reality and ethereality, leaving Freddy totally unaware. His subconscious persona wanted this to be eternal.

Just as soon as the sound of the engine and the whirring of the wheels began to irritate Freddy, the bear stopped the vehicle and removed himself. Freddy was quick to follow, running from the door while closing it to catch up with the bear moving ahead of him. However, Ned had waited and found himself to collide with the clumsy human.

For a brief moment, Freddy was holding onto Ned with both hands, and felt tense, having just stupidly bumped into him. They smiled at each other, the bear softly chuckling as Freddy moved close. Ned turned to walk along, achieving about five or six paces, then realized his friend had stopped, intentionally gaining a distance.

Freddy was feeling a bit foolish in his enthusiasm to be with the bear, having dashed to his side like a child to his mother. That could never happen though; the one time only a moment ago had been embarrassing.

The bear was certain that Freddy was still a bit nervous around him and the Den, so he slowed down to allow the human to catch up, Ned asking what the human's problem was. Ned wrapped his arm around Freddy's shoulders, very gently, and gave the human a hug of sorts. Freddy could only grin. Freddy was by his side again, and Ned wanted to say something, get him talking so he did not feel so anxious, but Freddy had a question.

"Do you do a lot of drugs?" Freddy asked.

Ned laughed and replied in the negative, "I used to do perception stuff back in high school with some of those guys. It's really weird how they still do it. Like they refuse to grow up." There were a few moments of silence as they approached the door and moved through.

The tavern's business hours ended at a certain point, but the Den underneath was open to anyone at all times. There were beings constantly slipping in and out all through the night, entering to get a fix or in hope to see The Universe or some other abstract concept. Some of them reported seeing angels or a god itself, both of which, Freddy knew were even more ridiculous.

"That's a reason why I wanted you to come with me." The phrase did not exactly make sense to the human, so Freddy asked for clarification. "Well, I don't mean to sound like, uh... like I'm using you. But I'm just getting sick of them, they are the same since we were teens, haven't changed a bit. I just want to know someone new, someone more intelligent."

"Like... me?" Yes. The human shrugged, not exactly having a comment for that one. It was a strange way to phrase what the bear was obviously trying to say, but he enjoyed the fact regardless of verbal delivery. Having Ned's arm draped over him was as soothing as could be.

There were a few people occupying the tavern, mostly resting and being silent. Upon passing a table of female humans, they all turned to Freddy and grinned. "Hey cutie." One of them said, reaching out to graze her paw across Freddy's thigh.

He turned around and gave them a simple wave, looking her directly in the eyes, saying, "Hi." It was a tactic used to thwart off those sexy predators... sexual predators, making his voice as sarcastic and condescending as possible. He did not want to be followed by them with false acceptance, possibly be stalked and fondled for the rest of the night.

The bear turned and asked what he said to them, if he knew the girls personally. Freddy explained what she did and his reaction, and the reason for it.

"So, you just act like a..." the bear tried to think of some good comparison, "slow-in-the-head goof?" Freddy laughed and agreed with it. "What? You don't like girls?"

Freddy's spirit shook suddenly, and for fleeting moment he questioned Ned's sexuality. Then he forced himself to ask, "You know that I'm gay, don't you?" Idiot, he was... nervous.

"Yeah, me too." Ned looked at him with a smirk, "I was just joking around, Freddy." Ah, just as he thought. Ned had to ask if Freddy had known, and the human confirmed in the positive.

Next, they were down into the Den, into the smoke once again. There was a crowd waiting for them: Rick, Pete, Gloria and William, plus another whom Freddy did not know, another canine, brownish-grey. They all shouted in joy and moved towards them to greet their bruin partner. The human stared at them. He expected Rick to say something, anything, smart-ass or apologetic; nothing came from his mouth that was directed at the human though.

They all turned to go left, past the bulletins and towards the perception area where things were more furnished to allow more entreating hallucinations (which is how William explained it). Ned turned to see Freddy was not in the group, but motionless, frowning as if perturbed by one of them, shaking his head, looking disappointed.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

Freddy leaned to peek out and see if Rick was still there, "That Rick guy, he's such a yard-dog."

Ned's face twisted strangely, but grinning quite evidently at the insult. "A yard-dog?"

