FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

Vivica slowly paced around the wide rim of the watch tower while doing her best to scan for any signs of danger or distress.

After her thousandth or so lap, her ears once more caught wind of the ghostly song she had heard earlier in the day. Taking out her pencil and pad, she carefully noted the melody of the song. Once it ceased, she took out her green whistle and called Enkoro. Who appeared a few moments later.

```

Enkoro: You called?

```

Vivica held out her notepad to Enkoro.

```

Vivica: I heard another strange song. It's strange though, mimiky birds aren't usually up this late.

Enkoro: *thoughtfully staring at the notepad* Interesting, this one uses two different ciphers. Perhaps it truly is just mimiky birds...

Vivica: Did you think it could be something else?

Enkoro: They partly matchup with known chewa codes. However, they seem to be mostly gibberish. I'm thinking, we may have a group of mimiky birds visiting from the far south. Perhaps that's why their sleeping pattern is strange too.

Vivica: I wonder if Mirra-su went off to investigate to make sure that was the case.

Enkoro: That would seem a likely scenario. Thank you for lending me your ears. You should go get some rest for tomorrow.

Vivica: I don't mind staying on watch longer.

Enkoro: I'd rather you be well rested, for tomorrow.

Vivica: Any special reason?

Enkoro: Starting tomorrow, you and Kion will be watching over the grigy apprentice in training, Moring Elixcia, along with her co-schooling companion, Deca Ulvata, and their teacher, Unica Ulvata, while they study in the dark green zones.

Vivica: Shouldn't that be a job for a senior rammu?

Enkoro: It is. You two are going along to support Teran. That way he can stay wholly focused on Moring. Moring's safety is of the utmost importance. So, even though you two will be along to protect Deca and Unica. However, you are to prioritize Moring's safety above all else. *clears throat* It was also a personal request of Airina that Kion be allowed to spend time with Moring, and I have... concerns with how distracting Yineh can be. Our future grigy-jhu is, after all, out to learn, not to play.

Vivica: Ye~ah, Yi-su isn't the best to have around when you need to focus. *awkward chuckle* *awkward fidgeting* *low whisper* Of course, neither am I...

Enkoro: I could assign Demoron to the task instead, if you'd prefer. Though, frankly, you're my top choice. Despite your own personal opinions, you're quite skilled and knowledgeable. With less self-sabotage, I think, you could rival Mirra in time.

Vivica: *unamused stare* That's not funny Enky.

Enkoro: I wasn't trying to be funny.

Vivica: *worried and critical stare*

Enkoro: I truly do believe you have the ability. Kylola believes the same as I do.

Vivica: *somber* I'm going to get some rest.

Enkoro: *hesitant* I'm sorry, if I upset you.

Vivica: What if I don't want to be as good as Mirra-su?

Enkoro: Don't you want to be able to protect others to the best of your abilities?

Vivica: *somber* Sometimes I don't think I should be a rammu.

Enkoro: 'tis true, your intentions have never been pure. You joined to follow your brother and stayed almost exclusively for him and Kylola. From what I've gathered, even Chyla has purer and more honorable intentions than yourself.

Vivica: You're not helping me feel better about this Enky... Why did you even approve me?

Enkoro: I didn't. Bora had already arranged for your approval, regardless of the outcome of your interview.

Vivica: *dismayed shock* W-why?

Enkoro: I'm afraid I was never privy to that information.

Vivica: You really don't think I have what it takes to be a rammu?

Enkoro: Let's imagine something grim for a moment, say both Kylola and your brother are lost, and Kion decided not to continue past his initiation after the loss of arguably the most valuable person in his life. Which then causes Lina to get scared and return to Tarico as well. What would you do?

Vivica: I can't even imagine that.

Enkoro: *disapproving stare*

Vivica: *pained groan* Okay, I don't want to imagine it... or rather, I don't want to focus on it, since I already imagined it as you spoke.

Enkoro: *disapproving stare*

Vivica: *defeated sigh* I would run... If I lost everything, I would just run off into the wild and never return... I wouldn't be able to stay a rammu, and I could never face my family after being dishonored.

Enkoro: You know what they say about never. If you ran away, you would surely come face to face with your family.

Vivica: If Dasak was gone, no one else in my family could come after me.

