Serval and Sheep (Chapter 30)
Brian stops by his dad's house for dinner.
"Brian!"
The rock dove barely shuts the front door when he is pounced on by two squealing children. His little stepbrother Cooper leaps all the way up to his neck, painfully digging his claws into his nape while trying to straddle his older bro's chest, using his protruding tummy as a seat. May, the youngest of the three, settles for clinging to his left arm, also occupied by a gray duffle bag containing his work clothes. Brian stumbles, overwhelmed by the sudden assault, and desperately tries to juggle the squabs while also not crashing face-first on the carpeted floor.
"C'mon guys, take it easy!" He cries. His balance finally giving out, he flings the two kids and his duffle bag onto the nearby couch before toppling over.
As he rolls over, rubbing his pummeled gut with a groan, he hears not exclamations of concern, but rather the elated squeals of his step siblings eager to do that again. Their grinning faces come into view, blocking out the light from the LED bulb above. Seeing the state of their brother, they settle for jumping on his still-tender stomach, which knocks whatever air the bird may have still had right out of him.
"Your tummy is like a trampoline!" May titters.
"Feels more like a punching bag now..." Brian croaks, lifting a shaky hand to pat her head.
Cooper sways to and fro in amusement. "Pop said you weren't coming this weekend!"
"Well, I spent all of last week with you guys, so I wasn't sure," Brian coughs and begins to sit up, forcing the younger birds to slide off of his torso. "But I changed my mind. Your jumps are getting high, Coop. At this rate, you'll be flying around in no time!"
"Mommy thinks so too!" Cooper peeps with a face filled with pride. "The other day, I jumped from the couch aaaall the way to the kitchen counter! Like an airplane!"
"I was there, remember?" Brian chuckles.
May tugs on his sleeve. "When are you gonna get a license? Then you can take me to the arcade super fast!"
"I gotta be 18 for that, May-May. Pop has a car, anyways."
May pouts. "But flying is way cooler."
A voice rings from the inside of the apartment. "Brian, is that you?"
A stout middle-aged rock dove sputters into the living room, nearly tripping on a clutter of toys scattered about the floor. The look of confusion on his face turns into one of vexation. "Son, what are you doing here?"
"I just finished my shift in the cafe, so I thought I might stop by. I can give you my pay cheque now if you want."
"Didn't I tell you to take this week off?" The older bird huffs. "It's bad enough you worked through all of spring break--"
"It's fine, Pop," Brian reassures. "I like my job. Plus, I wanted to see Coop and May." He gives a light bonk on each of their heads, causing them to giggle in delight.
"We haven't even started on dinner yet." His father protests.
"I'll order something. It's Saturday after all. How does pizza sound?"
Cooper and May erupt into shrieks of joy. Pizza is the every child's true weakness. The senior bird remains with an unconvinced grimace. Brian quickly thinks of something to change the subject.
"Where's Marsha?"
"She's taking out the trash. Should be back any moment."
As if on cue, the front door opens to reveal a female pigeon, around the same age as Brian's father. Her small eyes widen when she spots the teenage bird sitting in the entrance.
"Oh, goodness! You scared me half to death, Brian!"
Brian quickly gets up and dusts himself off so he can meet her at eye level (the good thing about pigeons is that they're all about the same height).
"Hi, Marsha. I decided to stop by for dinner, if that's okay."
The brown and white female rock dove gives an uneasy smile, and her eyes flicker over to her husband, whose resigned shrug lets her know this is what's happening.
"Of course, Brian! This is your home too, after all." She coos.
Cooper springs up off the floor, zips to the couch and jumps up and down on the cushions excitedly. "Brian's gonna order a pizza!"
"Yummy!" Marsha flashes a smile before quickly switching to a scolding frown. "And no jumping on the couch."
"How's everything at school, Brian?" Marsha asks while cutting a slice of pea-and-corn pizza. "Is everyone excited to be back?"
"I don't think any student is excited at the end of spring break." Brian laughs in between bites. "But it's nice to see everyone again. And the campus is always pretty."
"Brian should go to my school instead!" May suddenly pipes up. "That way he can live with us again!"
"May!" Brian's father snaps.