"Yeah, a yard-dog with a hat."

Ned could only laugh, expelling so much lung air he had to gasp to regain it. A few beings around them hooted for him, joining his laughter with their own. Only his was from humor, not delirium, and Freddy was unsure why Ned had found it to be so funny.

"Don't say that to him, he might get violent."

Like his previous visit to this place, there were groups of people - friends most likely - gathered at the entrance, as if waiting for reservations or a waiter. But there were no waiters, no one to serve complimentary samples of UUU or perception chems on a platter for the demented or psychotic, wannabe existentialists.

These few stragglers had either been escorted from the main room beyond, or distracted by their essays upon the wall. As Freddy and Neil moved past them, the human looked to the bulletin board again, with those banners and their titles. He asked Ned if he could explain the collage for him, but Ned suggested he ask Will or Pete instead.

He motioned for Freddy to follow him in a jog to achieve their group's location. Freddy moved past the corner to see a very long hall of incompletely partitioned rooms - cells, almost - along the left side, the right being a solid wall of concrete. Windows were set up along the roof, the ground level of the tavern, small curtains currently closed to obscure the views of passersby.

Will explained that their "cell" was the third down, and continued to walk, Freddy curiously peering into each of the open cells as they passed. There were no doors, having been taken off the hinges for each room, and the innards were consistent. It was either filled with comatose residents, or those giggling idiotically and romping.

The environment was relatively quiet, save for laughter resounding from various addicts or freaks, those latter folk dancing randomly, one such enticing Freddy to waltz. The girl grabbed his arm and tried to spin them on their feet, Freddy's ursine friend only chuckling, having experienced the same thing from the same person. When she realized neither Freddy nor Ned would cooperate with her ballet of intoxication, she dashed away, disappearing around the corner.

"Freddy," William began "are you going to be indoctrinated as well as Marshal here?" Freddy noticed the stranger, Marshall, look back to him, swaying his head awkwardly.

"Hey guys, I'm only here for the double-girl fantasy." Marshall explained plainly. As the group was now at their destination, Rick stopped Marshall from entering.

"Marsh, we told you, there are no sexual fantasies here. This place is for spiritual enlightenment, if you want to fuck girls, go to a brothel. Should I tell you were one is?" Marshall groaned and shook his head, his face showing nausea.

"Nah, I'll stay man, if this really is gonna help with... you know." Freddy was ignorant, but hoped clarification would soon follow this babbling. He did not care for the reasoning behind Marshal's rambling, but rather the intent of their evening.

"Will, Freddy's gonna be indoctrinated too. Is that okay?" Ned stated. The human frowned and groaned in disapproval, though nearly inaudible.

"Yes of course!" The goat said enthusiastically. "You all have a seat and I'll begin the instructions."

All took random seats. There was a sofa that could sit three beings, and on the other two walls were smaller sofas that sat two. Freddy, Ned and Gloria sat on the larger, while Rick and Marshall, with Will and Pete taking love-seats, respectively.

Centered was a table, previously used in medical facilities as medication and drug apparatus storage. Its look was clean, and appeared brand new and was currently fully stocked with various chems and beverages. Against the far wall was a large monitor - a television screen - currently blank. Freddy wondered how they could have afforded such things, curious if all the other rooms had these screens as well (those few he had seen, did not).

Will then began to discuss with Freddy, asking if the human knew of the Den's functions.

"Can we watch porn?" Marshal asked stupidly.

"We're not here to jerk off; we're here to watch the Universe." Rick reminded him, browsing through an assortment of data disks.

"Hey, Freddy," spoke Pete, "you're smart, you should be able to see good flows, right?"

"Excuse me; I was talking him, shut up for a minute." The goat brayed.

The human looked to the goat with his eyes, wondering why he was being directly addressed, in such a somewhat-professional manner. "I'm here because I'm with Ned. I don't think I really have any interest in enlightenment. However, I am fairly interested in--"

"Well, you really don't have to do anything." William replied "But it will be very boring if you don't. It's pretty much all we do here."

"That's what I'm trying to say, I don't wanna be bored. I wanna try this outta my own curiosity, but I just wanted to clarify that I don't have any care for ... whatever it is you guys study here."

