FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

The Monsters present take this lull in convo as an opportunity to light their cigarettes, which Butters and Chord had been fidgeting with their unlit ones during the entire convo. Luckily Lousid had one handy, which looked like it was borrowed straight from a pride event, being rainbow coloured with the logo of some corporation that likely funds the organisations trying to legislate all queer life out of existence. But bless them for their service tonight in letting these gays light up. Chord is the first one to break this new found silence.

-I just don't get this fascination you have with these 'sapians Butters. Surely if you're just feeling horny you can hit up a human, just tell them to meet you in the bathroom and it's done? Just seems like a lot of rigmarole to do the date and everything when it's not gonna work out.

Butters leans forward in their seat in preparation, it's times like this that they remember they are typically the 'Human Liaison' in their social circles. So it's time for The Lean, the lean of knowing it's your job to be the educator for the night.

-The rigmarole is like... The entire appeal, tho, the entire point. Begins Butters. Like yeah I get that I could just have a quickie in the gents, but even THAT like has a whole ritual around it, it's kind of a whole ordeal for them. A system! You meet them, you do a nice little date thing, sometimes several of them and then you fuck them, sometimes you even keep hanging out. Like it's a whole process and it feels nice!

Chord leans back in her chair, followed by a shrug.

-Genuinely, nothing about that seems like an improvement. She replies.

-Well okay, does the vendor put onions and mustard on a hot dog and you whinge that it's an obstacle to eating the thing? Asks Butters. That's how you sound.

-Blluueellll okay then! Explain it to us, what little extra bits do you get from the Humans? Asks Fluu

-Okay if we're still like going with the getting railed in the stalls example, like Humans have a whole thing of if they ever directly say what they mean they will actually walk into and kill themselves. Explains Butters.

-That's uhh... Hooooooootttt? Says Lousid, genuinely baffled.

-It's hot in that they'll do it themselves instead me lifting a talon yeah. Follows up Chord.

-Shut UP, I'm trying to listen! Commands Fluu, waving the other two Monsters down. So what's good about that?

-Well it's like the anticipation, like needing to ask without asking, like oohh feeling the connections and then it's like "Aahhhh when are either one of us gonna do it?" Like it's exciting! Explains Butters.

-Hmmmmm love it when people say what they don't mean and are obtuse on purpose. Comments Lousid. I would have an anxiety attack in minutes.

-Okay, okay, that's fair. But it's also stuff like the aftermath, there's a whole texting etiquette after the fact. Explains Butters.

-Etiquette? Asks Lousid

-Yeah like you have to be out of view point before they can admit they had a nice time and meet up again, Explains Butters.

Fluu and Chord stare back at Butters in astonishment.

-No I know how it sounds, but it's like... Anticipation while you wait for your bus like, then you get the text and it's like aaahhh release. Explains Butters, none the wiser of how psychotic they sound.

-So like, let me get this straight, they can't say nice things during the date, they can't ask you to fuck, they can't say they had fun, but they can say it after a few minutes when you leave, but like not too long after otherwise they're avoiding you? The slime interrogated, desperately trying to comprehend as if human social cues were a math equation.

Butters looks down at their drink and taps the glass absent-mindedly.

-Well of course it sounds bad when you put it under the smallest scrutiny like that. Replies Butters. But no, it does mean they can be straight with you too! Like I know the date went bad tonight cos I texted the Human about meeting up again, and he said "I'll think about it."

-Wait, how does that mean it went bad? Asks Chord.

-Well, "I'll think about it" means "I've thought about it already, and I will never contact you again." Like it's a whole thing, after a few dates you get the lingo.

Fluu reconnects the streams coming out of their sleeves to their head, which is the Slime equivalent of holding your head in your hands I supposed, as they outburst:

-This is all so silly, it's so open ended! JUST SAY THE THING YOU MEAN INSTEAD OF IMPLYING IT! AAAAAAA. That's like a million opportunities for flubs and goofs and the occasional hiccup.

-Yeah right? Monsters have got a good thing going on, I like the 'everyone's on the cards' thing we have going on. No one's ever had to 'think about it' cos of my beak, explains Chord.

Butters lets out a long sigh.

-Yeah well I'm not so keen on it, humans are just a lot more dependent and... Soft? Like in a way we aren't. I kinda envy that and don't just wanna leave it on the table. Monsters can be so callous when they just drop you and move on, humans have a whole little ritual when they break things off with you and that's nice.

-Glluuuggg, Flu moans. That sounds looooooong. I'd rather they just get it over with so I can mark them off my phone contacts and squelch on over to the next one!

-Oh yeah? What if there is no 'next one'?

-Prrrllbb, of course there's a next one! There's too much attention around and not enough monsters to receive it!

Lousid leans forward, carrying a more frustrated tone to his voice then before.