"Aw, May-May..." Brian smiles sheepishly. "I already went to preschool. And I still visit every week. If you saw any more of me, you'd get sick of me!"
"Nuh-uh! I'm sick of Cooper!"
"Don't talk about your brother like that." Marsha chides. "Brian can't spend all his time on us. He's in high school, so he needs to focus on his studies and his friends."
Brian's father nods in agreement. "That's right. He doesn't need to worry about us. Brian needs to spend more time with his friends."
"Hey--"
"Do you have a girlfriend yet?" Cooper abruptly cuts off Brian's interjection. The teenage pigeon nearly chokes on the pizza.
"Wh-Wha-- No!"
"Aren't you supposed to get a girlfriend in high school?" Cooper grins slyly. "I already have three."
"Are you collecting them?!"
"You never talk about any females you're interested in..." The eldest male mutters, deep in thought. "There has to be a couple of birds you like. Noah's Arc is ritzy, so there must be a lot of great choices."
"No--"
"You don't have to be shy around us, Brian!" Marsha chimes in. "I'm sure your father can give you some great advice if you need it!"
"Wai--"
"And she doesn't have to be a rock dove, you know." His father continues. "Your cousin Benny started dating a quail, if you can believe it--"
"HOLD IT!" A red-faced Brian squawks.
The middle-aged pigeons go silent.
"I'm not thinking about getting a girlfriend!" He declares. "I gotta focus on keeping my scholarship and my part time jobs, and you guys. So, enough with the girlfriend stuff! Sheesh!" He snatches the slice of pizza from his plate and snarfs it down, still heated.
A moment of silence passes, save for the clinking of silverware and pecking.
"Can I get a boyfriend?" May squeaks quietly.
Her father shoots her a look. "Not until you're 30."
After dinner, Marsha, Cooper and May all sit at the couch to watch a cartoon. Brian insisted on doing the dishes, while his father cleans up the table. Scrubbing the dried cheese and sauce off the plate, Brian tries to cool down, to no avail. He hears his father approach from behind. The older pigeon sets the last bits of dirty cutlery in the sink and goes to put away boxes of juice and bottles of condiments in the fridge.
On any other day, Brian would have stayed quiet and moved on. Pigeons are hardly the confrontational type. But today, he lets his frustration get the better of him.
"Do you not... want me here?"
His dad freezes. "What?"
"You've been like this since spring break. Don't act like you don't know what I'm talking about."
"I--" His father stops himself. He takes a deep breath and scratches the scraggy tuft of feathers on the back of his head. "You're right. I don't want you here."
Brian whips around to meet his father's eyes. The latter doesn't bother averting his gaze.
"Did I do something? Does Marsha have a problem with me?"
"No, nothing like that!" His father raises his hands in protest. "This has nothing to do with her! It's the opposite!"
Brian says nothing.
"Look, Bry-Guy, I know growing up hasn't been easy for you, especially after your mother..." The old pigeon sighs. "And that's mostly my fault. You've had to spend most of your life helping out with money and chores and... it's not fair to you."
"I've never had a problem with--"
"Let me finish." His dad stops him. "Problem or no, you're in high school now. In the best high school of the whole country, no less. Kids your age shouldn't want to spend all their time providing for their family. What kind of teenager works eight hour shifts during spring break?"
Brian furrows his brow. "Dad, don't act like we don't need the money--!"
"Marsha and I do enough to keep this house comfortable. Do you think I'm useless here?"
"You know that's not what I meant. But you're getting on in years, and pigeons don't live very long. If anything happens, I need to think about Cooper and May."
"I'm their father, that's MY job!" He caws. "You act like I'm going to die tomorrow! You're seventeen for chrissake, Brian! What kind of seventeen-year-old spends his Saturday nights eating cheap pizza with his folks instead of going out with his friends? What kind of seventeen-year-old hasn't at least kissed a girl?!"
"Y-you don't know that!" Brian yelps.
"Have you?"
"..."
"Brian, it's time you stopped feeling like you owe something to us. You're the first of our family to ever receive a scholarship in anything, let alone Noah's Arc. You're one of a kind. I don't want you to waste your potential because you feel weighed down by us. We'll be fine without you."
Brian smacks this palm hard against the fridge. Tears well up at the corners of his eyes.