The goat resumed his speech, explaining that their group studied The Universe, its structure, its frequencies, the dual energies of the Universe. Personal and planetary magnetisms, and other ethereal auras. Their goal was to find definite patterns in each or any of them and that most of the users in the particular area of The Den were physics or psionic history students.

"Not me, man." Marshall blurted stupidly; William ignored him.

"What would you do with whatever you find?" Freddy asked. The fact that their practice here was illegal truly did not perturb the human. Not legally punishable by severe methods, it would merely be an inconvenience to spend a few days discussing his knowledge with the authorities. And the knowledge that all these folks would either be killed or imprisoned eternally if he told the Jorg was not an issue for him at the moment. He was simply considering these people, considering them for the slaughter.

Ned then explained that whichever drug one takes would effectively "tune" his or her mind to whatever the concept was for observation. Then Will proceeded to explain what types of magnetism occurred in the Universe, but Freddy had learned all this when he was a child.

"Oh, I'm very familiar with the psionic history." Freddy said, "I'm not a student of course..."

"Okay, okay, good." William smiled. "Now, depending on a person's personal soul, his Divine Alphas, you can either witness Positive or Negative constructs of whatever. The difference is kinda shady sometimes, but it's the emotional and mental feeling you acquire during the length of observation. Positive is a strong feeling of worth, Negative of loss or pain. Unknown structures are those that really don't fit either category."

Though it was the goal of The Den, spiritual enlightenment, mania was the main product of usage, for many found it to be much more entertaining. Then, William concluded his speech.

William, Rick and Pete began discussing logistics for the evening. They chose the chem to be used by them personally, the dosage for each person, the temperature regulation for the room, and what video to watch on the screen. It was further explained, though at this point Freddy was not really paying much attention to the instructions, that the videos were computer made graphic videos of structures already seen by higher class psionic historians or students, that seeing a common construct of something would induce seeing it manifest.

"Which drugs are available?" Freddy motioned towards the small, plastic containers of various drugs, each colored red blue or grey.

Rick was ready to take over for William, leaving him to the monitor. The greasy dog, a faint but not revolting stench about him, described three separate drugs. Perception, dimension and calming chems. As Pete became animated in his speech, Freddy found his interest waning severely, and no longer paid attention to the dog's yammering. Pete let himself get sidetracked throughout the entire speech, having to stop and giggle at some memory, or request a bit of knowledge from Will, and did not seem to notice that Freddy was no longer listening.

"And you hope to gain the ability to control your own energy, and the planet's energy for your own benefits." Freddy sighed.

"Exactly." Rick grinned. Oh yes, this was very illegal; these were religious fanatics. The Chaos War almost a hundred years ago had been issued for this very reason, and these types of clandestine organizations were illegal for the same reason. However, he questioned it no further, not wanting to give away the presence of his espionage.

Pete began to explain the design of calming-chem, but he quit soon after as Freddy interjected that he was more than familiar with it.

It was an extremely dangerous drug to take, and very rarely used outside of the medical field. In very small doses, taken in concurrence with pain killers, it was an excellent muscle relaxant. However, in a large dose the reaction would total paralysis, an increase in circulation, and make the body produce so much heat that dehydration was the most common cause of death with calming-chem usage.

William asked Gloria and Ned what they would be taking. She loudly spurted a noise that suggested indifference and proclaimed she did not want to badly trip tonight and would suffice to use herbs. Easy enough, nothing liquid to prepare in a needle, she began to rummage through the drawers in the table. Ned agreed with Gloria's decision and did the same.

Then Freddy was asked what he wanted to take tonight. The human moved from the sofa to peruse the drawers to see what else he could find of interest. Something milder.

"Dimension-chem". He quickly said, soon after seeing it. The "Cold", as it was usually referred to, was indeed much milder, and more rarely used by itself than calming-chem. Its purpose was infinitesimal, and only medications extracted from those chemicals in Cold were used in proper settings. Cold, in this manner was only a narcotic, increasing the perception of hearing and touch. Freddy would not mention that he had never used such a drug.

"Are you sure?" William asked, frowning slightly. "It's gonna get cold as hell in here if you don't." At this, Freddy averted his gaze to the table again, his expression not changing. Freddy assured the goat of his decision, and William made no further comment.

As Freddy prepared his needle, William and Pete moved to the large screen and began fussing over which structure video to watch.