Enkoro: *raised eyebrow* It pains me that you don't think of me as family. I'll admit my words during this conversation have been harsh. However, I do hope that you'll always remember that I care about you as an important member of my family.

Vivica: If you don't respect me, how can you care about me?

Enkoro: *extremely raised eyebrow* I don't recollect saying I don't respect you. Though even if you did lose my respect, I'd still care about you, just the same. Once family, always family, after all. *reassuring smile*

Vivica: *weak smile* My greatest fear about getting better is that it could force me to someday save someone else over someone I care about. Because I know it's what Mirra-su would do... it's what you'd do... it's what any true rammu would do... If it was me or some stranger... I know who you'd pick... It's not fair that we have to make those kinds of decisions.

Enkoro: It's not a decision, it's an honor. Every person has people who care deeply for them; as rammu, we have collectively agreed that our own lives are a reasonable sacrifice to protect everyone's loved ones, to the best of our abilities.

Vivica: I know, but...

Enkoro: Few rammu truly live up to the ideal rammu. More here in Ankarok and Silaka than Tarico or Raidico, mind you, but I'd wager a fair price to say that the majority of rammu today are much like yourself, and will likely stay in that state much of their lives. You may find many kindred spirits if you talked to people from the other villages at the games more. After all, few people are born with a desire to die in a flash of glory, nor see their loved ones perish in one either. Though here in Ankarok, you will likely lose at least one person you care about early on in life, and that is an experience that'll forever change you. Though even before that you're likely to lose the life of a stranger, and that will also forever change you. For myself, I still remember the look of terror on the girl's face as she fell. Had I taken my training more seriously at the start, it's not hard to imagine that I'd have been the hair bit faster needed to save her... to save Doulia Endrosa. Her death is the only one that truly haunts me, as it's the only one that I feel near certain I could have prevented.

Vivica: *stunned* Doulia... That's the name of the sister my mother lost...

Enkoro: *affirmative nod* Indeed, my early career laziness cost you the opportunity to know your aunt. Which I'm truly sorry for. I've spent quite a bit of time around your family since then and have learned quite a lot about her. *somber* I think the two of you would have been good friends.

Vivica: *somber* Mother said that too... *heavy sigh* Thanks for being candid with me, Enky. *weak smile* I know it's not easy telling people things they don't want to hear, and unlike me you do it knowing you're doing it. *awkward chuckle* *concerned frown* I feel like I should say something more, but I'm kind of at a loss for words. I know Mother never blamed anyone for her sister's death, but I'm sure you already know that. I'd say I'm sure you did your best at the time, but that's obviously no comfort to you... *worried*

Enkoro: Some things are best said through actions and not words. Which is to say, I accept hugs. *inviting smile*

```

After a long embrace, Enkoro nudged Vivica to head off. Upon reaching her room in the trainee building, she was surprised to find her lamp on, along with Lina, sleeping with a book half covering her face, just to the side of her sleeping mat.

Picking up the book, Vivica read a sentence aloud, then poked Lina's cheek.

```

Vivica: Are you really asleep...

*silence along with several more pokes*

Vivica: You're a pretty heavy sleeper... hopefully I can keep from blabbing that to Yi-su... Any~way, I can't just leave you lying here. *contemplative hum* Guess I'll just pick you up and put you on my mat.

```

After picking Lina up and moving her to her sleeping mat, Vivica turned off the lamp, then laid next to her.

```

Vivica: So~ ye~ah, this is a little awkward... I mean, it's not the first time we've slept together, but it's awkward since I'm not super tired right now and was kind of planning just to toss and turn a lot. *awkward laughter*

*long silence*

Vivica: I suppose I'll just read the book you brought with you... On the "bright" side, I can read perfectly in the dark... of course you didn't seem to be bothered by the light, but I hate wasting the oil. *awkward chuckle and sigh* How can you possibly still be asleep? I'm the other way myself. I wake up at every tiny out-of-place sound.

```