"How can you say that?!" He bawls. "This is my family! You are my family! You can't just kick me out because you feel guilty for dropping the ball after Mom died! This house means more to me than my grades, or my friends, or anything else ever will! If I have to drop out tomorrow to get a full-time job, I will! I can't lose you guys, no matter what, because that's what I've decided matters to me!"
All that's left in the air is the faint buzz of the LED lightbulbs. The two rock doves look at each other for a long time, neither one saying a word. Brian's chest heaves as he struggles to catch his breath from his rant. They both know Marsha and the squabs must have abandoned the TV long ago and are on the other side of the door listening in.
"Bry-Guy..." The senior bird rasps. "I know you don't mean that. And if you do, you shouldn't. But thank you."
Brian envelops his father in a tight hug. "Don't worry about it. Now let's finish cleaning up."
Brian can't sleep. At his step siblings' behest, he was convinced to stay the night and return to the academy the next morning. After playing video games and hide-and-seek, it was soon bed time for the tykes, and Brian decided to join them thanks to his exhaustion.
He looks at the young rock doves, already fast asleep in their little beds, and pulls his worn sheets to ward off the ever-present draft in the room. Despite his fatigue, he remains unable to sleep. The argument with his father remains fixed in his mind, unable to resolve itself.
Even if they had made up, it's still not okay. Brian truly meant it when he said he doesn't mind helping his family. It's what he's known for most of his life, even before his mother's passing. They were never rich, and pigeons must always keep unexpected deaths in mind. Should he be bothered by being unbothered? Just thinking about it gives him migraines.
Pop is being too proud, and also not proud enough at the same time. Even if he and Marsha alone manage to make ends meet, it would be just barely so without my help. Why can't he just accept my help? Where did he get the idea I'm too good for him now?
And it's not like all I do is work. I have friends. Shucks, I should have said that, why didn't I say that? We even hung out during spring break! What exactly is his vision of a high school anyways? Nonstop parties? And what kind of a parent would encourage that? Why on Earth does Cooper have three girlfriends?!
Ow, my head. Calm down. Ugh. That whole girlfriend thing was mortifying. It's not like I can tell him the truth... especially not in front of the other three. I can't lose him. I can't lose them. No matter what. No matter what I have to do, what I have to hide. I'm a goddamn lightbulb.
...
Should I text him? No way, that won't help at all. It'll only make me feel worse. I need a friend now. Solomon.
Brian slowly reaches for the phone resting on the nightstand, careful so as not to wake his siblings up. He turns it on and squints at the sudden flash of light before opening up the messaging app. He gently types, trying to avoid making sound with his claws.
"hey, sol! u up?? (•?•) /"
He waits a bit. Solomon is usually a fast tester, but can sometimes go into long periods of radio silence. He hopes this isn't one of those times. Luckily, the text's check marks turn blue, and Solomon begins typing something out.
"It's only 10pm. Of course I am."
"haha right! I'm so tired rn it feels later than it actually is!"
"Is everything okay?"
"yeah. i just wanted to ask u something."
"Go ahead."
"have u ever lied to ur family?"
Solomon doesn't type anything for a while, but remains online. Brian wonders if he somehow touched a nerve. Eventually, a new message pops up.
"Yes."
"i guess everyone has huh? lol" Brian pauses. "im not sure why im asking u this lol. i dont really have a point"
"You are an honest person, Brian. I'm sure whatever lie you have told to your family is one with good intentions."
"its more like im keeping a secret..."
"Do I know this secret?"
Brian gulps. "no"
"Very well. Then that is your business. Everyone has secrets. You shouldn't feel ashamed for having a life outside your home."
He smiles. Classic Solomon. Cool, discreet and to the point.
"u always know what to say! (????) i always want my family by my side!"
"You and I keep secrets for very different reasons."
"so mysterious (?_? )... wanna talk about it?"
"Didn't you text me for advice?"
"haha tru! =^.^="
"Where on Earth do you get those strange faces?"
"i memorized them! look"
"(??????)? ?"
"(?? ³(ˆ?ˆc)"
"(????)"
"?( ?'??'?)?"
"?(¬?¬)? (this one is naughty)"
"Please stop."