The three males then took their drug. The effects would manifest in only a few moments, the chemical flowing straight to the central nervous system and blocking the gateway control of their perceptions until they were rendered temporarily autistic. Last, it would diminish the electric synapse in their brains and decrease the speed of neurotransmitter recycling.

Freddy felt the sofa's cushion shift slightly as the large bear next to him wiggled in order to make himself more comfortable, Gloria stretching out her legs and slouching in a very masculine, haphazard manner. Rick, the detestable oaf, then made a comment about forgetting the "air", then moved across the room with two leaping strides. The first propelling him from the cushion of his couch, the second - after the first landed - further moved him closer to the door. He slowed in order not to crash into the frame and quickly manipulated the device to the correct settings for the usage of Perceptions.

Soon after, a metallic clink sounded from the video screen ahead of the group. All looked to it except Will, who was still manipulating the console of the machine. There was a blank white image, behind the plastic cover. Then, Freddy felt the scheduled cold air spill forth from the ducts in the ceiling above them. It was meant to be exclusive to the room, and thus the lack of a door seemed illogical. Freddy surmised that ease of escape or rescue was the reasoning behind not having a door to keep in warm or cool air. The risk of injury or death - via cause of drugs - was greater than that of the loss of air.

It did not matter to Freddy, though. He did not plan on taking such a great amount of the chemical, though, having accidentally injected himself much more than a required dosage.

"Are there defibrillators anywhere near here?" He asked.

"Actually, yes." William replied quickly, having finished with his fiddling and sat down. The screen now was showing much of the same, white blankness. With some shades of grey and light blue, it changed slightly, circular patterns of digital color and light. It meant nothing to Freddy, but apparently it was extremely influential to the others.

Will, Rick and Pete stared amazed at it, smiling somewhat, holding a distracted conversation about how bizarrely accurate it all was to the true sensations of Cold. Their words flowed oddly, and to Freddy they began to register as vague, or obscured and faint in a way, as if they spoke from behind a thick wall or from a great distance.

The room became cold...

The potency of his own increasing high was not yet noticed, and his attention drifted to his friend, Ned, instead. Freddy had not noticed him or Gloria taking their herbs, but it was clear to him that the girl was truly in a state of euphoria. He felt sleepy.

Instantly, the human entered stage two sleep and began to freeze. The chemicals, unlike Perceptions - quite the reverse, in truth - slowed the heart rate dramatically and prevented the body from producing heat. Normal circumstances would bring no harm, but in the current situation, with the cold air blowing down on them, Freddy would soon become extremely uncomfortable.

If Freddy had fallen asleep, the bear was not sure, but the human was stirred by his attack. The bear had struck him in the shoulder, chest or back maybe... And for several seconds Freddy had to recover, not only realizing he was almost incapable of moving to defend himself from an attack that had not transpired, but also to the knowledge that the bear was merely inquiring as to Freddy's frame of mind.

It was then obvious, many minutes after this, that Freddy was now barely conscious. The Cold would not truly bring its user to sleep - of course one could easily fall asleep (and it would not last long) - the purpose was to induce the state of sleep, but remain mildly cognizant. None of this concerned Ned, however. Upon another touch, he found how cold Freddy's skin was and was lost in guilt.

...arrived then, the cold, freezing hell. And all those rays, shining blistering light upon the planet had at once vanished, it seemed and left him with no guard of his own, splitting his veins wide open, leaving him burnt and anguished to the ice.

Ned was feeling competent, and quite capable of motion and speed; his drugs had been milder than he thought. He attempted to shut down the airflow to the room. Tinkering with the controls adjacent to the couch was futile, and upon running upstairs to ask the owner - an ill-tempered fox - he learned it would not be done. No change would occur simply for the mistake of a stupid human creature. Fighting the urge to smash the fox's face, Ned returned to his cell.

The worst part was when he descended to hell itself. That was his body falling to the floor, and no one being fast enough to catch him. Ned was quick to rectify the Freddy's bad condition, practically leaping from the couch to pull his friend away from the ground, to rescue him from that psychological torment he was experiencing. For only those few second in which Ned's hands were on him did the human feel any manner of comfort in his insanity.