-Well snot for brains and cellular makeup, maybe not all of us can just walk into The Hound and pick up a suitor from the crowd like that. Break-ups even little ones are hard man, doesn't it feel bad when you get dropped or ghosted or whatever?

-Not really, I mean it's just how they feel right? Replied Chord. C'est la vie

-Really? That shit is traumatic for me, replies Butters with an increasingly animated voice. Even just someone not replying on OKCuties puts me out for the entire day like, proper triggers my Borderline stuff. It would be nice to have some level of catering to that? Instead of just being chucked from person to person, which you'd never get with Monsters.

Chord's brow lowered at the sound of that statement, clearly tampering with the Harpies nerves as she went in for the kill:

-Oh yeah? Did humans cater to you when they tell you that your paws make you look like a freak? Were they soft and courteous when they Think About It for seven years, cos the thought of their friends seeing you snapped them out of thinking solely with their genitals? Cos it sounds like all the things you say us big baaaaad monsters do, 'sapians are doing to you two fold.

Chord sits up in her seat and downs the rest of her drink.

-Like what is it Butters? Is it cos deep down you agree with them that we're freaks? One day you'll see that our way is better, everything you want is here with your kin. For example: Miss Fluu my gorgeous vatt of mucus, I humbly request we retreat back to mine, where I would like you to come through my ass and out my mouth and fuck my insides until I pass out.

Fluu bounces out of her seat as well.

-My feathered friend, it would be my pleasure.

Chord runs their talons through Fluu's arm streams and leans in to emulate a kiss on the wrist. Her lips now becoming an unnatural amount of moist. Acting like that isn't very visible, gross and weird. She turns to Butters.

-Besides all that stuff about not wanting someone to throw you away, be devoted and dependant. I know that's complete horseshit. Chord accuses.

-Oh yeah? And how do you know that? Asks Butters, with utter confidence that the universe will not go out of it's way to clown them in this moment.

Ooops that's exactly what it did, as Chord tips their glass in the direction of the door behind Butters. The Squirrel turns around to see a Monster who has just escaped a multi-hour explanation of an obscure 90's advert campaign, head to the beer garden.

The Werecat named Chloe (She/They?) comes bobbing into the bear garden, sporting an open red shirt with white flower prints covering it all over. The open shirt exposes a cat themed bra, with each cup being a cat's head, other then this their chest and stomach are exposed. Bellow a belt with a cat shaped insignia on it, she attempts to wear white suit trousers. Emphasis on attempt as the bottom cuffs of the trousers are shredded to bits, as they were clearly made to fit human fit, not huge paws. But she really likes the trousers and this is what you have to do to look good in a world that doesn't even make clothes for you.

-You see, I know cos everything you want from 'Sapians, the kind of love your kin would kill to know, just walked through that door. You already have it and it's still not enough. Chord finishes in hushed tones, before immediately getting out from her seat and returning the volume of her voice to normal. Heeeeyyy Chlazzzaaaaah!!!!

With cigarette in mouth, they wander over to the table and places her pint on it. She then backtracks a little to grab one of the decorative stones from a bed of pebbles, and after extracting one of her claws, flicks her nail against the stone. The sparks light up her cig first try as she has the process down to an art. She then sees Butters and Lousid looking miserable and pulls up a seat next to them.

-Oi oi my good dykes and bitches... Oh and uh, Lousid.

Everyone gives their nods before an truly uncomfortable silence falls onto the group. Partly due to Chord's excellently timed called out that has simply eviscerated the Squirrel where they stand. But also for Butters the entire reason they've been avoiding Chloe is the inevitable grilling about their date tonight and look: It's already a bad thing, but then to have to relive it several times in one night and for the coup de grâce: A lecture from your only friends about the moral implications of your taste in dates. They were already hanging on by their last spoon and this is gonna be what tips them over the edge, they braced for it... Still bracing... Oh wow a full minute this is profoundly uncomfortable... Is it gonna be a thing where Butters says something and that's when she'll start?... Oh this is hell just start already!!!

Butters finally turns to their side to look at Chloe who is still staring into space with her ciggy in her mouth. Eventually she turns slightly towards Butters and returns their gaze from the side of her eye. Butters then shrugs towards her as if prompting her to begin and she just turns her head back and stares into space. Butters might have a stroke if this goes on any longer.

-So are you not gonna grill me about the date tonight? Asks Butters.

-Nope. Replies Chloe.

The table joins Butters in leaning expectantly towards Chloe.

-So... You're not even a little curious? Asks Butters.

-Nope. I know it went bad, you don't need to tell me that.

-You don't know, maybe it went well, so well he proposed and i'm here for my last drink before we sail off to his private island.

Chloe glances at the other patrons at the table, with all three slowly shaking their heads. Chord even mouthing the word "Incestuous" to the Cat. Chloe jolts back a little, her carefully executed facade ruined by "Oh no, life is worse then I assume always actually." But manages to regain her composure.