...How long he would be there in that state of paranoia, was the nightmare. Any change in the weather around him, each breath seemed to be a hurricane above. Each bout of talking or laughing was a torrent of unceasing ridicule. The Universe itself was tearing him apart, showing him the most horrific images of pain and misery. Yet all this was only concept; he was simply having a bad trip.

Immediately, he knew Freddy was not fairing well with his indoctrination. And upon perusal of Freddy's needle, it was an obvious overdose, though not lethal. The human was curled like a fetus, face pointed downward towards his heart, his hand grasping his genitals desperately.

Ned glanced across the room, towards his company, the three males moving only to reach and inscribe something, then collapse to continue staring at the wall or screen; Marshall had taken what they had, so was doing the same. Gloria and Freddy remained motionless. Elsewhere in the vicinity, some other cell or the exit perhaps, came the sounds of hysteria, someone giggling in a fit, a bout of laughter.

...still, the ice water rushed over him so fluidly, it seemed to separate the skin from his body. There was just no end to that damned torment! Each motion from that monument on which Freddy reposed, nailed there by enormous frozen needles, was being pummeled with a glacier. That was just Gloria standing up, her body shaking the cushions under the two remaining males; she needed a drink.

But... would no one save him?

The human was shivering and just barely respiring. It was a typical reaction to the chemicals he had taken, but Ned still felt deeply concerned. Freddy's only real experience with these types of drugs had been so long ago, in high school - with friends now gone due to neglect - and another nightmarish thought that was coursing through Ned's mind was of Freddy's impending psychosis due to this terrible experience. It could be something from which he would never fully recover.

Nevertheless, there was nothing dramatic to be done; they would simply need to wait for it to weaken. At the point in time when Gloria's high was gone, Ned's had been gone before it and Pete, Rick and Will were recovering slightly. The effects of calming-chem, those three that had taken it doing so with proper dosages, had dwindled enough to allow them to physically stand up on two legs.

Though each person with those declining intoxications held a mental grasp - loose it was - they would not be able to operate their vehicles for a bit longer. Thus, Gloria offered to transport them to their destinations. Rick and Pete, brothers after all, were to one place while Gloria would most likely try to get William to be her escort to her own domicile.

"Well, I dunno what else to do." Mumbled Rick, he and Pete were scribbling on small, tattered notepads. "This was pretty disappointing."

"We'll try again tomorrow maybe." Pete suggested, stuffing all the scattered items upon the table into random drawers therein.

It had only been an hour, a few minutes past that mark. The time had sped their metabolic rates significantly and each expressed strong desires to balance their bodies, fill their bellies. As they began to slowly exit the premises, asking each other what to do for food, Gloria asked Ned why he was not coming with them.

"Um, because Freddy's still here. He's not feeling well, can't you see that?" The bear frowned at her, wondering if she even cared.

"He'll be fine." She shrugged with the phrase, "If he's made it this far without dying, he'll be fine. Just lay him down." Gloria then moved forward with the idea of pushing Freddy onto his side, yet Ned stopped her, standing quickly, shaking the couch again...

...Then, it was as if the only solid ground collapsed, and eternally he precipitated into some kind of blistering, white chasm, all built in cascading showers of burning ice and wind. Even the friction from his own breath pained him. If there had been any way to shield his eyes from the light, or to at least hold himself for some manner of comfort, he would have more gracefully accepted his fate.

At once, just once - and for only a fraction of a moment - there was a warmth. To Ned it was simply him touching Freddy's shoulder once as he stood. But the human lying there cold felt it all as a quick relief from his terror.

"Fine, if you all wanna leave, then go. I'm staying here." The bear explained. Whatever ill feeling his friend was experiencing, Ned wanted to remain for Freddy to have someone present upon his awakening.

"You don't have to, what are you talking about?" Rick argued. "Just leave him a note saying you'll come back in the morning, I do it all the time with Pete."

"No, Rick, I'm not gonna leave him here. I asked him to come along and I'll be damned if I just let him stay here with crazy shits coming in and out."

"Ned, look at him, you think anyone's gonna bother that emaciated-looking human?"

"He looks fine, you shit-head. And no, I don't care, I'm not gonna argue anymore, so why don't you just move along?" Though he would not explain the more personal benefit to keeping Freddy company, Gloria seemingly understood and began ushering her other friends from the cell.

Ned's psychological dependence on contact was now fully controlling him. Here, he had the person whom he had been thinking about for months, this human who had occupied his thoughts for hours, daily, endlessly. For quite some time, his mind demanded contact, contact with the human. The fantasies in his imagination were of no decent compromise; they betrayed his own desires and insulted his mind. None of that could even compare to how reality would make him feel.

Constantly reminding himself to keep control of himself, he repeated that it was all just a "crush".

It controlled him, yes, for now that he truly believed that Freddy needed him there, he would never leave his friend. Ned was the only reason that the human decided to join in their merriment. And with Freddy's attempt at simulating the others' entertainment, he seemed to have found nothing but misery. The bear would remain to protect and comfort his crush for as long as necessary.

The bear stood and moved out of their chamber of drugs and looked about for anyone. Stepping along a few meters, he saw few others under the influence and heard mostly silence; seems that Rick had been correct, that Freddy would be safe by himself. No matter, Ned would not leave Freddy there to his cold self.

He wished to have some sort of antidote to the drugs, but knew they were unavailable at the moment. The beleaguered creature returned to the cell to see that Freddy had toppled onto his side, this time remaining up on the furniture, and was trying to use his weakened arms to push himself. Ned was quick to help, and repositioned the human into his sitting position. Then he reclined, once again, on the sofa next to his friend, another glacial impalement, unknown to Ned.

For the sounds outside of the room, they measured in the lowest decibels. He neither heard nor saw a single entity pass by their cell; it seemed most were unconscious or had taken their leave as did Gloria and the others. For a few minutes now, the video screen, which had been illuminated for most for their night, was blank again. Black.

The idea of being bored was not something he could consider, nor was it a hidden agenda of his mind. He could not fathom the notion of being bored at a time such as this.

By holding himself perfectly still, Ned could feel Freddy's body shivering. The bear looked to him closely, utter concern and placed a hand on his exposed arm, where the human's shirt did not cover him.

...once again, after fluid torment, just a brief moment of distraction came.

Ned moved away quickly to retrieve a collection of blankets from a pile hidden beside the couch, and did his best to entrap Freddy's body within the fabric items, stuffing and tucking the open corners around the human's corpus.

For a few moments, Ned watched -

...that Freddy had been drained of every ounce of blood from his body, even his mucous membranes were dry, there seemed to be nothing left of him for the icy winds and tidal waves to destroy...

• as no visible sign of comfort came to his friend.

It was then clear that Ned would be required to use his own heat to help his friend. He nodded to himself and smiled, knowing well that it would succeed and he could keep the human comfortable. In addition, Ned would be able to achieve a subtle intimacy that was greatly desired, touching him in the way a friend should in order to better a situation such as this. This was the reasoning he manifested, but in truth, he simply wanted to be close to his friend.

As he removed his coat - a black jacket of leather - and his undershirt, he unwrapped a portion of Freddy's fabric container and proceeded to integrate himself, to conform his body to the position in which the human was currently set.

Ned inched closer and closer to Freddy. It was strange to feel such muscle spasms vibrating throughout his whole body; the human was shivering so badly.

...what possibility was it, then, that a wall - or so it seemed - could have manifested itself. It moved carefully, spreading its shielding self up along his back, protecting him from one of the frozen tornadoes spiraling from that horizon beyond.

Once he secured himself, the bear grinned with delight as he felt the human instinctively push backward against his warm body, as if asking to be held.

While Ned's round, protruding belly did not allow the human to fit completely, he managed his best to get Freddy's body snuggly fit along his, the two males fitting like spoons alongside each other. Immediately after, Ned wrapped both arms around his friend. Leaning their left sides against the couch, the bear slithered his left around under Freddy's left arm and around the waist area; his right arm moved around the reverse side.

The sound that had just emanated from Freddy was unintelligible. That and neither was it readily available to determine whether it was in comfort or joy, for it had lasted for just a short moment. No matter, Ned thought, he was sure that even the minute warmth for the moment would help Freddy slightly, help him regain consciousness maybe.