-So okay, now you know it went terribly, so just tell me to fuck off or whatever. Protests Butters as they slump into their seat.

Chloe lets the scene stew in silence for a little longer as she smokes her cigarette, before granting mercy to the Squirrel but revealing:

-No, not tonight. She slowly replies.

She finishes the rest of her cigarette and as she puts it out on the table in front of her, she scoots towards Butters and wraps her arm around Butters as she excitedly addresses the other Monsters.

-It's cos I know I don't have to. I dunno if you three knew this, but Butters is on their chaos arc at the moment. Chloe explains.

-Whaaaa? Asks Chord

-Yeah what? Asks an equally confused Butters.

Chloe inches their chair closer to Butters, as she puts her arm around The Squirrel and gesturing with the other paw as if to show them off.

-Listen trust me yeah? This one, the one we all used to all excitedly gather around the beer garden for tales of their next horrible Human date?

-Happy to hear my misery was something you lot looked forward too. Butters quips while lighting the end of their new cigarette with Chloe's one.

-But that's just it yeah: Was. This is the first date with a human they've been on in a year! We don't shame a bitch for relapsing, we celebrate them working on beating their problem.

Chloe lifts her glass, as she clanks the rim onto the empty pint glasses that littered the table, a facsimile of a toast in Butters honour. The Squirrel tenses up somewhat, they didn't know how to feel about this. Like it feels good? To be praised for trying and now looked down for failing? What? They were so ready to get reamed for this tonight, perhaps they were even counting on it. A cyclical process of Doing Stupid Thing and Being Hurt For It. Their "Well, I'm technically not doing it myself" method of self-harming of intentionally disappointing their friends and taking the consequence full on.

Of course, The Cat is fully aware of the conflict this brings to Butters` mind. The observer may see this as a kind act with no thought put behind it. But Chloe understands the routine they are sticking their claws into and tearing apart. Cos it's not JUST about a Monster dating Humans, that doesn't actually mean anything. It's the way Butters looks to them for salvation, that they have the secret key to a happy and safe life. Then conversely how much Humanity makes them pay, dearly, for their loyalty to them. The others may see The Squirrel as a lost cause, but they don't see them like Chloe does. She knows they're so close to getting right, so close to seeing their love flourish. Aaaahh and therein lies the quirk of Chloe's situation, a question if this progress has manifested in real life, or if you want to see something hard enough; it's actually a trifling prerequisite to whether or not you see it.

But for now; the tension in Butters` shoulders lessens, a grin creeps on their face and lean into Chloe's embrace.

-Yeah! You know what? Youre right, this was just a little blip in the road. Ive been doing well good since y`know... The Valentines Incident. Brags Butters.

These were not unfamiliar words to the patrons at the table, all except for The Slime who was looking around confused.

-Bluuhh? The Blalentines Incident? Asks Fluu

Chloe swings their head back, absolutely ecstatic to get into telling this story.

-Oh man, let me tell you, this one? Last years Valentines they snapped. I know you`re not from our neck of the woods, but did you hear in Notts when our town centre got flooded after a punch up between Humans and Monsters? Asks Chloe

Fluu slowly nods their head, as Chloe leans away from Butters, yet never breaking their embrace around their shoulder and uses their free paw to block Butters from their sight as she points towards them. Butters fully rolls their eyes.

-Blublulblulargh? You threw bhe first blunch??? Asks Fluu.

-Oooooohhhhh they did a LOT more then that. Alludes Chloe,grinning ear from ear.

-Alright, alright. Announces Butters, taking the reigns of telling their own story from Chloe. So ya enby here may or may not... Have... Politely assisted a cop in transcending this plain of existence.

-So... Murdered. Asks Chord.

-Some... May choose to use that word. I'm going with what I said. Legal speaks Butters in a place where they really don't need to. Annnyywwaayyss, that may or may not of riled the first Human dude to start a brawl against us. One interpretation. I mean who can say? Must've been loads of instigations that night.

-Didn't every Monster in Nottingham make a pact to not instigate anything? A pact you didn't hear about which is why you did that? Asks Chord.

-Who. Can. Saaaaay. Replies Butters. But yeah the Monsters really had my back on that one and like... Yeah I dunno, God you're all right, like turning my back on the love of my fellow Monsters and embracing the fake love bullshit of Sapains just... its no way to live.

Butters leans into Chloe`s chest, as The Cat rubs their back in comfort. Chord lowers their brow as they glance Chloe a look, to which she just shrugs in response with a huge smile. They can think what they like, Chloe knows Butters is on a good path.

There's a silence that falls onto the group, not of awkwardness, but of contentment. A lull of knowing the world is a little better, a little brighter. After a while Chloe is the one to break this tranquillity:

-Fluu... I hate to sound insensitive but... Is that a skull floating inside you?