...At once, the majority of the nails of ice and raping of his every nerve curtailed. Each planet-sized tendril of torture shriveled and disappeared almost entirely. Freddy could feel mercy wrap around him, the heat - though dim - radiating something like a furnace. At the point of desperate sadness, Freddy's psyche convinced him that this sensation was the most pleasant, heavenly concept possible by mortal souls...

So there both reclined, Ned nestling his head and muzzle across Freddy's shoulder and making minor, final adjustments to his position on the couch. Then simultaneously, both males inhaled and exhaled deep breaths of the stale air around them. The bear was the shield Freddy was feeling, and Ned's spirit became saturated with the human's dwindling aura, inadvertently fuelling Freddy's existence of peace.

Ned had felt sleepy at first, deeply lethargic, but merely the sensation of Freddy's paralyzed body against him elevated his spirits high and his heart rate accelerated. It was pleasing for Ned to hold his friend like that, and the feel of Freddy's body, his bones and topography, was relaxing. It would not excite him though; he would not allow himself to feel romantic in this situation with the human semi-conscious.

...those blistering, white tornadoes around and inside him spread outward, brushed away like dust, and the light dimmed to a dull grey. The sounds and sights remained; Freddy comprehended nothing but the existence of mercy. He fought back the memories of destruction and torture in his mind and focused only on the peace that was now ensconcing his universe.

This place was now the corporeally manifested fantasy of Ned's, being so near to his friend. Helping in any way possible, bringing whatever manner of happiness to the one he thought he loved, there seemed to be no better way to express his love than to kiss him. Of course, that might have been his instincts in digesting the human's aroma. He found it so pleasant, so utterly satisfying.

In this position, this setting of serenity, Ned knew he could relax and get his night's sleep. As half of an hour passed and Ned could not fall asleep, the bear began to feel a bit hopeless, but then he suddenly became aware of his endeavors, that achievement had been made. The human's shivering had completely ceased, and Ned - testing the outside air with his hand - was satisfied with how warm the interior felt in contrast to the cold air outside.

With the knowledge of how large a difference he made in Freddy's comfort, Ned relaxed once again in his bliss, and for a few minutes managed to sleep. That bit of sleep did not remain, being curtailed by a sudden surge of movement coming from the human. Ned did not understand what it had been - probably just a spasm - but pulled and squeezed his friend closer still.

Moments lapsed and quiescence resumed. Taking a single notion that he had earned the privilege for further snuggling, Ned moved his head only slightly in order to kiss the human's neck, underneath that tiny ear. But the act of a single kiss was only the first of something extremely addictive. With a chuckle, he found irony in how bland he truly found those chems - which were supposed to be so addictive - but just the scent and taste of Freddy's skin made him succumb to his desires.

Bringing his inhibitions towards those places hidden in his mind, he gave a few, light caresses with his tongue, lapping gently at the human's neck and ear. Being in the place of his dreams, he could not for the life of him, crawl throughout enough to begin to think that Freddy, although reveling in the magnificent comfort Ned was giving him - only because of the state of mental torture - could possibly dislike being licked and kissed.

It only took a sigh, a breathy sound - ambiguous in every possible way - to convince Ned that Freddy was happy.

...deep in side the universe, the universe that was built on eternally churning ice, there accumulated the greatest simulacrum of happiness. Even as those chemicals clogging his mentality dwindled, the immense yet gentle warmth cocooning him had rescued him. Whatever the thing was in construct, in tangible existence, he would be grateful for the remainder of his life.

Ned further appealed to his desires and issued a pattern of soft petting along Freddy's chest, using his hand to carefully caress his friend, tracing his digits along the ridges of the ribcage. The boy was so thin; Ned would have to see about getting Freddy to eat more often to fatten him up. Thus he continued, softly kissing the human's neck and ear, his shoulder - between intervals of gently constricting the male into a hug.

Although the bear intensely enjoyed the moment, there remained a slight trepidation that this memory for Freddy would be a bad one. Of course, his trip would engender a hatred that would most likely remain with him forever; Ned's cause of distress was for the highly unlikely event that, upon learning of the bear's actions tonight, Freddy would be infuriated.

He did not want to think about such things, and he continued his loving on his friend. Even with the knowledge that Freddy possibly did not feel the same way he did. It was the bear's utter joy at holding and snuggling closely with his friend that kept him doing so until his mind settled finally, and thus he fell asleep. Hours, this time.